Ways to Improve Relationship Communication

WAYS TO IMPROVE RELATIONSHIP COMMUNICATION

How to Communicate About Serious Issues in a Relationship and Understanding the True Meaning of Perfect Relationships and Marriage

Table of Contents

Introduction............................................................................................................7

Chapter 1: Understand the True Meaning of Perfect Relationships....9

Set Known Boundaries.........................................................................................9

Use the I Keyword.............................................................................................10

Avoid Interruptions...............................................................................................10

Ask Valid Questions..............................................................................................10

Stay In the Moment..............................................................................................11

Resort to Nonverbal Language...........................................................................11

Being Emotional Is Not Necessary.....................................................................11

The School Of Honesty.........................................................................................12

Just Hear Them Out..............................................................................................12

Chapter 2: How to Communicate about Serious Issues in a Relationship................13

Find a Good Time..................................................................................................13

Think before you speak........................................................................................13

Deal with important issues early........................................................................13

Keep everything private.......................................................................................14

Explore your spouse’s beliefs, thoughts and feelings......................................14

Prepare to receive a defensive or negative response......................................14

Tailor the message................................................................................................15

Be honest................................................................................................................15

Chapter 3: How Better Communication Leads to a Healthier Relationship................16

The Power of Words..............................................................................................17

Ways to Encourage Healthy Communication in Your Marriage....................18

Commit to the relationship..............................................................................18

Be available........................................................................................................18

Find time to speak with your spouse...........................................................19

Make it a rewarding experience for both of you........................................19

Forgive..............................................................................................................19

Make it a habit.................................................................................................19

Chapter 4: Pathways of Effective Communication in relationships......21

The Non-Confrontational Communication.........................................................21

The Confronting Form of Communication.........................................................21

The Discussion Communication..........................................................................22

Resolving Conflict.................................................................................................22

The Volatile Technique.........................................................................................23

The Validating Technique....................................................................................23

The Avoidant Technique.......................................................................................23

Chapter 5: Communication at the Beginning of Budding Relationships................25

Chapter 6: Rules for Effective Communication in a Relationship.........28

The Forgiving Principle........................................................................................28

Be Willing to Accept Corrections......................................................................29

Be Quiet and Listen..............................................................................................31

Chapter 7: The Art of Positive Relationship Communication.................33

Change Your Thoughts.........................................................................................33

Don’t Take Your Personal Relationship Too Personally..................................34

Employ the Art of Separation..............................................................................34

Employ the Art of Mindfulness............................................................................35

Just Breathe...........................................................................................................36

Take Responsibility for Your Emotions..............................................................37

The Complimentary Art........................................................................................37

Things You Are Thankful For...............................................................................38

Connect with Positive People..............................................................................38

The Selfless Act.....................................................................................................38

Helping Your Spouse with Negativity..............................................................39

Chapter 8: Ways to Effectively Become Emotionally Open in Your Relationship................41

Get Rid of Blinders................................................................................................42

Employ Assertiveness...........................................................................................42

Be the Reliable Partner........................................................................................43

You Might Be Wrong.............................................................................................43

Allow for Compromise..........................................................................................44

Talk About New Things........................................................................................44

Validate Your Spouse’s Feelings.........................................................................44

Build Trust..............................................................................................................45

STRENGTHEN Your Confidence.............................................................................45

Chapter 9: The Art of Intent Listening in a Relationship.........................46

DO NOT LOSE Your Sense of Humor...................................................................46

Communication Is Not a Burden.........................................................................46

Do Not Accuse, Shame or Judge.........................................................................47

Really Forgive........................................................................................................47

You Will Make Mistakes.......................................................................................48

Reject the Fear of Being Rejected......................................................................48

Try Not to Say I Do not Know..........................................................................48

Chapter 10: Solving Intimacy Problems in a Relationship......................50

Identify Your Love Language..............................................................................50

Exclusively Express Your Concerns about a Certain Problem.......................50

Do Not Doubt the Emotions You Have...............................................................51

Show Your Affection Openly................................................................................52

They Also Need Compassion and Understanding............................................52

Be Okay When You Have To Be On Your Own..................................................53

Find a Uniform Passion........................................................................................54

Chapter 11: Why Communication Matters in a Relationship..................55

Communication creates strong bonds................................................................55

Communication prevents misunderstandings, confusion, and wrong assumptions...............55

Communication keeps couples emotionally connected...................................56

Communication helps in resolving marital conflicts........................................56

It keeps you and your partner from drifting apart...........................................56

It allows you to be true to who you are.............................................................57

It feels great to be heard.....................................................................................57

It deepens your relationship................................................................................57

It makes conversations around money much easier........................................57

You get a lot of quality time with your partner................................................57

You are blessed with the joy of rediscovery......................................................58

You build a firm foundation for your marriage.................................................58

Chapter 12: Basic Communication Skills ALL Couples Need to Develop................59

Listening...............................................................................................................59

Understanding Body Language...........................................................................60

Reading Your Partner’s Body Language Correctly..........................................60

Facial Expressions................................................................................................61

Eye Contact............................................................................................................61

The Arms and the Hands......................................................................................61

The Proximity.........................................................................................................62

Fidgeting About.....................................................................................................62

Chapter 13: Tips for Positive Communication in a Relationship...........63

Focus on the Issue................................................................................................63

Listen to Your Partner..........................................................................................63

Make every Attempt to Compromise for the Best Solution............................63

Understanding a Critical Communication Need and Solutions.....................64

A Common Problem and Need............................................................................64

Touch Each Other.................................................................................................64

DemonstratING Respect for Your Partner is always a great way for improving marital relationships................64

Use kind words in your conversations...............................................................65

Avoid solving difficult conflicts after 8pm.........................................................65

Don’t force a meeting...........................................................................................65

Seek professional help.........................................................................................65

Give yourself time to calm down........................................................................65

Pick the right time to have the conversation....................................................66

Always keep their feelings in mind....................................................................66

Be open...................................................................................................................66

Chapter 14: The Five Levels of Communication in a Relationship........67

Cliché conversation...............................................................................................67

Reporting of facts..................................................................................................67

Expressing one's own ideas and judgments......................................................67

Expressing one's own feelings or emotions or the gut-level communication...............68

Peak Communication............................................................................................68

Chapter 15: Barriers to Effective Communication in a Relationship.69

Emotions...............................................................................................................69

Timing...................................................................................................................69

Language..............................................................................................................69

Perception and Assumptions...............................................................................70

Listening skills.......................................................................................................70

Environment...........................................................................................................70

Religion and beliefs..............................................................................................70

Child rearing principles.......................................................................................71

Chapter 16: How to Express Your Own Thoughts and Emotions in a Relationship................72

Get their attention.................................................................................................72

Respect your partner............................................................................................72

Don’t be repetitive................................................................................................72

Speak in a way your spouse would understand................................................73

Speak for yourself only.........................................................................................73

Be positive..............................................................................................................73

Listen to and observe his or her responses......................................................73

Don’t try to prove that you’re always right.......................................................74

Chapter 17: Communication mistakes made by couples in a Relationship................75

Expecting Things to Just Work Out....................................................................75

Thinking There Is No Way Out............................................................................76

Communicating Too Much or Not Enough........................................................77

Wanting To be Right.............................................................................................77

Making Assumptions..........................................................................................79

Talking Down or Being Passive-Aggressive....................................................79

Not Being Sober....................................................................................................81

Interrupting Your Partner....................................................................................81

Bad Timing.............................................................................................................82

Being Impatient and Unnecessarily Demanding..............................................83

Making Comparisons............................................................................................84

Chapter 18: Sexual Communication in Your Relationship.......................86

Chapter 19: Communication through Hardships......................................89

Chapter 20: Conflict Resolution in Relationships.......................................92

Maintain a calm, composed, and respectful stance during heated discussions................92

Get to the root of the issue..................................................................................93

Pick your battles....................................................................................................93

Identify a middle ground......................................................................................94

Limit yourself to a single hurt.............................................................................94

Check with your partner whether your response led them to believe that you completely understood why they were hurt................95

Don’t build a hurt museum..................................................................................96

Don’t hesitate to enlist external help.................................................................96

Don’t get defensive when criticized...................................................................96

Stay away from negativity...................................................................................97

Know when it is time for a timeout....................................................................97

Chapter 21: Why Is Emotional Communication Significant in Relationships?................98

Share small insignificant experiences instead of just speaking about it......98

Increase these shared experiences on a daily basis......................................99

Small talk can be big when it comes to boosting relationships...................99

Listen mindfully...................................................................................................100

Talk about yourself too......................................................................................100

Conclusion...............................................................................................................101

Introduction

It is no secret that effective communication in today’s world is at an all-time low. Communication between couples, no matter how long people have been together, is an essential piece to making things work long-term, through the good, the bad, and the ugly that life inevitably throws our way.

Within the chapters of this book, you will discover and perhaps relate to why our society blatantly sucks at communication, a variety of tips and techniques to better understand communication and the importance it holds within your own relationship, how to hone your nonverbal and sexual communication, and much more.

Communication is the foundation of any good relationship. Strong relationship intimacy may not be possible without effective communication between spouses. Even the relationship that is falling apart can be saved when communication is applied effectively. In the history of marriage, the bad habit of lack of communication contributes to 80 percent of the problems faced by couples.

The importance of effective communication cannot be overemphasized. Mistakes that may destroy your relationship can only be avoided when issues are communicated and when both partners understand each other at a reasonable level.

An individual in a committed relationship needs a continuous affirmation that will encourage his or her performance even in the midst of financial struggle. A husband needs to feel appreciated and affirmed for being a good husband and father. He needs to feel that his effort is paying off by actually providing satisfaction and happiness in the family.

The purpose of this book is to guide you through a couple of the most important communication mistakes. It will help you understand how you and your partner engage in these mistakes. It will also shed some light on where these mistakes have their origin and how you can spot them easily. It will also provide easy solutions that will help you nurture a healthier, more trustful and more harmonious relationship through communication.

To avoid tiresome conflicts which could eventually ruin the marriage, the couple needs to allow love to bloom within the home. Both spouses need to let respect for each other flourish within the relationship. Love and respect can be cultivated by being tolerant, by putting forth as much effort as you can possibly give, and most of all, by trusting each other. And to build trust, the married couple has to cultivate honesty and understanding.

True communication within the relationship requires that both the husband and the wife seek to use verbal and nonverbal messages. True communication helps a couple overcome many challenges while maintaining a mutual understanding. The regular exchanging of thoughts and emotions is a good way to start.

By doing such a thing, you won’t only maintain a reasonable intimacy, but you will continue to win your spouse’s heart over and over again. The best thing in a relationship is when your spouse depends on you for both physical and emotional security. And this only becomes possible through effective communication.

Chapter 1: Understand the True Meaning of Perfect Relationships

There is nothing like a perfect marriage. Even the marriages that seem to be perfect