Lopez 1!

Cindy Lopez
Jennifer Rodrick
English 114B
March 16, 2016
Project Space (1st Draft)
In our society where conformity is important, all individuals way of being is shaped
according to others and what they have to say. The idea of fitting in is put into everyones head,
where at one point in life they are forced to deal with this situation of fitting in with the people
they are surrounded by. This situation is ordinary in our society and can happen multiple times,
even as one is older we may often find ourselves conforming to others lifestyle. Being different
is not necessarily ideal, people have the impression that one must follow the social norms and
not ever challenge them. One must be a certain way and look a certain way to please others
rather than ourselves. The reassurance and acceptance of other people is important to many so
that they determine who they are and alter their identities. Although some may not realize,
society and social surroundings certainly shapes a persons self-identity significantly.
Social surroundings are a vital part in the shaping of identities, the environment and who
we are surrounded by has a huge relevance to the results of who we are as person. Also, during
our youth especially is when we are integrated by society and their ideas of how one should be
and not be. The social norms that are set for us, are seen as a must to live up to. Following what
others define as wrong and right has essentially became a custom. No one really hesitates to
question why one must be a certain way and opts to just follow along. What other people have to

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say about one is taken seriously. If people think one is wrong for being different then one would
want to change to accommodate others and meet their standards to be considered normal.
With teens this issue can certainly be spotted, at this stage in their life I would say that
just about everyone is all ears on how they should look and be, to be cool and accepted. If one
was any different they will stand out and be seen as odd. In What Is a Homosexual? by Andrew
Sullivan, we see this situation where he as a homosexual defers his real identity because of what
other people would think of him. Sullivan does not want to step out of the norm everyone lives in
so instead he controls who he is to operate in that environment. The story of him living as a gay
adolescent in high school shows just how much affect society and his social surroundings had on
him. Sullivan states how The heterosexual learns to make distinctions between his sexual desire
and his emotional longingsnot because he is particularly prone to objectification of the flesh,
but because he needs to survive as a social and sexual being. The society separates these two
entities, and for a long time the homosexual has no option but to keep them separate (1). He
shows just how he learns and follows certain standards set by society that are not fit to who he is.
His sexuality was not all figured out, he might have not known what he was but was certainly
aware of what he was not able to do that is rightful in the eyes of society.
Doing the normal things any normal teen as in a heterosexual teen, was something
Sullivan was not capable of. Instead, he found ways to get away of those situations and deferred
his identity by hiding it and getting more involved in his school work. This method of opting to
hide ones real identity is a commonality and a way of coping for some. Being able to fit in is all
that matters. There is a fear of rejection, the existence of such ideas being public for everyone to
know of and follow creates an understanding of what is right and wrong in society.

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Works Cited
Sullivan, Andrew. What Is A Homosexual? The Norton Reader. Shorter 13th ed. New York:
W.W. Norton & Company, Inc, 2012. Print.