Before Twilight.

Written By; She_Is_Sky

I’ve been alive for 100 years.
The thought wasn’t the kind that takes you by surprise. I’d seen this day coming, of course, it came every
year, and now that I was a century old it wasn’t all that different from turning twenty-one.
Not that I would know what it was like to turn twenty-one.
I’d been seventeen for eighty-three years.
Now that was a morose thought.
I turned my mind away from dour facts and back on the
conversation my younger sister Alice was trying to have with me.
“So, I know we haven’t celebrated your birthday in a while, but I
think the century mark is something to celebrate.” Her pixie face
and smile were beaming up at me from her short height.
I didn’t see anything celebration worthy but I had long since
learned to not cross Alice when she wanted to do something she
considered fun.
Even right now, under that cheerful “I think the century mark is
something to celebrate” she was thinking more pointed thoughts.
You’d better not try to ruin this for me. I already bought something for you.
Oh great, I thought to myself.
She took my silence to mean I wasn’t being cooperative. She
glowered at me, “Please, Edward. Pleeeese.” She was gazing up at
me with her big topaz eyes.
Alice rarely whined and it irritated me beyond belief. I couldn’t
stand whining. She knew it too.
“Fine.” I nodded once curtly and turned on my heel to stride across
the porch to the garage.
My older sister, all adopted siblings of course, Roselie was
underneath her grandiose BMW. I could hear the twist of a wrench
as she tightened something on the engine. She was always tuning
something up about her car, making it run smoother, more fleet.
I pressed the button on my remote control keys and the silver
Volvo on the other side of the five-car bay blinked lights and horn
in one quick response.
So you let her win. Coward. Roselie thought at me jokingly as I
passed her.
“You try fighting with Alice.” I shot back short of temper.
Roselie chuckled, won’t catch me fighting with the pixie stick.
I grunted some response, whether I actually spoke or not, I don’t
recall. I slipped into the Volvo and twisted the key in the ignition.
It purred to life.
Why don’t you just run? I heard another familiar train of thought.
The voice was deep and southern. It belonged to my sister Alice’s
lover. Who was also supposedly my big brother. Realizing Jasper
was thinking at me I jerked my head around to find him. He was
perched up on the high massive oak beams of the old garage.
I shrugged.
Where are you going? Did Alice run you off again?
He could tell I was annoyed with something. He had a – gift – to
feel the emotions around him. He could even calm or provoke
through emotion, but he’d promised to not use his gifts on his
family – at least not often. Right now my expression made this one
of those times he kept his distance.
“No. And I’m just going down to the lake.” I said shortly, throwing
the Volvo into reverse against grinding protesting at my harsh
treatment.
“Hey!” Roselie reverted to using her voice to yell at me this time,
“You be nice to that car, it’s treated you well.” She scowled at me.
I ignored her and left the garage amidst spinning tires.
“What’s his problem?” Roselie’s voice followed me out as I made
a neat circle in the drive way.
“Beyond me. I think he’s tired of Esme’s pushing.” Jasper replied
in a drawling voice. It might sound like he was bored of the
subject, but he was simply being a southerner again.
“What’s the pushing?” Roselie’s curiosity was peaked.
I ground my teeth and willed Jasper to not answer her. I could still
hear them talking as I made the turn off our driveway.
“Ask her.” Jasper said, I heard the muffled thud of feet hitting the
ground as he jumped from the high beam and went to the house.
I gripped the steering wheel tightly and revved the engine into high
gear. The lake in town was the best swimming around and that’s
where I was headed now.
No, kidding, Jazz. I thought to myself. Esme was the most
wonderful woman I could ever ask for as a mother figure, but
sometimes her gentle thoughts were more then I could take.
As I had approached a century in age she had begun to worry more
and more about me. More specifically, me finding someone to
spend the next century with.
So it was no secret that I wasn’t romantically involved with
anyone. Why did that have to be a point of worry for my adopted
mother?
Today, it had been all she could think about though she’d tried to
mask her thoughts some when I was around.
More often then not I found myself wishing for something now.
Wishing that I couldn’t get into people’s heads. That I didn’t read
minds. That I wasn’t able to pick someone’s brain with my own.
But ever since the day I had woken up to this new life style with
my adopted father figure, Dr. Carlisle Cullen at my side and began
answering the questions in his head before he asked them, I’d been
a mind reader and it got in the way far too much.
My cell phone vibrated in my pocket and I debated not answering
it. Sighing I pulled it out and looked at the ID screen.
It was Emmett.
“What?” I answered.
“Hey bro, what did I do?” His booming voice carried easily to my
ear.
I rolled my eyes, “Nothing. What do you want?”
Emmett laughed, “Jazz said you were going swimming. Do you
mind company?” He quarried.
“Do you usually ask?”
Emmett wasn’t known for his courtesy of others privacy.
“No, but I figured if you’re pissed at Alice, I don’t want to hang
around you.”
I narrowed my eyes, “Why is that?”
“Awe, C’mon.” Emmett chuckled as if I should know, “You rarely
let her get on your bad side but when you do – Geez, you really
aren’t fun to be around.” He summed it up, apparently lacking
words to describe it fully.
I cracked a smile. Emmett was the best big brother I could have
ever asked for. He knew how to lighten anything up.
“Alright, alright. I’m not angry with Alice. Just life in general.
You’re welcome to come swim with me.” I said and snapped my
phone shut.
He would probably just charge out of the house and come running.
I should have, but I’d always felt a responsibility to the greater
good – to appear more human.
It wasn’t easy.
Not when you were a mind reader.
Or when you were a vampire.

CHAPTER 2
Reaching the lake I observed that there were only a few swimmers
and sunbathers on the pebbly shore. Good.
I parked my Volvo on the far side of the lake where it was deeper
and few people ventured. Striding to the edge of the rocks I
stripped my shirt off and, leaving it on a jagged rock, I dove
headfirst into the rippling water.
There was no accompanying splash to give my presence away. I
dove and swam silently and stealthily. Much like a predator
animal. A dangerous killer. It wasn’t mutually exclusive.
I was under water, swimming along the bottom of the rocky lake
when I felt a surrounding tremble of earth and land. Something like
a miniature earthquake.
Emmett was here.
I backtracked and turned my head in the water, watching Emmett
practically running on the bottom of the lake towards me. He
grinned when I noticed him.
Hey, water’s warm.
He was joking.
The water was probably chilly, since it was only May in Oregon,
but neither of us would have noticed. Icy snow and rain was warm.
The cold, pale skin of our vampirettic bodies made most things feel
warm.
I swum away, streaking through the water, feline and lithe. Emmett
yelled after me mentally, wait up!
I didn’t slow. He would catch up if he wanted to.
And he did. He raced me, burly and aggressive towards the other shore.
I threw myself into the game with abandon.
I reached the shore a full length ahead of him but when we surfaced we were laughing. His booming
chuckles were resounding.
“Race you on land now!” Emmett challenged, speeding away with a head start.
We raced full tilt along the far side of the lake away from the prying eyes of other swimmers. With his head
start he almost tied with me, but I still outran him. The race over almost four miles only lasted less then two
minutes.
“I won!” I hooted at him, fully enjoying the head rush.
“Fine! But I’m gonna get you one of these days, kid.” He grinned, clapping me on the back.
I pulled my shirt on, my jeans were dry from the run and so was my icy skin.
“Mind if I ride back with you, kiddo?” Emmett asked shaking his damp hair around.
“Are your clothes dry?” I asked absently, listening to a couple’s thoughts as they strolled close to us.
Automatically I always searched human’s minds for any sign of danger, a warning that people were starting
to suspect us. It had been a habit I formed as a protection to my family’s secret identity.
Wow. Those boys are fast runners. Wish I’d been that athletic. The man mused, no thought to the inhuman
speed. He must have seen as we slowed down nearing the Volvo.
No danger there, just more adoring humans.
I changed my attention over to the woman’s mind.
Oh gracious! Tell my why I married so young. Oh my! These boys are hot. Are they even boys, they look
like men, but oh, my! Oh, listen to my heart beating!
No kidding. I rolled my eyes. I could hear her heart beat profoundly, I glanced at Emmett, and he smirked.
She taking your shirt back off in her head?
I glowered at him with my most intense evil expression but he only laughed.
Emmett strode towards my car.
“I asked if you were dry.” I called after him.
“As you are.” He was still grinning; I could hear it in his voice.
I followed him to the car, controlling my urge to streak to the car door, I kept my steps measured, faking a
certain amount of tiredness – after all, I had just been swimming and then run a four mile race. I should
appear fatigued.
Emmett was fixing his still damp hair in the visor mirror over his seat. Leaving the lake I turned towards
the small town of Glenburn, Oregon, where we presently resided. We’d been here four years, I was
beginning to wonder when we’d have to move on.
“Why don’t we hit the laser tag alley in Portland?” Emmett suggested, “For your birthday.” He grinned.
“You just lost out.” I shook my head when he added the last part.
“Oh, that’s right. Alright, for my birthday then.”
“It’s not your birthday till fall, Em.” I glanced at him.
He threw back his head and that deep booming laughter of his filled my car. I chuckled.
“We’ll celebrate early.” Was his alibi.
I rolled my eyes and accelerated past the turn off to our drive, speeding through Glenburn to the interstate.
“Yes!” Emmett pumped his arm, “Laser Tag here we come. Not that it’s as fun as arm wrestling.” He
suggested wickedly.
“No way.” I shook my head.
He shrugged, “Can’t barely feel the high powered tags even. But it’s better then bowling.”
Bowling was Jasper’s favorite.
“I heard that!” We were only two miles from our home and Jasper’s yell floated to us.
Emmett burst into loud guffaws and then I heard Roselie’s anxious voice in my head, Wait, wait! I want to
come! Laser Tag?! And you weren’t going to stop and pick me up??
I grumbled under my breath but hit the break. The Volvo quickly braked from 110 MPH leaving town down
to crawling at about 50 MPH.
“Hey! What –?” Emmett began. But Roselie was already running towards us through the back forest area,
behind the house and she was yelling at Emmett.
“You big jerk! At least my little brother waits up for me.”
I smirked at him. Emmett groaned under his breath. When Roselie streaked out from behind one of the
boarded up houses a half mile ahead of us I sped up to reach her. She slid into the back seat and leaned
forward.
She jabbed Emmett in the rib, “Laser Tag without me?” She demanded annoyed.
“Sorry, sweetie, I wasn’t thinking.” He kept a straight face by some miracle.
Roselie put her arms around me from the backseat, embracing the seat back along with my chest, “At least
Edward is good to me.” She stuck her tongue out at Emmett.
Emmett rolled his eyes and I felt like echoing him. We both knew her run down. Rose would be friends
with anyone to get back at anyone else. And I was just a prop in her annoyance with Emmett. Roselie
wasn’t exactly my closest sister. We had more differences between us then any two beings alive, or dead, or
whatever it was we were.
But she was right about one thing. I was good to her. For my own health’s sake.
She leaned back and brushed her cool fingertips across her hair, making sure every strand was in perfect
place.
“So, Carlisle slipped up today at the hospital.” She began.
I twisted in my seat, my eyes darting to her smug face, “What?” I demanded, “What on earth do you
mean?”
“He gave a diagnose before the results came back – in an attempt to save a patients life. He thinks he’s
gotten a few of the doctors very suspicious. He needs you to come with him this evening for his third watch
shift.” She explained.
He would need me to be with him to find out if the doctors were indeed pointing fingers at him behind his
back in their mind. We’d been through this, people wondering what went on within the walls of our own
home, suspecting weird things about us. It was simple, we moved on.
But Carlisle? He never screwed up!
“For the love of all that’s holy –“ I muttered under my breath.
Emmett sighed, “This has been a pretty fun place to live, too bad we’re gonna have to move – again.” He
muttered.
Roselie snorted from the back seat, everyone in the Cullen home knew she did not like Oregon.
“Esme says we should go visit the Denali’s.” She did like that prospect. Roselie loved Alaska for some
bizarre reason. I was inside her head half the time and I even didn’t get why she liked Alaska.
“No!” I growled, “You can go, but I’m not.” I said stubbornly. Emmett glanced at me, questions written all
over his face.
Roselie laughed out loud, “Oh, come on, Edward. Tanya can’t still be in love with you.” She teased. I said
nothing, only tightening my grip on the steering wheel.
Realization dawned on Emmett’s face and he guffawed, “Ah! You’re still running from little Tanya?” He
clearly thought that was funny.
“You both have no idea.” I said through gritted teeth. When our “cousin” (for all intents and purposes) got
something in her head about a man, it was her drive and purpose to make him succumb, no thought for
anything else till she won her game. Somehow, by fate’s ill chance, I had become at the direction of her
desire.
It wasn’t like she wasn’t that she wasn’t stunning and gorgeous, even for a vampire, but I wasn’t – ah –
how to say it? Sexual active. And I planned to stay that way. I’d seen by way of example what happened to
vampires that didn’t have a mate – a partner through thick and thin, someone who altered their existence
completely – and splurged on their desires. They became succubus, much like our “cousins” were – or had
been – or perhaps still were. And clearly, going by how completely and fully my brothers and sisters around
had given themselves to the other, I knew I could never feel that for Tanya. It was an impasse and she
hadn’t been willing to accept that. When she wanted something cessation wasn’t in her vocabulary.
I’d barely escaped last time; I wasn’t going to push the limits of my control again.
Roselie wisely dropped it and began arguing with Emmett over the pro’s and con’s of water skiing.
Sometimes it still startled me how normal and average my family could be even under their circumstances.
My mind went back to Carlisle.
Why, oh, why?
Saving lives was what he did, but it had never pushed him to revealing our secret to any extent. I sighed.
Mentally I prepared myself for going to the hospital that evening. Being around so much human blood was
always a test of the self-control.

**** ******************* ********************** ****

“Let’s vote.”
“Alaska.”
“Alaska.”
“Me three.”
“Yes, Alaska. I would like to see Kate again.”
Carlisle’s eyes pinned me from the head of the dining room table,
“Edward?”
I’d gone with him to the hospital and quickly picked out the wary
imputations and censure of his fellow doctors. He’d left his
resignation papers and we’d left in a hurry. Too much trouble to
stay around and try to sort out the implications the doctors were
wondering about Dr. Cullen.
“Paraguay.” I mumbled. Anywhere far from Alaska.
Esme sighed.
“Esme?” Carlisle turned to her next.
She shrugged, “I can’t force Edward to go where he doesn’t want
to go. We can go to Paraguay for him.” She offered, always so
selfless.
I groaned. I was trying to not read her thoughts, but they were all
wistful to seeing the “dear young daughters” of her late friend.
“Alright. Alaska. But for how long?” I gripped the edge of the
table.
“Just for a visit.” Esme responded hopefully. “We can decided
where to move after that.”
“What about you Carlisle?” I asked, wasn’t he going to vote?
I’m the reason for this re-locating; I don’t have say in the matter. I will simply follow my family. I’m truly
sorry about this, Edward.
He was watching my face, telling me this without privy to the
family.
I sighed and let my hands drop from the table, “No, Carlisle, you
do have a say. How many times have we all messed up?” I
gestured around the table.
He shrugged but didn’t change his thoughts.
“We’re going to Alaska then?” Alice piped up hopefully, her lilting
voice startling me. Maybe Tanya will win Edward over this time.
They’d be so cute together. Her thoughts were singing.
I glared at her as Carlisle nodded, “Alaska it is. We’ll leave in the
morning.”
“Let’s pack!” Emmett jumped up from the table. Alice flitted up
the stairs, pulling Jasper with her.
I wandered to my room. All I cared to take with me was my music
and books, the stereo system and my mother’s jewelry case. I never
grew attached to any certain pieces of furniture since we never
used more then the cars we owned to move from place to place.
Which meant there was no room for sentimental pieces. We rarely
grew attached to anything anyway as we were always relocating
after five or so years.
Except of course Esme’s dining room table. That always had a
place in Emmett’s massive Jeep wherever we went. She would
never part ways with that table. Perhaps something like my
mother’s jewelry case was to me, that table was to her.
I slowly opened the box, lying on the top was her wedding and
engagement rings. I reverently stroked the cold bands of gold.
Admiring the stone settings. Carlisle had brought them to me after
I’d been changed from human to this monster, since both my
parents had died in the wave of Spanish Influenza that went
through Chicago back in 1907.
His thoughts were that someday I might want them to give to
someone. Someone close to my heart. Someone I would want to
marry.
He’d never voiced the thoughts out loud but he’d – what? Hoped?
– that some how perhaps it would be Roselie. But she’d found
Emmett. And I’d never been attracted in the first place.
It seemed obvious to no one but myself that I was destined to make
the most of this life in solitude.
My thoughts were slowly but surely turning morose again and I put
a mental halt to it. I was stuffing the mountains of CD’s into a
suitcase when Alice tiptoed into my room. She plopped down on
the leather couch against a far wall without being invited and
sighed.
“I’m sorry we’ve been so preoccupied this evening that you’re
birthday party didn’t work out.” She bewailed.
“I’m not.” I snorted; my back still turned to her. I was
concentrating on arranging the CD’s so that they all fit that I
almost didn’t catch her thoughts.
Ok! Everyone! “Now!” She squealed.
I spun around as my family burst through the bedroom door.
“Happy 100th Edward!” They chorused together, grinning and
holding out presents.
I couldn’t help but smile. Their faces and thoughts were so eager to
be pleasing it would physically hurt to deny them the illusion that
they were making me happy.
Jasper was watching me. With his enhanced ability’s I was sure he
could feel the stress rolling off me in waves. The depression. It
must taste bitter to him as it did to me.

**** *************** ****************** ****

Alice was suddenly stone still, turned to statue, in the middle of my

bedroom.
She’d been dancing around on her tiptoes with grace that would
make any ballet dancer envious after the rest of the family had
slowly trickled off to finish packing after deluging me in gifts and
well wishes. Jasper was still sitting on the arm of the couch
watching me. I knew he was wondering what had brought on my
mood.
My mind had been going over the pros and cons of letting Tanya
get her way.
Finally deciding it wasn’t worth it. I wasn’t going to budge an
inch.
Her eyes focused on something far away.
“Alice?” I jerked to an upright position from where I’d been
disassembling the wires from the back of the stereo.
The vision flashing through her mind was stunning. I was there –
in the vision – and someone – a girl – we were standing apart in a
dazzling sunlit meadow. Clearly my face reprised some inter
turmoil going through my soul as I stared at this girl. I couldn’t see
the girl’s face.
Then it was gone, faster then it had come.
I gasped as Alice became mobile again.
“What?” Jasper was immediately wary.
“I’ve seen something like this before. And last year…” Alice
murmured.
“What are you talking about? Was that me?” I demanded.
“You saw it yourself, Edward. Of course it was you. Or some look
a like.” She jeered.
“Where was I? That girl looked human.” There was one thing in
the vision that had left me reeling. “She – she had a heart beat –
And we were in the sunlight!” I exclaimed in astonishment.
Jasper looked between us in confusion.
“Calm down, Edward.” Alice smiled softly and pushed me down to
sit on the leather couch. “Let me tell you about the first vision.”
I was speechless. I waited while she crossed her legs and sat on the
floor in front of me.
“Five years ago I had a vision. It was the year 2000. At first I
thought it was a vision telling me what to expect with the Y2K.”
She laughed cheerfully, “But it changed quickly. There was a
human girl and you. Sitting side by side in some school. Then in a
flash of quick pictures I saw you and her – eating lunch together –
well, she was eating – and in some strange town at night – also, she
was with our family. I saw her and I together too.” She was
shaking her head, closing her eyes to remind herself of the clarity
of the vision from five years ago. I watched the memories dart
through her head.
“And you never told me about this?”
Alice shrugged, “I wasn’t sure about it. So strange…”
Jasper was staring at his lover, “A human? Edward and a
human?…” His eyes were serious then they turned joking, “Does
he eat her?” He smirked slowly.
Alice and I turned to glare at him at the same time.
He held his hands out in a pacifying gesture, “Sorry, sorry.” He
drawled.
“What were you saying about last year?” I demanded
remembering.
Alice acted as if she didn’t hear me, she held her hand up, “Wait.
Five years ago was the last time we visited the Denali’s, wasn’t it?”
She was putting things together in her head, “And now we are
again. Is that somehow connected?” She looked up at me. I saw
Tanya in her mind.
“Tanya isn’t human.” I growled through my teeth.
Alice shook her head, “No, but I think somehow that she’s
connected…” She stopped suddenly, “What were you thinking
right before the vision?”
I shrugged uncomfortably, “Nothing.” I denied.
Alice glared at me, “Edward, tell me.”
I shook my head inexorably.
“Did you make some sort of decision?” She continued, ignoring
my resisting.
I eyed her warily.
“Well? Edward, help me here! I’m trying to figure out pieces of
your life’s puzzle. You could be more cooperative!”
Finally I nodded, “Yes, I simply was – reinforcing the fact I’m not
going to let Tanya have her way.” I hated spilling my guts to them,
even though they were my siblings.
“Ah ha!” Alice deduced. Now I was nervous. “Ok, now I’ll tell you
about last year.” She nodded to herself.
I waited.
“We were planning a visit to the Denali’s. Last year, remember?
Around Christmas time. Kate was asking us to come but at the last
minute Carlisle needed to stay and work overtime at the hospital.
So only Jazz, Rose, me and Emmett went to spend Christmas with
them.”
Of course I remembered. Last year’s Christmas had been the best
in a long time. Carlisle, Esme and I alone – like it had been before
Roselie came along.
“Anyway, when you were thinking about going with us your future
was really tangled up in my head. I kept seeing flash backs of this
mystery girl you just saw in the meadow and I was seeing Tanya.
Wearing your mother’s ring.” Alice was frowning.
I choked.
“But then you decided to stay and it changed. I heard the girl’s
heartbeat and you had your arms around her. You were in a
bedroom that I didn’t recognize.” She finished slowly.
I was silent, and so was Jasper. The mood he was detecting off me
now couldn’t possibly be very encouraging. Conflicting emotions
were rolling through me till I couldn’t think straight.
Was there someone in my future after all? Someone I could hold
and love and belong to?
But she was human.
I stopped myself.
Until this moment I had never realized that some small part of me
was actually aching for that life altering instant that would change
who I was for the rest of my existence.

CHAPTER 3

[To be continued.]