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Personal Developmental Profile

July 10, 2013

Kristy S. Garner, EdS

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I want to start off this paper by stating how much I really dislike this
assignment and not because I am lazy or do not want to do the work. I have pretty
much made myself a career student which should prove that the work itself does
not scare me. I have avoided making myself examine my past, not so much
because of the things that others have done, but simply because it will be hard for
me to face that I am who I am today because of myself and I cannot blame it on
anyone else. There are things that have occurred in my past that I simply do not
talk about because I want to forget they even happened. Thinking about the past
brings up pain and it makes me uncomfortable. I have feared having to talk about
such and I guess this fear is about to come to fruition.
I.

Early and Middle Childhood (birth to age 12)

Physical
I have always been short and I have heard every short joke you can imagine.
Last to know when it rains (yes, that whole millisecond makes all the difference)
could you pick that up, youre closer (sure, because I love doing the things that no
one else wants to do) Theresa (my moms name from whom I get my height)
I am also white, and not just Caucasian, I am talking Casper the Ghost (which was a
nickname given to me by a boy in 6th grade just before I kicked him between the
legs). Let us just say that I am not fond of Theresa or Casper as nicknames.
Emotional
My parents said that I was always a happy child as an infant and toddler. I
also loved my big brother and wanted to do whatever it was that he was doing. I
cried when I was hungry, needed my diaper changed, or if I hurt myself. While I do

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not remember my emotional state at a very early age, I do remember things from
about first grade on.

Cognitive (Educational)
My mother was a stay-at-home mom so anything I learned at an early age
was from her. I attended kindergarten back when it was only for a half day. I then
continued at the same Sprague Elementary school through third grade when
everyone then transferred to Haynes Elementary. The new elementary school was
located in a bad section of town and I remember not liking the year I spent there.
I was happy when the following year my old school, Sprague, added 4 th and 5th
grades. I always earned honor roll and I always earned perfect attendance.
Social Factors
Birth to age five, my friends consisted of those at church and ones in the
neighborhood. My first best friend was a girl my age by the name of Jessica
Thorne. She lived two doors down and she was the sweetest friend who I absolutely
adored. I was very sad and heartbroken when she moved away. I have not seen
her since I was six, but I have tried looking her up on Facebook to no avail.
Once I entered school, obviously my array of friends multiplied. I had Erin
Drake as my best friend (our mothers were good friends too) and in sixth grade I
also met Michele Stevens and we instantly clicked. While I had a lot of great
friends, there was also one girl who bullied me endlessly. Her name was Jaime
Thomas and I was so excited the day her parents placed her in private school and I
never had to look at her again! I later found out that she got pregnant in high
school by a ranger and dropped out to get her Graduation Equivalency Diploma

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(GED). She began cosmetology school, but dropped out of that as well because it
was too hard. I always think of her whenever I hear the Grease song Beauty School
Dropout. She also got a divorce and had to move back in with her parents and
newborn child. I know it is probably wrong, but it always makes me smile to hear
that she faced such hardships because of pain she caused me throughout school.
Events
My Dad told me about the day I was born. He said that back then the fathers
were not allowed in the delivery room. He had just sat down to drink his coffee and
read the paper when the nurse came in with a crying baby and asked him what they
wanted. He stated that they wanted a little girl, so the nurse opened my legs and
asked if that was good enough. My earliest recollection is also tied into our family
tradition of reading the story of Jesus birth on Christmas Eve right before we
opened our gifts. My favorite toy was a baby doll in a blue dress that my
Grandmother gave me (of which I still have). My favorite book was Put Me In the
Zoo by Robert Lopshire (which is now my sons favorite as well).
During Vacation Bible School (VBS) when I was 9 years old, I accepted God
and got baptized. This decision was the most important event of my life because it
solidified my relationship with God and my eternal life in Heaven.
My grandfather passed away when I was 10 years old and it was the first
time I had ever seen a dead person and attended a funeral. I remember being sad,
but I did not cry. I do remember a couple of nights later my Grandfather appeared
to me in what I thought were a dream. He told me that he loved me and called me
by a nickname that he gave me and only he called me, Leaner belle. I never
understood where it came from, but I liked the unique name.
In seventh grade I auditioned for the middle school cheerleading squad. I

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worked so hard at it and really wanted to make the team. The night came where we
were to get phone calls if we made the cut. I remember waiting anxiously and
excitedly while my mother killed my spirits by constantly stating that I was not good
enough and probably would not make the team. In her mind, I suppose, she was
trying to prepare me for the worst. A half hour passed and I got the call that I
made the squad and the following year I was made a captain. I proceeded to make
the softball team as a captain and the soccer team as a captain. I also became
president of the Beta Club and joined the Student Council and Science Clubs.
Experiences in meeting and resolving psychosocial crisis (as described
by Erikson)
II.

Adolescence (ages 13 19)

Physical
The shortness still remains, although I discovered shoes with clunky heals
that were easy to walk in and would add a couple of inches to my height which felt
like ten feet. Looking back, I was very skinny in middle school and high school
although I never felt like it. I always felt so huge. By the end of my senior year, I
went up a size to a 7/8 and my first year in college I was in a 9/10. Obviously I now
felt enormous, which was still very skinny (at least now compared to my size 16/18).
Emotional
Adolescence proved to be the most emotional time for me where I just did not
have anyone to talk to about what I was going through and there are things that
only my husband knows about which affects my outlook on life. I would go to
school, go to work, and go straight home with a very small social life. My friends
had a lot of things and experienced a lot more than I got to do.
Cognitive (Educational)

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I graduated fourth in my class of over 200 at Groves High School. I was
always in the Advanced Placement (AP) courses which were for college credit and
earned straight As. I never understood why I did not get Valedictorian because I
was in AP courses getting As and the three people ahead of me were in the lowest
level courses getting As. Their As were obviously higher than my As, but my
courses were a lot more strenuous. I was a lot more concerned with getting the
college credit so I would not have to pay for it later.
I entered Armstrong State College while living at home because that was
the decision my parents made for me. I began as a Physical Therapy major, then
changed to Pre-Pharmacy, and later landed at Physical Education (PE) teacher. After
realizing how difficult it would be to get a highly sought after job, I changed to a
Math and Science teacher which I loved. My brother was a teacher and my parents
pushed for me to go in the same direction. I fought it for a while, but determined
that teaching really was where I wanted to be.
Social Factors
After being named a captain of the cheerleading squad, I became very
popular although I did not realize it until adulthood. I did not realize the difference
between being popular and being in the in crowd. I was popular in that a lot
of people knew me by name and knew who I was. I also had a lot of boyfriends of
which I would get tired of after a month or so and had to get rid of. I was not in the
in crowd which was comprised of the wealthier kids who liked to go partying,
drinking, drugs, and sex. In adulthood I found out just how popular I was as I
attended my first class reunion and a lot of people knew me that I just did not know.
I would also run into people at the store who would hug my neck and carry on a

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conversation with me, but again, I did not know who they were. I would have to go
home and look through the yearbook just to get an idea of who they were.
I started college the summer after high school because I did not want to
chance being in classes with anyone from high school. I wanted to start over with
my social life and it worked. I met a lot of new people and I began attending the
Baptist Student Union (BSU) which is where I found my click and became best
friends with my childhood friend, Justin Blakey and a new kid, Kevin Kerns. I also
became very close with a Canadian girl named Emily Downey and I began my first
long term relationship of two and a half years with John Hardison.
Events
I had quite a few events in high school which I feel had an impact on me as a
person. I was proud of myself for lettering all four years in softball and in all four
academic areas (our school gave out letters for achieving a certain grade in
academics). I also earned a Rotary sweater for being in the top ten percent of my
class academically. These achievements made me believe that I would be able to
attend college successfully and gain productive employment in the future.
My first job was a pharmacy technician at Carters Pharmacy in Pooler, GA.
I really enjoyed the time I spent there, however, I simply worked the register and
cleaned. I was very excited when I was first provided with the opportunity to fill
prescriptions I loved it. I was then moved to the Institutional Pharmacy where I
learned to actually make the drugs and I fell in love with my job. I vividly remember
the day when the pharmacist asked me to join him in the clean room. I was 19
years old and I always dreamed of working in the clean room. This opportunity
proved that I was a reliable and trusted employee as it was the most tedious and
precise job. I had to scrub up and wear a clean suit which I had to get help

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putting on by a co-worker because I was so nervous. I remember being in awe as I
entered the room and began to get trained on the proper technique for drawing
liquid out of a vial with a needle without getting bubbles. I also learned how to
make IVs and putting together the chemotherapy medication. I was falling deeper
in love with pharmacy.
While I had a lot of positives in my life through school and attaining my first
job as a pharmacy technician, I also had some rough situations. I dated a boy
named Jason Mitchell my senior year and he began to also tell me how fat I was
getting and that no one else would ever love me but him. He would get jealous any
time I wanted to visit with my female friends and he eventually resorted to hitting. I
was so incredibly stupid for staying with him for the two months and I look back
thinking, Why did I not stop him from treating me this way? He always pressured
me to have sex and he finally broke up with me because he realized that I was not
going to give in. He immediately (the very next class period) started dating a girl
who had a reputation of being easy. Senior year I was also faced with the
opportunity to do ecstasy on our class trip to Disney World, but I refused. I saw the
little pill with the smiley face and I saw the effects on the boys that took the drug. I
was scared for them, but I felt that whatever happened to them, they deserved it
for being stupid and taking drugs.
In college I re-dedicated my life to Christ on Super Bowl Sunday and decided
to make sure my students would always see God in me whenever I became a
teacher. My first serious boyfriend was one that I thought I would end up
marrying. He was incredibly smart and went to Georgia Tech to be a computer
engineer where he earned a 4.0. He was also a dedicated Christian and whenever
he came home for the weekends and holidays, we would spend a lot of time with

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our BSU friends and family. I eventually broke up with him because I found myself
falling out of love. While he was so smart when it came to computers and books, he
was lacking in the common sense department and I found this very unappealing. I
began to see just how different we were in areas that mattered the most. He did
not have a strong work ethic which I discovered is very important to me. He also
did not have much discipline when it came to finances and spent whenever he
wanted. These two concerns were areas of our lives that I simply could not live with
so I broke it off with him two weeks before he was going to propose to me. Nine
months later, he was married to a girl that he had been cheating on me with for the
last six months of our relationship.
Experiences in meeting and resolving psychosocial crisis (as described
by Erikson)
I remember feeling alienated and alone when I was at home. I realized
that I had this secret about my home life that no one knew about and I just wanted
someone to see something so it would all be out in the open. While I felt alone at
home, I did have a sense of belonging as I joined all of the sports teams, clubs, and
becoming more active in our church youth group. I also experienced my first job in
a pharmacy and felt as though this would be my life-long career because I was good
at it and I enjoyed the institutional pharmacy.
III.

Young Adulthood (ages 20 middle/late 20s)

Physical
I am still short, but now I am short, fat, and miserable. Every year that
passes by is another year that I gain weight. I am a size 12/14 by the time I get
married and I gain up to a size 22/24 by my late 20s (I eventually start to take
control of my weight over the last year and I am now back to a 16/18 and

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continuing to lose). I am so upset with myself that I one day just have enough. I
decide that I can be beautiful and sexy at whatever size and I begin to take pride in
the way I looked, even at a bigger size. I begin to wear make-up and buy more
expensive clothing which looked better on me. I also get a more hip hairstyle and
I take pride in the improvement.
Emotional
My parents claim that I only focus on the bad things that happened in my
childhood, and a lot of positives happened that I need to remember. The honest
truth is that I know I had a lot of positives, but they are pushed into the shadows
because even in the good times, I was still thinking about the negatives.
I began to experience true happiness and ignoring the pain from my past
when I met my now husband, Jamey Garner. He was everything I wanted in a man
and is understanding when it comes to dealing with my family. He has to be a
keeper to put up with everything. I trust him in all areas of our lives and we were
virgins on our wedding day.
Cognitive (Educational)
I graduated from Armstrong Atlantic State University in 2000 with a
bachelors degree in Middle Grades Education after three years, of which was paid
for by the Hope Scholarship. I could not wait to get into the work force and honestly
thought that my mother would treat me better once I was in my career. I decided
that I would have more job security with the more certifications that I earned, so I
began my life-long learning process. I became certified in early education, math,
science, and social studies. In one year I completed my masters degree in Middle
Grades Education from Armstrong Atlantic State University where I also completed
the courses for a Reading Endorsement. I remember wanting to get a masters in

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school counseling, but I chose Middle Grades Education because the Teacher Hope
Scholarship paid for the degree in full. My brother and I then set out to earn a
Specialist degree in Teaching and Learning from Georgia Southern University which
took us two years. We earned loan forgiveness for this degree because we had
been teaching in a Title I school for more than five years. I also began my
certification in Media Specialist and a Doctorate in Curriculum Studies from Georgia
Southern University. I quit after a year because my husband and I received our
second child. Thankfully I am about to complete my Media Specialist and now I am
beginning my School Counseling degree (and having to pay for the first time).
Social Factors
I became much closer with my cousin, Stephanie Zettler, because my parents
were okay with me spending time with family. Stephanie introduced me to the
party scene in downtown Savannah, although I did not partake in drinking alcohol
because I simply did not have the desire. I did like dancing and hanging out with
friends. My early 20s proved to be a time where I was transitioning from college to
career and my friend preference was shifting as well. I was spending more time
with colleagues at work and friends at church than those from college. I still
remained best friends with Justin and Kevin, but Emily and I drifted far apart. She
moved to Atlanta and became a much different person that I no longer wanted to be
in contact with. Even to this day Justin, Kevin, and I still talk and hang out with our
spouses.
Events
There have been a few big events which changed my life in adulthood. The
first event would have to be getting my teaching job at Effingham County Middle
School (ECMS) which is also where my brother teaches. I also earned my masters

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and specialist degrees in my 20s. The most defining moment of my life would
definitely have to be when I chose to move out of the house with my parents and
into the house with my cousin, Stephanie. I simply told my parents that I would be
gone when they returned from their trip to visit my aunt, and I kept my word. It was
the best decision of my life because I finally learned about whom I was and what I
was capable of accomplishing by myself. My relationship also began to improve
with my mother as the distance was wonderful. The next big event would have to
be meeting and marrying my husband and then the adoption of our two sons, Travis
and Lucas.
Experiences in meeting and resolving psychosocial crisis (as described
by Erikson)
I dealt with issues of identity in several ways during young adulthood. I
would say that the most confusing time of my life was the period between
graduating college and teaching my first couple of years. I still wanted to be with
my college friends, but due to conflicts in schedule and location, I chose to make
more friends at work where we had more in common. I was also single during this
time and trying to find out who I was as a person instead of being identified as
Johns girlfriend, Lonnie and Theresas daughter, or Tonys sister. As I got engaged, I
struggled with giving up my last name because I felt comfortable being Kristy Sikes.
I knew who Kristy Sikes was and what she stood for. To take on the name Garner
would also mean to take on all that came with it. I knew that I would take my
husbands name, but I just struggled with taking on the new identity of being
Jameys wife. I wanted to make Jamey proud of me as his wife and I wanted to be
the same person as a Garner that I was as a Sikes. In the end, I feel that I am a
happy and successful person who is very blessed to have the family that I have, the

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home we live in, and the friends that we share.