12 December 2003 Rev. Ronaldo P.

Togle Apostolic Jesus Name Church Agbay Road, San Antonio, San Pascual, Batangas

Dear Pastor: The objective of this letter is to advance my allegations, whi'ch I enumerate herewith, against the current pastor of AJNC, Calapan City, Marcial D. Paeste. I am a broken-hearted person . Yet, there is in me as a human being that constraints me to speak plainly regarding my convictions and my view of the situations. I cannot keep silent when so much trouble is at stake. I would go against this pastor's own inclinations and inhibitions. I trust I am not finding fault in him where there is no fault. I am unable to sympathize with this pastor because I believe him to be wrong by his own showing listed in the conclusions below. The wound was deep because the blade came from someone I trusted and respected, someone I was vulnerable to, someone I loved. My pain was inflicted by the stabbing of this pastor's tongue, which said things that were simply untrue. He had unjustly accused and mistreated me without cause or without giving me the benefit of the doubt. C'est plus qu'um crim trair. C'est une faute. C'est une escalandre. (To betray is worse than a crime. It is blunder. It is a scandalous conduct.) I know you do not condone this sin. Even so, I am appealing for a needed correction on the subject matter.

I do not intend to include other subjects because I wanted to comprehensively write on the subject mentioned. I wi II not discuss them here and they may be tackled further as the case Illay be or as ti me perm its. I would like to tell you that being an aggrieved party, I should go to this pastor privately and try to resolve these arguments according to what is instructed in Matthew 18: 15-18. I had made an attempt by sending a hand-carried letter through my brother-in-law, Joey Espinosa, on 15 July 2002. Because I had no financial means that time, I was convinced of the urgency to make this attempt, that is, to back down from flaring up, not necessarily to give in with the this pastor's accusations, but to break the matter off because I knew that it would only result to disastrous consequences. (Now, it is becoming evident.) I wrote every detail of the arguments to tell him of his faults with a motive not to fall out with him, but to clear out every argument between us. Sad to say, he did not reply. If he had only replied to me, things might be different as today. Well, I do not justify my retaliation, and this attitude is another subject not to be discussed here. Now, he is coming to me again with another backfire. He never stops pounding and smashing me with words. With this reason, I decided to reopen the case that was filed against me by this pastor on February 2002. In addition, I am presenting my complaints against this pastor's criticisms as follows:

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1. Criticism on my Managing of the Calapan Church Tithes. This pastor had criticized, whether directly or by implication, that I recorded in a column journal the local church tithes when I was assigned to minister in Calapan City. He mentioned to the church members that he was not obligated to do the same. (Of course, everybody is not obligated.) He commented that if he was asked to do the same thing, he would resign from the AJNC. The criticism was not really by rule. Such criticism degraded my esteem as the church members would see the differences between his leadership and mine. I believe that ministers have ways of their own different from each other and it is not wrong. I would respect his method; that is absolute. However, it is not beneficial to discuss confidential matters to church members. The comparison of methods would simply bring confusion to the people. My method had a bearing to my relationship to God then. His method was his relationship to God and whatever it was, it was none of my right to know, because it was his accountability to God. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; I desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period .
2. Criticism of my Private Life. This pastor discussed to the church members that he was not in favor with the way I treated my wife, just like the way he told me that he was not in favor with the way Brother Efren dela Cruz treated his wife, Sister Vicky. My life is as private as anyone's I ife. My treatment to my wife is in direct proportion to my treatment to myself because we are but one flesh. When my life is criticized, it is like passing through a "no trespassing" zone. It is none of his business. Any pastor is allowed to use lives of people as an example, a parable, a comparison, a simi Ie, a metaphor, an allegory, or an illustration, but please, no mentioning of names, naming names, or hitting below the belt. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; I desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period. 3. Complaint about the Missions Equipment. This pastor complained to church members about the retrieval of my personal belongings that were left in the Calapan church. He quoted that I verbally donated them to him and he was dismayed that I would take them from him. His quotation was in conflict with the missions equipment turnover letter to the Local Missions Department chairperson, Sister Ever Ober, of which he conformed with this letter, which states, "This confirms my turnover of the AJNC Calapan City's missions equipment and some personal items (declared herein as the property of the LMD) today, October 6, 2000 to Rev. Marcial D. Paeste. We requested to retrieve some of those personal items only on his convenient time, according to your memo, dated 30 August 2001, a year after our departure from Calapan City, and now more than three years ago. In the same memo, I donated other personal items to him. It is an obvious observation that if we discuss confidential matters to church members, it would only be disastrous by leading to misunderstanding and consequently reacting against it. I have given all of my precious and valuable things to the work, even my life. Why not some small and invaluable properties of mine? I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; I desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period.
/I

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4. Forbidding us to Exchange Text Messages. I am very well informed that I have to sever all association with the former congregation in order that incoming pastor may be able to properly pastor or shepherd the flock. We had settled this matter during my last attendance in "Beyond 2000" in Quezon City. However, this pastor forbade us (Brother Brando, Sister Weng and I) to exchange text messages. He even required the couple to show to him all our text messages. I was informed about his forbidding instruction during the couple's confusion stage. I replied to them to refrain text messaging on cases that were not according to the rule. His forbidding implied that something was evil or suspicious in our communication, when in fact we were communicating on prayer requests and comforting one another. We tried to behave by rule not to talk about anything against the ministry, or anything against him, in particular. There was a time when they were about to transfer to UPC for being offended by him. I encouraged them to go back, to submit to authority, and to pray for their pastor. However, take into consideration that during those times, they were about to rebel and text messaging was my only means to encourage them and warn them about rebellion. We were praying for him, which was the same time when he forbade us to exchange text messages. I suggest that you clearly explain to them why such action is prohibited rather than threaten them for a disciplinary action on the ground of disobedience to the pastor and consequently disobedience to God. We cannot obey a command, which we do not fully understand, to the point that disobedience means being restricted. Sheep do best when they are led, not driven; when they are released, not controlled; when they are loved, not shamed. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; 1 desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period. 5. Forbidding Us to Write Letters. This pastor took away for himself my first letter to Brother Fermin Castillo, dated April 17, 2002, and did not return it back without explaining the purpose except that that it was an order. My friend asked me the reason and 1 could not produce any because 1 did not know anything. I told him that it was but the pastor's way of caring for the converts. The pastor's investigation implied that he was suspicious for something evil in our communication. I may be wrong and kindly tell me if 1 was at fault. 1 searched the Scripture, the AJ NC by-laws and the ministerial ethics. 1 found no evil except that I should sever all association with them. Well, writing friendship letters does not mean associating at all. Let it be known to all that 1 have nothing against anybody as far as writing letters to Fermin Castillo is concerned. I can present to you all his letters and the duplicate of my letters for investigation purposes. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; 1 desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period. 6. This Pastor's Accusations against Me on February 2002. This pastor adduced to the allegations against me by supplying with four certified and signed testimonies from four witnesses/members . The allegations were as follows: 1. Visiting the Calapan Church without your permission on February 4, 2002 and during the absence of Marcial D. Paeste from the local church 2. Visiting the brethren in Oriental Mindoro Provincial Jail on February 4, 2002

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3. Visiting Sister Aida Vallada's residence on February 4, 2002 4. Prohibited text messages on February 7, 2003 5. Prophesying in the church with the absence of the local pastor 6. Knowing Brother Jun Mendoza's preaching ahead of time 7. Calling the people in Mindoro "plastic" 8. Telling my life's story, including my salary in Caltex and appliances owned, to church members 9. Speaking against the ministry 10. Allegation on speaking against the missions work and tithes 11. Being proud of the song, allegedly composed by myself, that was sang in Batangas He had jumped into conclusion when I dropped by the Calapan Church. He disputed

(suzefeo) with me, suborned (hupoba/lo) men, stirred up (sugkineo) people, and set up (hisfemf)
false witnesses. Does this sound familiar, eh? (This was similar as to how they stepped on Stephen.) I had explained and answered all the above allegations to you verbally and in writing. I suspected that there was really something fishy behind in the first place but nobody believed my testimony. This was the reason why I asked you in my letter, dated 21 February 2002. "Who was my accuser/complainant, the four members or the pastor?" I could perceive that he had a personal agenda behind the allegations. (prove me to be wrong.) This pastor had made himself an "agent provocateur" - one who employed to associate with the members of a group and, by pretending sympathy with their aims, lead them to commit overt illegal or harmful effects. Look at this: two witnesses asked for my forgiveness on September 2002 (a year ago) for testifying falsely against me because they (the witnesses) were forced to write false testimonies and to sign. They were threatened with discipl inary action if they refused. Last month, another witness/member revealed the same. That was the time I had revived my hope to make this matter become known finally. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; I desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period. 7. Preaching against Me. This pastor had erred in the fact that he preached from the pulpit against my integrity and image in such a manner that the whole church became acquainted with it. To mention some: a. I am a backslider, a rebel, or an enemy. b. The reason why I left the UPC was its leadership. c. I am persuading the AJ NC members to join the upc. d. I am inviting the AJ NC backsliders to upc. e. He is indignant with Brother Joey Espinosa. f. He is indignant with the mangyans. g. You could not touch me because I was having you blackmailed. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt; I desperately require an explanation from him personally and in writing after a reasonable period.

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CONCLUSIONS: Items 1, 3, 4 and 5 are minor problems. However, items 2, 6 and 7 are grave offenses. believe him to be wrong on five counts by his own showing listed below: 1. The prohibition to exchange text messages or to write friendship letters, and the allegations against such actions (like dropping by the church) without cause or without giving me the benefit of the doubt has shown himself to possess evil surmissings (thinking evil about someone, which includes jumping into conclusion, assuming evil things). It was displayed by criticism and gossip to accuse me being an innocent person based on some insignificant thing he has seen or heard or thought he saw or heard. 2. When he criticized my method of doing things and my passions by the comparing of our ministry to my disadvantage, he showed a spirit of envy or jealousy arise in his heart against me. He allowed a spirit of competition between us. Covetousness is displayed in the form of jealousy, hatred or evil-talking. 3. When he discussed my private life with other people, even to the point of preaching it, he showed himself to be a busybody who meddled in my private affairs and in things outside his authority. 4. He had mounted into the pulpit and impudently insulted me by holding up my faults or infirmities to public derision, to violate my sensibilities. He had worked to make sneering allusions to my absence from the organization. He was on political agendafor rail ing! Railing is abusing others by words, manifested by speaking evil of others, by constant criticism, and by slander. 5. Being an "agent provocateur" to dispute with me, suborn men, stir up people, and set up false witnesses is an evidence of being an extortioner who obtains favors, behavior, or promises by force, fraud, blackmail or other undue pressure. I am naturally hurt and offended. This is an out and out offensive, wanton, and unjustifiable to leave the word of God consistently wound and kill me by giving offensive additions to a weaker person like me. This is a devastating assault on my faith (not to mention if I had great faith, less faith or no faith at all) . The fight is killing me! I fear that it would drive me mad. Discouraged people do not need critics. They hurt enough already. They do not need more guilt or piled-up distress. They need encouragement. They need refuge, a place to hide and heal; not only praying people but a willing, caring, available someone; a confidant and comrade-at-arms. They need a sheltering tree to give relief in its cool shade; a massive trunk of understanding, which gives security as its thick leaves of love wash the face and wipe the brow. Beneath its branches have rested many discouraged souls! No limit. .. No conditions ... No bargains ... No reservations ... Not an "ami de cour." The preacher's task is to proclaim Scripture and give sense to it. All other content is extraneous. It is not appropriate to attack people for not conforming to biblical standards because that is not the purpose of preaching. As far as I know according to what you had taught me, the purpose of preaching is to lead people into a saving relationship with Jesus

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Christ, to confirm them in that relationship, and to motivate them to live according to the new way of life. The purpose is not to win an argument, to impress people with eloquence, to make people feel good, or to share our psychological, social, political, and cultural views. While the specific focus of preaching will vary, every message should In some way inspire the audience to believe in Jesus and to act upon that faith.

PETITION: I am coming to you through this letter with a petition not to allow the preaching of this pastor to be used against me or mention my name, that is, to degenerate it into scolding me. I would not indulge with whatever specific church method or discipline that you are about to do. It is church matter, I know. I am just asking you a favor to investigate all these arguments and it is up to you to judge the cause of stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother's way. I am only asking some help to give me some peace of mind as a citizen of this country, a human being, and sad to say, not an Apostolic. I am asking you neither to deal with my fau Its nor to comment on my reactions to the crises (as what you have recently said to my wife) because these would come later and this letter is not intended for them. I am desperate for answers on the subject matter and nothing more for the time being. I warn you not to sow doubt again on my esteem, image and integrity as a person like what you had previously done. (You did not set yourself to disprove their allegations nor deny their charges. Conversely, you did not negate my explanations. You had concluded: "Hindi ko masasabi na ikaw ay tama at sila ay mali. Hindi ko rin masasabing sila ay tama at ikaw ay mali." Two contradicting parties could neither be both correct nor be at false at the same time.) You had left me floating into nowhere with no answer, and nobody believed my testimony even my wife and my family. I was left feeling "depressed, alone, overlooked, spiritually on 'hold,' cold, and barren." And then, you concluded that the case was dismissed after all those wound incurred from being talked about in your meeting with the church deacons beyond my knowledge; after adding another slash from a deacon who shouted on my face; after bugging me down when the church was prepared for my restriction? Huh, is the verse on "having a merry heart doeth good like a medicine" a justification for not giving an answer to the problem? Mat Have your heart cut and bleed not the blood. Wear my shoes and show me if you can do the dancing! I am not in the position to teach you. Nevertheless, I suggest that you always seek out the sol uti on to the problem and encourage the aggrieved party to overcome rather than just endure it; to prevent the incurring of the wound rather than to cure the incurred wound. You may be tempted to take the way of least resistance and only offer comfort and prayer to someone in adversity rather than sincerely try to find the answer. To inspire a person to overcome is much preferred to offering comfort and encouragement to endure affliction and misfortune. In addition, cold logic may be correct in its judgment, but can never help the individual in trouble.

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Furthermore, I would like to take this opportunity to request the following, though outside of the subject matter but has an important implication to me on the present situation. You believe that one must not necessarily belong to a particular denomination in order to be saved, don't you? So, I request that the AJNC refrain from naming names, calling them rebels or tagging them rebellious, just for withdrawing from the organization for your advantage as you have traditionally done in ministerial seminars where I attended. (In that case, all of us are rebels because the AJNC withdrew from the old pastor of ACJC.) I request the AJNC refrain from giving bombarding criticism to the UPC because it gives no benefit at all. Let them alone. Let these things be put to silence. If withdrawing from the organization results in being disfellowshipped, this is another subject to be discussed and this letter is not intended to cover it. If a person is given the allegation of displaying the characteristics or sins stated in either I Corinthians 5:9-10, 2 Thessalonians 3:6, 11, 14, 1 Timothy 6:3-5 or 2 John 9-11, and without due process you have sentenced to refrain from eating with such people, have no contact with them, withdraw and have no company with them, not to receive and aid them, this is another subject to be discussed and this letter is not intended to cover it. However, in case it is allowable in your by-laws to handle such an argument between one of your pastors and me, who has withdrawn from the organization and called to be a "rebel," an "enemy," or a "backslider," I am appealing to the AJNC Board to make investigations within a reasonable time. I am willing to present the local church congregation of Calapan City including the three members who witnessed against me on February 2002 as my witnesses with their permission to adduce the allegations mentioned here. Furthermore, I am willing and ready to present the photocopies of four certified and signed testimonies from four witnesses/members, dated February 10, 2002, and the communications between Fermin Castillo and me (original and duplicate) to exhibit the truthfulness of my statement. Text messages have been deleted from our cellular phone and only the testimonies of the concerned people will prove our credibility. If this pastor accepts all these allegations and repents, he is pardoned. However, I will require him to make a public apology with my presence in Batangas and Calapan pulpits where he had offended me, and then make restitutions. If he does not accept all these allegations and does not repent, the fight is still on. After breaking the argument off, I have the intention to discuss other arguments and they may be tackled further as the case may be, as time permits, or if I do not get mad (hope I won't). After clearing out, I have the intention to move away to another place where nobody knows me, where nobody will look back to my past, where I would start anew. I have learned much.

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HEY! IT'S A FOUL PLA Y

A virelay made to convey gainsay does bewray.

Surely, it does not allay the heart but does dismay.

Whoever is trapped while on his way is a sure prey.
What a sunny day to anyone will become gray.

It puns anyone to death, sad to say.

So, I pray not to delay even ifI am away,
Or, astray if this is what you want to say.
He has to repay because it is a foul play.
Okay?

(written on 1 June 2002)

Ashimoto ni hi ga tsuku! Zen wa isoge.

Nelson P. Maranan

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