OPTION G: NON-MARITAL SEX

Dear friend,
In this time of desperate contemplating to whether you should or should not have
intercourse with your boyfriend I would advise you to think it through clearly. I know you heard
of the saying try on the shoes before you buy them, but hopefully you know this is much more
serious than just a silly old saying. Please understand that this is a major decision that can
produce life long consequences. I have come up with some reasons that will hopefully show
you more risks correlated with having non-marital sex than the rewards.
The first reason, I hope you would pay close attention to is the possibility of contracting
Sexually Transmitted Infections, HIV, and AIDS. These are contracted when you have sexual
contact, whether its sexual intercourse, oral sex, or anal sex. I hope you know how often these
infections occur. According to the Centers for Disease Control, there were 1.3 million reported
cases of chlamydia, a 24 percent increase since 2006 and four times the number of gonorrhea
caseschlamydia is around 2.8 million infections, with more than half going undiagnosed
(Strong, Cohen 220). Such infections can have life changing affects like HIV and AIDS which
weaken your immune system and increases your chances of getting cancer. Is this something you
want to risk?
Another factor you should worry about is the risk of getting pregnant. You may say that
you will be careful or safe, but just realize accidents happen and those can have a huge impact on
your life. I know you dont want to bring a child into the picture on a rocky relationship, so
please think how serious this is.

I would also like to bring up the topic of emotion. Being sexually active with someone
creates this emotional tie between you and that person. This emotion can create a lot of conflict
like jealousy, which can destroy a relationship. There is also that possibility that you might meet
someone else, and it can be harder to leave that relationship because you feel as if you made a
certain kind of commitment.
There is one idea I would like you to keep in mind, women are more likely to be worried
about negative outcomes of their first experience of intercoursewomen are more worried about
pregnancy, more likely to be nervous, more likely to be in pain more likely to experience
postictal guild and express with regret the wish that they had waited (Strong, Cohen 196). My
point is media tries to make sex seem that its everything youve ever wanted, but it isnt in the
end. Media puts a mask on all the risks which include ruining a relationship, contracting an STD,
feeling regret, forcing commitment, becoming pregnant, and destroying a marriage in the long
run. So please think about the seriousness and the consequences associated with this decision. It
may seem small at first but it can change your future in a negative way.

However, if I were to address a male instead of a female, my advice would be

considerably different in the sense that I would have to persuade them even more. Some of the
research conducted by Laura Carpenter shows that women value their virginity more than men
do. According to The Marriage and Family Experience men (in the 1980s) welcomed
opportunities for casual sex and expressed distain for virginity (Strong, Cohen 196). Times have
changes sense that time period, but I still feel as if men have an emotional disconnect after
having sex. In other words they probably wont regret it or worry about the idea of pregnancy.

Work Cited
Strong, Bryan, and Theodore F. Cohen. The Marriage and Family Experience. Twelfth ed. N.p.:
Wadsworth, Cengage Learning, 2014. Print.