LEADERSHIP UNCUT | Brian Evje

Is Your Leadership Showing?

You're the CEO of your company. But do you look and act like a leader? Here are five ways to get started.

Most members of a team know when theyre doing their work well. They often have a particular area of expertise, and they have deadlines and deliverables. For leaders, its a bit different. How do you show that youre leading? Here are five competencies that good leaders demonstrate. They are related to one another, and each is framed with a question to help you think about opportunities to display leadership. 1. Visibility We know that leaders need to be seen by followers--from formal presentations and announcements, to a crisis, to simple managing by walking around. The less-obvious occasions, however, are easily overlooked. They can be lost opportunities, or powerful expressions of leadership. As a leader, when do you feel out of your comfort zone? Maybe its when you have to deliver bad or unpopular news, or mediate a conflict between direct reports, or perform a necessary task that you just dont like. One CEO client told me that he found it hard to celebrate the small to medium wins that his team wanted acknowledged. He considered these victories just part of doing business. His solution was to ask his executives to publicize accomplishments up to a certain level, allowing him to save his praise for the really big achievements. Ask yourself, How am I visible to others when I dont want to be? The answer is not to pretend to like being visible--far from it. Instead, ask yourself this question prior to an uncomfortable event, and use it to help you prepare. Consider some behavioral options, and put yourself in a different mental space. Then youll be able to be visible in a more productive, less stressful manner. 2. Preparation

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 1

Many leaders are great at preparing the logistics of leadership (the facts and figures in a plan, or the pitch for a presentation). Too many leaders, however, dont prepare regularly for the deeper daily requirements of leadership. This is a shame, because most leaders face complex challenges, relentless claims on their time, and increasing pressures to deliver on goals over which they dont have direct control. A bit of regular preparation goes a long way. Just as athletic activities involve physical, mental, and emotional energies, leadership is a wholebody practice and requires preparation of the whole person. The next time you are running through your checklist prior to a leadership event, ask yourself, How have I prepared my whole self for this? 3. Comfort This is closely related to preparation, because leadership discomfort is greatly enhanced by a lack of preparation. In order to be more comfortable as a leader and to appear that way to other people, you need to practice (which is simple preparation repeated). By comfortable, I dont mean perpetually happy or even relaxed--I mean grounded in your complete embodiment of leadership. Ask yourself, How do I display that I am comfortable with the responsibilities and demands of leadership? Look for nagging doubts in the back of your mind; or instincts that need to be surfaced around what you feel should be happening instead of what is happening, or that feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach about an issue not faced. This is valuable data, and if you do not address your lack of grounding and comfort, others will certainly sense it for you. 4. Listening One reason that modern leadership is hard is because an effective modern leader must listen to others. Though few people manage to do it, this may be one of the easiest competencies to demonstrate--provided you can resist the urge to talk. Ask yourself, What one thing can I tell myself as a reminder to listen more? Its vitally important that you think up an effective cue. If you cant come up with one, that in itself could indicate a deeper internal misalignment. 5. Blend This list started with visibility. When the opposite is required, a leader must blend in. Otherwise, he or she risks drawing attention away from the people and issues at hand. When you pull back, it makes it easier for other people to bring you hard problems, bad news, and perspectives that challenge the status quo. As a leader, its not all about you. The clearest way to demonstrate this is to find the right moments to step out of the spotlight so that other people get the attention they need. Ask yourself, When necessary, how do I lower the volume of my leadership presence? Though leadership can be hard to demonstrate at times, regularly questioning how you embody your role will serve your leadership well. Mar 26, 2012

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 2

5 Steps to Better Leadership Charisma

Charisma is not a substitute for genuine leadership. These five steps can help you develop, and blend, the two. Leadership charisma and personal charisma are very different things. They both involve the same kinds of personal attributes--the ability to project confidence, the capacity to engage others, skill in articulating ideas, vision, and goalswhich may explain why some leaders aim for one when they should be developing the other. Personal charisma is centered on the individual, as is the case with celebrities. Leadership charisma exists when a leader is charismatic in the service of the organization, for a greater good, or a higher purpose. While personal charismatic traits can help a leader, too much of a good thing becomes unhelpful. Leaders who concentrate on constantly influencing others, for instance, may reduce the motivation and ability of their people to stake out their own opinions. Here are several things to consider when growing your own leadership charisma. 1. Ask yourself: Why? The key to knowing which type of charisma you want to develop is rooted in your understanding of why you want to be more charismatic. You must ask yourself, Why do I want this? Do you crave attention, want validation, or are you trying to address some insecurity? Do you want to be magnetic because you think thats what a leader should be? How does being more magnetic serve your leadership responsibilities? How will this enable you to better serve the organization? To better attend to your unique burden of being a leader?

2. You must be comfortable in your own skin. This is a broad encapsulation of the vital importance of knowing who you are as a leader, and why you are a leader, before you attempt to change your charismatic capabilities. Your skin in this sense is everything from your personal values and drivers to the precise point you currently find yourself in your lifes journey. Ask yourself, What makes this leadership role at this time in my life the right role for me? How have I prepared? How will I continue to learn? Many leaders make the mistake of avoiding these difficult questions and instead focus on external characteristics of charisma. They simply think, I need to be more persuasive when interacting with my direct reports, and then go nuts trying to be more persuasive. Nobody likes that. Ungrounded charisma is abrasive and troubling. (Ill write about the dangers of charisma in the final installment of this series.) If you do not first determine how you fit into your own skin, it will be painfully obvious.

3. You must be comfortable in your own body. Effective charismatic leaders have a sense of their physical selves and an ease about how they show up in front of their teams. This is not to say you

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 3

have be Baryshnikov. But many of the attributes of charisma are expressed physically, and a leader must learn how to literally embody charisma. How do you physically interact with people? What are you physically aware of when you engage in one-on-one conversations, among a small group, in front of a large audience? How do you modulate your voice, your listening, and your attention? How do you non-verbally communicate your engagement with others? How do you invite others to engage with you? While the research is not universally conclusive, it is clear that the physical, unspoken interactions between people are overwhelmingly influential in human relationships. Leaders who do not work on how they show up do so at their peril. 4. Practice, ideally with a Coach. The attributes of charisma contain tangible and intangible elements and working with a trusted Coach provides a framework for working on both these elements. You need to have an outside perspective on your physical behaviour to learn about your internal thought process. For example, if you want to work on a tangible element of charisma such as public speaking, you must connect the physical work of evolving your voice with the psychological work of why the work matters to you. The recent film about Margaret Thatcher provides an excellent dramatization of a leader taking lessons to improve the tenor and tone of her voice and her ability to speak in public. As a result of this work on her physical voice, Thatcher discovered her internal leadership voice that was grounded in her personal convictions. It is a defining moment in her leadership development and the result of practice. 5. Practice in a safe place. Too many leaders think they can wing it when it comes to developing their leadership. They try new things in front of their teams without first practicing, sometimes without much forethought. Bad idea. Performing well in the moment depends on practicing before the moment. Practicing in private with a coach provides an opportunity for clarity on your intent, and allows for trial-and-error. While mistakes in public are inevitable and necessary, many mistakes are made much more usefully in private. The good news is that if you want to practice leadership charisma, a little goes a long way. You are not endeavoring to call attention to yourself you are developing new capabilities because your role requires you to shift your focus slightly and exercise these attributes. You dont have to become someone else or transform yourself. Just find the connection to your organization that will allow you to stretch yourself. As noted in a recent article on Presidential leadership in The Atlantic, Not even FDR was FDR at the start. He practiced, he learned, and he developed genuine leadership charisma. You can too.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 4

Increase your Leadership Charisma and Nail That Presentation

Original content by Deiric McCann, Profiles International Would you like to be a successful charismatic leader and get extraordinary results from your people? Leadership Charisma covers many steps to developing this, and outlines when you put to work in service of your business, it can have enormous impact. Since the launch of Leadership Charisma in January 2011, one topic in particular proved most popular. We have all had the experience of being amazed by a phenomenal public speaker, and felt a slight twang of jealousy, wishing you could extract some of their charisma and energy and inject into your presentations. Many people believe that those charismatic speakers are simply born that way, but the truth is, charisma is all about behavior. Many charismatic speakers share certain behaviors. Upon researching for our book Leadership Charisma, we spoke with over 400,000 people on what they perceived as charismatic behaviors. Therefore, we could outline what these behaviors are and share with you how to develop them. None of these behaviors are in-built or a quality that one is born with. 1. Plan ahead Plan in advance that you will exude confidence on the day. Rehearse over and over until you are saying your presentation in your sleep. Know you topic inside out. This confidence of knowing every minute detail will speak volumes for you in your presentation. 2. Dress to impress Your good looks are not an issue for your people to see how charismatic you are. However, on a scale of one to ten for turnout, ensure your personal grooming from shoes to clean fingernails is an obvious ten. People can form a first impression as quickly as 3 seconds so get a head start. 3. Warm them with a smile Did you know that a smile requires 10 muscles to do, and immediately effect the brain chemistry of anyone who comes into contact with that smile. Not only does it release serotonin (chemical that raises your mood) and Oxytocin (the bonding hormone) it has these wonderful effects on both Notes on Leadership Charisma Page 5

parties involved. Making people feel good will increase the chances of them perceiving you as charismatic. Such a simple thing to do, but its effect can be colossal. 4. Exude enthusiasm and energy Smiling is contagious, you catch it like the flu, when someone smiled at me today, I started smiling too! Anon Smiling is contagious, as is enthusiasm. A major factor of charisma is enthusiasm. From the moment you step in front of your audience, you must be excited to be there, so act accordingly. Walk with a spring in your step, people will see how enthused you are about the topic and will be instantly more engaged on what you are about to say. 5. Use your body to communicate People unknowingly have the ability to absorb a significant amount of information about someone based on their body language. What you are trying to put across may not always be consistent but it is human nature to always trust a person's body language first. Stand up straight, wall tall and with purpose. Momentarily, keep check of your posture. This will aid all previous steps and combined will allow your audience to perceive you as a charismatic speaker. Leadership Charisma outlines steps becoming a more successful and charismatic leader.

7 Traits of Truly Inspiring Leaders

The managers who inspire employees and colleagues to achieve greatness tend to have these characteristics. Do you?

After conducting interviews with thousands of executives, I've noticed there's a subset of bosses who inspire their employees and colleagues to achieve more than they ever thought possible. These individuals tend to share the following traits: 1. Purpose Inspiring leaders believe that success serves a higher purpose. When you ask what motivates them, they talk about making other people successful. Notes on Leadership Charisma Page 6

Uninspiring leaders believe that success is their higher purpose. When you ask what motivates them, they talk about what makes them personally satisfied. 2. Giving Back Inspiring leaders feel an obligation to "give back." Their long-term plans usually include pro bono work or even endowing a charity. Uninspiring leaders feel no such obligation. Their long-term plans are limited to cashing in and/or buying physical objects. 3. Gratitude Inspiring leaders are deeply grateful. They know that their success is hugely dependent upon accidents of birth and circumstance. Uninspiring leaders are self-satisfied. They secretly believe their success is a natural result of being smarter and better than everyone else. 4. Beliefs & Values Inspiring leaders treasure their beliefs. They don't wear their values on their sleeves, but their deeply held convictions pervade everything they say and do. Uninspiring leaders foist their opinions. They demand converts to whatever religious sect or management fad currently captures their fancy. 5. Empathy Inspiring leaders care about people. They agree with Bill Gates that the fortunate few have an obligation to help those who are less fortunate. Uninspiring leaders couldn't care less. They agree with Ayn Rand that the poor are merely "moochers" begging for a handout. 6. Team Focus Inspiring leaders spread the credit. They never brag about themselves. Instead they redirect praise toward everyone else on the team. Uninspiring leaders spread the blame. They are as quick to mention the mistakes of underlings as they are to toot their own horns. 7. Energy Inspiring leaders are uplifting. You come away from meetings with them thinking, Gee, I'd really like to work here. Uninspiring leaders are depressing. You come away from meetings with them thinking, Gee, I'm glad I don't work for that jerk.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 7

Every truly inspiring executive, manager, or entrepreneur I've ever met has shared most or all of the traits described above. Are there uninspiring leaders? Absolutely. And they're often quite good at motivating people. They just use different tools: primarily fear and greed.

10 Habits of Remarkably Charismatic People

Charisma isn't something you have. It's something you earn. Here's how.

Some people instantly make us feel important. Some people instantly make us feel special. Some people light up a room just by walking in. We can't always define it, but some people have it: They're naturally charismatic. Unfortunately, natural charisma quickly loses its impact. Familiarity breeds, well, familiarity. But some people are remarkably charismatic: They build and maintain great relationships, consistently influence (in a good way) the people around them, consistently make people feel better about themselves--they're the kind of people everyone wants to be around...and wants to be. Fortunately we can, because being remarkably charismatic isn't about our level of success or our presentation skills or how we dress or the image we project--it's about what we do. Here are the 10 habits of remarkably charismatic people: 1. They listen way more than they talk. Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond--not so much verbally, but nonverbally. That's all it takes to show the other person they're important.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 8

Then when you do speak, don't offer advice unless you're asked. Listening shows you care a lot more than offering advice, because when you offer advice in most cases you make the conversation about you, not them. Don't believe me? Who is "Here's what I would do..." about: you or the other person? Only speak when you have something important to say--and always define important as what matters to the other person, not to you. 2. They don't practice selective hearing. Some people--I guarantee you know people like this--are incapable of hearing anything said by the people they feel are somehow beneath them. Sure, you speak to them, but that particular falling tree doesn't make a sound in the forest, because there's no one actually listening. Remarkably charismatic people listen closely to everyone, and they make all of us, regardless of our position or social status or "level," feel like we have something in common with them. Because we do: We're all people. 3. They put their stuff away. Don't check your phone. Don't glance at your monitor. Don't focus on anything else, even for a moment. You can never connect with others if you're busy connecting with your stuff, too. Give the gift of your full attention. That's a gift few people give. That gift alone will make others want to be around you and remember you. 4. They give before they receive--and often they never receive. Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a real connection and relationship. Focus, even in part and even for a moment, on what you can get out of the other person, and you show that the only person who really matters is you. 5. They don't act self-important

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 9

The only people who are impressed by your stuffy, pretentious, self-important self are other stuffy, pretentious, self-important people. The rest of us aren't impressed. We're irritated, put off, and uncomfortable. And we hate when you walk in the room. 6. Because they realize other people are more important. You already know what you know. You know your opinions. You know your perspectives and points of view. That stuff isn't important, because it's already yours. You can't learn anything from yourself. But you don't know what other people know, and everyone, no matter who they are, knows things you don't know. That makes them a lot more important than you--because they're people you can learn from. 7. They shine the spotlight on others. No one receives enough praise. No one. Tell people what they did well. Wait, you say you don't know what they did well? Shame on you--it's your job to know. It's your job to find out ahead of time. Not only will people appreciate your praise, they'll appreciate the fact you care enough to pay attention to what they're doing. Then they'll feel a little more accomplished and a lot more important. 8. They choose their words. The words you use impact the attitude of others. For example, you don't have to go to a meeting; you get to go meet with other people. You don't have to create a presentation for a new client; you get to share cool stuff with other people. You don't have to go to the gym; you get to work out and improve your health and fitness. You don't have to interview job candidates; you get to select a great person to join your team.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 10

We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic, fulfilled people. The words you choose can help other people feel better about themselves--and make you feel better about yourself, too. 9. They don't discuss the failings of others... Granted, we all like hearing a little gossip. We all like hearing a little dirt. The problem is, we don't necessarily like--and we definitely don't respect--the people who dish that dirt. Don't laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them. 10. ...But they readily admit their failings. Incredibly successful people are often assumed to have charisma simply because they're successful. Their success seems to create a halo effect, almost like a glow. Keyword is seem. You don't have to be incredibly successful to be remarkably charismatic. Scratch the shiny surface, and many successful people have all the charisma of a rock. But you do have to be incredibly genuine to be remarkably charismatic. Be humble. Share your screwups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale. And laugh at yourself. While you should never laugh at other people, you should always laugh at yourself. People won't laugh at you. People will laugh laugh with you. They'll like you better for it--and they'll want to be around you a lot more.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 11

9 Beliefs of Remarkably Successful People

The most successful people in business approach their work differently than most. See how they think--and why it works.

I'm fortunate enough to know a number of remarkably successful people. Regardless of industry or profession, they all share the same perspectives and beliefs. And they act on those beliefs: 1. Time doesn't fill me. I fill time. Deadlines and time frames establish parameters, but typically not in a good way. The average person who is given two weeks to complete a task will instinctively adjust his effort so it actually takes two weeks. Forget deadlines, at least as a way to manage your activity. Tasks should only take as long as they need to take. Do everything as quickly and effectively as you can. Then use your "free" time to get other things done just as quickly and effectively. Average people allow time to impose its will on them; remarkable people impose their will on their time. 2. The people around me are the people I chose. Some of your employees drive you nuts. Some of your customers are obnoxious. Some of your friends are selfish, all-about-me jerks. You chose them. If the people around you make you unhappy it's not their fault. It's your fault. They're in your professional or personal life because you drew them to you--and you let them remain. Think about the type of people you want to work with. Think about the types of customers you would enjoy serving. Think about the friends you want to have.

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 12

Then change what you do so you can start attracting those people. Hardworking people want to work with hardworking people. Kind people like to associate with kind people. Remarkable employees want to work for remarkable bosses. Successful people are naturally drawn to successful people. 3. I have never paid my dues. Dues aren't paid, past tense. Dues get paid, each and every day. The only real measure of your value is the tangible contribution you make on a daily basis. No matter what you've done or accomplished in the past, you're never too good to roll up your sleeves, get dirty, and do the grunt work. No job is ever too menial, no task ever too unskilled or boring. Remarkably successful people never feel entitled--except to the fruits of their labor. 4. Experience is irrelevant. Accomplishments are everything. You have "10 years in the Web design business." Whoopee. I don't care how long you've been doing what you do. Years of service indicate nothing; you could be the worst 10-year programmer in the world. I care about what you've done: how many sites you've created, how many back-end systems you've installed, how many customer-specific applications you've developed (and what kind)... all that matters is what you've done. Successful people don't need to describe themselves using hyperbolic adjectives like passionate, innovative, driven, etc. They can just describe, hopefully in a humble way, what they've done. 5. Failure is something I accomplish; it doesn't just happen to me. Ask people why they have been successful. Their answers will be filled with personal pronouns: I, me, and the sometimes too occasional we. Ask them why they failed. Most will revert to childhood and instinctively distance themselves, like the kid who says, "My toy got broken..." instead of, "I broke my toy." They'll say the economy tanked. They'll say the market wasn't ready. They'll say their suppliers couldn't keep up. They'll say it was someone or something else. And by distancing themselves, they don't learn from their failures. Occasionally something completely outside your control will cause you to fail. Most of the time, though, it's you. And that's okay. Every successful person has failed. Numerous times. Most of them have failed a lot more often than you. That's why they're successful now. Embrace every failure: Own it, learn from it, and take full responsibility for making sure that next time, things will turn out differently. Notes on Leadership Charisma Page 13

6. Volunteers always win. Whenever you raise your hand you wind up being asked to do more. That's great. Doing more is an opportunity: to learn, to impress, to gain skills, to build new relationships--to do something more than you would otherwise been able to do. Success is based on action. The more you volunteer, the more you get to act. Successful people step forward to create opportunities. Remarkably successful people sprint forward. 7. As long as I'm paid well, it's all good. Specialization is good. Focus is good. Finding a niche is good. Generating revenue is great. Anything a customer will pay you a reasonable price to do--as long as it isn't unethical, immoral, or illegal--is something you should do. Your customers want you to deliver outside your normal territory? If they'll pay you for it, fine. They want you to add services you don't normally include? If they'll pay you for it, fine. The customer wants you to perform some relatively manual labor and you're a high-tech shop? Shut up, roll 'em up, do the work, and get paid. Only do what you want to do and you might build an okay business. Be willing to do what customers want you to do and you can build a successful business. Be willing to do even more and you can build a remarkable business. And speaking of customers... 8. People who pay me always have the right to tell me what to do. Get over your cocky, pretentious, I-must-be-free-to-express-my-individuality self. Be that way on your own time. The people who pay you, whether customers or employers, earn the right to dictate what you do and how you do it--sometimes down to the last detail. Instead of complaining, work to align what you like to do with what the people who pay you want you to do. Then you turn issues like control and micro-management into non-issues. 9. The extra mile is a vast, unpopulated wasteland. Everyone says they go the extra mile. Almost no one actually does. Most people who go there think, "Wait... no one else is here... why am I doing this?" and leave, never to return. That's why the extra mile is such a lonely place. That's also why the extra mile is a place filled with opportunities. Notes on Leadership Charisma Page 14

Be early. Stay late. Make the extra phone call. Send the extra email. Do the extra research. Help a customer unload or unpack a shipment. Don't wait to be asked; offer. Don't just tell employees what to do--show them what to do and work beside them. Every time you do something, think of one extra thing you can do--especially if other people aren't doing that one thing. Sure, it's hard. But that's what will make you different. And over time, that's what will make you incredibly successful.

Make a Great First Impression: 7 Smart Tricks

People decide whether to work with you within two seconds of meeting you. Here's how to make an impact.

Research shows that customers decide whether or not they want to work with you within two seconds of meeting you face to face. That puts the burden on you to make certain that those two seconds really count. The only way to do that is to prepare ahead of time. These tricks may help. 1. Keep Yourself Fit Your energy level is dependent upon your overall level of health. If you tire easily, rest assured you're likely to look tired--especially under the stress of an initial meeting. And if you look tired, other people will make the snap decision that you're too tired to get the job done. This does not mean that you need to be a bodybuilder or Hollywood thin. But you must be healthy enough to look alert, capable, and interested. 2. Research the Culture

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 15

Different industries have different norms about what's appropriate in terms of personal appearance and meeting behavior. For example, wearing an Armani suit to a meeting with a programmer is simply inviting silent ridicule. Similarly, different regions of the country (or the world, for that matter) have different norms. Women who wear even slightly sexy outfits can send the wrong message to managers from the Middle East, for instance. Find out what's expected before you meet. 3. Send Clear Signals Your semiotics are the signals that your appearance immediately communicates to other people. People make snap judgments based on clothes, accessories, and more: watches, jewelry, briefcases, makeup, skin tone, facial expression, and so forth. As far as is practical, make sure you are consciously creating a set of visual signals that is most likely to communicate that you're the kind of person that's it's appropriate to do business with. 4. Create the Best Greeting There are three parts to your greeting: your smile, your words, and your handshake (or your bow, in some parts of the world). These vary according to situation. Research is key: For example, some cultures view toothy grins as vulgar. Your words should be appropriately formal (or informal). Handshakes should generally be firm rather than crushing or limp. (And bowing is very specific to the situation.) Do your homework! 5. Know Your Agenda A huge part of a first impression hinges on whether you seem confident in yourself and what you've got to offer. People sense at gut level whether you're prepared for the subsequent meeting or just planning to wing it. That's why it's important to know what you want to accomplish at the meeting and be ready to accomplish it. Being thoroughly prepared creates a poise that silently communicates you're credible and reliable. 6. Rehearse Your Entrance Now that you've put all the parts together, do a dress rehearsal of how you'll enter the room--or, if it's the other person who's entering, how you'll stand and deliver your greeting. Rehearse it enough times so that it all becomes second nature, rather than merely rote memorization. If possible, practice with a colleague and get feedback. 7. Measure and Adjust Since first impressions are so crucial to success, you'll want to track the results of your efforts. After each initial meeting, note the response of the people you've just met. Pay attention to facial expressions, statements, and subsequent behavior. If the meeting also included a trusted colleague, ask for feedback. Did the first impression you made help or hinder? Where is there room for improvement?

Notes on Leadership Charisma

Page 16