GOING THE DISTANCE: Alessios challenge sobriety

Submitted photo - Mike Alessio Seneca Falls resident Mike Alessio crosses the finish line in the 2007 Ironman Lake Placid, his first attempt at a full triathlon that features a 2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike ride and 26.2-mile marathon. Posted: Monday, August 27, 2012 10:46 am By SCOTT PORTER When Mike Alessio is invited to drug courts to speak to addicts and alcoholics, he wants them to know about life after sobriety. He tells them that sobriety is a springboard by which one can achieve great things. Alessio knows first-hand of what he speaks.

When his life, after 20 years of hardcore drinking, came crashing down upon him nine years ago, he emerged from drug court like a phoenix from the ashes. From a barfly to an Ironman. The drinking, when it started, seemed like harmless fun. The legal age when Alessio graduated from Mynderse Academy in 1979 was just 18. The partying at RIT was non-stop. The fun continued after college. Landing a job with the Steak and Ale Corp., Alessio went into the restaurant business, managing restaurants. Here, the pattern developed. He would work his shift, socialize and drink late into the night, be hung over in the morning, work his shift, drink late into the night, be hung over. Day after day. Alessio became something of a nomad, moving every year or so to a different city to manage a different restaurant. Relocation is the answer when youre an alcoholic, he says. Alessio had good intentions every time he moved he would join a gym, intending to pursue a healthier lifestyle but that would last just a few weeks before the daily partying began anew. It was in Detroit where the train started to derail. Alessio began partying with a tougher crowd ... and getting into trouble. There was a DWI. A judge sent him to jail when he blew off a summons. Alessio quit Steak and Ale and returned to Seneca Falls, moving in with his parents. He was now in his 30s. The partying continued. Between the drinking and the hangovers, Alessio was working at BonaDent in sales. He thought he could stop drinking if he tried. He didnt think he had a problem. One day, in the late 1990s, Alessios friend and boss, Bruce Bonafiglia, persuaded him to see a therapist in Rochester. To prevent a no-show, Bonafiglia drove Alessio to his first appointment. Alessio didnt know he was being chauffeured to an intervention. Waiting for him were his parents and siblings, who had traveled from Atlanta and Boston. They told him their love, their fears, their heartache. Alessio promised he would get help. And, he did. He went into a treatment program. However, he kept drinking.

He continued to drink after getting a DWI a few years later. When the DMV told him he wouldnt get his license back unless he pursued another treatment program, he blew off DMV. He drove with no license, no insurance, no right to drive whatsoever. And, kept drinking. On March 24, 2003, Alessio was a few blocks from his home when he was stopped by a state trooper. He was hammered. Felony DWI and felony driving offenses were filed against him. He was fired from BonaDent. When Alessio was arrested, drug treatment courts were springing up as viable alternatives to the traditional mode of prosecution. A drug court was just getting off the ground in Seneca County; Alessio believes he was its first felony offender participant. Alessio returned to treatment, more intensive than the first time, and became involved with AA. It appeared he was doing well. He was rehired at BonaDent. Still, he kept drinking. Alessio was never a solitary drinker. He did his drinking in the bars. After attending the treatment sessions and the AA meetings, Alessio went down to the Flats or to Reds and, as they say, tied one on. Alessios last drink was New Years Day 2004. He says that when people hear that date, they think that stopping the disease is as easy as a New Years resolution. Hardly. On Jan. 2, Alessio experienced a different kind of intervention. The drug court judge, Richard Mac MacConnell, told Alessio that his drinking was an open secret and he was getting kicked out of drug court. MacConnell sent him to jail, where Alessio traded his street clothes for an orange jumpsuit. Alessio had been in jail in Detroit, but this was different. He grew up here; his parents were still alive. It was humiliating. Nonetheless, because its home, there are people who will stick by you. He didnt lose his job this time. Bonafiglia visited him at jail and told his friend he was going to get through this, once and for all. After three weeks in jail, Alessio was given a last chance in drug court. It came with an increased level of accountability that got him over the hump. He had to wear an ankle bracelet and blow into a device called a sobrietor. For the first time in a long while, he stopped drinking. Then, as he says, I was beginning to feel what its like to feel good. Exit drinking, enter triathlons.

It was not Alessios plan to replace the alcohol with triathlons ... or anything else, for that matter. His focus in 2004 was to learn why he had the need to drink and to get better. When drug court came to an end, he asked if he could stay longer. One of the things Alessio learned was that, despite the hangovers, the incarceration, the breach of trust, the lying, his drinking and the struggle and challenge of trying to stop forged him into a stronger, more positive person. There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands, Alessio said. So, when Bonafiglia suggested in April 2005 they try the Musselman Half-Iron that summer, Alessio was interested. Emotionally, he was ready. Physically, not so much. Alessio had always been intrigued by the TV broadcast of the Kona Ironman in Hawaii, but doing one, in Alessios words, was a pipe dream. He was a smoker. He didnt run. He didnt have a bike. And, he didnt know how to swim. Doing something you have no business doing is something else Alessio has learned since getting sober. The positive force of blind faith: Hold your face up to the light even though you dont see it right now. Alessio bought a bike and running shoes. He had three months to conquer his fear of the water and learn to swim. He got through the Musselman in one piece. He remembers being the last swimmer to emerge from Seneca Lake and seeing his parents waiting on shore, his mother beaming. It didnt take Alessio long to know that the swimming, the biking, the running the movement was nourishment for his soul. Two years later, he was doing the Ironman in Lake Placid. Fifteen hours and 20 minutes spent swimming 2.4 miles, biking 112 miles and running a marathon. He had no idea if he could make the time cut-off for the swimming stage; he managed to beat it by six minutes. He did the Ironman again the next year, cutting his time by 2 1/2 hours. And, he did it again a third time in 2010. It turns out that Alessio has a gift for running fast. He qualified for the 2009 Boston Marathon and ran the fastest of his eight marathons there, 3 hours, 20 minutes. This year, at the ripe old age of 50, he has run his fastest 5K and halfmarathons. He has a gym filled with boxing equipment and is itching for a match. However, Alessios proudest accomplishment is the happiness of a marriage and family that he had long assumed passed him by. He tied the knot last year. He says his wife, Maria, and stepson Nicholas are the gifts for a man who freed himself from the chains of alcoholism.

Scott Porters Going the Distance appears on the second and fourth Mondays each month in the Finger Lakes Times. Contact Porter with ideas and input at jscottporter@verizon.net.