Foster Parent Handbook

Foster Parent Handbook

Mary R. Rapshaw

Writer’s Showcase

San Jose New York Lincoln Shanghai

Foster Parent Handbook

All Rights Reserved © 2002 by Mary R. Rapshaw

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage retrieval system, without the permission in writing from the publisher.

Writer’s Showcase

an imprint of iUniverse, Inc.

For information address:

iUniverse, Inc.

5220 S. 16th St., Suite 200

Lincoln, NE 68512

www.iuniverse.com

Disclaimer: The inclusion of links and resources in this book does not represent endorsement. We may not share similar philosophies. It is the responsibility of each individual to assess the validity of the information and its applicability to their situation.

ISBN: 0-595-21619-6

ISBN: 978-1-4759-2072-7 (eBook)

Contents

Acknowledgements

Introduction

Part One

1 What is Foster Parenting?

2 The Foster Care Agency

3 Elements of the Home Study

4 Foster Parent Training

5 Is Foster Parenting for You?

Part Two

6 Child Development

7 A Child’s Needs

8 Parenting Issues

9 Fun and Creative Parenting

Part Three

10 Your First Foster Child

11 Putting it All Together

12 The Child’s Biological Family

13 Agency Policy

Part Four

14 Defining Abuse and Neglect

15 The Treatment Team

16 Permanency/ Treatment Planning

17 The Court Process

Part Five

18 The Special Needs Child

19 A Glossary of Special Needs Conditions

20 Adolescent Issues

Part Six

21 Getting Support

22 Ongoing Education

Glossary

Bibliography and References

To Marty: a healer for life’s wounded children

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank the following individuals for their kind contribution to the preparation of this book:

Johnna Breland, President, Alabama Foster and Adoptive Parent Association Carl Brown, Executive Director, South Carolina Foster Parent Association Sarah Casken, Executive Director, Hawaii Foster Parent Association Dot Erickson, Director, Ohio Family Care Association Darlene Flowers, Executive Director, Foster Parents Association of Washington State

Buddy Faye Foster, Executive Director, Oklahoma Lawyers for Children Kim Green, President, Foster Care Association of Oklahoma, Inc. Betty Hastings, President, Tennessee Foster Care Association, Inc. Jene Hillyer, Executive Director, Kansas Foster and Adoptive Families, Inc. Karen Jorgenson, Administrator, National Foster Parent Association Pennsylvania Foster Parent Association

William LaPierre, President, Massachusetts Alliance for Families Kary Ledbetter, President, Idaho Foster and Adoptive Parent’s Coalition Anne Rankin, President, Wisconsin Foster and Adoptive Parent Association, Inc.

Introduction

Wanted: Extra-ordinary Families

Extraordinary foster parents are ordinary people sharing their extras with a hurting child. They may have an extra room, an extra bed, extra time, extra resources, but most of all they have extra love and compassion. There are more children in need of foster homes than there are foster homes to provide for their care. Children often linger in group residences or shelters awaiting available foster homes when there are so many ordinary people who would like to share their abundance, but they do not know where to begin. Often, misconceptions and myths cause families to set aside their interest in foster parenting.

There’s a foster family out there that looks a lot like your family. Foster families come in all sizes, shapes, colors and form. They are everywhere. Some are visible, some hum along unnoticed. Some are good, and some are great. Some should be cloned. Some of their homes should be closed. Some need renovations. There are those that are honored. And there are those that make the headlines. Most are doing their best to include a needy child in their life and home as they weather the ups and downs. They all possess a desire to share a piece of what they cherish, a willingness to take action to save a child in need, the courage to open their family for evaluation, and above all a passion to participate in the healing of a wounded heart.

What Is a Family Foster Home?

foster—1. to bring up; nurture. 2. to promote the development or growth of; encourage. 3. To nurse; cherish. Receiving, sharing, or affording parental care and nurture although not related through legal or blood ties, to nourish (American Heritage Dictionary, 1991).

A child without nurture fails to thrive and suffers unspeakable pain. He needs to share in a safe, stable and loving home. This child may go to school with your children and may have walked past you just yesterday. She is waiting to be noticed and received into an environment that will support growth and development. He needs someone to step up and embrace him. There must be someone who will cherish a needy child. Could you foster this child?

home—4.a. an environment offering security and happiness. b. a valued place regarded as a refuge. Idiom-at home.1.available to receive visitors (American Heritage Dictionary, 1991).

A mom, dad, house and dog do not make a home. It is a human need to have a place of refuge, a place to feel secure and safe, a place to call home. When a family is in crisis, the environment may feel more like a war zone. When crisis’ are persistent and long-lasting a child may have no place to find the restorative rest or security he/she needs. Children depend on adults for their every need. When their physical safety is threatened by alcohol or drug abuse, neglect, battering and/or sexual abuse these needs often go unmet. With no where else to go, they may be forced to endure an onslaught of indignities. The emotional toll is all too often unseen and overlooked. Most of us take for granted the comfort our homes provide. Some of us are very conscious of the blessings of the sanctuary we callhome. A child in crisis is in need of such a blessing. Could you provide a home for him?

parent—1.guardian; protector (American Heritage Dictionary, 1991).

Parenting is temporary. The bare bones function of a parent is to grow a child and release them to live independently. Sometimes, bare bones parenting is all the parenting a child may receive. The neglected and abused child may have a house to live in and sufficient enough food and clothing so that no one notices he is suffering, or that his needs for safety and nurturance are not being met. Healthy parents are able to recognize what children require to grow into healthy adults. There are children in crisis waiting for guidance and protection. Could you protect one of these children from further harm while their family heals?

The Need

In September 1999 more than 581,000 children were in some type of foster care placement in the United States.

Here are some statistics from the 1999 (NCAND) National Child Abuse and Neglect Reporting System (U.S. Dept. Health & Human Services, 2001).

There were an estimated 826,000 victims of maltreatment nationwide.

Almost three-fifths of all victims (58.4 %) suffered neglect, while one-fifth (21.3%) suffered physical abuse; 11.3 percent were sexually abused. More than one-third (35.9%) of all victims were reported to be victims of other or additional types of maltreatment.

The highest victimization rates were for the 0-3 age group (13.9 maltreatments per 1,000 children of this age in the population), and rates declined as age increased.

Rates of many types of maltreatment were similar for male and female children, but the sexual abuse rate for female children (1.6 female children for every 1,000 female children in the population) was higher than the sexual abuse rate for male children (0.4 male children per 1,000).

Children who had been victimized prior to 1999 were almost three times more likely to experience recurrence during the 6 months following their first victimization in 1999 than children without a prior history of victimization.

Perpetrators almost always were family members. In 1999 over 87.3 percent were parents and 3.9 percent were other relatives of the child.

Of every 1,000 children age 0-18 in the country’s population, 6.3 percent are in foster care, with an average stay of nearly 3 years; more than 15,000 foster children leave the system every year without permanent families; and 40 percent of the nation’s homeless are former foster children.

Using this Book

All of the information presented in this book is presented in a generic form and the specifics may vary slightly from state to state. However, most states are very similar in the administration of their foster care program. My knowledge comes from my experiences in the states of New York and Pennsylvania. It is my intent to present the issues, and providea framework for you to be able to determine what information needs to be gathered for your specific state.

I have discovered amazing Internet sites that will be of interest to those who are thinking of or are foster parenting. The wealth of relevant and good information that is available on the Internet is staggering; it serves as a virtual library/bookstore. These wonderful Web sites present far more information than would be practical to include in this book. Because it is my expectation that you will want to take advantage of the Internet, I have provided a brief presentation of tips for novice Internet users in Appendix I. All Web addresses were current at time of publication, however, if a referenced Web site can no longer be accessed, Appendix I will offer some suggestions on how to find the referenced site or an alternative.

This book may be used as a step by step guide through the process of foster parenting or it may be used as a reference book to obtain specific information or sources of information. It provides an overview of relevant issues and familiarizes the prospective foster family with basic concepts and terminology. It is as comprehensive as space has allowed.

The prospect of opening your heart and home to a hurting child is both exhilarating and fearsome. Becoming a foster parent is an awesome and sometimes taxing experience. There is so much to learn about, and there is a considerable amount of paperwork and documentation that must be gathered. Navigating through the foster care system and the myriad of professionals providing children’s services can be intimidating and mind-boggling. It is easy to become overwhelmed by the number of things to consider, but becoming a foster parent does not have to be grueling. Lingering questions and fears of the unknown often exclude wonderful, prospective families from pursuing foster parenting. I believe that this lack of information and/or misconceptions about foster care is what is keeping you from sharing your life with a wounded child. My hope is that good families with good hearts, equipped with the information contained here, will open their hearts and homes to a foster child.

Part One

The Process of Becoming a Foster Parent

1 What is Foster Parenting?

Foster parents provide a substitute family life for hurting children who are in need of a temporary home. Prospective foster parents must undergo a thorough screening process to assure that children placed in their homes will find a safe and nurturing environment. There are many misconceptions, myths and misunderstandings regarding the role or suitability of families who would like to become foster parents. The following chapters will address some of these concerns. If your family has a desire to explore the option of foster parenting, this book should provide all the information you will need to make your decision.

As a foster parent you will be expected to provide the same things that all children need from their parents: love, nurturance, acceptance, safety, food, clothing, shelter, guidance, education, and a sense of community. In addition to giving the support the children need to grow physically, emotionally, educationally and socially, you will be asked to interact with service agencies, biological parents, the courts, medical or psychological providers, educational programs, and keep detailed records for your foster child.

All children placed voluntarily or involuntarily in foster care are placed under the guardianship of the local courts and their care is administrated by an agency licensed by your state to provide foster care services. There are private and pubic agencies. In less populated areas public agencies may be the only resource for prospective foster parents. Chapter 2 discusses foster parent agencies and how to locate and choose an agency in your area. It is an agency’s responsibility to find and licence suitable foster homes, place children in the most appropriate foster care setting and to oversee the child’s care until the child is returned home or to another permanent living arrangement.

Who Are the Foster Children?

— Children who have been abused and neglected

— Children who have been abandoned by their caretakers

— Children who have been surrendered by their guardians for adoption

— Children who have been placed in care because their parents cannot control their behavior

— Children who have committed a crime

— Children who have no biological family or legal guardian

— Children who have parents whose parental rights have been terminated

— Children with special medical or emotional needs that their guardians cannot meet

— Adolescents who are without family, but not emancipated

— Adolescents with children of their own or are pregnant

— Children who have HIV/AIDS

— Adolescents with drug or alcohol related problems

— Children who are affected by parental alcohol abuse

What Are Some Reasons For Foster Care Placement?

— Neglect/Abuse of the child

— Mental illness of the child

— HIV/AIDS (parent(s))

— Death of parents

— Poor parenting skills

— Children’s emotional or behavioral health needs

— Inadequate housing

— Incarceration of parents

— Drug abuse of parent or child

Qualities of a Prospective Foster Parent:

— Good physical and mental health, free from communicable diseases

— Gifted with an unconditional love for children

— An ability to bond and attach to children quickly, but able to separate from the child when he/she moves toward a permanent home

— The ability to provide care, nurturing and supervision to children

— Stable relationships with those living in their household

— Flexibility, physical energy and patience

— A compassion and love for children

— A willingness to learn about and adjust to the needs of troubled children

— An understanding of themselves and their own needs

— Motivation to persevere and accept change in the face of adversity

— An ability to meet the foster child’s developmental needs and deal with delays and disabilities

— A willingness and ability to respect, care for, value, nurture and love

— Supportive community ties with family, friends and neighbors

Requirements to be Met Prior to the Application Process

— Be age 21 or over (age 18 for a few states)

— Be single, married or divorced for a specified (by your state) amount of time usually (1-3 years)

— A stable, mature home

— A willingness to care for a foster child

— A willingness to share information above yourself regarding your background and lifestyle

— Clear criminal and child abuse/neglect background (see disqualifying conditions listed in Appendix F)

— Good physical and mental health, and free of communicable diseases

— Safe and adequate housing (do not need to own your home).

— No more than your state’s allowable number of children per foster home (varies from state to state, the average is no more than five, inclusive of your children)

— An income or financial resources that support your family without assistance of foster care stipend

— A commitment to support the relationships between children and their families and promote permanency planning with the goal of reunification with the child’s family or another safe, nurturing placement that is intended to last a lifetime

— An ability to work effectively with the child’s treatment team

— Ability and willingness to work with agency and other service providers

— Ability and willingness to work with the child’s guardians toward the goal of reunification

— Complete the agency’s requirements for licensing (also referred to as certification, assessment or home study)

Agency Requirements For Licensing

— meet the qualities listed in qualities for prospective foster parents in above section

— meet the application requirements listed above

— attend an informational, orientation, or initial meeting presented by the foster care agency

— permit fire, health and safety inspections of your home

— have a working telephone

— complete an agency application

— participate in a home study

— meet with the licensing worker in your home or the agency office as requested by agency

— provide relative and non-relative references (usually 3-5)

— provide a health certificate for each household member, including a statement that you have been tested for TB and are free from communicable diseases

— attend any required formal training

— be willing to abide by a policy of no physical discipline

— be willing to abide by the state agency standards, policies, practices and procedures

Some Types of Foster Homes

It is likely that you will be applying to become what is referred to as a regular (or family) foster home. However, there are many other settings that provide living arrangements for foster children. Some of the types are listed below with a description of each. You may receive a child who was formerly in one of these settings or a child may be moved from your home into one of these types of placement.

Family Foster Homes

Regular Foster Care: provides temporary (a few days to years) home for a child until a permanent living arrangement can be established.

Emergency Foster Care: a foster home that is available for immediate placement of a child on a 24 hour basis. This placement may last a few hours, a few weeks or it may become more long-term.

Respite Foster Care: provides a home for a foster child who is in placement at another foster home so that his foster parents may take an occasional break.

Long-term Foster Care: care that is provided for a child who will not be returning home and has no plans for adoption. Usually the child’s permanency plan is independent living.

Foster Home-Adoption Consideration Care: care for a child who is placed in a foster home with the understanding that if the child becomes freed for adoption, the foster parents will adopt him/her.

Kinship Foster Care: foster care that is provided by a relative of the child.

Additional Information on Kinship Foster Care

Keeping the Family Tree Intact through Kinship Foster Care.

http://www.calib.com/naic/pubs/f_kinshi.htm

Casey National Center for Resource Family Support.

www.casey.org/cnc/kinship_facts.htm

Foster Homes with Approved Specializations

Foster care regulations allow for the specialization of foster homes to meet the special placement needs for each foster child. These homes may or may not also be foster group homes. A foster home cannot represent that it specializes in a specific type of care without agency certification of such.

Group homes for adolescents preparing for independent living: This is a home for teens for whom family reunification or adoption is not feasible. A foster home with a specialization in supervised transitional living provides or assists a teen to obtain services that will help him/her successfully prepare for the transition to adulthood and independent living. See Chapter 20 from additional information on Independent Living.

Group homes for pregnant and parenting teens: This is a specialized foster home that cares for pregnant and parenting adolescents, before or after the adolescent gives birth and provides care as needed to mothers and their infants. Infants are counted in the total number of children allowed in foster care. Chapter 20 provides additional information on this subject.

Emergency Shelter Care in Foster Homes: These homes specialize in emergency shelter care and take in children on an emergency basis until the child can be placed in a regular foster home.

Medical Foster Care Homes: The children placed in these homes may have complex medical problems and/or developmental disabilities. Children with complex medical problems include: those who are terminally ill, AIDS/HIV positive, fetal alcohol/drug abused, those suffering from debilitating neurological disorders, cardiopulmonary diseases, and a variety of other medical disorders.

Specialized Group Homes: Specialized group homes serve a specific population such as those that are emotionally disturbed, delinquent or mentally challenged. Group Homes can be licensed for a specific number of children, depending on physical space and staff availability. The administrative rate for group home placements can vary according to the types and intensity of services, the amount of staff coverage, and the education and experience of the professional staff involved.

Therapeutic Foster Homes: Therapeutic foster homes provide care for those children in need of a structured therapeutic environment with a smaller population and more intense intervention than a specialized group home. Support services in these homes include psychotherapy, tutoring, on-going parent training, and child-specific programs. Therapeutic Foster Home parents typically have a great deal of experience and are considered a part of the professional treatment team. Rates for these homes include a salary for direct care givers.

2 The Foster Care Agency

All foster family homes are administrated by a state approved foster care agency. These agencies may be public or private, but, there will always be a public agency serving your community. The foster care agency handles all aspects of the foster care process, from finding and certifying foster parents to overseeing that all the needs of the foster child are being met. They administer foster care services according to specifically defined regulations set by national, state and local foster care law and regulations. A prospective foster parent is free to choose which agency (public or private) he/she would like to work with, however, most agencies require a sole commitment. That means you may be licensed and accept placements from only one agency.

Finding a Foster Parent Agency in Your Community

Check your local telephone directory. Usually you will be able to find telephone listings of foster care agencies in your community. Public agencies are often found in the blue pages in the County Government or Regional Government category. They may be listed as Children and Youth Division, Family Foster Care Services, Department of Human Services, Department of Social Services, etc. Appendix A provides clues as to how your public agency may be listed. Private foster care agencies may be listed in the yellow pages under Agencies—Foster Care, Foster Family Care Agencies, Children—Agencies, Dept. of Human Resources, Dept. of Health & Human Services, Dept. of Human Services, Dept. of Social Services, Dept. of Children & Family Services for Children, Youth & Their Family, etc.

Refer to Appendix A. Your state public agency should be listed in Appendix A. They will be able to provide you with your local agencies contact information and other general information on foster parenting in your state.

Police departments or hospitals. If you are still unable to find an agency in your community, most police departments or hospitals have had some contact with placement agencies and may be able to provide you with contact information.

Internet listings. A Web site that provides regional contact information for some states may be found in Appendix A.

Your state child abuse reporting hotline/registry. As a last resort, these hotlines/registries should be able to give you contact information. Their telephone numbers are usually listed prominently in your local telephone directory.

Contacting an Agency

Most agencies have packets that they will mail to prospective foster parents who make a telephone request for information. You may ask questions at the time of this initial request or you may telephone later to get further information. The following list provides examples of the types of information you may want to gather:

— Establish that you have reached the specific agency worker who handles foster parenting inquiries, not a switchboard operator

— Clarify that they provide services to the area you live in

— Obtain the worker’s name, agency name and address, and direct phone number and extension.

— Request written information be mailed to you or obtain a location where you may pick up information

— If you have access to the Internet, ask if they have a Web site.

— If you are less than 21 ask about age requirements. A very few states do license foster parents at age 18.

— If they are not a public agency, how do they receive their foster care referrals?

— If they are a private agency, do they only provide specialized foster care services?

— How do you get started? Is there an informational or orientation meeting? When is the next meeting?

— What kind of training do they provide? Is training required as a prerequisite for licensing? What about continuing training after licencing? Request a list of training topics.

— How accessible are the agencies workers for foster parent concerns? How often will they visit your home?

— Are there support services available for foster parents? Is there a foster parent association in your area? What is the agency’s relationship and interaction with the association?

— How long will the licensing process take?

— Who makes the final decision regarding whom the agency will license?

— How long will it be, after the home study is completed, before you will be notified of the agency’s decision?

— How many foster homes are in your area? How many are overseen by their agency?

— Are there gatherings organized for the agency’s foster parents to meet each other?

— How many foster children are in the agency’s care? How many children do they place weekly? monthly? yearly?

— If you have specific concerns about whether you would be automatically disqualified from obtaining a foster care license (see Appendix F ), you may want to mention that you may have a life history issue that could disqualify you and request an appointment to discuss the issue.

— Do they have a list of a few of their foster parents that you could contact for information about foster parenting and the agency?

Attend an Orientation/Informational Meeting

The orientation meeting is an agency’s opportunity to recruit prospective foster parents. Usually it is a casual gathering held at the foster care agency’s offices. Sometimes civic, social or religious organizations host foster care informational meetings for their members and these meetings may be held at that organization’s location. You will be presented with an overview of the foster care agency’s needs, services provided and requirements for certification, and will be given an opportunity to ask questions. At the orientation meeting you should not feel pressured or under any obligation to take any action. Take as much time as you need before making any commitment to proceed.

Choosing an Agency

If your community has private agencies, as well as the public agency, you may initially want to contact more than one agency. After gatheringinformation and making comparisons, you may make a decision of which agency best suits your family’s preferences.

Further Information Gathering

Read this book. There are many good books that address specific issues faced by those who are already foster parenting but none that guide you through the certification process or outline the specifics on how to get your foster care license.The main reason this book was written was to provide a comprehensive how-to get started book for those interested in foster parenting. My hope is that you will use it as a guide to resources in your community and on the Internet.

Books on adoption. The requirements for adoption are very similar to the certification process for foster parents. There are many good books on adoption that may supplement this book.

Internet resources. Browse through this book and go to some of the Web site referenced at the end of most chapters. If you are new to the Internet, see Appendix I for hints on how to get started. The wealth of information available on the Internet is staggering, but sometimes may be hard to locate. Hopefully, this book will serve as a more direct road map.

Contact a Foster Parent Association. Appendix A provides information to help locate a foster parent association in your area.

Who’s Who at the Agency?

The person who will be working with you from the agency may be referred to by a variety of titles, sometimes the titles are used interchangeably within the agency and community, and it often becomes confusing. The titles will vary from area to area. The person who does