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VOL. 20 ISSUE 35 JULY 10-16, 2013 THEWEEKENDER.COM
NEPAS No. 1 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT FREE WEEKLY
MORE THAN 172,000 READERS WEEKLY*
weekender
BREAKER BREWING
GOES FROM HOBBY
TO BUSINESS, P. 32
INTERVIEWSWITH
ROB ZOMBIE,
HAWTHORNE HEIGHTS,
AND MORE, P. 28-30
METAL OR PUNK? YOU DECIDE!
VS.
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Contributors
Ralphie Aversa, Justin Brown, Kait Burrier, Caeriel Crestin, Pete Croatto, Nick Delorenzo, TimHlivia, Melissa Highes,
Michael Irwin, Amy Longsdorf, Matt Morgis, Ryan OMalley, Kacy Muir, Jason Riedmiller, Erin Rovin, Ned Russin,
Chuck Shepherd, Jen Stevens, Alan K. Stout, Mike Sullivan, Bill Thomas, Mark Uricheck, Robbie Vanderveken, Noelle Vetrosky,
Bobby Walsh, Derek Warren
Interns
Holly Dastalfo, Bill Rigotti
Address 90 E. Market St., Wilkes-Barre, PA18703
Fax 570.831.7375
E-mail Weekender@theweekender.com
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For distribution problems call 570.829.5000 To suggest a newlocation call 570.831.7349 To place a classied ad call 570.829.7130
Editorial policy
The Weekender is published weekly fromofces at 90 E. Market St., Wilkes-Barre, PA18703.
The opinions of independent contributors of the Weekender do not necessarily refect those of the editor or staf.
Rating system
WWWWW= superb WWWW= excellent WWW= good WW= average W= listenable/watchable
* Scarborough Research
John Popko
General Manager 570.831.7349
jpopko@theweekender.com
Punk.
Kieran Inglis
Media Consultant 570.831.7321
kinglis@theweekender.com
Punk.
Amanda Dittmar
Graphic Designer 570.970.7401
adittmar@theweekender.com
Hands down punk.
Rich Howells
Editor 570.831.7322
rhowells@theweekender.com
Ive always had a bit of both in
me, but Im more into metal
than anything else..
Sara Pokorny
StaWriter 570.829.7132
spokorny@theweekender.com
It might be the 12-year-old
skateboarder in me, but
Im going to go with punk.
Which genre of
music do you
prefer, punk or
metal?
Tell @wkdr
if you prefer
punk or
metal music. social
Charlene deGuzman @charstarlene
Online comment
of the week.
Scrolling through text messages is
the new shoebox of love letters.
The Weekender has 12,267
Facebook fans. Find us now at
Facebook.com/theweekender
My two favorite bands are Tool and Bad Religion, so this weeks staff
question has me a bit torn.
I love both metal and punk music, so this weeks cover story on the
Mayhem Festival and Warped Tour (pages 28-30) was a lot of fun to
put together. I interviewed Rob Zombie, Job for a Cowboy, Hawthorne
Heights, and Motion City Soundtrack, and while they each represent dif-
ferent genres and listeners, one thing connects them all.
Not one member of these bands t in in that mainstreamsense of the
term. They offer an alternative sound, along with an alternative perspec-
tive, from the norm, and they have millions of fans as a result. With
that comes a sense of community amongst those audiences, which is why
festivals like these are so important they gather these people together so
that they know that theyre not alone, that they belong somewhere.
Yes, these festivals are backed by big sponsors and corporations, but
at the end of the day, the music shines through all that. Even though our
cover implies they are versus each other, its really all in good fun. Were
all on the same side, and we all belong somewhere.
-Rich Howells, Weekender Editor
letter fromthe editor
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do you get when you build a series on the plot of teenagers killing each other live on TV? Well, an
awesome little trilogy we call the Hunger Games, but also a parody that pokes fun at all the Suzanne
Collins series has to offer.
The Hungry Hungry Games, a live stage comedy, is coming to the F.M. Kirby Center on Oct. 4.
Fan-favorite scenes will be spoofed, bringing comedy from director and co-writer Jim Millan, who
has worked with sketch comedy show The Kids in the Hall and recent Kirby performance Spank!
The Fifty Shades Parody.
There are teens hunting each other with bows and arrows, Millan says, but here you get to see
the tributes duke it out with a war of rhymes during the epic rap battle.
Tickets go on sale July 12 at 10 a.m. and can be purchased at kirbycenter.org, 570.826.1100, or the
Kirby Center Box Ofce. A Kirby member pre-sale begins today at 10 a.m.
will you be able to catch at the 9th Annual Scranton Jazz Festival and Jazz Walk?
A plethora of performers, including Freddy Cole (brother of Nat King Cole), Grammy Award-
winning Dave Samuels and The Organik Vibe Trio with saxophonist Joel Frahm, guitar icon Vic Juris
with Jay Anderson and Adam Nussbaum, and the Keystone College Jazz Institute Students Combos,
to name a few.
The festival will take place Aug. 2-4 at the historic Radisson Lackawanna Station Hotel (700
Lackawanna Ave., Scranton).
The rst night of jazz will be free, with Saturday nights advance tickets being $15 and $20 at the
door, and Sundays advance tickets being $20, and $25 at the door.
Tickets are available at all Joe Nardone Gallery of Sound locations, by calling 570.487.9354., or by
e-mailing hrunco@yahoo.com. For more information, visit scrantonjazzfestival.org.
can you paddle under the light of a full moon? At the 52-acre Lake Lacawac in Lake Ariel.
The Delaware Highlands Conservancy and Lacawac Sanctuary have just announced two moonlight
paddles on July 19 and Aug. 23, from 7-10 p.m.
Rowboats and canoes, paddles, and life jackets will be provided. Only sanctuary boats are permitted
on the lake due to the delicate balance of Lake Lacawacs ecosystem.
The program is free, but space is limited and reservations are required. To reserve a spot, call
570.689.9494 or send an email to joann@lacawac.org.
R E V I E W
There are teens hunting each other with bows and
arrows, but here you get to see the tributes duke it out
with a war of rhymes during the epic rap battle. writer
Jim Millan
Brad Patton
FromThe Times Leader
Kid Rock and his cohorts
are promising the Best Night
Ever for 20 bucks this sum-
mer, and while last Saturdays
concert at the Toyota Pavilion
at Montage Mountain may not
have lived up to such a lofty
goal, it still provided lots of
bang for the buck and was one
of the most exciting shows to
hit the mountain in a long, long
time.
The more than three hours of
music got started around 6:45
p.m. with a 30-minute set by
Uncle Kracker, Kid Rocks pro-
tg and former DJ. The man
born Matthew Shafer sang all
of his hits, such as Follow Me
and Smile, plus a new one
called Blue Skies from his lat-
est album, Midnight Special.
His blend of rock, R&B, rap
and country sort of like his
one-time boss, but with less
edge was pleasant enough,
but his version of When
The Sun Goes Down notice-
ably lacked Kenny Chesney
(Kracker was the featured art-
ist on Chesneys No. 1 song
from 2004) and his big remake
of Drift Away was a lot less
soulful without the late, great
Dobie Gray.
Up next was Kool & The
Gang, the funky hit makers
from the 1970s and 1980s.
While it may seem a bit incon-
gruous that the R&B legends
are on the same bill with Kid
Rock, the 10-piece band did a
ne job in whipping the crowd
into a frenzy. Beginning with
Fresh, Kool and company
were on from the moment they
hit the stage and kept getting
better as the 55-minute set
continued, inevitably ending
with a super-charged version of
Celebration.
The three-song set of
70s favorites Funky
Stuff, Jungle Boogie and
Hollywood Swinging tore
up the middle part of the show,
highlighting the Gangs crack
three-piece horn section. The
band then followed with three
tunes from its 80s heyday
Ladies Night (complete
with a tasty bass solo from
original member Robert Kool
Bell), Get Down On It and
Celebration to really get the
party swinging.
After a video countdown of
15 minutes and a prayer from
behind a huge banner that
turned a $20 bill into a nifty
piece of Kid Rock swag, the
now 42-year-old Kid, decked
out in a red T-shirt, a black
hat with a red band, and dark
shades, nally took the stage
around 9:15.
Storming out with Devil
Without a Cause, the title
track of his 11-times platinum
1998 album that introduced the
man to the masses, the Kid was
hot from the get-go.
Before his nal numbers, Kid
Rock thanked his tour sponsors
Harley Davidson and Jim Beam
for helping him keep the costs
low; every seat being sold for
$20 no doubt helps the size of
the crowd.
But he sounded humble
when he said, No matter what
you paid to get in here, I want
to thank you for spending your
hard-earned money to come
see us play.
W
Pretty close to the
Best Night Ever
Photo by Amanda Hrycyna
Kid Rock knows how to put on a
crowd-pleasing show.
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index
July 10-July 16, 2013
COVERSTORY
Mayhem vs. Warped 28-30
LISTINGS
The W 5
Concerts 15
Speak and See 21
Live Entertainment 22
Agenda 33, 36
MUSIC
Kid Rock 5, 26
Mac Miller 7
Breaking Down the Walls 10
Album review 14
Charts 14
Lurrie Bell 17
Steve Martin 18, 19
STAGE &SCREEN
Movie review 25
Ralphie Report 25
Starstruck 52
ARTS
Novel Approach 21
Book Club 52
LIFESTYLE
NEPA Fitness Challenge 31
Securely Fashioned 39
Green Piece 39
Show Us Some Skin 41
Single in Scranton 42
Man 53
Model 54
HUMOR&FUN
Breaker Brewing Company 32
Id Tap That 32
Puzzle 33
News of the Weird 38
Sorry Mom & Dad 38
Girl Talk 42
Sign Language 44
Pet of the Week 53
GAMES &TECH
Get Your Game On 40
Motorhead 40
ONTHE COVER
Design and photo by Amanda Dittmar
Volume 20 Issue 35
31 FEARSOME FOURSOME
See how four locals fared after the 16-week fitness challenge at World Class Boxing
ONLINE Read extended interviews with Rob Zombie and more
17 BELLS BLUES
Lurrie Bell headlines the 16th Annual Briggs Farm Blues Festival
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Kait Burrier
Weekender Correspondent
Mac Miller received
my call with a sleepy yet
friendly Hi!
The kids been busy.
Millers second studio
album, Watching Movies
with the Sound Off,
was recently released
by Pittsburghs own
Rostrum Records, a label
that represents Millers
friend and fellow burgh
rapper, Wiz Khalifa.
Miller wrapped the rst
season of his MTV reali-
ty show, Mac Miller and
the Most Dope Family,
chronicling L.A. life with
his hometown besties,
and just signed on for a
second season of domes-
tic antics.
Hes been on the
road with his Space
Migration tour since
June, hitting up nearly
40 cities across North
America with his crew
of openers including
Vince Staples, Chance
the Rapper, and The
Internet with a few dates
booked with Meek Mill,
Action Bronson, and Odd
Futures Earl Sweatshirt.
Mac and I chatted before
his show in Myrtle Beach,
S.C.
THE WEEKENDER:
Hows the tour been
going?
MAC MILLER: Its
been amazing, it really
has. Its been very, very
,very, very fun I think I
have the best tour of the
summer, just with all the
acts that are with us.
W: Is there anything
that youre working on
now, any collaborations
that we should know
about?
MM: Everyone on tour
has been kind of leaning
towards making music
together, but really weve
just been pushing this
album.
W: I saw an MTV seg-
ment where you talk
about the value of kids
going to a CD shop or
record shop, saving
up money, and going
through the whole pro-
cess of getting a physi-
cal album.
MM: Yeah.
W: Youre playing at
the Sherman Theater
and they have a great
record shop nearby
called Main Street
Juke Box (606 Main St
Stroudsburg). When
I lived in Pittsburgh,
I used to go to Jerrys
(2136 Murray Ave.,
Pittsburgh) Is there
any record shop that
you used to go to in
Pittsburgh?
MM: Jerrys Record
Store, you know, for sure.
And I used to go to The
Exchange (5858 Forbes
Ave., Pittsburgh) as well
when it was called The
Record Exchange.
W: Do you have a
favorite record shop in
the country?
MM: Jerrys.
W: Its so good!
MM: Hell yeah.
W: Whatre you listen-
ing to right now?
MM: Im listening to
this dude named Chance
the Rapper Have you
heard of him?
W: No. Whats he like?
MM: You should check
himout. Hes really tight
Theres a lot of music.
Right now Im on my
Radiohead. Ive just been
listening to Radiohead.
W: Their newer stuff
or the older stuff?
MM: Its fking In
Rainbows.
W: Did you hear
Atoms for Peace? Its
with Thom Yorke and
Flea from Red Hot Chili
Peppers.
MM: Not yet.
W: They just put
something out.
MM: Its crazy?
W: It is crazy! Its
good, though. Anything
we should know about
the title of your album,
Watching Movies with
the Sound Off?
MM: I think it just kind
of deals with turning off
the sounds of the outside
world and just envision-
ing your own reality, cre-
ating your own reality.
W: Thats great. Do
you ever nd that you
have cinematic inspira-
tion?
MM: Yeah. A lot. A lot
of documentaries, a lot of
surreal-type movies and
stuff like that.
W: Do you ever
think youll bring
your music into a
movie like (Wu-Tang
Clans) RZA did with
The Man with the
Iron Fists?
MM: Hell yeah, Id
love to!
W: I was wondering
if you have anything
to say to young peo-
ple who are trying to
do what you did and
write their way up.
MM: I mean, I think
that you are going to
have people who are
going to tell you that
youre not good enough.
Youre going to come
across a lot of negative
energy Its the same
thing as sports, you
know? You got to prac-
tice your free throws.
You got to practice. You
got to keep writing,
you got to break down
any walls or barriers
that you might have for
yourself and just write
from a standpoint of
unlimited possibility.
W: When you write,
do you have a composi-
tion process? Do you get
the beat rst, or a single
line that you work from?
MM: It all depends. It
all depends on the song.
Everything is different.
W: In the song
S.D.S. you say, Im
no god. Kanye has
the line I am a god
and your new albums
dropped on the same
day - was there any cor-
relation there?
MM: No, no, no, no, no.
Its just more of a com-
ment on celebrity culture
and people looking up to
musicians and artists
W: Like idolizing?
MM: Exactly.
W: How do you feel
about your move from
Pittsburgh to L.A.?
MM: I love it. Love
L.A., man. L.A.s a good
place.
W: I saw that you have
a label: REMember.
MM: Yeah Its some-
thing that Ive started
with one of my best
friends back home, trying
to give people I grew up
with something to believe
into be heard.
W: So its a way to get
voices out there that
wouldnt be out there?
MM: Yeah, exactly.
W: Do you have any-
thing coming out soon
on that label?
MM: Yeah, theres an
artist named Vinny Radio.
W: Is there anything
else youd want me to
put out there for people
who want to catch you
on your tour?
MM: Yeah, to check
us out andalso make
sure to check out my new
album.
W: Sounds good.
MM: Hey, and say
nice things about me.
(Laughs)
W: Say nice things
about you? Well, I got
that covered. (Laughs)
MM: Alright, thats
cool.
W
Mac Miller talks record stores, writing, and moving to L.A.
Courtesy Photo
Rising star Mac Miller will be performing at the Sherman Theater with his entourage on July 11.
MORE INFO
MaC MilleR, ChanCe The RaPPeR, VinCe
sTaPles, andThe inTeRneT: July 11, 8
P.M., sheRManTheaTeR (524 Main sT.,
sTRoudsbuRg). $30.
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One of Northeast Pennsylvanias longest run-
ning and hardest working bands is back on
the grind. Nanticokes Strength For A Reason
recently released a new EP on Fast Break
Records, entitled Through Cold Eyes, that
features six brand new songs as well as four live
songs, and the group just got back from a tour
throughout Europe. Their new musical offer-
ing is the rst release since 2009s Burden of
Hope.
For a band that has been going strong since
1997, it seems that they are the hardcore ener-
gizer bunny. SFARs new EP picks up right
where they left offhard hitting music that is
only surpassed by the energy of vocalist Karl
Kivler.
Now not only is Strength For A Reason jet-
setting across Europe and releasing new music,
they also have a string of shows coming up this
month. The group plays July 12 in Philadelphia
with Earth Crisis at The Underground Arts;
July 13 in Cleveland, Ohio with Merauder; July
20 in Bucksport, Maine with Slapshot; July 21
in Brooklyn, N.Y. with Wisdom in Chains; and
July 27 in East Greenwich, R.I. with Murphys
Law, as well as appearing at This Is Hardcore
Fest in Philadelphia in August with other local
acts like Cold World and Stick Together. While
Strength For A Reason spreads the NEPA hard-
core reality far and wide, there are even more
shows happening around their home town. On
July 10 Daylight, Sainthood Reps, Haling,
and Noise Pet will be all playing at West Side
Park in Nanticoke. This is Daylights rst local
appearance since the release of their critically
acclaimed debut LP Jar on Run For Cover
Records. Daylight is a band that shows incred-
ible growth with each release, and Jar is the
pinnacle of years of hard work. Playing a style
of music reminiscent to the bands of the early
to mid 1990s with fuzzed-out guitars and con-
fessional, personal lyrics, Daylight will be sure
to please all fans old and new.
Sainthood Reps just got off tour with locals
Tigers Jaw and are making their way from Long
Island, N.Y., to play a much anticipated one-off
show. Sainthood draws comparisons to past
and present Long Island bands, but put their
own unique spin on it. Sainthood Reps recently
signed to No Sleep Records and will be releas-
ing a new record in the fall.
Haling, from Scranton, is a band that I
have written about in the past, but I am always
excited to write about them again and again.
They are a band that seems to be already wise
beyond their years and write interesting songs.
Rounding out the show is a new band called
Noise Pet. This is a new project that I have
been working on with Hannah Roman for close
to a year, but we are only playing our rst show
now. The show starts at 6 p.m. and is $10.
It seems that this year music is following
the weather: in a current state of constant and
resilient heat, at least the shows and new music
following.
W
Area band Strength For A Reason may have been on the music scene since 1997, but their newest collection of songs
is fresh as ever.
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NEW HOURS. OPEN FOR LUNCH THURS.-SUN. at NOON, MON.-WED. 4-CLOSE
PARKING IN REAR DO NOT PARK ACROSS STREET THEY WILL TOW!
Happy Hour!
HAPPY HOUR: SUN. 6-8 MON.-THURS. 9-11
FRI. 5:30-7:30 SAT. 5-7 w/1/2 OFF APPS!
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TUXEDO
MOUSE
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SUNDAY $5 FROZEN SLUSHY DRINKS 12-5
$1.50 COORS LIGHT
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ROX 52
BAR & GRILLE
52 E. Main St., Plymouth 779-7876
www.rox52bar.com Find us on Facebook
KITCHEN
OPEN TIL
MIDNIGHT
LocaL music with titLe Fights
Ned Russin | Special to the Weekender
Summer showseason is a hot one
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Presents
weekender
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8. Icona Pop: I Love It
7. Zedd/Foxes: Clarity
6. Maroon5: Love Somebody
5. Imagine Dragons: Radioactive
4. Selena Gomez: Come andGet It
3. Robin Thicke/Pharrell Williams/T.I.:
BlurredLines
2. Macklemore/Ryan Lewis: Cant Hold
Us
1. Daft Punk/Pharrell Williams: Get
Lucky
1. Dirty Heads: 1. Daft Punk/Pharrell
Williams: Get Lucky
1. Dirty Heads: CabinBy The Sea
2. J. Cole: BornSinner
3. Wale: Gifted
4. Black Sabbath: 13
5. Kayne West: Yeezus
6. Queensryche: Queensryche
7. Alice In Chains: Devil Put The
Dinosaurs Here
8. Transplants: InAWarzone
9. Florida Georgia Line: Heres To The
GoodTimes
10. AmonAmarth: DecieverOf TheGods
Top 8 at 8 with Ralphie Aversa
Top 10 Albums at Gallery of Sound
Rating
WWWV
Nephew
Dead Nephew
Collaborative local music is Dead on
Independent music scenes in small geographic regions are often incestuous, with
many groups sharing members and local musicians participating in a number of
seemingly disparate projects. The NEPA music scene is no different, and the result
of all that artistic inbreeding can be pretty sweet indeed.
Case in point: Dead Nephew. This project is the brainchild of ex-Tambourine
Murder Scene member and occasional Dirt Vultures contributor Zach Jones, col-
laborating with fellow former TMS members Ed Sromoski and Eddie McGuire, as
well as the dream weaving duo behind Mock Sun, Jami Kali and Mark Wohl. Jones
and Sromoski, likewise, have contributed to Mock Sun releases in the past.
Interestingly, the music on Nephew, a ve-track offering available on Dead
Nephews Bandcamp page for whatever price you feel like paying, doesnt quite
sound like any of the aforementioned groups, but rather stands as its own swagger-
ing, fuzz-drenched sonic juggernaut. Following the ambient noise of intro Dead,
the album bursts forth like a locomotive behemoth, bearing down on you with a
potent combo-platter of Southern-fried riffage and grungy Layne Staley-if-he-was-a-
chick vocal stylings (courtesy of Kali).
Cupcake Mountain delivers more of
the same: heavy, dinosaur-steps-in-the-
forest stoner rock with a cocky hillbilly
edge, but also an ethereal, space-rock
vibe that hints at a deeper strange-
ness beneath that bluster. Said strange-
ness is let off the chain entirely on the
seven-minute head-trip that is Hawaii/
Negation/Hex, which twists and con-
torts in the heart of a brain cell-detonat-
ing wormhole full of chaotic noise-rock
dissonance and drug-fuelled decadence.
Finally, album-closer Dreamboat
goes in for the kill, luring listeners in
with fragile acoustic strumming before
them utterly into a jet-black void of
ghostly, wailing feedback. Its enough to
leave you with bloodshot eyes, lungs full of smoke, and a hole-in-the-soul hankering
for more.
Heres hoping theres more Dead Nephew in its collaborators futures. And in ours.
-Bill Thomas, Weekender Correspondent
W
The greatness of Grail
The Internet is like the Wild Wild West,
Jay-Z said in his promotional video for his
latest release, Magna Carta Holy Grail
an album he gave away to Samsung cell
phone users three days early.
Although the marketing strategy has been
criticized (Samsung actually paid for a mil-
lion copies; they werent free), and the RIAA
tried to change the rules (the album went
platinumthe day it was released), the record
itself is nothing shy of great.
The Jay-Z that emerges from this record
is calm, relaxed, and he comes with friends.
Magna Carta features guest appearances
from A-list celebrities like Beyonce, Justin
Timberlake, and Rick Ross. Timbaland is
credited with production on 11 of the 16
tracks.
Of course, Jay is toointellectually restless
to give us an album without some surpris-
ing twists. He quotes Nirvana, R.E.M. and
Billie Holiday and takes potshots at Miley
Cyrus, Scott Boras and Harry Belafonte.
Oceans opens with a lovely melody
from Frank Ocean, who ponders sitting on
a yacht docked off the Ivory Coast, spilling
champagne into the same waters that once
bore the slave ships carryinghis imprisoned
a The Wu-Tang-infused Heaven seems
poised to pose some intriguing eschatologi-
cal questions, but once hes asked them, Jay
simply shrugs them off, rapping: Question
religion, question it all/Question existence
until them questions is solved.
Midway through Magna Carta,
Queens rapper Nas delivers a quick verse
on BBC. Theres always a burst of excite-
ment when these two appear together, two
former rivals who still carry on from 90s
hip-hop. Nas has always taken a different
approach: testing himself even at the risk
of falling at. Rap counterpart Kanye West,
for as many faults as hes had, has always
tested himself and his musical boundaries
in similar ways to Nas, and in ways Jay has
rarely dared.
Theres no reason to think Jay isnt capa-
ble of aging just as gracefully has some of
his counterparts, but to do so will require
a dose of self-reection, vulnerability and
a willingness to fail. If Magna Carta Holy
Grail is any indication, Jay-Z still has a lot
of growing up to do.
-Matt Morgis, Weekender Correspondent
OlivaraisesthebarwithCurtain
Jon Oliva spent nearly three decades at
the cutting edge of progressive metal as
the vocalist and lifeblood for Savatage,
the band he formed, championed, and
later morphed into a multi-million-dollar
fairytale with Trans-Siberian Orchestra,
yet hes never released a solo album until
now. Oliva takes a careers worth of musi-
cal ideals, inuences, and personal atone-
ment and smatters it against the canvas to
produce a dynamically personal musical
statement for his solo debut.Noteworthy to
this project is that Oliva used the remain-
ing music his brother Criss had left over.
Criss Oliva, the legendary Savatage guitar-
ist, who had many of his riffs recycled and
immortalized in TSOsongs, had his career
cut short by a fatal trafc accident back in
1993. Jon Oliva scoured the archives Criss
left behind to compile tracks like Father
Time, which reveals a bouncy, groove-
oriented nod to classic R&B, then
segues into brilliantly harmonized
guitar leads and Hammond organ
that is straight out of an Emerson,
Lake and Palmer playbook. Tracks like
Soul Chaser are more reminiscent of
Jons classic Savatage work, with caus-
tic, minor-key guitar passages and
rhythmic shifts not to mention Jons
patented evil-toothed vocal snarl.
Tracks like Armageddon are
unsettlingly dark, more akin to Olivas
Trans-Siberian Orchestra contribu-
tions; the track rides a militaristic,
marching-type seesaw while howling,
bomb effects, and otherworldly phantom
instrumentationseems ripe for a conjuring,
while Oliva scowls out lyrical imagery like
an arrowin the brain, showing us our real-
ity. Musical curve balls are thrown around
every corner, however, like on Cant Get
Away, a Nashville-ripped soul ballad laced
with wry Oliva attitude. Jon, ripping open
the contents of a long-bottled heart, spills,
I never could quite nd the time to tell
you, Im still holding on to you.
Equal parts the overblown, 1970s the-
atric-rock spectacle of Styxs The Grand
Illusion, infused with prototype English
hard-prog a la Wishbone Ash/Robin
Trower, with the underlying poetic breath
of a true storyteller, Raise the Curtain
is Jon Oliva leaving no doubt as to what
drives him.
- Mark Uricheck, Weekender
Correspondent
W
Tuctu Raise the Curtain
Oliva
Rating
WWWWV
HMagna Carta Holy Grail
Jay-Z
Rating
WWWV
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16TH ANNUAL BRIGGS FARM
BLUESFEST
(88 Old Berwick Hwy.,
Nescopeck)
570.379.3342, briggsfarm.com
Featuring Lurrie Bell, more:
July 12-13, $28-$90
THE COOPERAGE PROJECT
(1030 Main St., Honesdale)
570.253.2020, thecooperagepro-
ject.org
(Donations accepted and appreci-
ated at the door at all events.)
Open Mic Night: July 17, 7:30-
10 p.m.
Dance Journey: July 18, 7:15-
9 p.m. $7 suggested donation.
Donation-based event, contributions
are appreciated.
DJ Dance Party: July 20, 9 p.m.-
midnight. $5 suggested donation.
F.M. KIRBY CENTER
(71 Public Square, Wilkes-Barre)
570.826.1100, kirbycenter.org
Jason Isbell: Aug. 9, 8 p.m. $25;
$50, VIP.
Theresa Caputo of Long Island
Medium: Aug. 18, 3 p.m. $39.75.
The Onion Live!: Oct. 24, 7:30
p.m. $19, $34.
Merle Haggard: Nov. 2, 8 p.m.
$40-$99.
YAMATO: The Drummers of
Japan: Nov. 20, 7:30 p.m. $25, $35.
MAUCH CHUNK OPERA
HOUSE
(14 W. Broadway, Jim Thorpe)
570.325.0249, mauchchunkopera-
house.com
The New Riders of the Purple
Sage: July 12, 8:30 p.m., $28
Kashmir: The Ultimate Led
Zeppelin Show: July 13, 8 p.m.
Incendio: July 20, 8 p.m., $23
Benny & The Jets: July 26, 8
p.m. $24
The Vagabond Opera: July 27,
8 p.m., $22
Solas: Sep. 6, 8 p.m., $25
MOHEGAN SUN ARENA
(255 Highland Park Blvd., Wilkes-
Barre)
800.745.3000, mohegansunare-
napa.com
Cirque Musica: Sept. 22, 7 p.m.
$25-$65.
MOUNT AIRY CASINO
RESORT
(44 Woodland Rd., Mount
Pocono)
877.682.4791, mountairycasino.
com
Kansas: Aug. 11, 7 p.m., $25-
$45
The Stylistics: Oct. 19, 8 p.m.,
$45
Aaron Lewis: Nov. 9, p p.m., $45-
$65
PENNS PEAK
(325 Maury Rd., Jim Thorpe)
866.605.7325, pennspeak.com
7 Bridges: July 12, 8 p.m., $22
TESLA: June 28, 8 p.m.
Arrival, the music of ABBA: July
14, 8 p.m.
Old Crow Medicine Show: July
25, 8 p.m.
Ted Nugent: Aug. 14 8 p.m.
Glenn Miller Orchestra: Sept.
17-19, 1 p.m.
Josh Turner: Sept. 26, 8 p.m.
The Swing Dolls: Tribute to
Andrews Sisters and McGuire Sisters:
Oct. 1-3, 1 p.m.
King Henry and the Showmen:
Oct. 15-17, 12 p.m.
Real Diamond: Neil Diamond
Tribute: Oct. 23-24, 1 p.m.
Gordon Lightfoot: Oct. 26, 8
p.m.
America: Nov. 2, 8 p.m.
PENNSYLVANIA BLUES
FESTIVAL
(Blue Mountain Ski Area,
Palmerton)
610.826.7700, skibluemt.com
Featuring Robert Randolph &
The Family Band, more: July 26-28,
$30-$449
The Ramada
(820 Northern Boulevard Road,
Clarks Summit. 570.586.2730.)
Comedians Doug Karpf, Johnny
V and Father Paul: July 26, doors 7
p.m., show at 8:30. $15, advance; $18,
at the door.
RIVER STREET JAZZ CAFE
(667 N. River St., Plains)
570.822.2992, riverstreetjazzcafe.
com5
The Kinsey Report: July 11, 10
p.m. $10
Subnotics: July 12, 8 p.m.,
$7-$10
The Aristocrats: July 31, 8 p.m.,
$20
Settlers Inn
(4 Main Ave., Hawley.
570.226.2993)
Jazz on the Deck Series, 6-9 p.m.
July 10: Robert Kopec Quartet
July 17: Thos Shipley Trio
July 24: Kelley Suttenfeld Trio
with Tony Romano & Matt Aronoff
July 31: Compass Jazz Quartet
Aug. 7: Liberto Trio featuring
Ralph Liberto, Stephen Faubel, Bob
Wilson and Steve Kurilla
Aug. 14: Nick Niles
Aug. 21: Vibraphonist Stefan
Bauer and special guest from NYC
Aug. 23: New Orleans Jazz BBQ
- Wally Lake Fest Opening Party
Aug. 28: Judi Silvano and her
Quartet
SHERMAN THEATER
(524 Main St., Stroudsburg)
570.420.2808, shermantheater.
com
Mac Miller: July 11, 8 p.m.,
$27.50
Dave Mason: July 18, 8 p.m.,
$29.50-$39.50
Christian Porter: July 19, 8 p.m.,
$15-$30
Electric Hot Tuna: July 25, 8
p.m.
We the Kings: Aug. 14, 6:30 p.m.,
$20
TOYOTA PAVILION AT
MONTAGE MOUNTAIN
1000 Montage Mountain Road,
Scranton
Rockstar Energy Drink Mayhem
Festival: July 13. $31.50-$60.50
Vans Warped Tour: July 16. $35.
Americas Most Wanted II Tour
featuring Lil Wayne: July 21. $25-
$89.75.
Rockstar Energy Drink Uproar
Festival: Aug. 9, 8 p.m.
Peach Music Festival: Aug. 15.
$35.
Jason Aldean: Aug. 25. $31.50-
$61.25.
Honda Civic Tour featuring
Maroon 5 and Kelly Clarkson: Sept.
1. $30-$120.
PHILADELPHIA
ELECTRIC FACTORY
(3421 Willow St., Philadelphia)
215.LOVE.222, electricfactory.info
Smash Mouth / Sugar Ray / Gin
Blossoms / Vertical Horizon / Fastball:
Aug. 3, 7 p.m.
This is Hardcore: GWAR / Kid
Dynamite / Modern Life Is War / 7
Seconds: Aug. 8-11.
City and Colour: Sep. 18, 8 p.m.
KESWICK THEATRE
(291 North Keswick Ave.,
Glenside)
215.572.7650, keswicktheatre.com
Buddy Guy: July 30, 7:30 p.m.
Ten Years After / Canned Heat /
Edgar Winter Band / Rick Derringer /
Pat Travers: Aug. 14, 8 p.m.
Adam Ant and The Good, The
Mad, and The Lovely Posse: Aug. 15,
8 p.m.
Sinbad: Sep. 14, 9 p.m.
Steve Hackett: Genesis
Revisited: Oct. 11-12, 8 p.m.
The Piano Guys: Oct 18, 8 p.m.
The Fab Faux: Oct. 19, 8 p.m.
Steven Wright: Nov. 3, 8 p.m.
NORTH STAR BAR
27th & Poplar St, Philadelphia
Phone: 215.684.0808
Dick Dale: July 22, 8 p.m.
The Aristocrats / Sylvana Joyce /
The Moment: Aug. 2, 9 p.m.
June 13: Frankmusik with spe-
cial guests
June 15: Rosco Bandana
June 17: The Naked Sun
June 21: Song Dogs with
Stallions, Grip of the Gods
Sept. 11: Pere Ubu
TOWER THEATER
(19 South 69th St., Upper Darby)
610.352.2887, tower-theatre.com
The Specials: July 13, 8 p.m.
TROCADERO THEATRE
(1003 Arch St., Philadelphia)
215.336.2000, thetroc.com
LucIano: July 20, 9 p.m.
The Mission UK: Sept. 4, 8 p.m.
Kamelot / Delain / Exlipse: Sep.
5, 8 p.m.
SUSQUEHANNA BANK
CENTER
(1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.)
609.365.1300, livenation.com/ven-
ues/14115
Vans Warped Tour: July 12, 12
p.m.
Victoria Justice: July 16, 8 p.m.
Train: July 24, 8 p.m.
Miranda Lambert / Dierks
Bently: July 26, 8 p.m.
The Lumineers: July 27, 8 p.m.
Blake Shelton: Aug. 10, 8 p.m.
Jason Aldean: Aug. 24, 8 p.m.
Keith Urban / Dustin Lynch /
Little Big Town: Sept. 14, 8 p.m.
WELLS FARGO CENTER
(3601 South Broad St.,
Philadelphia)
215.336.3600, wellsfargocenter-
philly.com
The Eagles: July 16, 7 p.m.
Justin Beiber: July 17, 7 p.m.
Beyonce: July 25, 8 p.m.
Muse: Sep. 9, 8 p.m.
Selena Gomez: Oct. 18, 8 p.m.
P!nk: Dec. 6, 8 p.m.
Rod Stewart: Dec. 11, 8 p.m.
ELSEWHERE IN PA
CROCODILE ROCK
(520 West Hamilton St, Allentown)
610.434.460, crocodilerockcafe.
com
Great White: Sep. 18, 7 p.m.
Bullet Boys: Sep. 15, 6 p.m.
GIANT CENTER
(950 Hersheypark Dr., Hershey)
717.534.3911, giantcenter.com
Selena Gomez: Oct. 22, 7 p.m.
The Fresh Beat Band: Dec. 4, 7
p.m.
HERSHEYPARK STADIUM
100 W. Hersheypark Dr., Hershey
717.534.3911, hersheyparksta-
dium.com
Dave Matthews Band: July 13,
7 p.m.
Victoria Justice / Big Time Rush:
July 19, 7 p.m.
Journey / Rascal Flatts: Aug. 1,
7 p.m.
Jay Z and Justin Timberlake:
Aug. 4, 7 p.m.
Jason Aldean: Aug. 10, 7 p.m.
Matchbox 20 / Goo Goo Dolls:
Aug. 14, 7 p.m.
SANDS BETHLEHEM EVENT
CENTER
(77 Sands Blvd., Bethlehem)
610.2977414, sandseventcenter.
com
Los Lobos / Los Lonely Boys /
Alejandro Escovedo: July 10, 7 p.m.
Slash: July 16, 7 p.m.
Tony Bennett: July 26, 8 p.m.
Bad Company: July 29, 8 p.m.
Godsmack: Aug. 7, 8 p.m.
The Wanted: Aug. 24, 8 p.m.
Hanson: Sept. 2, 6 p.m.
Sarah Brightman: Sept. 22, 8
p.m.
Steely Dan: Sep. 27, 7 p.m.
Celtic Thunder: Oct. 9, 8 p.m.
Diana Krall: Oct. 10, 8 p.m.
WHITAKER CENTER
(222 Market St., Harrisburg)
717.214.ARTS, whitakercenter.org
Hot Tuna Electric: July 26, 8
p.m.
Ana Popovic: Sep. 19, 8 p.m.
NEWYORK / NEWJERSEY
BEACON THEATRE
(2124 Broadway, New York, N.Y.)
212.465.6500, beacontheatre.com
Cindy Lauper: July 10, 8 p.m.
Alice Cooper: July 18, 8 p.m.
Tedeschi Trucks Band: Sep.
20-21, TIMES VARY
Joe Satriani: Sep. 26, 8 p.m.
An Evening with Ian Anderson:
Oct. 11, 8 p.m.
The Fab Faux: Oct. 26, 8 p.m.
Zappa Plays Zappa: Oct. 31, 8
p.m.
BETHEL WOODS CENTER
(200 Hurd Road, Bethel, N.Y.)
866.781.2922, bethelwoodscenter.
org
Victoria Justice: July 12, 7 p.m.
Natalie Merchant w/ The
Hudson Valley Philharmonic: July 20,
8 p.m.
The Eagles: July 25, 8 p.m.
Tim McGraw: July 26, 7 p.m.
Bad Company / Lynyrd Skynyrd:
July 27, 7 p.m.
George Thorogood & The
Destroyers / Buddy Guy: Aug. 8, 7
p.m.
Blake Shelton: Aug. 11, 7 p.m.
Cheech & Chong: Aug. 15, 7
p.m.
Yo-Yo Ma / Stuart Duncan /
Edgar Meyer / Chris Thile: Aug. 16,
8 p.m.
Zac Brown Band: Aug. 17, 7 p.m.
John Mayer: Aug. 20, 7 p.m.
Luke Bryan: Aug. 23, 7 p.m.
Kid Rock / ZZ Top: Sep. 6, 7 p.m.
Joan Osborne: Sept, 13, 8 p.m.
IRVING PLAZA
(17 Irving Place, New York, N.Y.)
212.777.6800, irvingplaza.com
Sly and Robbie: July 11, 7 p.m.
HollywoodUndead: July15, 6p.m.
The Psychedelic Furs: Aug. 3, 8p.m.
Cindy Lauper will perform at the Beacon Theater (2124 Broadway,
New York, N.Y.) tonight at 8 p.m. For more info or tickets, call
212.465.6500 or visit beacontheater.com.
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Quality is our tradition
111 North Main St. Wilkes-Barre PA 570.824.8747
tues 10-12:
.50 Bud Light drAftS
$1 SLiceS of PizzA
Wed 10-12:
$2 LoNg iSLANd
thurs 10-12:
$1.75 doM $2.75 iMP BtLS
$1 16oz drAftS & $1 SLiceS of PizzA
Fri 6-8:
1/2 Price everythiNg
10-12:
$3 PerSoNAL PitcherS,
WeLL MixerS & doM drAft
sat 10-12:
$1 ruM & cokeS & crANvodkAS
sun 8-9:
1/2 Price everythiNg
Mon 9-10:
1/2 off everythiNg
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July 16-21, 2013
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for A DAy!?!?
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to find out how!
SENUNAS
Bar &
Grill
133 N. Main St., W.-B. (Right across from Kings College)
KITCHEN OPEN MON.-SAT. 11AM-2PM/5PM-11PM
HAPPY HOUR SPECIALS
$2.00
$2.00
$3.00
$2.00
$2.25
$1.00
BUD LIGHT, LAGER,
MILLER LITE
CHERRY/GRAPE
TIC TAC BOMBS
JAGERBOMBS
MILLER, COORS LIGHT
BUD LIGHT OR LAGER
PINTS
TWISTED TEA, CORONA
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MILLER, COORS LIGHT
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EVERY THURS. 10-12
HAPPY
HOUR
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Thurs., Fri. &
Sat. 10-12
FRIDAY
5-7 &
10-12 P.M.
DAILY SPECIALS: MMiller Lite $2, 5-12 TBud Light, $2, 5-12 WBig Boy
Domestic Pitchers, $6 9-11 Th 8-10 Bud Light and Bud Light Lime Buckets $6
FCoors Light $2, 5-12 SMiller Lite, $2, 5-12
$2 LANDSHARK BOTTLES
WEDNESDAY
50 WINGS
SUMMER
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NOW CARRYING
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$4 LITs
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Fri, July 12
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Fri, July 12
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tueS, July 16
two oF a Kind
80007605
W
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Rich Howells
Weekender editor
Some of the most notable
blues musicians have come from
Chicago, but NEPA residents
wont have to travel that far to
see one its legends take the stage.
Lurrie Bell, son of the late
blues harmonica player Carey
Bell, will be headlining as well
as performing an acoustic set
at the 16th Annual Briggs Farm
Blues Festival on Saturday,
July 13 alongside The Kinsey
Report, Mac Arnold, and Terry
Harmonica Bean with The
Cornlickers.
Picking up the guitar at only
four years old, Bell is still pro-
lic at age 54, recently releasing
the album Blues in My Soul
with his band and producer Dick
Shurman. He talked with The
Weekender about the connection
between blues and gospel, how
he chooses his music, and what it
takes to be a true bluesman.
THE WEEKENDER: What
was it that made you rst try
the guitar?
LURRIE BELL: My father
Carey Bell played with Muddy
Waters, and they were at my
house a lot. One day when I was
about four, I decided to pick one
up.
W: Out of all the blues play-
ers you met as a kid, who was
the most inuential on you
and your work?
LB: Pianist Lovie Lee and my
cousin Eddie C. Campbell. They
really took me in and helped me
get going.
W: Anyone can pick up a gui-
tar, but what do you think it
takes to be a real blues player?
LB: Feeling and context.
W: Blues was considered the
devils music in some places
for a long time, so what made
you blend the blues with gos-
pel?
LB: When I was young, I went
down to Lisbon, Ala., to live with
my grandparents for a while, and
they encouraged me to play in the
church. I already knew the blues,
so I would sing to the Lord and
play blues with my guitar. Blues
and gospel have a lot in common.
W: How does Chicago blues
stand out from other types of
blues?
LB: The modern blues sound
originated in Chicago when
Muddy Waters had Little Walter
on harp and Otis Spann on piano,
second guitar. Ive always liked
that full sound.
W: You made a huge come-
back in the 90s with your
Delmark records. What was
the driving force there?
LB: I had to x a lot of things,
and Delmark was of great encour-
agement to me a lot of musician
friends as well.
W: How do you choose the
songs you cover and perform?
LB: I listen and if they move
me And some are just favorites.
Dick Shurman, who produced
the new album, brought me over
200 songs to listen to.
W: What inspires you
to write a song, and what
inspired the songs you wrote
on this current record?
LB: Its important to let people
into my life, whats on my mind
the song Blues in My Soul talks
about that. Everybody has their
own cross to bear. Blues is where
I go to nd my peace.
W: What is your writing pro-
cess like?
LB: I write my thoughts down
as lyrics and then play with them
in my mind and with my guitar
until something ts
W: What was it like working
with Dick Shurman on this lat-
est record?
LB: Great guitar producer,
and he always has a lot of ideas.
Weve been talking about making
a record for years.
W: How do you think this
latest record stands out from
your previous records?
LB: Wanted to make a no-fuss
Chicago record with my band,
sort of what you will hear at
shows and festivals.
W: Does your relationship
with your father and his lega-
cy still have an effect on your
music today?
LB: Always.
W: Looking back, is there
any song or record that youve
recorded that youre most
proud of?
LB: Not really. I like every-
thing.
W: What do youhave in store
for this upcoming show at the
Briggs Farm Blues Festival?
LB: Its going to be blast. I
get to play some acoustic in the
afternoon, a little gospel and a
little blues, and then for the main
stage, were going to light it up.
W: Do you approach your
acoustic sets differently?
LB: Not really, except to have a
lot of rhythm going with my feet.
W: What are you most look-
ing forward to about Briggs
Farm?
LB: Ive heard great things
real blues is what they serve.
W: Whats next for you after
that?
LB: South America, Brazil,
Chile, and Argentina. They love
the blues down there, and things
are exploding with it. Ive been
down there every year for ve
years.
W: Do you have any particu-
lar career goals you feel you
havent accomplished yet that
youd like to?
LB: I would like to be able to
play the blues for another 20 to
30 years. Dont know what else I
would do.
W: When people talk about
you, they use words like leg-
end and national treasure.
What is your reaction when
you hear something like that?
LB: I dont know about leg-
end, but Im doing my part in
keeping this music out there.
W
Blues, Briggs, and Bell
Courtesy Photo
The legendary Lurrie Bell is looking forward to serving up some real blues at the Briggs Farm Blues Fest on July 13.
MoRe inFo
16th Annual Briggs
Farm Blues Festival
featuring Lurrie Bell:
July 12-13, 88 Old
Berwick Hwy., Nesco-
peck. $28-$90. Info:
570.379.3342, briggs-
farm.com.
BRiggs FaRM BLues FesTivaL
scHeduLe
July 12
Main stage
9:45 p.m.: shakura saida
8:00 p.m.: Clarence spady
6:15 p.m.: Cedric Burnside
4:30 p.m.: georgie Bonds
Back Porch stage
9:00 p.m.: lonnie shields
7:30 p.m.: eli Cook
6:00 p.m.: TerryHarmonica Bean
4:40 p.m.: nate Myers
3:20 p.m.: Rare Form
2:30 p.m.: ed Randazzo with Bret alexander
July 13
Main Stage
9:30 p.m.: lurrie Bell
7:40 p.m.: The Kinsey Report
5:50 p.m.: Mac arnold
4:00 p.m.: TerryHarmonica Bean with The Cornlickers
Back Porch Stage
8:20 p.m.: lonnie shields
6:45 p.m.: The Badlees
5:30 p.m.: lurrie Bell (acoustic set)
4:20 p.m.: Jesse loewy
3:45 p.m.: symphonic Haze
2:30 p.m.: James Owens with dustin drevitch
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LOOK WHAT YOU MISSED
Steve Martin, Edie Brickell, and Steep Canyon Rangers@
F.M. Kirby Center 07.02.13
Photos by Jason Riedmiller For more photos, go to www.theweekender.com
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Brad Patton
FromThe Times leader
Even Steve Martin realizes it is a bit strange to
expect an audience to come out to hear a great come-
dian play the banjo.
The only equivalent, the 67-year-old actor, come-
dian, writer, and now banjo-playing bluegrass musi-
cian said, is if your wife looks in the paper and says,
Oh, Louis C.K. has written some original songs for
the harmonica; that seems like a must-see.
But much to the delight of a very large crowd at the
F.M. Kirby Center for the Performing Arts on July 2,
Martin proved to be nearly as talented with a banjo
as he is with a joke. Add in great musical and vocal
support from the Steep Canyon Rangers, a ve-piece
progressive bluegrass band, and the lyrics and voice
of Edie Brickell, and it made for one wildly entertain-
ing evening.
Martin made a joke about being referred to as a
Renaissance man, but think about it he is. Not
many other successful entertainers have branched out
into as many different elds as Martin, or have been
nearly as successful in all of the various pursuits.
And Brickell still sounds as lovely today as she
did 25 years ago on her breakthrough album, 1988s
Shooting Rubberbands at the Stars (as the leader of
the New Bohemians, with songs such as What I Am
and Circle).
Early in Tuesdays show, Martin made mention of
the incident from earlier in the day in which a man in
Wilkes-Barre returned the comedians wallet, which
Martin said he hadnt even realized he had lost.
Apparently that made the news, he said. Now
thats a slow news day.
So thank you, Wilkes-Barre. My impression of
Wilkes-Barre is everyone is 100 percent honest all the
time, he said to a rousing ovation.
Tuesdays repertoire was mostly from Martin and
Brickells recent collaboration, Love Has Come for
You, which is still at the top of the Billboard Bluegrass
Albums chart more than two months after its release.
That collection, by the way, is Martins third consecu-
tive chart-topper (following 2009s The Crow and
2011s Red Bird Alert) since he turned his attention
to music full-time.
Martin said he has been playing banjo for more than
50 years, and it showed on Tuesday as he ably kept
up with the ne musicians and vocalists of the Steep
Canyon Rangers Woody Platt (acoustic guitar),
Graham Sharp (banjo), Mike Guggino (mandolin),
Charles R. Humphrey III (bass) and Nicky Sanders
(ddle).
But I have only been playing on stage for about
four years, he told the crowd. Some nights, I play
great. Others, I am only just ne, and I wish I did
better.
I went to see Eric Clapton play the other night,
he continued. And (he paused for effect), hes just
not that funny.
The Rangers, Martin said, are not his backing band,
but rather, I am their celebrity. They may not be as
famous as the man at center stage, but the quintet
played and sang exquisitely all evening long, espe-
cially on their two-song showcase in the middle of
the set. First they did an instrumental number which
spotlighted each member to great effect, then fol-
lowed it up with some close harmony on an a cappella
spiritual number.
When Martin returned to the stage, he joined them
for an amusing little ditty called Atheists Dont Have
No Songs, one of only a small handful of songs per-
formed Tuesday that showcased both the comedy and
musicality at the same time.
Highlights of the joint numbers with Brickell
included a lovely rendition of Sarah Jane and the
Iron Mountain Baby, a train song that tells the true
story of a baby found in a suitcase by a Civil War vet-
eran, and the albums opening number, When You
Get to Asheville.
Fiddler Sanders brought the crowd to its feet with
a second train tune at the end of the set proper. Then
the musicians returned to the stage for a three-song
encore, including Remember Me This Way, a tune
that ttingly brought the evening to a close.
The man with two brains (and many talents)
Roger DuPuis
FromThe Times leader
In a city where recent thefts have some pedestrians
clutching their iPhones and purses a little tighter, one
lost wallet actually found its way home on July 2.
Its owner? Actor, comedian and musician Steve
Martin. Its rescuer? He still remains clouded in mys-
tery.
Honesty survives in Wilkes-Barre, Martin said
through a spokeswoman. The gentleman couldnt
have been sweeter, nicer, kinder, and his Batman-like
rescue of my wallet is one more reason to remember
Wilkes-Barre.
Martin was in town for a one-night appearance at
the F.M. Kirby Center on Public Square, where he
performed Tuesday evening with Edie Brickell with
the Steep Canyon Rangers.
Will Beekman, the venues programming director,
said he did not know the good Samaritans name, only
that the man telephoned the Kirby box ofce at about
10 a.m. to report what he had found.
We thought it was a joke at rst, Beekman said.
A quick check with Martins tour manager con-
rmed that the comedian had been out riding his bike
around Wilkes-Barre earlier Tuesday, Beekman said,
giving the callers story the ring of truth.
Ellen Masaitis, who works at Curry Donuts next to
the theater, told The Times Leader that the man who
found the wallet told her about the incident when he
came into the shop after meeting with Martin who,
the man said, gave him a $100 reward.
I cant remember his name, but I see him all the
time, though, Masaitis said of the Good Samaritan,
who she believes is in his 50s.
He was just a guy that was walking past Boscovs
and found Steves wallet outside of Boscovs,
Masaitis said, relating the mans account of stumbling
on Martins billfold outside the department store on
South Main Street.
Kirby box ofce manager Tina Yurko said she saw
Martin briey while he was waiting for the man to
arrive.
Steve Martin came out beforehand. He was very
anxious for the gentleman to return the wallet, and he
wanted to see the gentleman so he could thank him in
person, Yurko said.
Yurko also did not know the mans name, but she
described him as appearing like a construction work-
er or laborer who might have been working down-
town. Staff ushered Martin and the man into another
room where they could have some privacy. Yurko said
she understood that Martin offered him tickets for the
performance, but the man declined, saying his wife
was ill and he could not attend.
For Kirby staff, the incident was a bright spot not
to be forgotten and a reminder that there are good
people in the community.
I cant recall anything like it, Beekman said.
Imagine that you nd a wallet on the street, look
inside to gure out who the owner is, and it belongs
to Steve Martin.
For Masaitis and a friend at Curry Donuts, there
was an added bonus. When they saw the 67-year-old
comedian in the alley behind the theater, looking
tired, they gingerly requested autographs.
I dont think he really does autographs, but my
friend got down on his knees, Masaitis said Tuesday
afternoon as she proudly displayed a scrap of paper
bearing four words: To Ellen Steve Martin.
An honest, decent guy helps out a wild and crazy one
R E V I E W
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Summer Deck Series
Weekender
CONCERT TICKET GIVEAWAYS,
COORS LIGHT GIVEAWAYS,
FUN GAMES, & MORE
WERE BRINGINGTHE PARTYTOYOU
MAY 24TH GROTTO
HARVEYS LAKE 5:30-7:30PM
MAY 31ST TOMATO BAR
PITTSTON 5:30-7:30PM
JUNE 7TH OLD BROOK INN
SPRINGBROOK 5:30-7:30PM
JUNE 14TH BEER BOYS
WILKES-BARRE 8-10PM
JUNE 21ST OAK STREET EXPRESS
SCRANTON 5:30-7:30PM
JUNE 28TH METRO BAR & GRILL
DALLAS 5:30-7:30PM
JULY 12TH RIVER GRILLE
PLAINS 5:30-7:30PM
JULY 19TH WOODLANDS
WILKES-BARRE 5:30-7:30PM
JULY 26TH MORGANZ
PUB & EATERY,
SCRANTON 5:30-7:30PM
AUGUST 2ND KINGS PIZZA
MOUNTAINTOP 5:30-7:30PM
AUGUST 9TH THIRST TS
BAR & GRILL
OLYPHANT 5:30-7:30PM
AUGUST 16TH ARENA
BAR AND GRILL
WILKES-BARRE 5:30-7:30PM
AUGUST 23RD RODANOS
WILKES-BARRE 5:30-7:30PM
AUGUST 30TH KILDARES
SCRANTON 5:30-7:30PM
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Book reviews and literary insight
Kacy Muir | Weekender Correspondent
Open your freezer. You might
expect to nd an assortment of
items, but somewhere between
the popsicles and mixed veg-
etables is an unlikely one a
severed human arm. Unless
you are Jeffrey Dahmer, it is not
exactly your typical protein of
choice. The owner of said fridge,
Andrew Yancy, is no cannibal,
but rather begrudgingly request-
ed to store the appendage. The
ridiculous but enjoyable adven-
ture that ensues following this
opening scene establishes Carl
Hiaasens latest novel, Bad
Monkey, a satirical whodunit
that is, quite literally, a bit shy.
The novel follows protagonist
Yancy, a former Miami cop,
who, as a result of a major blun-
der with a vacuum hose, loses
his badge and is downgraded to
a health inspector. Fortunately
for Yancy, he loves trouble, and
trouble loves him. No matter
how dull his new job title may
seem, danger follows him every-
where.
A clawing heat settles over
the Keys by mid-July. The game
sh swim to deeper waters, the
pelicans laze in the mangroves
and only the hardiest of tour-
ists remain outdoors past the
lunch hour. Yancys unmarked
Ford was well air-conditioned
but he still brought a box of
Popsicles, which he positioned
beside the disjoined limb in the
cooler on the passenger side.
After helping former co-worker
and Sheriff of Monroe County
Sonny Summers with the lone
arm shed out of the southern
Florida coast, Yancy soon real-
izes that the boating mishap is
far from accidental. His suspi-
cion that the disjoined arm is
not a simple case of drowning
meets shark supper leads him
down a twisting path chock-full
of suspense, voodoo, deception,
murder, and, of course, a very
bad monkey. Hiaasen offers a
comically colorful cast of major
and minor characters, including
a multitude of female interests
whom all seem to share a love-
hate relationship with Yancy. .
Even considering Yancys sus-
pension from the police depart-
ment, he manages to uphold his
former position to serve and
protect. As a result, his superior
instinct not only leads him to
the killer, but also gives him the
opportunity to mend his past
wrongdoing.
Books released the
week of July 15:
*The english girl by
daniel silva
*supernormal: science,
yoga, and the evidence
for extraordinary Psychic
abilities by dean Radin
*First sight by danielle
steel
*aFunnyThing Hap-
pened on theWay to
Heaven: (Or, HowI Made
Peace with the Paranor-
mal and stigmatized
Zealots and Cynics in the
Process) by CoreyTaylor
*ThisTown: Two Parties
and a Funeral-Plus, Plen-
ty of Valet Parking!-in
americas gilded Capital
by Mark leibovich
*love, dishonor, Marry,
die, Cherish, Perish: a
novel by david Rakof
Abit fshy
Bad Monkey
Carl Hiaasen
Raing: WWWV
POETIC
Arts Seen Gallery (21 Public Square, Wilkes-
Barre)
Third Friday Poetry Reading: July 19, 8-9
p.m. Open mic.
The Osterhout Free Library
(71 S. Franklin St., Wilkes-Barre, www.oster-
hout.info, 570.821.1959)
David Parmelee, author of The Sea is a
Thief: July 11, 6 p.m.
Socrates Caf Discussion Group: July 11,
6:30-8 p.m.
Knit & Crochet Group: July 13, 27, 10:30
a.m.-noon.
Book Discussion of Heat Wave by Richard
Castle: July 18, 6:30 p.m.
Groundbreaking Trivia: July 23, 6 p.m.
5th Annual Raising the Roof Party: Aug. 9,
5-8 p.m., top level of Intermodal Center, Wilkes-
Barre. $15, pre-event; $20, door. Must be 21 to
attend. Rain or shine.
Fall Gala: Oct. 4, 6-11 p.m., Westmoreland
Club (59 S. Franklin St., Wilkes-Barre).
Pittston Memorial Library (47 Broad St.,
570.654.9565, pitmemlib@comcast.net)
Beneath the Surface Teen Summer
Reading Program: June 27, July 11, 18, 25, Aug. 8,
15, 2 p.m. Teens entering grades 6-12. Registration
necessary and runs June 17-22. Stop by the library
or call or email to register.
Digging Up Your Past: Local History Series
Genealogical Research Society of
Northeastern Pennsylvania: July 8, 6 p.m.
The Greater Pittston Historical Society pre-
sentation: July 15, 6 p.m.
Family nights, for children preschool to fth
grade, call to register:
How To Eat Fried Worms, movie: June 27,
5:30 p.m.
Stuffed Animal Sleepover: July 11, 6 p.m.
Gnomeo &Juilet, movie: July 18, 5:30 p.m.
Treasure Ball Game: July 25, 4 p.m.
Cartoonist Bob Heimbook reading and illus-
tration for the kids: July 25, 6 p.m.
Potato Chip Taste Test: Aug. 1, 6 p.m.
Dirt Party which will include Make Your
Own Dirt Cup Dessert and balloon creations by
JustinCredible: Aug. 5, 5:30 p.m.
Plymouth Public Library
(107 W. Main St., Plymouth, 570.779.4775)
Adult computer lessons: Daily, call to regis-
ter.
Story Time: Mon., 11 a.m. or Wed., 10:30
a.m. Toddlers/preschool children.
West Pittston Library
(200 Exeter Ave., www.wplibrary.org,
570.654.9847)
Book Club: First Tues., 6:45 p.m. Free.
Informal discussion of member-selected books.
Weekly story time for children: Fri., 1 p.m.
Free.
VISUAL
AFAGallery
(514 Lackawanna Ave., Scranton:
570.969.1040 or Artistsforart.org)
Gallery hours Thurs.-Sat., 12-5 p.m.
Here We Are in Spain: July 13, 8 p.m. $7; $5,
with valid student ID. For more info email email
HWAInSpain, or call Pat Martin at 570.604.1874.
Artist for Art (514 Lackawanna Ave,
Scranton, PA 18503 570.969.1040)
25 Years Celebration, August 24
ArtWorks Gallery
(502 Lackawanna Ave., Scranton.
570.207.1815, artworksnepa.com)
Gallery hours: Tues.-Fri., 11 a.m.-5 p.m., Sat.,
noon-3 p.m., or by appointment.
The Butternut Gallery & Second Story
Books
(204 Church St, Montrose, 570.278.4011,
butternutgallery.com). Gallery hours: Wed.-Sat.,
11a.m.-5 p.m., Sun., 12 p.m.-4 p.m.
Duets and a Taste of Nature: Work of Earl
Lehman, Carol Oldenburg, and Mark Chuck: June
1-30. Opening reception June 1, 6-8 p.m.
Camerawork Gallery (Downstairs in the
Marquis Gallery, Laundry Building, 515 Center
St., Scranton, 570.510.5028. www.cameraworkgal-
lery.org, rross233@aol.com) Gallery hours Mon.-
Fri., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.
Auto as Art: June 7 through July 31. Meet
and greet June 7, 6-8:30 p.m.
Dietrich Theatre (downtown Tunkhannock,
570.996.1500)
Civil War Exhibit: June through July.
Everhart Museum
(1901 Mulberry St., Scranton, PA,
570.346.7186, www.everhart-museum.org)
Admission $5 adults; $3 students/seniors; $2
children 6-12; members free.
The Blood is the Life: Vampires in Art &
Nature: Through July 2.
Whats in the cloud? Bats on the Atlantic
Coast: On Display through July 2.
Hazleton Art League (225 E. Broad St.,
Hazleton, hazletonartleague.org)
Annual Student Exhibit: Through June 30.
Marquis Art and Frame (515 Center St.,
Scranton, 570.344.3313)
Something from Nothing: June 7 through
July 31. Meet and greet June 7, 6-8:30 p.m.
Marquis Art & Frame (122 S. Main St.,
Wilkes-Barre, 570.823.0518)
For the Senses: Through July 6.
MoscowClayworks
Northeast Pennsylvania Professors of
Ceramic Arts exhibit: Runs through end of June.
NewVisions Studio &Gallery
(201 Vine St., Scranton, www.newvisionstudio.
com, 570.878.3970)
Gallery hours: Tues.-Sun., noon-6 p.m. and by
appointment.
Pauly Friedman Art Gallery
(Misericordia University, 570.674.6250,
misericordia.edu/art)
Gallery Hours: Mon. closed, Tue.-Thurs. 10
a.m.-8 p.m., Fri. 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Sat.-Sun. 1-5 p.m.
Marylou Chibirka: Portraits, Landscapes,
and Florals: Through July 31.
Todd Jeffreys: Wheel Thrown Clay Works:
Through July 31.
Tim Weaver: Recent Watercolors: July 31.
Pocono Arts Council (18 N. Seventh St.,
Stroudsburg. 570.476.4460. www.poconoarts.org)
Display with works by Sherwood Samet,
James Chesnick, David Cook, Jeff Bensley, and
Herbert Weigand: Opening reception July 6, 1-4
p.m. Runs through July 27.
Sordoni Art Gallery
(150 S. River St., Wilkes-Barre, 570.408.4325)
Gallery hours: Tues.-Sun., noon-4:30 p.m.
Flow, a gallery that explores the many
meanings associated with water through a selec-
tion of twenty-nine works drawn from the col-
lection of the Sheldon Museum of Art at the
University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
Schulman Gallery
(2nd foor of LCCC Campus Center, 1333 S.
Prospect St., Nanticoke, www.luzerne.edu/schul-
mangallery, 570.740.0727)
Gallery hours: Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m.
Studio Views, paintings and drawings by the
students of Georgiana Cray Bart: June 14-July 11.
A Vision of Three, featuring the work of Rob
Hay, Ryan Ward, and Mark Webber: July 19-Aug. 8
Phone-tography, featuring art captured by
cell phone photos: Aug. 16-Sept. 5.
Crayons and Care II, artwork by children of
the Litewska Hospital in Warsaw, Poland: Sept.
13-Oct. 7.
Old Masters: Oct. 25-Nov. 28.
Annual Faculty/Alumni Exhibit: Dec. 6- Jan. 2
Steamtown National Historic Site
(150 S. Washington Ave., Scranton.
570.340.5200
Gallery hours: Daily, 9 a.m.-5 p.m.)
T.W. Shoemaker Art Gallery
(312 Wyoming Ave., Wyoming)
Wyoming Monument: Through the Years:
Through July 4.
Verve Vertu Art Studio
(Misericordia University, 570.674.6250,
misericordia.edu/art)
Exhibit: Through April 2014.
Widmann Gallery
(Located in Kings Colleges Sheehy-Farmer
Campus Center between North Franklin and
North Main Streets, Wilkes-Barre, 570.208.5900,
ext. 5328)
Gallery hours: Mon. through Fri. 9 a.m. to 4:30
p.m., Sat. and Sun. as arranged. Free and open to
the public.
A Few of My Favorite Things photography
exhibition: Through Aug. 2. Opening reception
June 21, 6-8 p.m.
Expanded listings at theweekender.com. W
SPEAK AND SEE
sendyOuR lIsTIngs TO
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OR FaxTO 570.831.7375.
deadlIne Is MOndays aT 2
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Wednesday:
279 Bar & Grill: StingRay Blues
590 Bar & Grill: Dart League
Bart and Urbys: Musicians Showcase
Breakers, Mohegan Sun: Beat City @9:30
Continental Bar & Grill: Country Night w/ Hell-Yo
Hops and Barleys: Firefy Karaoke w/ DJ Bounce
My Lower End: Strawberry Jam
River Street Jazz Caf: Open Mic
Ruths Chris: Live music in the lounge
Thirst Ts: Asiz Duo & DJ MC
Woodlands: Nowhere Slow @ Sky Vuu Deck Bar
Thursday:
279 Bar & Grill: Alicia Lynn &Jody Busch
Bart and Urbys: Trivia Night
Breakers, Mohegan Sun: Big Bang Baby @10:30
Chackos: Kartune
Kings, Mountain Top: Strawberry Jam Duo
My Lower End: Tracey Dee/Cee
River Street Jazz Caf: The Kinsey Report, opening act Clarence Spady
Woodlands: Club HD inside Evolution Nightclub w/ DJ DATA. Streamside bandstand- DJ KEV
- Hosted by 97 BHT
Friday:
279 Bar & Grill: Giants of Despair
Bart and Urbys: Gene Burke
Beaumont Inn Dallas: Bill Space 9-12
Bottle Necks: Mike Dougherty
Breakers, Mohegan Sun: Nowhere Slow @9:30
Continental Bar & Grill: Graces Downfall
Grotto, Harveys Lake: Comfort Zone
Grotto, Wyoming Valley Mall: Sister Esther
Hops & Barleys: Indoor Summer Deck Party
Metro: Adam McKinley from SUZE
My Lower End: Nick Wildoner
River Street Jazz Caf: Subnotics ft members of Collective, Breaking Benjamin &The
Woody Browns Project
Studio 590 Bar & Grill: Jasper Paci acoustic
Thirst Ts: Mr. Echo
Woodlands: Evolution Nightclub 5 Day Happy Hour w/ DJ MC Outside 6-8 - DJ SlMJMM
Top 40 & Club Music w/ Host 98.5 KRZs Fishboy & Nowhere Slow Streamside/Exec
Saturday:
279 Bar & Grill: Nick Coyle of Stardog Champion
Bandits Roadhouse: Mr. Echo
Bart and Urbys: Free Jukebox
Breakers, Mohegan sun: M80 @9:30
Continental Bar & Grill: Latin Dance Night w/ live dj
Metro: Don Shappelle
My Lower End: 9 Platform 9
River Street Jazz Caf: Inc. from Los Angeles Ca. w/ opening act Mike Dougherty
Rox 52: Exit Sixxx
Stans Caf: Drive 9-1
Studio 590 Bar & Grill: DJ Cali 10-1:30
Thirst Ts: 1 Hot Mess
Woodlands: Evolution Nightclub - 98.5 KRZ Double Shot Weekend Your Bachelorette Party
Headquarters DJ Davey B & DJ Kev the Rev Playing Top 40 & Club Music w/ Host Fishboy
from 98.5 KRZ & Sugar & Spice Streamside Bandstand & Executive Lounge
Sunday:
279 Bar & Grill: Cancer Beneft 2-11
Beaumont Inn Dallas: Freeman White 4-8
Continental Bar & Grill: Pool League
The Getaway: Mr. Echo 6-9 p.m.
Kings, Mountain Top : Robb and Hammer
Metro: Big Daddy Dex
My Lower End: Alicia Lynn
River street Jazz Caf: Double Deuce ft. Mark Karan of Ratdog, Papi Mali of 7 Walkers, Matt
Hubbard of Willie Nelson Band, Bobby Vega of Zero
Woodlands: 90 Proof 90s night w/ DJ Sam I Am
Monday:
279 Bar & Grill: 279 House Band
My Lower End: Kamikaze Karaoke
Sands Casino: Mr. Echo
Studio 590 Bar & Grill: Texas HoldemTournament
Tuesday:
Continental Bar & Grill: College Night
Grotto, Harveys Lake: Two of a Kind
Hops & Barleys: Aaron Bruch
Jim McCarthys: Wanna Bs Karaoke
Metro: Karaoke 8-12
My Lower End: Free Jukebox
Tommy Boys: Open Mic
Woodlands: Dodge City Duo at SKYYV DeckBar
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Holier Than Thou
facebook.com/holierthanthoutattooandpiercing
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318 Wyoming Ave.
WYOMING
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PLYMOUTH
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12 FRI Thirst T's
13 SAT Bandit's
14 SUNThe Getaway 6-9
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19 FRI TBA
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Infinite Improbability:
A column focusing on geek
culture, discussing, analyzing, and
debating the impact of comics,
movies, music, and anything that
has a dedicated following.
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EntErtainmEnt rEport
Ralphie Aversa | Special to the Weekender
You could probably guess that
Demi Lovato wasnt going to
throw your stereotypical 21st
birthday party this Aug. 20 - but
could you have guessed that
Lovato would travel far outside
of America to partake in charity
work?
Im actually going to go to
Africa, Lovato said of her birth-
day plans. After performing on
Good Morning America,
the singer sat down with The
Ralphie Show in an interview
that aired last Monday evening.
Im just going to do a bunch of
charity stuff. I feel the best way
to celebrate anyones birthday
is just giving back and helping
others.
Lovato is quite cognizant
of the typical celebration for
turning 21 years old, and she
seems quite intent on breaking
down the stereotype.
Birthdays are all about cele-
brating life, and people are very
blessed to even make it to 21,
the singer explained, so the
last thing I think anyone should
be doing on their birthday is
poisoning themselves.
If you have followed Lovatos
career to this point, the com-
ments arent surprising. A
Disney starlet who rose to
fame touring with the Jonas
Brothers and starring on TV,
she checked out of entertain-
ment and into a rehab facility in
October 2010 to deal with bipo-
lar disorder and bulimia. The
singer returned to the spotlight
in the summer of 2011 with
Skyscraper, an emotional bal-
lad and the lead single from her
third studio album Unbroken.
That LP yielded the monster hit
Give Your Heart a Break and,
along with her story of hope and
perseverance, sent the artists
career to new heights.
It still feels like a dream,
Lovato said of her success since
leaving rehab. I dont think
theres ever one time where
I heard my song on the radio
that I didnt get excited. And if
I didnt show it, I was secretly
excited inside.
Lovato is also excited for
the success of the people she
grew up with in the business:
Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift,
the Jonas Brothers, and Miley
Cyrus, to name a few. She and
Gomez have known each other
since they were 7-years-old, and
while they both now deal with
the burdens of the spotlight in
their 20s, the Heart Attack
singer doesnt feel it necessary
to offer advice based on her own
personal struggles.
For me personally, Ive
just learned to kind of not pay
attention, Lovato said. When
people call me names or what-
ever, or they spread rumors,
its like at the end of the day,
my family knows the truth, my
friends know the truth, I know
the truth, and thats all that mat-
ters.
Lovato is currently balancing
a busy schedule that includes
her role as a judge on The
X-Factor and promoting her
latest album Demi. The LPs
next single is Made in the
USA, and the songstress makes
her directorial debut with the
music video. Although the piece
is nished, no release date has
been set yet.
- Listen to The Ralphie
Show weeknights from 7p-12a
on 97 BHT.
W
Lovato leaving on a jetplane for
birthday celebration
Former Disney star Demi Lovato
isnt celebrating her 21st birthday in
the typical way some might.
By Pete Croatto
Weekender Correspondent
Rating: W W
The Lone Ranger is so
annoying in so many ways you
leave impressed. Do we begin
with the woefully miscast lead
or a script that has the emo-
tional stability of a 13-year-old?
Whats with all the exposition?
And why is it so bloody long?
The Lone Ranger spends the
rst 140 of its 149 minutes nd-
ing itself before granting us 10
rollicking minutes. Enron stock
had a better return on invest-
ment.
Its 1869. John Reid (Armie
Hammer) returns home to
practice law in dusty Colby,
Texas. Things have changed.
His older brother, Dan (James
Badge Dale), a meat-and-
potatoes Texas Ranger, has
married Johns former ame
(Ruth Wilson). And Dan is not
impressed with his little broth-
ers book smarts and pacist
tendencies, though he lets John
tag along on his manhunt. He
even gives baby bro Dads old
badge, which means someone
will die.
Outlaw Butch Cavendish
(William Fichtner) leads an
ambush on the rangers, cap-
ping it off by literally tearing
out Dans heart. Tonto (Johnny
Depp), a Comanche whose face
paint makes him look like KISS
drummer, buries the bodies.
But a higher power, speci-
cally a Spirit Horse, wants John
to live. So, Tonto reluctantly
forms an uneasy alliance with
the do-gooder, who dons a
mask and white hat, to capture
Cavendish.
Cavendish is embroiled in a
plot involving the expanding
transcontinental railroad, sil-
ver, and Colbys somber busi-
ness leader (Tom Wilkinson),
the kind of unnecessarily tan-
gled story frequently used as a
front for depth in action fare.
Director Gore Verbinksi and his
writers maintain this fallacy to
the point of delusion, bombard-
ing us with backstories (Tonto
and Johns very rst encounter;
the story behind Tontos skit-
tish behavior), while intermit-
tently shifting the action to
1933 for reasons that make my
brain ache.
These boring diversions
dont just slow the lm to a
crawl, they create a lm with
an identity crisis. John learns
of Tontos tragic past via his
Comanche elders. Two minutes
later, Tonto and John are buried
up to their necks. Tontos rst
line: Did my name come up?
Its part of the movies relent-
less campaign to portray Tonto
and John/The Lone Ranger as
Riggs and Murtaugh on horse-
back, a tactic that would have
been strained even if it had suc-
ceeded.
Depp is enjoyable, even if
his laconic New Age nuttiness
grows wearisome, but hes
shackled by Hammer, who deliv-
ers his lines in a contemptuous
cadencesometimes with a
Texas accent, sometimes with-
outthat spells doom. The
Lone Ranger is a buddy-buddy
movie, relying on comic ban-
ter, with Depp delivering lobs
Hammer cant return. Here,
Tonto and the Lone Ranger are
a team not because of chemis-
try, but for a far less inspiring
reason: pop culture imprinting.
The writers do Hammer no
favors. His characters high
moral ber renders him a sap.
Were seven steps ahead of the
hero in guring out everything.
Its tting. The movie is per-
petually 30 minutes behind and
in no rush to make up the time,
providing blah (and hypocriti-
cal) commentary on capitalist
greed and throwing in useless
characters like Helena Bonham
Carters madam, who looks
like shes about to attend Goth
prom. And lets offer a love tri-
angle because, hey, why not?
The Lone Ranger gives us
everything in a thousand pieces
and expects us to construct a
movie. No deal, kemo sabe.
- For more of Petes cinematic
musings, please visit what-
pet eswat ching. bl ogspot . com
or follow him on Twitter, @
PeteCroatto.
Best to leaveRanger alone
Hammer and Depp are an incredibly mismatched pair in a movie thats slow on,
well, pretty much everything.
oPening tHiS Week
* PaCifiC Rim
* gRoWn uPs 2
* Killing season
* fRuitvale station
* the hunt
dvds ReleasedJuly 9:
* the host
* sPRing BReaKeRs
* dead man doWn
* admission
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LOOK WHAT YOU MISSED
Kid Rock @ Toyota Pavilion at Montage Mountain
07.06.13
Photos by Amanda Hrycyna For more photos, go to www.theweekender.com
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I want to look good in a bathing
suit.
I want my jeans fromyears ago
to ft again.
I want to be stronger/leaner.
How many times have you
made such a statement to
yourself? The words are
certainly a lot easier than the
actions, but what happens if
you put your foot down and
decide once and for all that
youre going to get on the path
to a ft and healthier you and
stick with it?
Weve got four people who took
that road for 16 weeks and lived
to tell the tale, coming out of
it much healthier and happier
than when they began, losing a
total of over 60 pounds and 50
inches between them.
The nePa Fitness Challenge
was a competition where
two teams of two whipped
themselves into shape with the
help of World Class Boxing in
Kingston, owned by sean and
Cheryl diggs, and a diet plan
set forth by Full Force nutrition,
operated by Barrett swirble
and Rebecca Klopp.
World Class Boxing ofers
classes in a variety of
programs, from Muy Thai
Kickboxing to Brazliian Jujitsu
and youth martial arts. The
establishment has also trained
over 20 fghting champions.
Challenge participants John
Popko and erica Calvert of
Team Red and Melissa Kivler
and Hayley Baseski of Team
Blue were put right on the fast
track to becoming ft.
I did everything with them
that I would do to get a fghter
in shape in 16 weeks, sean
said. It was a mix of strength
training, cardio, boxing, martial
arts. We made it so it was easy
for them to manage, fve days a
week, about an hour a day.
Though breaking into a
healthier eating regime was
difcult for all the participants,
sean said the Full Force way
was also something that was
easily manageable.
Its really just about making
healthier choices. Higher
protein, low to moderate
carbohydrate intake, and
fruits and vegetables. It was
very fexible, so if there was
something they didnt like on
the list of food they were given
that they could eat, Barrett
would modify it.
They put a lot of efort into
all of it, sean said. Here
are people coming from a
background that they never
really monitored what they
ate and all of a sudden, this;
its culture shock. But we tried
to show them that its not as
hard as people think it is. you
just need to make a conscious
choice to do it.
so, whats the trick to nailing
down healthy way of living for
the long haul?
discipline and accountability,
sean said. People see a great
workout on TV, so they buy it,
try it, nothing happens, they
quit it. They go to the gym,
their body starts to get sore,
they stop going. Thats what
makes us diferent here. When
you have somebody standing
over the top of you telling you
what to do, youre going to
do it.
Though the nePa Fitness
Challenge may have been
labeled as a competition to
start, its clear that theres no
single winner everyone wins
when it comes to the game of
pushing through and excelling
at a healthier lifestyle.
TEAM RED
THE WEEKENDER: What was
the most difcult part of the
whole experience?
JOHN POPKO: defnitely the
diet. There is so much good
food out there that is just
really bad for you. Prepping the
food for the week took a while
and I basically just stuck with
chicken breast, whole wheat
pasta, and green vegetables.
eating correctly was defnitely
key in getting results. even
after the frst or second week,
I just felt better. I didnt feel
bogged down and sluggish
anymore.
W: What did you enjoy the
most?
JP: I enjoyed seeing the results
at the end. seeing the side-
by-side shots of myself in the
before and after pictures really
made me smile. It was a lot of
hard work and discipline, but it
was defnitely worth it. I never
thought I was overweight until I
saw these photos.
W: What surprised you
the most, whether it be
something about yourself
or something about the
workout/nutrition plan?
JP: I was surprised at how
much eating healthy really
helped with the results. like
most of us, when I was younger,
Id eat anything I wanted to and
I would never gain a pound.
unfortunately Im 30 now and
need to start paying attention
to what Im putting in my body.
W: Would you recommend
this approach to getting ft
to others?
JP: absolutely. sean and
Cheryl are great coaches
and they have great class
instructors as well. no day
was the same, which really
helped keep it fun. and I never
thought of boxing as a way to
get ft, but the results show
that it defnitely works. I dont
think I ever sweat as much as
I did during these workouts in
my life!
W: Do you plan on sticking
with the workout/eating
regime?
JP: I defnitely plan on
continuing to work out. I might
not stay on as much of a
strict diet as I did during this
challenge, but Ill watch what
eat. I was eating fast food fve
times a week. I wont ever do
that again.
THE WEEKENDER: What was
the most difcult part of the
whole experience?
ERICE CALVERT: Breaking
away from all of my bad habits.
I fell into a rut of just grabbing
takeout on my way home from
work, rather than cooking a
healthy, balanced meal. Its
not just about working out fve
days a week. you have to live
a healthy lifestyle to truly see
results.
W: What did you enjoy the
most?
EC: I loved the workouts.
They were brutal, but they
arent supposed to be easy.
The workouts constantly
changed and kept me engaged
throughout the entire
challenge. There is nothing like
going 12 rounds on a heavy bag
after a long day at work.
W: What surprised you
the most, whether it be
something about yourself
or something about the
workout/nutrition plan?
EC: I still cant believe that I
lost close to 18 inches! When
I started the challenge, I was
in the worst shape of my life,
but I never considered myself
overweight. I now realize how
much weight that I had to lose.
My clothes ft better; Im down
three pant sizes. It was a full
body transformation.
W: Would you recommend
this approach to getting ft
to others?
EC: absolutely! Before I began
this challenge, I made every
excuse of why I couldnt work
out. sean and Cheryl are true
motivators. They wont let
you give up. They encourage
you every step of the way
and they push you to reach
beyond your limits. In the past,
I hated taking classes at a gym.
This is a completely diferent
atmosphere. From day one, you
feel like you are amongst family
and friends. We are all there for
the same reason.
W: Do you plan on sticking
with the workout/eating
regime?
EC: Without a doubt. This is
a lifestyle change. The nePa
Fitness Challenge is over, but
Im just getting started.
TEAM BLUE
WEEKENDER: What was the
most difcult part of the
whole experience?
MELISSA KIVLER: The diet,
absolutely just changing the
way you eat, how much you eat,
and when you eat. Breakfast is
important, healthy snacks are
important, and just eating the
right things. When youre busy,
working two jobs, taking care of
kids, the drive-through is easy,
but I learned its just as easy to
prepare your food on a sunday
for the rest of the week.
W: What did you enjoy the
most?
MK: People seeing the
transformation that I made.
Just them recognizing it
gives you confdence and the
motivation to keep going and
try harder. you love how your
clothes ft you; its like you have
a whole new wardrobe! you do
hold on to things and say, Ill
ft into this again some day,
and then you do.
W: What surprised you
the most, whether it be
something about yourself
or something about the
workout/nutrition plan?
MK: I surprised myself as
far as the ability that I had to
do the things that we did. I
think a lot of people hear the
word boxing and they think
people are hitting each other,
but thats not what it is. Its
just training that boxers do
to prepare themselves. I was
surprised in a lot of the things
I was able to do as far as the
strength training.
W: Would you recommend
this approach to getting ft
to others?
MK: Ill tell you this. I have been
going to the gym on my own for
years and never got any results.
This is kind of like having a
personal trainer and not paying
the price for one. Im 38 and
Ive never been in better shape
in my life.
W: Do you plan on sticking
with the workout/eating
regime?
MK: absolutely; I still go. Im
preparing for some ftness
bikini shows in October. I have
a whole new view on life, my
body has never worked better,
and Im like a crazy person
now; if I dont go to the gym,
Im disgusted.
WEEKENDER: What was the
most difcult part of the
whole experience?
HAYLEY BASESKI: Being a
mother. Having two kids who
are full-time students who play
after school sports and go to
CCd, trying to work fve days a
week, and ft this in with it.
W: What did you enjoy the
most?
HB: so many things. I made
some really great friends;
I was going to the morning
classes and met really great
girls. Of course, dropping a
couple pants sizes is a plus.
For me, it was a life change
that I can never be thankful for
enough. Physically, mentally,
emotionally, it just changed
who I am.
W: What surprised you
the most, whether it be
something about yourself
or something about the
workout/nutrition plan?
HB: I surprised myself in
getting up every day and trying
to squeeze it in before work
because Im not a morning
person. I also surprised myself
physically. I was a runner
before this whole thing and
thought I was doing what
everybody else should be doing
and the best I can do, but there
was so much more that I could
do. I can actually do pull-ups I
never thought Id say that at 35
years old.
W: Would you recommend
this approach to getting ft
to others and why?
HB: absolutely, because it
works. I was somebody that
went to the gym three days a
week, I was somebody that was
running, and my body did not
change in three or four years
straight of doing that. With this,
I immediately saw results. In
16 weeks, I could put a bathing
suit on and feel comfortable
with myself. I couldnt do that
over a three year period.
W: Do you plan on sticking
with the workout/eating
regime?
HB: absolutely; Im continuing
with it. I canceled my gym
membership after three weeks
of doing it. My husband is
actually starting the program
too! W
NEPAFitness Challenge a strong success
John Popko (Before)
Melissa Kivler (Before)
Hayley Baseski (After)
Hayley Baseski (Before)
CHALLENGE
RESULTS:
Team Red
John P.:
Total weight loss: 23 lbs
Total body inch loss: 12
inches
Erica C.:
Total weight loss: 20 lbs.
Total body inch loss: 17
3/4 inches
Team Blue
Melissa K.
Total weight loss: 9.5 lbs
Total body inch loss: 15
1/2 inches
Hayley B.
Total weight loss: 11 lbs
Total body inch loss: 10
inches
WORLD CLASS BOxING:
239 schuyler ave. Kingston. 570.714.1030. info@
wcbnepa.com, www.wcbnepa.com
Full Force nutrition: fullforceftnessandnutrition.com
John Popko (After)
Erica Calvert (Before)
Erica Calvert (After)
Melissa Kivler (After)
By Derek Warren
Weekender Correspondent
Liquid lunch
Beer: Lunch Pail Ale
Brewer: Breaker Brewing
Company
Style: American Pale Ale
ABV: 5.50%
Description: Breaker Brewings
Lunch Pail Ale pours a beautifully
clear amber color with a slight off-
white head that lingers and leaves a
wonderful lacing on the glass. The
aroma is a pleasing assault of citrus
hops emanating aromas of grape-
fruit, lime, and hints of pine needles
balanced with aromatic malty sweet-
ness. The taste matches the nose
perfectly. The hops are really on
display in this brew, especially the
cascade imparting a slight grapefruit
hint on the palate. The hop bite is
balanced perfectly against the sweet-
ness from the malt, especially the
Marris Otter, which imparts a nice
body to the beer as well. The malt
selections also give this beer a linger-
ingqualityonthepalatebeforeanice
dry nish. All in all, this is a superb
pale ale that I could drink all night
and not get tired of it - hell, I could
drink it all day and not get tired of
it. I would gladly include this beer in
my lunch pail, thats for sure!
Food pairing: This is a pale ale
that is a great match for most sum-
mer food, but is perfect for many
Cal-Mex dishes such as quesadillas,
burritos, pork or sh tacos, and just
about anything that includes lime
juice, chilies, and cilantro. The slight
hints of lime coming from the hops
will intensify the slight citrus charac-
teristics of thesedishes andthemalts
will enhancetheslight caramel tastes
from the meat; itll all combine for a
truly intense and delicious dinner.
Lunch Pail Ale is also great for your
favorite burgers and can certainly
handle a wide variety of toppings, so
pile them on and enjoy! Also, a nice
oily sh such as salmon can truly
appreciate the hop characteristics of
this wonderful beer. One last sugges-
tion is to try this with your favorite
fried chicken; the crispy coating and
juicy chickenwill melt into the sweet
malt and citrus hop characteristics.
Is it worth trying?: Without any
hesitation, yes! There is a reason
that this fantastic pale ale is Breaker
Brewings most popular beer and
that is because it is absolutely fantas-
tic. Paleales canbeaverytoughbeer
to pull off, as the style typically does
not leave too much roomto hide any
aws within the beer, but Breaker
Brewing pulls this off perfectly and
has createda great beer for craft beer
junkies and newbies alike to enjoy. I
personally love a nice liquidlunch on
these hot summer days and Lunch
Pail Ale certainly deserves a spot on
my lunch table, and yours as well!
Rating: WWWW
Where can I get it?: Currently
available on draft at: Sabatinis Pizza,
Exeter; The Ofce, Nicholson;
Dugans Pub, Luzerne; and also
available at the Breaker Brewing Tap
Room, Wilkes-Barre.
Remember, enjoy responsibly!
Cheers!
- Derek Warren is a beer expert,
avid homebrewer, and beer histo-
rian. Follow Dereks beer blog at
idtapthat.org.
W
Id Tap That
BEER REVIEWS
Derek Warren | Weekender Correspondent
What started in 2005 as
a homebrewing obsession
between close friends has
turned into a brewery mak-
ing much sought after beers in
Northeastern Pennsylvania.
Chris Miller and Mark
Lehman began homebrewing
after a night of drinking and
discussing good beer and the
need for more of it in their
lives. The homebrewing idea
quickly became an obsession.
We were brewing every
weekend together, said Miller.
The great thing is that we had
no shortage of testers for our
beers as we perfected our reci-
pes.
These test batches eventually
led to the recipes that Breaker
uses for its beers today.
After a few years, and many
glasses of beer, the homebrew-
ing hobby became a commer-
cial business in 2009 when the
friends legally began Breaker
Brewing Company and started
selling beers to local pubs. The
group soon gained a great repu-
tation for quality local beers.
We began with four core
beers: Anthracite Ale, Old King
Coal Stout, Malty Maguire, and
Goldies Blonde Ale, Lehman
said.
These beers are still pro-
duced, along with many more
year-round beers such as Lunch
Pail Ale (see review on page #)
and 5 Whistle Wheat. There is
also a great selection of sea-
sonal beers, such as Potbelly
Pumpkin Ale for the fall season
and Belsnickler Ale for around
Christmastime.
Breaker Brewing continued
to grow and eventually started
bottling many of its beers as
well, though the brewery still
mainly focuses on draft beer.
Bottling is a very time-con-
suming process, Lehman said.
We are getting new bottling
equipment soon to have more
bottles available.
For now though, fans can
visit the brewery at the new
Breaker Brewing tasting room
in Wilkes-Barre.
After years spent brewing
in their garage, the guys of
Breaker Brewing moved to
a new location around two
months ago and also opened
a beautiful tasting room that
enables visitors to come and
taste the beers right at the
brewery with the opportunity
to get a growler of beer filled
as well. This is also a great
place to get some one-off
batches of beer being created,
such as Watermelon 5 Whistle
Wheat, Lemongrass Ale, and
many more ideas that will be
unleashed to the public.
The future of Breaker
Brewing is looking great, with
many plans to improve upon
the tasting room by adding an
outside beer garden area and
pouring more beer. Miller said
that by the end of the sum-
mer we should have our pub
license. What exactly does
that mean?
Instead of a quick visit to
the tasting room to sample the
beer, visitors will be able to
go to the tasting room and sit
down for a pint or two.
W
Breaking on through
You dont need to leave the Breaker Brewing Companys tasting room empty-
handed when there are so many growlers waiting to be filled with delicious brews.
After a long stint of brewing at home, Breaker Brewing Company has moved to
a new location in Wilkes-Barre.
ONTAP
Breaker BreWing
Company, 787 e.
northampton St., WilkeS-
Barre. taSting room
hourS tueSdayand
Friday, 5-9 p.m., Saturday,
noon-5 p.m.
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BAZAARS/FESTIVALS
2nd Annual Pennsylvania Organic
FarmFest:
aug. 2-3, grange Fairgrounds, Centre
Hall. For more info visit farmfest.
paorganic.org, or call Kathryn Tokarz at
814.422.0251.
27th annual Pocono State Craft
Festival
(www.poconocrafts.comor call 570-
476-4460.)
Aug. 24-25, Quiet Valley (347 Quiet
Valley Road, Stroudsburg). $6, adults;
Free, children 12 and under.
St. John the Baptist Orthodox
Church
(93 Zerby Ave, Edwardsville)
15th Annual Ethnic Food Festival: Aug.
24, 11 a.m.-6 p.m.
BENEFITS/CHARITY EVENTS
5th Annual Golf Tournament
benefting the 1st Lt. Jefrey DePrimo
Memorial Fund, Luzerne Foundation:
Aug. 17, 1:30 p.m., Wilkes-Barre Golf
Club. $75. Register at deprimogolf.com
or call 570.709.0916 for more info
American Cancer Society
Making Strides Against Breast Cancer
of Wyoming Valley walk kickof break-
fast: Aug. 20, 7:30 a.m., Wilkes-Barre/
scranton Railriders stadium, Moosic.
American Red Cross of Lackawanna
County
Roof-A-Thon: Aug. 7-9, Wendys, Davis
street, scranton.
Camp Papillion Pet Adoption and
Rescue
(570.420.0450, camppapillion.org)
Information day: July 28, 11 a.m.-3
p.m., Wal-Mart (Route 940, Mount
Pocono)
Yard sale and adoption day: July 13, 8
a.m.-2 p.m., AVHVeterinary GroupValley
drive, Penargyl).
Candys Place (570.714.8800)
4th Annual Luncheon and Fash-
ion Show: July 28, 11 a.m.-3 p.m.,
Woodlands Inn (Wilkes-Barre). $25, per
person; $250, table of 10.
Doing it for Lola breast cancer
fundraiser:
aug. 10, 1-10 p.m., american legion
Post 781, Mountain Top. $15 dona-
tion, kids 12 and under free. Bike run/
scavenger hunt begins at 12:30 p.m. at
Outsiders in Wilkes-Barre.
Family Service Association of NEPA
5th annual Pauly Friedman Family 5K
Walk/Run: Aug. 11, registration 8:30
a.m., race 9:30, Misericordia University,
Dallas. $25. For more info or to pre-
register call 570.823.5144 or emailf-
sawv.ruthkemmerer@verizon.net.
For the Love of Pete,
blood drive in memory of Peter J.
Bonczewski Jr.: July 27, 8 a.m.- 2 p.m.,
st. anthony and st. george Maronite
Church (311 Park Ave., Wilkes-Barre).
Mike Meoni Memorial Scholarship
Fund
1st Annual Mike Meoni Memorial Golf
Tournament: Aug. 10, Sleepy Hollow
Golf Course, Greenfeld Twp. Tourna-
ment format is a four person captain
and crewteamfor 19 holes. $65 per
person; $260 per foursome. For more
information visit MikeMeoni.com.
Safe Haven Dog Rescue
(www.safeHavenPa.org, safeHaven@
epix.net)
Volunteer meeting: July 16, 6:30 p.m.,
Cherrys Family Restaurant (Route 209
near Route 534, Kresgeville)
Adoption days: July 21, 11 a.m.-3 p.m.,
Tractor Supply (Route 209, Brodheads-
ville)
Susan G. Komen for the Cure
6th Annual Rally for the Cure Golf
Tournament: July 27, Villas Crossing
golf Course (521 golf Road, Tamaqua).
$65 covers green fees, golf cart, food,
soda, and prizes. Registration for the
four person scramble begins at 11:00
amwith a shotgun start at 12:30 pm.
For more details or for sponsorship
opportunities, contact Debbie at 570-
386-4515.
The Tipsy Turtle
Annual Golf Tournament for the Make
life Count Charity, aug. 4.
Wayne Memorial Auxiliary Hospital
Crazy for Patsy, a concert of songs
by the late country legend Patsy Cline:
July 21, 3-6 p.m., Edhardts Waterfront,
Lake Wallenpaupack. $32, includes hors
doeuvres. Tickets must be purchased
in advance by calling committee Chair-
woman Katy Wood at 253-5779.
CAR & BIKE EVENTS
570 Riders Bike Nights
Runs every Monday in the summer. 6
p.m., Dairy Queen, Rt. 315
Coal Cracker Cruisers Car Club
(570.876.4034)
Cruise Night: Aug. 2, Sept. 6, 6-9
p.m., advance auto Parts (Route 6,
Carbondale).
15th Annual Car Show: Sept. 15, 9 a.m.
For more info contact Joann spalnick,
570.876.4034.
McDonalds (Route 590 Hamlin, Pa)
Car Cruise: Every second Friday of
June, July, August, September, 6 P.M.
Montage Mountain Classics (Thurs.,
6-9 p.m., Fri., 6-10 p.m., sat., 5-9 p.m.)
Car Cruises:
July 12, aug. 9, sept. 13, 6-10 p.m.,
southside shopping Center, scranton.
Cruise to Beneft Ronald McDonald
House: Sept. 22, 2-6 p.m. Rain date
sept. 29.
July 20, Aug. 17, Sept. 21, 5-9 p.m.,
Johnny Rockets, Montage Mountain.
Aug. 2, Sept. 6, 5-9 p.m., Pittston
Cruise, Tomato Festival parking lot.
St Joes Car Show: Aug. 18, 9 a.m.-3
p.m., Pittston Bypass. Rain date Aug. 25.
Shickshinny Forwards 2nd Annual
Car Show and Party in the Park:
aug. 3, north susquehanna avenue
along susquehanna Warrior Trail in
shickshinny. Car registration 10 a.m.-
noon, shownoon-3 p.m., party until 5
p.m. Judging at 2:30 p.m. $15, show
vehical registration in advance; $20, at
the gate. For info visit shickshinnyfor-
ward.com/car or call 570.550.0721
SCHOTT Car and Bike Show
benefts SCHOTT colleague who is
bravely facing cancer: July 27, rain date
July 28, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. $10, registra-
tion fee. For more info contact ed at
camaro@ptd.net or 570.474.6484.
Third Annual Car Show
by Volunteers of Loving Care: July 14
(Rain date: July 21), 9 a.m.-3 p.m., Lau-
rel Mall. $10, day of show; $8, advance.
For more information contact Kris,
570.582.7329 or Jef, 570.956.6377.
CHURCHES
Ss. Cyril and Methodius Ukrainian
Catholic Church
(135 River st., Olyphant)
Olyphant Queen City Nights: July 11,
5-10 p.m., July 12, 5-11 p.m., July 13,
4-11 p.m., by the Boro Building, of of
Lackawanna Ave./WillowStreet and
nestor Chylak street.
St. John Vianney Parish
(704 Montdale Road, scott Twp.
570.254.9502.)
Annual summer rummage and bake
sale: July 12-14, 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Friday and
Sunday, 9 a.m.-6:30 p.m. Saturday.
St. Pauls Episcopal Church Hall
(60 Church st., Montrose)
Second Sunday July Vesper Service:
July 14, 5 p.m.
SEE AGENDA, PAGE 36
last week
ACROSS
1 Stitches
5 Corn spike
8 React in horror
12 Handels Messiah, e.g.
14 Aware of
15 Algonquian leader
16 Individuals
17 Of course
18 Cancel out
20 Poes bird
23 Beetle Bailey dog
24 On in years
25 Luzon language
28 Neither mate
29 Commandments bearer
30 Sheeps comment
32 First person to orbit the
Earth
34 Gear teeth
35 Hits head-on
36 Cause, as havoc
37 Government in power
40 Cry of discovery
41 American -
42 Madame Buttery setting
47 Lass
48 Shook in fear
49 eyelid woe
50Witness
51 longings
DOWN
1 Mayday!
2 Historic period
3 Joker
4 Remained
5 Cupids alias
6 Melody
7 X-ray discoverer
8 Giant number
9 - Karenina
10 Undo a dele
11 Sit for a picture
13 Portent
19 Greek vowels
20 Skedaddled
21 Awestruck
22 Miles of Hollywood
23 Refuge
25 Persecutes
26 Reed instrument
27 Pop singer Lady -
29 Sirs partner
31 Request
33 Ornamental grating on a car
34 White Christmas crooner
36 Kapow!
37 Fixes illicitly
38 Rewrite, maybe
39 Bloodcurdling
40 Curved molding
43 Exist
44 Brewery product
45 Barbies companion
46 Egos counterparts
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Falafel, Gyros, Grape
Leaves, Tabouli
and Kibbi
Considering Abortion?
Lets Talk
714-4673
80002693
Mon-Sat 12-8 p.m. 570-501-9639
10% off services for those traveling from the WB/Scranton area
www.customtat2.com /customtat2
168 Susquehanna Blvd
West Hazleton, PA 18202
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weekender: hip since 1993
theweekender.com for stuff your friendss havent seen
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EVENTS
Back Mountain Martial Arts
(114o Memorial Highway, dallas.
570.675.9535, info@ufa-a.com, www.
ufa-a.com.)
Free anti-bully seminar: Aug. 24, 9:30-
11:30 a.m.
THE COOPERAGE PROJECT
(1030 Main St., Honesdale)
570.253.2020, thecooperageproject.org
(Donations accepted and appreciated
at the door at all events.)
Family Game Night: July 11, 6-9 p.m.
Dietrich Theater
(60E. Tioga Street, Tunkhannock,
570.996.1500, www.dietrichtheater.com).
Adult Classes:
ADay at the Tunkhannocks Riverside
Park: July 20, 1-8 p.m.
Open Mic Night: July 26, 7 p.m., sign-
ups 6:30. Feature Brian Fanelli 8:15 p.m.
Gathering of Singers & Songwriters
12: Aug. 21, 7:30 p.m. Admission by
donation.
Open Mic Night: Aug. 23, 7 p.m., sign-
ups 6:30.
Classes for children:
Acting Camp for Kids: July 22-26,
1:30-3 p.m. Ages 6 to 12. $60.
All About Pottery & Sculpture Camp:
July 22-26, 4-5:30 p.m. Ages 5 to 12.
$60.
Art Explorers Camp: July 29-Aug. 2,
4:30 p.m. Ages 5 to 12. $60.
Dance, Dance, Dance: Aug. 5-6. 10-
10:45 a.m., ages 2 and 3; 11-11:45 a.m.,
ages 4 to 6; noon-12:45 p.m., ages 7 to
9; 1:30-2:15 p.m., special needs. Free.
Despicable You? Theatre &Visual Arts
Camp: July 22-26, 10 a.m.-noon. Ages
5 to 12. $60
Jammin in a Jugband: July 15-17, 19,
10-11:15 a.m. Ages 6 to 12.
Monsters Art School: Theatre &Visual
Arts Camp: July 8-12, 10 a.m.-noon.
Ages 5 to 12. $60.
Quilting for Kids Landscapes:
Wednesdays through July 31, 3:30-5
p.m. Ages 6 and up. $6 per class.
Trash to Treasures Camp: July 15-19,
4-5:30 p.m. Ages 5 to 12. $60.
Your Epic Journey: Theatre &Visual
Arts Camp: July 29-Aug. 2, 10 a.m.-
noon. Ages 5 to 12. $60.
F.M. Kirby Center
(71 Public Square, Wilkes-Barre.
570.826.1100.)
W. Curtis Montz Summer FilmSeries:
($4, matinees; $6, evening shows)
Searching for Sugar Man: July 10, 1
and 7:30 p.m.
To Kill a Mockingbird: July 17, 1 and
7:30 p.m.
Amour: July 24, 1 and 7:30 p.m.
The Sessions: Aug. 7, 1 and 7:30 p.m.
Raiders of the Lost Ark: Aug. 14, 1 and
7:30 p.m.
Hyde Park on Hudson: Aug. 21, 1 and
7:30 p.m.
Hitchcock: Aug. 28, 1 and 7:30 p.m.
Psycho: Sept. 4, 1 and 7:30 p.m.
Friends of the Kingston Pool
3rd Annual Family Fun Night: July 20,
7-11 p.m., corner of Hamilton and Lath-
rop streets, Kingston. $10 per person.
For more info contact 570.288.0554.
Irem Clubhouse
(64 Ridgeway Drive, Dallas)
Clambake on the Patio: July 13, 508
p.m. $35 per person.
Smoky Blues & Barbecue Night: July
17, 6-9 p.m. $18. Rain or shine. Reserva-
tions required.
Moonlight Serenade Dinner Dance:
July 27, 6-11 p.m. $45 per person.
Pre-payment and entre choice are
required by July 18.
Concerts, 7 p.m. each night:
July 14:The Legends, music fromthe
50s and 60s
July 21: Wyoming Valley Band Patriotic
Concert
July 28: The Whery Family, Southern
Gospel Music
Aug. 4: Memory Lane, Oldies but
Goodies
Aug. 11:Wyoming Valley Barbershop
Harmony Chorus
Aug. 18:Orpheus Choral Society
Aug. 25:IremString Band
Jessup Art Walk:
Second Saturday of every month.,
beginning July 13. For more info visit
jessupartwalk.info or email info@jes-
supartwalk.info.
Keep Wine-ing, He Might Start to
Look Like Prince Charming
Comedy tour featuring Jeannine Luby
and her special guest Liz Russo from
Carolines on Broadway: July 11, 6 p.m.,
Mountain ViewWinery, Stroudsburg.
$25, includes frst glass of wine. Ad-
vance sales only at JeannineLuby.com.
This is an outdoor event.
Keystone College
(One College Green, La Plume,
570.945.8000, keystone.edu)
The Gathering:July 18-21.
Sixth annual Jazz Institute at
Keystone College: July 29-Aug. 2.
For more info contact Crystal Seigle,
570.945.8580 or e-mail crystal.seigle@
keystone.edu .
Lacawac Sanctuary
(94 Sanctuary Road, Lake Ariel)
Music in the Forest series:
Wargo Stevenskey Flute & Guitar Duo:
July 13
The Old Geezers: July 14.
Lackawanna College
(501 Vine St., Scranton, 1.877.346.3552,
lackawanna.edu)
Environmental Institute (10 Mofat Dr.,
Covington Twp.)
Outdoor Career Adventure Camp: July
15-19, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Ages 14-17. $95 per
camper.
Eco Explorers Day Camp: July 22-26
or July 29-Aug. 2, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Ages 9
and 10. $95 per camper.
Earth Connections Day Camp: Aug.
5-9 or 12-16, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Ages 11 to 13.
$95 per camper.
Misericordia University
Open house for adult learners: Aug.
13, 4-7 p.m.
Open house for high school students
and parents: Aug. 17, registration at 9
a.m., 10 a.m.-3 p.m.
Mountain Grange No. 567
Monthly feamarket: Second Saturday
of each month. 9 a.m.-2 p.m., Mountain
Grange Hall (1632 W. 8th St., Carver-
ton).
76 University Drive , Hazleton,
570.450.3000, www.hn.psu.edu)
Penn State Wilkes-Barre
(Rte. 115, Lehman, 570.675.2171,
wb.psu.edu)
18th Annual Alumni Constituent
Society Golf Tournament: July 12,
11:30 a.m., 1 p.m. shotgun start, Blue
Ridge Trail Golf Club (Mountain Top).
For more information contact Karen at
570.675.9228 or klb14@psu.edu.
ScrantonMade and Lackawanna
County
are looking for artists to sell their wares
at the 1st Annual Arts on the Square:
July 27. Vendor application and more
details can be found at www.artson-
thesquare.net.
R3 OPS, the Mud Run with Op-
tions:
July 20, Northeast Fairgrounds, Pittston
Township. Visit www.r3ops.comor like
its Facebook page at www.facebook.
com/r3ops.
Scranton Cultural Center
(420N. WashingtonAve., Scranton,
570.346.7369, scrantonculturalcenter.org)
Dancing with the NEPAStars with
Chef Kate Gabriele and Jon Stevens:
July 18, 5:30 p.m. $20.
The Pennsylvania FilmSchool Week-
end Workshop Series: July 20-21, 10
a.m.-4 p.m. $399 for both workshops,
$250 per workshop. Pre-registration
required.
Self Discovery Wellness Arts Center
(200 Lake Ave., Montrose,
570.278.9256 or e-mail wellness@epix.
net, wellnessarts.com)
Invoking the Violet Flame with Debra
Kalmanowicz, Reiki Master/ Psychic
Medium: July 12, 6 p.m. $20, book
included.
Howto clear your Chakras using
Crystals with Donna Will, EEM-CP/
LETTherapist /Colon Hydro Therapy
Therapist: July 13, noon. $20.
Dynamic Kundalini Meditation: July
16, 7 p.m. $10.
What is and howto make KOMBUCHA
with Hana Haig, Nutrionist: July 17, 6:30
p.m. Free.
Womens Gathering: July 19, 6:30 p.m.
Free.
Psychic Circle with Debra Kalmanow-
icz, Reiki Master/Psychic Medium: July
23, 6:30 p.m. $20. Space is limited.
Oneness Meditation with Deeksha:
July 26, 7-8:30 p.m. $10.
Introduction to Essential Oils and
Aromatherapy with Susan Arthur,
Massage Therapist / Herbalist: July 27,
1 p.m. $20.
LED Light Therapy Demonstration
with Hana Haig, Nutritionist: July 30,
6:30 p.m. Free.
The Psychology of Transformation
Part I: July 31, 6-8 p.m. $20.
Singing Boys of Pennsylvania/Key-
stone Girls Choir
(St. Luke United Church of Christ,
Belfast 610.759.6002)
Summer Day Camp, July 15-21 8:30
A.M. to 5 P.M.
Unity of NEPA: A Spiritual Center
(140 S. Grant St., Wilkes-Barre.
570.824.7722.)
Wednesday Webinar - The Practical
Visionary: HowYou Can Co-Create the
NewWorld with Corrine McLaughlin:
July 10, 6:30 p.m. $5.
Next installment of The Bridge cover-
ing Coming Home-Union With Source.
Presented by Davienne Piatt: July 17,
6:30 p.m.
Mysteries of John Bible Study Class:
July 23, 11:45 a.m.-1:15 p.m.
Waverly Community House
(1115 N. Abington Rd., Waverly, waverly-
comm.org)
CommSquare Fair: July 25, 4:30-8
p.m.
Camp Create: Aug. 5-9, 12-16, 10
a.m.-2 p.m. Art and theater camp for
children with special needs.
CommClassic Car Show: Aug. 11, 4
p.m.
Cocktails for the Courts: Aug. 9, 5:30-
7:30 p.m.
Wyoming Area Kiwanis Club
Movie Nights in the Park: June 28, July
26, Aug. 30, 7 p.m., Dailey Park (West
Wyoming). Crafts and kids activities at
7 p.m., movie begins at 8:15. Popcorn
and drinks provided; please bring
blankets and chairs.
Wyoming Valley West Class of 78
Reunion:
July 12-14. Please sign up and purchase
tickets by July 5 at www.WVW78.com.
LOCAL HISTORY
Eckley Miners Village
(located nine miles east of Hazleton,
just of Route 940; 570.636.2070; www.
eckleyminers.org)
1940s Weekend, the World War II
Years: July 27-28, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.
Old Jail Museum
(128 W. Broadway, JimThorpe.
570.325.5259. www.TheOldJailMu-
seum.com.)
TOURS: Through Labor Day, daily
(closed Wednesday), noon to 4:30 p.m.
$6, adult; $5, senior over 65 and high
school; $4, children ages 6-12; free,
children under 5.
LEARNING
Endless Mountains Zendo
(104 HollowRoad, Stillwater.
570.925.5077, endless@epix.net)
Obon Lantern Ceremony - Evening of
Remembrance: Aug. 3, 5:30-10 p.m.
The Fear of Flying Seminar:
July 24, 7 p.m., Anthracite Museum
Auditorium(top of McDade Park),
Scranton. $25, pre-registration; $30, at
the door.
Pocono Arts Council
(18 N. Seventh St., Stroudsburg.
570.476.4460. www.poconoarts.org)
Oil Painting: Aug. 8, 15, 22, 29,
6:30-8:30 p.m. $72, member; $80, non-
member; $60, senior member; $65,
senior non-member.
Acrylic Painting: Aug. 5, 12, 19, 26,
9:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. $110, member;
$120, non-member; $90, senior mem-
ber; $95, senior non-member.
Intermediate Watercolor: Aug. 4, 11,
18, 25, 1-4 p.m. $110, member; $120,
non-member; $90, senior member;
$95, senior non-member.
Play the Blues All Instruments: Aug.
6, 7 p.m. Bring own instrument. $20
member; $25, non-member; $15, senior
member; $20, senior non-member.
Basic Drawing: Aug. 7, 14, 21, 28,
6:30-8:30 p.m. $72, member; $80, non-
member; $60, senior member; $65,
senior non-member.
Watercolor Painting for the Beginner:
Aug. 5, 12, 19, 26, 6:30-8:30 p.m. $72,
member; $80, non-member; $60, se-
nior member; $65, senior non-member.
Jewelry Making Workshop: Aug. 6, 13,
1-4 p.m. $50, member; $60, non-mem-
ber; $40, senior member; $45, senior
non-member. $10 materials fee.
Sil-Lum Kung-Fu &Tai-Academy
(509 Pittston Avenue, (3rd foor).
Private classes are available. For more
info contact: Master Mark Seidel,
570.341.8089.)
Adult classes: Tuesday &Thursday,
7-8 p.m; Saturday & Sunday, 10-11 a.m.
Childrens classes (ages 9 & up):
Saturday, 11 a.m.-noon
Yang Style Tai-Chi Chuan Adult class-
es: Saturday & Sunday, 11 a.m.-noon
Wudang Swordsmen Academy
(269 S Washington Street, Wilkes-
Barre, 570.630.0088, www.Wudang-
Swordsmen.com, info@WudangSwords-
men.com)
Wudang Taijiquan (traditional tai chi):
Mon., Wed., 6:10-7:30 p.m.
Wudang Gongfu (internal kung fu):
Tue., Thu., 6:10-7:30 p.m.
Youth Kung Fu (ages 10-13): Mon.,
Wed., 5:00-6:00 p.m.
Baguazhang (Eight TrigramPalm):
Sun., 10:50 a.m.-12:50 p.m.
Cardio Kung Fu: Mon., Wed., 10:00-
11:00 a.m.
Tai Chi for Health: Tue., Thu.,10:00-
11:00 a.m.
Daoist Sitting Meditation: Sun., 4:30-
5:30 p.m.
Morning Seated Qigong (meditation &
breathwork): Tue., Thu., 9:00-9:50 p.m.
Pushing Hands Circle (open to all tai chi
players in the area): Sun., 3:00-4:00p.m.
Open Wudang Training Hall: Sun.,
1:00-3:00 p.m.
OUTSIDE
Cantolao USA Soccer Club
Tryouts: U-16 girls (96), U-13 boys
(99), U-12 boys and girls (00), U-10
girls (02) and U-9 boys (03). U-13
boys and U-12 Boys and girls are Tues-
days and Thursdays, girls practice from
5-6:30 and boys practice from6:30
to 8. U16 girls, U10 girls and U9 boys
practice Wednesdays and Friday. U10
and U9 practice from5-6:30 and U16
practice 6:30-8. Held at Dorrance Fields
in Mountain Top. If interested contact
head coach Hubert Herrera via email at
Herrera@epix.net or at 570.574.5283.
Frances Slocum State Park
Raccoons for Kids: July 13, 2 p.m.
ages 3-5.
Critters in the Creek: July 13, 4 p.m.,
ages 5 and up.
Hoorayfor Hummingbirds: July13, 7p.m.
Camoufage Crazy: July 20, 2 p.m.
ages 6-12.
Whats Hiding Under that Log?: July
20, 4 p.m.
Native American Storytelling and
Drumming: July 20, 7 p.m.
Down and Dirty Kayak Paddle: July
27, 2 p.m. Ages 12 and up. Registration
required by calling 570.696.9105.
Coal Mining Songs of the Northeast:
July 27, 7 p.m.
Friends of Salt Springs Park
Tamarack (aka Connector) Trail Hike:
July 20, 10 a.m. Meet at Wheaton
House. Fee.
Water Quality Monitoring: July 28, 1
p.m. Members free.
Hemlock Trail Hike: Aug. 3, 7 p.m. Fee.
Got Beer? Hop to It!: Aug. 4, 1
p.m. Meet at Wheaton House. Pre-
registration appreciated by calling
570.967.7275. Fee.
Perseids Meteor Shower: Aug. 11, 8:30
p.m. Meet at Wheaton House. Free.
ClifTrail Hike: Aug. 17, 11 a.m. Meet at
Buckley Road parking lot. Fee.
Full Moon Biken Bonfre: Aug. 21, 6
p.m. Adults only. Free.
Mushrooms and Mycilia: Aug. 25, 1
p.m. Free.
Upper Fall Brook Trail Hike: Aug. 31. Fee.
Salt Springs Celebration: Aug. 31, 11
a.m.-5 p.m.
Lackawanna Historical Society
(The Catlin House, 232 Monroe Avenue,
Scranton, 570.344.3841.)
Guided downtown walking tours:
11 a.m.: July 13, 27, Aug. 10, 24. Tours
are free, but reservations are required
by the Thursday prior to the tour date.
Nescopeck State Park
(1137 Honey Hole Rd., Drums,
570.403.2006)
Kayaking: Level Three Bradys
Lake Paddle: July 17, 1:30 p.m. Meet at
Bradys Lake parking lot. Must register
in advance. Ages 16 and up.
Just for Kids: Art in the Park with
Artist Jan Lokuta: July 21, 1 p.m. Ages 3
and up. Must register in advance.
Just for Kids Kayaking: Level One: July
31, 9:30 a.m. Ages 9-15. Must register in
advance. Meet at Lake Francis.
Kayaking: Level One: July 31, 11 a.m.
Ages 16 and up. Meet at lake Frances.
Must register in advance.
Kayaking: Level Two: July 31, 1 p.m.
Ages 16 and up. Meet at Lake Frances.
Must register in advance.
SOCIAL GROUPS
St. Josephs Senior Social Club
Meeting: June 20, 1 p.m., Mt. Carmel
(WilliamSt., Pittston)
Fourth Annual Picnic: July 17, 1-5 p.m.,
Checkerboard Inn, Trucksville. $20.
Expanded listings at theweekender.com.
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weekender: hip since 1993
theweekender.com for stuff your friendss havent seen
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The glorious (or not) 15 minutes
Dear Mom and Dad,
When youre on a reality show, it
is said that you get your 15 minutes
of fame. I personally experienced
this a few summers ago when I
was on the ABC reality series I
Survived A Japanese Game Show,
and hosted Sumo wrestling competi-
tions at The Woodlands every week
after the show.
In exchange for free drinks, I
would referee drunk people in giant
Sumo wrestling fat-suits, battling it
out to knock the other down!
The night of my rst personal
appearance ever, I was lled with
excitement. Since I was getting paid
in free alcohol, my friend Kimberly
decided it would be best if she were
to drive. I need to pick up this
guy rst that I met at a concert last
week, she insisted. I invited himto
come with us.
When we picked him up, he said
that he ordered wings, and we need-
ed to take him to get his order on
the way. Theyll have food at The
Woodlands, I assured him.
Nah, Im good, he replied. Ill
just get these wings.
Already cutting it close to being
on time for my appearance, we had
to take this dude to some dive bar to
pick up his wings.
Kimberly and I sat in the car wait-
ing for him when he went inside to
retrieve his order. After waiting for
15 minutes, I started to get pissed.
Im supposed to be at The
Woodlands right now! I screamed.
Im late for my very rst personal
appearance because some dude you
met at a concert needs wings? Lets
GO!!!
Kimberly decided to go inside
and get him instead.
By the time we got to The
Woodlands, I was 45 minutes late.
Can you drive around for a few
more minutes? he asked. I want to
nish these wings.
I had Kimberly drop me off while
she drove around with him for the
next 20 minutes so he could nish
his wings. Rolling in solo, reeking of
Franks Red Hot wasnt exactly what
I had in mind when I pictured arriv-
ing fashionably late to my rst ever
personal appearance.
Pissed off, I started to take
advantage of my pay - by garbage
drinking. Before I knew it, I was
#WhiteBoyWasted.
Somehow I managed to get into
a drunk argument with the worlds
most annoying radio personal-
ity sidekick to ever exist (Im sure
everyone knows who I mean).
On a roll of being a hot mess, I
decided I wanted to sing with the
band. I then jumped on stage, and
started yelling at the lead singer of
M80 to give me her microphone
as she was singing! WHO DOES
THAT?
When I was escorted off the
stage by a security guard, my
friends decided it was time to
take me home. Sorry Mom and
Dad for almost getting kicked
out of an event where I was the
guest of honor. Thats what hap-
pens when you take jobs that
pay in liquor
Love,
Justin
Was Justins time in the spotlight fame, or shame?
sorry mom & dad
A 20-somethings Wild Adventures
Justin Brown | Weekender Correspondent
By Chuck Shepherd
Weekender Wire services
SIEGINGCHEATERS
As many as 50 exam monitors were
forced to take cover at a high school
in Zhongxiang, China, in June, fend-
ing off outraged students (and some
parents) who hurled insults and
stones at them after the monitors
blocked cheating schemes on the all-
important national gaokao exams.
(It was siege warfare, and eventu-
ally hundreds of police responded,
according to a dispatch in the Daily
Telegraph of London.) Metal detec-
tors had found secret transmitters and
contraband cellphones used by groups
beaming in exam answers from out-
side. Independent proctors had been
assigned because of longstanding
suspicions that the schools own proc-
tors routinely enabled cheating (with
results such as the 99 identical papers
submitted in one subject on the previ-
ous years exam). Said one student (in
the mob of about 2,000), noting how
widespread cheating is nationally,
There is no fairness if you do not let
us cheat (also).
THINGS PEOPLE BELIEVE
Sheriffs and government deed-
recorders in several states have
reported annoying attempts recently
by Moorish American nationals to
conscate temporarily vacant houses
(often mansions), moving in with-
out inhibition, changing the locks,
and partying joyously based on
made-up documents full of gobble-
dygook and stilted legalese granting
them sovereignty beyond the reach
of law-enforcement. There is a ven-
erable Moorish Temple Science of
America, but these trespassers in
Florida, Maryland, Tennessee, and
other states are from fanciful offshoots
that demand reparations (usually in
gold) for Christopher- Columbus-era
Europeans having stolen their land.
A North Carolina police investigator
told the Washington Post in March
that every state is experiencing the
Moorish American invasion.
Britains Anomalous Mind
Management Abductee Contactee
Helpline is the nations weirdest sup-
port group, wrote the Daily Mirror
in June, providing a range of services
to victims of kidnapping by extrater-
restrials and other haunting incidents
to about 1,500 people a year, accord-
ing to co-founder Miles Johnston.
AMMACH uses an ordinary wall-stud
detector to locate bodily implants
and employs magnetic eld meters
and mineral lamps to identify signa-
tures left on a skins atoms by visits to
another dimensional reality, Johnston
explained. We are under the threat of
termination as a species if we do not
get this sorted out.
CLICHES COME TOLIFE
Sheriffs deputies arrested Shane
Kersey, 35, in March as the one who
made phone calls to four schools in
New Orleanss Westbank neighbor-
hood, threatening to burn them down.
When taken into custody, Kersey had
aluminum foil wrapped around his
skull and secured by a baseball cap but
explained to an ofcer that he needed
it to prevent microwave signals from
entering his head.
Among the character witnesses
in May at the New York City sex-traf-
cking trial of alleged pimp Vincent
George, Jr., 33, and his father were
three of the younger mans ladies, who
praised himunconditionally to the jury
as a good father to the children they
bore for him and as the person respon-
sible for helping them kick their drug
habits. Heather Keith, 28, and Danielle
Geissler, 31, referred to each other as
Vincent, Jr.s wife-in-law. Geissler
admitted that George (Daddy)
slapped her around a bit, explaining
that they both slapped each other
around sometimes but never over work
or staying in the (prostitution) life.
(Three weeks later, the Georges were
acquitted of sex trafcking, although
convicted of money- laundering.)
BRIGHT IDEAS
Technology companies are mak-
ing great strides in odor-detection
robots, valuable in identifying subtle
scents ranging from contaminants in
beer brewing to cancerous tumors in
the body. And then there is CrazyLabo
in Fukuoka, Japan, which is marketing
two personal-hygiene robots, available
for special occasions such as parties,
according to a May BBC News report.
One detector, shaped as a womans
kissable head, tests breath odor and
responds (e.g., smells like citrus;
theres an emergency taking place).
The other, resembling a dog, checks a
persons feet and can either cuddle up
to the subject (no odor) or appear to
pass out.
The local council in Brunete,
Spain, near Madrid, has now seen a
radical drop in unscooped dog drop-
pings after employing volunteers to
nd the names of derelict dogs. They
then matched the dog with the towns
dog registrations to obtain the owners
addresses, then mailed them packages
containing their dogs business (term-
ing it lost property).
CRME DE LA WEIRD
Yasuomi Hirai, 26, was arrested
in Hyogo Prefecture, Japan, in June
after being identied in news reports
as the man who had crawled dozens
of meters in an underground gutter
solely to gain access to a particular
sidewalk grate near Konan Womens
University in order to look up at skirt-
wearers passing over the grate. After
one pedestrian, noting the pair of eyes
below, summoneda police ofcer, Hirai
scurried down the gutter and escaped,
but since he had been detained several
months earlier on a similar complaint,
police soon seized him, and indeed,
he later admitted, I have done this
numerous times.
PERSPECTIVE
Elementary school teacher Carie
Charlesworth was red recently by
Holy Trinity School near San Diego,
Calif. with the only reason given
that her ex-husband has threatened to
kill her. W
ooPs!
Tim Blackburn, 50, fell of a ladder in Stockton-on-
Tees, England, in 2007, and shattered his arm so badly
that doctors had to remove four inches of bone and at-
tach a metal scafold around his arm that took six years
to heal completely (and then only because of help from
a cutting-edge ultrasound procedure). In May 2013
one day afer he got a clean bill of health Blackburn
tripped over his dog and tumbled down the stairs in
his home, and his arm snapped like a twig, he said.
Eco-friEndlyAdvicE
Jen Stevens | Special to the Weekender
yEs, no, And whErE to go
Erin Rovin | Weekender Correspondent
Another year and another Fourth of July is behind
us. With all of the festivities this past weekend its
time to start thinking about how to clean up and
maybe even reverse some of the damage caused on
the environment over the holiday weekend. From
reworks, traveling and barbecuing, our carbon
footprint over the last fewdays probably hasnt been
the best.
I would imagine that most people, including
myself, participated in a good old fashioned Fourth
of July cookout last weekend. Everyones prob-
ably heard how grills can sometimes put off toxins
equivalent to a carton of cigarettes. Luckily, there
are precautions we can take to reduce these types
of risks. Avoid charcoal and wood grills and instead
use propane grills to reduce air pollution.
For your next July 4th celebration, and upcoming
summer barbecues, here are a fewtips:
HCAsandPAHsarecommoncarcinogenslinkedto
grilling. HCAs formin meats and sh cooked at high
temperatures when amino acids and creatine react.
PAHs formwhen fat drips off of meat into a ame or
other heating element. To lower your carcinogenic
risk, try ipping meat more frequently while grilling.
You can also marinate meats to decrease carcinogen-
ic formations. Try trimming fat off of your meat and
grilling leaner cuts to reduce PAH exposure. While
grilling vegetables, veggie burgers and fruits might
not be as appealing for the meat lovers out there,
but its a great way to avoid all carcinogens. Another
way to greener cookouts is to purchase organic
vegetables, local, farm-raised meats, and even by
When babbling on about fashion I usual-
ly cover clothes, shoes, accessories, what
to wear when, who should wear what, but
we mustnt forget to take care of our hair,
skin, nails and overall well being. If the
rest of you is a mess, the perfect dress,
shoes or accessory wont do you any damn
good.
I found the perfect brand spankin new
one-stop spot for everything: Sorella Hair
Salon. Sorella was once located in Plains
Township, but just had a spectacular
grand opening last week for its new loca-
tion on Broad Street in Pittston in the
historical Pittston Gazette building. The
completely restored space has breathtak-
ingly high ceilings, a super spacious layout
with a classic checkered oor, fully loaded
makeup station, massage room, eight hair
stations with plenty of room, and the most
serene mani-pedi spa room with a tran-
quil-meets-frou-frou glam theme of opaque
blues and chandelier lighting.
The stylists are all fantastic and great
at giving you an updated summer look
or, my ultimate summer favorite, blonde
highlights and lowlights! Its my spring/
summer go-to look and they can do it all.
The makeup station carries Sorme
cosmetics. Applications are available by
appointment for weddings, proms, spe-
cial events or just to complete your new
look. You can also purchase the cosmetics
you like in the store. Want to amp up the
glam? You can even make an appointment
to get Minkys lash extensions that will
keep you looking fabulous sans mascara.
The massage room will put you immedi-
ately at ease with its calming, earthy color
scheme and luxe massage table. They
offer Deep Tissue, Swedish and Reiki to
name a few. W
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Grilling vegetables isnt only better for you, but for the environment as well.
July fourth follies, and howto fx them
Salon brings newlife to historical Pittston building
Relax and get your nails done in this brightly lit,
cheerful nail room at Sorella Hair Salon.
Whatever you do
* Make your summer
wardrobe pop with
a new mani-pedi,
makeup application or
hairstyle! Visit Sorella
Hair Salon at 37 Broad
Street in Pittston.
* Go aheadget
a massage. You
deserve it.
* Call and make an
appointment for
hair, nails, massage,
lashes or makeup at
570.299.5218.
* Check out Sorella
Hair Salon on Face-
book.
80008779A
simply using reusable containers.
Summertime is the peak season
for travel. Not only is the Fourth
of July weekend a busy travel time
in the summer, every weekend of
the season is. For your next sum-
mer festivity, choose a spot that is
accessible through public transpor-
tation. If youre throwing a party,
encourage friends and family to
carpool or even ride their bikes
or walk to reduce trafc conges-
tion and even improve air quality.
What about all of those re-
works? Im not going to be a deb-
bie downer right now and talk
about how much I hate reworks
because I actually really enjoy
them, but lets face it: they arent
so great for the environment. W
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It may be small, but the Ouya gaming system packs a pretty big
punch, with a load of potential for further improvements.
Holding gaming in the palmof your hand
Ouya! Its not just a fun word
to say, its a new home con-
sole. Ouya is one of the biggest
success stories of the web-
site Kickstarter. Kickstarter
is a crowd-funding site where
people can invest money in
projects from indie developers.
Essentially, people put up their
idea for a movie, game, gadget
or other project, and if you are
interested you can invest a few
dollars into making the project
happen. On Kickstarter, Ouya
raised 8.6 million and was able
to bring its console home to
hardcore gamers and people
interested in indie games.
For a while now, mobile
games have really started to
take over the game market;
however, mobile games have
never really had the quality
of home console games. Ouya
aims to change that, as it offers
an Android game experience at
home on the bigger screen.
One of the biggest differenc-
es in the games is that players
dont use a touch screen to play
them, theres a controller. It
isnt the most powerful of gam-
ing systems - not by a long shot
- but the selling point for me is
that all of the games are free
to try. You can look through
a pretty substantial line-up of
downloadable games, play the
game demo for a while, and
if you like it, pay for it. The
games range from $1 to $15.
Most of the starter games
arent very great so far, but
there are some real gems,
such as Final Fantasy 3 and
Towerfall.
One of the things that really
caught my eye when research-
ing this console is game emu-
lation; there are emulators for
pretty much every console on
the market allowing you to play
hundreds of older games from
systems like NES or SNES. You
can play pretty much any game
for those systems at any time
as long as you have the ROM
les for the game. Most of the
games I played didnt even have
a paid component; I just played
them for a while for free, which
was fun to try.
I really love the design of
the system itself. I am blown
away by how small and sleek
it is; its about the size of an
orange and ts in the palm of
your hand.
The setup is simple, the
box it comes in containing
the system, a controller and
an HDMI cable, which is all
you need to begin playing.
This is especially great for
someone who travels a lot,
as you can both pack it and
hook it up to a hotel TV eas-
ily. As long as you have an
Ethernet hookup or Wi-Fi,
youre good to go.
Another area where the
system benefits from the
use of the Android operat-
ing systems, is that you can
load apps and web browsers,
more of which will be added
as time goes on.
The system is not ideal,
but for a small price tag of
only $99 it can be a really fun
one to toy around with. Ouya
is not the most powerful sys-
tem ever, but it is made to
play smaller mobile and indie
titles. The controller isnt the
best - it feels like a knock-off
Xbox 360 controller- but it is
adequate to play the particu-
lar games the system is made
for. If you dont want to use
the controller you dont have
to, as you can hook up a PS3
or Xbox controller via a USB
cable.
The Ouya certainly isnt
a competition for Sony,
Microsoft, or Nintendo, but
it is a cheap way to play a ton
of small quirky games and a
good place to play emulated
games. Since the system is so
open, there are some really
interesting hacks and things
being developed for it, anoth-
er compelling reason to try it
out. Software updates come
out all the time and they are
constantly upgrading all of
the software.
Right now, the system is
mediocre at best, but eventually
the Ouya has a lot of potential
to do great things. The system
will not be for people who only
care about hardcore or triple A
games like Call of Duty, but it
is great if you want to try low-
budget independent games.
I really look forward to what
Ouya has to offer in the future.
-Robbie Vanderveken is the
digital operations specialist at
The Times Leader. E-mail him
at rvanderveken@timesleader.
com.
W
RIDE OF THE WEEK
Michael Golubiewski | Special to the Weekender
To submit your vehicle,
email: mgolubiewski@theweekender.com
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VIDEO GAME REVIEWS
Robbie Vanderveken | Special to the Weekender
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Weekender
Always
more
to love.
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Here comes the bride
It is every girls dream to
have her once upon a time
someday turn into a happily
ever after. A few weekends
ago, I had the ultimate joy
of watching this happen for
one of my very best friends.
After being engaged longer
than I can remember and
bringing two beautiful chil-
dren into the world, she and
her fianc finally decided
to take the leap, write the
vows, and tie the knot.
The wedding was an out-
door woodland fairytale.
All the decorations were
handmade by the bride and
groom. Every detail was so
meticulously perfect; it was
as if Nicholas Sparks had
written the scene for them.
Upon arrival, my breath was
instantly taken away. I had
seen bits and pieces of the
decor being made in the pre-
vious weeks, but seeing it all
come together was like walk-
ing into the brides personal
Pinterest board.
There was a handmade
chandelier, beautiful linens,
an archway, flower garland,
tulle and lights as far as the
eye could see. Combined
with the perfect warm and
sunny weather, it was like
something out of a Disney
movie. I was waiting for
the chipmunks and birds
to come out of the trees
and hold her veil up so she
could dance and sing a song
about finally meeting Prince
Charming.
When the time came for
the bride to walk down
the aisle, she looked more
beautiful and perfect than
Cinderella herself. The
moment I saw her and her
daddy turn towards the aisle
so he could give her away,
I lost it. My eyes welled up
and cried so many tears of
happiness that my make-up
made me look like a member
of KISS.
I have had the pleasure of
growing up with this couple,
seeing them get stronger
through the struggles, over-
come so many obstacles, and
yet their love remained ever
strong and true. It really
gave me hope to never give
up on my search for love and
happiness.
So to the happy couple,
and everyone else that is
joining in holy matrimony
this wedding season, I wish
you this: Love, may it always
be strong enough to fight
whatever storm you encoun-
ter.
Happiness, may you have
a lifetime of memories so
silly that youre laughing
with each other well into
your nineties. Finally, appre-
ciation, may you never take
one moment of this lifetime
for granted. Tell each other
how deeply youre in love
every single day. Dont go to
bed mad and, finally, always
part with a kiss, reliving
over and over that moment
when you finally hear You
may kiss the bride.
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Theres always hope for a happily ever after.
Male Musings on love, roMance, and dating
Kenny Luck | Special to the Weekender
Putting theD inD-bag
Lets face it: like it or not,
douchebags (d-bags for short)
rule the dating world.
I cant tell you how many
times Ive witnessed the prover-
bial hot chick with one or anoth-
er species of d-bag. Oftentimes,
it happens when Im shop-
pingat the mall or grocery
storeminding my own busi-
ness, and I see it: a gorgeous,
20-something young woman
will wander into my sight. All
of a sudden, time stops, and I
forget who I am and what I am
doing. She is so attractive that
her hotness will melt your face.
Then, like a hammer st to the
ribs, he appears from behind:
her man, the d-bag.
How can this be? I wonder.
How can he get with someone
like her?
The d-bag is an affront to
nature, a contradiction to
common sense, a virus to
the health of modern society.
Nevertheless, in the masculine
war over who gets the girl, in
the battle between the d-bag
and the gentleman, the latter is
losing and losing badly.
Ive spent years pondering
this subject, and Ive realized
that the d-bag ethos is com-
prised of metaphysical qualities
(attitude) and physical manifes-
tations (appearance).
I want to deconstruct the
douchebag, attempting to g-
ure out what puts the d in
d-bag. And, from what I can
gather, the d-bag essence is
made of ve things.
If you want to spot a d-bag,
heres what to look for:
1. D-Bag Attire: The tilted
hat. The bling. The popped col-
lar. The most outward manifes-
tation of douchebags, the d-bag
attire is the quickest way to ID
a d-bag in the wild.
2. D-Bag Hobbies: Most
d-bags, while lacking any innate
intelligence, tend to spend their
leisure time xing cars, drink-
ing Guinness and watching
organized sports, most notably
the NFL. D-bags recoil at any
sign of high culture, such as
lm, art and literature.
3. D-Bag Attitude:
Displaying a false condence,
the d-bag relies on this faux
brand of distorted masculin-
ity to attract girls, often suc-
ceeding, despite my disbelief.
The d-bags indifference makes
him look cool, so not caring is
a primary tool in the toolbags
toolkit.
4. D-Bag Vocabulary: Words
like Bro and Boss are signs
that youre in the presence of a
douchebag. D-bags also use non-
verbal signalsa type of d-bag
sign language, if you willrely-
ing on expressions like kissy
lips and sexually-laced hand sig-
nals to spread their douchitude.
5. D-Bag Habitat: Dance
clubs, car shows and sports
bars are among some of the
environments where the
douchebag feels most at home.
Free to interact with his fel-
low douches, the d-bag lurks in
these locations, waiting to prey
upon any unsuspecting hot-
ties who may enter. If youre a
woman, be warned: enter these
habitats at your own risk, for
its the d-bags native territorial
hunting grounds.
Douchebags, their vocabu-
lary and habitats, attitudes and
attire, are not limited to this
list. So, ladies, the next time
youre enjoying your Malibu
Bay Breeze at the bar, be on the
lookout for d-bags, their lame
pick-up lines and their insidious
motives.
W
This handy graphic is a breakdown of
the d-bag, something that may come
in handy when out and about.
JORTS
NO TASTE REQUIRED
D-BAG HAND GESTURES
GIVE EM HELL
BEATER
ONE SIZE FITS ALL ...MAYBE
CHEAP BLING
TO FIT THEIR PERSONALITY
PARTY HELMET
TILTED TO PERFECTION
TRIBAL MARKING
A TAT TO REPRESENT
THE TRIBE
LIQUID COURAGE
ONE PART VODKA
ONE PART ENERGY DRINK
TWO PARTS MACHISMO
THE GUN SHOW
PUMPIN IRON ROUND THE CLOCK
THE ANATOMY OF A
D-BAG s
tales of dating disasters
Melissa Hughes | Weekender Correspondent
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,
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Screw gimmicks. You of all people
should deplore such cheap, lame hooks.
Youve always wanted things as real as can
be, and the illusions you do indulge are for
specic, conscious purposes, like enhanc-
ing your sex life. Since attention-grabbing
tricks might have more seductive power
than usual this week, I urge you to resist
being taken in by or using them. Make
sure something is more than momentarily
captivating before you succumb to it, that
it has some solid substance behind it. And
above all, dont resort to anything so cheap
yourself. Youre about as truly intriguing
as they get. You dont need a gimmick of
any kind; dont use one.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Youre a live wire charged with sexual
energy. Its crackling from your genitals
and erogenous zones in blue electrical
arcs, zapping everyone you touch, one
way or another. Whether youre channel-
ing this profusion of procreative power
into prurience or passionately platonic
activities, its bound to rock foundations.
And when things get shaken up, unsought
rewards can sometimes tumble into your
lap, like ripe fruit from the bough. You
almost never consider ulterior motives in
matters of lust, and shouldnt now; still,
when benecial fallout results, catch it.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Youre a whirligig, a dervish, a dynamo.
Youre eminently capableyou do virtu-
ally everything quickly and well. But there
is one thing youre abysmal at: manifesting
patience. Once youve made up your mind,
you require action. To sit quietly and wait
for something is simply not in your nature;
it makes you crazy. Youre at your coolest
and most collected when youre the eye of
a tornado, surrounded by a frenzy of activ-
ity. However, since getting what youve
just decided you want cant be rushed,
read a page from the Zen book, have a ner-
vous breakdown, or take a pill: whatever it
takesjust chill out.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)
Self-contradiction isnt automatically a
bad thing. People who are able to embody
antitheses are usually fascinating. But it
can also be profoundly counterproduc-
tive: lately, youve canceled yourself out.
Your actions have been at cross-purposes.
Youre both cure and disease. Its time to
quell your astrological dissonance, and
stop needlessly splitting yourself in too
many directions. Consider the myriad
paths for not only their destinations but
the journeys they represent. Then pick
one and stick to it, so you can actually get
somewhere.
ARIES (March 21-April 19)
800 million heartbeats. Thats how
many most animals get before that unag-
ging muscle nally wears out. This can be
loosely translated into lifespans: For exam-
ple, an elephant, whose heart beats about
25 times a minute, lives many years longer
than a hummingbird, whose pulse is much,
much faster than that. However, as you
know, quantity aint quality. How many of
those heartbeats were wasted, unnoticed
and unappreciated? Since this week youre
likely to learn or recall exactly how rich
your life can be, I hope you can remember
not to settle for anything less than that for
at least ten million heartbeats.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
The astrological waste management
teamhas gone on strike, apparently. Youve
been putting your trash out to the curb,
but its just not getting picked up. That
means all the mental garbage you thought
you were rid of forever is just sitting out-
side your front door. The problem: there
is no junkyard for garbage like thisat
least, theres no way to ever truly be rid of
it. Thats not to say that you need to carry
sacks of y-ridden pestilential baggage
around with you everywhere you go, but
nor can you just dump it somewhere and
forget about it. Consider: Theres abun-
dant wealth in transforming weaknesses
into strengths. Dont think landll; think
recycling plant.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20)
Grow gills. They might help you breathe
water, a skill youll nd useful when youre
thrown out of your element into one
youve rarely, if ever, experienced before.
Its essential that you feel comfortable
there, like a frequent tourist. Although
you wont be required to ever live in that
new place, you might discover its in your
best interest to travel there, often. What is
this unfamiliar landscape, and why do you
need to visit it? Its the universes answer
to your most recent heartfelt wishes. Since
what you want lies outside your realm of
routine experience, you need to explore
new frontiers in order to nd it. You may
discover that your desires arent powerful
enough to merit this much trouble; or you
may realize that your just desserts will be
that much sweeter for the work you put
into acquiring them.
CANCER (June 21-July 22)
Forceelds cant protect you. Despite
your frequent wish that you could erect
an impenetrable, invisible barrier between
you and all harm, it cant happen. Besides,
thats not the point. You already know
that life isnt about avoiding vulnerability
and painin fact, youre only truly living
when youre open to those possibilities.
Imperviousness is isolating. Dont settle
for safe loneliness, please. There is no real
safety in the world, anywayentertaining
illusions otherwise is simply foolhardy.
The closest thing to real protection is peo-
ple you love who love you back. Howcould
you possibly nd that wonderful crowd
through a forceeld?
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)
Medieval tales, both historical and
mythical, are rife with evil advisors hold-
ing sway over weak kings. Similarly, there
are many examples of soldiers performing
acts of horrible darkness with the excuse
of just following orders. Bullst. Kings,
soldiers, and regular Joes are responsible
for their acts, even those they appear to be
ordered, blackmailed, or otherwise forced
into. Theres always another choice, even if
its not an easy one. I know you agree with
me, so dont for a second actually consider
doing anything contrary to your moral
code, no matter how its demanded of you.
Make the choice that I knowyoure capable
of: the right one.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
Every rock you throw this week will cast
down two birds, whether you like it or not.
Youre just that effective. Unfortunately,
youre not usually counting on your dou-
bled efciencyin other words you may
be surprised by what you hit that you
didnt exactly intend to. In order to cut
down on accidents, happy or otherwise,
acknowledge and plan for your exponen-
tial efcacy. You dont want to get too
much more than youre actually asking
for. Know exactly what youre aiming at.
Decide precisely which two birds your one
stone will kill, or dont throw it at all.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
One pitfall Librans often fall into, to
your own detriment, is assuming that
others are as astute as you are. Since its
easy for you to perceive whats lacking in
any given situation, you gure your own
needs are just that obvious to others.
Unfortunately, most people are hopelessly
obtusethey can barely gure out their
own tangled inner urges; others desires
are even more mysterious. This week, have
patience when your friends and lovers are
too clueless to guess at what you crave.
Yes, its sweet when youre surprised with
exactly what you want, but isnt spelling
it out in no uncertain detailand getting
itbetter than going without?
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Youre an alchemist, a synchronistic bol-
lixer, a genius mixer of disparate elements.
Whether youre taking pornographic pic-
tures with which to construct a morality
tale (drawn from your own set of enlight-
ened ethics of course, not some tired yarn
from an outdated ideology), crafting deli-
ciously obscene latch-hook rugs, or cook-
ing meals made of equal parts emotion and
actual ingredients, youre exercising one
of your greatest talents. Your other gifts
(profound compassion, generosity, and
sensuality, among many) make you a good
personthis one makes you a good artist.
Since the world has need of your particular
artistic vision, please use it as often as pos-
sible, this week and every week.
-To contact Caeriel, send mail to sign.
language.astrology@gmail.com.
W
CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS
Sofa Vergara
July 10, 1972
David Henrie
July 11, 1989
Bill Cosby
July 12, 1937
Harrison Ford
July 13, 1942
Jane Lynch
July 14, 1960
Ariana Hufngton
July 15, 1950
WILL FERRELL
(pictured)
July 16, 1967
July 15, 1950
By Caeriel Crestin
Weekender Correspondent
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Wilkes-Barre,PA 18711
For Sale By Owner
PITTSTON TWP.
RENT TO OWN
2 bedroom, clean, needs no work. re-
modeled throughout. Minutes from I-
81 & PA Turnpike. $550/month.
570-471-7175 or 610-767-9456
Land (Acreage)
NEWPORT TWP.
LOTS - LOTS-LOTS
1 mile south of L.C.C.C. Estab-
lished development with under-
ground utilities including gas.
Cleared lot. 100 frontage x
158. $35,000.
Lot 210 frontage 158 deep on
hill with great view $35,000.
Call 570-736-6881
NEWPORT TWP.
LOTS - LOTS-LOTS
1 mile south of L.C.C.C. Estab-
lished development with under-
ground utilities including gas.
Cleared lot. 100 frontage x
158. $30,500.
Lot 210 frontage 158 deep on
hill with great view $30,500.
Call 570-736-6881
Lots
WEST WYOMING
Fifth Street Manor
Two building lots in beautiful,
established development. Call
for information.
570-814-1316
Apartments /Townhouses
HARVEYS LAKE
1 & 2 bedroom , wall to wall
carpet, appliances, Lake rights.
Off street parking. No pets.
Lease, security and refer-
ences. 570-639-5920
WILKES-BARRE
Mayflower
Crossing
Apartments
570.822.3968
1, 2, 3 & 4
Bedrooms
- Light & bright open
floor plans
- All major appliances
included
- Pets welcome*
- Close to everything
- 24 hour emergency
maintenance
- Short term leases
available
Call TODAY For
AVAILABILITY!!
www.mayflowercrossing.com
Certain Restrictions Apply*
WILKES-BARRE
Studio Near Wilkes
Wood floors, parking, no pets, short
term OK. $425, all utilities included.
570-826-1934
Get all the
advertising
inserts withthe
latest sales.
Call
829-5000
to start your
home delivery.
weekender
NEPAS #1 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY
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00NUZ
PT Circulation District Associate
Must have valid drivers license and
reliable transportation.
Must be available for fexible hours in late evening and
early morning.
Please send resume to hiring@timesleader.comor to:
HR/PT Circulation District Associate
The Times Leader
15 N. Main St.
Wilkes-Barre PA 18711
A Civitas Media Company
An Equal Opportunity Employer
Apartments /Townhouses
WILKES-BARRE
PARRISH ST
Very Nice 4 Rooms + Bath,
2nd Floor. Perfect for Single or
Doubl e Occupancy Qui et
Building, Washer/dryer hook-
up. Off-Street Parking $520 +
utilities. Security. References.
Background check.
570-332-8792
WILKES-BARRE
SOUTH
SECURE BUILDINGS
1 & 2 bedroom apartments.
Starting at $440 and up. Refer-
ences required. Section 8 OK
570-357-0712
Commercial
EDWARDSVILLE
612-616 Main St.
Bring back clam night. Unlim-
ited potential in the once icon-
ic location. Space can be used
as rest aurant , (cool ers &
equipment on site) bar & grill.
Includes office and living space
the possibilities are endless!
Call agent to make an appoint-
ment and a deal.
MLS 13-2445
$84,900
John Shelley
570-702-4162
CROSSIN REAL ESTATE
570-288-0770
WILKES-BARRE
531 Scott St.
After 39 years the owner is retiring!
Turn key night club/bar, with res-
taurant potential in a PRIME loca-
tion. 2 bars with additional licensed
outside patio space. Owner is open
to creative financing. MLS 13-2446
$59,900
John Shelley
570-702-4162
CROSSIN REAL ESTATE
570-288-0770
Houses For Rent
WILKES-BARRE
Si ngl e f ami l y, 3 bedr oom,
washer/dryer hookup. Fenced in
yard. $700 + utilities & security.
570-814-7562
Half Doubles
WEST PITTSTON
Quiet street, off street parking.
2 bedrooms plus computer room,
washer/dryer hookup, dry base-
ment. NO PETS. Non-smoker.
$625/month plus security and 1
year lease.
Call Mike after 4PM 570-760-1418
Pets
YORKIE PUPPY
Female, CKC, 14 weeks.
Shots & dewormed. $600
570-436-5083
Garden & Produce
PICK YOUR OWN
BLUEBERRIES!
8 am to 8 pm
Cosed Sundays
Sickler Blueberry
Farm
Vernon
570-333-5286
NO PETS IN THE FIELD!!
Autos For Sale
Toyota 04 Celica GT
112K miles. Blue, 5 speed. Air,
power windows/locks, CD/cas-
sette, Keyless entry, sunroof,
new battery. Car drives and
has current PA inspection.
Slight rust on corner of
passenger door. Clutch slips
on hard acceleration. This is
why its thousands less than
Blue Book value. $6,500 OBO.
Make an offer! Call
570-592-1629
Autos For Sale
WANTED!
ALL
JUNK
CARS!
CA$H PAID
570-301-3602
Miscellaneous
LIKE
NEW
Used Tires &
Batteries
for $20
& Up
VITOS
&
GINOS
949 Wyoming
Ave. Forty Fort
288-8995
Motorcycles
HARLEY DAVIDSON 06'
1200 Custom Sportster
7,900 miles, excellent condi-
tion. Special seat and Chrome
accessories. $7,900.
570-510-8828
Get all the advertising inserts
with the latest sales.
Call 829-5000 to start
your home delivery.
Get all the advertising inserts
with the latest sales.
Call 829-5000 to start your home delivery.
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timesleader.com
SAVE MORE
MONEY
WELL HELP YOU
To subscribe, call 829-5000.
In a matter of weeks, you can
shave hundreds of dollars o
your grocery bill just by clipping
The Sunday Times Leader
coupons. Grab your scissors
and join the coupon craze!
Already a subscriber? Pick up extra copies of The SundayTimes Leader at the newsstand &multiply your savings!
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Sexy Lingerie
Fantasy Wear
Thigh Highs Stockings
Packaged Lingerie
Leather & Vinyl
Romance Enhancement
Essentials
M
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The Romance Store For Couples!
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Gift Certicates Available
on & Tues Noon-6 PM
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ENTIRE PURCHASE
(Excluding
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Expires 7-31-13
Wed-Thurs-Fri-Sat Noon - 8 PM
Mon & Tues Noon 6 PM
3370 Scranton-Carbondale Highway
Exit I-81 570-489-7448
80008627
Thursday augusT 1
sT
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WEEKENDER
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facebook.com/
the weekender
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Valmont-Newmark, the global leader in designing and manufacturing poles,
towers and structures for the utility markets, currently has an opening for a
qualified candidate for the following position.
Quality Assurance Tech, Level II NDT
Required experience includes:
Level I Ultrasonic
Level I Magnetic Particle
Strong computer and communications
Welding-
Capable of setting priorities and meeting deadlines
Associates degree preferred
AWS Certified Welding Inspector
Maintenance Electronic Technicians
Minimum 5 years experience with Electrical
(480 volt, Three-phase Power), Hydraulic, Pneumatic,
and Mechanical Systems.
Technical Degree and/or Professional Certifications preferred
Preferred on-job experience
Candidates must possess the ability to work in a self-directed environment.
Only Second shifts & Weekend shifts available
Welder / Fitters
Candidate must have at least 2-3 years of welding
Experience in MIG & Submerged Arc processes.
Blueprint reading is a requirement.
Welder trainees
Pre-requisite: Vo-Tech or Welding Training School.
For more details on Valmont Industries go to our website: www.valmont.com
Apply in person:
Valmont-NEWMARK
Valmont Industrial Park
225 Kiwanis Boulevard
West Hazleton, PA 18202
A drug-free workplace and Equal opportunity employer
A Civitas Media Company
An Equal Opportunity Employer
PT Drivers Needed
Must have valid drivers license and
good driving record.
Must be available for fexible hours during
late evening and early morning.
Please send resume to hiring@timesleader.comor to:
HR/PT Driver
The Times Leader
15 N. Main St.
Wilkes-Barre PA 18711
BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY
Would you like to deliver newspapers
as an Independent Contractor
under an agreement with
THE TIMES LEADER?
Call Terry to make an appointment
at 570-829-7138
KINGSTON
SWOYERSVILLE
WILKES-BARRE
LEE PARK
PLYMOUTH
WAPWALLOPEN
SWEET HUNLOCK CREEK
TRUCKSVILLE
Call Jim McCabe to make an appointment
at 570-970-7450
KINGSTON
SWOYERSVILLE
WILKES-BARRE
LEE PARK
PLYMOUTH
WAPWALLOPEN
SWEET VALLEY/
HUNLOCK CREEK
TRUCKSVILLE
LARKSVILLE
WARRIOR RUN
Part-Time Deli Positions
Now hiring Part Time Deli Clerks in all Gerritys locations.
Looking for dependable and customer oriented individuals.
Sales Commission Bonus and Employee Discount. Part time
offers flexible hours. Previous deli or food service experience
preferred, but willing to train. Apply at:
www.gerritys.com
Or apply to any Gerritys locations.
Trucks / SUVs / Vans
FORD '03 F350 XL
SUPER DUTY
DUMP TRUCK
Diesel, (330 HP, 560 pounds
of torque) auto tranny 4 door,
85,000 miles, 10 ft dump, all
wheel disk brakes, class 3
hitch, trailer brake controller,
new tires & new state inspec-
tion. cold air conditioning.Ex-
tra nice condition with no leaks
anywhere. $15,900 drives this
beauty home! 570-817-2952
Want To Buy
All Junk
Cars &
Trucks
Wanted
Highest
Prices
Paid In
CA$H
FREE
PICKUP
570-574-1275
Auto Services
$ WANTED JUNK $
VEHICLES
LISPI TOWING
We pick up
570-822-0995
WANTED
Cars & Full Size Trucks.
For prices...
Lamoreaux Auto Parts 477-2562
Computer Equip. & Software
WOMEN'S CLOTHING
PLUS SIZE, in great condition.
Coats, dress pants. sweaters.
shi rts & much more. Very
cheap. Must See! Please call
570-693-3361
Building & Remodeling
Shedlarski
Construction
Home Improvement Specialist
Licensed, insured & PA registered.
Kitchens, baths, vinyl siding &
railings,replacement
windows & doors,
additions, garages, all phases of
home renovations. Free Estimates
570-287-4067
Chimney Service
A-1 ABLE CHIMNEY
Rebuild & Repair Chimneys. All
types of Masonry.
Liners Installed,
Brick & Block,
Roofs & Gutters.
Licensed & Insured
570-735-2257
Concrete & Masonry
WYOMING VALLEY
MASONRY
Concrete, stucco,
foundations, pavers, retaining wall
systems, flagstone, brick work,
chimneys repaired. Senior Citizens
Discount
570-287-4144
or 570-760-0551
Hauling & Trucking
A.S.A.P HAULING
Estate Cleanouts, Attics,
Cellars, Garages, were
cheaper than dumpsters!.
Free Estimates, Same Day!
570-855-4588
Painting & Wallpaper
MARTY'S PAINTING
Interior & Exterior
Top Quality Work
570-468-9079
timesleaderautos.com
Find
Your
Next
Vehicle
Online.
timesleader.com
Get news when
it happens.
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BOOKS FOR CASUAL READERS
Terri Schlichenmeyer | Weekender Correspondent
Your mother loves to remi-
nisce.
Remember when she
says before launching into
some often-embarrassing story
about something that hap-
pened years ago. Remember
when, two words that make
you scramble to recall what-
ever shes talking about.
Sometimes, though, you
cant remember when. Her
stories are familiar - but they
arent, and you almost wonder
if they ever really happened.
Likewise, in the new novel,
The Ocean at the End of
the Lane, by Neil Gaiman, a
middle-aged man on his way to
a funeral learns that Memory
Lane has a dead-end.
He hadnt meant to drive
there.
He hadnt really even known
what he was looking for
nothing, probably, other than
to see what had changed in his
old neighborhood. It would be
a nice departure from funeral
conversation, a head-clearing
side-trip, but he somehow
ended up at Hempstock Farm.
Up til then, hed nearly forgot-
ten about the place.
As he walked down to the
farms pond, memories came
ooding back to him.
Lettie Hempstock (he
hadnt thought about her in
years!) had once told him that
the pond was really an ocean,
and hed believed her. He was
seven years old that summer;
she was eleven and she prom-
ised that she would keep him
safe.
But, of course, she couldnt.
It wasnt her fault that hed
insisted on going with her to
the back of her Grandmothers
property, where the wind
howled and a gray thing spoke
to Lettie in a most improper
manner. It wasnt her fault,
either, that the gray thing
threw something to him and
he caught it, even though
Lettie made him promise to
hold her hand tight.
He never blamed anyone but
himself for the appearance of
Ursula Monkton.
When his mother found a
job, Ursula Monkton moved
into his old room. Ursula
Monkton was supposedly a
housekeeper-babysitter, but
she wasnt the nice girl his par-
ents thought she was. She was
evil, she knew all his thoughts
and plans, and she terried
him. But Lettie would know
what to do about that.
Lettie Hampton always
knew
Misty. That was the rst
word that comes to mind as I
reect on reading The Ocean
at the End of the Lane. The
narrator of this short novel
seems to be oddly peering at
the past through doddering
confusion, as if somethings
foggily off-center but he cant
exactly determine what it
might be.
Odder still is that author
Neil Gaiman doesnt turn up
the heat anytime quick - which
is, I think, where the brilliance
of this book lies. No, Gaiman
lets his narrator share his
memories with curious incred-
ulousness and incredible calm,
that allows the story to wash
over readers, to overwhelm us
slowly and deliciously. Were
invited into the mist, too, and
its a squirmy thing.
For readers new to this
author, consider this: if Ray
Bradbury and Shirley Jackson
had a lovechild, it would be
Neil Gaiman. If youre a fan,
you know that already and
you know that The Ocean at
the End of the Lane is a book
youll remember.
Shrouded in murky memories,Lane unforgettable
The Ocean at the End of the Lane
Neil Gaiman
$25.99 Had an encounter with someone famous? If so, the Weekender wants
your picture for our Starstruck.
It doesnt matter if it happened fve months ago or fve years ago. Send
us your photo, your name, hometown, the celebrity you met, and when
and where you met them, and well run one photo here each week. E-mail
high resolutin JPEGs to weekender@theweekender.comor send your
photos to Starstruck, c/o The Weekender, 1 N. Main St., Wilkes-Barre, PA,
18703.
Jeff Johnson of Thornhurst, with the cast of Discovery
Channel show Amish Mafia, on APril 20, 2013 at the
Bear Lake Tavern, Thornhurst.
Enter your pet for Weekenders PET OF THE WEEK
by sending photo, pets name, breed if applicable, owners name
and hometown to: weekender@theweekender.com subject line:
Pet of the Week
Owner: JACQUELINE RUEHL
WEST PITTSTON
CHINCILLA
CHACHI
PET OFTHE WEEK
2012 MODEL OF THE YEAR
DOMINIQUE KOZUCH
SUBMIT TWO
RECENT PHOTOS TO
MODEL@THEWEEKENDER.COM
INCLUDE YOUR AGE, FULL
NAME, HOMETOWN AND PHONE
NUMBER. (MUST BE 18+)
THINK YOURE
ATTRACTIVE?
ASPIRING TO
BE A MODEL?
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