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Editorial on waterboarding

by Sarah Davila

FILE

ENGLISH_301_PERSUASIVE_ESSAY.DOCX (524.88K)

T IME SUBMIT T ED

17-NOV-2015 03:57PM

WORD COUNT

1781

SUBMISSION ID

602015889

CHARACT ER COUNT

9545

purportedly?

solid thesis

block indent

can
you
take
this
further,
Sarah?
Once
we
"lower"
ourselv
es,
what
happen
s to our
other
laws,
legal
positio
ns,
reputati
ons,
etc.?

who is he?

there it is--I knew your brain would take you here eventually! :)

Some people say? I thought you


were saying otherwise?

don't need two diagrams of same thing. Refer to diagrams in text.

good, use this earlier in the P

being?

You can probably now add the recent insufficient communication


between France and Belgium to this argument?

this is an excellent start! Try adding more authoritative


explanations and arguments about the constitution, geneva
convention, what we know about cases that were and were
not thwarted, etc. to get an even higher score.

Editorial on waterboarding
GRADEMARK REPORT
FINAL GRADE

GENERAL COMMENTS

92

Instructor

/100

PAGE 1

Text Comment.

purportedly?

Text Comment.

solid thesis

PAGE 2

Text Comment.

can you take this f urther, Sarah? Once we "lower" ourselves, what
happens to our other laws, legal positions, reputations, etc.?

Text Comment.

block indent

Text Comment.

who is he?

Text Comment.

there it is--I knew your brain would take you here eventually! :)

Text Comment.

Some people say? I thought you were saying otherwise?

Text Comment.

don't need two diagrams of same thing. Ref er to diagrams in text.

Text Comment.

good, use this earlier in the P

PAGE 3

PAGE 4

Text Comment.

being?

PAGE 5

Text Comment.

You can probably now add the recent insuf f icient communication between
France and Belgium to this argument?
QM

Audience's needs
Always consider the education and experience of your readers when you write. If you are writing
to general audience, you will need to def ine scientif ic words or terms and concepts that are
specif ic to your f ield. Likewise, you will need to explain any background to which you ref er. On
the other hand, a specialized audience may f ind such def initions and explanations unnecessary.

PAGE 6

Text Comment.

this is an excellent start! T ry adding more authoritative explanations and


arguments about the constitution, geneva convention, what we know about cases that were
and were not thwarted, etc. to get an even higher score.
PAGE 7

RUBRIC: EDITORIAL RUBRIC

RHET ORIC (10%)

90 / 95

95 / 95

Write f or a specif ic audience and purpose.


ABSENT OR BELOW Audience's needs are of ten not recognized: terms and ideas need explanation and
BASIC
language needs adjustment f or the audience. Purpose (to argue a position
(65)
persuasively) isn't clear or achieved.
DEVELOPING
(75)

Shows some attention to audience's needs, sometimes def ining necessary terms and
ideas and using audience-appropriate language. Purpose (to argue a position
persuasively) may be unclear at times, and it may not be achieved convincingly.

PROFICIENT
(85)

Usually shows attention to audience's needs, def ining necessary terms and ideas
and using audience-appropriate language. Purpose may be implied, but it's clear and
achieved.

ADVANCED
(95)

Shows sophisticated attention to audience's needs, def ining necessary terms and
ideas and using audience-appropriate language. Purpose (to argue a position
persuasively) is clear and achieved with style.

ET HICAL RES (10%)

95 / 95

Find, evaluate, select, synthesize, organize, ethically cite, and present inf ormation f rom a variety of
sources appropriate to their disciplines.
ABSENT OR BELOW Omits or uses discipline-appropriate in-text and end-of -text citations and quotation
BASIC
marks incorrectly. Drops quotations and ideas into text without introducing source.
(65)
Frequently uses irrelevant or unpersuasive sources or relies exclusively on one

source.
DEVELOPING
(75)

A f ew errors in discipline-appropriate in-text and end-of -text citations and quotation


marks. Of ten includes sources without introduction in cases when introduction is
necessary and discipline appropriate. Sometimes relies too heavily on a single source
or uses irrelevant sources.

PROFICIENT
(85)

Correctly uses discipline-appropriate in-text and end-of -text citations and quotation
marks. Usually introduces each source f ully (as necessary and discipline-appropriate)
reader knows who did the research or communicating, f or whom, and why. Use of
sources is usually diverse and relevant.

ADVANCED
(95)

Correctly uses discipline-appropriate in-text and end-of -text citations and quotation
marks. Introduces each source f ully (as necessary and discipline-appropriate)
reader knows who did the research or communicating, f or whom, and why. Use of
sources is always diverse and relevant.

PERSUASION (30%)

85 / 95

Compare, evaluate, synthesize, and communicate caref ully, objectively, and persuasively the relative merits
of alternative or opposing arguments, assumptions, and cultural values. Integrate this evaluative work into
a persuasive argument.

ABSENT OR BELOW Fails to support claims with relevant reasoning and/or specif ic evidence. Objectivity,
BASIC
balance, and a controlling idea may be lacking.
(65)
DEVELOPING
(75)

Attempts to support claims with reasoning and evidence, but specif icity and/or
objectivity may be lacking. A controlling idea may be missing or implied. Objectivity and
balance may be weak or f lawed.

PROFICIENT
(85)

Usually supports the controlling idea and paragraph claims with relevant, thorough,
and insightf ul reasoning and specif ic evidence. Usually maintains objectivity and
balance in argumentation.

ADVANCED
(95)

Supports the controlling idea and paragraph claims with relevant, thorough, and
insightf ul reasoning and specif ic evidence. Maintains objectivity and balance in
argumentation.

ORGANIZ AT ION (30%)

95 / 95

Organize, f ocus, and communicate ones thoughts clearly and ef f ectively to address a rhetorical situation.
ABSENT OR BELOW Organizational devices (controlling idea, headings, subheadings, topic sentences,
BASIC
transitions) may be absent, unrelated to the prompt, or illogically connected. Ps
(65)
contain multiple topics or are disorganized.
DEVELOPING
(75)

Organizational devices (controlling idea, headings, subheadings, topic sentences,


transitions) f it the prompt, but may be vague, too broad, or inconsistenly or illogically
linked. Ps may not be unif ied.

PROFICIENT
(85)

Clear organizational devices (controlling idea, headings, subheadings, topic


sentences, transitions) f it the prompt and tie ideas and topics together adequately.
Ps are usually unif ied.

ADVANCED
(95)

Clear, specif ic organizational devices (thesis, topic sentences, headings, transitions)


f it the prompt and tie ideas and topics together logically and seamlessly. Paragraphs
are unif ied.

LANG & DESIGN (20%)

85 / 95

Recognize, evaluate, and employ the f eatures and contexts of language and design that express and
inf luence meaning and that demonstrate sensitivity to gender and cultural dif f erences.
ABSENT OR BELOW Spelling, syntax, diction, or punctuation errors impede readability. Lanuage may ref lect
BASIC
a gender or cultural bias. Design may be unconventional and inef f ective.
(65)
DEVELOPING
(75)

Spelling, syntax, diction, or punctuation errors of ten impede readability or otherwise


distract f rom meaning. Lanuage may occasionally suggest a gender or cultural bias.
Design may be inconventional or inef f ective.

PROFICIENT
(85)

Spelling, syntax, diction, or punctuation errors are f ew and do not distract f rom
meaning. Lanuage respects gender and cultural dif f erences. Design is conventional
and ef f ective.

ADVANCED
(95)

Outstanding control of language, including ef f ective diction and sentence variety.


Lanuage respects gender and cultural dif f erences. Design is conventional and
ef f ective.