VanErdewyk1

BrentVanErdewyk
Mr.Polking
ReadingComposition
10November2015
Narcissistic,HardtoGripIt
Thecrowdfellsilentwithanticipationastheyawaitedtheresults.Thewinnerforthe
bestfemalevideoawardgoesto,TaylorSwift.ThefansscreamedwithgleeasTaylorwalked
onstagetoacceptheraward.Taylorstartedtodescribejusthowthankfulshewas,butthats
whenshewasinterrupted.KanyeWesthadjumpedontothestageaswellandsnatchedthe
microphonefromTaylorshands.Taylor,Imreallyhappyforyou.Imgoingtoletyoufinish,but
Beyonchadoneofthebestmusicvideosofalltime!Everyoneseemedtakenabackbythis
statement(KanyeWestinterruptsTaylorSwift).WhywouldKanyedosuchathing?Whatwas
hethinking?ThiswasntthefirsttimeKanyeWesthasdonesomethingcrazy,andthiswontbe
hislast.Exactlysixyearslater,Kanyejumpedupontoanotherstage,thistimewithalesser
knownartist:Beck.ManyhavewonderedwhyKanyedoeswhathedoes.Manybelievethisis
becauseheisanarcissist.
Anarcissistbydefinitionissomeonewhohasaninordinatefascinationwithoneself,with
excessiveselflove,andvaintendencies.ButIbelievethetruemeaningofnarcissismgoes
deeper.Anarcissistmighthaveaninflatedsenseofselfworth,butthatisnotall.Theylack
empathyforothersandhaveanegotisticalviewontheworld.Narcissistsalsohaveadeep
desireforadmirationandappreciation,butbehindthisshieldofconfidenceandvanityisalow
selfesteemwhichishurtbyeventhesmallestcriticisms.Livingthenarcissisticlifestylecanbe
rough,mainlybecausethislifestylecancauseproblemswithrelationships.Whetheritis
betweenafamilymember,acoworkerorevenastranger,narcissistshaveadifficulttime

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maintaininghealthyrelationships.Narcissistsalsotendtobeunhappy,sincetheymightnot
receivethepraiseandadorationtheythinktheydeserve(NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder).
Narcissistsalsotendtoactoutaggressivelytowardschallengesandopponents.
Narcissiststhinkofthemselvesassuperiorcomparedtoothers,andtheywilltrytodo
everythingintheirpowertoprovethemselvesassuperior.Theyalsofeelliketheyareentitledto
certainthings,rangingfrommaterialisticitemstopowerandattention.Iftheydonotreceivethe
entitlementtheyfeeltheydeserve,theymighttrytotakeitthemselveseitherforcefullyor
throughexploitation(Barry).
Theoriginoftheword'narcissist'comesfromtheGreekmythofNarcissus.Narcissus
wasahunterwhowasbeautiful,andhewasproudofhisbeautytoo.Then,someonenamed
NemesissawhisbehavioranddecidedtobringNarcissustoapoolofwater,wherehefellin
lovewithhisownreflection.Narcissusjustwasn'tabletoleavebecausehewassofixatedon
thebeauty.Narcissusendedupdrowningbecausehewassoobsessedwithhisownimage,
andthustheterm'narcissist'wasborn(TheMythofNarcissus).
Afterresearchingthetopicofnarcissismindepth,Istartedtoquestionmyself.CouldI
possiblybeanarcissist?Ithinkquitehighlyofmyselfattimes,butIdontthinkImanarcissist.
Luckilyforme,IwasabletotakeafortyquestiontesttoseeifIamtrulyanarcissist.Iamproud
tosaythatIamnotanarcissist.Imnotgoingtolieeither,butthetestseemedveryaccurate
afterIexaminedthedetails.Thewaythetestworksissimple.Thequestionsanalyzeyour
personalitytoseehowyouscoreontheindividualtraitsofnarcissism.Basedonhowyou
scoredonthetraits,asinglenumberiscalculatedrepresentinghowmuchofanarcissistyou
are.Ipersonallyscoreda10,withtheaveragebeing1215andnarcissistsscoringover20.
Thetraitsthetestutilizesarethefollowingseven:authority,selfsufficiency,superiority,
exhibitionism,exploitativeness,vanity,andentitlement.Authoritydealswithleadershipand

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powerhungrypeople.Selfsufficiencydealswithhowwellyouareabletodosomethingonyour
ownwithoutothershelp.Superioritydealswithwhetherornotsomeonefeelssuperiororbetter
thananother.Exhibitionismisabouthowmuchsomeonemaycraveattention.Exploitativeness
showshowwillingyouaretoexploitsomeonetogetyourway.Vanitydealswiththeexcessive
prideoradorationtowardsonesownappearanceorachievements,andentitlementiswhenyou
thinkyoushouldgetautomaticpraise.Takingacloselookintothetraitsthemselvestodefine
someonesnarcissismisalotbetterthanjustlookingatthewholepicture.Noteveryonehasthe
samelevelofnarcissism,thereforemakingthisacomplextopic(NarcissisticPersonality
Inventory).
Someotherrecentresearchhasevengoneontosaythatthefortyquestiontestmaynot
evenbenecessary.Thefortyquestionswouldthenbereplacedbytheonequestiontest,where
youwouldbeabletogetyourresultsinstantaneously.Thequestionis,Areyouanarcissist?I
couldseehowstudieswouldshowthatnarcissistsalreadyunderstandthattheyarenarcissists
becausetheyactsonarcissistic,butImnotsureaboutthereliabilityofthistest.Iwasnteven
toosureifIwasanarcissistbeforeItookthefortyquestiontest,sothisonequestiontest
wouldntworkforme.Whilelessreliable,thiscouldbethesimplestwaytofigureoutifsomeone
isanarcissistornot(Bratskeir).
Narcissisminourmodernsocietyisnothingnew.Youmaynotbeabletodistinguish
narcissismrightaway,butitisveryprominentinAmericanculture.Studieshaveshownthatthe
numberofnarcissistsinAmericahasdoubledoverthepast30years.Thesefindingsarent
surprisingtothosethatbelievethatthisgenerationisselfabsorbed,itactuallyjustsolidifiestheir
thinking.Itshouldntbeshockingeither,becausethisgenerationisbombardedwithnarcissism
onsocialmediaallthetime.Itsalmostlikeacompetitionnow:seeingwhocangetthemost
likes/favorites,whohasthemostfriends,andwhocangetthemostattention.Technologyand

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timespentonsocialmediaishurtingthewaysomechildrendevelopcommunicationskills.
Insteadofactuallysocializingwithotherpeopleinreallife,kidsarenowstucktotheirscreensin
theirdigitalworld(Taylor).
Narcissismhasevenbecomeatopicofdiscussionbetweencelebritiesandhaseven
seepedthroughintotheentertainmentweconsume.Mostentertainerswillgoontosaythat
theyarenotnarcissistic,andthattheyaredowntoEarthandhumble,butthereareaselect
fewwhowilldotheopposite(youwouldthinkthatbeinghumblewouldhelpyourimage).The
rapper,TechN9ne,madehisstatementwithhissongHesAMentalGiant.Inthesong,he
goesontotalkabouthowgreatheiscomparedtoeveryoneelse,andheevenmentionsthathe
isanarcissist.Whileitiscommonforsomeonetostatetheyarethebestintherap/hiphop
genre,nothinghaseverbeentothismuchofadegree.Thiswasalsoreiteratedinthemusic
videoforoneofhismostrecentsongs,WeJustWannaParty.Inthevideo,TechN9neis
wearingasweatshirtwith,Formalineprintedonthefront,implyingthatheissopopularthat
peoplemightaswelljustformthelinenow.Thisvisualgoeswellwiththefollowinglineinthe
song:EverybodywantaphotowiththeNina(TechN9ne),Imastar.
Ontheflipside,TechN9necanalsobeverypersonalandlovinginhissongsaswell.
Therearesongswherehementionsthathejustwantstolightuptheworldandburnout
everyonesproblems.Whyistheresuchadrasticchangeintonebetweensomeofhissongs?
Oneminutehestalkingabouthowgreatheis,andthenexthementionsthathewants
everyonetobeatpeace.Therearecertainpartsonsomeofhisalbumsthathaveselected
themestiedinwiththem,andmultiplesongsinthatsectionwillsharethatonetheme.Agood
exampleofthiswouldbeonhis2013albumtitled
SomethingElse.
Thealbumissplitintothree
parts:Fire,Water,andEarth.Eachsectionhastheirrespectivetheme,andwhilethetransition
fromonethemetoanothercanbeveryrough,itshowswhyTechN9nehassuchavarietyof

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songs.Songsingeneralallhaveacertainmoodtothem,andasartistsgothroughvarious
moods,theirmusicfollowsthatpath.
AnothergreatexampleofnarcissismwehavealreadymentionedbeforeisKanyeWest.
Kanyehasgoneonrecordtosaythefollowingstatements:heisagod,heisagenius,heis
mentallyaheadofeveryoneelsebyatleasttenyears,heisanindividualandnobodyelseislike
him,andthatheisdope.CompareddirectlytoTechN9ne,Kanyeisdefinitelymoreseverewith
hisstatements.Thisisalsoagreatexampleabouthowtherearedifferentlevelsofnarcissism.If
youweretoleavethediscussionofKanyeatthat,thenhewouldseemlikeacrazyand
narcissisticgoon,butlookingcloserweseesomethingelse.HereswhatDr.RachelKitson,a
psychologistfromtheShrinkTank,hadtosayaboutKanye:
KanyetitledasongIamaGod,soperhapshespolytheistic,butsomehave
jumpedtotheconclusionthatthisisfurtherproofofKanyesegomania(in
conjunctionwithanumberofdeclarationshehasmadeininterviews).However,
thelyricsaremoresecular,ofamorehumanisticandnaturalisticapproachto
conceptualizingarelationshipwithwhateverhigherpowermayexist,than
religious.Andwhilehemayhaveinflatedselfesteemandanexaggeratedsense
ofhisownimportance,Kanyeseemstobeexploringfaithandreligiosityandhis
ownrelationshipwithGod,ratherthandeclaringthatheisactuallyadeity.
Thatdoesntsoundnarcissisticatall,whichissurprisingconsideringthetitle(Kitson).This
bringsupthequestion,couldcelebritiesbeusingnarcissismasapublicitystunt?Couldthese
artistsbeputtingonanacttogetmoreattention?
Tofindtheanswerastowhypeoplebecomenarcissistsinthefirstplace,Ibelievethat
wewouldhavetogobackandfindouthowthesenarcissisticideasformed.Recentresearch
haslookedattheconnectionsbetweennarcissismandworry,andwecanseeapossibilityof

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hownarcissisticideasmayform.Theconnectionbetweennarcissismandworrydealswithwhat
liesbeneaththesurfaceofthenarcissist.Asstatedpreviously,thenarcissistmaylookbullet
proofontheoutside,whileafragilelowselfesteemliesontheinside.Tocopewiththeworry
andanxietycausedbylowselfesteem,theymightindulgeinnarcissisticacts.Whilethiscould
makethemfeelbetter,itisonlyatemporarysolutiontoamorepermanentproblem.Many
researchersoftenthinkthatitcouldalsodealwithhowpeoplewereraised.Growingupwitha
lesssupportiveparentcouldbeharmfultoonesselfesteem.Ifsomeoneisnotgivenenough
encouragementandisraisedwithalowselfesteem,itcouldleadthemtonarcissism.Theviews
ofothersalsoplaysalargeroleinsomeonesselfesteem.Ifsomeonewithalowselfesteem
receiveseventheslightestcriticism,thatcouldenduphurtingthemmorethanwhatwas
intended.Theworryandanxietyplusalowselfesteemallendupleadingtonarcissism(Kelly).
Intheend,narcissismcanbeacomplextopictodealwith.Therearedifferenttypesof
narcissism,differenttraits,andevendifferentseveritylevels.Narcissismhasembeddeditself
intooursociety,whetheritbethroughourpopculture,ourphilosophy,andevenintoourown
personallives.Narcissismisallaroundus,youjusthavetoknowwheretolookAtme.Look
atme.

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WorksCited

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Bratskeir,Kate."ThisOneQuestionCanTellYouIfSomeone'sANarcissist."
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"KanyeWestInterruptsTaylorSwiftonStageattheVMAs2009."
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2015.Web.5Nov.2015.

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Taylor,Jim."NarcissismIsAliveandWellInAmerica."PsychologyToday.16May2011.Web.2
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