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Shannons Gift: A Critical Analysis

Heather Lynch
CFS 4052 Family Policy & Law
Louisiana State University

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Shannons Gift: A Critical Analysis
The book Shannons Gift chronicles Nate Bennetts life after unexpectedly losing his
wife, Shannon. Shannon was affected by a mitochondrial disease that compromised her health in
a number of ways. After undergoing what was thought to be a routine shoulder surgery, Shannon
collapsed as what was believed to be a result of the mitochondrial disease, went into a coma,
spent eleven days in the ICU, and died a few hours after her family honored her advance
directive of withdrawing life support. In the two years following Shannons collapse and death,
Nate recorded his feelings, stresses, struggles, and successes on a blog that was read by a very
large number of people. The collection of blog entries was later brought together in the book,
Shannons Gift.
Purpose
The purpose of this paper is to produce a critical analysis of the book Shannons Gift from
a family policy perspective. I will use one family principle and one family function to discuss
their importance in family life by using examples taken from Shannons Gift.
Family Impact
This paper is being written through the family impact lens that examines the family
principles and family functions as they are defined by Karen Bogenschneider. The five family
principles are: family responsibility, family stability, family relationships, family diversity, and
family engagement. The five family functions are: family formation, partner relationships,
economic support, childrearing, and caregiving.
Function
The family function I have chosen to focus on is economic support. As previously stated,
economic support concerns how needs are being met within the family. A few examples of

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economic support would be income from a job, child support, alimony, welfare benefits, other
government assistance, health care benefits, life insurance benefits, and many other sources of
economic support for a family. For the Bennett family, there was no shortfall of economic
support, even after Shannon was no longer physically present within the family. This was
apparent in many instances throughout the book. However, it did give great insight as to why
economic support would be both vital and extremely helpful in not only the initial aftermath, but
throughout the grieving and support process as well. A few aspects of economic support that
were evident throughout the book and discussed with Nate Bennett himself were the fact that
people are underinsured, funeral costs and hospital bills tend to be very costly, and there is a lot
of lost productivity and loss of future economic support due to grieving.
Principle
The family impact principle I have chosen to focus on for the purpose of this paper is
Principle 2 Family Stability. As described by Bogenschneider, Whenever possible, policies
and programs should encourage and reinforce marital, parental, and family commitment and
stability, especially when children are involved. Intervention in family membership and living
arrangements is usually justified only to protect family members from serious harm or at the
request of the family itself. Family stability was impacted in several ways throughout
Shannons Gift.
Family Function Economic Support
As previously noted, economic support was not an issue in the Bennett family. Starting
with the beginning, when Shannon collapsed and was in the hospital, the Bennetts were able to
fly their son Reid back to Atlanta from Colorado to be with his mother. Last minute flights are
quite expensive, and flights in general cost at least a couple hundred dollars. Reid being able to

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be with his mother in her last days was of great importance, Im sure. This is an instance in
which economic support was useful. If Reid hadnt been able to see his mother and tell her
goodbye, it is likely that he would have had a much harder time than he already did grieving her
passing. It would have added another aspect of grief as well in a sense that he would have likely
felt that he didnt have much in the way of closure. It was also helpful that he was able to fly
back to Atlanta because he had the support of his family and life-long friends. If he had to stay in
Colorado because his family could not afford to fly him out, he wouldnt have had that tight knit
circle of people to help him during a time of need.
Upon Shannons death, services needed to be held to commemorate her life and allow her
family and friends to come together to remember her and share how she impacted their lives.
Most importantly, to tell her goodbye. As we have learned throughout our CFS coursework, and
as Nate told us as well, people are underinsured. It was clear that economic support was not an
issue in this aspect either, because it would have been a great struggle to hold the services
without any life insurance policy that would have been on hold due to the death certificate
nonsense. It was made evident that life insurance is extremely important in death because any
kind of funeral expenses cost several thousands of dollars. Many families do not have that kind
of money available to spend, which would add an extra stressor on top of losing a loved one. On
top of funeral costs, hospital bills and other debt can pile up on the surviving spouse as well. I
feel as though it would be helpful for life insurance to be bundled with health insurance the way
that dental insurance is. As we have discussed, life insurance doesnt have to be expensive. I feel
that most people that dont have life insurance arent aware of its real importance and therefore
dont seek to obtain it. If it were bundled with health insurance, had the benefits explained, and
made people aware that it is usually a small amount of money paid out every month, there would

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be more people with adequate life insurance to cover themselves and their families in a time of
loss. Worrying about money and how to take care of a loved ones final expenses should not be
added on to a grief that is already so substantial.
Another aspect of economic support that I hadnt thought of until Nate mentioned to us
was lost productivity due to grief. I can imagine it is extremely difficult to go back to work after
losing a loved one, especially a spouse or immediate family member. I am aware that some
companies have bereavement periods for people that have experienced a loss. However, from a
policy standpoint, we know that some companies are not enough. As mothers sometimes receive
maternity leave, I feel that we should have a paid bereavement leave as well. If people are forced
to go back to work immediately following the death of a loved one, it is possible that their
grieving process will be drawn out and more complicated that it will be already. If there is a need
for economic support, paid bereavement would also help in a sense that they are receiving
economic support and being allowed to grieve a loss on their own terms. This would allow
family members to prepare for funeral plans, take care of their loved ones belongings, seek
counseling, and also spend time with other family members and friends that can help them
grieve, instead of having to rush back to work so that they do not fall behind on bills. Nate
mentioned this in his blog when he told that Tech was so wonderful in giving him the time he
needed to grieve his loss of Shannon. I can say with confidence that the fact he was not made to
go back to work immediately had an effect on his life in a more positive way than if he had been
made to go back.
Principle 2 Family Stability
From a principle and function standpoint, it was evident to me that Family Stability and
Economic Support could be tied together in a number of ways using examples from the book. In

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the first sense that was previously mentioned was Reid being flown to Atlanta to be with his
mother and family in the time following her passing. One program I found that related to this
when economic support may be an issue is that several airlines offer bereavement rates. While
the range was a 5%-20% discount, there may be situations where that is still substantial enough
for a family member to be able to travel to where a loved one is.
Another instance involving flights was the fact that the Bennett family, Nate especially,
was able to travel freely around the country to be with the boys, visit Shannons tree, visit places
that he and Shannon liked, and take family vacations to create new family rituals. During those
times, the parental relationship was reinforced, the family commitment was reinforced, and
stability was provided to all three men. The family vacation over the holidays was a great
example of family stability that was afforded by means of economic support. Had there been no
option for the family to take the trip, rent the house, and spend time away from other obligations
to be there, they would have had to be at home. Without the economic support, they may have
not been able to be together at all as Reid would have had to stay in Colorado, Spencer would
have been wherever he was working at the time, and Nate would have been in their home.
Instead, while still remembering Shannon, they were able to create new family rituals to share,
which we have learned through CFS coursework, is important in situations like the one
experienced in Shannons Gift.
Another aspect of family stability was involved when Nate and his second wife, Linda,
were able to fly to New Orleans to visit Shannons tree. I am sure that the visit reinforced their
couple stability and later on their marital stability by Nate being able to share such an intimate
piece of his life with Linda as well as Linda being so open to receiving and understanding Nate
and Shannons relationship.

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References
Bogenschneider, K. (2006). Family Policy Matters (2nd ed.). Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.
Bennett, N. (2014). Shannons Gift. BookLogix.