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Dustin Crossan
Professor Lisa Nordquist
English Comp. 1
3, November 2014

Living with Divorced Parents

Throughout my life I have experienced many emotional situations. Just like anyone else,
these experiences have caused many good and bad emotions. Certain experiences will effect in
different ways. One experience throughout my life that has caused countless emotions was when
my parents got a divorce; Nowadays 45-50% of marriages end in divorce (Divorce Statistics).
Even religious families have an unexpected divorce rate. Baptists have a 29 percentage rate, and
Catholics are at 21% (Robinson, B.A.). This experience caused me to feel angry, sad, and
thankful.
One emotion that I felt quite often during my parents divorce was anger. The first reason
that I was angry was because I had to transfer schools. Growing up with the same small group of
friends my entire life made it that much harder for me to leave and think about making new
friends. I was also angry because the school that I was leaving had an excellent basketball
program, and the school that I was moving to did not. I was not looking forward to meeting and
learning how to play with a new team, and losing the brotherly bond I had with my previous
team. The second reason, I was angry at the fact that I was not going to be able to see my father
every day. My father and I are extremely close, and I could not do the same activities with my
mother that I enjoyed doing with my father. My father is the only person in my family that
understands me; he understands me because we have the same personalities. I was upset when

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staying with my mother because my father was the only person that made me feel safe at night.
The third reason, I was angry because being so young and always listening to my parents argue
was heartbreaking. Marriage counseling, unfortunately, the public has all too little information
about (Duvall, Sylvanus Milne). I wish my parents would have known about the positive effects
marriage counseling could have on their marriage. My parents often argued over custody; this
was difficult for me because my mother would always win, so my brother and I would have to go
stay with her. The fact that my parents could not be around each other for a certain amount of
time without arguing made it that much more difficult for me.
The next emotion that this experience caused me to feel was sadness. Children
understand the difference between happiness and sadness, so when they see their family member
smiling and they see their own family frowning with tears in their eyes, they see this and react
the same way, which is normally becoming unhappy (Arreola, Joseph). First, I was sad because
I had to choose whether I wanted to live with my mother or father. I knew that I wanted to live
with my father, but I did not want to hurt my mothers feelings. My brother wanted to live with
my mom, but I did not want to grow up without him. Although we wanted different things, I did
not want him to make a choice that he did not want. I was also sad because I had to spend my
time wisely with each of my parents, instead of getting to spend as much time as I wanted with
both of them. For example, I would only get to see my father on Christmas Day for about three
hours, and then I would spend the rest of the day with my mother. Although it was nice getting to
have two Christmass, I would have rather spent it with both parents together. Another example,
during Thanksgiving I would spend most of the time with my father and barely have time to see
my mother and her family. The last reason, I was sad because I had to leave my family. I had a

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lot of family in the town that I lived in and could rely on them for anything. Some of my best
friends were my cousins; my family is extremely close.
The final emotion that I felt during my parents divorce was, thankfulness. The divorce of
my parents brought my brother and me closer together. We were the only people there for each
other, and knew exactly what the other was going through. Even though moving schools was
difficult, having my brother by my side made it easier. He was the one person that was always
there when I needed someone to talk to. I was also thankful that my father got remarried and was
finally happy again. I got really lucky with my stepmom; she treats my brother and me as her
own sons. Not only her, but her entire family was very welcoming to us joining their family.
Since they have been married, I now have and younger brother and a younger sister that I love.
She has supported my brother and me since the first day she met us. My mother recently go
remarried too; now she is also happy. I am not as close to my stepdad as I am to my stepmom,
but I am thankful because he makes my mother happy. I am not around my stepdad and mother
as much as I am around my father and stepmom, but I enjoy visiting them because my stepdad
and I enjoy the same hobbies.
Throughout my parents divorce, I experienced some bad emotions, but also some good
ones. During this experience I learned that everything happens for a reason. It was a very
difficult time in my life, but overall, I am happier now because of how everything turned out.

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Reference
Arreola, Joseph, Yvette Hartounian, Ashley Kurges, Paula Maultasch, and Lauren Retana.
"Introduction To Divorce and Children:." Divorce on Children. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Oct.
2014.
"Divorce Statistics." Information on Divorce Rate Statistics. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Oct. 2014.
Duvall, Sylvanus Milne, 1900-. Before You Marry. New rev. ed. New York: Association Press,
1959.
Robinson, B.A. "U.S. Divorce Rates: For Various Faith Groups, Age Groups and Geographical
Areas." U.S. Divorce Rates: For Various Faith Groups, Age Groups and Geographical
Areas. N.p., 20 July 2009. Web. 27 Oct. 2014.