Improving Sentences: An Eight-Step Strategy

1. 2. !. &. (. ). -. /. Read the sentence and try to hear the problem. If you find an error eliminate A. "efore you loo# at the ans$er choices figure out ho$ to fi% the error. 'ind the correction that most closely matches yours. If no correction matches eliminate ans$ers that repeat the error or contain ne$ errors. If you*re still stumped reach into your bag of tric#s +more on those soon,. .lug your ans$er bac# into the sentence to chec# it. If you*re still stumped0cut guess and run.

Alright no$ it*s time to put that e%citing eight-step process into action. "elo$ you*ll see a sample problem that $e solve $ith the eight-step method e%plaining each of the steps along the $ay:
Jenna was awarded the medal not for her academic success or her skill on the soccer field, but for her being a participant in gym class . (A) but for her being a participant in gym class (B) the reason being for her participation in gym class (C) the reason was her participating in gym class (D) but for her being participation willing in gym class (!) but for her participation in gym class

Step 1: Read the sentence and try to hear the problem.

As $e have discussed relying on your ear e%clusively is ris#y on the SA1 2riting section. 1he $riters of the SA1 #no$ most students $ill listen for $hat sounds right to them but often $hat sounds right is actually $rong. 1hat*s because using 3ust your ear most often means you*re using spo#en English as your guide. Remember that this section of the SA1 tests your #no$ledge of standard written English. In this chapter $e reinforce your understanding of the rules of standard $ritten English. 4no$ing the rules gives you a strong foundation against $hich to chec# the signals your ear gives you that something in the sentence is $rong. In the sample sentence above you might immediately notice the combined problem of $ordiness and faulty parallelism0the phrase but for her being a participant should be re$ritten in a more compact form in $hich all the different components of the sentence align or flo$ together correctly +more on parallelism belo$,. Even if you don*t come up $ith the specific term wordiness you might have the sense that something about the underlined part is vague and a bit convoluted. It*s fine if you can*t thin# of the e%act term that describes the problem. A general sense that something is $rong $ill go a long $ay. 5ust detecting the presence of an error allo$s you to cut ans$er choice A $hich tips the guessing odds in your favor. 6ore on that in step 2.

Step 2: If you find an error, eliminate A.

If you*re certain that there*s an error some$here in the underlined part of the sentence you can eliminate A since A always repeats the underlined part word for word. Again you $on*t need to #no$ the e%act term for the error in order to eliminate A. 1he fine art of A elimination gives you a great advantage on Improving Sentences 7uestions. 8ere*s $hy: 9utting A means something more than 3ust :one do$n four to go.; Even if the other four ans$ers loo# li#e gibberish to you cutting A gives you the green light to guess. As $e e%plain in the introduction to this boo# the SA1 does not contain a guessing :penalty.; 1he test is set up to

discourage totally random guessing but to re$ard educated guessing. If you can eliminate even one ans$er choice the ans$er you choose becomes an educated guess0tipping the odds in your favor.

Step 3: Before you look at the ans er choices, fi!ure out ho the error.

to fi"

<nce you*ve figured out the problem in the underlined part of the sentence say to yourself +silently0 you don*t $ant to reveal your genius to other test-ta#ers in the room,: :1his $ould be a better sentence if it read something li#e Jenna was awarded the medal not for her academic success or her skill on the soccer field, but for participating in gym class.; 1hat version conveys the right information but doesn*t ta#e up unnecessary space. 8ave you ever noticed that if you repeat a normal everyday $ord li#e house over and over it starts to seem odd= 1hat*s e%actly $hat the ans$er choices of Improving Sentences 7uestions $ill do to you. If you go right to the ans$er choices and read through them one by one by the time you get to # the ans$ers $ill all sound e7ually confusing and $rong. Al$ays approach the ans$er choices $ith a plan $hich is $hat you thin# sounds correct. If you start loo#ing at the ans$er choices $ith no idea of $hat you*re loo#ing for it*s possible all the ans$ers $ill sound funny and incorrect.

Step $: %ind the correction that most closely matches yours.

>et*s say your correction reads Jenna was awarded the medal not for her academic success or her skill on the soccer field, but for participating in gym class . ?o$ loo# at the remaining ans$er choices and see $hich one most closely matches your correction:
(A) (B) (C) (D) (!) but the the but but for her being a participant in gym class reason being for her participation in gym class reason was her participating in gym class for her being participation willing in gym class for her participation in gym class

& loo#s most li#e the ans$er you came up $ith before loo#ing. It*s not e%actly li#e your prepared ans$er0it uses her participation instead of for participating0but it*s very close. Rarely $ill an ans$er choice exactly match the one you generated on your o$n $hich is fine. 1he purpose of preparing your o$n ans$er first is not to find an exact match in the ans$er choices but to have an idea of $hat is correct before you start reading the choices. If you find an ans$er that matches yours a$esome. <n$ard to the ne%t 7uestion. Sometimes though you may not be totally sure $hether any of the ans$er choices matches yours closely enough. In that case move to step (.

Step ': If no correction matches, eliminate ans ers that repeat the error or contain ne errors.
@ou*ll usually see a fe$ ans$er choices that actually repeat the mista#e. <thers might fi% the original mista#e but in the process add a ne$ error to the mi%. Suppose you $eren*t certain that & matched your prepared ans$er closely enough. In that case you $ould read through the ans$er choices and try to determine if they repeated the first mista#e or contained a ne$ one. Ans$er choice B has a problem similar to that of the original sentence. It says the reason being $hich is a $ordy phrase. 6ean$hile # creates a ne$ problem: the $ord participating is a gerund but should be a noun. ( repeats the original mista#e repeating the phrase but for her beingA it also introduces a ne$ problem by using the strange phrase participation-willing. <nly & neither repeats the original problem nor contains a ne$ one.

Step ): If still stumped, reach into your ba! of tricks.

Since you*ve already got & as a pretty solid ans$er from step ( there*s no need to delve into the bag of Improving Sentences tric#s 3ust yet. So $e*re going to s#ip step ) for no$ and go right to step -. At the end of the chapter is a section on $hich tric#s to use to beat Improving Sentences 7uestions $hen you*re in a pinch.

Step *: +lu! your ans er back into the sentence to check it.
.lug the ans$er bac# into the sentence to chec# ho$ $ell it $or#s.
Jenna was awarded the medal not for her academic success or her skill on the soccer field, but for her participation in gym class.

Sounds good. Sounds right.

Step ,: If you-re still stumped.cut, !uess, and run.

If you can*t decide on an ans$er choice to improve the sentence*s error you*ve got t$o choices. 'irst if you*re able to cut at least one ans$er choice you should al$ays guess. If you*ve got a strong hunch that the sentence contains an error but you 3ust can*t pinpoint it cut A and guess. 1he guess odds tip in your favor if you can eliminate at least one choice so don*t $orry about choosing randomly from among the four remaining choices: B # ( or &. If you don*t #no$ for sure if the sentence contains an error and you*ve got no clue $hich ans$er choice might solve the error you should leave the 7uestion blan# and move on to another 7uestion you can ans$er confidently and 7uic#ly. Every minute counts. Bon*t beat yourself up over an e%tra tough 7uestion. Cse either of the strategies described in step - and move on pronto.