Rock Star's Ballad: White Mist Series, #3

Prologue

Demi refused to meet her father’s eyes as she took the seat in front of his desk. She couldn’t imagine why he called her to his office. There was always work to be done at the executive offices of Ashton Hotels. She did everything perfectly so there would be no reason to talk to him. She managed to avoid him for the past two weeks.

I don’t like the way you’re acting.

That made her eyes lift to meet his hard gaze. Her father was a tall, imposing man who had impeccable manners and a keen business sense. He was respected in business circles and beloved by his employees for having fantastic benefits. It was well known that he was a family man. No one was surprised when Demi got involved with Ashton Hotel, which had been run by their family for generations. It was a small hotel, but had a great location a block from Times Square.

I haven’t done anything, Demi said quietly and resisted the urge to twist her hands together in her lap.

You’re quiet, he said in an accusing tone.

Demi said nothing and just waited.

You have a future, a legacy to uphold, he said and gestured around the grand office.

I know my duty, Demi said with quiet dignity.

He glared at her. You need to get over him.

Demi tensed and tried to tamp down emotions that rose to choke her. Her nose stung with tears and she looked away from her dad’s intent gaze.

I never should have let you date him, he muttered.

Her eyes whipped back to his and she found her voice. I’m nineteen!

And you want to date a wannabe rock star? His face twisted in disgust.

His songs are on the radio. He isn’t a wannabe!

Her father flicked a dismissive hand. He’s chasing fame. He’s going to end up like his parents—in the press for drugs and stupid antics. Do you want to be associated with bad press?

Demi wanted to clap her hands over her ears. Her father had been saying this for nearly two years. It didn’t matter that Johnny wasn’t like his parents, her father didn’t want to believe that he was different. He’s gone, Dad, she said quietly. Pain filtered through her. She closed her eyes and tried to bottle it up inside of her.

And you’re moping around the office with bloodshot eyes, her father rapped out. It’s embarrassing. Floyd tells me you don’t take lunch breaks.

Demi stared down at her hands, which trembled. I have a lot to do.

We all have a lot to do. That doesn’t mean you should stop eating.

I’ll eat, she said shortly and scooted to the edge of her seat. Is that it?

No.

Her back was ramrod straight. She tried to appear unaffected. She was brought up in the public eye and well versed in keeping her emotions in check, until now. Please, leave me alone, she silently pleaded.

Have you spoken to him?

She blinked hastily as tears filled her eyes. No.

He was in the papers this morning. He had a wild party last night after a show.

She said nothing, too focused on surviving this interrogation to speak.

I want what’s best for you and—

Demi wasn’t aware of leaping to her feet, but a sharp jolt went through her hand as it hit his desk. Her mouth opened without her permission and she shouted, I gave him up! What more do you want?

There was a beat of silence. She couldn’t see past the tears. She heard something crash to the floor outside. In a dim part of her mind, she knew his secretary could hear them, but she was past caring. She was being torn apart inside and didn’t need her father prodding the ragged holes in her chest.

I want you to be happy that he’s gone! he spat.

She shook her head. I can’t.

You can’t what?

I can’t be happy he’s gone, she whispered and stood trembling in front of his desk with tears pouring down her cheeks. The dam was broken and she didn’t know how to stop it.

He’s no good for you, Demi. One day, you’re going to take my place. Johnny will never settle down. If he succeeds, he’ll have money, fame and his pick of women. You won’t be able to keep an eye on him. Is that the kind of life you want?

Demi dropped her head in a poor attempt to hide her face. It wasn’t the life she wanted, but… She needed Johnny. It was a fact that haunted her for the past two weeks. She felt as if she were half alive. The only thing that got her through the day was a strict schedule, which included going to the office every day after class.

I love him. The confession slipped from her mouth in a broken whisper. She raised her hands to cover her face, which twisted in agony. A sob escaped and she backed towards the door. I need to go home.

Demi—

No! she choked. I did what you wanted. I broke up with him. You need to give me time.

You’ll get over him. You’re so young—

She regained a modicum of pride and turned back to him. Just because I’m young doesn’t mean I don’t know what I feel.

Demi walked out of his office and didn’t look at his secretary. She snatched her purse, put on her sunglasses and walked out of the hotel, ignoring those who called out to her. Tears streamed steadily from beneath her lenses. By the time she walked into her parent’s penthouse, she could barely talk. The elevators opened. Her brothers and sisters screamed her name and threw themselves at her. Demi lost herself in the smell of crayons, peanut butter and sweet-smelling shampoo. There was a huge gap between her and her siblings. The second oldest was Teddy and he was eight. Her parents had a hard time conceiving after she was born and waited a long time to have the rest of the kids her mother always wanted.

Demi? Her mom came around the corner and stopped when she caught sight of Demi’s wet cheeks. What happened?

The kids stopped talking and looked up at her.

Are you crying? Is it because of Johnny? her sister asked, the knowledge in her eyes wise beyond her years.

Demi detached herself from them and went to her bedroom. She needed someplace to scream, cry and sleep. Even as she dropped her purse, the chatter of her siblings and mom followed her.

I-I need time, Demi stammered, yanking Kleenex from the box and blowing her streaming nose.

What happened? Mom asked.

Demi flopped on the bed and pulled a pillow over her head in a clear indication that she didn’t want to talk. Her body jostled from side to side as her brothers and sisters jumped on the bed and swarmed over her, oblivious to her need to grieve in peace.

Don’t cry, Demi! Marci said, wrapping her tiny arms around Demi’s neck, nearly choking her. Mom says no one should be alone when they cry.

Demi tossed the pillow and tried to pry her arms off. Marci, I need—

We should call Johnny! Teddy said. He makes Demi laugh.

More tears seeped from Demi’s swollen eyes. She sat up with Marci hanging from her back like a monkey. Braxton, her two-year-old brother plopped himself on her lap. She wrapped her arms around him as he sang the Hot Dog song from Mickey Mouse. Her misery clashed horribly with the excited, loving voices around her.

What happened? Mom asked so gently that Demi let out a keening sound and buried her face in Braxton’s hair.

Her sister’s pat her on the head while Teddy shuffled his feet uncomfortably. Braxton sang the Hot Dog song louder. Demi let out a hiccupping laugh and wiped her eyes. Teddy tossed her a ball of tissues that she used to mop up her face.

Dad and I got into it, Demi said hoarsely and wrapped her arms around Braxton. He wants me to get over Johnny. I c-can’t act as if he was never a part of my life!

Dad’s worried about you, Mom said. You’re usually so happy and now you’re…

It’s only been two weeks. I need time to— She shook her head and rubbed her hand over her chest. I don’t know if I can get over him.

Her mom didn’t comment, but just watched her with maternal understanding.

Demi drew in a ragged breath. I know we don’t make sense, but Johnny makes me happy. She looked around her room, which was filled with reminders of him—fresh guitar strings, crumpled balls of lyrics he would never use and peppermints scattered over her dresser. It was his favorite candy. Her first kiss was filled with that distinct taste. Dad wants me to run the Ashton Hotel and I will, but… She shook her head. I don’t know if I can live without him.

Demi watched her sisters’ parade in her heels. Under other circumstances, she would have told them to be careful, but she was too tired. Teddy turned on her computer to play chess. He was their father’s mini me. Even when she took over the Ashton Hotel, it would only be a temporary burden since Teddy would take the reins when he was ready. Demi didn’t want to be responsible for hundreds of employees, be in the public eye or spend her night’s making polite chit chat with business associates. She did it now because she was the oldest.

How long does it take? Demi asked her mother. How long will it take for the pain to go away?

If you really love him, it won’t fade, she said.

I don’t know what to do, Demi whispered.

Braxton knelt in front of her and clasped her face between his small hands. He would grow up to be a charmer. He was easygoing and affectionate. Braxton would work for Teddy one day, but his mind would be on an adventure instead of business. Teddy would keep him in line, though. Her sisters would probably work there as well until they got married to businessmen and became like their mother who shied away from the spotlight and gave them a strong sense of family and love. Demi wanted to be somewhere in the middle.

Has he called? Mom asked.

No. She cringed every time she remembered the angry words he hurled at her and the pain shining in his eyes. She’d been Johnny’s support system since high school. When everyone else mocked him, she stood by his side and believed he would be everything he wanted to be and more. Johnny was becoming who he was meant to be, a star on the rise.

She and Johnny never made sense from the moment he asked her out the day he graduated from high school. Johnny was a driven music artist and wrote obsessively. A song he wrote in her bedroom a year ago now played on the radio every hour. In the past months, it was rare for him to stay longer than a weekend. She always knew that he would make it, she just didn’t expect it so soon.

They were walking on different paths and her father’s relentless lectures and nagging finally girded her to break up with Johnny. Over the past two years, Johnny gained a loyal following. She saw pictures of him with fans and tried not to let it bother her, but… Where could their relationship go? She was about to begin her second year in college. When she graduated with her business degree, then what? She would be stuck in New York, working for her father and Johnny would be on the road, selling out arenas all over the world. Demi agreed with her dad and couldn’t see how they could continue a long-distance relationship. It was better to stop it from going further, but… She didn’t realize that by breaking up with Johnny that a part of her would die in the process.

Love, love, Demi, Braxton said solemnly, staring up at her with the trademark Ashton eyes.

Demi kissed Braxton on the mouth. I love you too, Brax.

He scooted off the bed and tugged on Teddy’s arm, trying to persuade his brother to watch a movie with him. Teddy declined, intent on the chess game. Not to be denied, Braxton began to drag the chair from the desk so Teddy lost his grip on the mouse.

Demi, you broke up with Johnny because Dad told you to, right? Mom asked.

Demi sighed and rubbed a hand over her aching temples. He’s right, though.

Dad isn’t always right, she countered, surprising Demi.

But, Johnny and I aren’t on the same path. We’re not even living in the same world! He’s becoming what he was born to be—a rock star and I’m… She trailed off and shook her head. I don’t know what I am.

You’re thinking with your head instead of your heart.

Demi frowned. What are you saying?

I love your Dad, but I’ve never seen you so miserable. I saw the way Johnny looked at you.

She believed Johnny loved her until he yelled at her when they were breaking up. He said the worst things—

Her mom waved a hand to capture Demi’s attention. Life is too short to live it filled with regrets. She cupped Demi’s face between her hands. I love you so much. You think like a businesswoman, but you empathize like a mother. I couldn’t wish for a better daughter than you.

Demi gave her a watery smile. I’ve cried too much today. Stop, Mom!

I want you to be happy, she said fiercely and Demi sobered. If you truly love Johnny, don’t let him go.

Demi’s heart beat double time in her chest. She stared into her mom’s eyes, wondering if this was really happening. Her mother always supported her father’s dictates—until now.

Her mother kissed her on the forehead and shushed her siblings out of the room. Demi sat in the middle of her bed, too many thoughts whizzing through her mind. She talked herself into not being able to have Johnny and now her mom was telling her to get him back? Would Johnny want her after she broke up with him? Did he hate her now? Life is too short to live it filled with regrets. She didn’t want anything in life more than she wanted Johnny. She pictured him in her mind and her heart felt as if it was being skewered. Mom was right. If she loved him, he was worth fighting for.

Demi didn’t let herself think. She launched herself into the bathroom, washed her face, changed clothes and walked out of her room with purpose.

Going out? Marci called.

I’m going to see Johnny, Demi said and her mom beamed.

The kids cheered and Demi felt a spear of hope. The weight on her shoulders lightened and she hugged her mom.

Good luck, baby, Mom whispered.

What if Dad—

I’ll take care of Dad. Follow your heart, Demi.

I love you, Mom, Demi said before she blew kisses to the kids and left the penthouse.

Demi caught a cab and twisted her hands together in her lap. Excitement and fear warred within her. Would Johnny be happy or pissed to see her? If she got back together with Johnny, what would her dad say? If he disowned her, would she go on the road with Johnny? If Johnny was at a wild party last night, would he be in his apartment? For the first time in her life, she was doing what she wanted, which made her feel empowered and terrified.

Demi leapt out of the cab and rushed into Johnny’s building. She tapped her shoe impatiently as the elevator climbed and dashed out before the door fully opened. She rushed to Johnny’s apartment and rang the doorbell. She stood there for thirty-seconds and rang it again. Desperate tears pricked her eyes. He had to be here. She had to apologize and tell him she couldn’t live without him and made a huge mistake. What if he didn’t live here anymore? What if—?

The door opened and there he was. Johnny was the same height as her, around five foot eight with a lanky body, shoulder length hair and three hoop earrings on his left ear. His sleepy dark eyes flared wide when he saw her. He wore only a pair of jeans riding low on his hips. He was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. She launched herself at him and he staggered a step back into his apartment.

I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry! she chanted, burying her face against his neck and drawing in the scent of him. I shouldn’t have doubted us, I shouldn’t listen to my dad. I don’t know how this is going to work, but I want to try. I feel like I’m dying without you! I love you so much and I don’t care what obstacles are in our way. We can do this, right? I don’t want to quit Ashton Hotels, but if I have to I will and I’ll go on the road with you.

Demi paused to draw breath and realized that Johnny’s arms weren’t around her, they were still at his sides. A bolt of fear blasted through her. She froze, staring past him at the messy apartment before she eased back. Johnny watched her with a glazed expression. She ran her hand over the bristles on his cheek and willed him to say something, but he was silent. Something in his eyes made her take a step back into the hallway.

Johnny? she whispered and was about to say more when a woman appeared behind him. The woman didn’t have on a stitch of clothing. She was covered in colorful tattoos and her bleach blonde hair was mussed and tangled. No one could misinterpret what Demi interrupted. Demi’s body locked as the woman wrapped her arms around Johnny from behind and pressed against him suggestively.

Who’s this, baby? the woman cooed to Johnny.

Neither Johnny nor Demi spoke. Their eyes were glued to each other. It was Demi’s worst fears in the flesh. Bile rose in her throat and she took a step back, hand raised as if that would block what she was seeing.

Did you bring a wedding gift? the woman asked.

Demi’s heart stuttered in her chest. Wedding gift?

The woman moved the hand splayed possessively on Johnny’s abs and Demi saw the massive diamond ring there. Blessed numbness encompassed Demi. She looked from the ring to Johnny’s blank face.

We got married last night, the woman said helpfully and made a moaning sound as she tightened her grip on Johnny.

Demi moved her eyes from the woman pawing her ex to Johnny who was completely expressionless. Congratulations. She was proud that her voice sounded even. She wasn’t sure what her face looked like, though, because she didn’t feel anything.

Her feet carried her to the elevator, which opened as she approached. People filtered out and she stepped inside. She stared straight ahead, submerged in such a state of shock that her mind was a complete blank. Demi walked out of Johnny’s apartment building and didn’t hail a cab. Instead, she just walked. She found herself in Central Park and sat on a bench, staring sightlessly ahead.

Johnny got over their two-year relationship in two weeks. That thought was uppermost in her mind. The second was the woman he made his wife—blonde and skinny as a rail with tattoos all over her body. She and Demi couldn’t be more different. Apparently, that was what he wanted all along and now he had it. Night fell. Demi didn’t want to go home. She didn’t want to tell her mom what happened. She took a risk and made an absolute fool of herself. Follow her heart? She would never do such a stupid thing again. Demi refused to cry. The image of Johnny and that woman replayed over and over in her head. She actually hugged him after he’d been in bed with that woman, touching, kissing and—Demi bent over, head between her knees as she fought the urge to vomit.

Lady, you okay?

Demi took a deep breath and sat up. A cop stood a few feet away, watching her closely in the dim light. Demi swallowed hard and nodded.

You shouldn’t be out here alone, he said. It’s late. Go home.

Demi got to her feet with a hand over her roiling stomach and forced herself to walk. She left home without her cell. Her mom was probably freaking out. She walked to her building and rode the elevator, leaning against the walls because she felt sick,