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Kayla Greene
Professor Campbell
UWRT 1103
May 3, 2016
Absent Father Homes: The Cry of the Children
Flashback with me to ten years ago when I was a little girl with braided hair, dressed in
my Sunday best, feeling like a royal princess, because I had the honor of riding shotgun in my
daddys pickup truck. Or four years ago, when I was a young teenage girl falling in love and
going on that first date, and my dad was there to drill the fear of God into that young boy. Fast
forward to the present day and my father is still equipping me with his love and wisdom as I
mold into a young adult woman. My dad has served as a rock in my life, and as someone who
pushes me further than I can imagine myself going, someone who I find security and stability in,
someone who I can always count on, and someone who loves and accepts me unconditionally.
Now, I urge you to think of the millions of children throughout the United States who
have been raised in the absence of their biological father. According to Ryan Sanders, in The
father absence crisis in America, 24 million children live in a home without their biological
father present. These are the same children who have never had that stability, children who have
never been made to feel confident when their father tells them how proud he is of them, or
children who have never received that proper discipline or driving motivation. These 24 million
children did not ask, choose, or even deserve for their fathers to abandon them, but yet that is the
situation they are faced with. There is no denying this issue as a crisis that is sweeping across our
nation, and becoming more and more prevalent among society, and there is no denying that this

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is a destructive crisis. The basis and concern of my research is how damaging is it on a childs
mental, social, and behavioral development when they are raised in a home where the father is
not present, or at least consistently present?
Although I have not been directly affected by this issue, I have seen the victimization
through the life of my cousin, and I have seen firsthand the bitterness, the profound lack of
discipline and respect, the selfishness, and the many more destructive consequences that have
played out in his life as a result of having never met his biological father. He has never had that
stability, encouragement, or discipline that I have had my entire life, and sadly there are distinct
differences that you cannot deny or ignore. When you study the criminal behavior rates, drug and
alcohol use, homelessness population, teen pregnancy statistics, high school drop outs, and so
forth it is very interesting to also study and see the correlation with how many of these people
who make up those statistics were raised in homes where the father was absent. As Marcia
Carlson, a representative of Columbia University, stated in Family structure, father involvement,
and adolescent behavioral outcomes, compared to children living with two married biological
parents, children living apart from their fathers are, on average, more likely to be suspended or
expelled from school, more likely to engage in delinquent activities, more likely to experience
depression and anxiety, and more likely to report externalizing and internalizing behavioral
problems. In The father absence crisis in America, Ryan Sanders provides heartbreaking
statistics that backs up Marcia Carlsons claim. From research, it has been proven that a child
who grows up in a home where the father is absent, is four times more likely to grow up in
poverty, two times greater risk of infant death, seven times more likely to become pregnant as a
teenager, two times more likely to suffer obesity, two times more likely to become a high school
drop-out, more likely to commit crimes and go to prison, more likely to face abuse and neglect

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from a single parent and their boyfriends/girlfriends, and more likely to abuse substances such as
alcohol and drugs (Sanders).
In contrast to that, Paul Edwards, representative of the Deseret News, says research
shows that adolescents with involved fathers are far less likely to experiment with drugs and that
there are really positive correlations between the presence of a dad in a child's life and qualities
like empathy, impulse control, ability to respond effectively to ambiguous situations. This
translates into academic success, positive health outcomes, even physical safety. This begs the
question, why is this so? Why is this specific population of children, who I view as victims, more
susceptible to substance abuse, homelessness, teen pregnancy, mental illnesses, expulsion or
suspension from school, and delinquent behaviors? What is it specifically about the father role
that carries such negative and destructive consequences if it is absent from a childs life? That is
exactly what I have set out to find the answer to, but with an issue as complex as this it is
proving difficult to find that clear, consistent explanation.
With the discussion of father absent homes, you have to look at many different factors,
and see how those individual, different factors affect these social, mental, and behavioral
developments in different ways. Some of these factors include, but are not limited to, the timing
of the occurrence of the father being absent, socio-economic background of the father and the
family, or time and resources available to the remaining single parent.
It is important to note when the father absence occurs, because maybe the child was too
young to remember, or old enough to understand, therefore creating feelings of bitterness
towards the father. Perhaps the child had already been raised in the home with both biological
parents present, and the child had already grown up and moved out before the father removed
himself from the family, such as in the case of divorce, so that it had no significant impact or

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change on the individuals social, mental, and behavioral development. The mental capacities of
a ten year old versus a 25 year old differ greatly, so whereas the 25 year old can better
understand why the father leaves and better cope with the emotions, a ten year old would not be
able to do so effectively.
One must also factor in the socio-economic background of the father, and the time and
resources that are limited in single parent homes. Marcia Carlson discussed in her article that
when you have a home where both parents are present, you have double the time and double the
income, which creates that stability and support necessary for a childs developmental growth,
but when one parent (typically the father) leaves, that time and income greatly diminishes, and
sadly the greatest impact and consequences of that happening is seen mostly in the children. It
suddenly becomes difficult to efficiently and appropriately divide the time between the single
mom and the absent father, and in some cases the father may not want anything to do with his
children once he leaves.
The umbrella, so to speak, extends even further, because you also have to consider the
circumstance surrounding the father absence, meaning why is the father absent, and how that
affects each child differently, because each child that is victim to this has a unique situation.
Perhaps the child has been raised in a home where the biological father is not present, because
maybe he passed away, or maybe because he willingly left. These are all things that one must
take into consideration when understanding and observing these developmental affects,
otherwise you arent truly seeing the root of the problem, therefore solutions cannot be made.
The goal to my research is to grasp the root of the problem, and develop solutions.
The father-child relationship is a relatively unexplored and minimally talked about issue.
More often than not, a lot of the parenting pressure is placed on the mother, because it is the

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mother who carries the child for nine months and gives birth. It is the mother who is seen as the
nurture and nature provider for the child, and it is the mother who is responsible for biologically
and psychologically bonding with that child. Because of this, the father is not seemingly given as
significant as a role. However, the father has just as much as significant of a role within the
family structure as the mother does.
Throughout time and history, it was the father, or the husband, who was held in that
leadership position within the family. He was someone who provided shelter, food, and financial
support, which created this secure, safe atmosphere for the children to be raised in. As
technology advances, as morals are tested, and as culture is constantly changing so do the values
and emphasis placed on the father role within the family. With new technological advances, more
and more women are turning to alternative forms to get pregnant, such as artificial insemination,
adoption, or surrogate mothers. In the scenario of artificial insemination, the biological father,
the one who donates the sperm, typically remains anonymous, so then the mother is left as a
single-parent with limited resources and time. As culture changes, so do the morals and values
that were once placed on a very high pedestal. For instance, marriage was once seen as
something that needed to be established before having children. If someone got pregnant out of
wedlock, society and the community would shun them. Nowadays it is so common for women to
get pregnant outside of wedlock that nobody bats an eye when it happens. Less and less women
are choosing to get married, but are still wanting to have children, so this epidemic, and this new
generation of children who are growing up in the absence of a father figure is sweeping across
the nation at an alarming rate with devastating consequences to the childs wellbeing and society
as a whole.

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With this increase of women opting out of marriage, but still wanting to have children,
has come extensive research dealing with the fact that mothering and fathering parenting styles
are not actually that different from each other, thus one role doesnt really impact the childs
development more than the other role. Jay Fagan, along with several other authors of, Should
researchers conceptualize differently the dimensions of parenting for fathers and mothers,
advocate in their article for gender-neutral dimensions of parenting. Meaning, the authors are
emphasizing the importance of breaking down our conceptualizations of parenting and how we
view fathering and mothering roles as different, but rather seeing a more general model and
how the two roles can actually integrate together and share similarities, thus having similar longterm effects on a childs developmental stages. One of the key arguments in Fagans article is
that the role of the mother and father are converging, or becoming more similar, in the behaviors
in which they engage with their children, and the amount of time they are spending with their
children. Fagan recognizes that fathers and mothers behave differently, thus the way they engage
emotionally with their children are different as well, but he continues to highlight the idea that
the construct, or concept, of parenting roles are largely similar in the way it affects a childs
development.
While I recognize everything Fagan is advocating and arguing for, I must point out the
statistics presented earlier in this paper. It is important and respectful to consider all points of
view when addressing any type of issue, but you cant ignore the extensive research and data that
highlights the negative consequences of children growing up in absent-father homes. If
mothering roles dont affect a childs mental, behavioral, and social development any more than
a fathers role would, then how is it that children who are victim to absent-father homes are
more vulnerable to criminal behavior, substance abuse, homelessness, teen pregnancy, abuse, and

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emotional disorders? The correlation between these two factors are too notable to try and argue
against. There are distinct differences in men and women, especially on an emotional level, and
this can be proven in how we are biologically wired. Women typically express their emotions
more visibly than men do, so if a child is getting too much emotion from their mother, but not
enough, or no, tough-love or discipline from the father, then you can see where some of these
negative consequences would come into play. Its extremely important for a child to be raised in
an environment where both biological parents are consistently present, so that they are getting
this emotional and behavioral balance.
As I had mentioned earlier, my cousin has grown up his entire life without ever having
met his biological father, so I wanted to gain a perspective from his mother on how she feels this
has affected his emotional, behavioral, and social well-being. One of the biggest things his
mother has struggled with in raising him, has been the behavioral aspect. From my own personal
observation, Ive seen the lack of structural discipline in his life, and how his mother has always
given into his every want and desire. Because hes never been told no, it has created this
selfish personality, and has given him the mentality that he doesnt have to work for anything,
because it will just be handed to him. After talking with his mom, I kind of gained an
understanding of why this is the case. Her reasoning in not disciplining him, as she knows she
should be, is because she doesnt want to hurt his feelings or create animosity within their
relationship. She feels bad that his father chose to walk out of his life, so she often gives into his
wants or selfish behaviors, because she doesnt want to further damage his feelings. Sadly, this is
the case with far too many other single-moms, and this is what leads to those destructive
consequences. The mother feels as if she always has to be loving and a friend to her child, in
order to spare that child anymore heartache. While I absolutely think a mother should be loving

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and a friend towards her child, she should be a mother first, who implements punishments and
disciplinary actions when appropriate in teaching that child valuable lessons. The mother, in
essence, has two roles to fill, and these rolls are considerably different, so it can become quite
overwhelming to adequately fulfill both in the way that they should be, and in a way that will
promote the childs developmental growth.
When studying as complex a topic as absent-father homes and how that affects a childs
long-term social, mental, and behavioral development, it quickly becomes challenging and
murky. The goal of this paper was to attempt to offer some clarity, and just to shed some light on
a crisis that is emerging across our nation. Children are going through such a fragile, and critical
developmental time, so they need as much positive stimulation as possible to promote their
success, and this has to start in the homes with both biological parents present. These 24 million
children are crying out for help; its time we heard their voices.

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Works Cited
Carlson, Marcia J. "Family structure, father involvement, and adolescent behavioral outcomes."
Journal of Marriage and Family. 68.1 (2006): 137-154. Web. 15 March 2016.
Edwards, Paul. Interview by Michel Martin. The father factor in kids lives. Around the
Nation. Natl. Public Radio, 4 March 2014. Web. 14 March 2016.
Fagan, Jay, Randal Day, Michael E. Lamb, and Natasha J. Cabrera. "Should researchers
conceptualize differently the dimensions of parenting for fathers and mothers?" Journal
of Family Theory & Review. 6.4 (2014): 390-405. Web. 13 March 2016.
McLanahan, Sara, Laura Tach, and Daniel Schneider. The causal effects of father absence.
Annual Review of Sociology 399 (2013): 399427. PMC. Web. 15 March 2016.
Sanders, Ryan. The father absence crisis in America. The father factor. National fatherhood
initiative. 12 November 2013. Web. 20 April 2016.

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