A BRAND SPANKING NEW FOOTBALL MAGAZINE

www.onsidemag.com May 2009

48
Pages of
football
goodness!
goodness

IAN
ASHBEE
Hull City’s captain
on Premiership life

ALUN UEFA
PARRY EXHIBITION
Founder of Liverpool’s We spend the day
newest team at the museum

FOOTBALL THIS IS
MANAGER ANFIELD
Dean Gripton on the The home of Liver pool
popular computer game FC, but for how long?

REVIEW OF THE SEASON SO FAR

Price: £2.50

Premiership Football League European Leagues

HYPOTHETICAL SHIELD = KIT-ASTROPHE! = STICKY MCKENNA

 ADVERTISMENT

Steven Gerrard says: Drink Lucozade

Sport and you’ll run really fast
 WHAT IT FEELS LIKE
ONSIDE TO BE ONSIDE
KALLKWIK PUBLISHING,
Yes folks, it’s finally here! Issue One
LIVERPOOL CITY CENTRE, of the soon to be critically acclaimed
LIVERPOOL, MERSEYSIDE football magazine, ONSIDE!
It has taken nearly a year of gruelling
EDITORIAL production, blood, sweat and tears
Tel 020 8267 3085 Fax 020 8267 2846 (that’ll be that red stain on page 34) but
E-Mail david.segar@yahoo.co.uk we have eventually arrived at a
Editor-in-chief David Segar
Deputy editor David Segar
magazine we are sure you will enjoy on
Art editor David Segar not only a mental level, but an
Features editor David Segar emotional one too.
Designer David Segar
Onsidemag.com editor David Segar “So what?” I hear you cry. “We’ve
Staff writer David Segar already got a thousand and one football
Picture desk David Segar
Editorial secretary David Segar mags, why do we need another?” Well
Thanks to Paddy Hoey, Carly Duffen, Alun Parry, Dean my friends there is a very simple reason
Gripton, Sue Beedle, Simon Parker, James Finnegan,
Lawrence Turner and of course Ray, Dorothy and Paul
for that. All other footy mags fade into
Segar
insignificance when compared to this
one (I don’t want to oversell it, judge
for yourself). Besides if you are reading
ADVERTISING this you have already decided to buy a
Tel 020 8267 7265 Fax 020 8267 3186
E-mail advertising@onsidemag.com
copy, well done you. Unless you have
Sales director Bert the Sales Director picked it up off the shelf and are
Commercial director Sally the Commercial director reading it without paying for it, if so
Sales manager Bob the Sales Manager
Online sales manager Samantha the Online Sales- shame on you.
woman Anyway enough ego massaging, lets get
Senior display sales executive Carl the Senior fellow
Classified sales executive Randy the Classified sales on with what you will find in the debut
executive edition of Onside Magazine.
First of all we have several interview
subjects including Hull City captain Ian
MANAGEMENT Ashbee.
Publishing director David Segar
Publishing manager David Segar
FAN’S LETTERS
Licensing director David Segar
Direct marketing manager David Segar
Production manager David Segar
Assistant production manager David Segar
RAFA’S CRACKING UP!
Circulation Enquiries
Over the recent months it has become clear to me
Repro
that Liverpool manager Rafael Benitez cannot
Onside cannot accept any responsibility for unsolicited handle the pressure that comes with being near
contributions. No part of this magazine may be repro- the top of the Premier League.
duced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any He often goes on rants in his press conferences
form without permission. and cannot seem to control his urge to have a pop
at Sir Alex Ferguson any chance he gets.
Group editorial director David Segar It isn’t fair to criticize the man who is undoubt-
Group design director David Segar edly the greatest manager of all time in world
Managing director David Segar football, just because Rafa is jealous of all Sir
Chairman David Segar Alex has achieved. He should grow up and give
the Manchester United manager the respect he de-
serves. Number Eighteen will be ours this season
and we will also get to within one of Liverpool’s
European Cup wins. Come on Utd!
Alex, Manchester
RIGHT ON RAFA!
I would just like to commend Liverpool boss Rafa
SUBSCRIPTIONS Benitez on his so called ‘rant’ at Slur Alex Fergu-
son. Everything he said was fact! It wasn’t just a
Save money by subscribing random attack on someone, it was genuine facts
that people have ignored for far too long.
Call
Ferguson gets away with so much in this country
08456444111 because referees are scared of him. It is not fair
that there seems to be one rule for him and an-
other for the rest of us...I mean managers.
or e-mail: onsidesubs@ymail.com But I prefer to talk about my team. Liverpool
US subscriptions: have a great squad with lots of quality and for
732 456 4411 or e-mail sure we will be fighting United till the end.
Rafael, Liverpool
subs@britmags.com
We also have AFC Liverpool founder
Alun Parry, Football Manager
researcher Dean Gripton and England
fan Simon Parker (that’s right, THE
Simon Parker).
We also have an in depth review of the
season so far, covering the Premiership,
Football League and Europe...oh and of
course the Blue Square Premier. For
those of you who don’t have Setanta
yes it is a real league.
As if all that wasn’t enough we have the
Hypothetical Shield where Real Madrid
1960 go head-to-head with Manchester
Utd 1999, we look at the history of the
world famous structure that is Anfield,
there is a review of the UEFA
Exhibition in Liverpool and of course
we have the badly drawn adventures of
Sticky McKenna!
So what are you waiting for, get stuck
into your very first experience of the
brand new Onside Magazine...NOW!
Insert fake signature here
DOMINANCE IS BORING
I suppose I must say congratulations to England
and their elite clubs on their recent dominance of
the UEFA Champions League.
However, I for one am bored with the competition
being half made up of teams from England come
the quarter final stage every year. I want to see
Lyon v Real Madrid, AC Milan v Barcelona,
Spartak Vladikavkaz v Dukla Prague!
It is clear to me that the continuing success of
Man Utd, Chelsea, Liverpool and Arsenal is that
they have more money than most. It is unfair that
they can splash out £30m+ on a player who does
not even come from England, whereas the likes of
Barcelona and Lyon are full of players from their
own nations.
I propose we ban England from European compe-
titions until they can learn to be a bit more courte-
ous to their European neighbours by letting them
win something for a change.
Michel, France
SAVAGE TREATMENT
I am just writing to comment on the harsh treat-
ment Robbie Savage continues to recieve from
home and away fans.
I think it’s disgusting and this Welsh legend de-
serves much better.
It’s not his fault he’s such a good player, leave
him alone.
He’s lovely really, just ask his mum.
Robbie, Derby
3
 p6 Ian Ashbee
Hull’s longest serving player
talks to Onside about his side’s
debut campaign in the Premier
League.
p38 UEFA Exhibition
We spend the day at the mu-
seum and look at the UEFA ex-
hibit. It’s not just giant subbuteo
players, honest.
p14 This Is Anfield
A look at the history of one of
Europe’s most recognisable
structures, including the Anfield
tour experience.
4 www.onsidemag.com
CONTENTS
6 - Ian Ashbee
Hull City’s captain talks about life in the big
leagues and the importance of the FA Cup.
10 - Jokes Page
Readers send in some of their favourite football
funnies.
11 - Kit-astrophe!
A look at some of footballs worst fashion
crimes. Yes Coventry’s brown kit is in there.
14 - This Is Anfield
A profile of possibly the most famous stadium in
world football.
18 - Team Sheet
We put together a select XI of the worst foreign
imports to the Premier League.
19 - Season Review
A comprehensive look back on how the
2008/09 season has gone for your team.
29 - Team Sheet
Another select XI, this time of the best foreign
imports to the Premier League.
30 - Alun Parr y
The founder of non-league AFC Liverpool on
why he created the club.
 CONTENTS

p30 Alun Parry p44 Reviews

An interview with the Liverpudlian Onside keeps you up to date on
musician, but seeing as this is a the latest footy related films,
footy mag we talk about how he books and products. Including a
founded AFC Liverpool. look at ‘The Damned United’.

34 - Hypothetical
Shield
A review of a match that never happened, but
we really wish it had, so we made it up.

36 - Sticky McKenna
The adventures of Newchester Albions prodigal
son. Think Roy of the Rovers, but thinner.

37 - Fan Q&A
An interview with an England fan on Fabio
p11 Kit-astrophe!
Capello’s first year in charge.
An observation of the most vomit
38 - UEFA Exhibition inducing football kits that have
been adorned by the unluckiest
We get all cultural and visit the Liverpool of players down the years.
Museum to review the UEFA exhibition.
42 - Football Manager
Sports Interactive’s Dean Gripton gives inside
info on our favourite footy simulator.

44 - Reviews
Onside gives it’s profound opinion on the latest
football related products.

46 - Quiz
Two rival football fans go head-to-head in a bat-
tle of football I.Q’s.

47 - Stats all folks! p42 Football Manager

A collection of tables from the Premier League A look at one of the most popular
and Football League. computer game franchises, including
an interview with Sports Interactive’s
Dean Gripton.

5
 EYE OF
THE TIGER
Hull City captain Ian Ashbee on life in
the big league, the FA Cup and his side’s
chances at Premiership survival.
T
he English Premier League is made
up of hundreds of players. There
are those who have come through
the ranks of elite academies, those
who have impressed at lower league clubs
and been signed, and of course those who
have been bought in from a foreign league for
obscene amounts of money.
Ian Ashbee comes under a different category,
one which he can almost call his own. Instead
of becoming a Premiership star by one of the
token methods above, Ashbee has effectively
done it from scratch and has played with the
same team from the old division 3 right
through the football league and into the top
division.
The 32 year old joined Hull in 2002 as part of
a new look midfield being put together by
then manager Jan Molby. He has though not
just been a one team man.
The Birmingham born midfielder started his
career at Derby County where he featured just
once in a match against Southend on the final
day of the 1994/95 season. It would be man-
ager Roy McFarland’s last game in charge
and the new boss Jim Smith kept Ashbee in
6 www.onsidemag.com
Words by David Segar
the reserves for another season.
He did not make another appearance for over
a year before being sent out on loan to the
household named Icelandic team, IR
Knattspyrnudeild (yes, them). Having scored
three goals in just eight appearances in the
Icelandic league he was snapped up by Cam-
bridge United, linking up once again with
McFarland.
“ His performances
in the Icelandic
”
League won him a
move to Cambridge
Ashbee enjoyed life more at the Abbey Sta-
dium and was part of the side that won pro-
motion to the old division 2 in 1999. Despite
his goalscoring exploits abroad, Ashbee was a
key member of the U’s defence. His versatil-
ity meant he could play comfortably any-
where across the back four.
After six years at Cambridge, Ashbee was
signed up by Molby in the summer of 2002
on a three year contract.
His Hull career did not get off to the best of
starts as he was sent off for two bookings on
his debut, ironically against the same team he
debuted against for Derby, Southend.
However, Ashbee would soon be revered by
Tigers fans far and wide for his combative
tackling and accurate passing game. He was
no longer playing across the back four as he
had done at Cambridge, but had taken up a
new role as a midfield general.
Having been made captain by new boss Peter
Taylor, he scored the winning goal in Hull’s
defeat of Yeovil in the 2003/04 season. It was
the goal that sent Hull into League Two and
earned his team their first promotion in 19
years.
‘Ash’ would go on to cement his name in
Tigers folklore as the following season he be-
came Hull’s first captain to guide them to
successive promotions.
However, disaster struck at the start of their
Championship campaign as Ashbee fractured
his knee and was forced to miss the whole
season. Later it emerged that the problem was
deeper and he had an ‘osteochondral defect’.
This meant he had a degenerative bone dis
IAN ASHBEE INTERVIEW

Hull’s version
of the ‘Haka’

7
ease which affected his femur. There were
question marks over whether he would ever Bellamy attempts playing
play again. footy whilst sucking a lemon
Ashbee fought through it and made his come-
back against his boyhood team Birmingham
the following season.
He picked up where he left off and put in
some match winning performances to keep
Hull in the second tier.
In the 2007/08 season Ashbee made history.
Hull’s 1-0 playoff final win against Bristol
City saw him become the first captain ever to
lead his team from the third division right up
to the Premiership, and he had done it in just
six years.
Hull have enjoyed a mixed bag so far in their
inaugural Premiership campaign. The first
half of the season was a dream. They picked
up several impressive wins against the likes
of Arsenal, Spurs and Newcastle and were
flying high. At one point they found them-
selves in the top four and there were murmurs
of a potential spot in the Champions League,
though it’s doubtful anyone truly believed it
would happen.
Their rise to the top was almost as quick as
their plummet back down the league. From
December to March the Tigers went eleven
games without a win and were edging closer
to the relegation zone.
Ashbee believes his side have had a good sea-
son considering the resources at their dis-
posal. “We've done as much as we could've
possibly done. We've come into it (the Pre-
miership) with a positive attitude and shown
everyone that we're a decent football club and
a decent team.”
When asked why he thought the team had
started so well he stated “I think we were
probably unknown at the beginning of the cessfully competing in the Premier League.” magazine Ashbee has done since he became a
season and teams didn't give us the respect Despite Hull’s recent descent down the Pre- Premiership player, his only other interviews
we deserved.” Quizzed as to his reasons for mier League table, they have been able to coming with the official Hull City magazine.
the sudden loss of form he added “We're pick up wins in the FA Cup and now find Ashbee is one of the strongest minded players
playing in the Premier League and we're themselves in the quarter finals. The competi- in the game today, and his confident perform-
playing against quality players week in week tion has been talked down in the last few ances on the pitch are mirrored in his confi-
out. I think the form's still been there but it's years and people have argued it is not impor- dent mannerisms off it. When asked where he
the loss of results that's been the issue really. tant as the big teams do not take it seriously. thought his team would finish this season he
I don't think we've lost too much form and However, with Chelsea, Man Utd and Ever- simply answered “We will finish in the Pre-
been hammered week in week out, I think ton already in the semi-finals, Ashbee be- mier League securing our survival for next
we've just been unlucky and lost picking up lieves the magic of the cup is still very much season.”

“The FA Cup alive. “The FA cup should never be dismissed

in my opinion. It's a quality cup that's always
should never be been around. It's a way into Europe so it's
something that you should never dismiss.”
dismissed in my He added “On a priority list, would I take the
Though Hull’s excellent start to the season
has given them a helpful cushion to avoid rel-
egation, their dip in form has seen them come
within spitting distance of the likes of Mid-
dlesbrough and Newcastle. But their ability to

opinion”
results like we were early start of the sea-
son.”
When manager Phil Brown came in two sea-
sons ago Ashbee and several of Hull’s fans
were worried he might have an overhaul of
the team and appoint a new captain. However,
seeing Ashbee’s leadership qualities the for-
mer Bolton boss insisted Ashbee keep the
armband, it proved to be the right choice.
When asked what he thought of his manager
Ashbee said “Well obviously his record
speaks for itself. He came to us in the bottom
part of the Championship and now we're suc-
FA cup to staying in the Premier League?
Probably not but it certainly doesn't mean the
Gaffer won't be taking it seriously.”
In a season which has been so up and down
there have been numerous high’s and lows,
and Ashbee is in no doubt as to which are the
best and worst moments of Hull’s debut Pre-
miership season. “The best moment this sea-
son for us has probably been the Emirates
and us beating Arsenal. For me the worst
moment has got to be Wigan or Man City and
losing heavily.”
Hull’s ‘captain marvel has never been one to
seek the attention and the glamour that some
people in the game do, in fact this is the first
feature interview with a national football
shock anyone with some of their attacking
displays and resolute defending means that
Ashbee’s confidence in his teams ability to
avoid the drop should be correct.
Finally when asked where he thought Hull
would be in five years time he said “Hope-
fully Hull in 5 years time will be a long estab-
lished Premier League side knocking on the
door for Europe.”
Whether Hull are capable of getting into Eu-
rope remains to be seen, but considering the
speed they made their way from Division 3 to
the Premiership, you certainly wouldn’t bet
against them.

8 www.onsidemag.com
 IAN ASHBEE INTERVIEW

TIMELINE OF THE
CAREER OF IAN ASHBEE
A look at the career of Hull City’s longest serving
player, from Iceland to the KC Stadium.

- 6 September 1976: - May 2008:

Ashbee is born in Birmingham. Guides Hull to the playoff final
Hull’s chief scout put on alert. at Wembley where they beat
Bristol City 1-0.
- August 1993:
Signed by Roy McFarland for
Derby County.

- May 1995:
Makes his first appearance for
The Rams, it would also be his
last.
- August 1996:
Sent out on loan by manager
Jim Smith to Icelandic team, IR
Knattspyrnudeild where he
scored three times in eight
games.
- December 1996:
Is re-signed by McFarland, this
time for Cambridge Utd.
- May 1999:
Wins promotion with the U’s to
Division 2.
- May 2004:
Scores the vital goal against
Yeovil that sends Hull into
League One.
- May 2005:
Is promoted in successive sea-
sons up to the Championship.
- August 2005:
Picks up knee injury, and then
it is found he has an ‘osteo-
chondral defect’. Ashbee
misses the entire season.
- August 2006:
Makes his comeback against
Birmingham City.
- August 2008:
Ashbee is once again the cap-
tain as Hull win their first ever
Premiership game, beating
Fulham 2-1 at the KC.
- September 2008:
Plays in the team that beats
Arsenal 2-1 at the Emirates.
Hull are just the second team
to win there.
- February 2009:
Ashbee talks to Onside.

- July 2002:
Signs for Hull City on a three
year contract.

- August 2002:
Sent off on his debut for the - May 2007:
Tigers against Southend. Hull just avoid relegation.

9
Football Related
JOKES
Onside readers have sent in some of their favourite
football funnies. Here’s a selection of the best that
will have you literally wetting yourself until you have
to swim to safety, using this magazine as a float.
Over The Wall
Our club manager won't stand for any non-
sense. Last Saturday he caught a couple of
fans climbing over the stadium wall.
He was furious. He grabbed them by the col-
lars and said,
"Now you just get back in there and watch the
game till it finishes."
The Sound of Music
First fan: "I wish I'd brought the piano to the
stadium."
Second fan: "Why would you bring a piano to
the football game?"
First fan: "Because I left the tickets on it."
The Great Geordie Robbery
Police were called to St James’ Park in the
early hours of yesterday after it emerged that
burglars broke into the Newcastle United tro-
phy room and emptied it’s entire contents.
Officers have told residents of the area to
look out for a group carrying a black and
white carpet.
WAG Required
One of the highest paid players in the Premier
division, Gary had everything going for him.
He had a fancy new house in North-East Lon-
don, a flash new sports car, masses of de-
signer clothes -the lot. His only problem was
that he had three girlfriends and he couldn't
decide which one to marry. So he decided to
give £5,000 to each woman to see what she
would do with it.
The first woman bought new clothes for her-
self and had an expensive new hairdo, a mas-
sage, facial, manicure and pedicure.
The second woman bought a top-of-the range
VCR and CD player, as well as an expensive
set of golf clubs and tennis racquet and gave
them all to Gary. "I used the money to buy
you these gifts because I love you," she told
him.
The third woman invested the money in the
stock market, and within a short time had
doubled her investment. She gave Gary back
10 www.onsidemag.com
the initial £5,000 and reinvested the profit.
"I'm investing in our future because I love
you so much," she said.
Gary considered carefully how each woman
had spent the money, and then married the
woman with the biggest breasts.
Just Imagine You’re in a Wall
A famous international footballer was asked
to appear nude in the centrefold of a glossy
new women's magazine.
`Our intention is to photograph you standing
nude holding a ball" said the feature's editor.
'I see,' said the footballer. 'What will I be
doing with my other hand?'
That Was a Dive Ref!
A match between two non-League teams took
place last winter in the North of England. It
had been raining heavily all week and the
ground resembled a swamp.
However, the referee ruled that play was pos-
sible and tossed the coin to determine ends.
The visiting captain won the toss and, after a
moment's thought, said, 'OK - we'll take the
shallow end!'
A Faecal Matter
It’s half time at Wembley and England are
losing 2-0 to Holland. Fabio Capello follows
his players into the dressing room and notices
a piece of excrement lying in the middle of
the floor. The Italian shouts “Whose poo on
the floor?” to which Emile Heskey replies
“Me boss, but I’m not bad in the air”.
What’s Behind a Badge?
The Football Association was considering a
scheme for simplifying club badges and em-
blems so that they more closely reflected the
clubs' names. A committee was set up to re-
ceive suggestions and, after a few weeks, the
chairman called a meeting.
'Gentlemen,' he said, 'our request for new
club badge designs has produced a very satis-
factory response.
Most of the suggestions are perfectly straight-
forward and logical - an ox for Oxford
United, a sun for Sunderland, a heart for
Heart of Midlothian, a windmill and a brick
wall for Millwall.
However, I'm afraid we must definitely draw
the line at the proposed design received from
Arsenal!'
A Deadly Mix Up
A man walked into the office of a large Lon-
don firm and said to the manager, 'I'm young
Cartwright's grandfather - he works in your
mail room here.
I just popped in to ask if you could give him
the afternoon off so I could take him to the
League Final at Wembley.'
'I'm afraid he's not here,' said the manager.
'We already gave him the afternoon off to go
to your funeral.'
Cold Balls
An American visitor to England watched his
very first football match and was struck by
the differences between English and Ameri-
can football.
After the match he fell into conversation with
one of the English players and remarked, 'You
know, over in the States, our players wear
thick protective clothing. You guys must be
frozen stiff in those light clothes.'
'It's not so bad,' said the Englishman. 'Some-
times the ground is covered in snow.'
'You don't say!' exclaimed the American.
'What do you do about the balls? Paint them
red?'
'Oh, no,' said the player. 'We just wear an
extra pair of shorts.'
KIT-
ASTROPHE!
There have been some spectacularly bad looking
football kits worn down the years, but have they
really had an effect on the players wearing them
other than making them look silly?

11
 Scotland Pink kit 1999
When you think of boisterous Tartan Army Scotland fans in Germany for an away
friendly with their beloved Scotland, you can imagine their reaction when they saw
their heroes emerge in this ‘faded salmon’ kit. To be fair it worked as the Scots ran
out 1-0 winners. Billy Dodds, who played in the win, later said “It was dulled down
a bit by the dark blue shorts so it wasn’t too in-your-face.”

Coventry Brown kit 1978

I know what you’re thinking, how on earth could an all
brown kit not look cool, but somehow Coventry man-
aged it. The horrific looking design was the fault of for-
mer England kit manufacturers Admiral. What makes
the strip even stranger is that it had to pass approval
from several members of the Coventry board before it
was produced.
It has since become a cult figure of self ridicule among
Coventry fans, so much so that the club are producing a
special limited edition of the shirt to wear on the last
day of the current season.

Jorge Campos all kits 1991-
2004
What a legend Jorge Campos was. When people up and
down the country were asked who their favourite goal-
Hull Tiger-skin kit 1992 keeper was in 1994 most stated the Mexican shot stop-
The less said about this kit the better. Hull are per, despite the fact he wasn’t that good.
nicknamed the Tigers, so you can guess why they Campos’ self designed kits werea lot of people looked
went for this particular design. They soon forward to during the 94 World Cup, and he kept the
changed it. trend up until he retired from international football in
2004.
Oxford Utd ‘Wang’ kits 1985-
1989
Now strictly speaking there’s nothing wrong with the
design of the U’s kits between 85 and 89. They had al-
ways worn yellow and blue so it this kit is hardly a re-
bellious effort.
But it doesn’t matter how nice a kit looks, if you write
‘WANG’ on the front of anything you will look silly.
Sponsored by ‘Wang Computers’, Oxford insisted on
just emphasising the first word, silly ‘Wangers’.

12 www.onsidemag.com
 KIT-ASTROPHE!

Cameroon kits 2002 & 2004 England Grey kit 1996

I for one thought these kits were cool, but FIFA
Millions of England fans blamed Gareth
certainly didn’t. Cameroon wore the sleeveless kit
Southgate for losing to Germany on
for the 2002 African Nations Cup, but were told
penalties in the semi-final of Euro 96. It
they weren’t allowed to use it during the upcoming
has since emerged that the kit was to
World Cup. They then wore an ‘all-in-one’ kit for a
blame. German keeper Andreas Kopke
World Cup Qualifier in 2004, and FIFA were so
was laughing so hard at the shirt South-
angry that they docked them six points and fined
gate was wearing that he put him off.
them $154,000. They didn’t wear it again.

England Keeper kit 1996

If anything was going to put someone off a
penalty it was this red, purple, green, yellow
and god knows what else shirt David Seaman
was unlucky enough to wear. He was so used
to looking silly that when England brought
out a trendier keeper top he grew a ponytail
to even it up.

Man Utd Grey kit 1995
I always look at this kit and smile, because it re-
minds me of the greatest excuse in the history of
football. United were losing 3-0 at half time at
Southampton, but it wasn’t the fault of the players,
no it was the kits fault. Apparently the players could-
n’t see each other. It was quickly traded in for a blue
and white shirt. To be fair Fergie had a point, if you
relax your eyes and squint at this picture you can’t
see Ryan Giggs.
Chelsea Orange & Grey kit
1994
There’s something so stylish about the Dutch, in par-
ticular Ruud Gullit. He is so laid back and cool, wait
a minute, who’s that berk in the orange and grey?
Yes Chelsea had just started a revolution where they
were going to bring in quality technical players from
around Europe, starting with Gullit. As a comprim-
ise they had to play well whilst looking like a
mouldy piece of fruit.

13
14 www.onsidemag.com

THIS IS
ANFIELD
Onside goes to L4 for a closer look at one of
the most famous structures in the world, but
the chippy was closed so we came here.
L
iverpool’s domination of the English
game throughout the Seventies and Eight-
ies ensured that there were many glorious
days and nights at Anfield as the club’s
supporters celebrated a succession of trophies
which came to their new home on Merseyside. Fast
forward to today and that tradition is still continu-
ing, with Champions League nights at Anfield
world famous for their unique atmospheres.
It may come as a shock to some to learn that it was
Everton who first played their home matches at An-
field and had there not been a dispute over rent, the
Toffees could still be playing their home games at
the famous stadium today.
It was back in 1884 when Everton started playing at
Anfield and they continued to do so for eight years,
until a major row erupted concerning Everton’s
renting of the land. A dispute with John Houlding,
the owner of the land, led to Everton leaving the
stadium to purchase another site in the area, known
as Goodison Park.
At that time Anfield was regularly attracting 8,000
supporters for games, and John Houlding had
ploughed a lot of his own money into transforming
the stadium into one worthy of a local football
team. A small stand had been erected to house the
fans, but with Everton gone the stadium was empty
and Houlding was out of pocket.
As a result he made the decision to form his own
team to play at Anfield - Liverpool Football Club.
Their first match was played on Thursday Septem-
ber 1st 1892 against Rotherham. It was a friendly
which Liverpool won 7-1.
Following a successful first season in the Lan-
cashire League, Liverpool were granted permission
to play in the Football League and the first national
League game at Anfield was played against Lincoln
City on September 9th 1893. Liverpool won 4-0 in
front of 5,000 supporters.
Another new stand was constructed in 1903 at the
Anfield Road End. It was made from timber and
Article By
David Segar
corrugated iron.
When Liverpool won their second League title in
1906 the directors rewarded the fans by building a
banked terrace at the Walton Breck Road End.
Local journalist Ernest Edwards from the Liverpool
Daily Post and Echo christened it the Spion Kop
after a hill in South Africa where a local regiment
had suffered heavy losses during the Boer War.
The next major improvement to Anfield came in
1928, when the Kop was redesigned to house
30,000 fans. A huge roof was erected to keep the
supporters dry during the bad weather. At the time
it was the largest stand in the country. The top mast
“It may come as a
shock to some to learn
that it was Everton who
first played their home
matches at Anfield”
of the ship ‘Great Eastern’ was taken from the
breaker’s yard in Rock Ferry and was erected
alongside the Kop, where it remains today.
In 1957 Anfield had floodlights installed, enabling
the team to play in the evening. They were used for
the first time on October 30th for a game against
Everton which was staged to commemorate the
75th anniversary of the Liverpool County Football
Association.
In 1959 when Bill Shankly arrived as manager he
was appalled at the conditions and demanded the
stadium be improved. He said the ground was not
good enough for the fans who supported the team
each week.
In 1963 the board of directors agreed to spend ap-
proximately £350,000 on a new stand on the Kem-
THIS IS ANFIELD
lyn Road side of the ground. It was a cantilevered
stand able to hold 6,700 supporters. Soon after,
major alterations were also made to the Anfield
Road End as that stand too was turned into a large,
covered standing area.
One of the biggest and most exciting redevelop-
ments came in 1973 when the Main Stand was re-
duced to rubble and a new, smarter stand was
constructed in its place. It was officially opened by
the Duke of Kent on March 10th 1973 and still
stands at Anfield today.
A second tier was added to the Kemlyn Road Stand
in the early Nineties at a cost of £10m, and for the
first time executive boxes and dining lounges were
seen at the stadium. The stand was now able to hold
11,000 fans and was renamed the Centenary Stand
in celebration of Liverpool FC’s hundred years of
existence.
The biggest change of all was still to come; follow-
ing the Hillsborough disaster of 1989, where 96
Liverpool fans lost their lives, Lord Justice Taylor
had issued instructions that all top division clubs
must have all-seater stadiums - to prevent another
tragedy like it. For Liverpool this meant the end of
the world famous Spion Kop where thousands of
fanatical Reds fans turned up week after week in
support of their team.
In May 1994 after Liverpool’s final match of the
season against Norwich City, work began to demol-
ish the famous stand. A 12,000-seater stand was
built in its place. It was the biggest single-tier stand
in Europe. Many tears were shed as fans left the
Kop for the last time, and there was a dash for sou-
venirs as fans were desperate to get their hands on
any kind of memento to remind them of their times
in the middle of a noisy, swaying, flag-waving Kop.
Further reconstruction of Anfield continued in 1997
when the Anfield Road Stand was transformed into
a two-tier stand, which brought Anfield’s capacity
to over 45,000, making it the second biggest club
stadium in the country at the time.
15
Outside the stadium there have also been changes
over the years. Following the sad death of Bill
Shankly, the club decided to honour his memory by
erecting a set of wrought-iron gates with the simple
but powerful message ‘You’ll Never Walk Alone’
across the top. They were named The Shankly
Gates and were officially opened by his widow
Nessie.
Following the Hillsborough tragedy, a memorial
was constructed beside The Shankly Gates. An eter-
nal flame flickers in remembrance of the 96, whose
names are listed down two columns on the memo-
rial. Flowers and scarves are regularly draped by its
side from supporters everywhere who were
shocked and saddened by the disaster.
More recently a bronze statue of Bill Shankly has
been erected in front of the Kop Grandstand. The
statue was designed and crafted by local sculptor
Tom Murphy. It stands 7’6” high and weighs three
quarters of a ton. The message on the front of the
statue reads simply ‘He made the people happy.’
Bob Paisley, Liverpool’s most successful ever man-
ager, is the most recent to be honoured with the
opening of the ‘Paisley Gateway’ which leads on to
the Kop forecourt. Three European Cups, reflecting
Paisley’s historic achievement as Liverpool boss,
are depicted on the top of the gates while the coat
of arms for Liverpool and that for Hatton-le-Hole,
his birthplace, are inscribed on the gates.
In recent years the stadium has not had much work
on it at all. This is due to the realisation that in
order to compete financially in the modern game,
the club needed a stadium which can hold a lot
more than the 45,400 it currently does, which
meant moving to an entirely new ground.
With the surrounding area being so compact it was
not feasible for Liverpool to expand the current An-
field any further than they already have, so the de-
cision was taken to apply to the council to build a
brand new 60,000 seater stadium across the road in
Stanley Park.
The original designs revealed in 2002 recieved
mixed reviews from Reds fans. It very much resem-
bled a similar design to the one eventually used by
Arsenal to build the Emirates Stadium. With all the
stands connected to each other fans were worried
that a lack of a ‘Kop-like’ stand would detract from
the atmosphere.
When the American duo Tom Hicks and George
Gillett bought the club in January 2007 one of the
first things they did was to throw away the old de-
sign and come up with one themselves. American
architects HKS were appointed with the job of de-
The new stadium
design
16 www.onsidemag.com
signing a revolutionary football stadium that would
eclipse any other in the world, and they duly deliv-
ered.
In the summer of 2007 the new plans were revealed
and the new designs really caught the imagination
of fans and journalists alike.
“If Liverpool can obtain
a secure financial footing
then work can begin on
”
the new stadium
Like the current stadium, the new plans showed
that each stand would be individual i.e. spaces in
the corners as opposed to a bowl shape. Crucially, a
‘new Kop’ stand was part of the design, with Hicks
claiming that it would be “The orchestra to which
the players will conduct”. The design, in particular
the Kop stand, were done in mind of keeping as
much noise in the ground as possible. The steel
No idea where we
were when this picture
was taken
structure would be rounded at the back so any noise
created would just go straight back towards the
pitch.
The turf would be sunk 26ft into the ground allow-
ing room for more supporters to be accomodated
around the pitch.
The initial capacity would be 60,000, but with a fu-
ture option to increase it to more than 76,000,
which would put it on a par with Old Trafford.
The plans will also have a positive effect on the
overall area of Stanley Park, with the actual park
recieving £14m of funding.
Reds boss Rafa Benitez gave his backing to the
plans on the day they were released.
"The plans for the new stadium are absolutely fan-
tastic.
"The facilities the new stadium will provide are
going to ensure that the future of this club is a great
one and this is what the fans deserve.
"There are a lot of windows and it really is ground-
breaking in terms of stadium design."
The project was estimated to cost around £300m,
and this is where problems arose. Hicks and Gillett
realised they did not have enough money to fund
the project themselves, so took out a loan in order
to pay the first installment to get work started. The
aim being that the stadium would be open in time
for the 2010/11 season.
However, it emerged that £300m as an estimate fell
a fair way short of the reality, and when the owners
admitted the cost would be at least £100m more
than that, the realisation hit everyone that the proj-
ect would have to be delayed. The global credit
crunch has affected the plans further and as of now
there is no estimate as to when the stadium will be
built, with 2013 quoted as the earliest possible date.
The upcoming summer should iron out a few wrin-
kles in the Liverpool board room finance-wise,
with the Americans due to pay off a £350m refi-
nancing loan. If they are unable to then they will be
forced to sell the club to the highest bidder, with a
number of billionaires in the waiting from countries
such as Kuwait, Dubai, India and America.
If Liverpool can obtain a secure financial footing
then work can begin on the new stadium, but until
then fans and players alike will be more than happy
to spend a few more years at the current Anfield.
The history of the ground means that although it
may not be as big as some others, it is still consid-
ered to be one of the finest stadiums in world foot-
ball.
 THIS IS ANFIELD

THE ANFIELD TOUR AND

MUSEUM EXPERIENCE
We begin with a leisurely stroll Having enjoyed looking around the
around the outside of the ground. stadium the next step is the museum.
Everywhere you look there is a piece It holds many artefacts from the his-
of history. The first thing we come tory of Liverpool FC. As soon as you
across is the Hillsborough memorial. go through the replica of an old
It lists all the names and ages of the school turnstile, you are greeted with
96 Liverpool fans who died on that a picture of John Houlding, the man
fateful day in 1989. It will be moved who founded Liverpool Football Club
to the new ground when it is built. and owned Anfield.

On with the stadium tour now and

first of all we enter the Liverpool
dressing room. The shirts of each
member of the first team hangs up on
the pegs. There is also a physio
area, a fridge with drinks in and a toi-
let and shower area. There is a
poster on the wall reminding players
to keep their shirts on if they score.
Right next to it are the world famous There are various trophies and shirts
Shankly Gates. They are closed scattered around the museum. But
today but on a matchday you often without doubt the star attraction is the
see people walking through it just to European Cup which Liverpool won
get some inspiration ahead of a in 2005 and as it was their fifth win in
match. The proclomation of ‘You’ll the competition, they were allowed to
Never Walk Alone’ resides above it. keep it. I look a little closer and see
There is also talk the gates will be in- the dent on the handle where Milan
tegrated in the new stadium. Baros dropped it.

Next is the iconic ‘This Is Anfield’

sign. It is used to intimidate the oppo-
sition as well as inspiring the home
side. Superstitious players tap it on
their way down the tunnel ahead of a
game, believing it will bring them
good luck. As I’m busy holding a
camera I unfortunately cannot do the
same.
As well as a set of gates, Shankly Having seen trophy upon trophy, pro-
has his own statue on the other side files on famous LFC figures, and two
of the ground. Another tourist attrac- movies, one on the history of Liver-
tion on matchdays, there is often a pool FC and a documentary about
mass of people around the statue the 2005 European Cup win, we
taking photos with the great one, reach the end of our tour. The last
meaning the statement on the front, thing we see as we are about to
‘He made the people happy’, still leave the museum is a banner. It
rings true today. sums up LFC in one statement.

Out into the stadium and what a sight

it is. There are giant portable lights
on the pitch, apparently to help the
condition of the grass. We are told
we are not allowed to step onto the
pitch, but we can walk up and down
the side and even get to sit in Rafa
Benitez’s seat in the dugout. It’s still
warm.

17
TEAM SHEET
A compilation of the best and worst players of the
beautiful game. This month we look at successful
and unsuccessful foreign imports to England.
Starting with the worst because they’re more fun.
Massimo Taibi
Manchester Utd
The Italian shot stopper was
brought in to be a stalwart
between the sticks at Old
Trafford. Unfortunately he
was useless, typified by his
howler against Southampton

Kleberson J.A Boumsong Winston Bogarde

Manchester United Newcastle United Chelsea
Not strictly a defender but Was seen as the future of the The Dutchman was an estab-
given that he rarely played France defence when at lished international. Ranieri
for Utd after signing for £5m Auxerre. Impressed further decided he didn’t want him
in 2002, even Utd fans at Rangers but was an un- though so Bogarde sat out
would struggle to tell you mitigated disaster on Tyne- his contract on the side,
his position, or name. side. He now plays for Lyon. playing 11 times in 4 years..

Florin Raducioiu Juan Seba Veron Salif Diao B Diomede

West Ham United
When the Romanian forward
joined West Ham big things
were expected but he pro-
duced just 2 goals in 11
games, though one was
against Man Utd
Manchester United
The Argentinian midfielder
cost Utd a whopping £28m
back in 2001. Considering
the price tag he produced
very little before moving to
Chelsea for a meagre £15m.
Liverpool
The Senegalese midfielder
joined the Reds with El
Hadji Diouf after the 2002
World Cup. Both were spec-
tacular failures at Anfield.
Diao now resides in Stoke.
Liverpool
Another midfielder Liver-
pool signed on the strength
of a good World Cup per-
formance, Diomede only
made 5 appearances at An-
field before being released.

Diego Forlan A Shevchenko Sergei Rebrov

Manchester United
Forlan has since gone on to
be one of Europe’s top
marksmen, but at Old Traf-
ford it took him 27 games to
score his first goal for the
club, and that was a penalty.
Chelsea
When Sheva signed for
Chelsea people feared he
would destroy the Premier-
ship, he didn’t. Instead he
played half heartedly until
he was loaned back to Milan
Tottenham Hotspur
Rebrov was Sheva’s strike
partner at Dynamo Kiev, and
was just as big a failure at
Spurs as his mate was at
Chelsea. He is currently
playing for Rubin Kazan.

18 www.onsidemag.com
 PROBABLY THE
BEST LEAGUE IN
THE WORLD

Arab Billionaires, the World Player of the Year and

Rory Delap’s freakishly long throw ins. We go back
over the 2008/09 campaign and look at the highs and
lows of your team in this club-by-club analysis of the
Premiership season so far.

Including:
ARSENAL
Arsene Wenger's men have been one of the most un-
predictable teams in the league this season. One
week they'll be sweeping aside the Champions, the
next they'll be struggling to beat one of the newly
promoted sides. Wins at home to Manchester United
be able to adapt to the Premier League to make an
impact this season remains to be seen. His four goals
against Liverpool at Anfield showed his undoubted
ability, but does he have the consistency to match it?
With Arsenal failing to win a trophy in almost five
can fight off the challengers and maintain their place
in the Champions League.
Their hopes will be reliant on Aston Villa faltering
towards the business end of the season, whilst also
keeping an eye on Everton. The Merseyside club

“A few have started

and away to Chelsea have come in the same season
as losses away to Stoke and home to Hull. Finding
themselves losing grip on their place in the so called
'top 4' in the Premiership, the Gunners put together
an impressive run at the start of 2009 and have re-
mained undefeated since a 3-0 drubbing at the hands
of Man City in November.
A notable moment of the season at Arsenal was ‘Gal-
las-gate’ when the club captain William Gallas
openly criticised his team-mates. He was stripped of
the captaincy and the armband was handed to Cesc
Fabregas. However, The young Spaniards injury in
December was a huge blow and they have clearly
missed him in his absence. Although the defence
have done a good job, there is a significant lack of
creativity when Fabregas doesn’t play.
The £15m January signing of Russian playmaker An-
drei Arshavin has caputured the imagination of Gun-
ners fans all over. Whether or not the 27 year old will
have crept up behind the former Premiership cham-
pions and Arsene Wenger’s men will have to be on
their guard if they are to fight off the new pretenders.
to question Arsene
Wenger’s future. ” TOP SCORERS:
years a few have started to question manager Arsene
Adebayor - 10
Wenger’s future, with Real Madrid reportedly eyeing Van Persie - 9
up his services. The Frenchman has though stated his
intent to stay on at the Emirates. Nasri - 6
The Gunners certainly had a fight on their hands to
finish in a Champions League spot, with Aston Villa
and Everton hot on their heels. However, their recent
form has propelled them into a comfortable position
ahead of their rivals and with Robin Van Persie, Fab-
regas and Eduardo to come back from injury the fans
at the Emirates will be more than confident their side

ASTON VILLA
The big question at the start of the season was 'Could
Aston Villa break into the top 4?', and based on how
their season started the answer was, yes they could.
Their uncanny ability to win on a regular basis
showed the signs of a great team, but their record
against the other big teams has been where they have
lost points. Their only win against a 'big 4' team came
favourite to replace the Scot. But until then the chal-
lenge for him is to establish his current side as part
of the Premier League’s elite.
The impressive form of Gabby Agbonlahor and Ash-
ley Young in the first half of the season was in bal-
ance with the solid defensive performances of Martin
Laursen and Brad Friedel. Villa show a balance
sence.
Their small squad has meant they have run out of
steam in the second half of the season and are now
fighting it out with Everton for fifth spot. The Cham-
pions League looks to have eluded Villa this season
which may see captain Gareth Barry finally leave
Villa Park in the summer. However, if O’Neill can

“Villa show a balance

at the Emirates in mid November when they beat Ar- continue to build on the work he has already done,
senal 2-1. Draws at home to Liverpool and Man Utd then there’s every chance his side could be a poten-
have been improvements on previous years but their tial threat to the top four in the years to come.

which makes them

inability to take more than a point from these games
means there is still a way to go.
Something Villa have relied on this year that has set
them apart from the rest of the chasing pack has been
their knack of scoring late winners in games they
have not necessarily played that well in. Examples
such as the win against West Ham at Upton Park and
a Hull own goal in the last few minutes at the KC
Stadium showed that as well as effieciency when
they are playing well, Villa can win ugly.
Martin O’Neill has started to build quite a team at
Villa Park, though this could bring unwanted atten-
tion. Reports suggest that when Alex Ferguson retires
from his post at Old Trafford, O’Neill will be the
difficult opponents. ” TOP SCORERS:
Agbonlahor - 12
which makes them very difficult opponents for many
sides, and with the January addition of Emile Heskey Carew - 9
they looked to potentially be a major threat to the 'big
4', the question still remained though. Could they Young - 6
last?
Martin Laursen is the only major player to have
faced any significant time out, but it has had a vastly
detrimental effect on the team. Villa’s defence has
been a shadow of its former self in the Dane’s ab-

THE DEFINING MOMENTS OF 31st August 2008 4th September 2008

THE SEASON...SO FAR
It certainly has been a season to
remember. There’s been a billionaire
takeover, a newly promoted side in the
top four, and more managerial
changes than it’s possible to recall in Manchester City are taken over by the After a poor start to the season Kevin
one thought. These are just some of multi-billion pound Abu Dhabi United Keegan steps down as Newcastle boss,
the key moments that have occured in Group and straight away start splashing just eight months back into the job. He is
the 2008/09 season that will no doubt the cash, spending £32m on Brazilian replaced by Joe Kinnear, who comes in
star Robinho. Fans wrap tea towels as ‘interim manager’ until the end of the
make it one of the most memorable in
around their heads in celebration. season.
Premiership history...enjoy!

20 www.onsidemag.com
 CLUB-BY-CLUB REVIEW OF THE SEASON...SO FAR

BLACKBURN
In a topsy-turvy season for Rovers,
they finally seem to have some stabil- Ince left them in.
ity. The arrival of Paul Ince as man-
ager raised a few eyebrows in the
summer. With little
managerial experi- “The arrival of
ence and none in Paul Ince as
top flight football,
people questioned manager raised a
whether he was the few eyebrows”
right man for the
job, he wasn't.
With Blackburn languishing near the
bottom of the table and wins appear-
ing rarer than a Matt Derbyshire start, tential to push on and pull away from
the board decided drastic action had to
be taken.
Former Bolton boss Sam Al-
lardyce jumped at the opportu-
nity to get back into
Premiership management and
so far has turned the ship
around. Rovers are still very
much in a relegation fight, but a
series of draws and home wins has at
BOLTON
least pulled them out of the trouble
Being able to hold onto Roque Santa
Cruz was a massive boost for the
Ewood Park side.
Despite the
Paraguayan not hit-
ting the form he did
last season, he is
still no doubt
Rovers’ prize asset
and will be key in whether they can
stay out of the bottom three.
There is no doubting Blackburn’s po-
the relegation zone, and with an
experienced head like Allardyce
at the helm you would be foolish
to bet against them doing just
that.
TOP SCORER:
McCarthy - 9
Gary Megson's side have surprised games this season they have drawn
many this season. Bolton were a lot just five. Thankfully they have been
of peoples tip to go down at the start able to produce eleven wins, an im-
of the season, but after a good start pressive four of which have come
they found themselves in the top half away.
of the table and
“Bolton were a lot The left foot of
there were even Matt Taylor and
whispers of Eu- of peoples tip to go the head of Kevin
rope. However, a
recent dip in
down at the start Davies have
proved invaluable
form and the un- of the season.” this season with
believable close- most of Davies’
ness of the league this year means goals coming from Taylor assists.
they have been sliding down the The importance of these two players
table and in danger of being pulled cannot be measured at the Reebok
into a relegation fight. Record sign- Stadium and if the Trotters wish to
ing Johan Elmander has continue their progress they must
shown glimpses of the form hold on to them.
his £9m figure promised but
has not been the replacement
for Nicolas Anelka Bolton
TOP SCORER:
fans hoped he would be.
One of Bolton’s more remark-
Davies - 12
able stats is their seeming in-
ability to draw games. In thirty four

CHELSEA
Not since King Jose of Mourinho took charge at
Stamford Bridge in 2004 had a team ever been such
strong favourites for the title having not won it the
year previous.
When Luis Felipe Scolari was named the new
Chelsea boss in the summer many Blues fans were
relieved. Not that his predecessor Avram Grant did a
particularly bad job, he guided Chelsea to their first
ever Champions League Final and challenged Man
erpool Scolari was surprisingly sacked after just a
few months in charge. The players were reportedly
unhappy with the Brazilian’s coaching methods and
man management skills. Roman Abramovich de-
cided to call in a friend, Guus Hiddink, to take tem-
porary charge until the end of the season.
The Russian has been an undoubted success since his
arrival and has not only dragged Chelsea back into
the title race but also guided them to the FA Cup final
against title rivals this season. Having played Utd
and Liverpool twice and Arsenal once they have
recorded just one point. They still have to play the
Gunners at the Emirates but after a goalless draw at
home to Everton in mid April Hiddink conceded that
the Blues’ title aspirations were all but over.
The question remains as to whether or not the ex
PSV coach will continue his Chelsea tenure into next
season, but if he decides against it no doubt there will

“Everything was set

Utd in the title race up until late April. However, his
knack of collecting runners-up medals meant he had
to be replaced.
When Scolari came in one of his first moves was to
bring in Deco from Barcelona; and his experienced
creativity helped Chelsea play the kind of exciting
football that no-one had seen from them before.
Everything was set for Chelsea to dominate the
league and win the title by March.
However, their early promise unravelled when Liv-
erpool ended their 86 match unbeaten home winning
streak, quickly followed by Arsenal and several un-
wanted draws. Their near flawless away form was
the only reason they remained in the title race at the
halfway stage.
After away defeats at title rivals Man Utd and Liv-
be a queue of Europe’s top coaches waiting for a
chance to become Chelsea’s fifth manager in two and
a half years.
for Chelsea to
dominate the TOP SCORERS:
” Anelka - 15
league.
Lampard - 12
and Champions League semis. He has injected a new
wave of confidence throughout the team and in par- Kalou - 5
ticular has revived Didier Drogba’s influence. The
Ivory Coast striker struggled for form under Scolari
but has thrived under the Dutch manager.
If they aren’t challenging for the title come May then
people will inevitably point to their poor record

13th September 2008 5th October 2008 26th October 2008

Liverpool make the first impact on the
title race with an impressive 2-1 victory
against Man Utd at Anfield. After Carlos
Tevez gave the visitors the lead, a Wes
Brown O.G was followed by a winner
from super-sub Ryan Babel.
Hull continue their remarkable start to the
season with an away win at Spurs. A
spectacular Geovanni free kick is enough
to collect a surprise three points for the
Tigers at White Hart Lane. Talk of Europe
is rife at the KC Stadium.
Juande Ramos is sacked after just a year
as Tottenham manager. He is
controversially replaced at the helm by
Harry Redknapp. Portsmouth fans feel a
sense of deja-vu after Redknapp leaves
them for the second time.

21
EVERTON
If you had described the first two months of Everton's
season in one word it would have been 'disaster', but
having found their feet the Blues have become almost
unstoppable.
The amazing turnaround in the Toffee's season began
at Goodison Park at the end of October when they
drew with, and probably deserved to beat, Man Utd.
That draw still meant in five home games they were
yet to pick up a win, but the confidence gained from
“Having found their feet
the Blues have become
almost unstoppable.”
that performance saw them beat Fulham 1-0 in their
next home game and they have motored up the league
since then.
The Blue half of Merseyside could easily have fallen
back off the rails after an energy sapping 3-2 home
defeat in the last minute against Villa, but to their
credit they have continued their good form since that
tie in early December.
What has made their form more impressive has been
their lack of forwards, with midfielder Tim Cahill
having to play the lone striker role since Yakubu was
ruled out for the season and Louis Saha picked up his
token mid season injury. Cahill has weighed in with
the goals and Lescott and Jagielka have re-discovered
their form at the heart of the defence.
After a poor start they are back where David Moyes
has always intended them to be, near the top four and
challenging for a spot in Europe.They won’t be able
to break into the top four this season but they will be
part of the new Europa League competition next year
having assured themselves of a top six place.
The January acquisition of Brazilian striker Jo on loan
from Man City could well be one of the deals of the
season. Having moved to Eastlands for £18m in the
summer, he failed to make an impact scoring just
once in the Premier League. However, the former
CSKA Moscow player has revived his career in the
Premiership by banging in five goals in twelve games
at Goodison Park. It has raised the question as to
whether the Toffees will be making the deal perma-
nent in the summer. It seems unlikely though as no
doubt City will be looking to recoup most if not all
of the money they originally splashed out on Jo last
year.
Their success in getting to the FA Cup final is being
viewed as a sign of things to come at Everton. With
David Moyes at the helm hopes are high amongst fans
that they can break the top four within the next few
years.
TOP SCORER:
Cahill - 8
1st November 2008
On a big day for the ‘big four’ Liverpool
suffer their first defeat of the season at
Spurs. Arsenal lose at Stoke, Man Utd
win a seven goal thriller against Hull and
Chelsea smash five past Sunderland.
The title race begins to heat up.
22 www.onsidemag.com
FULHAM
The one thing you always find at the start of the sea-
son is people predict Fulham will go down. "Finally
this will be the year they go" is heard in pubs up and
down the country by wannabe Hansen's.
What often triggers this assumption is their hero-
ically dire away form in recent years. A Fulham
away win happens less often than a sighting of Hal-
ley's Comet, and so far this season that trend has
continued, although they have been able to pick up
two uncharacteristic victory’s on the road.
However, what is different this season is that under
the reigns of Roy Hodgson, they have become very
difficult to beat, with five of their eleven away
matches so far ending in draws, and five of their six
defeats have been by one goal margins. Impressive
draws at Anfield and at home to Chelsea have un-
derlined how efficient Hodgson has the Cottagers
“Hodgson has built a
good side at Fulham, with
Scandinavian defender
Brede Hangeland im-
pressing”
playing and their current mid-table position cer-
tainly does not flatter them.
The problem lies up front, with goals seemingly
very hard to come by. The summer purchases of
Andy Johnson and Bobby Zamora appeared to put
this problem to bed, but with just five Premiership
goals between them the pair have not flourished as
Fulham would have hoped. Both have suffered with
injuries this season, but the Cottagers don’t have
much back-up, with Erik Nevland scoring his first
two goals of the season in late January.
In the transfer window they lost Jimmy Bullard to
Hull City which will undeniably prove to be a big
blow to the team. Although Bullard did not provide
Fulham with the goals fans hoped he would have,
his tenacity and accuracy from set-pieces will be
sorely missed at Craven Cottage.
Hodgson has built a good side at Fulham, with
Scandinavian defender Brede Hangeland impress-
ing in his first season in England. His form has
brought some unwanted attention from the likes of
Arsenal and Man City. Hangeland has reportedly la-
belled his latest contract offer ‘derisory’ so it seems
Hodgson will have his work cut out keeping the
centre back for next season Whatever happens the
future does look bright for the Cottagers while
Hodgson is in charge.
TOP SCORER:
Johnson - 7
8th November 2008
Arsenal gain a vital win against Man Utd
at the Emirates thanks to a brace from
Samir Nasri. The defeat means Utd have
picked up just one point in matches
against their rivals this season having
drawn at Chelsea and lost to Liverpool.
HULL CITY
On getting promoted the first thing that happens is that
everyone tells you you're going back down again.
Clearly Phil Brown took this personally and decided
to do something about it. Hull had the kind of start to
a season the likes of Tottenham and Newcastle would
have dreamt of with a phenomenal start that saw them
just behind the top 4.
The form of Geovanni and Michael Turner meant they
were picking up impressive wins away to Arsenal,
Tottenham and Newcastle and home to West Ham,
Fulham and Middlesbrough. A fightback to narrowly
lose 4-3 at Old Trafford and a draw at Liverpool hav-
ing gone 2-0 up seemed to suggest this was no fluke
from the Tigers. However, their form since that match
at Anfield suggests it maybe was. Hull have obtained
just one win since the turn of the year and find them-
selves in a relegation battle going into the last few
games.
Something many pundits have pointed out as a poten-
tial turning point in Hull’s season was the incident at
Eastlands. Brown kept his players on the pitch at half
time to give them their team talk in front of the fans
after being outplayed by Man City in the first half and
trailing 3-0.
The January signing of Jimmy Bullard could have
been a crucial move for the Tigers as his experiences
in the top division with Wigan and Fulham would
surely have beeen just the tonic for Hull’s dip in form.
“Hull have picked up just
one win since the turn of
the year and find
themselves in a relega-
tion battle.”
However, he picked up a characteristic injury soon
after joining and will not play again this term.
Geovanni’s goals have dried up and coincided with
the team’s turn in fortune, and with Marlon King hav-
ing gone to Middlesbrough a lot of the goalscoring
will have to be done by Daniel Cousin. The French-
man has a knack of scoring big goals in big games,
but he needs to start scoring on a more regular basis.
Had it not been for their early season heroics they
would probably have already been condemned to an
immediate return to the Football League. Having that
cushion has helped but if they are unable to find that
kind of form again in their final games then expect to
see Hull versus Peterborough at the KC Stadium in
2009/10.
TOP SCORER:
Geovanni - 8
15th November 2008
Aston Villa show what serious
contenders they are to the top four by
beating Arsenal 2-0 at the Emirates. An
own goal and a Gabby Agbonlahor strike
gives Villa the win and sends a message
to the rest of the league.
 CLUB-BY-CLUB REVIEW OF THE SEASON...SO FAR

LIVERPOOL
What can you say about Liverpool that hasn't been
said a million times already? The Premiership is the
holy grail to the fans, and this year not only being
the twentieth anniversary of the Hillsborough disas-
ter, but also potentially the year rivals Man Utd equal
their record of eighteen league titles, Reds fans have
an impressive 2-0 win at home to Chelsea and a 3-2
comeback victory at Portsmouth lifted them right
back into the title race.
The terrific form of Utd kept the Reds at arms length,
but with the red half of Merseyside thrashing their
fierce rivals 4-1 at Old Trafford there was renewed
to play.
They have been putting together a good run of wins
towards the end of the campaign. However, a draw
at home to Arsenal looks to have maybe doused the
flames and may well have signalled the end of their
championship challenge. The noises coming out of

“When the Reds

never wanted the title more.
They started their campaign well and proved their
pedigree with rare victories over title rivals Utd and
Chelsea. Grinding out wins against lesser teams hav-
ing fallen behind also meant the points tally grew at
a decent rate, but what was noticeable was the lack
of genuinely good Liverpool performances. When
Anfield though indicate the players and staff will not
give up until it is mathematically impossible.
Liverpool will be reliant on Utd making mistakes in
routed Newcastle 5-1 their run in as well as becoming ruthlessly consistent
themselves, but if there’s one thing that will keep the
people were players and fans going it is the thought of Ferguson’s
convinced this would face if the title were to end up at Anfield this season.

the Reds routed Newcastle 5-1 at St James Park in
their last match of 2008 people were convinced this
would be their year. They were finally showing form
to go with their results.
However, in January they became draw experts, and
worse of all with teams they really should have been
beating. Injuries to key players like Fernando Torres
and Martin Skrtel didn’t help, and the quickfire sale
of Robbie Keane has seen Liverpool become a little
lightweight in attack.
After seven draws in ten games they found them-
selves behind Utd having played more matches, but
”
be their year. TOP SCORERS:
talk that they could still snatch the title away from Gerrard - 13
Ferguson’s grasp.
Torres is back in the goals after his hamstring prob- Torres - 13
lems and the likes of Yossi Benayoun and Dirk Kuyt
have upped their game recently to help out in the Kuyt - 10
Liverpool attack. Kuyt has continued his trend of
scoring goals at vital times and Benayoun has
stepped up to become Liverpool’s creative influence
when Gerrard is either having an off day or is unable

MAN CITY
This season has possibly been the most
fascinating and bizarre one City fans will have ex-
perienced. The campaign started simply enough,
winning two and losing one of their opening three
games in August. Then a sensational takeover by
move by the manager. Not filling his team with big
names, but players who have Premiership experience
can ease his side through what is undoubtedly a tran-
sitional period.
The unbelievable £100m January bid for Kaka ulti-
year they will undoubtedly be thinking a little higher.
The form of Robinho has been often disappointing
to City fans, especially away from home. A lot of
pressure was put on his shoulders given the size of
his price tag, but he has been known to go missing

“If there’s one thing

Abu Dhabi United Group on the last day of the trans- in games and has rarely shown that he can change a
fer window threw not only Eastlands, but the whole game on his own. Despite this he has still chipped in

this season has taught

world into a spin. Straight away they sent out multi-
million pound bids for world class players, even try-
ing to steal Dimitar Berbatov from under the noses
of Man Utd at the last minute.
One of these audacious bids did bear fruit in the form
with goals, hitting thirteen so far.
Lord knows what the summer will bring at Eastlands,
us about City, it’s ex- but if there’s one thing this season has taught us
pect the unexpected. ” about City, it’s expect the unexpected

of £32m striker Robinho. The Brazilian playmaker

had been set for a move to Chelsea, but the Blues un-
willingness to part with £30m+ saw City swoop in
and take him from Madrid to Manchester.
Despite this significant investment City have strug-
gled to find the form to match their finance under
Mark Hughes. In a situation any manager would
love, an open cheque book in the transfer market,
Hughes has not yet been able to build a team capable
of the Champions League aspirations the owners
clearly crave.
The mid-season additions of Wayne Bridge, Craig
Bellamy and Shay Given could prove to be a sensible
mately failed, but sent out a message to the world of
football that Manchester City are ready, willing and TOP SCORERS:
able to fight with the big boys.
It’s anyones guess as to how City will fare in the next Robinho - 13
few years, but with the January additions of Given
and Bellamy as well as the form of Stephen Ireland
Ireland - 9
and Robinho there is certainly a base for Hughes to Wright-Phillips - 5
build on.
It may be too late in the season for a run at the Euro-
pean spots, but if they can improve their away form
and gain a bit more consistency they are certainly ca-
pable of finishing in a respectable position, but next

21st November 2008 30th November 2008 4th December 2008

Arsenal’s problems mount as William
Gallas is stripped of the captaincy and
left out of the squad to face Man City
after openly criticizing his team mates
and admitting to unrest in the camp.
Cesc Fabregas takes over the armband.
The Gunners bounce back the following
week to beat Chelsea 2-1 at Stamford
Bridge. A Robin Van Persie double can-
cels out a Johan Djourou own goal and is
enough to hand the Blues their second
home defeat of the season.
Roy Keane resigns as manager of Sun-
derland. The Irishman claims the reason
is that he simply believes he cannot take
the club any further. His assistant Ricky
Sbragia takes charge for the rest of the
season.

23
MAN UTD
The Champions are once again top of the league and
look odds on to win a record equalling eighteenth
league title.
However, looking at their season it almost feels as if
the title is being won by default. They haven’t been
at their best for large parts of the campaign and have
relied on a number of late wins. The term ‘winning
stroy opposition as well as squeezing out one goal
wins. Matches where they have grabbed victory from
the jaws of defeat have seen them keep Liverpool at
a distance since they suffered defeats to the Mersey-
side club and Fulham in successive weeks.
The defence has been their main strength this cam-
paign, with Rio Ferdinand and Nemanja Vidic con-
that caused Ferguson to splash out on the former
Spurs striker. His presence has meant Carlos Tevez
has struggled for games. The question mark over his
future could be a blotch on Utd’s season as the Ar-
gentinian has signalled his intent to leave Old Traf-
ford in the summer in search of first team football in
the upcoming World Cup year.

“An uncanny ability

when you play badly is the sign of Champions’ has It is odds on that Real Madrid will rekindle their in-
never been used so often to describe Utd as it has this terest in Ronaldo in the summer. Whether or not
season. United are able to hold onto their prize asset could
A poor start to the campaign saw them fall behind to score late winners be the key to how long their dominance in domestic

has catapulted them

the other title contenders in the early running. De- and European football lasts.

feats to Liverpool and Arsenal led people to doubt
Utd's credentials and Ronaldo's inability to recapture
his incredible form from last season just went to fur-
ther these claims.
However, an uncanny ability to carve out one goal
victories and score late winners has catapulted them
above their rivals and to the summit of the Premier-
ship.
A record twelve clean sheets in a row helped mas-
sively over the winter period, with Edwin Van Der
Sar breaking all kinds of clean sheet records. A 3-0
mauling of Chelsea and a dominant 5-0 away win at
West Brom showed they still have the ability to de-
”
above their rivals
TOP SCORERS:
tinuing their form from previous seasons, as well as
Jonny Evans coming through as an accomplished
Ronaldo - 17
back up to the pair. Rooney - 12
The experience of Ryan Giggs and Paul Scholes
playing alongside the flair and talent of Ronaldo et Berbatov - 9
al seems to be the reason for Utd’s consistency.
The signing of Dimitar Berbatov was heralded as the
acquisition of the ‘new Cantona’. However, the
£30m Bulgarian has struggled to replicate the form

MIDDLESBROUGH NEWCASTLE
Showing early promise is never performing Afonso Alves has been a Like Blackburn, Newcastle's season away win all season sees them
enough in the Barclay's Premiership, disappointment to fans and the 'Down- has been hit by inconsistency in the planted firmly in the relegation zone
something Gareth Southgate knows all ing to Spurs' saga in January didn't manager's hot seat. Kevin Keegan's and in real danger of going down.
too well. An impressive win on the help with team morale. But there is no departure early in the campaign was The 5-1 humiliation at home to Liv-
opening day of the season against Tot- doubt there is heartbreak for Geordie fans who had erpool in December saw Newcastle
tenham and a per-
formance that
“erratic away form underlying quality
in the Boro side.
only just gotten
used to having “Newcastle have
reach a new low.
The manner of
deserved more has led to South- However, if the King Kev at struggled to find the defeat con-
than a late loss at
Liverpool gave
gate's position likes of Alves and
Tuncay can’t find
the helm again.
What was even any form of consis-
vinced fans that
relegation was a
people the im- being questioned” the form that more surprising tency” real possibility.
pression it would brought them to was the deci- The appointment
be a good season for the Teesiders, it the club in the first place then Boro sion to make Joe Kinnear his tempo- of Geordie legend Alan Shearer as
hasn't been. could find themselves in trouble. rary successor. Kinnear had not manager till the end of the season
Results have not gone their way and Given their difficult run in it appears managed since 2004 when he re- after Kinnear was taken ill caught
performances have not been of a high that Boro may be heading out of the signed as manager of Nottingham the imagination of Toon fans every-
enough standard. Rare highlights have Premiership. Gareth Southgate will no Forest, and his appointment where.
been an away win at Villa and a doubt come in for some criti- raised a few eyebrows, espe- Whether or not the temporary
home win against Liverpool. cism but if they do go down then cially after his curse word career change for Shearer is
However, home losses to West the players will have to shoulder filled tirade on a group of enough to keep Newcastle up
Brom, Bolton and a 5-0 ham- a lot of the blame too. There have journalist's just days into the remains to be seen, but what-
mering by Chelsea along with been too many players shirking job. Since then Newcastle ever happens the Toon Army
erratic away form has led to responsibility at the Riverside this have struggled to find any will want to forget 2008/09 as
Southgate's position being season. form of consistency, with soon as they possibly can.
questioned and Boro fans worried some impressive home form not
TOP SCORER: TOP SCORER:
about the inevitable relegation fight. being accompanied by even re-
The under- Tuncay - 6 motely good away form. Just one Owen - 8
16th December 2008 28th December 2008 10th January 2009

Less than two weeks later Keane’s old
Man Utd team-mate Paul Ince is sacked
as Blackburn manager just a few months
into his reign. A run of poor results sees
the former England midfielder replaced
by Sam Allardyce.
Liverpool make the biggest statement yet
of their title credentials by destroying
Newcastle 5-1 at St James’ Park. Goals
from Steven Gerrard (2) Sami Hyypia,
Ryan Babel and Xabi Alonso (pen) gives
the Reds victory.
Rafa Benitez launches an astonishing
verbal attack on Alex Ferguson in a pre-
match press conference. The Spaniard
accuses his rival of attempting to intimi-
date match officials at Old Trafford. The
media suggest he is ‘cracking up’.

24 www.onsidemag.com

PORTSMOUTH
Again like Newcastle and Blackburn, the story of
Pompey's season comes from the managerial hot seat.
The Fratton Park faithful had hoped that having won
the FA Cup in May, this would be their season to
break into the Premiership's top six.
A mixed start saw them collect a decent amount of
points but also receive heavy defeats to Chelsea and
Man City.
“Peter Crouch has at-
tempted to take the
goalscoring burden on
by himself”
However, on 26th October Harry Redknapp con-
firmed he would be leaving the club to take up the
vacant reigns at Tottenham, leaving Portsmouth
stranded for the second time in his career. He left
Fratton Park for rivals Southampton a few years ago.
His assistant, and former Arsenal captain Tony
Adams took charge.
There were question marks over the appointment
given Adams’ lack of experience. He endured a woe-
ful start to his first outing as a top flight manager,
winning just nine points from thirteen games in
charge.
He was dismissed in February after throwing away a
lead against Liverpool, and was replaced by the team
of Paul Hart and Brian Kidd.
Since then Pompey’s fortunes have turned around and
they have been able to pull clear of the relegation
zone thanks to some impressive home form. Hart has
turned them into a unit who are difficult to break
down, though problems still lie upfield.
In January top scorer Jermain Defoe followed Red-
knapp to Spurs and although the south coast club re-
ceived a very reasonable fee for him, it's not enough
to replace the goals they have sorely missed without
him. Peter Crouch has attempted to take the goalscor-
ing burden on by himself. David Nugent has strug-
gled to replicate his goalscoring form that saw
Pompey bring him in from Preston and Kanu has only
been given rare appearances.
The form of right back Glen Johnson has seen the for-
mer West Ham and Chelsea player earn several Eng-
land call-ups and he was named in the PFA Team of
the Year. They may have a job on their hands keeping
hold of him with Liverpool being linked with a sum-
mer move.
One thing is for sure, next season Pompey will need
stability. The managerial merry-go-round has affected
them in this campaign. Whether or
not Hart and Kidd stay on could be
the key to the clubs future.
TOP SCORER:
Crouch - 11
12th January 2009
United respond by demolishing Chelsea
at Old Trafford. In a surprisingly lacklus-
tre display from the visitors, goals from
Vidic, Rooney and Berbatov see off the
London side. People start to question the
Blues’ title credentials.
CLUB-BY-CLUB REVIEW OF THE SEASON...SO FAR
STOKE CITY
At the Brittania Stadium there has been one thing
that has stood out about Stoke City and their first
season in the Premiership, Rory Delap and his hu-
mongous throw-in.
A large percentage of the Potter's goals this season
have come from Delap launching the ball into the
box with pace and accuracy akin to a corner. So fear-
ful are teams of the mighty launch that they are will-
ing to concede a corner rather than a throw-in, as
Hull's Boaz Myhill did in their November meeting,
turning round and booting the ball behind the goal
instead of out for a throw.
Stoke’s physical style is arguably the key to their
success. Teams have struggled to contain them, es-
pecially from set pieces, and have suffered as a re-
sult. Whereas other teams around them have
attempted to play it on the floor, Stoke have utilised
their style to become solid enough to get points on
the board.
“Stoke’s physical style is
arguably the key to their
success. Teams have
struggled to contain
them, especially from set
pieces”
One of the teams tipped to prop up the table for most
of the season, Stoke have surprised some with their
impressive home form, gathering six wins from
twelve games. Wins against Arsenal, Aston Villa and
Man City as well as two draws against Liverpool and
performances that deserved at least a point against
Chelsea and Man Utd have shown the doubters that
Stoke are not in the top division to make up the num-
bers.
Despite this they remained one of the favourites to
go down, mostly because of their poor away form.
They’ve won just once in the league away from
home, picking up only seven points from a possible
fifty one on the road.
With the addition of James Beattie they finally have
a regular threat in attack who won't slap his team-
mates, as Ricardo Fuller did to Andy Griffin in an
away defeat at West Ham. They have continued their
fine home form and have pulled away from any rel-
egation threat. Pulis has worked wonders at the Brit-
tania Stadium but there have been a series of teams
who have come up and enjoyed a successful debut
season, only to go down the following year. The Pot-
ters will have their work cut out if
they want to consolidate them-
selves in the top division.
TOP SCORER:
Fuller - 8
16th January 2009
In a move that sent shockwaves through
the football world Man City made a re-
ported bid of over £100m for AC Milan’s
Brazilian ace Kaka. After several days of
negotiations and speculation the player
turns the Eastlands club down.
SUNDERLAND
Sunderland's form has been up and down more times
than a chimney sweep. Starting the season with an un-
lucky loss at home to Liverpool, followed by an im-
pressive win at Tottenham and then a three nil defeat
at home to Man City pretty much sums up their season
as a whole.
This unsteady start led to questions about how far Roy
Keane could take the club, but it was still a surprise
when the Irishman handed in his resignation at the
start of December.
It was even more of a surprise when his assistant
Ricky Sbragia was handed the reigns at the Stadium
of Light, though he set about steadying the ship and
he guided his side comfortably into mid-table.
The strike partnership of Kenwyne Jones and Djibril
Cisse has the potential to bear many goals for the
Black Cats whilst a steady if unspectacular defence
makes Sunderland one of the more difficult teams to
break down. Man Utd and Liverpool both had to rely
on late goals to defeat them and they managed a draw
with Arsenal, though Chelsea were able to put five
past them, that was under Keane's management. Two
of Sbragia's first three games saw them beat West
Brom 4-0 and Hull 4-1, which showed the potential
for the side to become a real force.
However, Sunderland’s season has gone downhill
since then and they now find themselves in danger of
being sucked into the relegation zone. A poor run of
results means that going into the last few games they
must stay ahead of their north east rivals Newcastle
and Middlesbrough in order to maintain their Premier-
ship status.
“If they are unable to
stave off relegation then
they could find them-
selves up against Roy
Keane’s Ipswich.”
Their erratic form was on show again in April when
they secured what appeared to be a vital 1-0 victory
against Hull at the Stadium of Light. However, the
next week they lost 3-0 at bottom of the table West
Brom. This kind of up and down form is the chief rea-
son they find themselves in trouble.
Chairman Niall Quinn has promised that whatever
happens Sbragia will be in charge next season and
given sufficient backing to bulk up his squad. The
question now is which division will he find that squad
playing in? If they are unable to stave off relegation
then they could find themselves up
against Roy Keane’s Ipswich.
TOP SCORER:
Cisse - 10
1st February 2009
After an unsuccessful spell with his boy-
hood club Liverpool, Robbie Keane re-
turns to Tottenham for a reported £12m.
Having scored just five league goals for
the Reds the Irishman fell out of favour
with Rafa Benitez.
25
TOTTENHAM WEST BROM
Something you can always rely on in Drastic action was needed so the Having won the Championship title Mallorca captured a lot of Albion
football is numerous football fans Spurs board not only sacked Ramos last year it was predictable that the fans’ imaginations, but the Spanish
predict Tottenham will have a superb and replaced him with Harry Red- Albion would be favourites to go midfielder has found it difficult to
year. Spurs go out
in the summer and
“with just a few knapp, they
sacked Damian down. It would be “They have be-
straight back settle to the pace of
English football.
bring in big names games to go they Comolli as well so nice to say they come known for What they needed
for big money and
have a chance of Redknapp could defied the odds playing some de- was a striker who
people assume it have complete and are pushing cent football could put the ball in
finishing in the top control on trans-
League place. Un- under Tony Mow-
will lead to them for a Europa the net on a regular
breaking the top
four. They then go
seven and in a Eu- fers. The former fortunately for bray, without the player who could
basis. The one

on to underachieve ropean spot”
and disappoint their
fans, this season was no different.
Under Juande Ramos they showed a
lot of promise towards the back end
of last season and cemented it by
winning the League Cup.
They brought in Luka Modric,
David Bentley and Roman
Pavlyuchenko among others
and they went into the new sea-
son full of hope. Fast forward
to late October and they found
themselves in the relegation zone and
losing to the likes of Hull and Sun-
derland at home.
Portsmouth boss
has guided Totten-
ham out of the relegation zone, and
with just a few games to go they have
a chance of finishing in the top seven
and a European spot.
Their performances have been
impressive since Christmas, and
with the likes of Aaron Lennon
and Tom Huddlestone playing
in sparkling form, they are
showing a lot of potential
ahead of next season...uh oh!
TOP SCORER:
Bent - 12
West Brom fans results to show for do that for them
that is not the case it.” was Kevin Phillips,
and they have who they sold to
found themselves propping up the Birmingham. Bednar has been off
table for a large portion of the sea- form and Miller has been injured all
son. season.
They have become known for The likes of Robert Koren and
playing some decent football Chris Brunt have done their
under Tony Mowbray, without best, but Albion’s leaky defence
the results to show for it. has seen them concede too
What made the difference be- many goals and they are odds
tween the legitimate fights for on to be back in the Champi-
survival that their fellow pro- onship next season.
moted teams, Stoke and Hull, have
TOP SCORER:
put up was their activity in the two
transfer windows, or lack of it. The Brunt - 7
signing of Borja Valero from Real

WEST HAM WIGAN

There have been some strange oc- stable mid-table selves for most of Wigan have quietly crept around this was called into question. Steve Bruce
curences at Upton Park this season. A the season and look to be finishing season. They are one of those teams publically lambasted him for consec-
Chelsea legend in the managers hot around the tenth place mark. who people say “Gosh I didn’t know utive AWOL’s after an international

Chelsea player is “Carlton Cole’s

seat, a former Carlton Cole’s goals Wigan were doing so badly/well”. break.
have been a surprise One minute they They sold Wilson
their top goals have been a to some cynics, as seem to be in rele- “Having been on Palacios to Spurs
gation trouble, the the verge of claim- in January for a de-
Kieron Dyer has surprise to some
goalscorer and was his call-up to the
England squad. next they are on cent fee of £14m.
been injured all cynics, as was his But the real story at the edge of a Eu- ing a Europa However, they
season...okay so
call-up to the Eng- son Upton Park this sea- ropean spot. League spot they have yet to re-in-
I guess some has been the So inevitably it ap- vest that money so
things are nor- land squad.” emergence of some pears they will fin- have fallen away” have struggled in
mal. of the youngsters ish somewhere in the middle. recent times. Having been on the
West Ham have often been associated from West Ham’s famous youth The undoubted success story at the verge of claiming a Europa League
as being a team in the middle, one of setup. Freddie Sears burst onto the JJB Stadium this season has been the spot they have fallen away and now
those clubs who always finishes com- scene last season and he has been form of on loan Egyptian striker Amr find themselves in the bottom half,
fortably between the relegation zone joined by Jack Collison and James Zaki. The FC Zamalek loanee banged though safe from relegation.
and Europe. However, in re- Tomkins this year. in a remarkable ten goals in Their success next season will
cent years it has been turmoil With Zola having just signed a the first half of the season, depend on how the Palacios
at the club with ‘Tevez-gate’ new contract West Ham fans can including a memorable brace money is spent, and whether
featuring prominently in most rest assured that they will con- at Anfield. they can hold on to their other
West Ham related headlines. tinue to be wowed by a new Of course everyone knows asset, Antonio Valencia. Don’t
Gianfranco Zola has restored style of football, good football. certain things are too good to expect to see Zaki though.
some sanity to the club and has be true, and so it proved with
TOP SCORER: TOP SCORER:
introduced a style typical of the Zaki. Not only did the goals
way the little Italian used to play up Cole - 9 dry up (hasn’t scored at all since the Zaki - 10
the road at Stamford Bridge. turn of the year) but his discipline
The Hammers have been their usual

2nd February 2009 10th February 2009 11th February 2009

Life after Keane starts well for Liverpool
as they beat Chelsea 2-0 at Anfield. After
Frank Lampard is controversially sent off
Fernando Torres scores a late double in
front of the Kop. The title appears to be
turning into a two horse race.
After a poor run of results Portsmouth
manager Tony Adams is sacked. The
final straw was a 3-2 loss at home to Liv-
erpool when his side threw away the lead
in the final minutes. Paul Hart is put in
charge till the end of the season.
One of the more shocking managerial
dismissals of the season came a day
later when Chelsea sacked Luis Felipe
Scolari. The Brazilian only took charge in
the summer, but poor home form sealed
his exit from Stamford Bridge.

26 www.onsidemag.com

CHAMPIONSHIP
BARNSLEY
The Tykes have not enjoyed the best of seasons,
with relegation still a real possibilty.
The former Premiership outfit have
been in erratic form at home and it
has cost them dear. They have lost as
many as they have won at Oakwell
this term.
BIRMINGHAM
When they came down many tipped Birmingham to
go straight back up, and they may well do just that.
The goals of Kevin Phillips have helped but it has
been their solid defence which have won them the
majority of their points. Liam Ridgewell and Maik
Taylor have won more MOTM awards than anyone
else at St Andrews this season.
BLACKPOOL
There weren’t many expectations at Bloomfield
Road this season but Blackpool have steadily gone
along and although they find themselves in the bot-
tom half, they are well clear of the relegation zone.
Like Barnsley, their poor home form has been a
problem, with five wins and ten defeats meaning
they are actually better away.
BRISTOL CITY
Hopes were high at Ashton Gate at the start of the
season. Having just missed out on promotion the
previous year, losing to Hull in the playoff final,
City fans expected their team to at least equal that
feat. It has not turned out that way and they cur-
rently find themselves twelve points off the playoff
spots.
BURNLEY
Most of the main stories at Turf Moor this year
have been related to their form in the
two main cup competitions, nearly
making the League Cup Final. How-
ever, they have also impressed in the
league and thanks to an heroic team
effort are well on course for a playoff place.
CARDIFF
The Welsh side have had a terrific year. Another
team who had high hopes after their FA Cup Final
appearance last season, Cardiff have pushed on and
appear on course for a place in the playoffs. The
goals from Ross McCormack have propelled The
Bluebirds up the table. Promotion will be a fine
send off in their last season at Ninian Park.
CHARLTON
Well, what a disaster this season has been for the
Addicks. Some were tipping them for promotion
under boss Alan Pardew, but things have gone from
bad to worse and their relegation to League One
has already beed confirmed. They will be hoping
they can emulate Leicester and come straight back
up, but nothing’s for sure in this game.
COVENTRY
The Sky Blues have not enjoyed the best of seasons
under Chris Coleman, and there were fears of rele-
gation at one stage. Their inability to turn the Ricoh
Arena into a fortress has been a worry, winning
eight and losing seven of their home games this
term. No doubt the club have the potential to return
to the big time, but can Coleman bring it out?
CLUB-BY-CLUB REVIEW OF THE SEASON...SO FAR
CRYSTAL PALACE QPR
When it comes to Neil Warnock you can never tell
what is going to happen next. His outspoken ways
have often landed him in hot water with the FA, but
there is no denying he has a lot of managerial abil-
ity. His success at Sheffield Utd led people to as-
sume he would get Palace up this season, but as it
is they have languished in mid-table all year.
DERBY
Let’s face it, Derby were embarrassed in the Pre-
mier League last season. So bad were they that they
were one of the favourites to go down
this season too. As it is they have
steered clear of the drop and under
new boss Nigel Clough they’ll have
higher hopes for next year.
DONCASTER
Having drawn only seven games all season, Don-
caster are known as one of the more exciting teams
to watch in the division. They play some pretty
football on the floor and entertain the crowd.
What’s so interesting about watching them is that
you never know whether their style will pay off,
their mid-table status suggests it’s about 50-50.
IPSWICH
There have been strange goings on at Portman
Road this season. Last year they were brilliant at
home and useless away. This term they have been
the exact opposite. Missing out on the playoffs was
not acceptable to the board, so Jim Magilton was
dismissed with just two games left and replaced by
Roy Keane. Big things are expected next term.
NORWICH
A very disappointing campaign at Carrow Road
could see them relegated to the third tier of English
football. Uncertainty in the dugout has been a big
problem, with Glenn Roeder especially experienc-
ing troubles. Bryan Gunn has tried to steer them
away but they’ve ended up in a worse position than
before. Canaries fans will not be happy.
NOTTINGHAM F
The former European Champions were on the up,
promoted back into the Championship and as far as
Forest fans were concerned it was just a step on the
way back to the top league. It hasn’t worked out
that way and Forest have been teetering on the
brink of the relegation zone all season. They should
have enough to stay up though.
PLYMOUTH
Argyle started the season fairly well. A darkhorse in
the league, the south-west club looked like they
were in with a shout of a playoff place
after a month or so. They have fallen
since then and find themselves near
the bottom. The goals of Paul Gal-
lagher have been important.
PRESTON
Preston have been threatening to do something for
a while. Always in and around the playoffs but
never getting through them, North End are once
again in with a chance of going up. It seems a fight
between themselves, Cardiff and rivals Burnley for
who will get the last places, but whatever happens
no doubt they’ll be there again next season.
The rich boys of the division, many people were
expecting QPR to bring in Kaka, Ronaldo and Ger-
rard and run away with the league. They didn’t and
they haven’t. Getting through three managers du-
rung the season, Flavio Briatore still has a lot to do
at Loftus Road, as Rangers’ mid-table finish will
suggest.
READING
Like Birmingham, Reading were expected to have
enough to come straight back up. However, a poor
start looked to have put paid to that.
They have fought back gradually since
and have an outside chance of a top
two finish. If not they will certainly be
favourites for the playoffs.
SHEFF UTD
A very impressive season at Bramall Lane looks
like it could well end in joy as the club who felt
they were robbed of their Premiership status by the
‘Carlos Tevez’ saga could go back up. They are
fighting it out with Birmingham and Reading and
will fancy their chances as their rivals play each
other on the final day.
SHEFF WED
A fairly standard season at Hillsborough, they have
never really threatened at either end of the table.
Marcus Tudgay has kept the goals flowing which
has kept them ahead of the relegation fight. They
have been impressive at home, lacklustre away and
will finish somewhere in mid-table. All in all a
fairly dull season really.
SOUTHAMPTON
It has certainly not been dull at St Mary’s though,
for all the wrong reasons. They have struggled on
the pitch as well as off it and have just been pun-
ished for going into administration. Having also
been officially relegated their ten point penalty will
not come into effect till next season. Saints fans are
praying for a consortium to buy the club.
SWANSEA
As said earlier, Doncaster play some nice football,
but not compared to Swansea. Roberto Martinez
has installed a European style of passing and mov-
ing at pace which has made The Swans a difficult
opponent for many teams. They’ll just miss out on
the playoffs but it’s been a very impressive debut
season in the Championship.
WATFORD
Under Aidy Boothroyd, Watford had hoped to be
promotion candidates. After he left though expecta-
tions were lowered and rightly so. Watford have
found themselves close to the relegation zone all
season and have only just managed to pull away.
It’s anyones guess how they’ll fare next year but
the potential is certainly there.
WOLVES
Saving the best for last, Wolves have been out-
standing this season and have already confirmed
themselves as Champions. Mick Mc-
Carthy has put a terrific young team to-
gether at Molineux and with the likes
of Kightly and Ebanks-Blake on board,
Premiership watch out!
27
LEAGUE ONE
Two teams have already managed to
get out of League One at the right end
with games to spare. What makes it
interesting is that neither one was in
the division last season and were two
leagues apart this time last year.
When Leicester came down it was
somewhat of a surprise. Another club
that thought they were too big to
come down but weren’t.
Fans at the Walkers Sta-
dium weren’t happy but
had faith that the newly
appointed boss Nigel
Pearson would be able
to guide them back up
straight away, and so it
proved.
The former Middles-
brough defender has
built a solid team at
Leicester and despite an
indifferent start they
went top around Christmas time and
never looked back.
Joining them in the Championship
will be Peterborough, who have en-
joyed successive promotions under
‘Sir Alex Junior’, Darren Ferguson.
Boro have hardly been a bastion of
consistency but their never say die at-
titude and ability to score all kinds of
goals has been too much for some of
their opponents. Craig Mackail-Smith,
Aaron McLean and George Boyd
CONFERENCE
The Blue Square Premier always
promised to provide an interesting
season, with around half the league
made up of former Football League
teams.
The likes of Wrexham, Mansfield,
York, Oxford, Cambridge, Torquay
etc. were expected to lead the pack
from first to last, it didn’t happen.
The surprise package
this season was Burton
Albion, led at the start
by Nigel Clough. Al-
though no-one ran
away with the league in
the first few months, it
was Burton who finally
broke free and put to-
gether a run of wins
that would take them
nearly twenty points
clear at the top. That
cushion would prove to
be decisive.
A number of other teams started well
and some unlikely clubs took up the
top spots. The likes of Histon, Craw-
ley and Salisbury were somehow out-
muscling their more prestigious
counterparts and showing that money
isn’t everything at this level. Salisbury
and Crawley eventually ran out of
steam and fell away, but Histon kept
on going and have deservedy got
themselves a playoff place.
28 www.onsidemag.com
have all been scouted by Premier
League clubs, but given Posh’s suc-
cess they may not need to leave in
order to experience top flight football.
At the other end of the table we have
lost Hereford and Cheltenham, with
Crewe and Carlisle expected to fol-
low. No-one has really been the whip-
ping boys of the division, but to be
fair all four of these
sides knew they would
struggle this season,
with the possible excep-
tion of Crewe.
Leeds were the bookies
favourites at the start of
the season but have
been thwarted in their
attempt at automatic
promotion. On a
brighter note Jermaine
Beckford has continued
to find the net at Elland
Road, but he has been outshone this
campaign by Swindon’s Simon Cox
and Bristol Rover’s Richie Lambert,
who have scored an impressive 27
and 28 goals respectively.
The playoffs will be made up of
Leeds, Millwall, MK Dons and either
Scunthorpe or Tranmere, with the lat-
ter two playing each other on the last
day of the season. Call it a coinci-
dence, but Scunthorpe will be the
favourites to grab the last spot.
On a sidenote Mansfield, Crawley and
Oxford were all hit with points deduc-
tions for improper registrations of
players. All the clubs were outraged
and it led to an internal enquiry.
Toward the latter part of the season
Burton lost Clough to Derby, and their
results soon showed his influence.
They began dropping points all over
the place and the chas-
ing pack smelt blood in
the water.
On the last day of the
season Burton needed to
get at least a point at
Torquay to be crowned
Champions. They lost,
but luckily for them
Cambridge failed to beat
Altrincham so Albion
went up anyway for the
first time ever.
The relegation spots
were filled by Lewes, Northwich,
Woking and the unlucky Weymouth.
They went bankrupt and lost all their
players in February. Needless to say
they didn’t pick up any points fielding
their youth team.
The playoff places have been filled by
Histon, Cambridge, Stevenage and
Torquay. Histon will be the underdogs
but if there’s one thing you can rely
on about the Conference it’s an
essence of unpredictability.
LEAGUE TWO
It has been a fascinating season at the
summit of League Two this year, but
the big stories have been at the other
end of the table.
In a division where there are only two
relegation spots it was quite a thing
when it was announced at the start of
the season that three sides would be
starting on minus points. Both Rother-
ham and Bournemouth
found it a pain in the
backside but have
been able to make up
the difference and pull
away. However, Luton
were treated most
harshly and found
themselves starting the
campaign on a whop-
ping minus thirty
points. As was ex-
pected they have not
been able to overturn
this defecit and have had their relega-
tion to the Conference confirmed.
They will no doubt be heavy
favourites to come straight back up,
but that is not a trend that has been set
by teams leaving the Football League
in recent years.
At the top it had been a four way
shootout for the majority of the sea-
son, with Wycombe, Brentford, Bury
and Bradford setting the early pace.
Bradford have since drastically fallen
EUROPE
Like the Premiership, the title races in
top leagues around Europe have held
no real surprises, except maybe in
Germany.
The Bundesliga was shocked when
lowly village side Hoffenheim began
to dictate the early running and were
outperforming the likes of Bayern and
Stuttgart. It wouldn’t last though and
they now find them-
selves in eighth posi-
tion. However, that
wasn’t the end of the
surprises, as Wolfsburg
now head the table.
Bayern Munich are in
real danger of not qual-
ifying for next years
Champions League so
coach Jurgen Klins-
mann has just been dis-
missed.
In Spain it has been
Barcelona who have led the way since
pretty much the start. Under Pep
Guardiola the Catalans have been
awesome, playing outstanding attack-
ing football. And with a front three of
Henry, Eto’o and Messi with Xavi and
Iniesta behind providing world class
service it’s no wonder they are widely
considered the best team on the planet
at the moment. Juande Ramos was the
surprise appointment at Real Madrid
after Bernd Schuster was sacked, but
away and emerging from the darkness
was Exeter. The winners of last years
Conference playoff final were around
the League Two playoff places for a
while, but have recently put win after
win together and are now looking a
good bet to grab an automatic promo-
tion spot. They will have to fend off
the challenge of Bury if they are to do
so. Brentford have con-
firmed their promotion
which was expected and
it appears Wycombe will
join them.
Like the league table, the
scoring charts has seen a
new challenger emerge
towards the end of the
season. Chesterfield’s
Jack Lester was one of
the favourites for the
golden boot at the start of
the campaign but injuries
and poor form meant he faded into the
distance. Shrewsbury’s Grant Holt
and Gillingham’s Simeon Jackson
have spent most of the year at the top
of the charts, until Lester put a run of
goals together and now finds himself
at the top of the pile.
In the playoff race it seems it will be
made up of Gillingham, Rochdale,
one of Bury and Exeter and one of
Shrewsbury and Dagenham and Red-
bridge.
the former Spurs manager has been a
revelation at the Bernabeu, dragging
Barca back in the title race and getting
‘Los Merengues’ within four points of
their illustrious rivals.
Further down the table the Champions
League postions are up for grabs, with
Sevilla, Atletico, Villarreal, Malaga,
Deportivo and cash strapped Valencia
fighting it out. Valencia
desperately need the
cash input of Europe’s
premier competition.
When Jose Mourinho
went to Italy to manage
Inter Milan who had just
comfortably won the
league the year previous
there wasn’t anyone in
world football who
would have bet against
him being a success.
And so it has proved,
with Inter consistently matching the
results of their title rivals Juventus
and AC Milan throughout the season.
In France there has been a bit of a sur-
prise in that Lyon look like they will
not retain a title they have become ac-
customed to winning in recent years.
Marseille and Bordeaux have stepped
up and overtaken them, with the for-
mer looking favourite to pick up the
Ligue Un trophy thanks to the goals
of Mahamadou Niang.
 TEAM SHEET

TEAM SHEET
For the second half of team sheet we look at some
of the players who took the Premiership by storm
having arrived with very little reputation. No over-
paid Ukrainians, no overhyped Argentinians, no
French defenders...well one.
Carlo Cudicini
Chelsea
Initially bought in as a re-
serve keeper, Cudicini es-
tablished himself in the first
team and was named their
player of the season in
2002. He is now at Spurs.

Vedran Corluka Kolo Toure Sami Hyypia Gael Clichy

Manchester City
The Croatian right back was
a surprise success at East-
lands. He came in for £8m
but left for Tottenham a year
later for just half a million
more.
Arsenal
Toure was signed by Arsenal
in 2004 as a midfielder.
However, he established
himself in defence and has
been The Gunner’s Mr Con-
sistent ever since.
Liverpool
Brought in for £2.5m from
Willem II, the big Finn will
go down in history as one of
Liverpool’s best defenders.
He remains at Anfield after a
decade of service.
Arsenal
An example of Wenger’s
ability to find a gem, Clichy
was brought in to replace
Ashley Cole, who went to
Chelsea. He is widely con-
sidered to be better than Cole

Roy Keane
A Kanchelskis Nottingham Forest G Kinkladze
Manchester Utd Although he made his name Manchester City
An unknown Ukrainian mid- at Old Trafford, Keane was Not much was known about
fielder, Kanchelskis was brought to England by Forest the Georgian when he came,
signed by Ferguson in 1993. in 1990 from Irish side Cobh but he took the league by
The wing wizard also en- Ramblers. His record speaks storm. His trickery caused
joyed success at Everton and for itself. defences problems and
Rangers. brought City plenty of goals.

J.F Hasselbaink O.G Solskjaer Dwight Yorke

Leeds United
It seems like an age ago we
first saw Jimmy Floyd. The
Dutch striker was signed by
Leeds in 1997 for £2m and
went on to score 34 goals in
69 games at Elland Road.
Manchester Utd
Utd’s super-sub, the Nor-
weigan had a knack of scor-
ing off the bench. It was a
wonder he didn’t start more
games. He is now a coach in
the reserve set-up.
Aston Villa
People didn’t expect much
from the Trinidad and To-
bago forward but he scored
73 goals in 232 games for
Villa, then went on to be a
huge success at Man Utd.

29
 THERE’S ONLY

ONE LIVERPOOL? Interview By David Segar

Founder of AFC Liverpool Alun Parry talks about
the thinking behind his creation, how difficult it
was to achieve, and why Rafa Benitez and Kenny
Dalglish have given the club their full backing.

H
aving arranged to meet in a
classy bar in the middle of Liv-
erpool city centre, I make my
way through town to interview
Alun Parry, the man who created Liver-
pool’s newest football club. It occurs to
me that maybe I have underestimated
how tricky this interview might be. This
man created a whole football club, he has
been interviewed a thousand and one
times by various media outlets including
Sky Sports and LFCTV and he is also a
successful musician.
Will he be an uptight suit who will de-
mand professionalism in every aspect of
this young journalist and his interviewing
technique? Maybe I should turn back and
catch the second half of ‘Home and
Away’ instead. Then I recieve a text from
the man himself. “Am here mate upstairs.
Am all in black like a big fat specky
Johnny Cash”. Phew! I get to the bar and
look out for someone who is most likely
whistling ‘Ring of Fire’ and looks like
Joaquin Phoenix. We meet, shake hands
and exchange pleasantries. He informs
me he is available for the next hour. I as-
sure him the interview should not take
any longer than fifteen minutes. Well forty
minutes actually but who’s counting?
What was the thinking behind
AFC Liverpool?
“The landscape of football has changed
nowadays. Ticket prices have become so
expensive that normal people are being
priced out of going to matches on a Sat-
urday afternoon. My dad used to take me
to the game every week and the question
of money never came into it. Now most
dads can’t afford a ticket for both them
and their kids. My nephew is taken to An-
field by his dad on a matchday and they
just stand outside and absorb the atmos-
phere. For two tickets, a programme and
food and drinks on a Saturday at Anfield
it costs around £100. This is why you
don’t see many kids at football matches
these days. I’m a season ticket holder at
Liverpool and whenever I look around the
ground all I see is old fellas everywhere. I
created AFC Liverpool to give these fa-
ther’s who wanted to take their sons to a
football game on a weekend somewhere
to do that which was of an affordable
price. Fans are starting to lose their iden-
tities as well. All the city centres are start-
ing to look the same and there seems to
be a loss of heritage at certain clubs. I
learnt what it was to be a Liverpool fan
from the environment when I used to
stand on the terraces at Anfield, but
nowadays kids are learning about football
from TV. I wanted to create something in
the Liverpool image and a club that would
embody the values and spirit that is asso-
ciated with LFC. Kevin Keegan once said
that football was the people’s theatre, but
it costs about £15 to go to the theatre.
The average price for a Premiership
match these days is £40. At AFC Liver-
pool it is five pounds for adults and two
pounds for children. That’s affordable for
anyone who wants to go to a match on a
Saturday afternoon.”

30 www.onsidemag.com
ALUN PARRY INTERVIEW

It was definitely water

in that bottle...honest

31
So the club wasn’t created as a revolt
against the owners like FC United of
Manchester was, more an objection to
how expensive going to football has
become?
“Exactly. A few people have assumed
AFC was created because of the Ameri-
cans but to be honest it was more an ob-
jection to the idea of the 39th game.
When the proposal came about I realised
football was losing its identity. If it came
into effect the whole Premier League
would become a farce and I for one
would not support it.”
How difficult was the club to set up?
“More difficult than I thought it would be.
Looking back I think I may have gone into
it a little naïvely. I had to put my life on
hold for eight months to make sure it was
up and running in time for this season. I
was working on it seven days a week for
about sixteen hours a day. I was in Den-
mark for a music festival I was performing
at and at the same time I had to continue
with work on the club. I stayed awake for
four days straight during that trip. Then I
got a call from the FA saying that we
couldn’t enter the league because we
didn’t have a good enough ground to play
at. Eventually we negotiated a deal
where Prescot Cables would allow us to
use their stadium and we were accepted
into the Vodkat league.”
You managed to get John Aldridge,
Vegard Heggem and Erik Meijer as pa-
trons of the club. How did that come
about and what exactly does it mean?
“A patron effectively means they are a
club ambassador. Erik Meijer’s involve-
ment came about via e-mail. We asked
him if he would be willing to be a patron
of the club and he was more than happy
to do so. I was put in touch with Heggem
through a Norweigan journalist who had
interviewed me. Once Liverpool FC an-
nounced their approval of the project
Heggem was okay with adding his name
to the list. John Aldridge heard about the
club through word of mouth and rang me
to say he approved and would be more
than willing to become a club patron. We
Aldo the
ambassador
were also able to get David Johnson on
board. I was being interviewed by the
club channel LFCTV and Johnson said
he loved the idea and would be an am-
bassador for the club too. There have
also been words of support from Rick
32 www.onsidemag.com
Parry, Kenny Dalglish and Rafael Ben-
itez.”
AFC Liverpool currently find them-
selves second in their division. How
do you think the club have done so
far?
“I think they’ve done very well consider-
ing the manager had to start from
scratch. With most teams the manager is
able to look at strengths and weaknesses
in his team and make minor changes
here and there, but Derek (Goulding) had
to build an entire team from nothing. Re-
sults have fallen a bit recently but this
time of the season is always difficult for
clubs with a small squad like ours.
The team plays a bit like Liverpool do,
with passing and moving and keeping the
ball on the floor. At this time of year a lot
of the pitches are cut up and it is difficult
to play this kind of game. They should fin-
ish in the top two and get promoted to the
first division. A lot of other teams have a
fixture pile up because of numerous can-
cellations earlier in the season. We don’t
have that problem as the pitch we play on
at Prescot is much better quality than oth-
ers in the league. I am certainly proud of
what they have achieved in their first ever
season.”
Do you think there is a danger that if
AFC Liverpool become successful and
go up the leagues that eventually their
ticket prices will rise to the extent that
Liverpool’s have?
“I don’t think that will be a problem as the
club is owned by the supporters. The club
was set up in this way to protect against
that very problem. Things like ticket
prices are voted on by the fans so if they
were to put ticket prices up they would be
voting against themselves. I think the
club is capable of eventually becoming a
Football League outfit, and they will find
their level. But the fans vote on pretty
The AFC Liverpool
players check each
other for nits.
much everything at the club so even if
they do move up the leagues I doubt the
prices will become much higher than they
are now. Because the club is owned by
the fans every penny that comes into the
club is re-invested. Whereas other non-
league clubs are privately owned and
gate money is spent on the owners boat
“
The team plays
a bit like Liverpool
do, with passing,
moving and keep-
ing the ball on the
floor. ”
payments, AFC Liverpool keeps its
money in house.”
Parry decided to leave the club in Febru-
ary of this year.. He was confident he was
leaving the club in capable hands and
confessed he still enjoys going to games.
What are you up to now?
“Well I’ve just finished making my third
album, that’s going to be out in August.
Then I’m planning on touring in Septem-
ber. I haven’t confirmed any dates yet be-
cause I need to see the fixture list for
next season first. I don’t want to schedule
a date on the same day we’re at home to
United or Everton.”
What do you make of Liverpool FC’s
current situation?
“There’s been a noticeable improvement
this year but I can’t help but look at the
league table with regret. We’re in a good
position but we’ve dropped so many stu-
pid points at home that really we should
be clear at the top. I’m dreaming that

United slip up and let us back in but to be
honest I can’t see it. Having said that I’d
be happy with finishing second. I think
you have to go through a campaign like
this before you can think about winning
the league. Finishing second will propel
our challenge next season as the players
will be hungry for success and realise
con’s of Lucas Leiva.
One of the most pleasant and natural in-
terview subjects I have had the fortune to
meet, I eventually shake hands and part
ways with the co-owner and creator of
“ There was a
ALUN PARRY INTERVIEW
children. If you are in the North West and
feel like Alun that Premiership football
has become too expensive, give Prescot
Cables a visit and cheer on the newest
team on Merseyside.
AFC Liverpool’s remaining home fixtures

they can do it. I think the international point in time this Tue 7th April - Norton Utd - 7:45PM

season where both

break has come at an unfortunate time Wed 22nd April - Holker Old Boys - 7:45PM
but hopefully we can finish the season Wed 29th April - Stone Dominoes - 7:45PM

AFC and LFC were

strongly and we’ll just have to see how Sat 2nd May - Chadderton - 3:00PM
United do. You never know. There was a
top of their
moment this season where both AFC Liv- VODKAT LEAGUE FIRST DIVISION
Table P GD PTS
divisions. ”
erpool and Liverpool FC were top of their
divisions, that was pleasing to see and I 1. Bootle 26 45 61
hope it happens more often in the future.” 2. AFC Liverpool28 35 56
the potential future rivals of Everton Foot- 3. Padiham 24 34 51
With twenty minutes still to spare we con- ball Club. 4. Wigan R.P 25 20 47
clude the interview. We continue to dis- AFC Liverpool have four home games re- 5. Oldham Town 24 17 45
cuss Liverpool FC, who they should buy maining this season in the Vodkat league.
in the transfer window, and the pro’s and Entrance is just £5 for adults and £2 for

ADVERTISMENT

We’ve got all the top quality

football you could want!...and the
Blue Square Premier

33

HYPOTHETICAL
SHIELD
Real Madrid 1960 vs Manchester United 1999
In pubs up and down the
country there are thousands
of ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ that
drunk football fans debate,
argue and fight over till they
forget what the question was.
Enter Onside. We have taken it upon ourselves to
provide answers to the age old questions of ‘who
would beat who’ when it comes to teams from dif-
ferent eras. Many things have to be taken into ac-
count such as the overall strength of the team, the
style of football that they played, and the quality of
the opposition they came up against.
There are loads of great teams from Celtic’s Euro-
pean Cup winning side, to Holland’s late eighties
‘total football’ side, to Arsenal’s ‘invincibles’ in
2004. There are so many potentially mouth-water-
ing ties to choose from, but as its the first ever
34 www.onsidemag.com
the
Hypothetical Shield we have gone for a big one. ers in the world at the time. The homegrown talent
The goal hungry Real Madrid side from 1960 go up in the midfield was key to United’s style of pace
against Manchester United’s treble winning side and energy in their play. David Beckham, Paul Sc-
from 1999. holes, Nicky Butt and Ryan Giggs all had various
First of all lets have a look at the teams, starting attacking strengths and provided a threat to the op-
with Real Madrid. position in every game they played. Andy Cole and
The 1960 side is widely considered to be the best Dwight Yorke were the regular strike-force and
team ‘Los Merengues’ have ever produced, with managed to keep Teddy Sheringham and Ole Gun-
world class all over the pitch and most notably, two
of the greatest players of all time up front.
In Alfredo Di Stefano and Ferenc Puskas, Madrid
had the deadliest duo on the planet. In today’s
terms it would be like having Fernando Torres and
Lionel Messi in the same team. Puskas and Di Ste-
fano would bang goals in left, right and centre
against all kinds of opposition, and were the only
two Madrid goalscorers in the 7-3 European Cup
Final win against Eintracht Frankfurt.
But Madrid were far from being a two man team.
They boasted quality all over the pitchm the likes
of Gento, Santamaria, Canario and Vidal compli-
menting Puskas and Di Stefano. There was also the
expert captaincy of Jose Maria Zarraga. Zarraga
was a great leader of men and when his side were
in trouble he had a knack of riling up the troops and
getting them back into gear, very much like a cur-
rent day Steven Gerrard.
Real’s manager was Miguel Munoz. Munoz spent
most of his career at the Bernabeu both as player
and coach. He scored Madrid’s first ever goal in the
European Cup in 1955 against Servette FC. When
Madrid won the 1960 European Cup final Munoz
became the first ever person to win the trophy as nar Solskjaer out of the team. Cole and Yorke were
both player and manager. He still remains Real’s the deadliest pairing in Europe at the time and
most successful coach to date. scored 53 goals between them in the 1998/99 sea-
son. United’s heart was their captain Roy Keane.
The United team won the league and the FA Cup as The Irishman was always influential on the team
well as the European Cup in 1999, and they were and was always running box to box in order to dic-
able to achieve this because of their impressive tate the play.
strength in depth. Now, onto the matter at hand, Real Madrid 1960
They had Peter Schmeichel in goal, a bastion of versus Manchester United 1999 for the first ever
consistency and the club’s greatest ever shot stop- Hypothetical Shield. The line-ups (top right) show
per. Jaap Stam was at the heart of the defence and that Madrid are at full strength, whereas Utd are
was widely considered to be one of the best defend missing their captain Roy Keane due to suspension.
 HYPOTHETICAL SHIELD

Gento
Giggs
G. Neville

Puskas
Pachin

Zarraga (c) Beckham Stam

Cole

Dominguez Santamaria Di Stefano Schmeichel (c)

Yorke

Vidal Butt Johnsen

Marquitos
del Sol

Irwin
Canario Blomqvist

The rules state they must be the same team that
played in their respective European Cup Final wins,
so Schmeichel takes over the armband for the Red
Devils.
Madrid line up with a 3-4-3 formation, with Puskas
and Di Stefano leading the line with Del Sol to the
right of them. United show up with a traditional 4-
4-2, with Jesper Blomqvist replacing Keane and
Giggs moving over to the right of midfield.
Miguel
Munoz
The game kicks off at quite a slow pace, neither
side willing to give up the first goal. There are
some sloppy passes and numerous fouls committed.
Scholes is booked for a foul on Vidal in just the
eighth minute, he’ll have to be careful from now
on. Puskas hits a free kick from thirty yards but
Schmeichel deals with it comfortably.
Then, out of nowhere, Real take the lead. A through
ball from Gento finds Di Stefano who rounds the
keeper and slots it home. United are shell shocked
and have to put up with some more pressure, wor-
ried they might go two down. Puskas tests Schme-
ichel again from range and Canario just misses the
far post with a shot come cross.
The English side begin to step on the gas and get
out of their own half. A neat one two between Sc-
holes and Giggs gets Utd down the left hand side.
The Welshman ghosts past Pachin and squares it for
Andy Cole. However, Cole is on the stretch and can
only find the side-netting with his effort.
United keep up the pressure and are rewarded in the
thirtieth minute when a Beckham free kick is
palmed out straight to the feet of Scholes who has
an easy job of tapping it in. One all.
Back to square one, the game becomes stale again.
There is some nice passing moves but both de-
fences have learnt their lessons and are cutting out
anything that gets within reach of their penalty
area. Santamaria is marking Yorke out of the game
and Stam is keeping close to Puskas to try and ex-
tinguish his influence.
Then, just before half time, Puskas finally gets the
better of his Dutch marker. Zarraga plays it to the
Hungarians feet, Puskas then turns away from Stam
and plays it down the wing for Gento to run onto.
Gento puts in a fizzing cross to the far post finding
the head of Del Sol, who heads it back across goal
and Puskas volleys it home. Madrid go in 2-1 up at
half time.
The Spaniards will certainly be the happier of the
two going in at the break, but with the attacking
quality on show there will be chances for United to
rectify this scoreline.
There are no changes for the second half, mainly
because substitutes didn’t exist in 1960 so only
United have the option to bring subs on.
The Manchester team begin the half brightly, and
come close to equalising when Yorke meets a
Blomqvist cross, but his header grazes the top of
the bar.
It’s end to end stuff and you get the feeling a goal
for either team would completely change the tempo
of the game. That goal comes in the sixty fourth
minute, and it goes to Real Madrid.
Canario wins a corner and takes it himself. The ini-
tial ball in is cleared by Ronny Johnsen but only
goes as far as Puskas whose first time shot sails
straight into the top corner.
Ferguson throws on Sheringham and Solskjaer for
Blomqvist and Yorke and goes all out attack to try
and get back into the game. It almost pays off
straight away as Sheringham diverts a wayward
Denis Irwin shot towards goal but Dominguez is
Alex
Ferguson
equal to it and diverts it round the post.
Then disaster for United. A counter attack from
Madrid leads to Di Stefano being one on one with
Schmeichel. He selflessly squares the ball to
Puskas who rolls it into the net and completes his
hat-trick.
In the dying minutes Sheringham heads a consola-
tion from a Beckham corner and Solskjaer taps in a
third after a killer through ball from Giggs, but it is
too late.
The final whistle goes and Real Madrid are
crowned the kings of European history and are the
inaugural winners of the Hypothetical Shield.

REAL MADRID 4
MAN UTD 3
35
 The Badly Drawn Adventures of...

STICKY McKENNA
Press Conference at Here are some of your
I want goals from you Ok, boss
Newchester Albion F.C Sticky, and for crying
teammates, Mark, Julio and Ugly
Dan
out loud get a haircut!
We’d like to introduce
our new signing, Sticky Isn’t he a
bit fat? Christ. he’s
McKenna! Hey
hideous!

Yes he is, and will

God, he’s brilliant Well Sticky, it’s your
you take that hat debut for Newchester,
off? what do you hope will
happen?
Whatever happens I “Kick off here at Stick Stadium, it’s Newchester
hope it’s easy to draw
vs Queens Park Villa.”

“McKenna goes on a mazy run, but he has been “The referee has blown for a foul, and he’s issued a “McKenna scores!!! He’s curled the ball into the top
tackled by the big bruiser Liney Thomas.” red card to Thomas. It’s a free kick to Newchester on corner. We’ve just moved into injury time and it looks
the edge of the area.” like the new boy has won the game for Newchester!”

Yay!

“The final whistle goes and Newchester have

Well Sticky, you I’m just going to
won by a goal to nil. Sticky McKenna is the scored the winning make sure I rest up
hero of the hour!” goal in the last minute for the next game.
Wooooooooooo!!!!
and picked up the stick
of the match award.
What are you going to
do next?

NEXT MONTH: Sticky is seen leaving a nightclub

with glamour model Danielle Lloyd.
36 www.onsidemag.com
 FAN Q&A

FAN Q&A
Simon Gerrard who is just put wher-
ever. I’ll say Rooney.

Parker Q: Have any England players

surprised you since Capello
ENGLAND came in?
A: They all have in a way. I
FAN never knew they could play like
a team but they’ve certainly

------------------- shown it in their last few games.

Individually though I suppose
Simon is a student from the likes of Walcott and John-
son. Johnson especially as I al-
Oxford currently studying ways thought he was useless
Film at Liverpool Hope when he was at Chelsea.
University.
Q: Are there any players not
in the England squad who you
Q: Have you supported Eng-
would like to see included?
land your whole life?
A: I’d love to see Jimmy Bullard
A: Yes, even through the Steve
back in the squad but he’d have
McClaren years. Those were
to get fit first. I wouldn’t mind
tough times but we’ve seen
seeing Kevin Davies get a
them through and now we’ve
chance, I mean if Carlton Cole
entered the age of Capello.
can play for England why not
him? Maybe his Bolton team-
Q: So you think Fabio Capello
mate Matty Taylor too.
has done a good job so far?
A: Absolutely. There have been
Q: In the unlikely event that
a couple of hiccups like the de-
Capello were to leave the job
feats to France and Spain but
tomorrow, who would you like
they were just learning curves.
to see take over?
The win in Germany was sweet
A: I pray that doesn’t happen,
even if it was a friendly. It looks
but if it did I would go for an
like we’ll qualify comfortably for
English manager. Maybe it’s
the 2010 World Cup so he’s al-
about time Harry Redknapp was
ready done better than that pil-
given a chance. He’s always
lock McClaren.
wanted the job and he’s been
fairly successful in club manage-
Q: Assuming they do qualify
ment.
for the World Cup, how far do
you think England can go?
Q: What do you make of the
A: It may be too early to say
new England kit?
they can win it but I’m hoping we
A: God it’s horrible isn’t it!? It
can at least reach the semi-fi-
looks like a cricket shirt. I’ll prob-
nals. We haven’t done that since
ably still get one anyway at
1990, it’s about time we did.
some point but not at full price.
I’m sure Sports World will sell it
Q: Who do you consider to be
for about four quid when the
England’s best player?
World Cup comes around just to
A: It’s a toss up between Ger-
get everyone in England colours
rard and Rooney. I think Gerrard
for the summer.
is the better player but Rooney
has more influence on games. It
Thank you for your time
might be because he gets to
Simon.
play in his natural position unlike
It was my pleasure.

37
A DAY AT THE
MUSEUM
As the UEFA Football Exhibition rolls into the
World Museum in Liverpool, Onside goes along
to see football’s European governing body put
their private bits on display
I
t’s a warm Saturday morning and the footy rit-
uals have begun. Up at quarter to nine to
check the headlines on Sky Sports News, then
three hours of ‘Soccer AM’, followed by
‘Football Focus’ and then a couple of hours of Jeff
Stelling and the boys on ‘Soccer Saturday’. But
hang on a minute, my team isn’t playing until half
five. What on earth am I supposed to do till then? I
know, I’ll go to the museum, it was obvious really
wasn’t it?
It is the World Museum in Liverpool, and there
happens to be a football exhibition on at the mo-
ment, where UEFA are showing off various tro-
phies and more artefacts than you can shake a cup
of bovril at.
Running from November 2008-April 2009, ‘Only a
Game?’ looks at the human face of football in Eu-
rope from the classic era of the fifties to the current
day of global superstars.
It is UEFA’s way of celebrating the game of foot-
ball with the people who make it what it is, the
fans. And what better place to hold it then in a city
that houses two of Europe’s biggest clubs, one of
which has won Europe’s premier club competition
38 www.onsidemag.com
on five occasions. Not to mention that it was attrib-
uted as the European Capital of Culture for 2008,
and what is more cultural than a game where
Sir Thomas Lipton
Trophy Medal from 1909
twenty two grown men in shorts try to kick a
leather ball past each other?
The exhibition was first put on display in Brussels
where it enjoyed a lot of success and critical ac-
cliam as people from all over the continent came to
see it.
Numerous figures from the world of football have
thrown their weight behind the exhibition, heaping
praise not only on the exhibition itself, but the deci-
sion to bring it to Liverpool.
Michel Platini, President of UEFA and three times
European Footballer of the Year, said: “I am de-
lighted that UEFA is bringing this exciting exhibi-
tion to Liverpool during its Capital of Culture
celebrations, a city that loves its football and plays
such a big role in Europe’s fascination with the
game.” High praise indeed from one of the game’s
greatest ever players and now one of the sport’s
most powerful individuals.
Fellow Frenchman Lilian Thuram, official patron
of the exhibition and winner of both the World Cup
and European Championship with France, said:
“Football brings people together across Europe. It
speaks a simple language that everyone under-
stands. Only a Game? shines a light on all the ac-
tors that play a role: fans, school kids, amateurs, as
well as the professional players.”
Looking at European culture through the lens of
football, Only a Game? highlights the parallels,
positive and negative, between the two. Solidarity,
 UEFA EXHIBITION

ARTICLE BY
DAVID SEGAR

success, participation, celebration, racism and inte-
gration is all examined in this thought-provoking
exhibition. The City of Liverpool has played a cen-
tral role in this story.
Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard added his praise
people from all over the region and beyond to visit
the exhibition."
The exhibition has a number of features to it that
can keep the everyday football fan ensconced for
hours.
• A set of giant football figures telling the evocative
personal stories of players including Kevin Keegan,
Bernd Trautmann and Johann Cruyff
• Key items from the Everton Collection and from
Liverpool FC Museum

“
behind the exhibition saying "There is no city in • Memory Zone where visitors can mix their own
Europe where football means more than it does to
the people of Liverpool. So I think it is great that
Gerrard: There is no football highlights into a video clip and set it to a
soundtrack
we are having a European football exhibition as city in Europe where • Interactive multimedia football quiz
part of Liverpool 08." • Portrait gallery of grassroots footballers from Liv-
Bryan Gray, Chair of the Liverpool Culture Com- football means more erpool and across Europe.
pany, added: “Sport is part of Liverpool’s heritage
than it does to the When I initially walked through the doors to the ex-

and football has helped to shape this city of culture,
so it should be no surprise to see it feature so
prominently in the Capital of Culture programme.
We are delighted to welcome Only a Game? to the
European Capital of Culture; I can think of
nowhere more fitting for this thought provoking ex-
hibition.”
Olivier Guilbaud, the man behind the exhibition,
said: "It's great to be able to take Only a Game? to
Liverpool because it is a city whose passion for
football remains second to none in Europe. Thanks
to its location, the World Museum should enable
”
people of Liverpool.
Highlights include:
• Player memorabilia from the National Football
Museum - shirts, medals and trophies of great Eu-
ropean players such as Phil Neal, George Best, Fer-
enc Puskas, Franz Beckenbauer, Bobby Moore,
Stanley Matthews and Petr Cech
• A display of UEFA trophies, including the Cham-
pions League trophy and UEFA Cup
hibition I was initially taken aback by these giant
subbuteo figures glaring down at me. On closer in-
spection these were the figures which as stated in
the highlights tell stories of past players. There is
an archway to walk through behind them with a
quote from Lilian Thuram. It takes a while to read
it before I realise I’m holding up the line.
Then in front of me is a gauntlet of various football
memorabilia as far as the eye can see. Each glass
cabinet contains one, two or more pieces of football
history.
As expected it is all in chronological order, so fit-

39
tingly the first object I come across is a Sir Thomas
Lipton Trophy winners medal from 1909. It be-
longed to Tom Gill of the victorious West Auckland
team who beat FC Winterthur of Switzerland 2-0 in
the final.
Next to it was a shiny golden ball, but not just any
shiny gold ball. It was the Ballon’D’or trophy (the
European Player of the Year Award) from 1956,
won by England’s Stanley Matthews.
It is shirts galore after that with a Franz Becken-
bauer Germany top from a match against France
glowing as if it is better than the others, much like
Beckenbauer did when he was playing.
Another shirt I come across at the end of the gaunt-
let is one that will be instantly recognisable with
Premiership fans. It was also worn by a German. It
is the purple Tottenham away kit, in particular the
specific shirt worn by Jurgen Klinsmann when he
scored on his debut at Sheffield Wednesday in
1994.
Wait a minute, there’s something else in this cabi-
net, but it’s not a shirt, or a medal, or a trophy, it
kind of looks like a puppet. On closer inspection it
is the puppet used by the comedy television show
‘Spitting Image’, more specifically it is the puppet
of Manchester United legend Eric Cantona.
Having looked at all of these various shirts and
other football artefacts it is hard to believe I am
barely halfway through the exhibition, what else
could they have to show me? Wait a minute, is that
the European Championship?
A trophy cabinet that would make most manager’s
drool over lies ahead, with the main attraction
being the UEFA European Championship trophy.
It was won by Spain last summer thanks to a Fer-
nando Torres goal against Germany in the final, and
now it is on display in the city where Torres plays
his club football. If irony was made of strawberry’s,
we’d all be drinking a lot of smoothies right about
now.
Originally the cabinet also had the Champions
League and UEFA Cup trophies, but unfortunately
they have been whisked off to be readied for this
years winners. Some people can be so selfish.
There are several people surrounding the famous
trophy so I decide to move on and check the others
out before going back to it.
Accompanying the Euro trophy is the UEFA
Under-21 trophy, won by Holland two years ago
and which will be competed for again this summer.
Next to it is the UEFA Women’s trophy. No this is
not the European trophy for the best woman, it is
awarded to the winners of the Women’s European
Stanley Matthews, the
original ‘Golden Balls’
40 www.onsidemag.com
Championship.
Finally I see a cup which seems familiar but I can’t
quite put my finger on it. You know when you see a
celebrity and think “I thought he was dead”, well
that’s how I felt, and then I realised why, it was the
European Cup Winners Cup. The competition was
A Hungary shirt from their
famous Wembley win
stopped about a decade ago and integrated into the
UEFA Cup and was for the winners of domestic
cup competitions in each country i.e. the winner of
the FA Cup would play in the Cup Winners Cup in-
“Now get out there lads
and make sure you keep
your heads!”
stead of the UEFA Cup like they do today.
The crowd has dispursed and the European Cham-
pionship is now free. Taking photo’s of this beauti-
ful trophy I come to an educated decision, it is
impossible to take a picture of this bloomin trophy
without getting glare of the lights.
Having basked in its glory for a few minutes I no-
tice something to the right of it, something that
isn’t a trophy. They look like bingo balls, or those
little plastic containers you used to get in Kinder
Surprise. They are the plastic balls and official
names of the teams from a Champions League last
sixteen draw from 2007. Names like Real Madrid
and Manchester United are printed on what looks
like the same kind of paper you get jokes printed on
in crackers.
There is a quiz machine in the corner, but it is not
just any ordinary quiz machine, all the questions
are based around European football history. Con-
sidering myself a bit of an anorak I step up confi-
dently and wait for Chris Tarrant to tell me what to
do. Strangely he didn’t feature in this quiz but it
was a steady start, challenging but not got any
wrong yet. ‘Who was the captain of Club Brugge
when they defeated Real Madrid in 1979?’ Right,
how exactly do you put your tail between your
legs?
After that there are several pieces of football re-
lated artwork, including a big print of the President
of UEFA Michel Platini during an international
match with France. There are televisions showing
goals from the past and present in European foot-
ball, I’m sorry but when there’s footy on the telly it
doesn’t matter where you are, you are going to stop
and watch it. It shows gems from the likes of Van
Basten, Ronaldo, Puskas, Garcia and Platini
(again? Anyone would think he owned the place).
At the exit of the exhibit is a print of George Best,
doing what he does best (excuse the pun) and is a
fitting way to end the experience. Right now onto
the dinosaurs!
It certainly wasn’t how I anticipated spending my
Saturday afternoon. I think someone suggested to
me once before if I wanted to go to a museum on a
weekend and I seem to remember I had them sec-
tioned. But this was a genuinely enjoyable and edu-
cational experience. Being in the presence of so
many historical pieces of memorabilia from this
game we all love so much was awe inspiring.
The exhibit runs at the World Museum in Liverpool
until April 26th, and I whole-heartedly suggest you
get down there and see it, it’s free after all.
 UEFA EXHIBITION

The now extinct Cup The European The Under-21

Winners Cup Championship Trophy

What number are you

Michel? Ooh nearly

How can a puppet

look like an arro-
gant wannabe
poet?

Shouldn’t this have mud

stains all down the front?

41
IT’S NOT JUST
A GAME,
IT’S MORE
IMPORTANT
THAN THAT
I
t has been one of the predominant tools man
has used in recent years to put off doing any
work. If the missus says she’s going out shop-
ping and wants you to clean the car before she
gets back then more than likely you will think to
yourself “Yeah I’ll get right onto that...just after
I’ve finished my Crewe Alexandra season on Foot-
ball Manager.”
Many an hour has been ‘wasted’ by man searching
for the secret formula to creating a Champions
League winning outfit when they should be taking
the dog for a walk. However, the joy that over-
comes a player when their £3m striker has just
given Burnley their fourth goal in the Champions
League final against Real Madrid makes it all
worthwhile.
The Football Manager franchise has been going
since 2005, when they broke away from their now
rivals, Championship Manager, after a falling out
with their publishers Eidos. The games are de-
velped by Sports Interactive and are now published
by SEGA.
If you have never heard of the game and haven’t
figured it out already, ‘FM’ is a football manage-
ment simulation, where you can become manager
of any club in the world and attempt to guide them
to success.
There is an easy to use interface and a match en-
42 www.onsidemag.com
A look at the popular
video game franchise
that is the Football
Manager series
Interview by
David Segar
gine that simulates the matches for you. In 2005
through to 2008 the game used a 2D match engine.
However, this year for the first time a 3D engine
has been attempted, making the experience more
realistic than ever.
But personally what I wanted to know was what
happens behind the game? How much work goes
into producing a database which holds thousands of
different players and teams?
I was lucky enough to speak with Sports Interac-
tive’s Dean Gripton to find out more.
How long have you been working at Sports In-
teractive?
I’ve been here since 2002, and working on the Eng-
lish Research team for the last four years.
What exactly does your job entail?
I am one of two people contracted to manage the
English research team here at Sports Interactive. I
also work alongside the researchers of the other
countries, analysing their databases, making any
necessary amendments and helping them improve
their own management of their own country data-
bases.
I also have to test the data, and the tools used to
create and store the data, during the year. This in-
volves checking and re-checking how the data ap-
pears in the editors and ensuring that the editors
and databases used by Head Researchers and their
assistants work to purpose.
How much effort and time goes into each edition
of Football Manager?
The evolution of each FM release starts before even
the release of the previous year’s game. Ie, FM2010
ideas and plans were set in place before FM2009
was released. Indeed, we have in place some future
ideas and plans for FM2011 and even FM2012, in
terms of new features and improvements to the
many current features.
There are over 50 full-time staff here at SI working
on Football Manager in one of its many guises, and
while everyone is contracted to work a 40-hour
week, I cannot believe that anyone works ‘only’ that
amount. In particular, during the ‘crunch’ periods
of the weeks before an impending release, produc-
ers, coders, researchers and testers all work many
more hours than that as we wish to make the best
game that we can.
Including researchers, how many people does it
take to produce each edition of the game?
As mentioned, there are 50 full-time staff here, and
throughout the year there are many temporary full-
time testers working in our test lab here, with those
figures depending on the workload of the time.
“There are some very
interesting new features
planned, but I’d have to
kill you if I told you!”
There are 60 Head Researchers maintaining data-
bases of players, clubs and competitions in their
country, and nearly all rely on unpaid assistants
who volunteer extra information about their spe-
cific club.
Why do you think FM games are so popular?
They allow gamers to immerse themselves into the
world of football in a different way to any other
football game. You do not have to be skilful with a
joystick to beat an opponent, you use your own
knowledge of tactics to try and outwit the AI and
achieve results with your team. You are not re-
stricted to playing as Manchester United, AC Milan
or Barcelona and you can play as Basingstoke
Town, or Berwick Rangers, or as Güngören
Belediyespor in Turkey.

Do you play the game in your leisure time?
I wish I did! I do not have much time for any com-
puter games – indeed I have never even owned a
console of any sort and have only ever played FM
(or Championship Manager before the split in
2005). When I do, I invariably end up looking at
the data on a professional level, logging aspects I
wish to change or discuss with other researchers,
rather than enjoying the game for what it is. Which
is why, for FM2009, I did not play in the lower
leagues in England, as I used to do.
When you get a chance to play what team do
you usually pick?
In my FM2010 game I picked Sivasspor in Turkey.
The reasons for this was that there was an upheaval
in the Turkish research team in 2007 and 2008, and
I knew that the database was much improved for
that country to the level that I knew I could trust it.
I knew that I would not have prior knowledge of the
majority of players in the Turkish Premier Division,
so that all helped me choose a league. I went for
Sivasspor as I did not wish to choose one of the
giant clubs such as Galatasaray, and chose Sivas
because they were in the InterToto Cup which I
thought would make it interesting. Little did I know
that, in real life, Sivasspor would be challenging
for a shock first-ever Turkish title success! That
said, I am a slow player and have only played the
first couple of months of the first season.
Which member of the staff is best at the game?
Miles Jacobsen, our MD, plays the game the most
(he needs to know everything about how he works)
and is always keen to find the latest youth discover-
ies, so I’d say he is. That is only because the guys
FOOTBALL MANAGER
who code the match engine (Paul Collyer) and
transfer modules (Keith Flannery) are too busy
coding to play!
Are there any new features planned for FM2010
or beyond?
There are some very interesting new features
planned, but I’d have to kill you if I told you! Many
improvements to current features are also being
planned.
Football Manager will always be close to my heart.
It has taken up about a third of my life in the last
four years and I’m sure as long as Dean and the rest
of the gang are improving future games in the se-
ries, my life will continue to go on a downward spi-
ral...that is until I win the Champions League with
Crawley Town.
43
REVIEWS
The Damned Utd
A portrayal of one of
England’s finest managers
Based on David Peace’s controversial book of
the same name, The Damned United follows
the legendary Brian Clough during his ill-
fated six weeks in charge of Leeds. It is done
in a slightly more glowing way towards
Clough as opposed to the book which the
Clough family condemned.
Jelleyman’s Thrown
A Wobbly
An inside look into life as a
Sky Sports pundit
The cult SkySports Soccer Saturday anchorman de-
livers a volley of entertaining and informative an-
ecdotes about life in front of the vidiprinter.
Jeff Stelling is a legend amongst football fans. To
the millions unable to get to their teams' games on
Saturday afternoons, the next best thing is undoubt-
edly the pleasurable company of Jeff and the Sky
Sports vidiprinter for a cosy marathon on the sofa.
If someone's got to reveal that your beloved team
have just gone 3-0 down away from home and had
a man sent off, it's best if it's consummate profes-
sional Jeff who breaks the news to you.
Avid Hartlepool fan Jeff knows our pain and shares
our joy!but mostly he knows our pain. The long-
time host of SkySports' iconic Soccer Saturday
show has become a cult figure, universally admired
for his encyclopaedic knowledge of the game, his
genuine and unlimited enthusiasm for ALL levels
of football, and his wicked sense of humour which
makes the six-hour long show simply whizz by.
Jelleyman's Thrown a Wobbly is a deliciously
chaotic, hugely entertaining, anecdote-ridden, hu-
morous taste of life in the Soccer Saturday studio.
55 www.onsidemag.com
Michael Sheen continues his trend of imper-
sonating historical figures (Tony Blair in The
Queen and David Frost in Frost/Nixon). He
portrays ‘Ol’ big ‘ead’ expertly, especially in
the scene where he is first introduced to the
Leeds Squad.
Rather than purely being a football film, it is
more of a ‘buddy movie’, concentrating on
the relationship between Clough and his as-
sistant Peter Taylor (Timothy Spall).
The film is the length of a football match
with seven minutes of injury time, I suppose
Hear what Jeff has to say about some of the show's
legendary pundits over the years, ex-players such
as George Best, Rodney Marsh, Chris Kamara,
Charlie Nicholas and Matt Le Tissier.
Be a fly on the wall of the hotel bar on Friday
nights as Jeff and his guests gather for a natter and
few drinks. Get the inside track on all those great
one-liners: / "Mansfield Town's Gareth Jelleyman
A look at
some of the
latest footy
films, books,
games and
kit available
the makers thought that was a guaranteed
time football fans are willing to sit and watch
something.
There are hits and misses within the film but
overall it is enjoyable enough to warrant
going to see. Now all we need is the next
manager bio-pic, Neil Warnock and the Tem-
ple of Doom.
RATING: A NARROW 2-1
HOME WIN
has been shown the red card for dissent. Looks like
Jellyman's thrown a wobbly." / "Darlington's
equaliser has been scored by Guyain Ndumbu-
Nsungu. Very much a case of local boy makes
good." (He's from Congo.) / "They'll be dancing in
the streets of Total Network Solutions tonight." /
"James Brown's grabbed a second for Hartlepool. I
feel good!"
The man who is currently wowing housewives
across the country on Countdown has put this book
together to give football fans a chance to share in
the banter that regularly goes on in Isleworth, Mid-
dlesex at the Sky Sports studios. Whether its the in-
sistent disagreeing just for the sake of disagreeing
of Paul Merson, the ever so slight Liverpool bias of
Phil Thompson or the ridiculous, nonsensical yam-
merings of Chris Kamara. “I tell you what Jeff,
Stoke City are defending like badgers at the mo-
ment.”
Jelleyman's Thrown a Wobbly goes a long way to
demonstrate how a six-hour long, studio-based
show with no live action pictures and featuring
men gazing into TV monitors which the viewer
can't see, can hold a huge audience enthralled every
Saturday afternoon between August and May.
RATING: A 5-0 MAULING, COME
ON YOU JEFF!
 REVIEWS

Umbro England Boots

Accompanying the shirt are these limited edition ‘Spe-
ciali’ football boots, of which just 283 will be made
(pairs, not individual boots).
They are made of kangaroo leather (so jumping shouldn’t
be a problem) and boast covered lacing which supposedly
provides more control. They cost £150...for the pair.

RATING: A COMFY 1-1 DRAW

New England Home

Shirt
Let’s face it, you know it, I know it, it looks like a
cricket shirt. In fact if you took a plain white polo
shirt and stuck an Umbro logo and an England badge
Adidas UEFA Champions
on it you could probably make it yourself. League Finale Ball
Why was this design chosen? It was “a statement of Based on the star design of previous Champions League
confidence and unity — an intimidating sight for op- balls, the Adidas 2009 Rome Finale ball integrates PSC-
ponents“, according to officials. Couldn’t they have Texture, meaning there are tiny bumps across the surface
just stuck Wayne Rooney’s face on the front? which allows greater control for the player.
The burgundy colour is related to the colour of AS Roma
RATING: A DRAB 1-0 DEFEAT

RATING: AN EXCITING 3-1 AWAY WIN

Pro Evolution
Soccer 2009
Konami provide
us with another
edition of the
ever popular Pro
Evo franchise,
still the same
rubbish sound-
track though.
Once again we as consumers are asked the oh so
important question. It is often used as an opening
query to someone, from man to man, when you
first meet. It helps people decide what kind of per-
son you are, indeed they may be able to tell your
whole character from your answer to the one and
only question...FIFA or Pro Evo?
The war has been going on in the video game
world for the best part of a decade with ups and
downs along the way.
Arguably, Pro Evo has been leading the way for the
past few years, with many gamers preferring it for
its simulation style as opposed to FIFA’s arcade
feel. However, when positive reviews started com-
ing in for the new FIFA 09 game Konami sat up
and took notice. Their rivals had produced a game
that was not just on a par with Pro Evo, but had ac-
tually surpassed it. The Japanese company knew
they had to do something, so they did, they bought
the exclusive rights to the UEFA Champions
League licence to use in future Pro Evo games.
While that has been a nice feature (it is not in-
cluded on the PS2 version) it has not really been
enough to persuade people away from FIFA. The
gameplay in Pro Evo was always praised but has
never really evolved since the early days when it
was known as International Superstar Soccer.
The passing has improved on last years game but
some of the shooting is still a little off. The power
guage seems to have a mind of its own at times and
is not as immediate as one would like when trying
to take a snap shot on goal.
A new feature this season is the ‘Be A Legend’
mode, which is basically stolen from the FIFA ‘Be
A Pro’ mode. It is enjoyable enough and can be
quite time consuming. The idea is that you only
control one player in one position and you see the
game from a third person viewpoint. You start off
in a trial match for some unknown team and based
on your performance in that game you are offered a
contract by a real club. You then try and work your
way into the first team your club and gradually
mould yourself into one of the world’s great play-
ers.
Something Pro Evo has been criticised for in the
past by FIFA fans is that they have never had the
full licences for the Premier League, only featuring
two teams a season and making fake teams loosely
based on the rest. This season it’s Liverpool and
Man Utd’s turn, but the lack of any others can be
off putting. However, there are sufficient licences
for other nations, such as the whole of La Liga.
A solid effort without being spectacular. Konami
will have to up their game if they want to go top of
the tree again.
RATING: A NERVY 2-0 HOME WIN

56
QUIZ
Two footy fans pit their wits against each other to obtain bragging rights down the
pub. Our first encounter is a Manchester derby. But who will come out on top?
There’s only one way to find out...QUIZ!!!!
Colin Farrow Tom Bradshaw
Manchester Utd fan Manchester City fan
1. Who scored the win- Roberto Di Matteo Di Matteo
ning goal in the 1997 FA
Cup Final?
Yes Yes
2. Who was the manager Mick McCarthy Jack Charlton
of Ireland at the 1994
World Cup?
No Yes
3. By what scoreline did 2-1 2-1
Hull beat Arsenal by this
season? Yes Yes
4. How much did Liver- £8.5m No idea. Was it around
pool pay for Stan Colly- £6m?
Yes No
more in 1995?
5. What was the name of Le Mascot? It was Footix! He was a big
the mascot at France 98? cock (as in the bird)
No Yes
6. Which Italian team is Napoli Er, either Genoa or Napoli,
Maradona a legend at? i’ll say Napoli
Yes Yes
7. Who were the runners Czech Republic The Czech’s
up at Euro 96?
Yes Yes
8. Who is the current Unless he’s been sacked Dunga
coach of the Brazil na- yet it’s Dunga
tional side? Yes Yes
9. What was the last tro- The FA Cup in 2004, the Was it the FA Cup?
phy won by Arsenal? jammy gits!
Yes Yes
10. What is the capacity A lot. Isn’t it around Read this the other day, it’s
at the Camp Nou? 100,000? 95,000
No Yes
FINAL SCORE
7 9
46 www.onsidemag.com
STATS ALL FOLKS!
STATS ALL FOLKS!

PREMIERSHIP TABLE (as of 28/04/09)

P W D L F A GD PTS
1. Man Utd 33 24 5 4 61 23 38 77
2. Liverpool 34 21 11 2 66 26 40 74
3. Chelsea 34 21 8 5 56 20 36 71
4. Arsenal 34 18 11 5 60 32 28 65
5. Aston Villa 34 15 10 9 50 44 6 55
6. Everton 34 14 11 9 48 36 12 53
7. Fulham 34 12 11 11 34 28 6 47
8. West Ham 34 12 9 13 38 38 0 45
9. Man City 34 13 5 16 53 45 8 44
10. Tottenham 34 12 8 14 41 41 0 44
11. Wigan 33 11 8 14 31 38 -7 41
12. Stoke 34 10 9 15 33 49 -16 39
13. Bolton 34 11 5 18 40 51 -11 38
14. Portsmouth 34 9 11 14 35 50 -15 38
15. Blackburn 34 9 10 15 37 55 -18 37
16. Sunderland 34 9 8 17 31 46 -15 35
17. Hull 34 8 10 16 37 59 -22 34
18. Newcastle 34 6 13 15 37 53 -16 31
19. Middlesbrough 34 7 10 17 25 49 -24 31
20. West Brom 34 7 7 20 33 63 -30 28

CHAMPIONSHIP LEAGUE ONE LEAGUE TWO

P GD PTS P GD PTS P GD PTS
1. Wolves 45 27 87 1. Leicester 45 42 93 1. Brentford 45 27 82
2. Bir’ham 45 16 80 2. Peterboro 45 24 88 2. Wycombe 45 22 78
3. Sheff Utd 45 25 79 3. MK Dons 45 35 84 3. Exeter 45 14 76
4. Reading 45 33 77 4. Millwall 45 12 82 4. Bury 45 19 75
5. Cardiff 45 13 74 5. Leeds 45 25 81 5. Gillingham 45 2 72
6. Burnley 45 8 73 6. Scunthorpe 45 19 75 6. Rochdale 45 12 70
7. Preston 45 11 71 7. Tranmere 45 13 73 7. Dag & Red 45 25 68
8. Swansea 45 14 68 8. Southend 45 -5 68 8. Shrewsbury 45 16 66
9. Ipswich 45 8 63 9. Hud’field 45 -3 67 9. Bradford 45 9 64
10. Bristol C 45 4 61 10. Oldham 45 0 62 10. Che’field 45 7 63
11. QPR 45 -1 61 11. Walsall 45 -4 61 11. Morec’be 45 1 63
12. Sheff Wed 45 -8 58 12. Bristol R 45 15 60 12. Darlington 45 16 59
13. Doncaster 45 -10 58 13. Stockport 45 3 60 13. Lincoln 45 3 59
14. C Palace 45 -3 56 14. Colchester 45 -2 60 14. Rotherham 45 15 58
15. Watford 45 -6 55 15. Leyton O 45 -12 55 15. Aldershot 45 -23 51
16. Derby 45 -10 54 16. Swindon 45 -3 52 16. Accrington 45 -16 50
17. Coventry 45 -10 54 17. Yeovil 45 -23 51 17. Barnet 45 -17 48
18. Blackpool 45 -12 53 18. Hartlepool 45 -10 50 18. Macc’field 45 -32 46
19. Plymouth 45 -12 51 19. North’ton 45 -1 49 19. Port Vale 45 -23 45
20. N Forest 45 -17 50 20. Brighton 45 -16 49 20. Notts C 45 -21 44
21. Barnsley 45 -14 49 21. Carlisle 45 -15 47 21. Bo’mouth 45 4 43
22. Norwich 45 -11 46 22. Crewe 45 -20 46 22. Grimsby 45 -18 40
23. Soton 45 -21 45 23. Chelt’m 45 -38 39 23. Chester 45 -37 37
24. Charlton 45 -24 36 24. Hereford 45 -36 34 24. Luton 45 -5 26

47
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