CONFESSIONS OF AN AGE-GROUPER

BY HOLLY BENNETT

THE RENEWBIE
50 DECEMBER 2012

THE JOYS OF A PERSONAL TRIATHLON RENAISSANCE

I had a thing or two to learn when I was first introduced to triathlon, and a thing or two to take care of in order to fit in. One day, inspired by my observations of others, I phoned my then-husbandalready an accomplished triathleteat work. Um, Id like to shave my legs. Will you tell me what to do? Until that day I had never run a razor across my calves. No, I was not a child bride. We lived in Santa Cruz, Calif., where all sort of hippie behavior is de rigueur, and Ill admit to having been a bit of a free spirit in my younger years. But more so, my legs were barely dusted with blond by the time I was in my late 20s. Im what youd call a late bloomer. Heck, Im over 40 now and Im still waiting for my girls to fully develop! But to this day, even in entirely unshorn glory, I wouldnt sport enough hair on my legs to be obvious. Yet as a budding triathlete, I was bound and determined to assimilate to my newfound tribe, and if that meant a token leg shave, I was all in.

HUNTER KING

On the other end of the line, my husband stied a laugh and patiently explained how to handle his razor and Barbasol. Fast-forward 15 years and Id classify myself as a veteran triathlete. Ive logged more races than I can remember, and I wouldnt dare let my legs go shaggy now. Im condent in my knowledge of what to do and how to do it in this somewhat wacky sport. And yet, having been sidelined by injuries and other priorities for some time now, its been a while since Ive actually raced. Thus, as I look toward tackling the iron distance again in 2013, and hopefully having a go at some other races sprinkled between now and then, Im having a bit of a personal triathlon renaissance. Im experiencing afresh some of the joys of just starting out in the sport. Im a full-edged renewbie! Now Im normally a slow swimmer, but in my current out-of-shape state I struggle more than ever in the pool. Because of this I often end up as Masters lane mates with people fairly new to organized swimming and triathlon. And although some of the questions and behaviors of beginners can be awkward (at times even annoying), theyre also awesome in their innocence. One woman recently tapped my shoulder as we nished a set. Is it possible, she asked shyly, to bonk while swimming? Of course! I answered, and suggested that she pack a Gu with her pool gear, happy to have a helpful hint to share. Look, Ive bonked in a shopping mall while on a retail binge, forgetting to pay proper attention to my nutrition needs. Never, ever stray far from food if you intend to succeed as an endurance athlete. A few oddballs in the slow lane do sometimes try my patience, however. I was at a workout last week where we ticked o a series of 12 50m eorts, split into four rounds of three at a slow pace, then medium, then fast. Partway through, the coach mentioned to one of my lane partners that she should increase her sprint eorts, creating a more signicant gap between her three speeds. Sprint? said the woman. I thought you said go fast? Then she turned to me for validation: She said fast didnt she? Not sprint? The confused woman pushed o the wall and the coach and I looked at one another with Huh? written across both our faces. As a side note, Ill mention that this woman shaved neither her legs nor her underarmsand shes no downy blonde. And while Im busy beating dead the horse of personal hygiene, may I just say that nothing, nothing is more troubling than the unshaven men that inhabit the slow lane? Now that Im a smoothskin addict, I have to refrain from giv52 DECEMBER 2012

ing them my unsolicited advice. Because believe me, there is nothing worse than being underwater and passing a wet and wooly man-pelt a mere six inches from ones goggles. But I digress. I was writing about the reasons why I love beginners. Let me tell you about a friend of mine who is countering a midlife crisis with a mastery of triathlon newbie-ness. Ill call him Dan, because thats his real name. Dan embodies everything inspirational about rst discovering the sport, and its refreshing, after oh-so-many years of my own involvement, to witness. Hes wide-eyed with awe at the changes to his health and physique. He embraces an in-your-face attitude toward the aging process. Hes uncovering a clear cache of natural talent. And he exhibits childlike amazement (and lustful longing) for every gizmo and gadget known to the multisport consumer market. Dan puts forth an endless supply of enthusiasm along with an array of questions about all things swim, bike, run, recovery, transition and nutrition. And he proudly shares the milestones of his progress. First there was this Facebook post: I just trotted out 20 MILES, doubling my previous longest run. Who was I to tell him that a leap from 10 to 20 miles might not be the smartest strategy? After all, he did so successfully just two weeks out from his rst Ironman 70.3, and his race went o without a hitch. Maybe my old-school knowledge of slow and steady gains is outdated. Dan felt that running 20 miles would make 13.1 seem easy, and apparently he was right. Score one for the rookie! Then came Facebook post No. 2: Today I reached a whole new level in the world of triathlon. I managedthrough intense concentrationto forgo social mores and urinate in my shorts two times on a 60-mile ride, and once on a half-hour run afterward, all while maintaining forward progress. No more time-consuming mid-race Porta-potty stops for me! Well OK then. Practice makes perfect, right? And while I would generally recommend that weeing on oneself is one thing best saved for race day, maybe I have something to learn from Dan. I for one have failed to perfect the art of peeing mid-ride, but I certainly havent practiced much. Granted, this is an easier trick for guys, with their built-in point-and-shoot mechanism. Ive always struggled to wet my pants, but maybe I just need to try harder. And what better time to give it a whirl than when Im refreshing my role in the triathlon universe? After all, if anyone questions my motive for tinkling in the midst of training, I can easily excuse myself as a brand spanking renewbie.

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