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The memories I have from that night are only from much hours later, of the early morning, and
I have them as flashes. I recall one specific moment in which Leonardo was in a bed with me
and he was kissing me. I had no idea about what was going on. I was complete torpid, I could
not feel my body nor rightly perceive situation. I must have lost consciousness again as I have
a blackout from this moment onwards, until another clear memory of two-second long
moment of sexual intercourse. Of being raped. And after this I blacked-out again.
Then I remember another few seconds: somebody had started knocking at the door.
Leonardo responded, just a second he aid, and started dressing up. I lost consciousness
again.
I finally woke up on 19 July 2013. I was feeling numb, confused and sick. It wasn't like a
hangover, but more like I was intoxicated with something. I looked around and figured out I
was nude and I was in Leonardo M.'s bed. His mother was sitting next by and was solving
crosswords. At that point I realised Leonardo was there too. He asked me if I wanted a towel
to cover myself. I nodded.
I went to the room Marzena was in, she was awaken, I know I must have packed by things, at
that point, but I dont remember how and when. We had a ride fixed with BlaBlaCar.com
service, a guy who gave us a ride until Pesaro, Italy. I slept during the whole trip, I was so
tired. Marzen woke me up when we got there about 10 pm. In Pesaro we were hosted by
another couchsurfer, who was nice to us. When I got up the next morning I finally started to
realise something very bad had happened to me at Leonardos. But I was not yet aware I had
been raped. I felt weird about remembering, and decided not to think about it. I was back
home only on 25 July 2013.
At that point I decided I had to write to Leonardo and ask him what had really happened. And
that is the moment he admitted we had sex, but he made me think it was my fault, that I
wanted it, that there was attraction between us. He also proposed me, and I decline. I asked if
I would be pregnant, he said not to worry about that. I was desperate, I felt broken inside, I
would never have sex with a man I dont like, a dont love. I felt nobody would want me after
that.
In September Marcia managed to find Marzena and asked her if something weird had
happened to us. Marzena immediately told me, and asked if something happened to me
there. That is the moment I admitted to her and myself: I was sexually used against my will. I
was raped. We entered the online forum Marcia created and started to seek all information
possible on Leonardo and try and get organised to denounce him.
I also spoke to Lisa, the Asian girl who was Leonardos girlfriend at the time we were there.
They had also met via Couchsurfing, he told us. I wanted to ask if something bad happened
to her. She said it was weird that she also felt dizzy once there, and was very sorry about
what had happened to me. But we never spoke further.
At the beginning of October 2013 I went to the Polish Police to file a denounce. My filing was
sent to the local Prosecutor Office, that dismissed the case soon after because of no
evidence found. Today we can finally talk to an Italian Prosecutor Office about it.