1Waterworth

JordanWaterworth
Mrs.Housepian
English2HPeriod5
January2015
PeopleNeedTodoTheirPart
InthearticlesCanthelawMakeUsBeDecent?andAndofClayWeAreCreatedthe
authorsIsabelleandSterlingSilverarguespeoplesethicalresponsibilitytohelpingothersin
crisisandwhetherbystandersshouldbepunished.Ifpeopleunethicalactsgounpunishedthe
turnstocruelselfishplace.
Helpingapersonintroubleisonesethicalresponsibilityandrevealsdecencyinhumanity.
WhenCarldideverythinghecouldtotriedtosaveLily,RolfCarleremovedthelifebuoy,
closedhereyelids,heldhertohischestforafewmoments,thenlethergo(Isabelle335337).
AfterCarlrealizedhehadtakenethicalresponsibilitytohelpLilyhefinallycouldlethergo.If
peoplearelikeRolfandrealizetheythehaveresponsibilitytoactionandhelpotherpeoplein
needkindnesswouldberecognizedinhumanity.Inadditiontotheargumentpeoplehelping
others,theladythatwantedtoherneighborstohelphertwoboys,Itcouldsimplyrequire
warningsomeoneofimmediatedangerorcalling911(SterlingSilver2).Bystanderswhodont
wanttogetinvolvedcanstillbycausingattentiontothedisaster.Asaresultofpeopledoingthis
willeliminatepunishingbystandersfornotdoingtheirpart.Peopleneedtohelpothersinany
waytheycanorelsetheyshouldbepunished.

Rubricratingsubmittedon:1/29/2016,10:45:40AMbyc.smart@ggusd.net

Overall
Descriptionof
whateach

A5essay
demonstrates
aclear

A4essay
demonstrates
proficient

A3essay
demonstrates
developing

A2essayis
seriously
flawed.

A1essay
demonstrates
fundamental

2Waterworth

scorelooks
likethisrowis
for
informational
purposesonly.
SeeYOUR
scorebelow.
Yourscore:

competencein
writing.Itmay
havesome
errors,butthey
arenotserious
enoughto
distractor
confusethe
reader.(A6
essayis
superiorwriting
whichmeets
thecriteriaofa
Scoreof5,and
isespecially
distinctiveinits
exceptionally
coherentand
welldeveloped
argument,
thorough
developmentof
analysisof
specifics
relatedtothe
promptand
text(s),and
impressive
controlof
language.)

writing.Itmay
havesome
errorsthat
distractthe
reader,but
theydonot
significantly
obscure
meaning.

competence,
butisflawedin
some
significant
way(s).

deficienciesin
writingskills.

Statementof
Purpose/Focus
(ab)
Yourscore:1

(a)Claimis
clear,focused,
and
maintained.[if
applicable:(b)
Alternateor
opposing
claim(s)are
adequately
addressed.]

(a)Claimis
clear,andfor
themostpart
maintained,
thoughsome
loosely
relevant
materialmay
bepresent.[if
applicable:
(b)Alternateor
opposing
claim(s)are
introduced.]

(a)Claimmay
beclearly
focused,butis
flawedinsome
significant
way(s).[if
applicable:(b)
Alternateor
opposing
claim(s)are
unclearor
unfocused.]

Organization

(c)Consistent

(c)Adequate

(c)Inconsistent (c)Limiteduse

(a)Claimis
unfocused
and/or
insufficiently
sustained.[if
applicable:
(b)Alternateor
opposing
claim(s)are
unclearornot
present.]

(a)Claimmay
beconfusingor
ambiguous.[if
applicable:(b)
Alternateor
opposing
claim(s)are
notpresent.]

(c)Feworno

3Waterworth

(ce)
Yourscore:2

useof
transitional
strategies.(d)
Logical
progressionof
ideasfrom
beginningto
end.(e)
Effective
introduction
andconclusion
foraudience
andpurpose.

useof
transitional
strategieswith
somevariety.
(d)Adequate
progressionof
ideasfrom
beginningto
end.(e)
Adequate
introduction
and
conclusion.

useofbasic
transitional
strategieswith
littlevariety.
(d)Uneven
progressionof
ideasfrom
beginningto
end.(e)
Introduction
andconclusion
arepresent.

ofbasic
transitional
strategieswith
littleorno
variety.(d)
Unclear
progressionof
ideasfrom
beginningto
end.(e)
Introduction
andconclusion
areattempted
butinsufficient.

transitional
strategiesare
evident.(d)
Hasamajor
driftinthe
progressionof
ideas/complete
lyofftopic.(e)
Introduction
and/or
conclusion
maynotbe
present.

Elaborationof
Evidence(fg)
Yourscore:2

(f)Relevant
evidencefrom
asufficient
amountof
sourcesis
effectively
integratedwith
appopriate
citation.(g)
Effectiveuseof
elaborative
techniques
("means/matter
s").

(f)Relevant
evidencefrom
asufficent
amountof
sourcesis
integrated,
though
integrationmay
beslightly
awkward,
general,or
imprecise.(g)
Adequateuse
ofsome
elaborative
techniques.
("means/matter
s")

(f)Evidence
fromsourcesis
weaklyand
awkwardly
integratedand
citations,if
present,are
inconsistent.
(g)Marginalor
inconsistent
useof
elabortive
techniques
("means/matter
s").

(f)Evidence
fromsources,
although
included,is
insufficientand
inappropriately
integratedor
cited.(g)
Elaborative
techniquesare
weak.

(f)Useof
evidencefrom
sourcesis
minimal,
absent,in
error,or
irrelevant.(g)
Elaborative
techniquesare
absent.

Language,
Vocabulary(h)
&Style
Yourscore:4

(h)Properuse
ofacademic
and
domainspecifi
cvocabularyis
appropriatefor
theaudience
andpurpose.
Propervoice,
tone,and
perspectiveis
used.Distinct
writingstyleis

(h)Useof
academicand
domainspecifi
cvocabularyis
generally
appropriatefor
theaudience
andpurpose.
Mostlythe
propervoice,
tone,and
perspectiveis
used.A

(h)Useof
academicand
domainspecifi
cvocabulary
mayattimes
be
inappropriate
forthe
audienceand
purpose.
Voice,tone,
and
perspective

(h)Useof
academicand
domainspecifi
cvocabularyis
largely
inappropriate
forthe
audienceand
purpose.
Voice,tone,
and
perspectiveis
inappropriate

(h)Uses
limited
academic
languageor
domainspecifi
cvocabulary
andhaslittle
senseof
audienceand
purpose.
Voice,tone,
and/or
perspectiveis

4Waterworth

Conventions
(ij)
Yourscore:3

Comments:
2

used.

distinctwriting
styleis
attempted.

maybe
inappropriate
orinconsistent.
Writingstyleis
vagueoroverly
simplistic.

orcauses
major
inconsistencies
inthepaper.
Simplistic
writingstyle
limits
effectiveness
ofpaper.

confusingly
inconsistentor
inappropriate.
Writingstyleis
unrecognizable
.

(i)
Demonstrates
some
syntatical
variety,and
haslimitedor
noerrorsin
grammar,
usage,and
sentence
formation.(j)
Standarduse
ofpunctuation,
capitalization,
andspelling.

(i)Someerrors
ingrammar,
usage,and
sentence
formationmay
bepresent,but
nosystematic
patternof
errorsis
displayed.(j)
Someerrorsin
punctuation,
capitalization,
andspelling.

(i)Frequent
errorsin
grammarand
usagemay
obscure
meaning.(j)
Frequent
errorsin
punctuation,
capitalization,
andspelling.

(i)Frequent
errorsin
grammar,
usage,and
sentence
formation
obscure
meaning.(j)
Frequent
errorsand/or
limiteduseof
punctuation,
capitalization,
andspelling.

(i)Errorsin
grammar,
usage,and
sentence
formationare
frequentand
severe,and
meaningis
often
obscured.(j)
Inappropriate
orincorrect
useof
punctuation,
capitalization,
andspelling.