Dunlap 1 Tracy Dunlap tracy.dunlap@hotmail.

com Professor Art Kanehara Communications 1010-014

Interpersonal Paper Communication is a very tough subject. It is not just about how you speak to the other person, there are body languages involved in the conversation. Even facial expressions! Communication is a two way street in a conversation. Many words can be said, but can be interpreted differently, to the person you are speaking to. In my opinion, communication is very confusing and interesting. There are ways to communicate effectively with others when using the right methods and/or principles. Communication Principles (Page 7) A fundamental axiom of communication is, one cannot not communicate. (Adler-Elmhorst, pg. 7) This statement can be proven true, in my perspective. This pretty much meshes in with the, communication is unavoidable (Adler-Elmhorst, pg. 7,) which I will explain later. Non-verbal actions can send a person a message, such as, nodding yes or no, or even just staring straight through that person. Let me give you an example, one day, a classmate of mine wanted to borrow my notes, in class, since they had missed a day. I didnt say yes or no, I had just stared at them. The problem was, I wasnt really listening to what they had said. I was too focused on writing down some notes, the professor had written up on the board. This person

Dunlap 2 was a bit confused, and then just sat there silently, going back to their work. Once I snapped out of it, I realized I shouldve said something, but held back, realizing it might have been too late. Instances such as these, can perceive you as a jerk, like I was. Learning this, I have realized I needed to pay attention more to what was going on around me. Communication Is Unavoidable (Page 7) Communication is truly unavoidable. Facial expression, posture, gesture, clothing, and a host of other behaviors offer cues about our attitudes. (AdlerElmhorst, pg. 7) A great example of this would be, at a workplace. Such as, back when I was a supervisor at a grocery store, I would have to take calls from other employees who called in sick. Whenever I heard an employee say, they are throwing up, or giving descriptive details, it felt as if they were just coming up with excuses to not come to work. Failing to show up to work can show to others, like me, that they are unreliable. Especially, for those who did a, no call, no show, at work. It is essential to consider the unintentional messages you send. (Adler-Elmhorst, pg. 7) Communication Is Irreversible (Page 8) Like I had mentioned before, conversations can be interpreted differently to the person you are speaking to. The conversation can be misinterpreted, and you may feel like you want to take back what you had said right at that moment. These kinds of incidents can happen to just about anybody. I remember one time, a few years back, my mother had asked me what I had thought about her orange Capris that she had just gone out and bought, and wanted me to give my honest opinion. Thats how my family was; we were always honest to each other. Unfortunately,

Dunlap 3 before I had given myself time to think, I had told her that her butt looked big. I still remember her face fall down into a frown, and glaring at me. She was so mad. I knew right then, that I had hurt her feelings. I knew I shouldve apologized, but then she had walked out of the room. I still had never got the chance to apologize. These types of situations can happen unfortunately. It truly sucks. Ive learned that you have to think before you speak, and to be careful choosing your words around certain people. Communication Is A Process (Pages 8-9) Every communication event needs to be examined as part of its communication context. (Adler-Elmhorst, pgs. 8-9) When someone asks you a difficult question, your mind can automatically think of other questions to respond back, before giving a final answer. Your answer will depend on a few factors. For example, why are you doing this? What is the outcome from this situation? Will I be happy from this outcome? And, more questions that start normally, with a w- or hword. Each message is part of a process: It doesnt occur in isolation. (AdlerElmhorst, pg. 9) I believe if we ask the questions before giving a final answer, we can understand the, big picture, and see it more clearly. Communication Is Not A Panacea (Page 9) Misunderstandings and ill feelings can arise even when people communicate carefully. (Adler-Elmhorst, pg. 9) This portion rings true. Communication between two people can be misconstrued even in the slightest possible way, without even realizing it. It can be dangerous. Especially when these two people understand one another but disagree on what each other are saying. This brings me to this one event

Dunlap 4 where I had an argument with my dad about genetics. I was telling him that this mental disorder called, schizophrenia, is not genetic. He flat out believed that this mental disorder was genetic, and only genetic. I understood where he was coming from, but I completely disagreed from his point of view. I believed the person had to live through a traumatic event to trigger the mental disorder. Anyways, it was this whole big mess of an argument. He was angry that I just couldnt agree with him. In these situations, its unavoidable. It is normal for both parties to understand each other and not come to the same terms of agreement. Ive learned to accept that though. In Conclusion After going through all of these principles, I have come down to this realization. Communicating is difficult. It is never as easy as it may look in reality. You know how they say that, practice makes perfect. I believe that concept can be used in communications. I believe if we all practice enough, we can communicate with each other much more effectively, even if it may not solve all problems.