Parenting Parenting (or child rearing) is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and

intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the aspects of raising a child aside from the biological relationship. In the case of humans, it is usually done by the biological parents of the child in question, although governments and society take a role as well. In many cases, orphaned or abandoned children receive parental care from non-parent blood relations. Others may be adopted, raised by foster care, or be placed in an orphanage. The goals of human parenting are debated. Usually, parental figures provide for a child's physical needs, protect them from harm, and impart in them skills and cultural values until they reach legal adulthood, usually after adolescence. Parenting models, tools, philosophies and practices Although race may be a significant contributing factor, social class, wealth, and income have the strongest impact on what methods of child rearing are used by parents. Lack of money is found to be the defining factor in the style of child rearing that is chosen, and minorities are more likely to have less wealth or assets available for use in their children's upbringing. Societal values and norms of a generation also have an effect, as in the United States where authoritarian parenting was the most popular until the 1960s when a backlash made permissive parenting the most popular in the 1970s. As times change so does the way parents parent their children. It becomes essential to understand parenting styles as well as how those styles contribute to the behaviour of the children. Models of parenting Developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind identified three main parenting styles in early child development: authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive. Maccoby and Martin expanded the styles to four: authoritative, authoritarian, indulgent and neglectful. These four styles of parenting involve combinations of acceptance and responsiveness on the one hand and demand and control on the other. Styles Each parenting style has a different impact on children. Although Diana Baumrind identified three main parenting styles and Maccoby and Martin added the fourth, the following authors talk indepth about each style and its impact. Authoritarian parenting style can be very rigid and strict. It is mostly patriarchical in nature and everything is often decided by the father. Parents who use this style have a strict set of rules and expectations; if rules are not followed it ends up with punishment There is usually no explanation of giving the punishment just that the children are in trouble and should listen accordingly This parenting style and parents who use a more authoritarian approach with power assertion and the involvement of physical punishment with little emotions of comfort and affection are more likely to produce a child with deviant tendencies According to this style is subject to producing children that can internalize and externalize undesired behaviours as well as developing problems in social situations. Also the punishment aspect of this parenting style also contributed to problems in school for the youth, their behaviours were often deemed undesirable This contributed to the youth conducting themselves in a deviant manner in the school as well as toward other children The authoritative style consists of following the same rules as the authoritarian parents. With having strict rules and expectations however there is more open communication with parents and children in the authoritative style They listen more to the child and how they are When children have problems with rules and they are broken these parents tend to be more receptive They monitor instead of trying to rule the childs life they are less restrictive parents but still assertive Permissive parenting is often the style parents try to stay away from. There is not much structure here for children, and parents often do not set rules or have guidelines for the child They do not have many expectations for the children; they avoid conflict and are more nurturing to the child. They are more lenient when it comes to misbehaviour and often do not punish the children for wrongdoing However, parents adapted to this style also end up with their children having a hard time communicating with them about things their children find important Children with less communication with parents tended to have more negative behaviours at school than those who have had some open communication with their parents Uninvolved parenting style is exactly how uninvolved is defined, parents are often absent emotionally and sometimes even They have no expectations of the child and regularly do not have communication or a nurturing feature to them. They provide everything the child needs for survival with little to no engagementThey are not interested in their schooling other than making sure they go and they are not interested in extracurricular activities they may be involved in. There is often a large gap between parents and children with this parenting style. Children with little or no

communication with parents tended to more often be the victims of other childrens deviant behaviour and involved in some deviance themselves There is no single or definitive model of parenting. What may be right for one family or one child may not be suitable for another. With authoritative and permissive (indulgent) parenting on opposite sides of the spectrum, most conventional and modern models of parenting fall somewhere in between.Parenting strategies as well as behaviours/ideals of what parents expect whether communicated verbally and/or non-verbally also play a significant role in a childs development Parenting practices Father and child, Dhaka Positive Parenting- unconditional support, guiding them and supporting them for healthy development. Attachment Parenting- strengthen the intuitive, psychological and emotional bond between the primary caregiver Unconditional Parenting- giving unconditional positive encouragement Spiritual Parenting- respecting the child's individuality, making space for child to develop a sense of their own beliefs through their personality and their own potentials Slow Parenting- allowing the child to develop their own interests and allowing them to grow into their own person, lots of family time, allowing children to make their own decisions, limit electronics, simplistic toys Helicopter Parenting- over-parenting, parents are constantly involving themselves, interrupting the childs ability to function on their own Narcissistic Parenting- parents are driven by their own needs, their children are an extension of their own identity, use their children to live out their dreams Toxic Parenting- poor parenting, complete disruption of the child's ability to identify one's self and reduced self-esteem, neglecting the needs of the child and abuse is sometimes seen in this parenting style Parenting skills Parents should remember that they are still individuals in a loving relationship, and adapt to parenthood. Parenting styles is a small part of being an effective parent. The skills parents bring also have a major role to play, and we now know that children benefit when their parents: communicate honestly about events or discussions that have happened, also that parents explain clearly to children what happened and how they were involved if they were stay consistent, children need structure, parents that have normal routines benefits children incredibly; utilize that resources availabe to them, reaching out into the community; taking more interest in their child's educational needs and early development; and keeping open communication and staying educated on what their child is learning and doing and how it is effecting them Effects of parenting, family and family structure on child behaviour Families whether big or small, rich or poor, can be subject to producing children with different behaviours in some cases these behaviours are desired and sometimes they are not Researchers place particular importance on how parents parent as it impacts children on all levels of their development As well as parenting style can be a root cause in producing undesired behaviours in Family structure Family structure also contributes greatly to child behaviour. When deviance is concerned many people will look at parents. This is important because parents are the primary socializing agents of children which means they greatly contribute to their child's behaviour. When children come from different familial structures it is essential to understand how that type of family affects their behaviour, especially in school. Intact families and single parent families often function differently from each other Many families show similarities, however who is in charge of the family is a key contributor to child behaviour. According to strain theory by Agnew (1985) it affects their development, how they relate to things and people and overall how they react to everyday situations. As transitions in families take place and as times evolve it becomes essential to understand how these transitions affect the family structure and those experiencing the transitions Children coming from a non-intact family which is often considered single parent families show higher incidences of deviant behaviours That is not to say that children that come from families in which both parents are present are not delinquent, these families show lower rates than those who only have one parent present Schroeder et al. (2010) discovered that families in which the children resided with the father had high rates of behaviour and delinquency problems than those households led by the mother Although mother led households experienced less behaviour and

delinquency problems their children were still having issues surrounding their deviant behaviours more than intact families Another contributing factor of single parent families on children is time constraint Most single parents work hard to keep their family equipped with essential needs Lack of supervision and lack of time spent with children deeply contributes and shapes their overall functioning and their behaviour especially surrounding delinquency issues Intact families also face time constraints but this is levelled between two parents which usually will allow at least one parent to be available to children This helps with supervision and communication which can often lack in single parent households Blended families also show some alarming findings, when single parent families transition into blended families, deviant behaviours, especially violent offending increases These types of families host a whole new set of experiences for children Accommodating a new parent as well as new siblings affect children deeply it can contribute to undesired behaviours These undesired behaviours can show up in the school setting as undesirable actions including verbal and physical components placing the child at risk for deviant behaviour in school Children experiencing transitions in their families often experience high levels of stress because of the transition The stress the children experience is closely related to strain theory. The strain that families experience because of transitions exposes children to negative stimuli, these negative exposures often put the child at risk to manifesting problems in other areas of their life because of the strain the family is experiencing Structure of the family plays a key role in the development of the child and whether or not their behaviour is deviant because of the structure they reside in, it becomes important to examine relations between family members Whether a household consists of two members or five members it is important to look at how each member associates with one another. Relationships between brothers and sisters and mom and dad will each have their own unique form as well as some of the same attributes. Communication is important in any relationship, especially when it comes to parenting. Its not only important between parents but also important with children Expectations should be clear and each member should understand their role How children react to situations with their siblings will give a parent an idea of how they will react around their peers The bond between parents and a child is important for the child to form healthy relationships down the road Also the bond between parents and children becomes essential in reducing undesired deviant behaviours in youth When dealing with issues surrounding deviant behaviour of children it becomes important to analyse the relationship between child and Communication between parent and child is important not only for both the parent and child and their ability to cohabitate but to also understand what each other are going through It is also important to keep the parent and child informed of their role When the child and parent experience positive open communication with each other it then gives the child a positive relationship to reference when conducting themselves at school with teachers and authority It also gives the child a well developed self esteem and better self concept which in turn allows the children to have high standards of conducting themselves positively to peers and in school The parent-child positive relationship also becomes important when the child is in school, when positive relations form at home children will have an easier time forming positive relations in school Children with good communication and bonding in the home bring positive behaviours to school which allows for good communication with peers, teachers and authorities The child will also have a positive bonding to the school community and their education goals This also reduces the incidences of their participation in school violence and acting out on undesired behaviours If the relationship between family members suffers it can leave children with the inability to make good judges of character for those they choose to associate with Conflict in the home can be damaging for a child to experience, it has a very deep impact on how they will conduct their relationships at school and how they will continue to develop relationships in the future How families deal with situations that arise with family members as well as how situations outside the home are handled can also be a key factor when dealing with behaviours of children This directly links to social learning theory; children will model what they have observed from family members especially parents, this is important in understanding their behaviour at school If negative reactions occur in the home and the child observes this behaviour it is likely they will have the same reaction should a similar situation arise at school When relations between members have negative occurrences it puts children at risk http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parenting Sunday, March 14, 2010 Filipino Parenting and Wimpification

Pinoy bashing always seems to be in style, most often by Pinoys themselves. Our cousin sent us an article that suggested that Filipino parenting, which they identified as primarily authoritarian, produced wimps who were unsuitable for democracy. There were no surveys, and the writer simply canvassed among people he knew who were Pinoy. He used a template of four parenting styles that were devised on an American website. Needless to say, the template does not suit all cultures as a means of measurement. For example, authoritarian parenting would apply to Chinese upbringing but I dont think they are wimps, and they dont think they are either. In the Philippines authoritarian parenting was more intensely practiced in my mothers generation, and all her brothers became successful. One was a Chief Justice of the Court of Appeals (Uncle Danny), another Archbishop of Lipa (Monsignor Gaviola), a third a doctor (Uncle Silver), another a judge (Uncle Nino) and finally a successful businessman (Uncle Alex). I imagine the authoritarianism was harsher the further back in time you went, but think of our Filipino heroes, Rizal, Bonifacio, Aguinaldo, Mabini, et al, who were quite young30 years old--when they played out the revolution. And today we have amazing men tooEfren Penaflor, Pacquiao, Arnold Pineda, Carlos P. Romulo, and Dr. David Manalo (St. Andrews Prize Winner 2007 for his project on River Fibre and Power) wimps? NOT! So I question the methodology, as well as the conclusions of this largely speculative article. I also wonder who the AntiPinoy is, as there is no staff box, no way of identifying who the writers are (although sometimes they link up to credible publications online). Red flag when someone expresses all types of points of view but is not willing to take ownership for it. Here is their website nonetheless: http://paranaquephilippines.blogspot.com/2010/03/filipino-parenting-and-wimpification.html Effective Parenting Styles Why Yesterday's Models Won't Work Today Have you considered whether your parenting style was better suited to yesterday than to preparing your child for the twenty-first century? Are you an authoritarian parent? This parent values obedience. Commanding the child what to do and what not to do, rules are clear and unbending. The parent pours the "right" information into the child who is considered an empty vessel. Misbehavior is strictly punished. Predominant for most of Western history, authoritarian parenting is effective in societies experiencing little change and accepting one way to do things, for example in agrarian-industrial societies. A master teacher (often the parent) instructs the child on each act (such as sow the seeds and weed the fields). The child learns by imitating the expert. This style mismatches a rapidly changing society which values choice and innovation. Rebellion often results from strict punishment. Spanking, which models violence as a solution to problems, is contradictory in a society which claims to value peaceful solutions. And children raised to follow the "expert" easily copy anyone, including undesirable peers. Are you a permissive parent? Popular in the 1950's and 60's, this style was a reaction to the horrors of whole nations following the dictators in Word War II. Instead of following, children are encouraged to think for themselves, avoid inhibitions, and not value conformity. Parents take a "hands-off" approach, allowing children to learn from the consequences of their actions. Misbehavior is usually ignored. Although those raised in this style are creative and original, they often have trouble living in a highly populated community as well as fitting into the work-force. Ignoring misbehavior gives no information about expected behavior. With no intervention, the bully wins, while the passive child loses, a perfect set-up to be a victim in later life. Aggressive patterns become ingrained when children are not guided to find acceptable ways to get desires met. Unlike the child-oriented 50's and 60's where one consistent adult was available to patiently guide self-discovery to the consequences of actions, today's society is fast-paced with a multitude of adults playing into the child's life each week. Without clear limits, children get confused, feel insecure, and can make poor choices. Are you an assertive-democratic parent? These parents establish basic guidelines for children. Clarifying issues, they give reasons for limits. Learning to take responsibility is a high priority. Children are given lots of practice in making choices and guided to see the consequences of those choices. Misbehavior is handled with an appropriate consequence or by problem-solving with the child to find an acceptable way to get desires met. Out-of-control children have "cool-off" time, not punishment. Children are part of deciding how to make amends when someone are something has been hurt. Assertive-democratic parenting is the best for today's fast-changing information age where choice is constant and there is no longer just one "right" way. Children raised by this style learn to accept responsibility, make wiser choices, cope with change, and are better equipped to succeed in a work-force which relies on cooperative problem-solving. http://www.kidsource.com/better.world.press/parenting.html