TASHA Utter silence. Thats how my heart sounded like. I was soaking wet, from the rain.

The rain pour heavily, as it somehow knows that my tears are also falling. I have always love the rain. The air smell heavenly and the frogs began to sing. But even as nature looks beautiful when it is raining, it was quiet. Too quiet. Perhaps the nature knew I was grieving inside. O Allah! Please give me strength! I told myself. Remembering Allah comforts me. Only with the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured. I smiled. Yet, my tears still flows with the rain and as I closed my eyes, the memory of what happened few minutes before began to fill my mind

Mira, there is something I want to talk to you about. I said with a quiver in my voice. Am I doing the right thing? Allah, give me strength to do what is right, I prayed. Mira was just about to close her door. Then, she walked to me and sat next to me on the bed. Whats wrong Tasha? Mira asked. You got that guilty look on your face. I am the one who should be sorry, remember? I totally forgot about our date in the park this evening. I am really sorry. It was just that Aiman just asked me out this morning. I cant wait to tell you what happened!!! He was..Wait, whats wrong Tasha? She gave me a questioned look. There must be something on my face that startled her. I took a deep breath and began. That is what I want to talk about. It is about you and Aiman Mira was suddenly quiet. I could swear I hear my own heartbeat. This is the time Tasha, I told myself. I have to tell her. Mira, you know that we had been best friends since we were in primary school and you know that I love you very much. I love you like my own sister. You are my best friend and we look out for each other, right? I looked straight to Miras eyes. Even though Mira was quiet, her eyes shows something different. A warning. But I brave my heart and continued, Mira, you have been going out with Aiman for over a year now and all this time I felt really guilty. Yes Mira, I am feeling guilty because I did not tell you this earlier. You know this is wrong Mira. This relationship with Aiman. Allah forbids us to have a love relationship before marriage. You know this. You Stop it Tasha! Just stop it! You do not know what you are talking about. You are just jealous of what I have with Aiman. . Aiman really loves me for who I am. We just want to get to know each other before we get more serius,she said with an angry tone. I tried to stay calm and said, Mira, if someone really loves you, he would see your parents first and ask permission to get to know you better. Islam does not forbid us to love, but Islam has already provide guideline how to love in a way that Allah loves. This with Aiman, is not real love in Islam. It was the last straw for her. She snapped. And we argued like we never had before. It was so bad that her mother came in to her room. She asked, Is everything alright here? I heard shouting and I came here to check Mira quickly answered. No mama, nothing is wrong here. Tasha was just about to leave, she said with a quiet look on me. Her mothers face was full of worry but she just said simply,Ohhalready? Well then, let me pack up a few things so you can gave it to your aunt She smiled at me with a concern look and left the room. We were both quiet. I looked at Mira and said, Mira, I was just No, I think thats enough Tasha. You should go now. You already know the front door, right? I think you can walk yourself out And as she turned her back at me, without looking on my face, she said, And I do not ever want to see you again Tasha. And at that time, my heart crashed and stopped. Only silence fill inJust silence

I opened my eyes. It was still raining. Is it me, or is it rains more heavily now? I sighed. I know it would not be easy, but still, it really hurts. Mira was always there for me, even when I lost my parents due to an accident. She always stayed at my side during hard times and good times. We even made a promise when we were young. Now, everything changes. I have to be strong, I told myself. There must be a reason for all of these. Allah knows best. Allah wants to show me something, something that will make me a better muslimah, a better person. There is always a blessing in disguise. I just have to open my eyes to find it. I smiled. Yes, there is still hope. O Allah! Give me strength and lead me and my loved ones to the right path. I am not giving up. Not yet. Suddenly, I coughed. Really bad. I had been having this cough for months now, but it is getting worse. I do not want to worry my aunt about this. My aunt had taken care of me since my parents died. She must have been worrying about me, coming back home in the dark. As I reach the door of my house, my aunt opened it before I can and pulled me in her embrace. Where have you been? And why are you soaking wet? I told you many times to bring an umbrella. It has been raining quite often now. I was just able to smile a little. She noticed, of course and asked, Are ok dear? I just shook my head and suddenly I coughed really badly. I cover my mouth with my hands and when I pull my hands, it felt warm and all I could see was red. Dark red. My own blood. And the room was spinning. Suddenly it was totally dark. The last thing I heard was my aunt screaming my name.

MIRA How could she said like that? We are not doing anything wrong. Aiman and I was just spending time together, to know each other better. Since Tashas last visit, I could not keep myself calm down. Somehow her words bother me. Maybe she is right. Whatever I have with Aiman is wrong, a little voice in my mind whispers. Stop it! I told myself. Nothing is wrong here. Tasha was probably jealous because I spend more time with Aiman than her. Yes, that is definitely the reason. But then I can see flashes of memory how Aiman teach me how to lie to my parents so I can just go out with him. How he avoided my question when I asked him when he is going to see my parents. And how he always hold my hand every time we go out together. Could it be I was wrong? Maybe I was blinded with what I thought was love but it was actually just purely lust. I panicked. What I have I done? Maybe Tasha is right. I felt tears welling up in my eyes. What is wrong with me? Then, I felt my heart raced. Something is not right, my heart whispered. Suddenly, my mom burst into my room. She said, Mira, its Tasha. She is in the hospital. And I felt my heart crushed and stopped. Only silence.Total silence

I was actually running. I want to get there as fast I can. My father stopped me and hold me while I cried and scream. I dont want to lose her. I dont want to lose my friend. It is ok Mira. Remember Allah my dear. Calm down. We are going to the hospital to see her, ok? Just calm downMy fathers words comforted me. When we reached the hospital, her aunt was sitting outside, looking distraught. I ran to her and embrace her. She hold me and looked at my parents and said, Encik Ibrahim, Puan Misha, Mira thank you for coming. Tasha passed out earlier. When we came, she was already in critical condition. But that is not the worst part. She was diagnosed with lung cancer. Stage four. And she cried. It is going to be alright Nora. Allah is with her. With us. Allah knows best. Lets keep praying, ok? We need to be strong for her. My mothers soothing words on trying to comfort her. As we all sat down outside the ICU, the doctor came out. And he did not bring good news. He said something. And all I could make out was that she is dying. Soon. I felt my strength crumbled. I am going to lose

her. I could feel my mothers hand holding, embracing me. Comforting me. O Allah! Give me strength! I prayed. The doctor said only one person can come and see her one at a time. So, we took turns. Her aunt first. Then it was my turn. As I walked in her room, I could see she was in a bad condition. How could all this time I did not realise she was losing so much weight? How could I not see that she looks paler and tired every time I see her? It was too late now. I come to her side and hold her hand. She opened her eyes and smiled with the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. Tears were already flowing upon my cheek. She said, You came. She said with so much difficulty I almost broke down. I said, Shhhdont say anythingyou have to rest. Of course I came. You are my best friend. I was chocking the words out. It was so difficult. She just smiled and said, My parents....just came visit me .They said they are going to take me home And she began to cry. I am so scared Mira.I hope all is well for me.Pray for me, she said weakly. And as I hold her hands, I whispered, Always Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un. Surely we belong to Allah and to him shall we return.That night Tasha left us. That night the rain pour heavily as my tears.

ENCIK IBRAHIM I peek into my daughters room and saw her reciting al-Quran. Alhamdulillah Many things had changed since Tasha left us. Tasha had always been close to Mira since they were young, thus making her feel like she is also a daughter to us. I still remember that day. After the funeral, Nora give her nieces al-Quran to Mira. She said that was Tashas last wish before she died that her al-Quran must be given to Mira. Mira took it quietly and shut herself in her room after the funeral. Then, not long after that, she come out and told my wife and I about her boyfriend. We both were surprised and frustrated. How could this happen? We educate her since she was young with Islamic values but had she not learn anything from us? I was so angry at that time and just want to yell at her but something in her face stop me from doing it. It actually stop both of us. Calmly, I asked her, So, what now Mira? She was quiet for a while and then said, I already broke up with him. It is over and would never happen again. You know the weird part is? I do not feel sad at all. It shows all this time what I have done is wrong. Tasha made me realised about it With the mention of Tashas name, her voice began to quiver. I found Tashas notes in her al-Quran. She wrote our promise when we were child. Did you know what it is? Its We both promise to be friends till Jannah. We promise to try our best to be a good muslimah so that in Jannah, we both can find ourselves as friends but I failed. I failed her and I failed Allah. And she cried. We both hold her. And with also tears in my eyes, I said, Mira, dear, did you know the beauty of Allahs forgiveness? That with each tawba we can become more nearer to Him and for you my dear, is the tawba of a muslimahMay Allah forgive us all my dear And now as I looked at her in her room, while holding my wifes hands, I prayed, O Allah! Guide us to the right path and may our tawba are accepted by You