If you are interested in nature you must have seen the living world of the oceans on your television

screens.. Once I saw these amazing creatures that lived in the deepest parts of the ocean. Darkness prevails in the depths of these oceans. No light has ever touched these ocean beds. Light is an essential element for all living things,it made me wonder how did these small creatures managed to survive in such intense darkness, they were designed to live like this obviously, but there is another answer to it as told by Allah swt in Quran have you not seen that Allah is glorified by whosoever is in the heavens and the earth (even those living in the depths of oceans), and the birds with wings out-spread (in their flight). Of each on knows indeed his Salat (prayer) and his glorification, and Allah is All -Aware of what they do. Although these fish live in the heart of darkness they are enlightened from inside because they recognize their creator and worship Him even from those depths. Unfortunately all living creatures are not as intelligent like these fish especially humans who live their lives in the midst of hype and illuminations but still fail to realize one simple truth of the creation ,that God is one and He alone is worthy of all worship. Recently I attended a workshop on welfare work. In that workshop a letter of Mother Teresa was shared. She had written these letters during her life time and had desperately wanted them to be destroyed. Fortunately or unfortunately they were preserved by the church. Some parts of those letters are shared here:

"Where is my faith?" she wrote. "Even deep down there is nothing but emptiness and darkness... If there be God please forgive me."
According to her letters, Mother Teresa died with her doubts. She had even stopp ed praying, she once said. " I utter words of Community prayers and try my utmost to get out

of every word the sweetness it has to give But my prayer of union is not there any longer I no longer pray." And again : for me, the silence and the emptiness is so great that I look and do
not see, listen and do not hear As I heard these words I was stunned, it felt that I have heard the most tormenting words in my life. Mother Teresa! The divine symbol of humanity and spirituality the winner of the noble price for peace. A figure who is worshiped as a saint by many, these were her views about God? Its not that, that I was unaware of her eternal fate but as for the part that she played in this world one would have expected her to have a faith like prophets but instead her heart was ruled by emptiness. She longed for God but regrettably she was looking in the wrong direction for Him..for this reason my heart further ached for her.

That day when I came home ,after my prayers I was standing in front of my Alla h wordless ,ashamed and embarrassed because whole heartedly I have never appreciated the blessing of emaan bestowed upon me. I could not even ask Him for His forgiveness I could only glorify Him. For introducing Himself to me since the early years of my life. Like millions of people around the world He did not left it on my part to search for Him, to know Him. Allah swt did this job Himself for me. All of us who are born in a Muslim family must realize this that they are the most blessed people. Being awa re of Allah and knowing that He is only one and only this concept is worth then anything that the world possess. That day I realized how blessed I am that emaan, the presence of Allah illuminates my heart. This realization further pushed me into embarras sment. I valued my emaan more when I saw a heart yearning for it yet was unsuccessful to achieve it. We must understand that Emaan is the most essential element of our spiritual life and this is the factor upon which our eternal fate depends. Despite of its utmost importance unfortunately we dont value our emaan. In our busy lives we are lest bothered about the state of our heart , is it thriving with emaan or the intensity of emaan is low, we never we think about this. We are worried about our blood pressures and sugar levels, we keep a keen check on our weight , we have very firm observation on our profits but how many times a day we quit from the world and peek in to our hearts and see is emaan present there? How many times do we ask ourselves what good deed have I done today to increase my emaan. We dont put any effort for the growth of our emaan. We are also unaware of this fact that its one of our duty to work hard , to do good deeds so that we form a strong bond of emaan with Allah. The reason for this is that since our childhood this knowledge is imbedded in our minds not in our hearts that there does exists a God who is the creator and He is only one and He cares for His creation and when called upon ,He does answer. As this is only knowledge not faith it does not penetrates into our hearts. We grow up with this knowledge and act accordingly, we do worship Allah but we worship Him with our minds, our hearts are by now filled with the love and desires of this world . And the most agonizing part is that we dont even bother about our emaan. We never try to find ways that would increase our emaan. We must remember that by only getting a birth certificate from Muslim parents wont help us to attain salvation. We must ask ourselves why we are so casual towards our emaan. What is emaan? Knowing Allah swt. Is not Allah swt worthy of being known? Is there someone else equal to Him in any way? Are we not completely dependent on Him for all kind of needs? Is He not our creator, has He left any lack in our creation? Is He not the one who cares for us and loves us, protects us, relieves us from pain and suffering, keeps feeding us all our lives and we cannot even count all that He does for us! Still we run away from Him all our lives, we stand in front of Him w ith barren hearts, we consider ourselves too smart that is why we give our 100% for this world and not even 1% for Allah.

Mother Teresa had emptiness in our heart because she had no true knowledge of God. She was looking for God but in the wrong place so she failed in her life to find Him. But for us who know very well where to look for God that is in Quran and yet we dont bother to seek Him because we are drowned in our world ly deeds. Then we must remember that this behavior is a bigger sin that creating partners with Allah. As for Allah swt He is least bothered about our worship. He is worshiped by everything that exists in the skies and the earth like those fish that live in the depths of darkness yet their souls are enlightened by the awareness of their creator, and for mankind who can easily lit the candle of emaan in his heart still prefers to live in darkness. These letters further strengthened my bond with Allah swt. They made me more grateful towards His blessings. I remembered all those prayers made as a child for small things, doing wrong and praying not to be caught by elders, the school prayers for exams, wanting things to eat a chocolate or a toy my lonely moments when He consoled my heart, the nights I used to spend in the hospital talking to Him I was so sure of His presence. The moments in my life when I was depressed it was Allah swt who made me smile. Every time I fell off a cliff in my life it was Allah swt who taught me to fly. These kinds of experiences are shared by all of us when we are left alone and hopeless we raise our hands in a secret prayer and then we feel that our hands have been held by the mercy of Allah. My words cannot tell you how much you are loved by Allah swt and I cannot either explain the feeling of emaan, to access Allahs love you must seek Him and once you step in journey to find Him you will attain all the destinations just try it..

when I looked at those letters that she was so doubtful that she stopped praying this further made me grateful and I felt humiliated in front of my Allah because I remembered all those prayers made as a child for small things, doing wrong and praying not to be caught by elders,the school prayers for exams,wanting things to eat a

chocolate or biryani,my lonely moments when His consoled my hear ,the nights I used to spend in the hospital talking to Him I was so sure of His presense actually it was not my speciality rather He taught me to look for Him when in need .my doctors said I had great will power to fight my disease but it was the Love power of my Allah that strengthened me to fight all that illness. The states of my life when I was depressed I wanted to smile but the agony of my heart would not let me then I only did one thing I called Him and He like always answered He took me in His protection and instead of falling He taught me to fly and not only these ,those hundreds of thoughts which just came by and I even did not bothered to pray yet He was listening always listening and always loving God is so close to us why was it so difficult for her to figure it out I kept on wondering..Allah swt wanted to teach me a lesson here and I want to share it with you.Act

This knowledge turned into faith when I personally called Him in hours of need and He never disappointed me. Comparing myself with her I remembered all those prayers made as a child for small things, doing wrong and praying not to be caught by elders, the school prayers for exams, little desires things to eat a chocolate or biryani, my lon ely moments when He consoled my heart, the nights I used to spend in the hospital talking to Him I was so sure of His existence. The truth is that its not my piousness rather its Allah swt who taught my heart this verse of Faatihaa thee alone we ask for help. Each one of us is under the debt of His me rcy and blessings. And among His blessings the most essential blessing is the blessing of Emaan. As physically a heart cannot survive without oxygen so spiritually a heart cannot survive without Emaan. As Muslims we inherit the knowledge of Allah by our parents and as it is knowledge not emaan it stays in our minds and only a small fraction of it penetrates into our hearts as emaan. Our dilemma is that we regard this low flare of emaan sufficient for our spiritual life and very few of us strive for the growth of our emaan. Even this concept does not exist in our minds that a Muslim has to work daily for the growth of his/her .emaan. This is an ungrateful attitude towards Allah swt, what are we blessed wi th we can only realize its significance when we get a chance to glance in the hearts where there is a complete absence of emaan. Those hearts t hat crave for the God yet do not get any answer from Him just because they seek Him on their terms and Allah can only be sought on His terms. And His terms are so simply described in the Quran its so easy to connect to Allah to He does not let a heart of a momin into darkness neither He keeps it

empty rather when called upon He fills those heart with emaan.But I won der what is that stops us from improving our emaan. Why is it that we work hard for every opportunity of this world but its not even mentioned in our list of things to do that I have to find ways to increase my emaan. How would have you felt if you were no t given this blessing and you had to find it on your own in this world full of confusing theologies, you might have spend your entire life on a particular believe and at the time angels came to you would have known that all you have believed was not the t ruth.Allah did not let you astray Allah told you the direction which leads to Him now its our own will that we step forward towards the love and pleasure of Allah

It was by the will of Allah that my mind was not polluted with weird concepts of God. If I was born somewhere else I might have lived a life being unaware of Allah, I might have doubted His existence or would have fallen in to the traps of false deities. That day I realized that EMAAN is the most essential blessing of Allah swt. and what is emaan the firm believe that there does exists a creator who cares for you and does answers you when you pray to Him. Again when I looked at those letters that she was so doubtful that she stopped praying this further made me grateful and I felt humiliated in front of my Allah because I remembered all those prayers made as a child for small things, doing wrong and praying not to be caught by elders,the school prayers for exams,wanting things to eat a chocolate or biryani,my lonely moments when His consoled my hear ,the nights I used to spend in the hospital talking to Him I was so sure of His presense actually it was not my speciality rather He taught me to look for Him w hen in need .my doctors said I had great will power to fight my disease but it was the Love power of my Allah that strengthened me to fight all that illness. The states of my life when I was depressed I wanted to smile but the agony of my heart would not l et me then I only did one thing I called Him and He like always answered He took me in His protection and instead of falling He taught me to fly and not only these ,those hundreds of thoughts which just came by and I even did not bothered to pray yet He wa s listening always listening and always loving God is so close to us why was it so difficult for her to figure it out I kept on wondering..Allah swt wanted to teach me a lesson here and I want to share it with you.Actually we dont need to strive for the first flame of emaan that is sparked in our hearts its lightened by Allah swt so we dont value it and take it for granted. For us the so called Muslims we inherit the knowledge of Allah by our parents and as it is the knowledge not faith it stays in our minds and a very small part of it enters our hearts. so we suffices on this and do not strive for the betterment of our Emaan. Even though what is emaan we fail to realize this ,emaan is a discovery of Allah

,its getting closeness to Allah its the firm believe that you are being taken care of ,its giving away all your troubles in the hands of Allah,its the feeling of love and mercy from Rehman and Reheem Still how many of us avail the oppournunity to increase our emaan which is given to us five times a day,how many of us open the book of emaan to know about allah,how many times a day we think of Him?

That is why we strive hard for all the positions of the worlds, but consider our in born emaan sufficient and do not dwell to increase it. for us the so called Muslims we inherit the knowledge of Allah by our parents and as it is the knowledge not faith it stays in our minds and not enters our hearts .Because emaan is a discovery it has to be earned and if we had known actually who Allah is we would have not dared to disobey Him because we would have loved Him so much that the only thing that would have mattered to us would be His pleasure..

Any time at any place He could be called He never lets a heart of a momin empty, dark and doubted He fills it with His nur , His emaan and His love.

It has been so easy to call upon Allah, He gives us this opportunity 5 times a day we dont need to long for Him . Any time at any place He could be called He never lets a heart of a momin empty, dark and doubted He fills it with His nur , His emaan and His love. He Himself says this my servants ask about Me tell them I am near to them Allah is so close to us .yet why is it that those fish living deep down in the sea without eyes and ear know their creator ,their Lord they know on whom their existence depend and they glorify Him and that is why they are better than humans who with eyes ,minds and hearts fail to recognize their Creator. Why are the eyes so blind why dont the hearts perceive the signs spread out. As for us the so called Muslims we inherit the knowledge of Allah by our parents and as it is the knowledge not faith it stays in our minds and not enters our hearts .Because emaan is a discovery it has to be earned and if we had known actually who Allah is we would have not dared to disobey Him because we would have loved Him so much that the only thing that would have mattered to us would be His pleasure.. How much we love Him that can be seen how much we obey Him.
Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the worlds; 2. Most Gracious, Most Merciful; 3. Master of the Day of Judgment. 4. Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek. 5. Show us the straight way, 6. The way of those on whom Thou hast bestowed Thy Grace, 7 those whose (portion) is not wrath, and who go not astray.

All Praise belongs to Allah The Lords of the Worlds

The Gracious Most Merciful Master of the day of Judgment Show us the straight path Path of those who earned your favours Not of those you