Hiddleston begins, They say Brits play the best villains, but what makes a great villain?

:
Firstly, you need to sound distinct. To speak with an eloquence that lets everyone know whos
in charge. A villain should have style. A suit should always be bespoke, razor-sharp like your wit. Its important
that a villain has the means to stay one step ahead. World domination starts with an attention to detail. Take this
tiny switch for example, it changes everything.
Now brace yourselves, Hiddleston continues the Richard II, Act 2, Scene 1 speech, that was cut short in the
opening scene:
This happy breed of men, this little world,
This precious stone set in the silver sea,
Against the envy of less happier lands,
This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.
Its all mine!

Well be hearing a special anouncement, for my dear friend Jonathan. My dear boy, I have made
a terible mistake. I was trying to keep my baby to myself. Because I knew I would always protect
her. But I realize now, children need to discover things for themselves. Theyll stumble and fall,
laugh and cry, butsuch is life.The truth is, you and Mavis are meant to be. You zing! If she must
give her trust to someone else, Im thankful that it is you Jonathan. I hope you can hear me, and
forgive me. Honey, I always thought the worst thing ever would be seeing you go. But the worst
is seeing you unhappy. Baby, I want you to live your life. I dont know how am i supposed to do
that.-You know mamy already gave you her brithday present, can I now give you mine? Do you
really mean it dad-Go make your own paradise. Can we try that kiss over again-I think we can.
I do not fear death.
Sons of Gondor! Of Rohan! My brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the
heart of me! A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends
and break all bonds of fellowship. But it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered
shields when the age of Men comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight!
By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you stand! Men of the West!
For Frodo.
My friends... you bow to no one.


Oh: I'm a virgin by choice.
Zed: Ha! Not *your* choice!


Speech is the most powerful weapon and the silence of wisdom
Tongue is sharper than blades and words make the deepest wound that never heal.
Speeches are weapons for the politcians, but on batlefelds, speeches do not pierce shells !
My tongue is sharper than your blade!
but when diplomacy fails the sword is mighter than the pen.
Speech is golden and can cause natons to be moved by it but silence is also silver .
Sof speech makes a sharp sword redundant.
" In tmes of peace prepare your speech , in tme of war prepare your sword " .
YOUR WORDS, MY FRIEND, NEED THE BACKING OF MY SWORD"
Aye, but a sword makes them bow.
Take care with your words for my sword cares not.
Beneath the rule of men entrely great
The pen is mighter than the sword. Behold
The arch-enchanters wand! itself is nothing!
But taking sorcery from the master-hand and to strike.
The loud earth breathless! Take away the sword and you're city can't be saved without it!
Speech is the most powerful weapon! Diplomacy is even greater.
Speech is the most powerful weapon! So let them hear the speech of our blades and footsteps!
When talking stops the sword is drawn.
When talking stops, either the sword is drawn or the enemy has already died of boredom!
Diplomacy plays no part in war but might avoid one.
speech may be powerful but spartan steel delivers the deepest cut
the language is like 1000 small needle. but a Spartan not sew, he goes to war. thus the most powerful
weapon is the silent and kill from the background. Sewing is a hobby for washerwoman same as the
lady on the river in game. the real war needs no words - just a sea of dead Spartans is a real fght.
Weapons may topple an impending army, but words can cripple natons.
...but only if they are also mastered, so that they can be a weapon!
The sword is migther than the pen, except at the distance of between 1-10 feet. At longer and shorter
ranges the pen is more dangerous. Even half swording is does not give much advantage against a
short stabbing weapon like the pen. Speech doesnt really have that point so it is inferior to the pen.
And the range of your voice isnt that great either. So a lakoonian would challenge you to prove your
incorrect statement.
I carve my speeches with my sword SPARTA


Once Upon a Time
By James A. Tucker
10MAR
Philip, I want to tell you a story and like all good stories it
starts like thisOnce upon a time, there was a FATHER and in case you cant figure
that out, thats me. This FATHER had a wonderful little boy. He was very happy. Then
one day he found out his wife was going to have another baby. So he prayed, Lord if its
Your willmake her a little girl. And He did.
Click here to watch the video.
I was the first person to hold her in my arms. And I looked at her and said, Lord make
her like her mother. And He did. She was loving and giving and so good and so kind.
But then I realized I was getting left out. So I said, Lord make her like me. And He did.
She could drive a truck and a tractor. She could load hay and chew tobacco. Do you
realize what youre getting? But at the same time she was opinionated, emotional and
hard-headed.
So I said, Lord thats enough of that! MAKE HER LIKE YOU! And He did.
He gave her the desire to serve people. She loves people. She gave her life to being a
nurse. Shes brought people back from the dead. And shes held the hand of people who
have breathed their last breath. He gave her a heart for mission and shes trekked all
over the world: pushing canoes up swollen rivers, laid on the floor as bullets whizzed
outside so she could tell people about Jesus.
But still something was missing. So I said, Lord, make her happy. AND SHE MET
YOU. You see that look on her face? I never saw that, until she met you. And Im
grateful for that.
Today Im giving you the best thing I have to give. And I just wanted you to know before I
did that how hard me and God has worked to get her ready. So Philip, as I give her to
you, I dont think youll mind if I give you one more word of adviceMe and God have
worked hard. Dont screw it up!


No one calls us names except for us. This fight is gonna make us legends. Run! Oh, sorry,
did I just step on your foot, or was that your breast? Go away, I got a bat. It's Elizabeth,
your neighbor. I brought you soup. That's why I have the bat. Ronnie, I know you're
down in the dumps, but as a fellow bachelor, I know you're gonna bounce back, because
you may not be smart and, uh, you may not be good-looking, but you got one thing that
every woman loves. You have an enormous beach house."
You know why Ronnie died in his bed? Because for two years he never got out of that
damn bed. I got a beautiful, young girlfriend here, who guys half my age are drooling
over. I'd marry her before I'd give up like Ronnie. I said it, babe. You want to get
hitched? Ronnie, I'll see you in 30 years, pal. Your daughter got this engagement party
together pretty fast, huh? Yeah, she probably didn't want to waste a lot of time,
considering.
- She's almost 32. - I have a hemorrhoid that's almost 32. You've got your whole what's
left of your life ahead of you. I mean, you know. Look at Archie. He's divorced and
miserable I've been married almost 40 years, and I wish I was as miserable as Archie.
Can you guys maybe give me a little support as my dearest friends? I proposed at the
funeral. - I got nothing. Arch? - Nada.
Okay, or now, if you want to open it now. "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas"? A
condom and a Viagra? - Where did you get a condom? - That's your reaction? I'm at the
pharmacy 30 times a day, I can get a condom Sweetheart, you're unhappy. It's like the
light has gone out of your eyes. And the Florida jokes, they're... They're getting tired.
And I... I want my guy back. Heh, so I... I thought, if... If you... I don't want to know
what you do. Don't tell me about it, and we will never bring it up again. You...? Is this
some kind of trick? What...? - I'm afraid to get out of the car. - Get out of the car. - Are
you...? - Get out of the car. Okay, love you. Love you.
What the hell are you doing in Brooklyn? I heard there was a bathrobe convention. -
Have I come to the right spot? - Don't be a smart-ass. All the flights of stairs in his
condition. - Archie's here? Why on earth would I ever want to go to Vegas? For fun!
Remember fun? That thing you used to have before the permanent scowl set in? Come
on, I don't have a permanent scowl. - He said with a scowl. - I don't! Okay, it's not a
scowl, you're just ugly. If you think I'm leaving this apartment, you're dumber than that
hat. Say what you want to me, but leave my hat out of this, okay? My hat has never
done a thing to you. What, are you...? Are you nuts? You're gonna give yourself another
stroke! Archie, you okay? You got to come. You got to come to Vegas with us. - Please,
Paddy. - Okay. Okay. - Prick. - Asshole. That was well done.
- I'm going home. - How many times do I got to tell you I'm sorry? You can't say it
enough, my friend. You can't say it enough. Every time I see you, we go through this
shit. One more word, I'm gonna knock your block off like I did in fifth grade. All right, all
right, all right. Hey, hey, hey! Knock this shit off! The hell's the matter with you? Now
we're here together, the four of us. We're here to celebrate Billy marrying an infant. I
need this. Sam needs this. And believe it or not, you two jerk-offs need it most of all.
Now, either you'll manage to be civil with each other, or so help me, I'm gonna rain holy
hell down on both of you. Billy, now that you've got ass-hair on your head, do you wash
your hair, or do you just wipe?
And where'd you get that silly hat? Oh, why is my hat the default insult? Can thrill me
like you do? My one and only You< All right. All right. Terrific. Thank you! But all that
tells me is that wherever you guys are from, you lack quality entertainment. Okay, that'll
do it for me. Make sure to tip your waitresses. It's pretty funny when they fall over. No,
she's good, she's good. My friends and I, uh, would like to buy you a drink. Um, you
were the ones laughing. In that case, I should buy you a drink. - Ah, heh. - Oh, hardly. -
I'm Diana Boyle. - Hi, I'm Billy Gherson. - Hi. Uh, that's Sam Harris. - Hey, Diana,
please, sit down. - Let go of her hand. - Thank you. Wow. You were... That was just
incredible. And... And I'm just gonna preemptively just put my cards - on the table, and
say that... Ah. - Sam. My wife of 40 years has given me permission to, basically, uh,
cheat on her this next few days. And so I just wanted to let you know, in case, uh, you...
- I'm available. - That's a generous offer. Are you good in bed, Sam I don't remember.
Uh, Carol, could I have a Sapphire Martini, straight up - with a twist, please? Gentlemen?
- All right. Bombay Sapphire martini, straight up. Don't pay any mind to him. - I'm a big
drinker, I drink all the time. - Okay, okay. Bring him two. - And I'll have one. I'll... I'll
have one as well. So, what brings you boys to Vegas? I'll tell you what brings us to
Vegas: a big fat liar. I just wanted to come over and tell you how much I enjoyed - your
performance. - Oh, thank you. You're no spring chicken, but you deserve better - than
being around these lowlifes. - Wow! Prince Charming, is that you? You are so much
shorter than I thought you would be. No, actually we're here, uh, for a wedding. Our
friend Hazelnut is tying the knot on Sunday. - Yeah? Oh. - So, all right. So long, jerk-
offs. I'm gonna go look for a hotel that actually has hotel rooms. Wait, wait. Why are you
leaving? Because of this schmuck, that's why. We got a couple of unresolved issues. Is
he a schmuck? - It's a gray area. - Hmm. We've been best friends since we're 6 years
old. My wife dies about a year ago, he doesn't even show up for the funeral. It's a little
more complicated than that. I... Yeah, sends me flowers with a note that says "Sorry for
your loss." Schmuck. Well, I am sorry that you're leaving Clearly I need someone to look
out for me, seeing as how I'm associating with an alcoholic, an adulterer - and a
schmuck. - Heh, heh. I like you. - Well. - Pat Connors. Still Diana Boyle. - Oh, look here.
- There you are. To the first bachelor party I've ever attended that could be covered by
Medicare. - And, um, to the only people here who actually listened to me sing. Thank you
for that. Hey, you, eye contact. Doesn't mean a thing without eye contact. How old is the
woman that he is marrying? - Uh, she's, uh... - Oh, well, you know, she's... - Uh, just,
uh, in her... - 30-ish. Oh, sweet Jesus. Guys, come on, we got to get going here, all
right? - Let's get over to the Aria. - Oh, that's a great hotel. - Has my lucky big wheel. -
Mm. Big wheel. - Then you're coming with us. - She is? What the hell is with this traffic?
- Are you comfortable? - No, I'm... I'm fine. - I can make him sit in the back. - No, he
doesn't have to go in the back. - All right, huddle up, huddle up. You are surrounded by
slot machines, poker, roulette, and there are girls at every bar. I want to hear stories, I
want to hear results, I want to hear all of you getting in trouble. And I'm sure this young
lady can help you. Yes, we did it. Our lives are changed forever, Paddy. Can you feel it'?
All right, Paddy, you just won five dollars off the buffet. - What are you gonna do first? -
Go to the buffet. He's going to the buffet, ladies and gentlemen, the man is going to the
buffet. Yay!
Heh, she's got you on a short leash, doesn't she? - Kids these days. - Well, would Mrs.
Don Rickles. You're a... You're a trans... Trans... planted New Yorker? You look fantastic.
And I do not judge, I make no judgments. Oh, no, no. No judgment here either. If you're
gonna get hitched in Vegas, this is pretty much the least depressing place you can do it.
Uh, no, no, no, this is not my fianc. This man would never marry someone even close to
his own age. So who are you? I'm his mother. So we got a lounge singer of a certain age.
- Oh, how delicately put. - But not from here. In my former life, I was a tax attorney.
Um, I raised a daughter on my own. Her father was an asshole of epic proportions, and I
got her through school and, um... Now, I am giving you the full bio here. Should I stop
or...? - No, no, no, go on, go on. - Really? And so a few months ago, I found myself
downsized and empty-nested, "What do you really want to do with your life, Diana
Boyle? And what I really wanted to do was sing. <i>I'm a little old for American
Idol.</i> - Oh. - So I figured Vegas. And so, you know, as they say, it goes. A big shot
at mbon's needed some legal advice, so basically, I got that gig sewed up till I drop. It
was nice of you to walk me to my car. Oh, well, it was, um, ice of you to walk me to the
chapel. You know, you are not as charming as you think you are. Well, no one could be,
quite frankly. It was nice. Congratulations! So long, schmuck! I think the Holy Spirit's
about to leave the room. I'm gonna see if I can't stop him, okay? - I shall not want. - I
love you, son. Amen.
Well, check your pulse, fellas, because coming to the stage is our first girl. She's from
Seattle and she likes to get wet, baby! Yeah, look at them assets, baby! Uh, with all due
respect, I believe I'm actually assigned to... - Uh, he canceled. - He canceled? Yeah, give
these gentlemen Villa 4. Are you sure he canceled? I just confirmed with his travel a...
Good day, gentlemen. Nightclub? Dancing? Yes, Mr. Clayton, I believe some people will
be dancing at the nightclub. Usually gets jumping around 11:00. If you like, I can pick
you up or wake you up. - What are we talking about? - That's when we come alive.
Midnight at the disco, we'll see you there. We're always up and about after midnight on
the weekends. - A little after, maybe. - I'll leave you gentlemen to your fun.
Nice weekend? You call this a nice weekend? This is sad. I'd give my left arm to be with
my wife right now, and all Sammy wants to do is cheat on his. And, Archie, you're on
some sort of self-destructive bender, cleaning out your pension fund like you're so
desperate to be alive. And this guy wants us to validate his marrying a child. Well, you
know what? I'm not gonna be part of this charade, not me. Naptime. Uh, we've been
here like an hour, Billy. I think they're only letting people with cleavage in. Screw it,
follow me. Get back in line. You sure about that, son? - Oh, y'all are serious, huh? - There
you go. And one for your warmth and hospitality. - Eighteen hundred. - Eighteen hundred
what? Uh, no, I got this. I'm up $102,000. We'll take the bottles. Bottle. One bottle. You
shitting me? We'll take it.
Hey, Sam. Got a little bachelorette party going on over there. I bet there's at least three
girls there that got some serious daddy issues. - Archie! - Huh? - You said you wanted to
dance. - Yeah. Now's your chance. Boy, these "Red Balls" vodkas are strange. I feel like
I'm getting drunk and electrocuted at the same time. And the music! Loud! Like
everything sounds alike. Like they're playing the same song over and over and over and
over again. I probably should get up and dance, but I'm used to having a partner
Certainly doesn't seem to matter to that fella. Maybe I'll give it a shot. Maybe not Well, if
they play something different. Oh, shit, maybe now. I'm talking to another person. Yeah,
but you should be talking to me. I'm more interesting. Come on. Go away, seriously. You
know, I just don't get it, all right? It's not like you're married yet. Just spread it around a
little before it gets dusty, you know? Ew. Look you little jerk-off, I don't wanna dance
with you. I don't wanna dance with you either. - Everything all right here? - Fanny Pack.
You... You guys are everywhere. What's your deal? Can I see that real quick? Buddy,
maybe you had too much to drink. Hey, pal, why don't you mind your business? You
don't wanna make a fool of yourself. You know what? If I want your opinion, I'll just beat
it out of you. - Hey, hey, hey, what's the problem? - Hey, hey, hey! What's going on?
Sam? Oh. Now I'm gonna enjoy this one, asshole. You know that? No one calls us names
except us. You understand? Paddy. Just get him out of here. - Take him out the side. -
We're going.
<i>And fill my heart with love</i> <i>For only you</i> <i>Only you</i> <i>Can make
this change in me</i <i>For it's true</i> <i>You are my destiny</i> <i>When you hold
my hand I understand</i> <i>The magic that you do</ <i>You're my dream come
true</i> <i>My one and only you</i> <i>Only you</i> <i>Only you can make This
change in me</i> <i>For it's true</i> <i>You are my destiny</i> <i>When you hold
my hand</i> <i>I understand</i> <i>The magic that you do</i> <i>You're my dream
come true</i> <i>My one and only</i> <i>You</i> <i>An ounce of ooh-la-
la</i> <i>A sweet temptation In my blue boudoir</i> <i>If you're feeling hungry</i
<i>I'll let you lick the spoon</i> <i>Come on over, baby</i> <i>Can I borrow a cup of
trouble</i> <i>From you?</i>
I used to be fun. She chose me, I mean, well, over Mr. Ladies' Man, Billy Gherson. That's
how fun I was. Ahem. We both wanted her, but she picked me. Picked me. And, uh, you
know, once I... I made her laugh so hard, she peed her pants. I used to be able to make
women laugh like that. Come on. You made me laugh. Yeah, but I didn't make you pee
your pants. Well, give it time. Hey, I didn't know her, obviously, but she sounds like the
kind of woman that wouldn't want you spending all your time being sad. - No, she
wouldn't. - So cut it out. It's enough already. - Just cut it out? - Yeah. Really. - Can I ask
you something? - Yeah. If I threw a party, would you be able to come? I might. Might's
good enough.
Sophie wouldn't want me hanging around the apartment in my bathrobe. <i>- No, she
won... - Shut up.</i> So I'm not gonna do that anymore, and I'm having a Bloody Mary.
I used to like Bloody Marys. Maybe I'll like them again. I'm gonna ask you something. Do
you love this Lisa girl the way I loved Sophie? She's a wonderful person, really great
human being. Well, that's great. I'll vote for her when she runs for Congress. Billy, you're
gonna be 70 years old. Tomorrow you're marrying a 31-year-old woman who you
proposed to at a funeral. Now, I don't give a flying crap about you but if I did, I gotta tell
you, I see a few red flags. Tomorrow I'm gonna ask you again if you love her. I expect a
better answer.
I just wanted to, uh, apologize for, uh... For last night. Uh, I was way out of line, and,
um, you know, I had too much to drink, and I am just really, really sorry. I throw myself
at your mercy. I was just downloading Dean on who you guys were. He didn't know that
you were the heads of four very influential East Coast families. Yeah, I had... I had no
idea. Well, I wouldn't expect a dickhead like you to know about legends like us. - I... I'm
a dickhead. - Knuckles. Knuckles. Knuckles, get the guy out of my sight. Yeah. You know,
you're a dumb little shit, you know that? - Oh, no, please. - You don't know who these
guys are? Archie Aces, Billy Bones, - Sammy the... - The accountant. - Yeah, the
accountant. - Ugh. Sammy the Stove, they call me. I cook the books. I'm just... I'm
sorry. What do we care about your sorrys? No, I know, I know, I know. I don't give a
damn about my sorrys. Just please.. Shut up, shut up. Just go get us some ice water
When that's done, you come back, you do some other things for us. Maybe Knuckles here
will let you wash his balls. Sorry, that was weird. - Four ice waters? - Go. - What was
that all about? - I... You were great. I... Maybe I overdid it. I, uh, obviously misread you
guys. You guys sold the shit out of that.
So, what do you guys want me to do? Nothing. No, today, you take the afternoon off,
have another drink, go to the spa. Save your energy. It's gonna be a big night for you
tonight. You got some thinking to do. And we got some recruiting to do. Yeah. We need
to recruit some talent, gentlemen. Yeah, I want the A-list. B... The double-D list. That is
the A-list, actually. I like this one, although, is she throwing up or crying'? Definitely
throwing up. By 6? My turn.
i>You gotta find yourself somebody</i> <i>You need to find yourself somebody</i>
<i>To love</i> Wow. You guys just cannot stay away from me. You wanna go
someplace? Um, let me just check with the crowd. Okay. When you sing, I feel like a
teenager. And isn't that your whole goal in life? - Ha, ha. - So sad. You're right. Can I ask
you a personal question? Ay, Ay... Okay, one personal question Why haven't you ever
gotten married until now'? Well, why should I? I get to do everything I want to do
whenever I want to. I mean, what's wrong with that? There's no mention of love? No, no,
no, I'm... I'm not the falling-in-love type. Okay. Truth is, there was only one girl in my
entire life that I fell in love with. I let her get away. Who was that? You shouldn't have
used up your one personal question. - Oh, you are holding on so tight. - Ha, ha. Oh, Mr.
Big-Shot, I know where I'm taking you. - Take a seat, please. - You have got to be
kidding. What's the matter, princess? Scared of heights? Yes, the princess is scared of
heights. Well, I won't think less of you if you throw up or cry. Actually, I might if you cry.
Please don't cry. - I won't cry. - Billy, I think I have to ask you one more personal
question Whoa! What? You're getting married tomorrow. What are you doing here with
me? Well, you know I'm getting married tomorrow. - What are you doing here with me'?
- Oh, see, I do have an answer. I...like you. I liked you from the moment that I saw you.
None of which matters if you love Lisa. Do you? What's...? No, no. No, no. Oh, no, no.
No! I knew you would like it. Oh, yeah, no, I love it, I love it! It's great. Oh, good,
because it goes up and down three more times. Oh, it... it's... What? Aah! For a minute
there, I thought you were trying to kill me. Well, you wouldn't answer my personal
questions, so I thought I needed to scare the answers out of you. All right, well, Paddy
and I, right? When we were kids, we were in love with the same girl. Sophie. She's the
one who got away? Yeah. First, you know, it was just two best friends competing for the
same girl, but as we got older, it got a little more complicated. One day, Paddy told
Sophie that she had to make a choice between the two of us. That night, Sophie came to
my house. You know, she was confused. She was young. So she picked you. Yeah. Yeah,
she came and saw me first. But everybody knew she belonged with Paddy. Everybody.
So I told her And then she went with Paddy. Does Paddy know? Oh, complicated. A little
bit. You know, the boys are throwing a party for me tonight. Yeah, I heard. Well, I would
really love it if you'd stop by. Complicated. A little bit.
Gentlemen, you have definitely outdone yourselves. Yeah, I got a little something, uh, for
you, my best men. - Paddy. - Aw, you shouldn't have. Archie. You should have. You
asshole. I can't believe this is your last night as a bachelor, Billy You better brace
yourself for tomorrow. But tonight, we're gonna party like it's 1959. I'm Stacy. Which one
of you is Sam Harris? (everyone raises hand) .
Thank you so much for standing up for us at the club. That was so awesome of you.
When you're from Brooklyn, uh, not getting involved isn't an option. I am so tired of
these young guys. They are so immature. Maybe I should spend some time with a man of
experience. Let me show you around.
Aces, I was just cleaning up over here. Ah, put that stuff down. - Go have some fun,
you've earned it. - Really? - Really. - Ah. Aces, thank you so much. Appreciate it. Oh, uh,
- before you go, Dean... - Uh-huh? Ask the girl to dance, don't tell her. Okay? Tell her
how beautiful she is, not how sexy she looks to you. Tell her that from the time she
walked in here, you have not been able to take your eyes off of her. - That's kind of true.
- Okay, then go for it. Definitely. I'll be damned.
Well, we were worried. You can't do this kind of stuff. You're not a kid anymore. You
know, you're right. I am not a kid. I'm a grown man, who just happened to go to one of
his best friend's bachelor parties. As a matter of fact, I shouldn't have had to lie about it
in the first place. - You could've had another episode. - Let's call it what it is. It's a
stroke, a mild stroke. And it won't recur as long as I take the damn pills. If it does, I'll
just die, then, won't I? Until then, Ezra... Look at me when I'm talking to you. Until then,
I am not a feeble old man. I've got a lot of life left in me, and I'm gonna live it doing the
things that I like to do. One of them is dancing, and the other one is having a drink. I've
danced. Now if you'd care to join me, I'd love to have a drink with my son. Heh, all right.
You just wait for me one second. I'm just gonna take a pill in the other room. Oh. I don't
need a pill. I'm so glad I met you. Did I happen to mention that I was married? - Really?
That's kind of hot. - It is kind of hot, isn't it? That's better. Hmm. The thing is... - You
don't want to have sex with me? - Oh, oh, no, no, no, I do, I do Oh, God, I want to have
sex with you. A lot of it. It would be... Oh, spectacular. It would be the most spectacular
thing that's happened to me in 25 years. Uh... Just_it... But... The thing is... Um... It's
crazy., But, uh, whenever something spectacular happens to me, first thing I want to do
is tell my wife about it, and, uh, after 40 years of marriage, uh, if I can't tell her about
something wonderful that happened to me, it sort of stops being wonderful. I
understand. - It... It has something to do with... - I mean, I get it, okay? - She has a
way of putting things. - Will you just stop talking? Heh. - What? - Stop. I really hope that
I get to marry a guy like you one day. Heh. I'm gonna get dressed. You know, uh, a
blowjob wouldn't be out of the question.
What do you keep looking at the front door for? It's Diana. I invited her to the party. I
like her. That's okay, isn't it? I mean, you said Sophie wouldn't want me to be miserable
the rest of my life, right? So... Right? No, listen, I got nothing to go home to anymore. I
got nothing, Billy. I mean, it's an empty house with a bunch of photographs. It's very
depressing. She, at least, makes me feel a little bit alive. And feeling a little bit alive is a
lot better than just waiting to die, right? Right? Are you...? Billy, what's...? Oh, my God.
01:22:42,082 Susan, hi. Uh-oh. You're getting married. - But you're a widower. - You
said Sophie would want me to move on with my life. - That's right. Exactly. - Well, you
know, I was wrong. You asshole! You are so cool! Diana. We gotta talk. Hey, don't even
think about kissing me until you've talked to your fianc. Paddy's gonna ask you out.
That's why I want to get to you first. Diana, you know he's completely alone. I just think
you gotta give him a chance. Okay. I thought... Well, that's completely embarrassing. I
guess I misunderstood. No, it's not like that. - No, it's not. It's not. - Well, what is it? Are
you just gifting me to him like you did his wife? - It's not the same as that. - Well, how is
it different? His wife had a choice to make. First she came to you. - You said, "No, choose
him." - Oh, stop it. - And so she did. - Diana, stop... How's it different? That true? What
she just said? Wow. Poof. Just like that, everything. I am so sorry. No, it's not your fault.
It's, you know... He's my best friend, you know?
We were kids, Paddy. You don't know women. What are you talking about? Look, Billy,
you don't know women the way I know them. You haven't shared a full life with anyone.
You don't know what that is You can't tell a woman who to love Especially Sophie. You
can't do it. I know what I had with my WIFE, Billy. Thanks to you. So I'm gonna ask you
one more time, you miserable prick. One more time. Do you love this woman you are
about to marry? Billy! All right, here's the deal: You end it, or I will. Hey, hey, you stay
out of this, all right? It has nothing to do with you. Hey, babe! I owe you this one. - Aah!
Lisa, my name's Patrick Connors. Although that imbecile in the pool there started calling
me Paddy when we were kids and it stuck. Oh, right. Paddy! It's so great to finally meet
you. - Yeah, nice to meet you. - Billy's told me so much. Why did you throw him in the
pool Ah, that's just an old game from the neighborhood. Listen, dear. Can I tell you
something? - Yeah. - Fifty years ago, Billy did something for me that allowed me to
marry the only woman I ever loved. And now it's my chance to return the favor. - I'm
sorry, I don't understand. - He's not in love with you. He likes you. I know he likes you a
whole lot, but he doesn't love you like the way that he should. I can't let him marry you.
He's my best friend. I can't let him marry you. Billy? I guess we gotta talk, huh? What is
he saying to her? That she's young, got her whole life ahead of her. Trying as best he
can to let her down easy. I'm sorry, I didn't catch your names. How do you think she's,
uh, taking it'? Mixed emotions.
I couldn't let you marry her. No, you did it right. You, uh... Congratulations, a good job.
- You mad? - No. No, you were right. Because, you know, if you're mad that's okay. No,
Paddy. I... I'm old. You know? And without her, uh... I'm just scared of being old. We
were 17, you know, five minutes ago. It was just yesterday. I just don't know where it all
went, you know? My brain cannot conceive how old this body is. Our girl's gone, Pat. And
I wasn't there at the funeral. And I'm so sorry about that. I let you down, man. And I
couldn't bring myself to say goodbye. Archie's got a stroke, and Sam, well, he's gone to
Florida. Man, it's just winding up a little too fast. And I'm feeling old and alone. You have
us. Yeah, Billy. God help you, you got us. And you got a hot little number singing her
heart out in some shithole across town, you lucky son of a bitch. Man.
<i>Only you</i> <i>Only you can make this Change in me</i> <i>For it's true</i>
<i>Oh, baby, you're my</i> <i>Destiny</i> <i>When you hold my hand</i> Is she
sick? That's it? You're not gonna finish? Shush. You got in for free. So how did she take
it? Well, she's probably in Malibu by now burning my house down, you know? It went as
well as you could expect. Poor kid. Are those for me? Hmm? Oh. Actually, um, no. I'm
sorry, um... Excuse me. On behalf of Binion's, I'd like to apologize for the delay in the
show, but, um... I'm really interested in the performer. She's the most amazing woman I
ever met, and I just can't believe in two days that she's, you know, inside my heart. But
I don't want her to know, because, you know, with gorgeous women, they like men that
like to play hard-to-get. True. Very true. Thank you. Okay, that worked. So you gonna
kiss me now, or, um, you want to hear more about how I'm falling for you'? Eye contact.
You... It doesn't mean anything without eye contact. I'm looking at you, baby. Mm, uh-
oh.
All right, kid, we'll take it from here. Time you went and hung out with some guys your
own age. And here's a little something for your troubles. - Wow, you sure? - No, I was
just putting you on. - Of course I'm sure. - You give the best advice. You breathe a word
about us to the feds, we will hunt you down. Uh, my lips are sealed, Mr. Accountant. -
Boys! What's up, fellas?
- Lonnie-boy! - All right, you ready to go? Packed? You got everything? Let me get this
off my chest. I've hosted superstars, I've hosted billionaires, I've hosted kings, and they
ain't got nothing.. I said they have nothing on the Flatbush Four, you hear me? Nothing.
And I remember, I heard this beautiful quote. It was, uh... "Ain't nothing in this world
that's deeper than loyalty and love, except for loyalty and love between thugs." Fifty-
Cent, man! Fifty! Hey, Lonnie, get a limo for our buddy here and take him out to the
airport to meet his friends. Thank you. Great party. - Let's go, wise guy, come on. - Let's
go. Okay, gentlemen. Who wants a drink? Drink? Oh, man, where the hell did you find
that? - Found it in the garbage. - Crack that puppy open, buddy. It's about time. Ah,
perfect, yeah. Okay. Okay, so, uh, here's to being invincible. Invincible. - Jeez. - Terrible
- Water. - I gotta go brush my teeth It can't go bad. It's Scotch. It's not so bad.
- France, Europe, Germany. You guys are the best thing that ever happened to me. Yeah.
I don't care how ugly you are. - Sixty years. - Yeah. - Hello? - Archibald, I got some
news. - Is it the prostate? - No, man, it's not my prostate. What's it with you and always
about the prostate, you know? Wait a minute, let me patch in the other guys, huh? - I
got that good cheese from France. - Good. - Mm-hm. - And a bottle of wine? - Hello? -
Hey, Paddy, it's Billy and Archie. - Why is the phone ringing? - Sam's not picking up.
<i>So, guys, you ready for this?</i> Diana and I are gonna get married. - Oh, wow! -
She's making a huge mistake. He says you're making a huge mistake. Yeah, tell him I
know. I know, Paddy. What about the five trips to the toilet every night? - I know it all. -
Congratulations. I'll call you later, we'll talk about the details, okay? We're heading to a
concert now at the park. - Oh. - Really? Is she attractive? - She'll do. - All right, guys,
well, I gotta get my grandbaby back inside. <i>I'll talk to you later.</i - Congratulations,
partner. - From me too. Okay, guys, talk to you later. - See you soon. - Bye. Attaboy.
We're gonna go again. - Go where? - We're going. What, are you cr...? Oh, no! Ha, ha
Enough's enough! Are you trying to kill me?