One Moment in Time

Within is a novel that focuses on two characters, Madison Wolff and Jack Loughlin. In this country, there is a need to hold someone accountable for the horrors that afflict society, specifically what we see as an act of terrorism. Oftentimes we prejudge, and while we might be right, we might also be wrong.

In condemning a person before the whole story can be revealed, we have shown the world that fear can rule us. Fear is, by far, one of the most dangerous emotions and we rely on it far too often when our emotions are involved. While reading this story, focus on the little details about the characters – read them, learn about them, and understand their story. You might find that, even in the darkest depths of humanity – that we are all still human…

Attacks are splashed on page one – retractions are buried on page thirty.

Prologue

It was a cool day in Simi Valley, which was entirely unusual. It was as if the weather knew that Jack was going to be spending the weekend, nestled away on Big Bear Mountain, for an autumn retreat with his best friend, and it was preparing him beforehand. It was a nice thought, at least.

Jack ran a hand through his medium-length blonde hair, tilting his head back a little to let the sun wash over him when it peeked through the clouds. His eyes fluttered open, a cool, crystal blue that took in the cloudy sky through his window. The sound of a loud, large truck pulling up was enough to get him moving. He knelt down and picked up his duffle bag, grateful for his weekly workouts with his friends. He was healthy and able, and it was those precious trips to the gym where he was able to see his friends, now that most of his time was spent studying or working. He wasn’t even surprised that his hand had a mild tremor to it, not after all this time.

Jack Loughlin stepped out into the cool air, stretching his arms out behind him while he arched his back and let out a soft yawn. It was far too early in the morning, but they’d be beating loads of traffic by leaving this early. And he knew that, aside from typical traffic in the Los Angeles metropolitan area, today would be busier than normal. Those who could would be heading out to San Bernardino for the last of Carter Rollins’ seminars before his annual retreat for his most notable contributors and avid followers, as well as those who were lucky enough to be invited.

Three days prior, Jack had been surprised to find an invitation – handwritten no less – to this retreat and after years of following Carter’s circuit, he’d finally gotten lucky. He’d finally been invited! And, to his immense surprise, that invitation had extended to a friend, too. It was why he now walked towards his best friend, Brad Cooley, who sat on the edge of the bed, loaded with camping gear, watching and waiting for Jack with a wide grin.

Together they were going to affect real change and help to identify those individuals who’d already done so. This retreat wasn’t just a reward; it was the final staging area for all of the charitable donations that had been collected throughout the year, and now they would would recognize those individuals – teachers – who had shown exemplary goodwill. It was something people looked forward to all year round, the ability to show those who worked the hardest with the least amount of attention the recognition that they deserved.

This year, Jack was going to be able to help. It was… exhilarating, and he couldn’t wait to get there and start helping out. Delivering the goodwill baskets was one of the kindest things that the Rollins’ Recognition Foundation did all year. To be a part of a group that could so dramatically alter somebody’s life wasn’t just a dream, it was a goal. To help those who helped others was his goal, and for the first time, he was going to be able to do just that.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this giddy about something, Brad grinned, looking Jack over like he was seeing him for the first time. Jack had a feeling that his friend was because, for the first time in a long time, he felt like a brand new person. Someone who had a purpose in life, to help those who needed it to see the truth. To have their eyes opened to it.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy before, Jack replied before throwing his tremor-free hand up for a high-five. Brad chuckled and shook his head, but he returned the high five without any hesitation. Brad Cooley had been his friend for years, since before he could remember. Jack took in the stubble-laden face that was somewhat pockmarked, too, and grinned. His greasy black hair and big, round brown eyes were a familiarly welcomed sight, and Jack couldn’t think of another person that he would want to take this last journey with. Brad was his best friend. If he couldn’t understand, then nobody could. Now, come on. Let’s get on the road before we’re stuck in traffic.

You don’t have to tell me twice, Brad said with a silly grin before he pushed himself off of the bed of his truck and closed it up tight. He strode around the front of his truck while Jack lingered a moment longer to put his bag in the back. He doubted if he would get to use most of his outdoor gear at first, but definitely later after it all started. The truck was bright red with black lightning on it, and for as long as Jack had known Brad, the man had loved his truck. Jack’s smile was a little hesitant when he walked around the car and opened the passenger side door, but Brad was far too consumed with starting up the truck to notice, and when he did look Jack’s way, Jack was all smiles.

It was only tugging on him when he thought about it. He supposed that was why they had been warned not to overthink everything. That way they weren’t bogged down in what wasn’t important or relevant. Doing so proved to be a little more difficult than first anticipated, but he understood why. The people did need to wake up and open their eyes, and Carter Rollins was helping to do that.

Not just by recognizing those whose efforts were never actually talked about, but by taking real true action. After this weekend, everyone would be awake and aware, and it would all be because of Carter’s great sacrifice. He would be lauded a hero.

Jack just knew it.

So, is he having any guest speaker’s this year? Brad asked, and from his tone, Jack had a feeling that this wasn’t the first time he had tried to get Jack’s attention. He was grinning over at Jack, however, so Jack quickly shook his head and took a breath before reaching into his back pocket. He’d stuffed the invitation there, and when he pulled out the crumpled piece of paper and scanned it, he furrowed his brow and gave a lopsided smile.

It looks like it’s just the typical crowd, Jack said before he looked over at Brad. Dr. Quinn Breslin’s going to be there, his face brightening. Dr. Breslin was one of Carter Rollins’ most notable supporters. She’d been there from the beginning as his personal therapist when his son was KIA. Now the woman helped him reach out to veterans, their families, and worst of all, those who had lost so much. It was through her help that his program of gift baskets for the most exemplary teachers who had gone out of their way had become a runaway success. Jack supposed it wasn’t surprising that she would be there, and why Brad’s reaction was less than enthused.

I guess that makes sense, Brad murmured, his grip on the wheel a little tighter than normal. Jack’s brow raised in question, and he simply chuckled and shook his head. No, it’s just I always feel like she’s sizing me up for something when I see her on television at one of these things. Actually seeing her in person… I can only imagine what it will feel like to have that scrutinizing gaze on me.

Funny, Jack said under his breath, stroking his chin in thought. I always feel at ease when I’m around her. Jack shrugged and leaned back into his seat. He couldn’t expect Brad to bend over backward for every little thing that was involved with the Foundation. That would be ludicrous, and Jack absolutely hated being ludicrous. It’s fine, Jack went on with a small smile, then he delved back into the guest list.

Erica Carmichael’s speaking for CM Corp, he said while he glanced down at the Notable Donors section. It was always filled with society people who either helped out in person or by helping to fund one of the Foundation’s many charities and goodwill missions. CM Corp had helped to fund three of the last five recognition missions. They were always at the beginning of the school year, and the kids always got a kick out of the goodies they were given.

Jack shivered but quickly stifled the feeling before it became visible on his face or his body language. Brad flicked the turn signal and came to a slow halt, looking both ways while he changed the radio to something a bit more palatable for the both of them. Jack glanced out through his window and rolled it down a bit to let the early morning breeze flow over his face. It burned, somewhat, but it was a nice sensation. It woke him up, so when he rolled the window down and settled back into his seat, he was prepared. As prepared as he could be.

Brad pulled forward and turned down the street.

Taking in the large amphitheater in San Bernardino felt strangely different this time than it had any of the other times he had been there. The parking lot was packed with cars, and people of all types meandered through the line that was streaming in through the doors. It was loud outside, and more than once someone asked him a question before falling into conversation with those around them as if they had all known one another for a long time. Certainly some people had known one another for years. Many of those who were at this particular seminar had been coming here for a long time, after all. Some of them would even be heading on up to Big Bear afterward for the private retreat that would lead into the recognition missions.

It was… awe-inspiring. To have this many people drop everything to recognize somebody they didn’t even know. Those who had lost family members to the wars or terrorist attacks, those who put everything aside in order to educate our future, those who tended to the sick and injured. They were all recognized throughout the year during the Rollins’ trek throughout the country, and this was the event of the year for their entire organization. To be a part of it, even if this were his only chance, was exciting.

The stage was large – it had to be for the thousands of spectators who now filled the amphitheater to capacity. Cameras were pointed towards the stage and towards the crowds, ready to catch their reaction. It was a spectacle, but then sometimes people needed a spectacle in order to open their eyes to what was really going on around them.

Damn, I guess I didn’t realize how many people they stuffed into these things, Brad whispered under his breath, close to Jack’s ear. He leaned back and looked around himself to take everything in. The lights were already starting to dim, turning those furthest away from Jack into little more than distinguished silhouettes that soon became interchangeable. There was a wash of silence over the crowd, and then an explosion of applause thundered throughout the amphitheater. It drowned out the rest of Brad’s comments, and soon Jack was joining in on the applause before Carter Rollins ambled out onto the stage in his plaid shirt and jean pants.

He was a down-to-earth guy, and that was why he appealed to so many of them. He was a regular guy they could all relate to. The kind of guy you could sit down and drink a beer with. It only served to remind Jack that he had done so. It was why he had been invited to the retreat after the seminar, and Jack had a feeling that they would do more than simply drink a beer together. So much had to be gone over, after all, and a clear head was a necessity. How could one possibly keep their eyes open if they were weighed down by drink? He was a simple man, with plain brown hair that was usually left alone. Up there, through the large televisions which displayed everything on stage so that everyone could enjoy the show from the comfort of their chairs, it was evident that the man had a five o’clock shadow. It was so early, though, that Jack didn’t really care. Carter’s gaze swept out across them again, taking them in through simple brown eyes which were set above full cheekbones but below bushy brown eyebrows.

I want to say thank you to everyone who came out here for this, our last seminar before our trek begins anew next year! Carter called out from the stage, looking around at all of them. Jack had often felt like the man was looking directly at him during one of those sweeping gazes. It might be foolish, but this was one of the few things he didn’t mind feeling foolish about. After all, someone had to have noticed Jack in order for him to have been invited to the retreat. Why couldn’t it have been him? "I know many of you are disappointed that you won’t be joining us for our goodwill mission this Monday after school has officially gone back into session, but your continued support is the only reason we’re even able to recognize those who deserve it. So give yourselves a pat on the back!"

The response was enthusiastic, and yet he’d only given them vague sentiments. Most people did what they could, however, little that really was, and saw it as just enough. Most of the people in that amphitheater would never do more than donate a few dollars here and there. Because they hadn’t suffered like Carter had. They could sympathize, but a lot of them would never understand the pain that they went through. Their eyes were closed, but they wouldn’t be for long.

Now, this is the time of year when we are really able to open people’s eyes, Carter went on. People were already leaning in, watching every little thing that Carter did and said. Carter glanced off to the side, his smile wide and friendly. He threw his arm out and yelled over the microphone, Dr. Breslin, do you think you have something you want to add before we get this ball rolling?

Certainly, Quinn Breslin breathed before she sashayed out on the stage, waving with one arm out at the crowd. Her smile was large and brought out her rather noticeable dimples. Unlike Carter, Quinn always had an air of elegance and refinement to her. A white coat billowed around an equally white blouse and pants, and Jack knew that it would be discarded for something far more durable – yet equally as fashionable – for the trip up to Big Bear. Whether or not the white stilettos she wore would be equally discarded, Jack didn’t know. He couldn’t recall a moment where the woman didn’t wear some kind of heel, to add to her professionally perfected image. Her skin was a beautiful shade of olive-brown, and her hair – which was pin straight and fell past her shoulders – wafted around behind her. "I certainly know that those of you who are joining us for this important weekend are those among us who have suffered the most, like Carter and myself. Losing someone to enemy action overseas is an unbearable pain. However, together we can pull through and figure out a way to find those silver linings. However painful they might be.

"Carter and I have worked tirelessly with our most intimate donors in order to draft a bill, one that will help to provide better services to those of us who face the ultimate loss, because of the ultimate sacrifice," Quinn shook her head, and the television made the glint of tears in her eyes clear. Her pain was obvious, too, and she looked away – behind her hand – for a fleeting moment. Carter stepped forward to place a comforting hand on her shoulder, and Jack shook his head in pity. He had lost his father, but those two…

Quinn Breslin had lost her husband while Carter Rollins had lost his son, and the pain that they had suffered had been in solitude. In a time when the internet had been new, reaching out to those who truly understood had been difficult. Yet the two had found one another, and they had decided to combine their skills – Quinn Breslin had been, and still was, a renowned psychiatrist, while Carter Rollins had been a university professor. Both of them talked to people on a daily basis, so why not talk to the country, or even the world at large, all at once and help them through this pain. Help them know that they aren’t alone in the world. If it hadn’t been for their circuit hitting multiple locations in Los Angeles, Jack didn’t know what he would have done these past three years.

His eyes wouldn’t have been opened because he would have wallowed and suffered alone.

Whether or not this bill is a success is not the point, Carter’s voice broke through Jack’s reverie, drawing him back to the here and now. He noticed Brad shift in his seat uncomfortably, but he didn’t say anything. "It’s simply the first step in a long journey towards opening the eyes of those who lead us to the real truth. To the real problems that afflict society. Together we can open their eyes, and let them know that we won’t be ignored in favor of what is happening across the great, big blue ocean. That we are right here, and we need their attention. So, he paused and held his hands up, stopping the smattering of applause that had started to break out around the amphitheater. Opening their eyes is only the beginning. In order to do so, we must make it impossible for them to ignore our collective voices. And soon, it will be."

Applause broke out en masse, and by the time it was all over, Jack was breathless. He wondered how many people around the room knew what would soon happen to ‘open their eyes.’ He wondered how many of them would be willing to go forward. His gaze flickered over towards Brad, who had joined in with the applause and the hooting and hallowing. Would Brad understand? Would he even help? Or would he be one of those who were unwilling to do what was necessary in order to make people wake up to the true problems of the world?

They were difficult questions, but all of them were necessary.

Jack wasn’t quite certain what he did during the three-hour drive to, and up, Big Bear Mountain, but by the time they were pulling into the campground, he knew that he had convinced himself not to ask many questions. There was no time for that, after all. If he truly believed they needed to have their eyes open, then he needed to listen and not question. It was a simple mantra, one that he often fell back on when he started something new. Everything was usually revealed in time, so why force someone to give those answers before they were ready or comfortable?

After everything was all said and done, he would ask them why they had decided on this course of action. He hoped that by then the answers would be obvious. Perhaps then his father, wherever he might have ended up, would truly understand. Perhaps his death wouldn’t have been for nothing.

Jack liked that thought, even if he didn’t believe in something after this life, it helped him to understand. To justify. And in the end, it would help him move forward with everything. However, when it was all said and done, would he be able to forgive himself even if everything was just an illusion? A trick of the eye designed to make people open their eyes and accept what they all just seemed to ignore?

Sure, it started out as charity to draw people in. But eventually, that wasn’t enough. People had forgotten why Carter Rollins had begun this, but those who followed him closely never did. They followed every seminar he gave, hung on every word he spoke, and would do anything he asked because their pain was real and unforgiving. So he forgave them for their anger, their rage, their self-destruction, and he helped them redirect it towards something that could actually make a difference. Or perhaps, at the very least, alert people to the need for a difference.

At the very least…

The scent of pine was heavy in the air when Brad pulled to a slow stop in the densely packed parking lot. Cars were all over the place, though more people had carpooled so that they could accommodate the small amount of parking that was available. Most of the people who had come to Big Bear had done so many times over, so they were comfortable with one another. Jack knew that if he had come even once before that he would have arrived with someone else. Not that he didn’t want to include Brad. He just had his concerns. Just as Jack was certain Carter had of all of them.

He climbed out of the car and took in the late morning sunlight when it peeked through the tall, dense treetops high above them. The campground traveled deeper into the wood, and Jack could already smell the hot dogs and beans cooking on the open fire. He could hear the laughter and conversation that flowed through the air. People were excited and anticipatory. He wondered how many of them were aware of what they would be doing come Monday morning.

Jack slowly walked around the truck towards the back, looking down at the handwritten invitation.

Jack Loughlin,

The people need to have their eyes opened, and often such dramatic change requires an impetus – an event that cannot and will not be ignored by our leaders, and most importantly, our people. Those who truly need to open their eyes to the horror that people – like us – have suffered. The loss of a loved one due to an unnecessary war is, quite simply, an unnecessary tragedy. Certainly we could continue with our little goodwill missions, alerting those who deserve to be recognized the chance to affect real change, but after a while, real change can only come about by action.

I understand that what we discussed the other night might seem more than just a little drastic, but it is wholly necessary for us – those who are truly aware – to help those who are not. To illuminate them to the true, unadulterated threat that is so often glossed over by our media. ‘The death toll,’ ‘civilian and military casualties,’ ‘roadside bombs,’ ‘women and children used to attack soldiers and civilians,’ and so many more of these phrases dominate the headlines of our news cycles for a brief, fleeting moment. In order to truly draw attention to the horrors of an unnecessary war, we must show them the depths of depravity that our enemies are willing to go to. Even if our efforts are false, the idea of what could have happened will be more than enough to spring our people – those who have closed their eyes to the horror and the truth- into action.

Together, Jack, we can bring the attention of what is going on in our world to those who need to pay attention the most. The people will demand action, and our leaders will be obliged to give it to them. Help us to bring this about. Help me to bring this about. And we shall go down in history as the saviors of our people. Those who opened their eyes to the true horrors of war.

I look forward to your prompt response and attendance to our annual retreat in Big Bear this September the third. Until then,

Carter Edward Rollins

The Carter Rollins’ Recognition Foundation and Associates

And so, here he was, ready and willing to affect real change in the world.

Jack looked up from the invitation when the back of the truck opened abruptly, startling him out of his thoughts. Jack smiled meekly and then reached in to grab his duffle bag and some of the supplies that Brad had brought with them.

Well, let’s get this party started, Brad grinned before he pushed the flap to the bed closed with a thrust of his knee. Brad turned his grin on Jack and then jerked his head forward, yelling enthusiastically, Show me the way, man.

Oh, yeah! Jack said with a goofy grin and expression before turning around and hurrying forward through the wooden archway. The sign which dangled from it read Camp Big Bear Welcomes You!

For the most part, the campsite, including the few cabins which dotted it, had been rented out by the Carter Rollins’ Foundation for the entire weekend. However, many who were helping to get the goodwill mission going had been there for weeks beforehand. Other guests had already cycled through. Notably, those who were on the East Coast wouldn’t be a part of this final weekend. They’d had the retreat about two weeks beforehand, so Jack was certain they were already settled back in their homes, with those who were helping out already in the process of getting things going.

Welcome to Camp Big Bear, a bubbly voice flowed through the air towards them, drawing Jack and Brad’s attention towards the supple young woman who now smiled their way – her head tilted just a bit to let her blonde curls bounce against her shoulder when the breeze settled down. I’m Cassadee Drake, but most people just call me Cass! And I am so glad that you were able to make it up to our little get-together, her voice was still bubbly, and when she shifted, there seemed to be a bounce to her step. Her expression grew somber for a moment, and she tapped her chin with a single finger before leaning in a bit, I heard that the road washed out on the way up here. So horrible.

That does sound a bit concerning, Brad mumbled under his breath, looking over at Jack with a face that made him want to laugh. Jack controlled himself, however, and simply nodded in acknowledgment of the woman’s genuine concern. The road washing out this weekend was a bit of an issue, depending on which one it was and if they had planned on using it this weekend. Hey, do you know where we might be able to settle in before this thing gets going?

Oh, absolutely! Cassadee burbled with a wide smile and a clap of her hands that was sudden and startling. Come on, right this way! I’ll show you around and introduce you to a few of our guests.

You mean you’re not one of the guests? Jack hedged carefully after he and Brad fell into step behind the woman. He turned, just so his cut hand was out of her line of sight.

Oh, heaven’s no! Cassadee giggled behind her hand, her smile light and airy, seemingly noticing his pragmatism. She spun around and walked backward expertly, keeping them engaged in conversation while people looked their way in mild interest. I’ve been doing this for so long that I’m practically a part of the family. She shook her head, sending her blonde curls about her wildly. Although, she looked over towards a slender woman off to the side. The woman was about five foot seven inches and her blonde hair was far more subdued than Cassadee’s. That’s Kelly Larson, and she tends to run the show when Mr. Rollins or Dr. Breslin aren’t here. So, if I were you, I would definitely not get on her bad side.

Noted, Brad and Jack said at the same time. They both turned and laughed at one another. The woman, Kelly, looked their way and gave both of the boys a quizzical look. She looked away without saying anything, yet Jack felt as if she had dismissed them as quickly as she had noticed them.

What exactly does she do? Jack asked under his breath, turning back towards Cassadee, who slowed down outside of a large building that seemed to be situated in the center of the campground. It was probably the mess hall. Kelly, I mean.

She’s Mr. Rollins personal assistant, Cassadee said with an offhanded wave of her hand. Jack looked around, doing his best not to smile or giggle. He could see that Cassadee ‘Cass’ Drake didn’t like Kelly, and whether