Whatcha Gonna Do With a Cowboy

Whatcha Gonna Do With a Cowboy

Jennifer Bennett

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Published by Jennifer Bennett at Smashwords

© 2013. All right Reserved

Chapter 1

Morning, beautiful, a gravelly voice whispered as something nipped at my earlobe. How’d you sleep?

I didn’t open my eyes. I’d had this dream a million times before. One hand slid up my thigh while a pair of tender lips kissed me along my shoulder blade. If I opened my eyes, I’d be alone in my apartment with Hemmingway, my mastiff, licking my cheek. For once I wanted to let the dream play out.

The brush of rough hair against my back and an itchy blanket on my breast caused my eyes to pop open. The memory of the night before rushed back as I bolted upright in bed and stared at the man lying beside me.

I couldn’t have… I wouldn’t have… I’d never…

Oh…my…God!

He stared at me. Somethin’ wrong, darlin’?

I took a deep breath, trying to gather my scattered thoughts. I’d been in a bar, gotten drunk, talked about marrying some guy named Miller, and I’d actually left with him then… Nothing. I forced a smile and muttered, Nothing, Mr. Miller. Nothing at all.

I slid out of bed, carefully taking the blanket with me as not reveal anymore of myself than was necessary. Still, I could feel him watching me roam around what I assumed was his bedroom (because clearly, small room that housed on king size dark wood four post bed, matching night stand with its brass desk lamp on top was not my bedroom.) I tried to keep what remained of my dignity and composure all the while searching for my clothes like a nudist on an Easter egg hunt. I reached down to pull my bra out from under his foot of his bed, but only on cup came up.

Why is my bra ripped in half?

He chuckled. Sorry ‘bout that, darlin’.

I shot him a dirty look. Do you know how much that bra cost me? It’s from Victoria’s Secrets for crying out loud.

He stretched the length of the bed, completely unashamed of his nakedness. I’m real sorry, darlin’. I’ll buy ya ‘nother one.

That’s not the point-I stopped and stared at him, paralyzed by the sight of an absolutely perfect example of a man in front of me laid out like a gift from goddess Venus herself. Oh…my…God.

He put his hands behind his head. He was truly a god among men. His entire upper body seemed to be cut from two beautiful pieces of bronze; the deep caramel color of his chiseled facial feature, neck and arms to the biceps blended into a slightly lighter tan covering the remainder of his upper body. His wide chest was covered in a V-shaped trail of hair that ended at his navel, reminding me of an arrow pointing directly to his…

Oh…my…God!

He chuckled again as he sat on the edge of the bed and stretched. Lordy, darlin’, that was somethin’.

What was? I thought in sheer terror. Umm, Mr. Miller…

Yes’um, Missus Miller?

I couldn’t have. I wouldn’t have. My friends would’ve stopped me from doing anything so stupid. Look, this is a bit out of character for me.

He just grinned. I reckon so. Not every day you go marrying somebody in the middle of the night.

Marriage. The word sent a wave of terror through my whole body as I recalled the night’s events. We got married last night.

Darlin’, ya a’right? Ya look a might pale.

I sat down on the bed to keep from falling. I don’t know. I feel sick.

I’ll get ya somethin’. He bolted to his feet and rushed out the room. When he returned he was carrying a glass of water. Sorry, darlin’. Fresh outta aspirin.

My hands were trembling as I took the glass and gulped it down quickly. When I finished, I handed him the glass and somehow forced a smile, finally remembering his first name. Dusty?

He knelt down in front of me and took my hands. Yes, darlin’?

I think… That is to say… I stared at our hands together. His large hands holding mine; surrounding them as only hands as large and tender as his could. His brow was knit together in a concerned frown as he looked up at me with those eyes that saw everything. Dammit, Dusty. Why are you so handsome?

He smiled. Thank ya, darlin’.

This is so hard. I sighed, trying to think of the right words. Last night, when we met at the bar, I got pretty drunk. I don’t usually do that.

He nodded understandingly. Don’t worry, darlin’. We both got pretty drunk.

This marriage- Is a mistake, my mind screamed. The biggest mistake of my life and needs to be annulled right away. Are you sure we did right? I mean, we weren’t exactly in a state to make life changing decisions.

He shrugged. Probably not, but the Good Lord has His reasons for everything.

Yeah. Well, this is going just swimmingly, I thought as I trudged forward. Dusty, do you think we might have made a mistake?

He thought for a moment. Dunno, darlin’. Maybe. I reckon we just gotta play the hand we been dealt.

This is getting me nowhere fast. Is this what you really want, Dusty? To be married to a stranger?

He smiled and shook his head. Granted, it ain’t the way I would’ve done it, but what’s done is done. He narrowed his eyes. ’Less you’re having second thoughts.

I didn’t say anything.

Darlin’?

Looking in his eyes, I was realized they were blue; a steely blue that was gentle, kind, trusting and just a hint of sad. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he thought what we’d done was the right thing, regardless of how we went about getting it done. He wasn’t the type to question the logic and he didn’t wonder about what might go wrong. All he considered was that we had made a promise and he was willing to put everything he had into keeping that promise.

I shoved him playfully and smiled. You’re such a cowboy.

He smiled as he put his hand on the back of my head and gently rested our foreheads together. Yes, ma’am. I am.

I pulled away and fell backwards on the bed. All right. So, we’re married. You know this is crazy, right?

He smiled and eased up beside me on the bed. Yep.

And there are a million reasons why this can’t work.

He slid the blanket down my body, exposing my body to the waist. Yep.

And I can think of at least a million things you’re not going to like about me.

He kissed my shoulder. Such as?

I closed my eyes. I can’t cook.

He slid his hand under the blanket. All right.

I don’t like to… My pulse began to race as he played my body like a violin and I fought against the moan that welled up in my throat. …Clean.

All right. He lowered his mouth to my breast. Slowly, almost painfully, he circled my nipple with his tongue. What else?

My mind went blank and I involuntarily arched my back to meet his touch. My God, Dusty.

Tell me what I’m gonna hate about you, darlin’? He began a slow decent down my body with his mouth, touching every inch of exposed flesh.

Don’t stop, I pleaded.

He rested his chin on my stomach and left out a growling laugh. What else?

I… I couldn’t think anymore, much less speak. After a few seconds, I managed a coherent thought. I have a dog.

Bring ‘im here. He continued his decent.

And an… apartment.

All right. He flicked his tongue across me, sending me into a mindless frenzy. He stopped suddenly. You gonna live there?

I opened my eyes and looked down at him. He was grinning from ear to ear. Oh, just shut-up, Dusty.

Yes, ma’am.

Chapter 2

Cowboys, Kate! Susan, one of my two best friends, repeated for the third time in a shrill voice. Real cowboys. It’ll be so much fun.

The evening I married Dusty, I had no intention of meeting a man, let alone ending up with one for the rest of my life.

I don’t know, Sue. I leaned against her bathroom counter and adjusted my tank top in the mirror. It’s only been a month since Andre and I broke up.

Yes, yes. And we’ve suffered alongside you for the past month too. Now, will you forget about him? She rolled her eyes. C’mon. Holly said this place is great. We have to go. It’ll be fun.

Holly shrugged as she looked at herself in the mirror beside Susan and me. It’s all right. Taco and the boys might be there tonight too.

Oh, the elusive Taco. Susan rolled her eyes. Are we finally going to get to meet the beefy burrito guy?

Holly’s cheeks turned a delicate shade of pink. Maybe. If he’s there.

Susan laughed. Oh we have to go now, Kate. Consider it intelligence gathering on the nacho.

Holly suddenly turned a deep shade of red. We don’t have to go if you don’t want to, Kate.

I smiled at Holly just because she was the sweetest person I’ve ever met even when she played it up like she did that night. You really want to go, don’t you?

She grinned. Yeah.

I sighed. I must be out of my mind, but all right. We’re going.

Looking in the mirror again, I sighed again. The woman staring back at me from the reflection had eyes the color of fresh fields of clover, but they looked old suddenly. It almost didn’t manner that my flat iron had tamed her shoulder length unruly chestnut colored hair for once or that her make-up was perfect.

I thought about Andre again. My handsome, suave junior executive I loved almost as much as he loved the idea of making Vice President by the end of the quarter. When I was with him, I thought I’d finally found a place I belonged.

I still couldn’t forget what happened. His last words to me stung like a fresh rattlesnake bite and were almost as deadly.

You fucking whore! You’re sleeping with him, aren’t you? You’re sleeping with old man Hill. That’s why you got the promotion.

It was the furthest thing from the truth and he knew it. I’d been promoted because my ideas were novel and I worked twice as hard as anyone else. Sleeping my way to the top wasn’t necessary when advertising came naturally to me.

He wouldn’t listen when I tried to explain; as if I needed to excuse myself for being good at what I did. He was just too wrapped up in his career- and the promotion he felt he should’ve gotten- to admit someone could excel without brown nosing. I honestly believed that even the woman he claimed to love was trying to screw him out of what he deserved.

God knows how much I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Even after he tore my heart apart, I would’ve given anything to be close to him again. He was where I felt I belonged. He was home to me.

Where’s home now, Kate? I asked myself as I looked in the mirror in Susan’s bathroom.

I couldn’t answer anymore, though. I didn’t really know. The better part of five years had been spent looking for that elusive place called home and believing I’d found it with Andre. Now, I was lost again; looking for something I was beginning to think didn’t exist.

Someone else is driving tonight, I announced, turning away from my reflection with a forced smile. I want to get so drunk I don’t even know my name.

Susan laughed. That’s the spirit. Oh, this is going to be so much fun. The Three Amigos back together again, wreaking havoc on the lives of single men everywhere. I wonder if we should get tattoos tonight.

I glanced at Holly, wishing I could be a petit blonde with huge doe eyes just like her. I knew Andre would never hurt someone so kind and soft-spoken. Holly dripped honey every time she spoke, but not the phony way most people try to be. Holly was truly a gentle woman that no one could hate.

I then turned to my other friend, Susan. I knew full well Andre would have rather faked his own death than confronted her. She was an Amazon with deep brown hair and sharp blue-green eyes that could turn a grown man into a babbling mound of gelatin. She was what I strived to be; empowered and independent.

Of course, at this point in my life, being anyone else would have been preferred to who I was.

So, Susan demanded impatiently. The tattoos?

Only if Holly’s is a sign on her chest that says ‘this side up for sex,’ I teased.

And yours is going to be a doormat that says ‘Welcome, losers.’ She shot back.

Taking Holly’s car, we drove an hour, turning down a few dark roads until we reached an unpaved one leading to what looking to be a field, but since there was no moon and no street lights, I couldn’t be sure. Finally, the glow of neon lights shined down on what appeared to be red barn. Ten minutes later, the three of us standing in what can only described as the single most country bar I’ve ever seen in my life.

The floors were actually covered in sawdust with the exception of the twenty by twenty hardwood dance floor. Just beyond the dance floor was a bandstand enclosing the worst band I’ve ever heard in my life in chicken wire. The bar had two men behind it, both of whom could’ve been mistaken for bouncers, and the head of a Texas longhorn steer over it. There were several small tables scattered about for good measure and a backroom with four pool tables and a jukebox.

This is a total dive, Susan announced, looking around at the men and women dressed in jeans and Western shirts like Holly’s. What the hell are you thinking coming here, Holly?

Holly blushed. It’s not so bad.

I looked down at my pink tank top, black skirt, and high heels. Saying I felt completely out of my element would’ve been just the beginning on my discomfort levels. I was lost as a goose.

Susan swaggered over to the bar in her black halter top, crimson leather pants and spiked knee-high boots. I heard her order us martinis, but made her way to the table Holly and I had commandeered with three beers in her hands.

Catching the eye of every man in the bar, she shrugged and declared, Well, tonight might not be totally lost. There are a few cowboys I’d like to ride tonight.

I waved off the beer Susan set in the middle of the table. Not tonight. I need something stronger.

Suit yourself. She sat down one then took the others and carried them over to a man with a receding hairline and struck up a conversation.

Guess it’s just us, I said to Holly.

Taco! She shouted leaping from the table and rushing over to a group of men coming in before disappeared into the crowd.

Staring at the abandoned beer that was my only remaining companion, I felt alone in the crowded bar. I picked it up and focused all my attention on peeling the label off. Halfway through, a soft thud on the table caused me to lift my eyes.

Pardon me for saying so, ma’am, but you look like you could use a friend right about now.

Across from me a man in a white Stetson, matching button down long sleeve shirt and black wranglers sat down with a bottle of unmarked amber liquor and two glasses. His blue eyes shined as he pushed one of the glasses to me and poured a round.

I stared at him for a moment, taking him in fully. Even in the darkened bar, I could see a slight amount of deep auburn hair escaping under the brim. As he leaned forward and took a long drink, I could see his face was bronzed from hours in the sun; the tiny lines around his mouth and eyes more pronounced because of the tan.

From the way he was sitting, I could tell he was a tall man, but when he was seated it was hard to determine how tall. Adding to the impression of size was his wide chest, which was only slightly less defined under his shirt than that of a body builder’s.

As attractive as he was, what drew my attention the most were his hands. They were large hands with calluses; not the hands of a man who spent his days behind a desk. These were the hands of a working man who earned his living through sweat and labor. Without even knowing him, I felt I would like him as a person, even if he wasn’t really my type.

I smiled politely. I’m sorry, but my friends are sitting there.

That a fact? He looked up as Holly and a blonde haired man with a hawk nose and brown eyes came to join us. How are you, Holly-girl?

Dusty! She hugged his neck. Haven’t seen you out in a month of Sundays.

He nodded. Don’t get much chance these days. Wouldn’t be here at all if Taco hadn’t drug me kicking and screaming.

She laughed as she wrapped herself around the blonde’s arm. Well, it’s good seeing you. Have you met my friend Kate?

He turned to me; his blue eyes locked on mine, and tipped his hat in quick fluid movement. Pleasure, Miss Katie.

Lowering my eyes demurely, more out of fear of what those blue eyes might see than shyness. Likewise, Mr.-

Dusty laughed a full, husky laugh that made my insides weak. I ain’t never been called Mr. anything, Miss Katie. My full name’s Dusty Miller, but you can just call me Dusty.

When the band started playing a Diamond Rio song, Taco leaned over to Holly and whispered something that made her giggle. She turned to me and smiled. You mind if I go dance a little? I won’t be gone long.

I shook my head. Go. Have fun. I’ll be here for a while.

Thanks, Kate.

When they were gone, Dusty pushed the glass closer to me.

So? He said, the word lingering on his lips for what seemed like months. Kate short for something?

I cringed a little then nodded. Katherine. Katherine O’Hara.

He chuckled. O’Hara?

Yeah. My mom’s little joke. She always wanted a Katie O’Hara. Thank God I didn’t have black hair or she would’ve named me Scarlet.

Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss Katie. Silence fell over us. It only took me a moment to realize he was studying me over the rim of his glass. His blue eyes dissected me; seeing everything about me. Mind if I ask you something, ma’am?

Thankful for anything that would end the deafening silence, I shook my head. Not at all, Mr. Miller.

Why ya alone?

I drew back a little and lowered my eyes, ashamed of how needy I must have seemed. I fumbled with an excuse, I’m sorry, Mr. Miller. I didn’t mean to… It’s just… You see… Well, that it…

He smiled reassuringly. No need explaining, Miss Katie. I was just wondering. Pretty lady like you shouldn’t be sitting here all alone ‘less she’s gettin’ over somethin’.

Finding my composure, I stiffened and narrowed my eyes. I’m sorry, Mr. Miller. I don’t make it a habit if dumping my problems on strangers.

With all due respect, ma’am, we ain’t strangers no more. He smiled as he inched the glass closer to me. Drink?

I looked down at the glass then back up at him. You don’t seem like the type that needs to get a woman drunk, Mr. Miller.

He shook his head with a smile. Just hate drinking alone, Miss Katie. ‘Sides, you got that look again. The one you had when I walked up.

What look would that be?

He raised an eyebrow and gave me the most devilish corner mouth grin any man could muster. Like you need a drink or two.

Maybe I do. I took the glass and drank it down quickly. It set fire to my chest, choking me. What the heck is that?

The good stuff. He took a long drink and refilled our glasses as the band played Baby’s Gotten Good at Good-bye. I hate this damn song.

I nodded. Me too.

Sounds like ya been through it. When I nodded, he sat for a moment studying me over the rim of his glass. Can’t figure why anybody’d walk away from a pretty lady like you.

I finished my glass and let him pour me another. The alcohol was already making me bold and blunt. Well, thank you for the compliment, Mr. Miller, but I assure you I’m perfectly fine about my former relationship.

He shrugged as he finished his glass. If you say so.

What’s that supposed to mean? I gestured at the bottle.

He poured another round. I’m just glad you ain’t hurting.

I smirked. And what difference would it make if I was?

Well then, I think whoever did should have his ass handed to him. He swallowed his drink down in one gulp. Pardon my French. I just think a lady’s not supposed to cry for nothing in the world and any man who’d let that happen is a damn fool. He lowered his eyes. Least that’s the way I see it.

I stared at him gape-mouth, not really believing him but knowing in my heart he meant every word. I looked away from him long enough to glance at the bottom of my empty glass.

Pour me another, Mr. Miller, and I’ll tell you all about the guy I’m crying over. His name’s Andre.

He smiled and poured us both another round. For the next hour, I told him about my relationship with Andre and how I’d love him with all my heart and how I thought I’d finally found the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with only to have my heart broken. When I finished my words were slurred but my heart didn’t hurt anymore.

I looked up at Dusty and said, "This isn’t going to make any sense, but in my darkest hours I’ve always had one thought. I always thought much I wanted to go home.

Not home as in a place. It’s not any place on a map or anything. It’s here- I pointed to my heart. "When I was with Andre, I thought I’d found home. I know I didn’t really, but I wanted him to be home for me.

I guess that’s why it hurts so badly now. I have to admit to myself that he wasn’t where I was supposed to me. Where I belong. I stared at Dusty, hoping he’d understand but sure he couldn’t. Do you know what I mean about the whole abstract concept of home, Mr. Miller? Does it make any sense at all? Am I the only person in the world that feels that way?

He shook his head. No, darlin’. You ain’t.

I stared down the empty glass then at the bottle we’d managed to finish off too. Can I ask you something, Mr. Miller?

He nodded as the band took a break and Riding for a Fall began to play on the jukebox.

Do you like Chris LeDoux?

He smiled as he stood and took my hand in his. Without a word, he led me to the dance floor and held me in his arms with a tenderness that made me feel like I was made of glass. Slowly, we moved along the dance floor with a dozen other couples. In our drunken state, neither of us had any rhythm, but at that moment in his arms seemed like the only place in the world I was meant to be.

This feels good, I whispered as I laid my head against his chest.

He pulled me closer. Yep.

Nice.

Yep.

Safe.

Yep. He stared at me with those blue eyes glazed but intense. Like home.

Just like home. I slid my fingers under his Stetson and played with his hair. Are we drunk, Mr. Miller?

He nodded as he licked his lips. I reckon we are.

Maybe you should take me home.

His shoulders shagged a little, but he nodded. Yes, ma’am. That’d be best.

I smiled. I meant your home.

Darlin’, I ain’t gonna tell you no, but I don’t want you regretting tonight. He lowered his face to mine. I wanna make you mine, Miss Katie. All mine.

I laughed lightly and nipped at his lower lip. I won’t say no to anything you suggest.

Ma’am, the only way I’d have you is if I made you my woman. His breathing was ragged suddenly, like he’d been riding hard for days. And I don’t think either of us is in any state for that just this moment.

I shrugged. So make me yours. Let’s go wake up some old judge and get him to marry us.

Dusty laughed. That’d be a dang fool thing to do, Miss Katie.

Yeah, it would. So, let’s do it.

He stared at me in that stony, thoughtful manner he did most of his thinking. Miss Katie, that’s about the craziest thing I ever heard.

Are you saying you don’t want to?

He smiled. Nope. Just wanna be sure it’s what you really want, Miss Katie. Marriage is forever.

I looked at my watch. It’s one-thirty right now. I don’t have any plans for the rest of my life. Do you?

No, ma’am.

So, let’s go get married.

Taco! He bellowed. He smiled down at me and whispered, You make me wanna be crazy, Kate.

Yeah, Boss? Taco asked as he seemed to appear out of nowhere with Holly still beside him.

Dusty’s eyes never left mine. Get the truck.

Now, Boss?

Miss Kate?

I nodded. I’m sure.

Now.

Excuse me, Dusty, Holly interjected, stepping between us as she grabbed my arm at the elbow and hauled me in the general direction of the restroom. I just need to talk to Kate for one minute.

The smell of stale beer and urine made my stomach flip. The restroom had four individual stalls shoved into the concrete walls like they were under arrest. The only privacy in the privy was the thin pressed wood walls that came down almost to an average woman’s calf. They had been painted white at one time but had since yellowed from years of disrepair and cigarette smoke. The three sinks had been white as well, but were incased in a thick coating of filth around the rim turning them several shades of black.

Don’t try and stop me, Holls, I said, checking out my reflection in one of the hazy shined steel that passed for a mirror and trying to ignoring Holly’s disapproving eyes. The room was tilting slightly and I leaned a little to adjust for the spin on the earth. I’m going home with Dusty Miller.

Kate, you’re not in any state to be making decisions like that. She wrung her hands and paced between the stalls and sinks. This is so bad.

Oh, will you pipe down, Holly. Susan, who must have seen us and followed, stood in the mirror next to me. She rolled her eyes with a groan. Kate’s a grown woman. She can make her own decisions.

Thank you. I adjusted my tank top and started out the door. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go get married.

What! They yelled in unison and pulled