Soul Comfort: Uplifting Insights Into the Nature of Grief, Death, Consciousness and Love for Transformation
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About this ebook
Alistair Conwell
Alistair Conwell was born in India and grew up in Australia. He has two psychology degrees and has travelled widely. His books and articles on spirituality have been published internationally.
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Soul Comfort - Alistair Conwell
(1914–1953)
Preface
Most people believe that death and taxes are the only certainties in life. But there is a third certainty – grief. Grief is equally certain because it always follows the death of a loved one’s physical body and will even begin if you know that their death, or indeed the death of your own body, is imminent as a result of age, illness or a traumatic event.
Grief is a normal, instinctive emotional response to loss or impending loss. Every day we experience a range of emotions depending on what events occur in our lives. In life’s emotional and spiritual journey, there is indeed a deceptively fine line between pleasure and pain. For love is the pleasure of souls and grief is the pain of love.
Grief is a complex emotion that changes whoever it touches. The changes can be profound or quite subtle, conscious or unconscious, rapid or slow yet the experience of grief changes you or at the very least begins a change process. Embracing the change is key for your healing and positive transformation.
Whether or not the death of your loved one’s physical body occurs unexpectedly, there is always a sense of disbelief and shock (and a range of other emotions) when the death actually occurs. Each of us will grieve differently as we process and try to deal with all the everyday implications of the loss. To find that someone deeply loved is no longer physically present is difficult, indeed some of us may find impossible, to accept. You may have thoughts that your loved one will physically present themselves at any moment. And you will yearn to just touch them and hold them in your arms again. You may feel that you lose a part of yourself or that there is a feeling of something missing – a gaping immeasurable Grand Canyon of emptiness, pushed into your life. There is always pain, sometimes it is physical, and there is always an indescribable sorrow. And you may wonder how others can go about their daily activities as if nothing has happened while your world has been shattered and seemingly stopped.
Although there is a widely-held view that achieving a ‘sense of closure’ or the passage of time extricates you from the grip of grief, mental health professionals are finding that for many people the grieving process never really ends no matter how much time passes or even if there is a ‘sense of closure’. The grief you experience may change over time but that does not mean that the grieving process necessarily ceases.
The grieving process is like being alone in a vast ocean. You will find there are places in that ocean where it is so deep that it cannot be plumbed while elsewhere there are shallows. In some places, there are high surging swells, and there are other places where the surface is calm and smooth. Some days you will find yourself wading in calm shallow waters and on other days struggling in deep rough seas. But each of us has the natural ability to float, and no matter where in that vast ocean of grief you find yourself, take comfort knowing that the arms of the soul will not allow you to sink below the water’s