Unexpected Gifts

Unexpected Gifts

A novella

D.C. Williams

Unexpected Gifts published by D.C. Williams at Smashwords

Copyright 2013 Deborah Anne Williams

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Unexpected Gifts

Chapter One

Nick was alternately trying not to giggle or fall asleep. Both seemed like options as the speaker droned on and on. He looked around the room, trying to find something that might distract him in the rather bare church basement before he either started yawning or laughed outright. The couple sitting next to him looked every bit as bored as he was, and the woman rolled her eyes conspiratorially at Nick. The man leaned over her to whisper in Nick's ear and said, Not only is this guy going on forever, he seems to have forgotten to mention that it's way easier to have successful heterosexual relationships when you're bisexual to start with.

Nick snorted involuntarily and the woman grinned at him and pretended to kick the man. Thankfully the meeting was over soon after that, and Nick stood up. So did the couple and the woman extended her hand and said, Hi, I'm Phoebe, and this nut is Leon. Nick had been trying to pay more attention to women, and he looked at her carefully. She was seriously cute; with frank gray eyes and a pretty mouth thought he actually might not mind kissing. Give Nick a point for a healthy sexual thought.

Nick extended his own hand to Phoebe and Leon and introduced himself. Leon laughed and said softly, I hope that wasn't offensive to you if you're bisexual.

Nick shook his head with a grin and said, No, I'm not. Don't I wish? Not to make light of it, since I know they can be bedeviled by temptation too, but he just made it sound so, so...

Easy., supplied Phoebe. Not to mention boring.

And it takes some talent to make sex sound boring, added Leon. We usually get some pizza after this. Would you like to join us?

Would he ever. He'd been in town for barely six weeks and hadn't spoken more than a few words to anyone except his new therapist and a couple of fellow students. He hadn't even had a real conversation with his roommate. Not only did Phoebe and Leon seem like a lot of fun, being friendly with them wasn't going to require a whole lot of complicated explanations. Leon was definitely hot, but Nick had a lot of practice in pushing that kind of thought away, and wasn't going to dwell on hazel eyes, red lips, or that cute little goatee that would probably feel pleasantly scratchy. Nick repressed that one quickly and replaced it with Phoebe and Leon kissing. He imagined Leon's neat hands twined in Phoebe's short brown curls. Nice, and he wondered if that was a healthy sexual thought. Probably healthier, according to his therapist. He could hear Mark now, Baby steps, Nick.

He followed Leon's truck to the nearest pizza parlor, and sat opposite them in a red vinyl booth. They hadn't said anything about it, but Nick assumed that both of them were in the same boat he was in. Cute as she was, Phoebe was decidedly not girly, and he thought Leon had kind of checked him out as they were leaving the meeting. Of course, he'd been checking Leon out, and really trying not to imagine what was under that plaid button down. Nick also thought that Leon and Phoebe were at least sort of together, since they had been holding hands, but he wasn't going to ask about that either. Kissing Phoebe was starting to sound like it might be an interesting experiment, but if she had a boyfriend; it was not going to be one he got to try.

Oh well. Maybe the sessions with Mark were starting to pay off already, and he'd start thinking about kissing women all the time. Heaven only knew those quacks hadn't done anything except take his parent's money and make him miserable. The rubber band had been bad enough, but having to set his alarm to go off every two hours so he wouldn't dream about sex had been as ridiculous as it was awful. He had been punchy, suffering from sleep deprivation, and not one tiny bit closer to heterosexual when he stopped in to say hi at a campus fellowship meeting at his old school. His friends had been worried, and the advisor had taken one look at him, pulled him aside to find out what was going on, and then called Pastor Brown and his parents to share his concerns.

Then he'd helped Nick choose a school that had a Protestant religious affiliation but was liberal enough that Nick wouldn't feel like he had to keep secrets all the time. God gave you enough of a burden already, he had said. You don't want the additional burden of having to hide that struggle from everyone you meet, every day. He also helped Nick find a therapist who would try to help Nick grow in a healthier Christian direction, but would also work on making it easier for Nick to live with himself as God had made him. Nick was unbelievably grateful to the man. He felt better about himself than he had since his parents had found out about Michael.

Come to think of it, he didn't think he had so much fun out with friends since before he'd broken up with Michael. He hadn't been a total recluse, but he hadn't gone out a whole lot. He didn't feel like he had much in common anymore with most of the people he knew in high school, and almost all of his college friends were really campus fellowship friends, which means he and Michael had them in common. Quite a few of them had more or less known that he and Michael were seeing each other too, and it just made things awkward.

Leon had a quiet but wicked sense of humor and Phoebe felt like his instant best friend. The pizza was pretty good too. They made it thicker and crustier than in New Jersey, but tasty. Although he wished someone would explain to him why they felt the need to fry poor innocent ravioli around here. When they were done eating, Phoebe suggested that they could pick him up next week for the meeting and some more pizza. Nick agreed so quickly that he felt like a dork, but Leon and Phoebe looked really pleased.

In the converted Victorian in what passed for downtown a few days later, Nick told Mark about meeting Leon and Phoebe at the meeting. Good, I'm glad you're making friends and I'm really glad you've been able to encourage those kinds of positive thoughts. This is the first time you've had them?

Since high school, anyway. Nick squirmed a little. I still have the other kind, though.

That's normal. Just like we discussed, those are probably not going to go away completely, no matter how much other progress you make.

I know. I just keep hoping. Now I just need to find a girl I want to kiss who doesn't have a boyfriend.

Excellent. And I'm glad the meetings have been working for you. This couple sounds great, but you do want to be a little cautious about socializing with people you meet there. They understand where you've been and where you're trying to be, but you should remember that most of them wouldn't be there if they didn't struggle with temptation.

You know how long I was with Michael. I'm pretty good at resisting temptation.

Yes, but it isn't really fair for you to be a temptation to others, either. Your friend Michael had somewhat different beliefs about what God's plan for him was. From what you told me, he was comfortable with that temptation, and expected to find the moral courage to resist it.

Nick nodded. I still miss him. I keep waiting to get over it. I still ask myself if I did the right thing.

Mark nodded back and waited for him to continue.

I'm pretty sure we'd still be together if my parents hadn't found us out. And I was awful to him a few times after that.

Mark nodded again. Did he forgive you?

Yes, I think so. He told me I had to find what was right for me.

Smart. Do you think he's happy now?

Yeah, it was what he wanted. Just he used to want it with me, and then he found someone else.

It's understandable for him to move on.

I know. I just feel like I threw away what we had together and it was special.

Those are legitimate feelings. You cared about him, and he must have cared about you.

Was what we had wrong?

Do you think it was wrong?

I don't know. Having sex would have been wrong. I think going ahead with a ceremony and pretending it was a Christian marriage would be wrong, even if he spent a lot of time trying to convince me otherwise. The closeness we had didn't feel wrong.

Then that's a lot of your answer. We need to finish up for this week. For the record, I think wrong isn't really the right word, but it's not the healthiest option God gave you.

Chapter Two

Nick found himself waiting for Thursday night. He honestly wasn't sure what he thought of the meetings, but he was looking forward to seeing Leon and Phoebe. A few of the people didn't seem all that well wrapped and the church basement was kind of depressing. It