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Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Herald

There are limits to helping child who doesnt help themselves

Dear Annie: My husband, received an invitation to my Paul, wants nothing to do second cousins high school with my 36-year-old son, graduation. The same day, Alan. I admit that Alan I received an invitation to lived with us too long and has her sisters wedding with done some terrible things, but a note saying she also had hes my son and I love him. just graduated from college. Ive enabled him because of Mind you, I had not heard his health problems. He has from this side of the family in diabetes, epilepsy and vision years. (My husband recently problems and, in the past died, and I received no conyear, has lost 80 pounds. dolences.) A few weeks ago, Alan I sent a respectable amount threatened suicide and had a of money to the younger sisknife in his hand. ter and a lovely Paul didnt know Catholic Bible to what to do and the bride and groom called the police to (a Catholic friend have Alan arrested. suggested this). I We found out later was quite thrilled that he was doing to do this for them. drugs, so Paul But here I sit, kicked him out and months later, with issued a restraining no thank-you note, order keeping his not even a preprintstepson away from ed acknowledgthe house. ment. If the bride Alan was gone and groom are too for several weeks, Annies Mailbox busy, even a note living with various from my cousin friends. Despite the restrain- would diminish my disaping order, he came over yes- pointment. terday morning. He hadnt What do you think of this? eaten in days. His friends B.W. in Florida have abandoned him, and Dear Florida: We think he is homeless. Paul said he this is quite rude. You can, needs to learn, but I was of course, call your cousin worried sick and was so glad and ask whether the gifts to see him. But when Paul were received. A lost item is saw him eating at the kitchen always a possibility. And if table, he threatened to move you dont attend these events out. or know these people well, I thought I had found a you do not have to send anyhome for Alan at the local thing more than a card with mission, but discovered he your best wishes. was blackballed because of Dear Annie: I read the some incident years ago. Now letter from Bring Back hes on the street with no Wedding Etiquette about medicine, friends or money. the couple who requested But, Annie, hes my son. No donations for their honeyone should live like this. moon. I was aghast, to put it Paul refuses to let him mildly. Had I received that come back, even condition- invitation, I think I would ally. Im not crazy about have made a donation to a it, either, but I dont know national food bank in their how to get Alan the help he name and sent a note saying, needs. What can I do? A couples massage might Heartbroken Mother last an hour. This donation Dear Mother: This must in your name will feed a be terribly painful for you, family for several days. but there are limits to how Omaha much you can help a child who is on drugs and refuses to help himself. Contact Nar-Anon (nar-anon.org) at 1-800-477-6291 and ask for assistance. You also could call or visit the local mission and see whether they will give you a referral to another facility that might take Alan in. Dear Annie: In June, I

Tomorrows Horoscope
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 2012 A number of interesting changes could be in the offing in the year ahead, and they will turn your life around for the better. Your social, business and leisure affairs will all be in for a transformation. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) -- When it comes to involvements in which money is being exchanged between friends, things must be handled with extreme care, or someone, perhaps you, will end up feeling cheated. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) -- Even after youve achieved an objective, you must take steps to solidify what youve gained. If you dont, all could slip away. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) -- Friends and companions will be more impressed by the example you set than by the philosophy you espouse. Engage in more doing and a lot less talking. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) -- You shouldnt have to be told not to take any gambles on people or things that you know little about. Theres a chance youll be more gullible than usual, and you could easily be had. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) -- Inconsistency substantially lessens your possibilities for success. Its quite likely that youll do things in ways thatll only confuse the people who want to help you. ARIES (March 21-April 19) -- In order to stay in control when working on a critical task, you must maintain your patience throughout the job. If you try to rush your work, a mistake is likely. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) -Forget about trying for a huge gain by gambling on a big risk. If you cant pull it off, it might cost you far more than what you would have spent doing things the normal way. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) -By refusing to let others run certain things that youre ill-equipped to handle, complications are likely to arise. It behooves you to take your pride out of the picture. CANCER (June 21-July 22) -Be very selective as to which of your friends you can poke and tease without eliciting rancor. A sensitive pal might misinterpret your playfulness and take things seriously. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) -- If you dont handle your commercial matters prudently, any opportunities that do exist could slip through your fingers. Situations in which you would normally do well could end up a shambles. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) -- When you lack focus, youll be unable to bring your forces to bear on important objectives. Its OK to do less, as long as everything is done to the very best of your ability. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) -Be a positive thinker and behave accordingly. If you start feeling sorry for yourself and making unreasonable demands of others, even those who planned to help you will reject you.
COPYRIGHT 2012 United Feature Syndicate, Inc.

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