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“Rose, she will keep our secret safe, I’ve seen it! You need to trust
Edward! He hasn’t put any of us at risk.” Alice responded promptly, and
much to my appreciation.
Her thoughts rambled on, but I tuned them with thoughts of my own.
Thoughts about how it’s only been 4 minutes since I had seen her last, yet I
missed her as much as I would if it’d been 4 weeks. I could hardly wait for
night to fall, to be back in her room—to feel the painful burn in my throat
as I would occasionally pull in a deep breath in the attempt to make
myself, one day, ignore it—to watch her sleep, and dream… Hopefully
about me.
I just kept repeating what Emmett had told me earlier… “Rose’ll get
over it. It was bound to happen anyway”
I decided to go for a run just to get out of the house, and away from
all the noise. As I entered the town of Sappho, I spotted a couple deer
grazing in a field nearby. Although I wasn’t terribly thirsty, I figured I
might as well take the opportunity to eat, taking off any potential edge of
hunger that may at any time appear.
I tried to not track the time too closely, thinking of the saying a
watched pot never boils. I took my time with the last deer since I was not
in any rush to get back home. There were still a couple of hours left before
the day would inevitably hand itself over to the night.
I’m so ecstatic for Edward. It’s time he falls in love, he truly deserves
it. It amazes me that it took so long. He’s such a meritorious man.
Bella’s sleeping body lay sprawled out, and twisted under only half
of her covers. Her hair was tangled and outspread on the pillows, a sure
sign of restlessness.
“Edward,”
She tossed around, and then threw her arm over her head. Unable to
help myself, I stepped around to the right side of her bed with a dire need
to see her face. The expression she had looked incredibly distraught. Ugh,
what I wouldn’t give to just be able to hear her thoughts, to see what she
was dreaming of, and why she kept telling me not to leave. The curiosity
was almost agonizing.
She sighed after a short time, and rolled to her other side. This
position didn’t last too long, as she began to lean onto her back. She
suddenly coughed, and opened her eyes. I felt a quick layer of panic wash
over me, afraid she would see me standing beside her bed, but I was able to
retreat from her view immediately.
She laid there for a minute and slowly drifted back to sleep. This
pattern repeated itself numerous times, causing me to keep an even safer
distance. I could not be seen standing in her room.
It was around 4am, and Bella had once again awoken from her
restless sleep. She rubbed her eyes, and then cupped her hands over her
mouth as she yawned. Her eyes blinked a handful of times, and she let out
a few loud exhales. She rolled back to her side, and closed her eyes, this
time falling into a deep, dreamless sleep. I sat by the window and listened
to her breathe, occasionally inhaling whenever she exhaled.
As the sun came up, I took in one last deep breath of her potent scent,
and I ducked out the window. I ran back to my house, with the same speed
I ran to Bella’s with, anxious to drive right back to pick her up for school.
When I got home, Carlisle had already left for work, and Esme was tidying
up the already spotless house. Alice and Jasper were just returning from
their overnight hunting peregrination, while Rosalie and Emmett were
undoubtedly embracing each other’s bodies until the time came to leave for
school.
Emmett or Alice must have calmed Rose down while I was gone; not
one of her thoughts pertained to Bella or me.
I listened closely.
“Yes, Dad?”
“Are you still set on going to Seattle?” I really wish she wouldn’t…
“And you’re sure you can’t make it back in time for the dance?”
“I’m not going to the dance, Dad.” she replied, trying to sound firm.
Charlie’s thoughts were dead on. I had taken notice. Perhaps more
than any other boy was ever capable of, and I was beyond interested. I was
in love. And she was interested in return. I wondered when that fact would
cease to astonish me.
Charlie left, and I took his place in the driveway to wait for Bella.
She closed the door behind her, leaving the deadbolt unlocked. The crime
rate around this town was notably low, so the lock on the doorknob would
certainly suffice.
She walked to the car, pausing slightly before getting in. She wore a
nicer fitting shirt today; a brown turtleneck, and a pair of jeans. To any
other pair of eyes it would be a bland outfit. But to me, it looked amazing
on her. I smiled as she got in.
“Good morning.” I said with a smooth voice. “How are you today?”
I intentionally asked this, hoping to hear what caused her restless
night.
“So what did you do last night?” she asked me, forgetting that she
had her turn yesterday. I kindly laughed at that fact.
“Oh, that’s right. What do you want to know?” she asked with a
curious look on her face.
Thinking back to last night when I was in her room, looking at the
different colors, I wanted to know minor facts. “What’s your favorite
color?”
She rolled her eyes, but answered. “It changes from day to day.”
I stared into her eyes, hoping to find a deeper answer, but I found
nothing else. She indubitably didn’t like this climate. “You’re right,” I
admitted. “Brown is warm.”
I hesitantly reached over and swept the portion of her hair back over
her shoulder. I didn’t like having to look through it in order to see her
flawless face.
I pulled into a parking spot and cut the engine. I turned to look at
Bella, prepared with another question. “What music is in your CD player
right now?”
As she named the band on the CD Phil gave her, I smiled and opened
up the compartment I used to hold my CD’s. I pulled out the one she
named, and handed it to her.
“Debussy to this?” I said, raising an eyebrow.
She examined the CD, mostly staring at the cover art. Her eyes were
looking down the whole time.
She answered almost before I had time to finish asking the question.
“Topaz.”
She cleared her throat, and shook her head. “Um… I didn’t mean to
say Topaz,” she said shyly.
“Okay, what did you mean to say?” I asked to encourage her answer.
She let out a flustered breath, but had no answer to follow it.
Look away, I thought to myself. And so I did just that as I waited for
her response.
“It’s the color of your eyes today,” she confessed, after a brief pause.
She was starring down at her hands, which were nervously playing with a
piece of her hair. “I suppose if you asked me in two weeks I’d say onyx.”
I didn’t want to linger on that one subject any longer; I didn’t want
her to feel embarrassment anymore. So I moved right along with the next
question. “What kinds of flower do you prefer?”
“Never. I don’t have the right coordination for it. I suppose I have
my mom to thank for that.” She didn’t seem to be too upset over the fact
she couldn’t dance.
A smile pulled at the corners of my mouth, and I lightly laughed at
the image of Bella’s lamentable attempt to dance. It would be fascinating
to watch, indeed.
Mr. Banner walked into the classroom, pushing in front of him the
ancient VCR and TV in which we would continue to watch Lorenzo’s Oil
on. He reached to shut off the lights, and I slowly moved my chair away
from Bella, hoping to control my urge to be closer than I knew I should be.
The excitement in the room was much like yesterday, although not
one of the students really cared about watching this movie. Their thoughts
were now filling my hearing, as I wasn’t tuning them out with my
conversation with Bella anymore.
Ah, man! So glad we don’t need to take notes over this crap…I’m
listening to my iPod.
I purposely tried to tune Mike out after that. His thoughts agitated me
continually.
Her eyes were focused on the movie throughout the entire class. As I
bounced between different minds, and looked around at the students, I
realized she was the only one who seemingly watched the entire showing.
I didn’t like not being able to talk to her. She was hidden behind the
hair that had fallen around her face, forcing me to flip through the recent
images I had of her in my mind. Even though she was right there—one and
a half feet away from me—she felt distant.
Our walk to her gym class was silent, except for the array of thoughts
I was hearing. I would trade the ability to read every mind in this place for
the ability to just read hers. It was such a secretive place, and I wanted so
badly to get a peek inside. Especially now. What thoughts were going
through her mind at this very moment?
I lifted my hand and touched the back of it to the side of her face, and
slowly stroked it once from her temple to her chin. The heat from her body
radiated against my skin, and I felt the urge to be closer again. Enough, I
ordered myself. I still could not make any mistakes with her.
We entered the room and took our normal seats in front of Ben
Cheney. The room was noisy as usual, only I got it twice as bad as the rest
of the kids in here. With one voice being just as loud as the other, I
sometimes wasn’t sure when they were being spoken as opposed to when
they were just someone’s thoughts.
Maybe Mrs. Goff won’t show up to class today, and we’ll get to have
a free hour to do anything we want!…
Bingo.
Not only did she say yes, but she couldn’t stop smiling when I
asked… Cullen was definitely right! She likes me! Man, I should thank
him…
I didn’t need a thank you from Ben. I did it more for Angela’s sake
than his. But it was bound to have happened sooner or later; I just assisted
to make it happen sooner and I was happy with myself for that.
Now that that was accomplished, I searched the voices until I found
the one I dreaded the most. Mike was playing badminton by himself today.
The coach must have decided it was safer if Bella sat out. I was thankful.
This way I wouldn’t be concerned for the entire duration of my Spanish
class if she was okay or not.
Mrs. Goff allowed me to leave the class early because I had finished
each in-class assignment that she had handed to me. I headed towards the
gym in anticipation to once again be with Bella.
She walked out of the gym looking in my direction, and smiled wide
as soon as she saw me standing there. I couldn’t help but smile just a wide
in return.
I kept the questions easy during the drive to Charlie’s, just giving
enough of a response to keep the words flowing from her mouth. I loved
listening to what she had to say, she was so intriguing.
We pulled into her driveway, but I wasn’t about to let the
conversation stop. I turned off the ignition, and we sat in the car while the
rain suddenly pelted down around us.
She closed her eyes, as if to take herself back there. “I miss the smell
of the creosote bushes that filled the air…”
“It’s bigger than the one I have here… probably doubled in size at
least,” she began describing it to me. “I had a lot more stuff in that room,
since I lived there full-time. There’s actually still too much pointless stuff
shoved in there. It could never all properly fit anywhere, making my room
look constantly cluttered. But it was a comfortable clutter to me. I knew
where things were. To me it had an order, but to my mom it was just a
mess.”
“Are you finished?” she asked, with a relieved tone in her voice.
“Charlie!” she shouted, forgetting about the time. She looked out the
window at the now darkened sky, and then back at the clock in my car.
“How late is it?” she wondered out loud.
“Certainly not! I told you I wasn’t done, didn’t I?” I said to her in a
teasing manner.
Just as I touched the door handle, a couple new voices came into
play. Both were unfamiliar voices, but struck my attention. It started out
with a few thoughts, and then proceeded into a conversation. I paused real
fast to listen to it.
Ugh, I really don’t want to get into this with him again. “Yeah, Dad,
I guess.” the younger voice answered.
I pulled on the handle and pushed open the door for her, quickly
retreating my arm back to my side in a sudden rush to leave. Too late. Billy
Black and his son Jacob pulled up to the curb, facing towards us.
Bella stepped out of the car and into the heavy rain. She stared into
the other vehicle trying to figure out who it was.