May 2014 PFLAG Buffalo Niagara

Buffalo / Niagara
PO Box 617
Buffalo, NY 14207

716-883-0384

info@pflagbuffalo.org
www.pflagbuffalo.org
www.facebook.com/pflag.niagara

We meet because we
have learned that
someone very close to
us is Gay, Lesbian,
Bisexual, or
Transgendered.

We try to help one
another deal with this
information in a
positive manner.

Although we do not
agree at all times, we
try to be
understanding.

We offer help to those
who seek it, but do not
force ourselves on
others.

We strive to maintain
anonymity while
sharing on a level that
is comfortable for all of
us.

We encourage all to
attend meetings for
their own benefit as
well as that of the
group.

It is our hope that when
each of us reaches a
point of understanding
and acceptance, we
realize that this is when
others need us the
most.
Monthly Meeting Schedule

Annual Membership Meeting
Voting on new board members will precede monthly
sharing meeting.

Sunday, May 18, 2014
2:30-4:30
Kenilworth United Church of Christ
45 Dalton Drive
Tonawanda, New York 14223




Please join us as we welcome families and friends to share their personal
stories with us. As always, newcomers will be offered the alternative of
meeting privately with a PFLAG parent.

Kenilworth United Church of Christ is located two blocks west of Niagara
Falls Boulevard at the corner of Decatur Rd and Dalton Dr. Decatur runs
off of Niagara Falls Boulevard about 0.8 miles south of Sheridan Drive and
about 0.8 miles north of Kenmore Ave.

Our monthly meetings are in the library, which is near the parking lot
entrance. The facility is handicap accessible.

New Parents Meetings are scheduled as needed at a location convenient to
those involved. These self-help one-on-one meetings deal with the concerns of
parents and family members who have recently learned that a loved one is
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or Transgender.


May 2014 Page 2



PFLAG members and board members at
The Buffalo Brunch


One of the people upon whose
shoulders PFLAG stands, Mary Hewitt,
with Board member Amy Fularz



President Kristian Rickard speaks after
being introduced by Lynne Tranchell.






A DAY TO ENJOY AND REMEMBER WITH PRIDE

The Buffalo Brunch, an annual event sponsored and presented by
embraceWNY was held on a sunny April 27 at Salvatores Italian
Gardens. At the 18
th
annual brunch, embraceWNY honored
PFLAG Buffalo Niagara with its community organization award.
Bryan Ball, son of PFLAG board member Lisbeth Ball, was
honored for his individual achievements; Tim Moran received an
individual achievement award as well.

This spring event honors those in the community who have made
a difference and affected change. The previous years honorees
gather in the fall to select the spring recipients. That was when
Lynne Tranchell nominated PFLAG. Lynne was there to introduce
President Kristian Rickard. Kristian spoke about PFLAG past,
present and future, as well as the hope that one day PFLAG will
not be needed.

Mary Hewitt, a member since the 1980s shared in the day, as
well as John and Diane Covert who have been involved with
PFLAG for 15 years. Current board members and spouses were
also in attendance; the PFLAG table encompassed the past,
present, and future as our organization reaches back over 30
years. All who have helped to bring PFLAG to this community and
those who have kept it going strong are a part of this award. On
this day those in attendance enjoyed the brunch, smiles, and
speeches, but we thank all members and supporters over the
years for keeping PFLAG strong. We thank embraceWNY for
recognizing the important work we have done over the years.


May 2014 Page 3




PFLAG members pass out information and beads at GSA Conference.

LOCAL GSA CONFERENCE BOLSTERS OUR CULTURAL EVOLUTION
By Lyndsey DArcangelo, reprinted with permission from IN THE LOOP magazine with permission of MyBuffaloPride
As I stood in the middle of the cafeteria at Lancaster High School on the evening of March 26, I
was overcome with a sense of joy I cant quite describe. More than 200 colorful students from
26 different schools across Western New York were gathered together for the 2014 Gay
Straight Alliance Conference. They were mingling with each other, laughing, and taking pictures
on their cell phones during the dinner break. It was a sight to behold.
For most of the kids, if not all, it was a chance to eat pizza, have fun and socialize between
informational sessions largely organized by Gay and Lesbian Youth Services of Western New
York. For the adults present, it was a chance for us to ponder what would have been had we
had the same opportunity when we were in high school, and to acknowledge just how far we
have come as a society in general.
The now annual GSA Conference was first held in 2009 at Kenmore West High School. Ten
schools from two counties participated and roughly 65 kids were in attendance. Thanks to the
hard work and dedication of Marvin L. Henchbarger, GLYS executive director, participation has
grown immensely. This year, more than 25 schools from four counties participated, and more
than 200 kids were in attendance.
Every year, I try to attend the conference in some fashion. Sometimes I teach a workshop,
other times I facilitate discussions. Ive also been on a career panel in the past and GLYS has
raffled off my books as prizes for the kids. Quite honestly, its my favorite event of the year.
And no matter how many times I see it, I still get goose bumps when those kids gather in the
cafeteria for pizza.
Maybe its because Im old enough to understand what older generations had to endure as they
grew up. I appreciate what they went through and what simple liberties they were deprived of
such as having pizza in a high school cafeteria with other openly gay students.
I am also well aware of the support I lacked when I was in high school. There was no such
thing as GSA. In fact, I used to think I was the only gay person in all of Buffalo.


May 2014 Page 4



Its hard not to marvel at how much has changed since then. Sure, these kids might not fully
understand how lucky they are. They might even take it for granted. But the fact that they
actually have an opportunity like this to take for granted is what is most important.
I feel, in some strange way, that this is part of my generations legacy. And I hope that older
generations look at marriage equality and families with gay parents as their legacy. We cant
evolve and move forward on the path unless others help pave the way for us.
As I sat down to eat my pizza, a young girl approached me. Smiling widely, she said, See that
girl over there whos walking away. She says hey. I laughed. Oh, well tell her I said hey. The
girl giggled and took off after her friend.
Whether they knew I was an adult advisor or not, I dont know. I have a baby face, and I still
get carded almost everywhere I go. It was innocent and cute. Needless to say, my inner
adolescent beamed with pride.
MARRIAGE EQUALITY MAKES FAMILIES HEALTHIER
By Kevin OKeeffe; www.theadvocate.com
Marriage equality isn't just good for the soul it's also good for your health.
According to a new article in The New England Journal of Medicine, marriage equality is "a
prescription for better health" for families. Citing several studies, the article attributes access to
a spouse's health care as the primary reason.
"Public health research has suggested not only that discriminatory environments and bans on
same-sex marriage are detrimental to health but also that legalizing same-sex marriage
(among other policies expanding protections) contributes to better health for LGBT people," the
article reads.
The Institute of Medicine's 2011 report about LGBT health indicated that LGBT people suffer
greater "physical and mental health outcomes" than their heterosexual and cisgender
counterparts, primarily because of being a part of "a stigmatized minority group." Because of
this, access to health care is all the more imperative.
"LGBT people living in states that ban same-sex marriage, for instance," the Journal article
reads, "are more likely than their counterparts in other states to report symptoms of
depression, anxiety, and alcohol use disorder. In an essay published on The Daily Beast about
the article, Russell Saunders, a pediatrician, cites his own experience as an example of
marriage improving both physical and spiritual health.
"I can talk about my family using the same terms and expecting the same respect as anyone
else," Saunders says. "There has been a perceptible improvement in my own wellbeing since
the state where we live granted us the right to marry."
The Journal article is yet another strong point in favor of marriage equality, which Saunders
calls "the right policy from numerous vantage points."
As he summarizes, "It makes America a more equitable and just place to live."

May 2014 Page 5



PFLAG NATIONAL HOLDS STRAIGHT FOR EQUALITY AWARDS
Windy City Times
PFLAG National last night held its sixth annual Straight for Equality Awards Gala at the New
York Marriott Marquis. Straight for Equalitya nationwide outreach and education project
created by PFLAG Nationaleducates, engages, and empowers allies to advocate for and
support people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer.
This year's honors went to Ally Sheedy ( Pysch;High Art ), American Jewish World Service
president Ruth Messinger, and the Johnson & Johnson Family of Companies.
Writer/producer/comedian Lizz Winstead ( Co-Creator, The Daily Show ) once again hosted
the evening, and was joined on stage by auctioneer Sara Friedlander of Christie's New York,
who was recently named by ARTINFO as one of the "30-and-Under Crowd: The Art World's
Most Influential Young Figures."
Others appearing on stage included former New York City mayor David Dinkins, MSNBC's
Thomas Roberts, and Sophie DiCampalto, a transgender woman who shared her story of how
PFLAG National's Straight for Equality project helped her through her transition, in the
workplace.
"I'm here to put yet another face to the brilliant, life-saving work that PFLAG National does
through its Straight for Equality project," said DiCampalto. "My agency's staff was informed
of my transition just prior to PFLAG's Jean-Marie Navetta appearing before them to help them
understand what was going on, and to expertly answer their many questions."
Navetta, PFLAG National's Director of Equality & Diversity Partnerships, advised DiCampalto's
company on trans-inclusive policies and procedures, and presented a training to employees.
DiCampalto, describing herself as "reclusive and hidden for years," found herself, "suddenly
appreciating and accepting all the love and support that was being showered upon me by my
co-workers." Said DiCampalto, "I owe so much of my amazing newfound life to PFLAG
National and its Straight for Equality project."
Johnson & Johnson Family of Companies, honored for progressive policies on LGBTQ diversity
and inclusionas well as strategic marketing campaigns such as Care With Pridewas
represented on stage by CEO Alex Gorsky, who spoke movingly of the company's
commitment to equality, which aligns so closely with PFLAG's.
Said Gorsky, "PFLAG has been at the forefront of fighting for equality and inclusion, values
we believe in deeply at Johnson & Johnson."
Sheedya longtime advocate on behalf of homeless LGBTQ youth through her work with the
Ali Forney Centerspoke not only of her advocacy work, but of her personal connection to
the cause of LGBTQ equality.

May 2014 Page 6



Said Sheedy, "As the mother of a queer kid, whom I love more than anything in this world, I
thank you for this incredible honor."
Honoree Ruth Messinger spoke about the need to make a vocal difference. "It's not what you
stand for," said Messinger, "but what you stand up for that counts."
In addition to the awards, the gala included a particularly moving dance performance by
young students from Harlem School of the Arts, which was choreographed by longtime
teacher/choreographer Ronald K. Alexander, and performed to "Heaven & Earth" by
GrammyTM Award-nominated artists Neshama Carlebach and the Green Pastures Gospel
Choir.
A lively auction helmed by the talented Friedlander featured items from LA Live, Marriott,
American Airlines, and last year's Straight for Equality in the Workplace honoree Whirlpool.
As the honors went on inside the beautiful New York Marriott Marquis Broadway Ballroom,
outside, PFLAG National's message of love, family, diversity, and inclusion was shared with
thousands of people in the heart of New York City: Times Square.
Thanks to Thomson-Reuters Corporation, two 30-second spotsone for PFLAG and one for
the Straight for Equality projectplayed in rotation, often more than three times per hour,
from noon through midnight on the JumboTron screens. PFLAG National Executive Director
Jody Huckaby shared from the stage PFLAG's thanks to Thomson-Reuters, as well as a video
feed of both spots as they looked to onlookers outside.
Straight for Equality is a project of PFLAG National. It was launched in 2007 to invite,
educate, and engage allies to have the discussions necessary to move equality forward for
their gay, lesbian, bi, transgender, and queer friends in simple, nonpolitical ways.
PFLAG Buffalo Niagara board member Amy Fularz attended this event.
MEN, WOMEN, AND HIJRAS, INDIAS THIRD GENDER
By Francesca Trianni; www.time.com
Transgender people in India have always had to define themselves on government forms as
either a male or female. But that is about to change.
In a landmark ruling, Indias Supreme Court has recognized a third gender option to be created
for transgender people, or Hijras, as they are often referred to in South Asia.
The spirit of the [Indian] Constitution is to provide equal opportunity to every citizen to grow
and attain their potential, irrespective of caste, religion or gender, the court said in its order,
which is expected to alleviate the conditions of transgender people in India, through access to
welfare programs, employment opportunities and education.

May 2014 Page 7


Indias Election Commission allowed a third gender of other on voter registration forms for
this years election.
Nearly 30,000 people designated themselves as other and there are an estimated 2 million
transgender individuals in India, the Associated Press reported.
India is not the first country to recognize a third gender, as Nepal and Bangladesh have also
passed similar legislation.

DEBBY BOONE OPENS UP ABOUT HOW SHE HAS RECONCILED HER CHRISTIAN
BELIEFS WITH HER CHRISTIAN FAITH
By Greg Hernandez
I am one of the people that has made the transition from an old way of thinking to a new
one. Three-time Grammy winner Debby Boone may be from one of the most famous Christian
families in the US but she has become staunchly pro gay.
Boone, whose father is anti-gay singer and actor Pat Boone, attended the GLAAD Media Awards
in Los Angeles on Saturday with lesbian friends and talked about her journey to becoming a
Christian who embraces the LGBT community.
'I'm really happy to be here in support of GLAAD, because I am one of the people that has
made the transition from an old way of thinking to a new one,' she said in a red carpet
interview with Traipsing Thru Films.
Boone, 57, had one of the biggest pop hits of the 1970s with You Light Up My Life which spent
10 weeks as number one on the Billboard charts.
'It's getting to know people,' Boone said of her enlightenment. 'A lot of the gay and lesbian
people who I have come to know really well. I just can't continue to reconcile what I believed
with what I know now. It has really shifted the way I grew up thinking.'
Boone admits 'it was a tough transition. And it is for a lot of people so I think I have
compassion for both sides,' she says. 'It's not about good and bad people. It's just about
continuing to tell the truth and the truth will do the work.'
Boone is married to Gabriel Ferrer whose parents are the late singer Rosemary Clooney and the
late actor Miguel Ferrer. She attended the GLAAD ceremony with a lesbian couple who attended
the church where her husband was associate rector.
Call for Board Members

PFLAG Buffalo Niagara is seeking new members for our Board of Directors.
If you are passionate about issues impacting the parents, family and friends of the LGBTQ community. concerned
with the well-being of LGBTQ youth, and have the desire to work with driven and creative individuals with similar
passions, kindly consider applying for Board membership. Board members will need to be available on the third
Sunday at 1:00 for monthly meetings. Please feel free to contact us via email: info@pflagbuffalo.org, or send us a
private message via Facebook: facebook.com/pflag.niagara.
Buffalo Gay Mens Chor
ALL YOU CAN EAT SPAGHETTI DINSunday, April 6, 2014

3pm - 9pm seating
$10
Boomerangs Bar & Grill
995 Niagara Street; Buffalo NY 14213

Tickets & info: 883-1277
www.buffalogaymenschorus.com


May 2014 Page 8











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