By David Demchuk

What Men Really Want (and How to Give It to Them)

As I write this, we are about one month out of the annual gift-giving season (I refuse to call it the "holiday season" because, for knitters, it is no holiday), and I think I finished making the last of the presents about four days ago. Three cheers for me! The final weeks of 2005 saw almost all of our major religious holidays converge within the space of a few days. This meant, if you were walking through my neighborhood at anytime during this festive period, you would hear the characteristic sobbing and screaming that results from presenting The Man You Love with The Gift He Does Not Appreciate Or Even Like So Much. My neighborhood was especially noisy this year, with an abundance of stomping feet and slamming doors, roaring car engines and squealing tires. I am obligated to mention that women are no easier to shop for than men, but the key word here is "shop". While it is not uncommon for women to knit, crochet and sew (and hammer and screw and weld) thoughtful gifts for the men in their lives, it is the rare man who makes something for the women in his life other than dirty dishes. I am a man. I can say this. It is the truth.

All of this local turmoil led, as you might expect, to some sleepless nights -- which in turn led to my pondering the question: "What do men really want?" Since the first words that came to mind were "a Hummer," "an NFL franchise," and "Angelina Jolie," I decided to narrow it down to things that were a little more garment-friendly. And so, in no particular order: Men want what they already have. Him: "You know my brown vest?" This would be the brown, cream and grey Fair Isle vest he got from Sears six years ago that he only wears to your mother's place -- the one that is now a mass of strands and holes in the back of the closet. "How about you make me something exactly like that."

Men want what everyone else has and they don't. Him: "I like those hats." Those would be chullos, the ear-flap hats with pigtails that suddenly everyone is wearing. You could make something unique, something that no one else is wearing, but no. "I like those hats."

Men want what they wore when they were teenagers, and are convinced that they can still wear. Him: "How about a nice knitted tie?" You flash on a memory of knitted ties from high school -- and shudder all over.

Men want what other teenagers are wearing today, and are convinced that they can wear them too. Him: "Those skateboard beanies are pretty cool. You know, I'd like to try that skateboard thing sometime, if it wasn't for my hip."

Men want what leading sports and entertainment personalities wear. Him: "Oh, honey -- I love the sweater, I do, but -- why did you knit it with those colors?" Well, you like blue and white and red -- don't you? "Yeah, but not all together -- those are the Habs' colors (i.e. Montreal Canadiens). I can't wear those anywhere!"

Men want what their best friends wear. Him: "Jerry's wife made him a Maple Leafs scarf. Do you think you could make me one too?"

Men want whatever's cheapest. "Him: "You spent how much on yarn? What's it made out of, gold?"

Men want whatever's most expensive. Him: "What about that cashmere stuff? Is that good to knit with?"

Men want whatever's closest to the department store entrance, or to the sales desk.

Him: "Why don't you just buy me some boxers? Those ones you got me last year have a hole in the ass the size of Texas. Oh look, and there's something for you too," he says, holding up a travel lint brush. "You use these, right?"

This is the power of writing -- that in just a few hundred words I can bring a nation of knitters to tears. (I'm wiping at the corners of my eyes myself.) So, as a knitting guy, and as one who has knitted for his fair share of guys, how do I propose we resolve this dilemma? Do not knit for men. Ever. Just don't. Unless they're knitters themselves, they will rarely cherish your efforts in proportion to the time and energy you've invested, and you will hold it against them. All right, all right, this may not exactly be a workable solution for all of us. If you must knit for men: Don't knit them sweaters -- at least not for, say, the first five years. The legendary Sweater Curse suggests that if you knit a sweater for your beloved, the two of you will break up by the time it's finished, or shortly thereafter. What they don't tell you is why. Knitters are known for their determination and stamina, but few hearts are hard enough to withstand the sight of a man taking a freshly washed and perfectly blocked Inishmore sweater from its delicate tissue wrapping, then turning it back and forth in puzzled disappointment as he wonders why it doesn't say "Raptors" on it. Stick to smaller, popular projects, like scarves, socks, mittens and hats, so that any unexpected reactions will not lead instantly to divorce...or worse. That chullo that everyone's wearing? Go ahead, knit the chullo -- but make the details unique so that it's truly one of a kind. Also, in case you haven't noticed, every man is still a boy inside. So take that as permission to go a bit retro, with colors, patterns and motifs that bring back memories of his childhood. (Argyle is back. I'm not sure if that's a good thing.) Or look to pop culture -- film, music, television and graphic arts -- for images and icons that you can incorporate into your creations. Aliens (for a conspiracy theorist's protective headgear?), monsters (some werewolf slippers perhaps?), superheroes (a Batman messenger bag?) or even band logos, movie and TV characters, videogames and classic cartoons can all inspire great gifts. If you must make him a sweater -- and even if you don't -- find out what his favorite team's colors are and see if you can work with them. The Vancouver Canucks, for example, are maroon and blue and grey and white -- a good combination for a simple striped raglan, or for a Fair Isle toque and a matching fringed scarf...or even for a laptop bag and an iPod case. If he doesn't have a favorite team, check out his favorite shirt, his favorite chair, or even the inside of his car. Something he loves (other than you) will give you a clue about those colors he gravitates to, and those he avoids. If you're still not sure what he really wants -- ask him. Because my final advice to you is this: No surprises. If you live with the man you're knitting for, this is probably a foregone conclusion anyway. But either way, reduce the stress for both of you by telling him and showing him everything: the pattern, the colors, the fibers, the fit. No surprises mean fewer disappointments, and more negotiation and collaboration mean greater enjoyment for you both. And that's something every guy can get behind. But, um -- ixnay on the itted tie-knay. If he presses the subject, tell him there's no better way to learn than for him to knit it himself.

Photography: David Glen Supermodel: Terry Warne Author Photo: Asif Kamal

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

David Demchuk lives in Toronto. At his present rate, the only way he'll ever have an Inishmore in this lifetime is if one mysteriously grows on him in his sleep. David's obligatory knitblog can be found here.

Yarn

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Background

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Worlds Best Lazy Kate NEW 3 Jumbo Bobbins with tensioners. Anything but Lazy Kate. nancysknitknacks.com/LK2-a72.jpg TOP b.v. - Wageningen Food Design, Process Development & Innovation Management www.top-bv.nl Technical Textiles Source safely with us - own QC in China, Indonesia, Vietnam, Pakistan www.saentis.com.sg Geotextile Dalian Geo-Link Geosynthetic Co.Ltd More professional than thought! www.geo-textile.com Yarn consists of several strands of material twisted together. Each strand is, in turn, made of fibers, all shorter than the piece of yarn that they form. These short fibers are spun into longer filaments to make the yarn. Long continuous strands may only require additional twisting to make them into yarns. Sometimes they are put through an additional process called texturing. The characteristics of spun yarn depend, in part, on the amount of twist given to the fibers during spinning. A fairly high degree of twist produces strong yarn; a low twist produces softer, more lustrous yarn; and a very tight twist produces crepe yarn. Yarns are also classified by their number of parts. A single yarn is made from a group of filament or staple fibers twisted together. Ply yarns are made by twisting two or more single yarns. Cord yarns are made by twisting together two or more ply yarns.

Almost eight billion pounds (3.6 billion kg) of spun yarn was produced in the United States during 1995, with 40% being produced in North Carolina alone. Over 50% of spun yarn is made from cotton. Textured, crimped, or bulked yarn comprised one half of the total spun. Textured yarn has higher volume due to physical, chemical, or heat treatments. Crimped yarn is made of thermoplastic fibers of deformed shape. Bulked yarn is formed from fibers that are inherently bulky and cannot be closely packed. Yarn is used to make textiles using a variety of processes, including weaving, knitting, and felting. Nearly four billion pounds (1.8 billion kg) of weaving yarn, three billion pounds (1.4 kg) of machine knitting yarn, and one billion pounds (450 million kg) of carpet and rug yarn was produced in the United States during in 1995. The U.S. textile industry employs over 600,000 workers and consumes around 16 billion pounds (7 billion kg) of mill fiber per year, with industry profits estimated at $2.1 billion in 1996. Exports represent more than 11% of industry sales, approaching $7 billion. The apparel industry employs another one million workers.

History
Natural fiberscotton, flax, silk, and woolrepresent the major fibers available to ancient civilizations. The earliest known samples of yarn and fabric of any kind were found near Robenhausen, Switzerland, where bundles of flax fibers and yarns and fragments of plain-weave linen fabric, were estimated to be about 7,000 years old. Cotton has also been cultivated and used to make fabrics for at least 7,000 years. It may have existed in Egypt as early as 12,000 B.C. Fragments of cotton fabrics have been found by archeologists in Mexico (from 3500 B.C. )., in India (3000 B.C. ), in Peru (2500 B.C. ), and in the southwestern United States (500 B.C. ). Cotton did not achieve commercial importance in Europe until after the colonization of the New World. Silk culture remained a specialty of the Chinese from its beginnings (2600 B.C. ) until the sixth century, when silkworms were first raised in the Byzantine Empire. Synthetic fibers did not appear until much later. The first synthetic, rayon, made from cotton or wood fibers, was developed in 1891, but not commercially produced until 1911. Almost a half a century later, nylon was invented, followed by the various forms of

polyester. Synthetic fibers reduced the world demand for natural fibers and expanded applications. Until about 1300, yarn was spun on the spindle and whorl. A spindle is a rounded stick with tapered ends to which the fibers are attached and twisted; a whorl is a weight attached to the spindle that acts as a flywheel to keep the spindle rotating. The fibers were pulled by hand from a bundle of carded fibers tied to a stick called a distaff. In hand carding, fibers are placed between two boards covered with leather, through which protrude fine wire hooks that catch the fibers as one board is pulled gently across the other. The spindle, which hangs from the fibers, twists the fibers as it rotates downward, and spins a length of yarn as it pulls away from the fiber bundle. When the spindle reaches the floor, the spinner winds the yarn around the spindle to secure it and then starts the process again. This is continued until all of the fiber is spun or until the spindle is full. A major improvement was the spinning wheel, invented in India between 500 and 1000 A.D. and first used in Europe during the Middle Ages. A horizontally mounted spindle is connected to a large, hand-driven wheel by a circular band. The distaff is mounted at one end of the spinning wheel and the fiber is fed by hand to the spindle, which turns as the wheel turns. A component called the flyer twists the thread just before it is wound on a bobbin. The spindle and bobbin are attached to the wheel by separate parts, so that the bobbin turns more slowly than does the spindle. Thus, thread can be twisted and wound at the same time. About 150 years later, the Saxon wheel was introduced. Operated by a foot pedal, the Saxon wheel allowed both hands the freedom to work the fibers. A number of developments during the eighteenth century further mechanized the spinning process. In 1733, the flying shuttle was invented by John Kay, followed by Hargreaves' spinning jenny in 1766. The jenny featured a series of spindles set in a row, enabling one operator to produce large quantities of yarn. Several years later Richard Arkwright patented the spinning frame, a machine that used a series of rotating rollers

to draw out the fibers. A decade later Samule Cromptons' mule machine was invented, which could spin any type of yarn in one continuous operation. The ring frame was invented in 1828 by the American John Thorp and is still widely used today. This system involves hundreds of spindles mounted vertically inside a metal ring. Many natural fibers are now spun by the open-end system, where the fibers are drawn by air into a rapidly rotating cup and pulled out on the other side as a finished yarn.

Raw Materials
About 15 different types of fibers are used to make yarn. These fibers fall into two categories, natural and synthetic. Natural fibers are those that are obtained from a plant or an animal and are mainly used in weaving textiles. The most abundant and commonly used plant fiber is cotton, gathered from the cotton boil or seed pod when it is mature. In fact, cotton is the best-selling fiber in America, outselling all synthetic fibers combined. Fibers taken from the plant leaf or stern are generally used for rope. Other plant fibers include acetate (made from wood pulp or cotton linters) and linen, made from flax, a vegetable fiber. Animal fibers include wool, made from sheep hair, and mohair, made from angora goats and rabbits. Silk is a protein extruded in long, continuous strands by the silkworm as it weaves its cocoon. Synthetic fibers are made by forcing a thick solution of polymerized chemicals through spinneret nozzles and hardening the resulting filament in a chemical bath. These include acrylic, nylon, polyester, polyolefin, rayon, spandex, and triacetate. Some of these fibers have similar characteristics to the natural fibers without the shrinkage problems. Other fibers have special properties for specific applications. For instance, spandex can be stretched over 500% without breaking.

Fibers are shipped in bales, which are opened by hand or machine. The picker loosens and separates the lumps of fiber and also cleans the fiber if necessary. The carding machine separates the fibers and pulls them into somewhat parallel form. The thin web of fibers formed then passes through a funnel-shaped device that produces a ropelike strand of parallel fibers. Rollers elongate the strand, called a sliver, into a single more uniform strand that is given a small amount of twist and fed into large cans.

The Manufacturing Process

There are three major spinning processes: cotton, worsted or long-staple, or wool. Synthetic staple fibers can be made with any of these processes. Since more yarn is produced with the cotton process than the other two, its manufacture is described below.

Preparing the fibers

1 Fibers are shipped in bales, which are opened by hand or machine. Natural fibers may require cleaning, whereas synthetic fibers only require separating. The picker loosens and separates the lumps of fiber and also cleans the fiber if necessary. Blending of different staple fibers may be required for certain applications. Blending may be done during formation of the lap, during carding, or during drawing out. Quantities of each fiber are measured carefully and their proportions are consistently maintained.

Carding

2 The carding machine is set with hundreds of fine wires that separate the fibers and pull them into somewhat parallel form. A thin web of fiber is formed, and as it moves along, it passes through a funnel-shaped device that produces a ropelike strand of parallel fibers. Blending can take place by joining laps of different fibers.

Combing

3 When a smoother, finer yarn is required, fibers are subjected to a further paralleling method. A comblike device arranges fibers into parallel form, with short fibers falling out of the strand.

Drawing out

4 After carding or combing, the fiber mass is referred to as the sliver. Several slivers are combined before this process. A series of rollers rotating at different rates of speed elongate the sliver into a single more uniform strand that is given a small amount of twist and fed into large cans. Carded slivers are drawn twice after carding. Combed slivers are drawn once before combing and twice more after combing.

Twisting

5 The sliver is fed through a machine called the roving frame, where the strands of fiber are further elongated and given additional twist. These strands are called the roving.

Spinning

6 The predominant commercial systems of yarn formation are ring spinning and open-end spinning. In ring spinning, the roving is fed from the spool through rollers. These rollers elongate the roving, which passes through the eyelet, moving down

The sliver is fed through a machine called the roving frame, where the strands of fiber are further elongated and given additional twist. The predominant commercial systems of yarn formation are ring spinning and open-end spinning. Open-end spinning omits the roving step. and through the traveler. The traveler moves freely around the stationary ring at 4,000 to 12,000 revolutions per minute. The spindle turns the bobbin at a constant speed. This turning of the bobbin and the movement of the traveler twists and winds the yarn in one operation.

7 Open-end spinning omits the roving step. Instead, a sliver of fibers is fed into the spinner by a stream of air. The sliver is delivered to a rotary beater that separates the fibers into a thin stream that is carried into the rotor by a current of air through a tube or duct and is deposited in a V-shaped groove along the sides of the rotor. As the rotor turns, twist is produced. A constant stream of new fibers

enters the rotor, is distributed in the groove, and is removed at the end of the formed yarn.

Quality Control
Automation has made achieving quality easier, with electronics controlling operations, temperatures, speeds, twists, and efficiency. The American Society for Testing of Materials has also established standardized methods for determining such properties as drawforce, bulk, and shrinkage.

The Future
Spinning systems and yarn manufacturing machinery will continue to become more automated and will be integrated as part of a manufacturing unit rather than as a separate process. Spinning machines have already been developed that combine carding and drawing functions. Production rates will increase by orders of magnitude as machines become available with even more spindles. Robot-controlled equipment will become standard. Domestic yarn producers will continue to be threatened by competition from Asian countries, as these countries continue to buy the latest textile machinery technology. Higher domestic material prices will not help, since the cost of the raw material can represent up to 73% of the total cost of producing the yarn. U.S. yarn producers will continue to form alliances with their customers and customers' customers to remain competitive. The textile industry is also forming unique partnerships. The American Textile Partnership is a collaborative research and development program among industry, government, and academia aimed at strengthening the competitiveness of the U.S. industry. Another continuing challenge for the industry will be compliance with stricter environmental regulations. Recycling is already an issue and processes are under development to manufacture yarn from scrap material, including denim. Yarn producers will have to incorporate pollution prevention measures to meet the air and

water quality restrictions. Equipment manufactures will continue to play an important role in this endeavor. Genetic engineering will become more widely used for developing fibers with unique properties. Researchers have developed genetically-altered cotton plants, whose fibers are especially good at retaining warmth. Each fiber is a blend of normal cotton and small amounts of a natural plastic called polyhydroxybutyrate. It is predicted that dye-binding properties and greater stability will be possible with new fibers in the next generation. New synthetic fibers will also be developed that combine the best qualities of two different polymers. Some of these fibers will be produced through a chemical process, whereas others will be generated biologically by using yeast, bacteria, or fungi.

Where to Learn More

Books
Needles, H. L. Textile Fibers, Dyes, Finishes, and Processes. 1986.

Periodicals
Clune, Ray. "AYSA head exhorts yarn spinners to take more proactive stance." Daily News Record, May 8, 1996, p. 9. Isaacs, McAllister. "Texturing gets automation as TYAA celebrates 20." Textile World, May 1992, p. 54. "Long-staple processing moves to cut costs." Textile World, September 1992, p. 42. Weiss, Rick. "Molecular biologists grow gene-altered cotton plants." Washington Post, November 12, 1996. Tortora, Phyllis G. "Making Fibers into Yarns." Understanding Textiles. Macmillan Publishing Company, 1987.

Other

American Textile Manufacturers Institute, http://www.atmi.org Cotton Incorporated, 4605 Creedmoor Road, Raleigh, North Carolina 27612, tel: 919/782-6330, fax: 919/881-9874, http://www.cottoninc.com Current Industrial Reports, MA22FYarn Production. 1995. Department of Commerce, Bureau of Census. http://www.census.gov Laurel M. Sheppard

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