L. I. F. E.: Living in Fantasy Expectations

L. I. F. E.

Living In Fantasy Expectations

By:

Emelda R.N. Phillip

AuthorHouse™

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© 2012 by Emelda R.N. Phillip. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 01/24/2012

ISBN: 978-1-4685-4722-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4685-4721-4 (ebk)

Printed in the United States of America

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

BIBLIOGRAPHY

L.I.F.E. is an awe inspiring book that chronicles the life of the author. I have known the author for a short time, but have found in her a strong Christian faith that has propelled her to great heights in both her personal and professional life. Ms. Phillip has a deep commitment to others, and her love for others is exhibited in her genuine desire to help. I would highly recommend this book to everyone who is seeking their path in life, through the insights of a life well lived; it will strengthen them in their walk and through their trials.

Myra Robinson, Ph.D., LCSW

Roselle, New Jersey

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I would first like to thank and praise my Lord and savior Jesus Christ because he is the reason I was truly able to make it through all that I went through. His strength was truly perfect during my time of weakness. I would like to thank my Mom (Roma Phillip) for her many prayers, sermons, persistence, hard work and even stubbornness. She is my mother whom I love with all my heart and wish only but greatness in her life. I would like to thank my dad (Joseph Phillip) for his many prayers, sermons, speeches, knowledge, time and effort in my life. We had our share of differences but we have grown even stronger than before. May God truly bless you and your family and I love you! To my dad’s wife may God truly help you and bless you. To the two other E girls which are now four in total, Esther, Elizabeth and new little step sister Emmanuelle. You were not easy on me as a child but you forced me to toughen up and have thick skin. Despite our many and do mean many arguments living all under the same household growing up and fights, we remained sisters. We had many good times and memories and expect many more to come. May your lives be filled with happy days and funny memories, I love all three of you guys. To my other step sister Willette and baby Gregory God bless you guys on your future endeavors, love you both. To a woman who got on my nerves many times but kept coming back to our family over again like an adopted sister Cheri. Thank you for the many experimental hairdos you have done during my time in high school, your jokes, your knowledge and schooling about life. To your husband and kids whom we adopted as our nieces and nephew (Jakeena, Jon-ye and Joshua), we watched them develop from babies into young adults. Love you guys and I wish you all the best. To my aunt (Angela Soverall) who’s love has been displayed in so many forms over the years. You have been very supportive of me and my family and I truly appreciate and love you dearly for that. May God truly bless you and your family. To my family members (that I cannot name all at this time) that are across the globe in Canada, Georgia, New York, Trinidad and Scotland may God bless you and keep you. To friends I have met over the years, coworkers, schoolmates, church affiliates and random people at large that somehow affected my life whether in a positive or negative way may God bless you all.

INTRODUCTION

No one is exempt from issues but it is not the issue but it is how you handle the problem that separates you from everybody else. This book exemplifies struggles, issues, drama as well as good times, laughs and memories. There can be a group of people looking at the same one picture in an art gallery but each person formulates different perceptions of the piece that is in front of them. This book displays how one family could share common household experiences but each one perceived the memories differently. This is my perception of times I shared and the life I led. For discloser sake I did not include any names beside my immediate family of four and few celebrity artist. Any other names mentioned in this book are fictitious names but real characters.

CHAPTER ONE

Back In The Day

It all began when I was born on the 29 th day of September in 1983. I was born from two parents of the Caribbean Island, Trinidad and Tobago. My mom Roma Phillip was a patient care worker who dealt mainly with senior citizens in adult daily living. My father Joseph Phillip was a telecommunication officer, who dealt with stocks, bonds, and international wire transfers in NY. I had two older siblings, Esther Phillip, which is the eldest child and Elizabeth Phillip, which is the middle child and of course I am the youngest of the bunch. Being born a Phillip had its advantages and disadvantages. The advantages were that we were a family of high morals and values. We also possessed a strong Christian belief system and were brought up with the fear of the lord. Now the disadvantages were being taken advantage of and being laid back about it, not being able to say no when no was needed to be said, not being affectionate enough towards one another and most of all a whole lot of sweeping. Sweeping represents putting major and minor issues under the rug and never dealing with them when they needed to be dealt with. Other than that we were raised to be proud of who we were and what we stood for. Basically we were proud to be a Phillip at least I was.

Growing up as a child I did not have many friends, I had acquaintances. We would call each other friends when at school, but I knew who my real friends were and who I just merely socialized with at school. I could count my true friends on one hand. Tell you the truth I was never the sociable type, I rather stay by myself and have fun by myself then be around a bunch of people that really do not care much about me, but about what I could offer them. I saw how my sister’s would be fighting with their friends, make up with them and then fight again and I said to myself that is too much drama for me. One of the good things about having friends is for sociable activities such as going out to the movies and shopping (which is my favorite thing to do), but at an early age I learned how to do many of those things by myself and enjoyed it to. Do not get me wrong, I did go out with my friends many places, but I also enjoyed the company of going out by myself as well. Some people will not go any where unless they were with other people.

My motto is if you cannot enjoy your own company how will you enjoy the company of someone else.

My sister’s were very sociable and had lots of friends. Almost every day my sisters use to come home from school with their friends and then play school at the house. It was there homemade version of an after school program. They would rotate the teacher’s role and the remaining kids were the students. They would do their homework and other things pertaining to school, as well as look at Poster’s from Music artists (I know I use to be listening by the door). Although I was too young to join in their school, I would always ask every time they had their meetings if I could be apart and they would always kick me out screaming, Mom get Emelda. One time I develop my own homemade after school program with my teddy bears and Barbie dolls. Now I should of mentioned that my after school program was more of an early morning head start, no wonder when I went into my sister’s room at 2:00a.m in the mourning asking her if she wanted to join the teddies and I for school, she looked at her alarm clock and said no and get out of my room it is 2:00 in the morning. My dad was also a very sociable person. My dad was the only child, so he always longed for that sibling relationship. Since my dad never had any sisters or brothers to talk and play with, all those stored up conversations he let loosed in his adulthood with friends and family; basically he loves to talk. My mom was half and half, she did have friends many through the affiliation of my dad, but at times she just wanted to be by herself. She would always tell her kids and sometimes her husband (if we were babbling about nothing major) Oh be quiet you are talking too much.

My parents were strong believers in, spare the rod, spoil the child and foolishness is bound in the head of a child but the rod of correction would drive it far from them. My parents had no problem beating their children mainly my father. He would beat first and ask questions later; sometimes he never asked any questions he would just beat. Do not get me wrong he was not an abusive father but he believed in appropriate