10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids
()
About this ebook
10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids is your guidebook for talking to your children. Learn what they need to know and how to talk to them about important subjects. Take the mystery and confusion out of talking to your children about drugs, sex, values, safety, technology, and much more. Learn how these discussions can strengthen your relationship with your children and provide them with the resources needed to live safe and happy lives.
Michelle Farias
Michelle Farias, MA, LPC, is a licensed professional counselor. She has experience as a therapist, public speaker, consultant, and teacher. She lives in Texas with her husband, two children, and five dogs.
Read more from Michelle Farias
12 Steps to Health, Wealth, and Joy: A Guide to Living Well Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings25 Ways to Keep Your Child Safe, Healthy and Successful: Lessons from a School Counselor Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to 10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids
Related ebooks
Raising Better Children: Key to Effective Parenting Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHow To Influence Your Kids For Good Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhen Love Comes Back: Growing Relationships with our Children Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhat Every Parent Should Know About Raising Children Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings7 Steps to Raising Amazing Children Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShaping the Lives of Our Children: Parenting Is Not a Friendship Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Parent's Complete Guide: What to Teach, How and When to Teach It Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPower Women: Stories of Motherhood, Faith, and the Academy Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsParenting Through The Chaos Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Happy Kid Is Not a Bully: A Guilt-Free Parenting Plan for Your Great Legacy Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsChanging Directions: Forming a beautiful bond between a mother and teen daughter Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRaising Freakishly Well-Behaved Kids: 20 Principles for Becoming the Parent your Child Needs Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Permission to Parent: How to Raise Your Child with Love and Limits Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Forget Having Kids. I'm Having Fun: 1000 Random Reason I Chose to Be #ChildFree Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Parent Model: An Interactive Guide to Parenting Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGist: The Essence of Raising Life-Ready Kids Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Parenting for Crisis Avoidance: Discover 22 Powerful, Practical, Parenting Tips & 101 Tools Used to Rear Responsible Children Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTaming the Tiger Mom: A Balanced Approach to Maximizing a Child's Potential Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsParenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5toughLOVE: Raising Confident, Kind, Resilient Kids Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsManners Begin at Breakfast: Modern Etiquette for Families Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Partnership: Surviving & Thriving Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSix-Word Lessons for Intentional Parenting: 100 Timeless Lessons to Help Your Kids Learn, Laugh and Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Twelve Greatest Gifts We Give Our Children: How to Be the Mom Your Children Truly Need and Create the Family You Always Wanted Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings10 Things Every Parent Needs to Know Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5COMPASS: 10 Parenting Principles for Guiding Girls into Becoming Adults Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPreparing Your Child for the Journey Through Adolescence: A Handbook for Parents Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Practical Guide to Family Psychology: You've had a baby - now what? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhat Will You Do Mom? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsParental As Anything Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Relationships For You
The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges: 60 Habit-Forming Programs to Live an Infinitely Better Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex: Creating a Marriage That's Both Holy and Hot Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Unoffendable: How Just One Change Can Make All of Life Better (updated with two new chapters) Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Codependence and the Power of Detachment: How to Set Boundaries and Make Your Life Your Own Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5ADHD: A Hunter in a Farmer's World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5All About Love: New Visions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It's Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries Workbook: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: The Narcissism Series, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Art of Loving Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5
Reviews for 10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids - Michelle Farias
10 Must-Have
Conversations with
Your Kids
Michelle Farias
Order this book online at www.trafford.com
or email orders@trafford.com
Most Trafford titles are also available at major online book retailers.
© Copyright 2013 Michelle Farias.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the written prior permission of the author.
isbn: 978-1-4669-9301-3 (sc)
isbn: 978-1-4669-9300-6 (e)
Trafford rev. 06/13/2013
7-Copyright-Trafford_Logo.ai www.trafford.com
North America & international
toll-free: 1 888 232 4444 (USA & Canada)
phone: 250 383 6864 ♦ fax: 812 355 4082
Contents
Introduction
Chapter 1 Values
Chapter 2 Safety
Chapter 3 Relationships
Chapter 4 Sex
Chapter 5 Technology
Chapter 6 Drugs
Chapter 7 Finances
Chapter 8 Habits
Chapter 9 Future
Chapter 10 Thoughts
Conclusion
Introduction
"I don’t’ want to go to school. My ten year-old daughter’s arms were crossed, and she wasn’t budging from the worn square of our kitchen tile.
You have to go, I said sternly.
Dad and I have to go to work and you have to go to school. That’s just the way it is. She looked at the ground, paused a moment and said,
No. I’m not going."
What do I do? I wondered with frustration. This had been going on for two months. I followed all of my own advice and the advice of others as I tried to figure out how to get my daughter over this phase of hating school. My husband and I met several times with her teacher as well as the school counselor; I questioned her endlessly to be sure she wasn’t being bullied or treated poorly at school; I consulted with other professionals; and we met with her pediatrician. We did it all. Everyone kept saying there must be something going on.
My daughter was president of the student council, a member of safety patrol, in the gifted and talented program, and well-behaved. She had friends that often came over to play, and she was excited about beginning middle school. Yet we began each morning with the struggle of getting her out the door, and we ended each day with her pleas to be homeschooled. Many tears were shed (by both of us), but nothing of substance was going on. My daughter was just done with fifth grade.
In her mind, fifth grade was over. She was finished—except the school year was not over. There were still three more months to endure: three more months of crying; three more months of begging to stay home; three more months of listening to all of the well-thought-out reasons of why she needed to stay home. My husband, Tom, and I were exasperated. I had spent years counseling parents and their children for many issues that families face. Yet I looked in the mirror and wondered, Who is the expert now? Who’s the expert now?!
One of our most humbling experiences is to be a parent. It doesn’t matter how many degrees we have, kids will find a way to show us that there is still so much more to learn. Society provides us with challenges to raising healthy children, yet kids, in all of their creative individualism, will also find ways to push the limits of our abilities to parent. Doubting ourselves and wondering if we are messing-up our children’s futures are often a daily struggle.
As a school counselor, I frequently get calls from frustrated parents. Parents reach the point with their children where they don’t know what to do anymore. They have tried everything they know to get their children to make the best choices, and nothing is working. Parenting children today is more challenging than ever because so many outside forces influence the healthy development of kids.
Parenting, though, is an amazing experience. Watching our children develop into young adults is breathtaking, and it becomes even more profound as we watch them grow into their own role as parents while we gratefully embrace our new position as grandparents.
In this journey, we can’t shield our children from the world as they mature into adults. They will encounter questionable—if not frightening—situations and they will make choices with which we don’t agree. It’s not our children’s job to live the lives we choose for them, and it is not our job to micromanage their development. Yet it is our job to prepare them for their journey by providing them with the tools that will help them make the best choices for their lives. It is our job to teach them about the options available for them in this world and guide them as they choose what is right for their lives. We can teach them about healthy relationships, how to make choices based on what feels right for them, and what pitfalls to avoid in life. We provide the filter through which our children view the world, and we give them the resources needed to make healthy choices.
10 Must-Have Conversations with Your Kids is a guide for you to know what topics are essential to discuss with your children. I have worked with children for many years as a school counselor and a private therapist. I discovered early in my career that children often don’t know what we think they know. The issues discussed in this book are the ones children ask me. As parents and guardians, we assume that some things are just common sense, and our children don’t need us to clarify how to handle problems. Yet many kids don’t have these tools available because no one has thought to teach them the basics.
Our role as parents and guardians requires us to prepare our children for the bigger world, and