THE CREW

Editor in Chief ................................................................................................ Ian Adams

Editor/Design .................................................................................... Aaron Rosenberg
Editor ..................................................................................................................Jason Khieu
Press Relations .........................................................................................Jazmin Lucero
Head Photographer ........................................................................... Frankie Concha
Master Illustrator ................................................................... Mauricio Bustamante
Commander Illustrator ................................................................. Lawrence Alfred
Esquire Illustrator

..............................................................................Julia Izquierdo

Interim Photographer ......................................................................... Vivian Ortega

Interim Photographer

....................................................................... Eian Siddiqui

TABLE OF CONTENTS
To Speak the Unspeakable - Jade Sterling Simon

Put Simply - Dana Sami

The Story of Life - Gregory Poblete

12

The Story of Two Roommates - Gregory Poblete

15

The Story of the End - Gregory Poblete

18

Growing up on the Teenage Spaceship - Nathan Liclan

20

Free Cartoon

24

The American Gospel - Ian Adams and Josh Craft

25

Poetry

32

Hey Buddy! Yeah, you.

My Child, seek you meaning in this world of transgression?
If you be of the regular Modern Corsair congregation and or subscribers, welcome to another issue. But before the sermon proper starts we need to talk.
No, you did nothing wrong. (Except that one thing that you really enjoyed) We
want you to know that we are looking to bring on a new bunch of writers into the
fold. Now, if youre a creative sort you may be wondering what took us so long
to invite you. Sorry about that. It was lost by the old encyclicals. We though we
mentioned it at the thing your nephews christening. Regardless, we want you.
We want submissions from you. And heres how this can work: do you write fiction, poetry, essays, non-fiction, reviews, or have you ever in general organized
words so that on lookers might drive meaning from these shapes? If so you can
submit work to:
themoderncorsair@gmail.com
and well get back to you about if and when you can expect to see your labor of
devotion in are magazine. You can also feel free to send us comments or questions any time. Just put what youre submitting in the subject line of the e-mail.
You can also contact or keep up with Modern Corsair goodies on are Facebook,
Tumblr and Twitter accounts. Well be posing the next months themes and deadlines along with prompts. We hope to hear from a lot of you.
Amen.

You may now continue with the normal entertainment.

TO SPEAK THE UNSPEAKABLE

Jade Sterling Simon

Egypt, 1468 B.C. five years since Queen Hatshepsut officially took on the title of
Pharaoh. There is a celebration underway this evening. Lyre players, dancers, and
fire-eaters entertained the crowd of nobles gathered inside the courtroom of the
Pharaohs palace. Even the royal soldiers put on mock sword fights adding their idea
of excitement to the spectacle. The Pharaoh herself sits upon her throne; standing
beside to her was her steward, Senenmut.

He stood quietly beside his pharaoh hoping that the events taking place this
evening would distract from any personal side conversation. Unfortunately, he
would have no such luck. You cannot avoid the eyes of a god forever you know. He
flinched, startled by the sudden sound of her voice. He looked up to see the eyes of
his female king staring at him so intently he could have sworn they were the eyes of
Amun-Re himself. A thousand apologies my Pharaoh, I meant no disrespect, he
said quickly, trying to recover from his initial surprise. Senenmut, you never gave
me your answer. Have you given my suggested arrangement any thought? she
said matter-of-factly, all the while knowing it was not that simple on his part nor
hers. I am afraid I have not yet made my decision, he stated, allowing his gaze to
shift back towards the fire-eaters. The ferocity with which the flames flickered was a
clear reminder of the severe repercussions awaiting them should anyone uncover the
details of their conversation.

My Pharaoh, What did I tell you about that? she blurted in frustration.
Senenmut looked up to see that she too had diverted her attention towards the entertainment, which was a great deal of weight lifted from his shoulders. Hatshepsut, he restarted, you know this puts everything you have at great risk, your throne,
your life, your, My lover? Senenmut stopped at that. It was always that way with
Hatshepsut, finishing the sentences of others before they themselves complete the
thought in their own minds. Hatshepsut, I dont know if youve noticed, but there
have been whispers throughout the palace. People are starting to get suspicious,
Let them talk. Tis nothing more than the side conversations of servants, Its not
just the servants, Hatshepsut! he said a little louder than hed anticipated, causing
even the great Hatshepsut to sit up and take notice. For it was now he who inter-

rupted her, drawing a few glances from some of the guest partaking in the festivities. Lowering his voice, Senenmut continued, It is not just servants. Your stepson
has become suspicious as well. You know what the consequences could be if anyone
knew we were even discussing something so unspeakable.

They both were quiet for a while, allowing the music of the lyre to distract
them from their predicament if only for a moment. And for only a moment it was,
for again Hatshepsut who broke the silence. The kingdom is prosperous and peaceful, both by my hand. The people of this land will not be so quick to disgrace me on
the foundation of wild rumor and loose talk, she reassured him. Senenmut however
did not seem convinced, but he would not argue with her. Hatshepsut was a woman who did not back down easily. It was that strong, stubborn, confident part of her
personality that played a large part in her quest for the crown and her success in obtaining it. Your daughter is making great progress in her studies and will no doubt
prove a great leader once she is older, he tried changing the subject, hoping just this
once the Pharaoh would play along. Yes, she mused. She is the ideal child of Re.
But Senenmut, you have yet to answer my question.

He stared off into the distance, looking past the lively activities taking place,
deeply submerged in his own thoughts until Hatshepsut once again using nothing
more than her eyes commanded his full attention. Senenmut, you have always stood
by me, cared for Neferure as if she were your own, you supported and trusted me
since my coronation and long before then. I ask you to trust me once more. Trust
that I hold our world securely in my hands and that I would sooner lose both before
allowing any harm to befall those at my side. Whispers from commoner and nobleman alike, nor the deep rooted suspicions of my stepson will not cause the fruits of
our labor to wither. Even the grave robbers who desecrate our tombs long after were
gone will find nothing more than a fraction of the truth.

Senenmut breathed deeply, closing his eyes in defeat with a faint smile upon
his lips. Yes. It was always that way with Hatshepsut. You win again, my Pharaoh,
he said, as he always hoped she would.

PUT SIMPLY
Dana Sami
A sort of proviso before starting off: this months theme
lead me in one direction but I do want to talk about
how President Barack Obama signed into effect that
June is LGBTQ month. I missed the boat on that issue
but I want to say how great this is for the country and
many of my friends. Good job.

I had to have a long talk with myself when working on this. And I wont lie.
Much like Dan Howl this distressed my family. So the prompt I had was Religion
to work with. I took my damn sweet time to figure out what I could talk about here.
At first I thought about going out to Warner Springs, a place youve never been to
or heard of, past the hunting fields of Temecula, a place you should never go, and
report on the Lieu Quan meditation garden
where the four largest statues of the Buddha
in America are but I felt like that might be
cheap boiling down a place of religious reverence into a sort of tour guide. And also,
I did not want to drive that far out in the
dessert.

Then I thought about doing a memoir type thing on my time growing up in St.
Bartholomews from middle school to high
school. But some other guy covered that last
month and Im one of a few writers on staff
who can spout off some iteration of the best
way to make an atheist is to leave a child
in a Catholic school. I wont bore you with
that. No- see my official title on this ship is
arts correspondent. I got off a bit east on
my first gig with the Vogue photographer
doing a show a few miles from my work.

Art, I thought. Where can I find some art discussing religion? I went to LACMA, but
the religious art there is boring. The last supper and crucifixion and the saints all in
heaven mounted spotlights. They were all Italian artists like Botticelli, Bellini, Titian,
Donatello, Michelangelo, Rapael, Leonardo and Krang. But- that is just not interesting enough. Those are the names Jill or Jim learn off page one on day one of art history.

Then I went back to stew in my failure and the gas I wasted in LA trying to
park.so what do you know, inspiration hit when I stopped looking so hard for it. I
was watching a PBS marathon in the dead of night of Monty Pythons Flying Circus.

The second one on was an episode specially written and filmed in 1972 for
German television called Monty Pythons Fliegender Zirkus. Like too many of the
dilemmas in my life the answer I needed the whole time was in an early 70s British comedy. The first sketch they wrote for this hour special was called The Life and
Times of Albrecht Drer, thefamed German woodcut artist for the middle ages. And
as Michael Palin narrates over a lot of old woodcuts and drawings, one of Drers
themes of frequent visitation was religion.

Thats a bingo.

Then I head to the Getty to see the exhibit they had on Albrecht Drer. Parking is just as bad as LACMA but at
least the view from the water maze,
plateau is beautiful. Hunting around
the humongous place with glass ceilings pouring crisp California sunlight
down on me and the statues I did
find the installation I wanted. Most of
Drers work is actually quite humble and simplistic. His drawing called
Study of the Good Thief (reference
to the man promised paradise while
being crucified beside Jesus) is only
slightly bigger than a normal sheet of
college rule note paper.

I got the sense that the Getty
museum hasnt got time for that humbleness horseshit so they had a print
copy made of Drers Stag Beatle the

size of two men standing on the others shoulders

or a bakers dozen raccoons in one trench coat.
It seemed an odd topic to make a big fuss about.
When he had a gory depiction of a crucified man
or a depressed angel in Melancholy or in any other instances of angels delivering joyous news or the
devil learning in the brambles, the Getty selected a
stag beetle to be the big hoopla.

Learning the history of this though clarifies
the need of hoopla. In the intellectually repressed
age Drer lived in all life (and lives) were placed
on an ordered scale of significance. The highest
was the Christian God and the lowest the Devil
and everything on Earth ranked in between (institutional racism and sexism played into that but wed best get to that talk another day,
eh?). in descending order from the pope to king to lord to knight, to surf, to fool, to
the crippled to the animals, at the low end were insects. Drers point can be seen as
a theological one. He is viewing all Gods creatures great and small were made with
love. All the animals are equally deserving of respect, not just the fuzzy ones or the
ones who squat out eggs. So we see why the stag beetle, rendered in colors and detail
has a bigger religious implication and hence the ridiculous print of a bug drawing
that dominates one wall of the Getty.

But we need to pump the brakes one more time on this trip. As I wrote the first
and second drafts of this story out I realized as well intended as my examination of
Albrecht Drer, who I pompously presume none of
you will of heard of until I just told you about him,
I realized that the SS. Predictable had set course for
Redundant City (a port town). Im here thinking I
want to do something none of you will have heard
before. So I pick a European artist on the theme of
Christianity. Scrapping that shit with the delete key.
A move I only slightly regret for the loss of some
great Getty details.
Instead I looked to Asian art. Religion from Asian
(try and find a popular one not from that continent)
in a style unknown by a little spoke of artist. Now

thatll prove to
you all I deserve your attention and affection.

The artist I re-decided on talking about is from the same time period as Albrecht Drer, in Persia named Kaml ud-Dn Behzd. In the Los Angeles County
Museum of Arts Islamic art section there are none of his paintings, jus geometric shapes and
pottery. I could find no museums
that housed his work. And so, to
find this artist I was in desperate need of sharing I went on a
Google hunt. Behzd was what
is known as a Persian miniature
painter. It was not that the paintings were tiny. This style came
from the tradition of illuminated manuscripts a tradition also
found in Irland and Japan. Behzds work centered on religious themes even going as
far a depictions of the Prophet Muhammad. This of course in some sects of Islam is
considered blasphemous thought the Quran never expressly forbids it. Some may recall the backlash and farther escalation that came from Danish cartoonists depicting
the prophet in the magazine Jyllands-Posten or Matt Stone and Tray Parkers controversy with the episode Cartoon Wars.

Kaml ud-Dn Behzds work had a greater liberation than most contemporaries do to the channel through witch his art was viewed. Rather than hanging on
a wall or being a mural his work rested in books (not necessarily the Quran but religious texts) and so the owners of these books Behzd had illustrated in could use
discretion upon who could be shown what were then considered such sensitive images. Remember that the LACMA stuff with carved, repeating, mathematical patters
were the predominant artistic norm for Persia at this time in the 1400s. in these
works an influence from the Chinese style is present. The orientation of figures to
the color and very simplistic shapes used to more so represent than recreate like
Drers attempted to do. This simple line and color is quite obvious in Behzds best
known works The Assention of the Prophet and Yousef and Zuleykha. I started to
feel that Behzd was a stylistic inversion of Drer though both had a similar philosophical hunger. Drer would take one thing of great specificity and carve out as

much detail as her could and Behzd took grand moments

and put them as simply as he could. But what is it that unifies this all together? Is there anything like that?

There must be, my deadline is coming up and youve
read three pages of crazy jumping around.

And there is.

What unifies Drers beetle and the glittering beauty of
Kaml ud-Dn Behzds religious illustration and even those
enormous stone Buddha statues in the middle of a field one
brisk walk from the Mexican border is this: simplicity in
truth. I think of it in terms of a biological hunt for Occam
razor. Human nature is curious. We strive for truth. And the
complexity of the world can be daunting, causing us to seek the simplest truth, the
simplest path or the way of least resistance. In art we see both the artists interior and
the world he or she lived in at the time. We all seek meaning and truth and simplicity, and through these artists works we can see that. In most peoples lives faith lends
itself to those three human needs. Religion has a hero (Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha)
and a villain (Satin, the attachment to worldly goods) it gives clear guide lines of do
this and life will be good and religions give this world of nuance and endless freedom meaning through its restrictions. And that is comforting to millions.

I return to button this topic with my six silly muses: Monty Python. They
wrote a very funny game show sketch called Summarize Marcel Proust Competition
where in Graham Chapman was censored from claiming in his fun facts on himself
that his hobbies included Torturing animals, golf and, masturbation. I looked to
the author of Swans Way on what it is about the simple truth and art in humanity.
Proust said himself Only through art can we emerge from ourselves and know what
another person sees. We can see deeply yet simplistically, begging the question, is
anything ever that simple?

THE STORY OF LIFE

Gregory Poblete

If you havent noticed by now, these reviews are actually an excuse for me to watch the
movies in my Netflix queue (I refuse to call it a Netflix list because queue sounds so much
cooler) because I more often than not would rather watch 50 episodes of a television show in one
sitting than actually watching a 90-minute film. Cents.
One of the movies gathering dust in my Netflix queue was Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life
(1983). The reason I thought I wanted to watch this movie was because I saw a few clips of Monty Python and the Holy Grail in my mythology class last semester and witnessed a few giggles
being produced by my body. However, I had no idea what I was getting into by committing myself to an entire Monty Python film without any context.

For those of you that are extreme Python fanatics, please excuse this brief summary of
the Wikipedia article about Monty Python. Monty Python is a British surreal comedy group
including Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, and a few other comedians. Similar to
Seth Rogen and the Francos, the Monty Python group created numerous works together such as

Monty Pythons Flying Circus, And Now For Something Completely Different, and the fan favorite, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. As for Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life, the group
tries to find some reason for existence through comedic situations and songs.

If you are familiar with Monty Pythons work, then you will not be surprised to hear that
this film was all
over the place. One
minute this movie
is showing an office
filled with businessmen being attacked
by file cabinets and
the next minute
theres a city of peoplesinging about
how every single
sperm is useful.
However, there was
a point to all the wackiness and that point is finding the meaning of life. The film goes through
the many stages of life such as birth, growth, and death, and explains each stage in a humorous
but very insightful way. For example, the main religious section of the film regarding the topic of
growth and learning describes how there are many different religious practices that seem ridiculous because well, they are. The movie made a giant contrast between the beliefs of Protestants
and Catholics saying that Catholics only have sex for procreation and they believe that wasting a
sperm for sexual desires makes God quite irate while Protestants believe condoms were created
for people to enjoy sex without having a child. Another aspect of religion that was poked fun at
was the way in which people pray to God describing him as a giant, starving monster and the
reason for their prayer is to beg God not to grill them on his heavenly barbecue.
The film overall displayed ideas
of existentialism emphasizing that
the individual has the power to live
their own life the way they choose.
In a scene where a couple is having
dinner in a restaurant, they begin
to have a discussion about different
philosophers and how they came to
their own definition of the mysteries of existence. One of the philosophers names that were thrown
around in this conversation was
Nietzsche.


If you have taken any philosophical class
or are just a complete nerd, then you will know
that Friedrich Nietzsche is a German philosopher
whose main focus was the concept of existentialism. Although in the film, the couple having this
conversation does not explain who Nietzsche is at
all but only states the fact that his name contains
the letter s, which I suppose is a pretty important
fact. But being a filmmaker, you dont just drop a
name like Nietzsche halfway into the movie and
not expect a bored English major reviewing your
movie to not overanalyze why you stated this
name in your film. Am I right? I mean, thats the
whole point to existentialism: to figure it out by
yourself. I know thats a weird thing to think about
but religion is just an excuse for people to think
they know the meaning of life but in reality, reli-

gion is just a guess of what life is all about.

And I think thats what Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life has attempted to discuss through
their insane humor. Even at the end of the film, a character states the so-called Meaning of Life
in a few sentences making it seem like this movie was the one piece of media that actually got it
right but the beauty of life is that no one really knows what it all means and thats pretty fucking
cool.

So, for my verdict of Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life, I will give it 2 talking fishes
out of 5. As much as I love Emma Watson, I just cannot get myself to enjoy British comedies. I
mean, if Emma Watson was in the movie, I would probably love it because Emma Watson is in
it and everything she does is wonderful because just look at her. But she wasnt even born when
this movie came out so theres no way that she could have been in this movie. What was I saying?
Not to brag or anything, but despite being able to analyze the meaning of this film pretty well, it
just was not my cup of tea. Get it? Because tea. British people drink tea. Yeah. Im hilarious. I am
more than certain that other people
will enjoy this movie though because
people love British stuff like Doctor
What? and Sherbolt. If you enjoy
watching parody movies like Scary
Movie or any others that I cant think
of, then youll probably shed some
laughter-induced tears during this
movie.

THE STORY OF TWO ROOMMATES

Gregory Poblete

First of all, I just want to say that
I am extremely excited that this issues
theme is religion because everyone
knows that the easiest way to rally up a
storm of outraged and passionate Holy
Spirit-followers in a comment section
on the Internet is by taking stabs at
their supernatural beliefs. Did I leave
out every other single religion besides
Christianity in the previous sentence just
to poke fun at how simple it is to offend
people on the Internet? Possibly. But
if you have been reading The Modern
Corsair for the past two issues now, then
you know that it is time for a review of
something ridiculous. Not to be Justin
Bieber or anything, but the Japanese are
quite infamous for creating absolutely
bizarre commercials, extremely wacky
game shows, and undoubtedly unique
cartoons known as anime. If you are unaware of this truth, please visit wtfjapanseriously.com right now and discover for yourself the reason why the Japanese culture is
beloved by everyone around the world. Now that we have that squared away, let us
discuss an anime involving Jesus Christ and Gautama Buddha living as roommates
in an apartment in Japan. I am by no means a professional when it comes to discussing the genre of anime (the most anime I have seen is Pokmon and a few episodes
of Avatar: The Last Airbender) but I am pretty sure an anime about Jesus and Buddha living together in Japan has never been done before. Originally a manga series
written and illustrated by Hikaru Nakamura, Saint Young Men was adapted into a
very short lived anime series in 2012 and later a full length film in 2013. I will be
discussing the first episode of the Saint Young Men anime series.


Exactly why do Jesus and Buddha live together in an apartment in Japan? Because they can. I think. To be quite honest, the plot of Saint Young Men does not
make any sense. How is it possible that two very different religious figures can live
together under one roof on Earth and live normal lives surfing the Internet and eating food just like normal humans when in fact they are all-powerful beings? Why

do Jesus and Buddha try so hard to keep their miraculous powers a secret from the
human race? If religion on Earth exists, then why should their identities be kept a secret? Why are they trying to live a normal life rather than watch over the entire human population? And why are they young? I have no clue. However, besides all these
unanswered questions, this was probably the most entertaining 22 minutes of media
I have witnessed all summer.
The main plot of the first episode of the series is basically Jesus and Buddha
finding an apartment to live in Japan and trying to live in harmony with their strict
landlady. When we meet the landlady, she introduces her list of commandments
that must be followed by anyone living in her apartment or else she will kick them
out. When we meet Jesus and Buddha on the other hand, they seem to be quite intimidated by this woman. Despite being the individuals who they are, the Jesus and
Buddha characters in this series seem to be a lot less mighty than their respective
religions describe them to be. For example, there is a scene where Jesus is feeding the
birds in the neighborhood and the landlady has a fit because her 9th commandment
is You mustnt feed stray animals. Among some of the other landladys commandments include such rules as You must respect your parents, You mustnt incite an
assembly and You must pay your rent. I find it to be quite ironic that two different
Gods are living in an apartment where they must follow a set of rules, while the rest

of the world follows the

set of rules that have
been created for their
own religious followers.

Even though the
means of watching this
episode of Saint Young
Men was through a
sketchy third-party
website with so many
advertisements around
the video player that
it looked like Times
Square for anime enthusiasts as well as only
being able to be viewed
in Japanese with English closed captioning, it was extremely enjoyable. Just the
fact that someone thought creating a series about Jesus and Buddha living together
would actually be a good idea is funny enough for me. But the humor of this series
is very playful like when Buddha gives Jesus a rock to eat expecting him to be able
to transform it into actual food. Or even the fact the Jesus owns a laptop and spends
time surfing the web is a very interesting characteristic for the Son of God. Overall,
I believe that Saint Young Men does not try to criticize religious practices or anyone
that believes in these religious figures but I think they attempted to find a new way
to express that no matter what religion you practice, we can all live in harmony together just like Buddha and Jesus. My verdict of the first episode of Saint Young Men
is 4 floating halos out of 5 because immediately after watching it, I wanted to watch
more. I know that there is a movie of Saint Young Men somewhere on the Internet
so I hope that will feed my taste buds for now, but I hope this addiction does not
lead to me learning how to read Japanese and buying the entire manga series. I dont
have time for that. I havent even caught up on Mad Men.

THE STORY OF THE END

Gregory Poblete

The final member of this trio of reviews for this issue is Paul Middleditchs
2013 film, Rapture-Palooza. First of all, I know how stupid that title sounds and
secondly, it actually wasnt as stupid as I expected it to be. Starring Anna Kendrick
(Pitch Perfect, 50/50), John Francis Daley (Freaks and Geeks) and Craig Robinson
(The Office, Pineapple Express) this movie follows a couple living a post-rapture
Earth ruled by the Antichrist played by Robinson. Lindsey (Kendrick) and Ben (Daley) are some of the few people still left on Earth because they did not believe in the
Bible so they are stuck on Earth to suffer! Set in Seattle, Lindsey and Ben get used
to living in an almost apocalyptic world filled with fiery rocks hurdling towards
Earth, annoying lotuses, and raining blood and find that it is not that bad until a
politician named Earl Gundy takes over the Earth because he is possessed by Satan. Coining the new name The Beast, Gundy settles down in a mansion in Seattle
while enjoying blowing up stuff and basically doing anything he wants because he is
the Antichrist.
Although being stuck on Earth for an entirety is essentially a living hell, Lindsey and Ben try to make the most out of it by trying to open up a sandwich cart for
the rest of the humans that were left behind on Earth. And as soon as things begin
to look up for the happy couple, a giant fiery rock crashes down on their cart and all
their dreams are ruined. So in order to make some money to buy a new cart, they
both decide to work with Bens father who works with The Beast. Despite being an
extremely dangerous job, working for The Beast is literally the only way to make any
money on Earth. But things begin to get interesting when The Beast falls in love at
first sight with Lindsey. Being the Antichrist, The Beast can do whatever he wants,

whenever he wants, to whomever he wants, and what he wants is to have sex with
Lindsey. And he is not shy about it. However, Lindsey doesnt seem to have any mutual fondness towards The Beast because he is just a sex-thirsty dude and she is, well,
Anna Kendrick. Not that Craig Robinson and Anna Kendrick couldnt be a couple
in real life because that could totally happen if they really wanted to, Im not here
to judge, but really though, they just dont fit together. The Beast gives Lindsey the
ultimatum that if she does not decide to marry him in eight hours, he will kill her
and everyone she knows because hes the Antichrist and he can do that. Afraid of his
girlfriend having sex with The Beast and losing her forever, Ben steps in to save her
and thereby setting the plot of the movie in motion.

Not to cut this review short or anything, but that is basically the plot of this
movie without ruining the ending. Rapture-Palooza is definitely one of those movies that you will enjoy while youre watching it but you really dont need to see a
second time. Despite saying that, I actually really enjoyed watching this movie. To
be honest, if Anna Kendrick was not the main girl of this movie I might not have
liked it as much because who doesnt think Anna Kendrick is adorable? As for Craig
Robinson, every one of his lines in this movie was brilliantly executed and perfectly timed and I applaud him for that. He is one of those guys that you know is really
funny, but you forget that he is funny and then you see him in a movie and youre
like, Oh, its Daryl from The Office. Oh, hes really funny. Ha! Something like that.
As for the connection with religion, this movie plays with the idea of a modern-day
rapture and how some people might react if the world was taken over by the devil.
Rapture-Palooza shows that believing in a certain religion does not necessarily make
you a good person, it just
means that you can get
into heaven. So if you dont
want to be stuck on Earth
with a sex-crazy Craig Robinson, then you better start
reading Genesis. I will give
Rapture-Palooza 3.5 foulmouthed crows out of 5 because it was actually a fun
movie and Anna Kendrick.

GROWING UP ON THE
TEENAGE SPACESHIP
Nathan Liclan
Q: So to get us started: What is
your name and current occupation?

was kidding myself and began to

seriously pursue a career in animation.

GH: My name is Geneva Hodgson, and Im a cartoonist! I currently work full-time as a character designer in the animation
industry as well as making comics
and drawing in my spare time.

Q: Have you always known that
a career in animation was something you wanted to explore?
GH: More or less! When I was really little, I was obsessed with animation, especially those weird boring-but-beautiful Disney shorts
from the 40s. I think I learned a
lot about drawing from copying
drawings of Mickey Mouse and
friends. As I got older, I lost interest in old cartoony western stuff,
but continued to be interested
in feature animation and anime.
By the time I was a preteen I assumed I would never actually be
good enough at art to do it for a
living, so there was this weird lost
decade where, even though I still
drew quite often overall, I was trying to convince myself that I was
just meant to do something else. It
didnt actually end until my final
year of college, when I realized I

GH: I partially credit a rediscovery of cartooniness with finding

that confidence.
Q: What do you think it was that
caused you gain that confidence?
Because Im sure as a young person growing up, the pressure to
follow a more secure career path
is overwhelming.
GH: Oh, yeah, definitely. Especially when you dont come from
money, and you dont really have a
lot of role models for that kind of
thing around. When I was young,
part of the problem was a lack of
vision, and being very aware of the

financial risks involved. In college,

I knew Id have student loans to
reckon with, so I chose to pursue
art education thinking itd be an
easier way to pay off those loans
in the end.

I think I found a lot of the
confidence when I found a certain
blog that celebrated cartooniness,
and it gave me a completely fresh
set of eyes to view drawing with.
I was able to remember some
of the earliest stuff I loved about
drawing-- the way the pieces fit
together perfectly, the physicality of animation, the joy of clarity
in cartooning. It really lit me up.
It was exactly what I needed, at
a particularly personally difficult
time in my life when I needed to
devote myself religiously to something.

It all came together when
I got what I felt was a sign from
above-- a particular instructor in
the program I was in had picked
a fight with me, and instead of
arguing with her, I just dropped
out of her program. I was lucky
that the head of the school of art
found this professors actions unreasonable, so I was able to quickly switch majors right before my
final semester of school-- I would
have been student teaching, but
instead I wrapped up a degree in
2D fine arts.

I look back on that as my
turning point-- I finally just admitted to myself, duh, Ive always
wanted to be a cartoonist-- not a
teacher. Ive never not wanted to
do that.
Q: You could say the pieces began

to fit together perfectly-- like a

drawing. Now these ideas of realizations, growing up often appear
in your work. What was the inspiration for the comic Get Rings?

GH: Ha! Youre right, actually. I guess I am always chasing that feeling of bigger pictures
coming together from nonsense.

Get Rings comes from a
pretty pure place-- Ive been playing Sonic the Hedgehog 2 my entire life. My favorite character is
Tails, and I think one of the most
fascinating pieces of it is the special stage. Its imagery is so strange
and unique, and my entire life Ive
been trying to get those chaos emeralds.

I feel like an important part
of Get Rings is that I wrote it as a
person who had been playing that
game for 20 years. I was thinking

about how this AI Tails has been

doing this for 20 years with me,
and I dunno, it was really funny
to me. A lot of people tell me that
comic is depressing, which kind
of surprised me.
Q: Haha! Well, your work in cartoonfuntime.com and Teenage
Spaceship-- and pardon me if Im
wrong-- shows a lot of profound
insight in life. Mainly, in life you
hold onto what you can and enjoy
it for what it is. Shifting gears, do
you have any advice to give to aspiring animators?
GH: I really appreciate you saying that-- its very kind. Ive actually never had somebody describe
my work on such terms before,
but now that you mention it, I
guess a lot of my work is about
acceptance. Im not sure if Id call
it profound, but I think it is really
important to me, and I do try to
make work on what I feel is important, so its nice to know that
that is getting through.

For aspiring animators... I
dont know. Theres a lot of advice
out there already, and I feel like
theres a bit of a fixation on advice for young people who want
to work in animation. Theres this
weird cycle in the culture, of people who love to give advice and
people who demand it. Dont get
me wrong, it feels great to give
advice! But I see a lot of strangers
basically demanding my friends
to validate their career choice. Its
kind of strange. All I can say is-animation is still a job. It works for
me, but I still have to set aside time

to do my own things, like I would

have to do even if I didnt draw for
a living. Dont kill yourself for art,
ever, especially not to make someone elses art. Try to be a normal
person-dont congratulate yourself for your specialness too much.
You arent too good to go to a party. Think about how other people
feel. Learn things outside of animation. Watch a movie for adults.
Dont ask complete strangers how
they got their job or why people
like them- its vaguely accusatory
and rude!
Q: Now, penultimate question-do you have anything to plug?

GH: Ha! Do you mean, like,
my own work, or recommended
artists/reading?
Q: Lets try both!
GH: Haha, sure! Well, I have
an art tumblr:http://cartoonfuntime.tumblr.com and right now
my biggest project is http://teenage-spaceship.com, which is updating weekly.
For recommended artists,
its hard to choose-- but I think
Leslie Hung (http://milkmanner.
tumblr.com) is doing some of
the most exciting modern cartooning/illustration out there.
Her work is so beautiful and shes
been doing more comics lately,
and plans on doing more. Another artist who really excites me is
Tiffany Ford (http://toffany.tumblr.com), who does a lot of beautiful artwork, and has also been
doing more comics lately. Lamar

Abrams (http://neo-rama.tumblr.
com) is an old favorite-- hes been
doing comics for a long time, and
he is definitely a big inspiration
for me, and looking to him has
helped me solve some problems
Ive had on Teenage Spaceship. I
think, also, that I should mention
that I looked at a lot of the Floyd
Gottfredson Mickey comics, especially the early ones, when doing
Teenage Spaceship. I wont flatter
myself by saying it shows, but I
think his work really carried me
through some grim times when
trying to figure out backgrounds.

swer really counts, which is the

Sonic the Hedgehog comic books.
Ive been reading them since I was
7, and theyve undeniably made a
bigger impact on my life than basically any other piece of print. Its
been with me for most of my life,
and definitely was an early source
of my love of cartooning, storytelling, and reading in general.

The Giver by Lois Lowry
was the first chapter-book I can
remember truly connecting to. A
lot of the themes of beginning to
see the boundaries of your own
culture and context definitely
resonated with me, and that will
probably be apparent in Teenage
Spaceship as it goes along.
Q: Cheat-y answers are fine! No
wrong way to answer an interview
about yourself. Well, thank you so
much for your time, Ms. Hodgson.
GH: Youre so welcome!! Youre a
very kind interviewer, haha.

Q: And finally, as we are a literature magazine, what was the first

book that left an impact on you?
GH: Hmmm-- I have to give one
of those cheaty multiple-answers,
since Im not sure if my truest an-

FREE CARTOON

THE AMERICAN GOSPEL

Ian Adams
and
Josh Craft

We are well aware of the divergent paths that Christianity can take. We are aware that even
within the sects individually there are great differences from regions or even individual families.
America is a Christian nation. We feel that that statement is indisputable in so far as the Gallup
poling placed 77% of the 313 million citizens at identifying as 'Christian.' The trouble with this,
as many things widely popular in America, this tends to mean that with such a wide applicability
there are many different sorts of person who might be Christian. This trouble comes when the
government is represented by political players who interpret their view of Christianity to be that
shared by the majority who voted them into office. This comes well into the deep problem Ian
found when waiting for something good to come on TV until the next episode of Fargo came on.

The American Bible Challenge was the name on the screen that gave me pause. From the
final 25 minutes of programing one of us caught we gathered that this was a game show hosted
by Jeff Foxworthy (all American, blue-collar, You-Might-Be-A-Redneck) comedian where in
three teams of three in silly outfits with sillier names (The Bible Belts, with gis and martial arts
belts, or the Rockin Rabbis, or the Holy Rollers, as in women from a roller derby group) play
against one another in trivia competitions to win fabulous cash prizes in the seventh and holiest
round The Final Revelation. And that was the position we held for quite a time. We thought
It happened. It finally happened. America has found a way beyond selling copies of it, to make
cash off the Bible. And the way they have done so is in a tragically American style of degrading
a long history and cultural practice to converting religious scripture to auto corrected texts or if

a quote used if from the verses or from

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic or
Christ or Klingon where in contestants
deliberate on whether the vocabulary
shown to them was from the red ink
parts of the Bible or from Star Treks
most feared race. But then we learned
that there is far more complexity to this
at first seemingly sacrilegious grab bag
of misappropriation and capitalizing on
the blindly faithful.

In the positive, and if we are to be
called a writer of any value either of us
can concede that there is a positive it is,
the contestants of this program do not
keep the fabulous cash prizes they have
earned through seven rounds of tribulation. No, the money will in fact go to
a deserving charity of that groups choice. Separate we investigated and to the best of our ability
these charities are unimpeachable services. There is nary a build a damn boarder fence fund or
lobby against Planned Parenthood request or even a Smear the Queer Fred Phelps type coterie.
Some groups donated to relief funds to the damage done by hurricane Sandy on the East coast,
some donate to charities against human trafficking, to support battered women shelters, soup
kitchens and homeless shelters. And as sarcastic a jerk as Josh or I am, there is nothing to mock,
or deride about any of the charitable funds we researched. These were genuinely kind acts going
to deserving people. And even outside of the charitable donations of cash their visit to the American Bible Challenge set brings most contestants seem like objectively pleasant people who work
at community building, suicide prevention, and undoing the damage of addicted lifestyles.

That is not to say we had been completely turned on our opinion. Jeff Foxworthy said that
his opinion on hosting the American Bible Challenge is Some of my happiest times have been
seeing my children having a good time, laughing. I feel like God is the same way with his children. Some sticks in the mud they may they might say no you cant have fun with that topic,
well I say theyre wrong. And that is where it goes south for this program the number on the
GSN network for the three years its been running. There is no substantial complaint one can
hold for the contestants or the host or the shows musical star Kirk Franklin a well-known gospel singer and choir leader. The complaints against the show are twofold. And its not even the
flippant way they treat religion (as it is obviously enjoyed and hosted by a great deal of devout
Christians who have no problem with watching aged nuns lob forks into plastic cubs for a few
grand. Although- way to class up your global perception America). All my problems are with the
show itself. Firstly, the fact that we have now reached a Hunger Games level of evil in the ambi-

ent backgrounds of are light entertainment.

What is meant most specifically is that though all the charities the contestants are playing
for are good and noble ones: they are playing to help good and noble charities. Why do we watch
people play to ease the suffering of others? Why do people need to play a game where they name
as many sorts of kosher animal as possible to keep an orphanage open? Isnt that really just finding a way to prophet off peoples want to help? We are not saying this work shouldnt be done.
This is great that money is going to protect minors from a sex trade, or give tribes in the developing world clean drinking water but shouldnt that be the end of it? If the funds exist to help these
people it shouldnt be contingent on whether one tattoo parlor owner who also teaches a Sunday
school can name three of the judges from the Book of Judges. Even though the two losers will
still take home 25 thousand or so to their chosen fund, its still wrong.

Ideally, really, the money should be evenly distributed out three ways each week to three charities that are each wonderful and necessary in their own way and then have an hour-long Bible
study. People would watch that right?
Perhaps this is the ultimately disconcerting, far more dire implication of this bizarre,
excessively thought-provoking spectacle--an utterly contemporary production which seems
almost designed to be a thought experiment for the study of culture, if not at least a provocation
(assuredly that indeed)--the essential moral suggestion at its heart; not about Christianity itself,
but about the America of the shows thoroughly loaded title. Have we indeed graduated to such a
particularly alienated outpost of civilization that the televisually-diminished and capitalistically
dominated ethos of the consumer/viewer pathology have completed obscured our natural sense
of morality and empathy (ergo, sociopolitical awareness of the disadvantaged, and an ensuing
impulse toward charity which becomes increasingly supported by even famously cold evolutionary biology)? To put it cutely, has the godliness of The Image cleansed us from the burden
of acting in His Image? There have been many reality shows featuring acts of goodwill which are

focusedly brutal in their emotional onslaught, among them the tanned Ty Penningtons Extreme
Makeover: Home Edition, as well as Undercover Boss (though you would not expect it from the
title). The former produced by Tom Forman of The American Bible Challenge. But the appeal
of these shows derives not from our intrinsic thankfulness that such charity is being exacted out
there in the world, but rather the dramatized emotional currency of the participants reactions.
The piquing of any natural human empathy is incidental to the standard, preconfigured consumer experience of witnessing vague characters (not people) exhibit traditional manners of being.
But the charity of the American Bible Challenge occurs off-screen. Instead, the spectacle is not
the emotions therein, but the lavish noise during which the good deed is amassed. And is this,
perhaps, oddly, an admirable turn? That, in this case, we do not make real what is really real?
That we do not exploit or diminish the breathing fact in the world of something kind and constructive being done, and instead stick to showing show business? Sure, perhaps these acts of
charity should not have to leap through circus hoops in order to happen, but this is a madhouse
culture. What does not have to first translate through the veils of consumption and spectacle in
order to be understood (in becoming understandable, homogenous, pleasant, marketable static).
In this sense, does the American Bible Challenge stand in precise opposition to familiarly capitalist and savage American Christianity, which uses television to take money from endeared
viewers? Through all of its irksome fanfare and ridiculous context, does ABC give back what
TBN takes away? Must the Sermon On the Mount be rewritten into idiocy to be viable cultural
doctrine?

And this relates to another concerning trend that is very American related to the countrys
Christian-ness. Jeff Foxworthy will each week introduce nine Americans you are sure cant be
any more American; a preacher who is in a Stetson and cowboy boots, or a ladies team in baseball shirts. Americans tend to think, in large majorities, of Christianity as an American thing
in the way that austerity is a Russian thing
or sarcasm is a British thing, that these
elements are intrinsic, immutable and sort
of natural to the system. They treat that
faith in the states as if it were the skin of
the back of the countries hand- unremarkable to how innate and intrinsic it is to the
entities existence. One may think that it is
an attitude because Christianity is such a
long standing faith in the country that it
can seem natural, for certain types of people. We would say that a majority of these
people are descendants of the first waves
of immigrants to the continent, who were
predominantly Protestant, who threw a
kick up when the second wave of mostly

Catholic Americans arrived. So tradition as one part and the other was that group reaffirming
the American-ness of believing in Jesus. Which would have in part been a learned behavior from
the English, see Anglican hymns like Did those Feet in Ancient Times? about Jesus wandering
around Glostenberrys fields. This attitude has left a lot of American Christians very uncomfortable about directly acknowledging that their form of belief comes from the Middle East, a
culture alien to them and one they might belittle, as many did through the decades since Israel
reformed, and feel that it is a backward, tribal place full of mystics and the dangerously uneducated. Yet simultaneously thinking that this Bible is the word of the one true God at least never
led to someone taking it even farther and claiming an entire religious sect around Jesus coming
to America, or the idea that Native Americans used to be white before angering the wrath of
Yahweh, or that the Garden of Eden was in Missouri.

And indeed, an array of beliefs which requires a graven faith, and a severe devotion to
maintain this faith, often births extremity anew. Leaps in reason that rival and eclipse that of
ancient sacred texts. The embittered, mutant logic which undyingly steps to the task of infinite
reapplicability and fluid justification. It is a process, a project. Let us be reminded about Mormonisms spotty history with race relations, and the way that the decrees of gods tend to conform
to the times just as much as the reverse is true. But religion just as often demandsperhaps far
more usuallythat one refuse the overwhelming reality of the outside moral and/or reasoning
world and take the fetal choreography of the oblivious martyr (see Creationism). Aside from its
essential medications to basic existential quandaries, religion is an arbitrary phenomenon by
all counts. As above described, the American Bible Challenge highlights the cultural aspect of
this shiftability in its implications of Christianity as the national religion, referring as well to a

very specific vision of America. But this is merely reflective of the larger reality at hand, which
is that Christianitythat is; Protestantism, has become entirely assimilated into an accessible
and simplistic identity. It is an identity, not a mode of action (the two are certainly not exclusive,
but here we find an imbalance). Nothing escapes the specter of commodification in our country,
at least nothing important (like personal philosophy), and ergo what we refer to as Christianity
in America is a consumable brand demanding a herd partake not in the lone treks and strange
spectral epiphanies (despite its penchant for belief in the violently, theatrically supernatural) of
Old World spirituality, but relegate and reduce the surreal and grandiose intrigue of the Bible to
something not out of place in an SUV ad. The American Bible Challenge, despite its genuinely
Christlike endeavor of charity, certainly does nothing otherwise to challenge this, but is that perhaps enough anyway?

The second of the larger points we had comes back to the wide nature of the show. It is
actually very innocuous, though claiming to have a wealth of Bible lessons. The American Bible
Challenge is mostly a game of remembering ancient Hebrew names or lists or the order of the
commandments and not so much how women ought to be or name three sorts of people the
Bible said its okay to kill. But from that wide base comes some unpleasant connections. You get
one of the most vocal supporters of the show noted hate monster and host of the 700 Club Pat
Robertson (of 9/11 is a divine judgment of our acceptance of Feminists, and also equating gay
marriage to bestiality and child molestation, and that the Haiti people brought on the earthquake that devastated the country by making a pact with the Devil years ago to remove the
Prince). Another supporter is Richard Glickstein, a producer on the film adaptation of the book
Heaven is for Real in which a Midwestern pastor ruthlessly used his sons near-death experience as an excuse to cash in on Christians across the US and people in general frightened of
dyeing, with a story of Jesus on a rainbow colored horse (not made up or to insult the faithful,
but a genuine excerpt from his book). So, this wide inclusiveness invites a diverse audience that
may swing to the far right of all the terrible hypothetical Christian ideas suggested earlier in the
article or to the middle ground pleasant kind persons like Doris Thompson who made news
recently when she pulled her great-granddaughter from Timberlake Christian School for making
disparaging remarks regarding the girls dress and behavior, by having a short haircut and liking
to collect hunting knives and
coins. Doris Thompson is
a faithful Christian woman
of a much older generation
who said Its preposterous,
them saying my home is
teaching sexual immorality.
If my child grows to be a
homosexual or transgender,
than I love that child that
much more. The trouble is,

for the American Bible Challenge, one cant be sure if they are furthering the deep Christian love
of soul guardian Doris Thompson, or the greed and malice of the Robertsons in the world.

So the American Bible Challenge is more ignoble in some regards than it can be said to be
a paragon of Christlike attributes we should seek to emulate. Surely unlike a great deal of other
programing that performs charity there is no remorseless exploitation of the poor, ugly, and uneducated in its path to doing good like an Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Undercover Boss,
or whatever child-sexualizing, intellect-belittling, obesity-snickering swill TLC is attempting to
pump into homes. The show knows what it is. It is marketing the commodity of Christian faith,
by virtue of using the most high-profile, most devout people they know to star and play on the
game. Those county fold, humble nuns, and inner city kids, we have not a doubt, care very much
for the positive good they are causing directly by knowing whether or not first century Jews
could eat gecko or flick spoons into glass cups (we may have said it before but it was mortifying
watching three nuns in their white habits perform summer camp activities). This show may be
an inoffensive hour of programming for an American family who would like to hear things tangentially related to their holy book. It may be a reaffirmation to some of the sort of life they wish
to lead, filled with cheesy, family oriented fun and great deals of selfless generosity. But it must
be reminded that as many good, wholesome Christians work on, play, and watch the American
Bible Challenge, there are still Richard Glicksteins, Pat Robertson, Michael Medveds or (so much
negative to say well save it for another column) Rush Limbaughs who will turn a profit off of
other peoples faith regardless of what they happen to actually think. Because there is money in
controversy, in the Right (politically and theologically), and so long as something as seemingly
self-contradictory as an afterlife proof movie or a show called the American Bible Challenge
exists, there are men who will sweep in to collect great mounds of cash for that. And what could
be more American than that?

A Land of No Nights
Nicholas Vasquez
My mid-autumn strolls along the golden state,
are forever summers twilight.
Honey amber skies allies the
Bonny dragons, who whisper to
dying cats in alleyways
Tu fui, ego eris
And among this island of furry flesh and silver whiskers,
Is one black as an eyelash
with a broken eye made of glass and echoes of its
Past.
The cat of dreams who
Now stood before
I, the Shepards crook
with my pretty little book filled
with gobbledygook, walked
forward under solitary stars
above the rooftops of Santa Cruz.

Every step my skin prickled, my

Stubby fingers extended, for
This walker in nights place
Is in a land of no nights
And in its broken eye,
pictures of home fluttered within
my empty head torn together from light.
Together like kind strangers:
We watched the passage of
Creatures from the
Infinity of now, skip across
The streets behind us illuminating the pavement
Like diamonds, laughing like family.

Fallen Trees in December

Katie Lee McNeil
Fallen Trees in December
I sit on His hand crafted stool,
Once again, beginning anew,
Answers I long ago believed, came forth
This very afternoon.
Simple, that note was,
It rang so calm, before the eve,
Upturn, my lips grew as I knew
You were still lifting-for me- the peace that You weave.

Letters to Modern Corsair:

Gregory Poblete,
I really like your new part of the
magazine. Between my Netflix and
Redbox there are too many choices
to make and thats why a reviewer is
someone I need. I am a big fan of Arrested Development, and freaked out
hardcore when season four came out,
so I was surprised Id never heard
of Crystal Fairy. But Ill differently
watch it now. As for the other movie
you did, it was grouse and kind of
dopy, but my boyfriend liked it.
I am just wondering, will you do
any new releases in the future? Im
not sure about this Tom Cruise die
and die and die movie. I think if you
did premier events that would be
cool. You live in California right?
Thats where the big movies all get
red carpet affairs.
Any who, thanks a lot for the great
new content. I hope to see a lot more
funny junk.
- Lynda Smick
________________________
Dear Lynda,

First of all, I want to say thank
you very much reading my reviews.
Im glad I could be a provider of
funny junk for you. That really
means a lot.

As for your question, yes, I
would love to start heading to the

movies to watch new releases and

review them. However, the only
reason that I choose to review Netflix
or Redbox movies is because accessibility. Going to the movies is simple if you dont mind paying $12 or
however much it is to watch a movie,
but I like watching movies at home
because I can take my time to watch
the movie, watch it multiple times,
as well as take tons of notes while
watching it. Another reason I like
watching movies at home is because
it is easier to find a movie that relates
to the theme of the issue. If I go to
the movies and try to watch a movie
in hopes that it scratches the surface
of the issues theme, then I am kind
of taking a stab in the dark...

With all those excuses aside, I
will definitely try to go to the movies more often because it is actually
fun being one of the first people who
watch a movie in theaters. As for
these red carpet events, that would
be amazing. I have no idea how this
can happen, but if The Modern Corsair can get their favorite movie reviewer to a red carpet event, I would
be eternally grateful.
-Gregory Poblete

CREDITS
The Modern Corsair for June 2014
Issue Number 9
This issue was: Religion.
Now believe in yourself. Never stop. Otherwise you might just will yourself out of existence.
The next issue will be: Time.
People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint - its more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly... time-y wimey... stuff.
Check out our subreddit at www.reddit.com/r/themoderncorsair
Send all entries, comments, or suggestions to
themoderncorsair@gmail.com. Wed be happy to hear from our readers.
Special thanks to:
The Stay Gallery
And the biggest thanks of all to:
You.
Not you as the reader of this magazine, specifically you as the human
reading this text in this moment. Keep on reading, beautiful person.