Shalom aleichem

The Talmud says that when people come home from services on Friday night, they are accompanied by two angels -- a good angel and a bad angel. If the table is beautifully set and there is a joyous and loving atmosphere in the home, then the good angel says, May next Shabbat be just like this Shabbat!, and the bad angel is forced to say, Amen! But if the house is a mess (both physically and emotionally), then the bad angel says, May next Shabbat be just like this Shabbat! and the good angel is forced to say, Amen! When we sing Shalom Aleichem, we welcome these angels into our company, and hope they see our delight; both in each other and in the holy moment in which we stand.
Shalom aleichem malachei ha-sharet malachei elyon, mi-melech malchei ha-melachim Ha-Kadosh Baruch Hu. Boachem le-shalom malachei ha-shalom malachei elyon, mi-melech malchei ha-melachim Ha-Kadosh Baruch Hu. Barchuni le-shalom malachei ha-shalom malachei elyon, mi-melech malchei ha-melachim Ha-Kadosh Baruch Hu. Tzetchem le-shalom malachei ha-shalom malachei elyon, mi-melech malchei ha-melachim Ha-Kadosh Baruch Hu.

Peace upon you, ministering angels, messengers of the Most High, of the Supreme King of Kings, the Holy One, blessed be He. Come in peace, messengers of peace, messengers of the Most High, of the Supreme King of Kings, the Holy One, blessed be He. Bless me with peace, messengers of peace, messengers of the Most High, of the Supreme King of Kings, the Holy One, blessed be He. May your departure be in peace, messengers of peace, messengers of the Most High, of the Supreme King of Kings, the Holy One, blessed be He

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candle lighting
The order for lighting candles at the beginning of Shabbat is unusual. Generally we say the blessing immediately before we perform the action, but the commonly accepted tradition, at least among Ashkenazim, to to light the candles first and then say the blessing. This is how the mitzvah of candle lighting is performed: 1. Light the candles. This honor has traditionally gone to women, but may be performed by anybody. 2. Many people follow the custom of drawing their hands to their faces three times in a circular motion, beckoning Shabbat to enter, once the candles have been lit. 3. After the third circle, the person saying the blessing closes her eyes or shields her eyes with her hands and says the blessing:

Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu, melech haolam, asher kidshanu bmitzvotav vtzivanu lhadlik ner shel Shabbat.

Praised are You, Adonai our God, Sovereign of the universe, who has made us holy by giving us mitzvot, commanding us to kindle the light of Shabbat.

4. Then the person who has made the brachah uncovers her eyes and looks at what are now the lit Shabbat candles for the first time. This is a wonderful time for a moment of reflection, and for wishing each other a Shabbat Shalom.

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BleSSing of children
Shabbat is a wonderful time for the giving of personal blessings. In many homes, this is accompanied by words of praise, affectionate gestures, and all the things that build connections with each other. There is a traditional blessing for boys and another for girls.

BleSSing for BoyS

Yesimcha Elohim ke-Ephraim vechi-Menashe

May God make you like Ephraim and Menashe

Why thiS BleSSing for BoyS?

Just before he dies, Jacob blesses his two grandsons, Ephraim and Menashe. He says they should become role models for the Jewish people in the future.

On that day Jacob blessed them, he said, In time to come, the people of Israel will use you as a blessing. They will say, May God make you like Ephraim and Menashe. (Genesis 48:20)
Ephraim and Menashe did in fact become role models worthy of emulation. Unlike those before them, including Cain and Abel, Isaac and Ishmael, Jacob and Esau, and Joseph and his brothers, Ephraim and Menashe were not rivals. Rather, Ephraim and Menashe were brothers united by their drive to perform good deeds.

BleSSing for girlS

Yesimech Elohim ke-Sarah, Rivka, Ra-chel ve-Layah

May God make you like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah.

Each of the matriarchs has qualities that qualify them to be role models. The matriarchs were strong and laudable women. They endured difficult home lives, hardships in marriage, infertility, abduction, envy from other woman, and difficult children. Nevertheless, these righteous women, through their individual passion, their partnerships with the patriarchs and their loyalty to God, succeed to build a nation.

Why thiS BleSSing for girlS?

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You can add to the above blessings, or replace them entirely, with the 3-fold priestly benediction, the oldest of our prayers.

the prieStly Benediction

Yivarechecha Adonai viyishmirecha

May God bless you and guard you,

Yaer Adonai panav elecha veyichunecha

May God make his face shine upon you and be gracious unto you,

Yeesa Adonai panav elecha vyasem lecha shalom

May God lift up his face onto you and give you peace.

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KidduSh
It is important to note, that just like a toast, Kiddush sanctifies not the wine, but the moment. The full Shabbat Kiddush is below.
Yom Ha-shi-shi. Vaychulu Hashamayim vhaaretz, vchol tsvaam. vaychal elohim bayom hashvii, mlachto asher asa vayishbot bayom hashvii, mikol mlachto asher asa. vayvarech elohim et yom hashvii, vaykadeish oto ki vo shavat mikol mlachto asher bara elohim laasot. Savri ma-ra-nan vrabanan vrabotai! Ba-ruch a-tah, A-do-nai, E-lo-hei-nu me-lech ha-o-lam, bo-rei pri ha-ga-fen. (Amen) Baruch atah, Adonai, Eloheinu melech haolam, asher kidshanu bmitsvotav vratsa vanu, vshabbat kodsho bahava uvratson hinchilanu, zikaron lmaasei vreishit. Ki hu yom tchila lmikraei kodesh, zecher litsiat Mitsrayim. Ki vanu vacharta votanu kidashta mikol haamim, vShabbat kodshcha bahava uvratson hinchaltanu. Baruch atah Adonai, mkadeish haShabbat. (Amen)

[Evening became morning]: The sixth day. And the heavens and the earth and all that filled them were complete. And on the seventh day God completed the labor He had performed, and He refrained on the seventh day from all the labor which He had performed. And God blessed the seventh day and He sanctified it, for He then refrained from all his labor from the act of creation that God had performed. Permit me, distinguished ones, rabbis, guests and colleagues: Blessed are You, the Lord our God, King of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine. (Amen) Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe, Who sanctified us with His commandments, and hoped for us, and with love and intent invested us with His sacred Sabbath, as a memorial to the deed of Creation. It is the first amongst the holy festivals, commemorating the exodus from Egypt. For You chose us, and sanctified us, out of all nations, and with love and intent You invested us with Your Holy Sabbath. Blessed are You, Sanctifier of the Sabbath. (Amen)

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hand WaShing
Ritual handwashing is performed between kiddush and motzi. Rings are generally removed, unless they are a ring that is never removed, such as a wedding ring. Water is poured from a vessel ( a two handled cup is commonly used, but not necessary ) into a vessel. Water is poured three times over each hand - some communities do three over one hand then three over the other, while other communities alternate hands. While drying the hands, the following blessing is said:
Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu, melech haolam, asher kidshanu bmitzvotav vtzivanu al ntilat yadayim

Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe, Who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us concerning washing of hands.

the motzi
Handwashing and motzi are closely connected activities, so we dont speak and make interruptions between the two blessings. Humming and singing wordless melodies, however, are acceptable and lovely. The challah is revealed at this point (to the admiration of all) then sprinkled with salt, and the blessing is said:

Barukh ata Adonai Eloheinu melekh haolam hamotzi lehem min haaretz.

Blessed are You, Lord our God, Ruler of the universe, who brings forth bread from the earth.
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havdalah
The Havdalah service marks the end of Shabbat. It should be performed no earlier than nightfall on Saturday night. Nightfall is the time when three stars can be seen in the sky. It is normally about 45 minutes to an hour after sundown, depending on your latitude.

4What youll need: A glass of wine or other liquid

Some fragrant spices A special Havdalah candle

The first of the four havdalah blessings is made over wine or another liquid. If wine or grape juice is not used, you should substitute shehakol nihyeh bidvaro (by whose will all things come to be) for borei pri hagafen (who creates the fruit of the vine).

BleSSing over the Wine

Baruch atah Adonai Elohienu, melech haolam, borei pri hagafen

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe, Who creates the fruit of the vine. Amen.

The second blessing is recited over fragrant spices. The spices represent a compensation for the loss of the special sabbath spirit. The spices commonly used are cloves, cinnamon or bay leaves. They are commonly kept in a special decorated holder called a bsamim box.

BleSSing over the SpiceS

Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu melech haolam, borei minei vsamim

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe, Who creates varieties of spices. Amen.

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The third blessing is recited over the special, multi-wicked Havdalah candle. Havdalah candles can be obtained from Jewish gift stores. If you cannot obtain a Havdalah candle, you can hold two candles close together, so their flames overlap. I have also used party candles (long, very thin candles) that I warmed up and twisted together. Lighting a flame is a vivid way of marking the distinction between the sabbath and the weekday, because we cannot kindle a flame on the sabbath. After the blessing is recited, hold your hands up to the flame with curved fingers, so you can see the shadow of your fingers on your palms. This is done because it would be improper to recite a blessing for something and then not use the thing.

BleSSing over the candle flame

Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melech haolam borei morei haeish

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe, Who creates the light of the fire. Amen.

The final blessing is the havdalah blessing itself, the blessing over the separation of different things. The blessing is recited over the wine. After the blessing is complete, drink the wine. A few drops of wine are used to extinguish the flame from the candle.
Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melech haolam hamavdil bein kodesh lchol bein or lchoshekh bein Yisraeil laamim bein yom hashvii lsheishet ymei hamaaseh Baruch atah Adonai, hamavdil bein kodesh lchol

BleSSing of the havdalah

Blessed are you, Lord, our God, sovereign of the universe Who separates between sacred and secular between light and darkness, between Israel and the nations between the seventh day and the six days of labor Blessed are You, Lord, who separates between sacred and secular. Amen.
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