Dubord 1 Kierstin Dubord Mr.

Newman English: Rhetoric 101 22 November 2013 Mothers Cant Do It All About half of families in today's society consist of a single parent household, usually a mother. Fathers are becoming less and less prominent in family roles. Where fathers once traditionally provided for the family, mothers are starting to do so, too. Mothers are becoming educated and no longer need a man for financial stability, therefor more mothers are separating from fathers who aren't needed. Because of this the role of a father is being diminished to next to nothing. This has posed questions to the roles fathers play in modern families if one of their most traditional roles of providing money for the family is no longer needed. Although some families work best without a father figure, fathers offer different aspects to the family than mothers do and are necessary in most circumstances to raise a happy child. Fathers have evolved to be much more than just the financial provider of the family. Brad Harrington, a research professor in the Carroll School of Management, conducted a study that revealed fathers found it more important to spend time with their children and be role models to them than to be the primary provider of the family. Fathers not only provide financial stability, but now they provide emotional support and overall security to their children. Try as they might, mothers cannot provide everything for their child by themselves. Parenting is a two person job, and a child benefits greatly when two parents are present. A father is an important role model in a child's life. Children look up to their father's success, crave his love and attention, and need the

Dubord 2 stability of two parents working together to provide the best life possible for their children. This is something children thrive off of. Fatherless families are becoming more common in the American household. With 60% of college graduates being females (Harrington), mothers are now being able to provide for their children and not need support from the father. Single mothers believe they can be both a mother and a father to their children. Traditionally, mothers had roles of taking care of the house and children, while the fathers disciplined and provided financial stability for the family. Now that there is no need for this, woman are making the choices to be single mothers. With more fathers being less in the picture, this leaves many people to wonder about the effect this has on children. There have been studies that show fatherless children are more likely to end up living in poverty, drop out of school, become teenage parents, or even end up addicted drugs. While this might be true for some fatherless children, it is not true for all. In my own experience, being raised in a single parent home has been tough; it has not been unsuccessful, but it has been difficult. I strongly believe two loving, working parents are needed for a child to have everything they need material based and emotional based. Growing up without my biological father, or even a father figure at all, has left me feeling as if something is missing in my life. It has also left my small family struggling to get by. In 25% of U.S. households consisting of a single mother, the yearly income is on average $23,000 a year (Harrington). This leaves children of single mothers living at or below poverty level. The affect this has on children is immense and can affect a child greatly. Living in a single parent household leaves the children with less opportunities due to their financial struggle. Most fatherless children drop out of school, become teenage parents or turn to drugs. While this may not solely be due to living in a single parent household, it is common to see. If there was a

Dubord 3 second working parent, the child wouldn't be living in poverty and dealing with such ills. Juli Slattery, the co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, brings up another point that there is just some aspects a father brings to a family that a mother cannot fulfill alone. Two of those aspects that Slattery talks about are security and a fathers blessing. If a child never receives a fathers blessing, they may unconsciously spend a lifetime searching for it (Slattery). Although a mother can make her child feel secure and give them blessings by herself, it is just not the same as when a father does it. Traditionally, fathers are the head of the family, they protect the family, provide for the family, and they just have a sense of power to them to hold a family together. If a mother is all alone, a child can be left feeling unprotected and out of control. Although I believe children need two parents in a home, some people argue that children can do just fine in a single parent home if there is support from families and enough caring adults in the mix (Mattes). According to Mattes, a psychotherapist and founder of Single Mothers by Choice, children are able to connect to other adults in their livescoaches, teachers, grandparentsthat they dont necessarily need a father in their life because theyre able to get by with the support of others. Michele Walden, assistant professor of journalism at Northwestern University and an author, says she raised all three of her sons by herself and she swears that all children raised by single mothers are not doomed. She argues there have been plenty of successful men raised without fathers, therefor a father is not necessary for a successful child. While it is possible for a single mother to raise a child on her own just fine, it is still important that children have fathers. Even in such situations of less than heroic fathers, a stepfather or other male role model will suffice if the biological father cant be present. But what's important is that a child has two positive role models in their life to take care of them and give them the best life possible. W. Bradford Wilcox, the author of Gender and Parenthood:

Dubord 4 Biological and Social Scientific Perspectives, believes children need fathers to excel. Although he believes children raised without fathers can turn out just fine, on average girls and boys are more likely to do better in school and stay out of trouble when there is a father present that takes their childs success seriously (Wilcox). Not to say that a mother on her own cannot keep her children out of trouble, but its just more likely with two active parents to keep their children on track than for a single mother to do it all by herself. Children are fragile creatures brought into this world wanting nothing more than to be loved and cared for properly. They thrive off of both their parents and cannot afford to be without either one of them. A two parent household helps a child to feel loved, be properly cared for, and have all the things it needs to be successful. Parents fight for their kids to have everything that makes them happy and healthy, so why not fight for children to have two parents that provide the world for them?

Dubord 5 Works Cited Harrington, Brad. "Behind the Data." Room for Debate. New York Times Company, 3 June 2013. Web. 12 Nov. 2013. Mattes, Jane. "Valuable, but Not Indispensable." Room for Debate. New York Times Company, 4 June 2013. Web. 12 Nov. 2013. Slattery, Juli. "Mom and Dad Fill Different Roles." Room for Debate. New York Times Company, 29 July 2013. Web. 12 Nov. 2013. Weldon, Michele. "When Children Are Better off Fatherlesss." Room for Debate. New York Times Company, 3 June 2013. Web. 12 Nov. 2013. Wilcox, W. Bradford. "Fathers Are Not Fungible." Room for Debate. New York Times Company, 5 June 2013. Web. 12 Nov. 2013.