Individual Proposal

Submitted by Chelsea Thomas

Salt Lake Community College
Communications 1010
April 9, 2015

Overview: As the book says, conflict is a part of life, but I happen to be really bad at it. In this
proposal I will be focusing on the conflict style I revert to (avoidance) and how it has impacted
my life for the worse. I will discuss my long term plans to try out different conflict styles and
practice handling conflicts constructively. It is my belief that with practice and criticism from my
peers and superiors, I will be able to improve my conflict avoidance over time.
Description of Problem: I have always been extremely bad at handling conflict. My idea of
handling involves no conflict at all because I dont say or do anything when the conflict arises.
I avoid problems like the plague. When I was a child and my mother would punish me for bad
things I had done I wouldnt explain myself, I would just nod my head and cry. Now as an adult
my avoidance has progressed further along in to my life. At work I dont argue when my boss
says Im not performing to her standard and in my personal relationship I dont say anything
when my boyfriend wants to discuss an issue between us. But I have noticed that instead of
avoiding the problem all the together, Ive started accommodating, which I dont think is
necessarily a bad thing. The Communications book says accommodating can start to be a
problem. It can be equivalent to appeasement, sacrificing your principles, and putting harmony
above dealing with important issues. (Aldher and Elmhorst, p.127)
Resources and Constraints: My life is busy but I wouldnt say there too many constraints that
stop me from practicing my communication styles. I have school and work, but sometimes my
job forces me to acknowledge conflicts. Im a server at a restaurant and sometimes guests have
issues that I just cant ignore. So since my job is centered on communication and service, I think
it could be considered both a resource and a constraint. The class text is also a nice guide, but I
wont be keeping it for much longer. Who I really look to as a resource is my boyfriend. Of
course he isnt the most ideal role model for communicating but he has helped me improve
myself in the past and he would be benefitting from the change in conflict style; wed actually be
able to talk about our problems.
Recommendations: I propose to improve my conflict communication style by practicing the
other styles stated in the book from pages 127-129. I think I would benefit understanding what it
was like to handle conflict from another point of view. When the time comes that I do get in to a
conflict with my boss or my boyfriend, I will make the conscious effort to not avoid sharing my
point of view or my feelings, I wont accommodate unless it is clear that I am in the wrong. I will
also ask for criticism. It is my belief that being able to accept criticism will help me to determine
with style of communication will be suited for me besides always being passive. After using a
different style of conflict communication, I will ask whoever I was speaking with (assuming it
was my boss or boyfriend) and ask them how I came across. Really this could count as criticism
like from page 118 in the book or it could potentially be the basics of the communication model.
Its possible that I could be encoding in a difficult manner for other people to understand.
However, I cant improve my communication style without the help of a second party. I could
talk all I want to myself, but thats not going to give me feedback.
Summary: If everything goes according to plan, I will be practicing different conflict styles
whenever the opportunity arises. I will ask for criticism from whomever I am talking to if it
prudent to do so. It is very important for me to be able to communicate better without always
being passive. Im looking forward to the results that will generally effect my everyday
communication at work and at home.

Works Cited
Adler, R&J. Elmhorst. (2010). Communicating at Work (10e). Boston: McGraw Hill.