The Little Red Pen Readers Theater

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LITTLE RED PEN (LRP)
STAPLER
SCISSORS
PENCIL
ERASER
HIGHLIGHTER
PUSHPIN
TANK (HAMSTER)
PAPER CLIP BOX
RULER
YARDSTICK
SHARPENER
NARRATOR 1
NARRATOR 2
CHORUS/AUDIENCE
LITTLE RED PEN (LRP): Lets get to work!
NARRATOR 1: The Little Red Pen whirled about, checking, circling, and marking out.
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: SCRITCH SCRATCH SCRITCH
PENCIL: Oh, no--shes at it again.
STAPLER: Dont moe.
SCISSORS: !h-h-h-h-h!
ERASER: "m #OT hel$ing an%more.
HIGHLIGHTER: &eah, too risk%.
PUSHPIN: '!ilencio!
LRP: Theres too much to do! (here are m% hel$ers) !ta$ler, !cissors, Pencil,
*raser, Push$in, +ighlighter! ,re %ou hiding in the drawer) -et u$ here #O(!
". the $a$ers arent graded, the students wont learn.
The school might close. The walls might tumble.
The .loors might crumble. The sk% might .all.
"t might be the end o. the world! (ho will hel$ me sae the world)
STAPLER: #ot "!
SCISSORS: #ot "!
PENCIL: #ot "!
ERASER: (hat)
HIGHLIGHTER: #ot "!
PUSHPIN: '&o no!
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LRP: (+& #OT))
STAPLER: /% back is killing me! *er%bod% kee$s $ounding on it. " could break!
PENCIL: " write all da% and what do " get) !har$ened down to a nub. (ho needs a
nub)
PUSHPIN: Dont call me Push$in. /% name is !e0orita 1hincheta. ,nd " am la 2ltima
chincheta. ". " get lost3no more chinchetas. 41om$rende)
SCISSORS: "e been cutting u$ all da%. "5m getting dull. #ot good .or a shar$ gu% like
me!
ERASER: (hat was the 6uestion) " .orget eer%thing. /% head is shrinking.
HIGHLIGHTER: "m bright, not cra7%! Remember /r. 8elt Ti$ /arker) +is ca$ was
le.t o.. and %ou know where he ended u$.
STAPLER, SCISSORS, PENCIL, ERASER, HIGHLIGHTER, PUSHPIN: The Pit o. #o
Return! THE TRASH
LRP: Rubbish! &ou cant s$end %our li.e hiding, worr%ing about The Pit. Theres work
to be done and " need hel$!

SCISSORS: (ell, 9ig 9oss% 9all$oint, wh% dont %ou ask Tank) +ed be a +:-*
hel$.
TANK: SNORT SNORT Z-Z-Z-Z-Z
LRP: Tank) That la7% hamster) #eer! The $a$ers must be graded. "ll +,;* to do it
m%sel.!
NARRATOR 2: ,nd so she did. (ell, she tried.
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: SCRITCH SCRATCH SCRITCH
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NARRATOR: The Little Red Pen worked long into the night. "n the wee hours o. the
morning she could barel% moe across the $age. !he wibbled. !he wobbled.
Then she .ell oer, e<hausted. Little Red Pen began to r-r-r-r-r-r-o-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l right to
the edge o. the desk.
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: CLUNK
STAPLER: (hats was T+,T)
PENCIL: The sk% is .alling! "ts the end o. the world!

HIGHLIGHTER: #o, its #OT. "ts $robabl% Tank, moing around in his cage!
NARRATOR 2 : !cissors rolled his e%es.
SCISSORS: #o wa%! 9ig 9o% neer moes.
PENCIL: "t "! the end! " heard Pen sa% it. (hat are we going to do)

SCISSORS: (ere going u$, so get the lead out, !tubb%!
ERASER: &eah, lets go . . . go . . . where are we going) " .orgot.
PUSHPIN: TO T+* D*!=TOP! ';>monos! ,rriba, arriba!
PUSHPIN: ',%, caramba! /uchos $a$ers!
PENCIL: Pens -O#*! ,nd the $a$ers arent .inished! The students wont learn! "ts
the end o. the world!
STAPLER: "t is #OT the end o. the world.

HIGHLIGHTER: +ow do we know .or sure) The $a$ers hae ,L(,&! been graded.
(ho knows (+,T will ha$$en i. the%re #OT)
ERASER: " know.
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STAPLER, SCISSORS, PENCIL, HIGHLIGHTER, PUSHPIN: (+,T)
ERASER: " .orgot.
NARRATOR 1: !cissors shook his head.
SCISSORS: The end o. the world could be worse than The Pit. The $a$ers must be
graded. (ell +,;* to do it ourseles!
NARRATOR 2: ,nd so the% did. (ell, the% tried.
NARRATOR 1: !cissors grabbed a $a$er.
SCISSORS: #o ca$ital letter!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: 1L"P
SCISSORS: Dot that i!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: !#"P
STAPLER: #ot like that! &ou cut it to shreds! Let me do it! *raser, ho$ on. " see a
miss$elled word!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: BAM
STAPLER: This sentence needs a erb!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: BAM
STAPLER: This whole $aragra$h is wrong!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM
HIGHLIGHTER: #ot like that! Too man% sta$les! Let me do it!
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CHORUS/AUDIENCE: !?:*,= !?:*,= SQUE-E-E-E-EAK
ERASER: #ot like that! Too bright! Let me do it!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: RUBBITY RUB SMUDGITY SMUDGE
SCISSORS: #ot like that, #umbskull. &ou erased eer%thing! *en the students
name! (hose $a$er is this)
ERASER: " .orgot.
HIGHLIGHTER: This is terrible!
SCISSORS: , catastro$he!
PUSHPIN: '?ue desastre!
ERASER: ,w.ul.
STAPLER: (hat now)
PENCIL: "ts the end o. the world!
HIGHLIGHTER: HO ILL HELP US SA!E THE ORLD"
LRP (SO#TLY): " ("LL!
NARRATOR 2: The% rushed to the edge o. the desk.
ERASER: Oh, no, Pen is in the . . . the . . .
PUSHPIN: *l $o7o de no returno!
PENCIL: Pencil broke down. (hat are we going to do) (e need her. ". the $a$ers
arent graded, the students wont learn. Then the% . . .
STAPLER: Oh, sto$ it, alread%..
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SCISSORS: " hate to be blunt, but shes a goner. #o one comes back .rom The Pit.
HIGHLIGHTER: #ot so .ast. " hae a bright idea. Pa$er 1li$ 9o<! (here are %ou)
-ie me %our cli$s.
PAPER CLIP BOX: 1ant hae 5em, 9o< scowled. (ithout m% cli$s "m em$t%.
:seless. "ll end u$ in the--
HIGHLIGHTER: O:T ("T+ T+* 1L"P!! (e need a chain!
NARRATOR 1: One b% one the $a$er cli$s marched out and hooked together.
ERASER: " know what to do!
NARRATOR 2: *raser grabbed the chain and raced across the deskto$. Then he
.orgot to sto$, bounced o.. the edge, and . . .
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: CLUNK
ERASER: +e%, eer%bod%! -uess whos down here in The Pit) The Little Red . . .
uh . . . whats her .ace!
SCISSORS: (e =#O(, Rubbernoggin, now %oure 9OT+ in The Pit.

HIGHLIGHTER: " hae another bright idea. *raser, grab The Little Red Pen. (e@ll
$ull %ou u$. Read%, eer%bod%)
SCISSORS: !hes $ushing!
PUSHPIN: (ell, "m a P:!+$in!
PENCIL: (e hae to P:LL, not P:!+!
STAPLER: +ow about " $ush %ou all in T+* P"T!
HIGHLIGHTER: *nough! Lets $ull! A-B-C
STAPLER, SCISSORS, PENCIL, HIGHLIGHTER, PUSHPIN : AARRGGHH
SCISSORS: Too hea%. ,n% more bright ideas)
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TANK: SNORT SNORT Z-Z-Z-Z-Z
HIGHLIGHTER: &es! The hamster wheel! (ell hook the chain to the wheel! Then
Tank will run, the wheel will turn, the chain will. . .
SCISSORS: (hoa Tank% 9o% hasnt been on the wheel in %ears. 9esides3how are
we going to get .rom +*R* to T+*R*)
HIGHLIGHTER: Ruler can be our bridge!
RULER: (hat) /e) , bridge) "m not budging an inch.
HIGHLIGHTER: /O;* "T!
RULER: Oh, all right.
NARRATOR 1: Ruler stretched out. 8arther . . . .arther . . . one more inch . . . hal. an
inch . . .
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: CLUNK
SCISSORS: Oh, great. Three in The Pit.
YARDSTICK: #eed some hel$)
PENCIL: &ardstick! " thought %ou were broken and down in the3
YARDSTICK: The Pit) #obod% throws /* in The Pit. " ma% be shorter now, but "m tall
enough to hold u$ this $lant and long enough to be %our bridge.
NARRATOR 2: &ardstick stretched out. 8arther . . . .arther . . . one more inch . . . hal.
an inch . . . he made it!

NARRATOR 1: *er%one dashed across.
PENCIL: "-"3"m a.raid.
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STAPLER: ,w, come on, Pencil, %ou can do it! Dont look down!
NARRATOR 2: !har$ener $eeked out .rom under a $ile o. $a$ers.
SHARPENER: "ll hel$ %ou.
PENCIL: ,+-+-+-+-+-+!!!!!
NARRATOR 1: Pencil took one look at !har$ener and bolted across.
NARRATOR 2: The% o$ened the cage door and cre$t inside.
TANK: SNORT SNORT Z-Z-Z-Z-Z
NARRATOR 1: +ighlighter hooked the $a$er cli$ chain to the wheel.
HIGHLIGHTER: O=3grab Tank. (ere hauling him oer.
PUSHPIN: +amster grande. '/:& grande!
NARRATOR 2: The% hu..ed and the% $u..ed until .inall%, the% $ulled Tank onto the
wheel.
NARRATOR 1: +ighlighter took a dee$ breath.
HIGHLIGHTER: (ake u$, Tank! R:#!
TANK: SNORT Z-Z-Z-Z-Z
NARRATOR 2: 1hincheta smiled.
PUSHPIN: " can wake him u$. . .
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: POKE
TANK: ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR$
PENCIL: T,#=D"LL,! "ts the end o. the world!
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SCISSORS: R:#!
HIGHLIGHTER: +*! ,8T*R :!!
SCISSORS:"/ R:##"#- "# 1"R1L*!!
PENCIL: (heres Tank)
STAPLER: (ho knows) Eust kee$ going!
PENCIL: +e%, the wheel is turning!
CHORUS/AUDIENCE: CREAK
NARRATOR 1: ,round and around.
NARRATOR 2: 8aster and .aster.
NARRATOR 1: The wheel turned.
NARRATOR 2: The chain moed.
NARRATOR 1: :P. :P. :P.
NARRATOR 2: :$ came Ruler. :$ came *raser. :$ came The Little Red Pen. :$
came long lost M%& #'() T*+ M,%-'%$
HIGHLIGHTER: "t worked! ,nd we did it3all b% ourseles!
PUSHPIN: '9rao!
PENCIL: Did we sae the world)
NARRATOR 1: The Little Red Pen beamed.
LRP: &ou saed :!, but now . . .
ERASER: #O(, (* hae a Fob to .inish!
LRP, STAPLER, SCISSORS, PENCIL, HIGHLIGHTER, PUSHPIN: &O: D"D#T
8OR-*T! Lets get to work!
NARRATOR 2: ,nd so the% did.
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NARRATOR 1: The% checked and sta$led, organi7ed and al$habeti7ed, $iled and .iled
without another thought o. running low, becoming dull, dr%ing u$, getting lost, breaking
down, or landing in The Pit . . . until the Fob was done.
NARRATOR 2: The world was sa.e.
NARRATOR 1: ,nd no one hid in the drawer eer again.
NARRATOR 2: *<ce$t %ou know who . . .
TANK: SNORT Z-Z-Z-Z-Z