F) DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE This is a normal situation in the workplace.

In there, we will mix and find various type of people. Someone who are fussy, bossy, busybody and annoying. It is not unincluded also the type of person who are workaholic, courtegeous and energytic. For better or worse, what goes on at the work comprises the most significant portion of your social life. We mostly will spend more time with coworkers than we do with friends outside work, and no wonder if sometimes we think that we had spend more time at our job than our family. So, by mastering the technique of understanding various personality traits and group dynamics will make our life a lot less stressful. UNDERSTAND PROBLEM PERSONALITY There are a minor percentage group of people who like to take our best behaviour as a weakness to be exploited. Show them otherwise. The person who treats others with respects is a walking refutation of social cheaters. The hothead, the rumormonger, the malcontent and the Machiavelli are the ones who show that they are weak. By acting the way they do, they betray their own belief that they can succed. i. THE HOTHEAD The hotheads can be seen their personality by the name of hot itself. They have a very hard time to control their tempers. Most hotheads are embarrassed by their bad tempers and after flailing away for five minutes, they will apologize. The way to deal with a hothead is to let him blow his stack. Suggest that he vent in his office. This suggestion wont go down well with the hothea d, because he probably requires an audience. ii. THE RUMORMONGER The rumormonger is a different story. She lives on gossip, using it to skewer others and to advance her own career. She is trouble for you because you may become the subject of some juicy bit of her gossip.

When a rumormongers attention turns to some salacious tidbit regarding you, you have only a strategy; comfort her. Your are under no obligation to comfort her if the gossip is about someone else, although you may want to come to the defense of a friend or a colleague. But if the gossip is about you, privately confront the rumormonger because you dont want to embarass her and also not to let the others to hear her recant.

iii.

THE CREDIT HOG AND THIEF The credit hog tries to take all the credit when some is due to others. The credit thief takes any credit he can find, even when it belongs to someone else.

Dealing with either requires the same skill; ensure that you get the credit you deserve. This is easier said than done sometimes, but you can do. A private chat, in which you point out that other people helped on the project and deserve credit, sometimes works. The last thing that we can do is talk to the superior and ask them what to do.

iv.

THE BRAGGART The person who brags or name-drops can be incridibly annoying. When you look closer at this personality type, you normally see an insecure person who exhibits a lack of self-esteem and self-confidence by trying to impress oters with their accomplishments, their travel, or the people they know. Bragging also can be form of intimidation.

You may avoid the braggart, but the best approach is to respond with short comments. Then, you can change the subject or ask a question which is unrelated to the braggarts comments. Try your best not to courage her to continue bragging if you are not really interested.

v.

THE BULLY The bully tries to threaten you into doing things you had rather not to do and are not required to do. The only way to deal with a bully is to stand up to him on the first occasion and continue standing up to him. The problem usually

is that you are so astonished by what he is doing taht you cannot think of a snappy comeback.

vi.

THE MANIPULATOR The manipulator tells half-truths. She lies; she reveals only what she thinks is in interest to reveal; she routinely conceals information from you. The manipulator focuses on others weakness and tries to take advantages of those weakness to make herself look better.

There are several tips that can be used to deal with this type of people. Firstly, if the manipulator tries to get you to do something that you think is against policy, put her off long enough to check on the policy yourself. Second, if they try to slide something unwanted past your team, challenge her in public to defend her suggestion. Third, if they succeed in getting you to do something that you know is a mistake or is against your interest, put the facts in writing, and submit them to the proper manager.

vii.

THE MALCONTENT It is the kind of person who, when you say Good morning, accuses you of being

friendly because you secretly hate him. His responses so far from the norm that you cannot anticipate them. If a malcontents slides into manipulation or bullying to feed his preserve happiness in restatement, action probably is required. But the best defense against manipulation and bullying is blithe disregard of the attempts to goad you into doing something you will regret. In the simple way we can say, just ignore them. viii. THE MACHIAVELLI

The Machiavelli is your worst enemy, because she wants power and nothing but power. Worse, she is smart, calculating and tenacious. She will adopt whatever pose she needs to do so she can get more power. The advices is, stay away from her. Most Machiavellis self-destruct and those who do not poison to you. The truth is that most Machiavellis are pretenders.

15 TIPS FOR DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

Here are some tips for dealing with a difficult person or negative message:

Forgive What would the Dali Lama do if he was in the situation? He would most likely forgive. Remember that at our very core, we are good, but our judgment becomes clouded and we may say hurtful things. Ask yourself, What is it about this situation or person that I can seek to understand and forgive? Wait it Out What is helpful is inserting time to allow ourselves to cool off. You can write the emotionally charged email to the person, just dont send it off. Wait until youve cooled off before responding, if you choose to respond at all. Does it really matter if I am right? Sometimes we respond with the intention of defending the side we took a position on. If you find yourself arguing for the sake of being right, ask Does it matter if I am right? If yes, then ask Why do I need to be right? What will I gain? Dont Respond Many times when a person initiates a negative message or difficult attitude, they are trying to trigger a response from you. When we react, we are actually giving them what they want. Lets stop the cycle of negative snowballing and sell them short on what theyre looking for; dont bother responding. Stop Talking About It When you have a problem or a conflict in your life, dont you find that people just love talking about it? We end up repeating the story to anyone wholl listen. We express how much we hate the situation or person. What we fail to recognize in these moments is that the more we talk about something, the more of that thing well notice. Example, the more we talk about how much we dislike a person, the more hate we will feel towards them and the more well notice things about them that we dislike. Stop

giving it energy, stop thinking about it, and stop talking about it. Do your best to not repeat the story to others. Be In Their Shoes As clich as this may sound, we tend to forget that we become blindsided in the situation. Try putting yourself in their position and consider how you may have hurt their feelings. This understanding will give you a new perspective on becoming rational again, and may help you develop compassion for the other person. Look for the Lessons No situation is ever lost if we can take away from it some lessons that will help us grow and become a better person. Regardless of how negative a scenario may appear, there is always a hidden gift in the form of a lesson. Find the lesson. Choose to Eliminate Negative People In Your Life Negative people can be a source of energy drain. And deeply unhappy people will want to bring you down emotionally, so that they are not down there alone. Be aware of this. Unless you have a lot of time on your hands and do not mind the energy drain, you are recommended to cut them off from your life. Cut them out by avoiding interactions with them as much as possible. Remember that you have the choice to commit to being surrounded by people who have the qualities you admire: optimistic, positive, peaceful and encouraging people. Become the Observer When we practice becoming the observer of our feelings, our thoughts and the situation, we separate ourselves away from the emotions. Instead of identifying with the emotions and letting them consume us, we observe them with clarity and detachment. When you find yourself identifying with emotions and thoughts, bring your focus on your breathe. Go for a Run Or a swim, or some other workout. Physical exercise can help to release the negative and excess energy in us. Use exercise as a tool to clear your mind and release built up negative energy.

Worst Case Scenario Ask yourself two questions, If I do not respond, what is the worst thing that can result from it?, If I do respond, what is the worst thing that can result from it? Answering these questions often adds perspectives to the situation, and youll realize that nothing good will come out of reacting. Your energy will be wasted, and your inner space disturbed. Avoid Heated Discussions When were emotionally charged, we are so much in our heads that we argue out of an impulse to be right, to defend ourselves, for the sake of our egos. Rationality and resolution can rarely arise out of these discussions. If a discussion is necessary, wait until everyone has cooled off before diving into one. Most Important List out things in your life most important to you. Then ask yourself, Will a reaction to this person contribute to the things that matter most to me? Pour Honey This doesnt always work, but sometimes catches people off guard when theyre trying to Pour Poison on you. Compliment the other person for something they did well, tell them youve learned something new through interacting with them, and maybe offer to become friends. Remember to be genuine. You might have to dig deep to find something that you appreciate about this person. Express It Take out some scrap paper and dump all the random and negative thoughts out of you by writing freely without editing. Continue to do so until you have nothing else to say. Now, roll the paper up into a ball, close your eyes and visualize that all the negative energy is now inside that paper ball. Toss the paper ball in the trash. Let it go!

Ref: http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/dealing-with-difficult-people/
http://www.timethoughts.com/stress/definition-of-stress.htm http://dying.about.com/od/glossary/g/stress.htm http://www.lifepositive.com/mind/psychology/stress/stress-at-work.asp

http://lifestyle.iloveindia.com/lounge/how-to-handle-stress-at-work-5760.html

HANDLING STRESS Stress at work is a relatively new phenomenon of modern lifestyles. The nature of work has gone through drastic changes over the last century and it is still changing at whirlwind speed. They have touched almost all professions, starting from an artist to a surgeon, or a commercial pilot to a sales executive. With change comes stress, inevitably. Professional stress or job stress poses a threat to physical health. Work related stress in the life of organized workers, consequently, affects the health of organizations. WHAT IS STRESS? Stress is the body's reaction to a change that requires a physical, mental or emotional adjustment or response. Stress can come from any situation or thought that makes you feel frustrated, angry, nervous, or anxious. Stress is caused by an existing stress-causing factor or "stressor." Dealing with a serious illness or caring for someone who is can cause a great deal of stress. Job stress is a chronic disease caused by conditions in the workplace that negatively affect an individual`s performance and/or overall well-being of his body and mind. One or more of a host of physical and mental illnesses manifests job stress. In some cases, job stress can be disabling. In chronic cases a psychiatric consultation is usually required to validate the reason and degree ofwork related stress.

Working on a project on stress at work, Andy Ellis, Ruskin College, Oxford, UK, has shown in a chart how stress can adversely affect an employee`s performance. In the early stages job stresscan `rev up` the body and enhance performance in the workplace, thus the term `I perform better under pressure`. However, if this condition is allowed to go unchecked and the body is revved up further, the performance ultimately declines and the person`s health degenerates.

TYPE OF STRESS Depending on the stressors and the types of changes or events we are dealing with, stress can manifest itself physically, emotionally and/or mentally. Physical This occurs when the body as a whole starts to suffer as a result of a stressful situation. Symptoms can manifest in a variety of ways and vary in their seriousness. The most common physical symptom is headaches because stress causes people to unconsciously tense their neck, forehead and shoulder muscles. However long-term stress can lead to digestive problems including ulcers, insomnia, fatigue, high blood pressure, nervousness and excessive sweating, heart disease, strokes and even hair loss. Emotional These responses are due to stress affecting the mind and include anxiety, anger, depression, irritability, frustration, over-reaction to everyday problems, memory loss and a lack of concentration for any task. Anxiety is normally shown as a response to loss, failure, danger or a fear of the unknown. Anger is a common response to frustration or social stress and can become a danger to other individuals if not kept in check. Depression is frequently seen as an emotional response to upsetting situations such as the death of a loved one, illness and failure. Psychological Long-term stress can cause psychological problems in some individuals. Symptoms include withdrawal from society, phobias, compulsive behaviors, eating disorders and night terrors.

SYMPTOMS The signs of job stress vary from person to person, depending on the particular situation, how long the individual has been subjected to the stressors, and the intensity of the stress itself. Typical symptoms of job stress can be insomnia, loss of mental concentration, anxiety, stress, absenteeism, depression, substance abuse, extreme anger and frustration, family conflict, physical illness such as heart disease, migraine, headaches and back problems. CAUSES OF WORKPLACE STRESS Job stress may be caused by a complex set of reasons. Some of the most visible causes of workplace stress are:

Job Insecurity Organized workplaces are going through metamorphic changes under intense economic transformations and consequent pressures. Reorganizations, takeovers, mergers, downsizing and other changes have become major stressors for employees, as companies try to live up to the competition to survive. These reformations have put demand on everyone, from a CEO to a mere executive.

High Demand for Performance Unrealistic expectations, especially in the time of corporate reorganizations, which, sometimes, puts unhealthy and unreasonable pressures on the employee, can be a tremendous source of stress and suffering. Increased workload, extremely long work hours and intense pressure to perform at peak levels all the time for the same pay, can actually leave an employees physically and emotionally drained. Excessive travel and too much time away from family also contribute to an employee`s stressors.

Technology The expansion of technologycomputers, pagers, cell phones, fax machines and the Internethas resulted in heightened expectations for productivity, speed and

efficiency, increasing pressure on the individual worker to constantly operate at peak performance levels. Workers working with heavy machinery are under constant stress to remain alert. In this case both the worker and their family members live under constant mental stress. There is also the constant pressure to keep up with technological breakthroughs and improvisations, forcing employees to learn new software all the times.

Workplace Culture Adjusting to the workplace culture, whether in a new company or not, can be intensely stressful. Making oneself adapt to the various aspects of workplace culture such as communication patterns, hierarchy, dress code if any, workspace and most importantly working and behavioral patterns of the boss as well as the co-workers, can be a lesson of life. Maladjustment to workplace cultures may lead to subtle conflicts with colleagues or even with superiors. In many cases office politics or gossips can be major stress inducers.

Personal or Family Problems Employees going through personal or family problems tend to carry their worries and anxieties to the workplace. When one is in a depressed mood, his unfocused attention or lack of motivation affects his ability to carry out job responsibilities. JOB STRESS AND WOMEN Women may suffer from mental and physical harassment at workplaces, apart from the common job stress. Sexual harassment in workplace has been a major source of worry for women, since long. Women may suffer from tremendous stress such as `hostile work environment harassment`, which is defined in legal terms as `offensive or intimidating behavior in the workplace`. This can consist of unwelcome verbal or physical conduct. These can be a constant source of tension for women in job sectors. Also, subtle discriminations at workplaces, family pressure and societal demands add to these stress factors.

HANDLING STRESS IN WORKPLACE

Start Right To combat work stress, it is very important to start the day in a positive manner. Most of you would agree that before reaching your workplace, you are already stressed out, meeting the task of preparing breakfast, sending kids to school and dodging traffic to reach on time. So, the best bet would be to start the day on a positive note. A proper planning, healthy nutrition and a sweet (contagious) smile can go a long way in determining your mood for the day. It would also help you handle situations in the best way possible.

Clear Your Mind Though this might come to you as a surprise, but most employees, even after months and sometimes years of working, are unclear about what is expected of them. The result is mounting workload and escalating stress!! In case you are not aware of what exactly is expected of you or if the parameters keep changing, the best bet would be to have a meeting with the supervisors. Get your profile right and who knows the stress might just roll off your back easily.

Stay Away From Conflict Staying away from conflicts is a good way to allow your mind to concentrate or focus. Interpersonal conflicts take a toll on the physical, mental and psychological being of a person. They can divert the mind, making a person less efficient at the workplace. So, a good idea would be to avoid conflicting situations, conversations and people.

Stay Organized How many times did your mother scold you because you were unorganized? An unorganized person is always in the middle of a mess, with no way out. Remember, the more organized you are, the better you would be able to deal with work pressures. When you have planned every move well in advance, chances are that you would not face any stress later on. Even crisis situations would be easier to deal with, when you are organized.

Be Comfortable Keeping your mind and body at ease is one of the best ways to deal with work pressures. It is very important to segregate your personal life and professional life. Do not put yourself in a claustrophobic mindset unnecessarily, wherein you are loaded with thoughts and fears. The result - you are not able to work or concentrate properly. Piling workload means taking stress. So, be at ease and free your mind from anything that is unwanted or uncalled for, within the office.

Forget Multitasking Did you think that splitting your mind on two or more things at the same time would make you an efficient worker? If yes, then it is definitely the time to think again. Multitasking may sound an all-so-wonderful and time-saving policy, but believe me, you are doing nothing more than going a step ahead in making yourself a nerd. Stop multitasking and you would do your work more efficiently, concentrating at one thing at a time.

Walk at Lunch Are you bored of leading a sedentary lifestyle, with no physical work at all? If yes, then an easy way to deal with this would be to engage yourself in physical activities. By saying that, we do not mean you need to go to the gym or indulge in an hour of workout everyday. It would be extremely beneficial if you do so, but in case its not possible, just take a walk during your lunch break. This would refresh your mind and help you think differently about the problems and tasks at hand, thereby reducing stress.