Why Do Couples Live Together before Marriage?

A recent newspaper article demonstrates that, according to a Korea Social

Trends 2015 report released by Statistics Korea, more than 60 percent of people
who were born between 1979 and 1992, known as an Echo generation in Korea, are
in favor of living together before marriage (Yoon). Interestingly, this rate is almost
two times higher than their parents generation shows. Since the traditional custom
has changed a lot, many couples would like to live together before marriage these
days. Likewise, as Individualism has spread out over the world and the number of
people who have liberal attitudes towards sex has increased, cohabitation is not
thought as a taboo or a scandalous behavior anymore. In general, marriage is
considered as a lifetime commitment. It is something that should be taken seriously.
For this reason, the cohabitation before marriage will be a reasonable step to
determine whether you can spend the rest of your life with your lover or not.
First of all, while living with your partner, you will learn more about him or her
who you might marry with in the future. No matter how long a couple has been
dating, it is rarely possible to know each other well unless they move in together. It
is easy to hide parts of their personalities or some of emotions they really feel. This
means that it seems hard to know what they are really like. To be specific, when
they live under the same roof, it is a great opportunity to realize the partners
lifestyle. Sometimes there could be some bad habits that can annoy each other. By
living together, the couple can see if they are compatible with those annoying habits
and it keeps them from getting surprises after marriage. In addition, cohabitating is
helpful to know how the partners spending habits before marriage. Because money

matters are unavoidable between married couple and also able to influence their
relationship satisfaction. When individuals think that their spouse does not handle
money well, they show lower levels of marital happiness (Britt et al., 2008).
Next, Cohabitation will be a preliminary step before marriage and it can give
the full picture about the marriage life. It gives the relationship a trial run before
marriage with less pressure. In this respect, living together is seen as a less
committed version of marriage, where couples who feel they are not yet ready for
marriage can cohabitate as a test to see if their relationship can withstand the
intense intimacy and sharing that cohabitation brings (Glezer 1991; cited in
Maldonado, 37). In other words, premarital cohabitation is a real life learning
experience of loving and adjusting on equal terms with lover. It is just one of many
possible tests for a potential partner. Furthermore, a couple with the intention of
getting married will take a lot of financial burden off and this is helpful for them to
raise money for wedding. They will split the cost of living such as rent, utility bills, or
maintenance fee, food expenses or some expenditures that cohabitating might bring.
In this way, they can save more money than they spend when they live separately
and make good use of the saved money for wedding preparation.
However, in terms of divorce, it is a controversial topic related to cohabitation.
It is often argued that living together before marriage offers couples higher possibility
of divorce later on. A study shows that couples who live together before getting
engaged and/or married are more likely to get divorces than those who dont move in
together until engagement or marriage (Rhoades, Stanley, and Markman 2009; cited
in Baklinski 2009). On the other hand, refuting previous researches that overstate
the risk of divorce for cohabitating, a study illustrates instead that what leads to

divorce is when people move in with someone before having the maturity and
experience to choose compatible partners and to conduct themselves in ways that
can sustain a long-term relationship. Early entry into marriage or cohabitation,
especially prior to age 23, is the critical risk factor for divorce (Kuperberg 2014).
Thus, what really affects the chance of getting divorce is not the fact that they do
cohabitate before marriage but the age of beginning relationship.
To sum up, when couples live together before getting married, they get to
know more about their partners who they will commit to marriage. For example, they
might notice some unknown habits including living or spending pattern, which are
hard to find. Moreover they will try to respect each others habits. Secondly,
premarital cohabitation is a practical attempt showing how marriage will really be
like. Without too much pressure on marriage, couples learn how to handle the
matters that probably happen in real life after getting married. Additionally, it
financially takes a major stress off both partners by dividing the costs of maintaining
a home. Lerner states, A relationship is like a dance: to stay close without stepping
on each other's toes takes practice (1989). Not only any relationships but also
marriage is up to lots of individuals efforts. In conclusion, living together has some
beneficial advantages for those who take their first step toward the marriage.

References
Baklinski, Thaddeus M. Study Confirms Cohabitation Leads To Higher Chance Of
Divorce and Lower Relationship Quality. LifeSiteNews.com. Life Site, 15 July
2009. Web. 5 June 2016
Britt, Sonya, John E. Grable, Briana S. Nelson Goff and Mark White. The influence
of perceived spending behaviors on relationship satisfaction. Financial
Counseling and Planning 19.1 (2008): 31-43. Web
Kuperberg, Arielle. "Does Premarital Cohabitation Raise Your Risk of Divorce?"
Council on Contemporary Families. The University of Texas at Austin, 10 Mar.
2014. Web. 05 June 2016.
Lerner, Harriet Goldhor. The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous
Acts of Change in Key Relationships. New York, NY: Harper & Row, 1989. Print.
Maldonado, Amias Shanti. ""It's like I'm on Human Layaway": Commitment and
Marital Decisions among Long term Heteroseuxal Cohabiters." MA Thesis. The
University of Texas at Austin, 2012. Web
Yoon, Ja-young. "Young Generation Not so Proud of Korean Identity." The Korea
Times. The Korea Times, 10 Dec. 2015. Web. 4 June 2016.