Writing an Extended Definition

The Task
Select an important value or concept that lies at the heart of an issue you care
about deeply, including an exploration of the terms various applications and
explanation of all that term means to you.

Prewriting:
To get started writing there are some questions to consider before you start:
1.
2.
3.
4.

What are the key values that are at the center of an issue that you care deeply about?
What concept is important for the audience to understand in order to comprehend the issues?
What complication arises in your issue that needs defining because it is often misunderstood?
How do this values or concepts connect to your life? If you care about them, why should your
audience?
5. Is your concept or value an abstract noun?
Narrowing the General Topic to a Specific Term
After selecting your issue and either a concept or value, make sure it is narrow enough to write a short
essay about the topic: for example, the term celebrity is probably too broad a topic for a brief essay, but
the topic can be narrowed to a particular type of celebrity, such as a sports celebrity, Hollywood celebrity,
local celebrity, or political celebrity. When your focus is narrower, then you can pull specific examples,
like Joni Ernst or Bill Clinton, to illustrate the characteristics of sports celebrities.
Try one of the following strategies to find a suitable narrowed term for your definition essay.
1.

Use a branching diagram or clustering to classify the general topic into specific categories.
Choose the category that you are especially interested in or familiar with.
2. Think of someone who might serve as an example of the general topic and consider focusing your
definition essay on that person.
3. Discuss your general topic with classmate to come up with specific terms related to it.
Considering your Audience and Point of View
When your audience is unfamiliar with a term, you will need to present detailed background information
and define all specialized terms that you use. Think about your intended audience at the end of the
semester. As you develop your essay, keep the following questions in mind.
1. What, if anything, can I assume my audience already knows?
2. What does my audience need to know to understand or accept my definition?
In addition, consider which point of view will be most effective for your essay. Third person sometimes
conveys authority and distance, first person sometime conveys personality and connection.
A writer may use negation explaining what term is not as well as what it is to show how the term is
different from the other terms in the same class. For example, in an essay defining rollerblading, you
might clarify how it is unlike roller skating, which uses a different type of wheeled boot that allows
different kinds of motions.
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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.

You can use negation to clarify personal meaning relaxing may me something to you that it does not
mean to your audience.
Also, make sure to address popular misconceptions about the term being defined.
Identifying Distinguishing Characteristics and Supporting Details
Usually, a brief or standard definition is the kid found in a dictionary and consists of three parts:

The term itself

The class to which the term belongs
The characteristics that distinguishes the term from all others in its class

For example:

Wedding band is a piece of jewelry

Jewelry is the class or group of objects that include wedding band
To show how a wedding band differs from other members of the class, you would need to define t
distinguishing characteristics the details that make it different from other types of jewelry: it is a
ring, often made of gold, that is exchanged during a marriage ceremony.

To write a standard definition, use the following guidelines:

1. Describe the class as specifically as possible. This will make it easier for your reader to
understand the tem you define.
2. Do not use the term (or forms of the term) as part of your definition. Do not write, Matery means
that one has mastered a skill. In place of mastered, you could use learned, for example.
3. Include enough distinguishing characteristics so that your readers will not mistake the term for
something similar within the class. In you deinf answering machine as a machine that records
messages, your definition would be incomplete because compters also record messages.
4. Do not limit the definition so much that it becomes inaccurate. Defining bacon as a smoked, salted
meat from a pig that is served at breakfast would be too limited because bacon is also served at
other meals.
The following suggestions will help you identify distinguishing characteristics and supporting details for the
specific term you intend to define in your essay:
1.

2.
3.
4.

5.
6.

Discuss the term with a fried or someone in your family, making notes as you talk. Pay attention to
what you bring up first, what makes the most sense to the person, and how you respond to any
confusion.
Brainstorm a list of words that describe your term, people and actions that might serve as
examples of the term, and everything a person would need to know to understand the term.
Observe a person who is associated with the term or who performs so aspect of it. Take notes on
our observations.
Look up the terms etymology, or origin, in the Oxford English Dictionary, A Dictionary of
American English, A Dictionary of Americanisms, all of which are available in the reference section
of a library. Take notes; the words etymology will give you some of its characteristic and
details and might give you ideas on how to organize your essay. (Do this one, for reals.)
Think of incidents or situations that reveal the meaning of the term.
Think of similar and different terms with which your reader is likely to be more familiar.

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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.

First Draft: Topic & Structure

DUE: 2/9 or 10

Developing your Thesis

Once you have gathered the distinguishing characteristics and supporting details, you can begin to form
your thesis. It might be helpful to include a brief standard definition within your thesis and an explanation
of why your extended definition of the term might be useful, interesting or important to readers. Consider
the difference between the next two statements:

Wireless cable is a means of transmitting television signals through the air by microwave.
The future of wireless cable, a method of transmitting television signals through the air by
microwaves, is uncertain.

Organizing and Drafting

Consider the following graphic organizer for an extended definition essay:

introduces term
provides background information
thesis statement: gives standard definition and
reveals the importance of the term

Introduction
Body Paragraphs
(more than 1)
Conclusion

distinguishing characteristics
supporting details

refers back to thesis

draws essay to a satisfying close

Use the following guidelines to draft your essay:

1. Include enough details. Be sure to include sufficient information to enable your reader to
understand each characteristic.
2. Consider including the history of the etymology of the term. You might include a brief history of
your term in the introduction or in some other part of your essay to capture your readers interest.
3. Use transitions! (still always) as you move from characteristic to characteristic, be sure to use a
transitional word or phrase to signal each change and guide your readers along. The transitions
another, also, and in addition are especially useful in extended definitions.
4. Write an effective introduction and satisfying conclusion. As noted earlier, your introduction should
introduce the term, provide any needed background information and state your thesis (which
includes a standard definition and your main point). Also, when introducing your term, it may be
helpful to use negation, explaining what the term is and what it is not. Alternatively, you might use
your introduction to justify the importance of your topic.
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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.

Revision:

Style imagery, figurative language, diction, & syntax

DUE 02/16-17

Take some time after youve written your first draft before you reread or revise it.
You have two options to work on your revision in class. The first is reading your work aloud and having a
conversations on your areas of success and growth; the second is to exchange papers and annotate each others work.
OPTION ONE:
Read your essay aloud, have your partner create an outline to see if all of your work flows successfully and makes
sense structurally.
When you read your essay aloud, substitute term x each time the term occurs, then ask your classmate to identify
the term you are defining. If you reader or listener cannot come up with the term or a synonym for it. You probably
need to make your distinguishing characteristics more specific or add details.
Have your partner help you find exceptions: try to identify exceptions to your distinguishing characteristics.
Suppose, for example you define sports star as people who exemplify sportsmanlike behavior. Since most people
can name current sports stars who indulge in unsportsmanlike behavior, this distinguishing characteristic needs to be
modified or deleted.
Have your partner find other terms that fit all of your characteristics: for example, in defining the term bulletproof
vest, you would explain that it is a piece of clothing worn by law-enforcement officers, among others, to protect them
from bullets and other life-threatening blows. Another kind of protective clothing a helmet would also fit your
description, however. You would need to add information about where on the body a bulletproof vest is worn.
OPTION TWO:
1.

2.

3.
4.
5.
6.

7.

Highlight the thesis statement

a. Does it include a brief definition of the term?
b. Does it indicate why your extended definition is useful, interesting, or important?
Number the parts of the extended definition in the margin.
a. Do these parts make your definition specific and focused?
i. Delete any details that do not help define your term.
Place checkmarks beside the distinguishing characteristics of your definition.
a. Do they make your term distinct from similar terms?
Draw a star next to the supporting details that explain the distinguishing characteristics of your definition.
a. How do you connect your details and help explain the distinguishing characteristics of your term?
Draw [brackets] around sections where you use negation or address misconceptions.
a. Does each section eliminate possible misunderstandings?
Underline the topic sentence of each paragraph.
a. Does each paragraph focus on a particular characteristic?
b. Is each paragraph well developed?
Draw a box around the introduction and conclusion.
a. Does the introduction provide necessary background information?
b. Does the conclusion bring the essay to a satisfying close?

Examine your syntax and consider these writing strategies to strengthen your sentence structure:

Begin your sentences in a variety of ways (No Two Sentences Start with the Same Word).
Vary the length of your sentences (not all long, complex or short, choppy sentences).
Feel free to use coordinating conjunctions to make compound sentences (but dont forget your
commas Ms. Lange hates that).
Make sure no sentences end in a preposition.
Avoid starting sentences with a coordinating conjunction.
Read your paper aloud to someone; it should have an easy flow and rhythm.

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Review your diction and consider these strategies to strengthen your word choice:

Eliminate weak verbs and adjectives

Avoid dead words or untouchables
Use consistent tense in your writing (present? past?)
Select accurate, strong, specific, powerful words that energize your writing
Use transitions consistently in the writing to show that you are moving from one detail to the next (Thats
right. Its going in the rough draft and revision phases.)

Final Draft: Usage, Punctuation, & Grammar check

DUE: 2/19-20

These are common mistakes made in comparison and contrast writing, check your writing for these possible errors:
Make sure you avoid the awkward expressions is when or is where in defining your term. Instead name the class
to which the term belongs.
o Early bird specials is when restaurants offer reduced price dinners late in the afternoon and early in the
evening.
Early bird specials are reduced-priced dinners served late in the afternoon and early in the
evening.
o A rollover is where an employee transfers money from one retirement account to another.
A rollover is a transaction in which an employee transfers money from one retirement account to
another.
Make sure subjects and verbs agree in number.
o When two subjects are joined by and, the verb should be plural.
Taken together, the military and medicare costs should be cost -- U.S. taxpayers an
enormous amount of money.
o When two subjects are joined by or the verb should agree with the noun closest to it.
For most birds, the markings or wing span are should be is easily observed with a pair of
good binoculars.
o When two subject and verb are separated by a prepositional phrase, the verb should agree with the
subject of the sentence, not with the noun in the phrase.
The features of hot-air balloon is should be are best learned by studying the attached diagram.
Dont forget about these old favorites:
Use a comma between coordinate adjectives that are not joined by and.
o Kaiden was a confident, skilled pianist.
You can tell if you need a comma because they can be switched and it still makes sense:
Kaiden was a skilled, confident pianist.
Do not use commas between cumulative adjectives.
o Two frightened brown eyes peered at us from under the sofa.
You wouldnt write frightened two brown eyes.
Use a hyphen to connect two words that work together as an adjective before a noun.
o Well-used book
o Perfect-fitting shoes
o Foil-wrapped pizza
Use a comma before a coordinating conjunction when joining two independent clauses.
o I love writing descriptive papers, but they seem out of place when they are not integrated into a
full essay.
Look at adjective and adverbs and their degrees of comparison positive, comparative, and superlative.
o Make sure you change the form of adjective and adverbs when you compare two items
(comparative) and when you compare three or more items (superlative).
Both The Others and Hannibal were suspenseful, but I liked The Others better (not best).
Make sure that items in a pair linked by correlative conjunction (either or, neither nor, not only but
also) are in the same grammatical form.
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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.

The Grand Canyon is not only a spectacular tourist attraction, but also scientists consider it a useful
geological record for scientists.

Writing Reflection
What do you consider your greatest strength in this paper?

What part of this paper would you revise again if you could?

What do you think youve improved the most in the writing of this paper?

What was the most difficult thing you wrestled with in writing this paper?

What would you like Ms. Lange to think about as shes reading your paper?

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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.

I Want an A Checklist
Diction

Topic
Prompt has been answered: Select an
important value or concept that lies at the
heart of an issue you care about deeply,
including an exploration of the terms various
applications and explanation of all that term
means to you.
Thesis includes standard definition with these
three things:
Term
Class
Characteristics
Thesis includes an explanation of why

the extended definition of the term might

be useful, interesting or important to
readers
uses negation, explaining what the term
is and what it is not
includes etymology of the term in an
interesting fashion

No weak verbs or adjectives are included

Included vocabulary that is striking and
varied
Consistent tense is used throughout writing
No dead words or untouchables
Transitions are used to make reading clear
and smooth (oh, look! Its in two sections)

Syntax
Complete sentences are used throughout the
writing
Sentences begin with a variety of ways
(NTSSWTSW)
Sentences vary in length
No sentences end with a preposition
No sentences start with a coordinating
conjunction

Usage, Grammar, and

Punctuation

Structure
Introduction introduces the term
Introduction provides any needed

background information
Introduction states your thesis
Strong opening sentence(s)
Thoughtful transitions clearly show how ideas
connect
Each paragraph encompasses a
distinguishing characteristic of the term
Supporting details are included in each body
paragraph
Sequencing that is logical and effective
Pacing is effective (writer knows when to
elaborate with details or to pick up the pace
and move on)
Paragraph structure matches the purpose of
writing and flows smoothly
Solid closing sentences that drives home the
dominant impression or theme
Conclusion brings essay to a satisfying close

Elimination all of the phrases is when and is

where.
Every subject and verbs agree in number
Use a comma between coordinate adjectives
that are not joined by and.
Do not use commas between cumulative
adjectives.
Use a hyphen to connect two words that
work together as an adjective before a noun.
Use a comma before a coordinating
conjunction when joining two independent
clauses.
Adjectives and adverbs should reflect their
degree of comparison
Make sure that items in a pair linked by
correlative conjunction (either or, neither
nor, not only but also) are in the same
grammatical form.
Use MLA heading

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McWhorter, Kathleen. Successful College Writing. 3rd ed. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martins, 2006.