Low Self-Esteem And Female Teenage

Girls
How can Teenage girls overcome low self-esteem











Christina Keys
Mrs.Lindinger
Senior Seminar
Feb 20,2014







Ashley Johnson thinks she is fat. When people joke with her she actually takes it to the
heart. Ashley looks in the mirror everyday pointing out of all her flaws, crying and calling
herself ugly. Ashley is beautiful, she does not see it, unfortunately. Her ninth grade year, her first
year of high school, everyday she would just talk about how pretty girls are and would compare
herself. Later on in the school year she had a boyfriend who was in the 10th grade. She never
took him serious though because she used to always ask, why would he want to make her his
girlfriend when theyre prettier girls he could talk to? No matter how much he would tell her
how beautiful she is and loved her flaws, she could never believe him. Although Ashley felt like
she was the only one with this problem she is really not its called Low Self-Esteem and it is very
common.
Self esteem is as an evaluation of the self-concept that consists of positive and negative
appraisals (Rosenberg,1996) Low self esteem is the opposite, it means constantly putting
yourself down, isolating yourself from everybody, and being ashamed of yourself (Citation
needed). How can females overcome low self-esteem? First, females with low self-esteem should
have positive relationships so that they can get positive feedback from friends and family.
Secondly, a professional counselor can provide therapy which helps people who suffer from low
self-esteem deal with internal and external issues. Lastly focusing on self improvement, such as
lifting yourself up, can improve self-esteem.
There is a great deal of research about self-esteem and adolescent females. According to
Jasmine Denise Rogers article The Truth about Low Self-Esteem and How We Can Help Our

Daughters Overcome It written on June 13, 2013 one main cause for poor self-image among
women in the United States can be blamed on a variety of different factors from pressures from
the media. This article found that 75% of eight and nine year olds like their looks, but it drops to
56% once girls reach the age of 12 and 13. Anita Gurians article, Girls with Low Self-Esteem
published on August 30, 2013 discusses how among 5-12th graders 47% said they wanted to lose
weight because of magazine pictures. Secondly she explains that health risks accompany girls
drop in self-esteem due to risky eating habits, depression, and unwanted pregnancy. Another
article by Anea Bogue titled Girl Power expresses that as girls become sexually active low
self-esteem becomes a catalyst for risky secual behavior that often results in STDs, pregnancy
and deep emotional scars. Further research confirms that females with low self-esteem most
commonly receive less praise and more criticism from either parent. Lastly, according to Fredric
Neuman M.D. in Low Self-Esteem published April 14, 2013 people with low self-esteem
blame themselves for everything. He also explains how they are suffering from a chronic low
level depression which does not respond to antidepressant drugs. Lastly, he also says that people
with low self-esteem will feel poor in social situations including dating, and will be unable of
accomplishing any demanding work. Clearly low self-esteem is a major problem that has many
other damaging effects for people who suffer from this condition.
Females develop low self-esteem because either they feel like they do not get enough
attention, keep saying they are ugly, and comparing themselves to celebrities or other people.
The American Association of University Women in 1990 reported marked declines in girls self
confidence during the early adolescent years. This makes sense because in elementary school
girls do not pay attention to their appearance but in High School all of that becomes so much
more important. Carol Gilligan in 1990 reported that girls lose confidence in their ability to

express their needs as their self esteem worsens. Low Self-Esteem is a major problem and needs
to be handled and taken seriously.
The media plays a part in why girls develop low self-esteem. Amanda Von Schlegel
stated, The media puts such an intense pressure on young girls today to look like the ideal
image. Popular networks such as facebooks, twitter, and instagram can ruin girls self esteem.
If a girl see another girl get a lot of likes on her picture post and she did not the girl would take
that in and start to question her own looks. A lot of teenage girls like to watch tv and read about
celebrities. If a girl sees a celebrity and thinks they are real pretty they will do anything to
change their appearance to look like the celebrity and will try to mimic their body language.
According to Clean Cut Media, since childhood teenage girls are influenced by the media, seeing
the beautiful celebrities and the models, while magazines tell them to look prettier and lose more
weight, to become the skinny perfect women. These repeated messages can brainwash
adolescent girls making them believe that they will only be pretty or liked if they copy what they
are seeing in the media. However, what these young girls should know is that even some
celebrities suffer from self-esteem issues.
When you think about celebrities you would think that their life is almost close to perfect.
You might imagine that they do not deal with the same problems as people who are not fortunate
but they do! Many people would be surprised to learn that celebrities have low self-esteem
because they have money and could change their appearance. For example, Demi Moore had low
self-esteem and she once said in an interview, What scares me is that I am going to ultimately
find out at the end of my life that I am not really lovable, that I am not worthy of being loved,
that there is something fundamentally wrong with me and that I was not wanted in the first
place. ( Evelyn, January 9,2012). Only a person who had very low self-esteem would ever

think they were unlovable. You would not think that somebody so wealthy could feel that of
way about themselves, but money does not always bring you happiness. Just like people from
different classes suffer from low self-esteem, different races also have self-esteem problems.
Self Esteem issues are different depending on the females race. For example, according
to Portia E. Adams, African American adolescent females possess higher self-esteem than any
other racial or ethnic adolescent female group. She also found in her research that black
adolescent females reported less self-depression than white females. This recent research is
different from what was found in the early part of the 20th century. Early 20th century social
scientist proposed that Black Americans struggled with self-esteem issues more than white
americans. In 1940 two sociologist, Kenneth and Mamie Clark, asked black children about two
dolls who looked exactly the same only one was white and one was a black doll. Most kids
thought the white doll was nicer. The kids were in the ages of six to nine. Mr. Clark asked
questions such as Show me the doll that you like the best, or that you would like to play with?
or Show me the doll that looks bad. Mr. Clark gave the test to 300 children in different parts
of the country. Black children that went to segregated schools or were separated by race most
likely picked the white doll as the nice doll.(Abagond, may 29,2009) This experiment proves that
black little kids did not even pick their color race doll, suggesting that they may not have high
self-esteem since they chose to play with a doll of a different race. No matter your race or your
class status there are several things that adolescent girls can do, to improve their self esteem.
Having positive relationships is the first way to improve your self-esteem. Too many
teenage girls, trying to fit in would change everything about themselves just to feel liked or be
popular. Instead, they should be surrounding themselves with people who make them feel good
about who they are. Young teenage girls should know that everybody was created in their own

special way. If somebody does not like you for who you are or just because you do not have what
they have, they do not need to be apart of your life. If you dress different, or look different, that
does not make you any less of an important person. Portia E. Adams states For both Black and
White girls, support from ones peers and family is essential for the successful transition through
adolescence. Several studies have reasoned that the more relationships an individual has, the
higher their self-esteem will be. (Cutrona, Suhr & MacFarlane,1990;Eckenrode & Washington,
1990; Pierce, Sarason, & Sarason,1990). In other words, always surround yourself with people
who want to motivate and boost you up, not people that bring you down. This is just the first
way to improve self esteem, positive self-talk is also important.
Focusing on self-improvement can also raise adolescent females self esteem. According
Saul McLeod, People with high self-esteem focus on growth and improvement but people with
low self-esteem focus on not making mistakes in life. (Saul Mcleod, 2012). This quote suggests
that people with low self-esteem expect themselves to be perfect, when in reality everyone
makes mistakes. It also means that if you have low self-esteem you expect yourself to make a
mistake, rather than expecting yourself to be successful. There is no way to feel good about
yourself, when you only expect bad things to happen. Saul Mcleod writes People with low
self-esteem tend to exaggerate events as being negative, such as taking non critical comments as
critical. According to Rosenberg and Owen People with low self-esteem most likely
experience social anxiety and low levels of interpersonal confidence. (Rosenberg and
Owen,2001).
Research has also shown that low self-esteem is linked to increased teenage pregnancy.
Guindon (1996) asked school counselors to list five characteristics that best fit students with low
self-esteem. Such as insecure, poor self image, unhappy, lack self confidence, or poor

communication. Low self esteem in children tends to be related to physical punishment and from
parents not showing their kids love. Children with low self-esteem depend on coping strategies
that are counterproductive such as bullying, quitting, cheating, avoiding and etc. (Saul Mcleod,
2012).

In order to overcome low self-esteem its necessary to take away the cycle that you keep
on repeating. CBT also known as Cognitive Behavior Therapy is an ideal approach for tackling
low self esteem because it provides a clear framework for understanding how low self-esteem
developed and why it keeps on going on. CBT focuses on the thoughts, opinions, and your
beliefs (www.overcoming.co.uk). Low self- esteem keeps on going because people with low
self-esteem makes demands that are impossible to accomplish. Such as never going into a
situation that you think you would never fail (www.overcoming.co.uk).
According to overcoming.co.uk A person with low self-esteem may not know that with
the experiences you had went through in life, and how the experiences gives you the messages
about the kind of person you are. If a person experience negative situations then your beliefs
about yourself will be negative too. Its so many different things that causes low self -esteem
sometimes it can come from childhood experience like systematic punishment, neglect abuse, not
meeting your parents expectations, or being the odd one in your household or at school.

When you have no control over no situations that comes from low self-esteem. Therapists
works with people to see the reasoning on why they have low self -esteem, and once they see the
reasoning. Then the therapists sets goal so they can gain control over themselves back and help
them feel empowered. Especially for teenage females a lot of their low self-esteem comes from
relationships. Some may feel like they are worthless. For example a girl name Jodi is 22 years

old she has low self esteem. She went to therapy because she felt depressed because of her
relationship with her father. When Jodi is in therapy it helps her understand her emotions. This is
a natural response to a crazy childhood. Now Jodi is able to evaluate her weaknesses and
strengths. (goodtherapy.org) Some girls do not want a lot of people in their business so therefore
they would not think that counselling would be helpful but really it is. Therapist help their
patients stop criticizing themselves unfairly. Second thing a therapist should do is to help
patients accept their real weakness,mistakes, and failures. Next thing they should do is help their
patients talk about the criticisms from others and try to convince the patient that the negative
things that been said were wrong.Sometimes its best for a therapists patient to tell exactly what
the patient was being criticized about. A person thats suffering from low self-esteem can actually
misinterpreted a compliment as a criticism. When you're so used to hearing negative things and
thinking that everything that somebody says to you is negative that can be your mindset.
(www.naj-act.org/self.htm)
According to Milton Splett many therapist patient need help with skill training and the therapist
must have skills to teach to their patients. Mr.Hilston also says low self-esteem causes people to
avoid situations which may evoke their feelings of low self-esteem but avoiding situations
prevents people with low self esteem from developing skills which help them achieve success
and self-acceptance. Another step Milton has is that he says help them be more open about
their weaknesses, mistakes, and failures. When they hide their weaknesses, and their mistakes
this intensifies their feelings of low self-esteem and shame. Basically what Milton is saying if a
person does not talk about how they failed something or what makes them feel weak they feel
ashamed about it and it can damage them in the inside. (Milton Spett, October 2005).
They have a camp for girls that wanna build their self-esteem up. The camp is called Building

Girls Self-Esteem Up Through Wilderness Therapy. One building activity that they have that i
thought would be good for teenage girls is that they learn how to assert themselves without being
passive and aggressive and learn to respect each other without teasing, bullying, manipulating or
engaging in other negative peer interactions. They also discuss power and control in their
relationships with friends and boyfriends, and learn how to set healthy boundaries. (Meto ghan
Vivo)
According to one of the counselors she states Each girl relies on the other member of her
group to carry their share of the workload, and knows others are likewise relying on her, earning
the respect and admiration of others can be a real confidence booster. At the end of the Aspen
Achievement Academy wilderness program for teens each students parents join them in the
wilderness, putting teens in the role of caretaker. This experience helps solidify the growth they
have experienced and gives the teens and their parents an opportunity to feel proud of their
accomplishments. (Meghan vivo) Which is a good thing because I stated before positive
feedback from their family helps young girls self esteem goes up.
According to DR.Carol article Girl Talk With Dr.Carol more defined social groups and
cliques from where peers become a major influence on a childs self-esteem. DR. Carol states
that adolescents spend more time in classrooms with kids their age than at home with their
family members. If a teenage girl feels bad about themselves they will most likely make bad
choices in life. DR carol shares a few things that can lead to teenagers having low self-esteem.
Either being criticized by peers or from an adult figured . Bullying and being ignored also plays a
role into a teenagers low self esteem. IF another teenagers or adults tell them about their self
image such as too tall,too short, different hair, braces , too thin, etc. My thesis teenage girls can
overcome low-self esteem implementing positive feedback into their lives. one key point would

be therapy if its serious issues could be internal or external it is not for everybody. Second key
point would be positive feedback from family or just positive feedback period. My third key
point would be positive self-talk lifting yourself up. Lastly my fourth key point is self
improvement.

To Close, there are many ways that females can overcome their self -esteem.No It does
not work overnight you have to be willing to put in the time and effort to get rid of it. A lot of
people does not speak on low self-esteem or make it seem like it is a major problem but it is major
problem and need to be fixed as soon as possible.



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Journal of Black Psychology
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Reprints and permission: http://www.
sagepub.com/journalsPermissions.nav
DOI: 10.1177/0095798410361454
http://jbp.sagepub.com


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