Having Girlfriends/Boyfriends

OR ?

Decide for yourself……

1
As Salaam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh brothers and sisters !

I'm very incompetent to take up the task of clarifying Islamic issues or to advise people on the same. But this
is my humble attempt at "Islah" to gain Allah's pleasure, which I would do by sharing my experiences and
sharing whatever little I’ve learnt pertaining to the topic "Girlfriend-Boyfriend relationships" in Islam.

I'm not a writer, nor do I want to be one. It’s so much easier to read & listen than to write & speak. Hence
this required a lot of patience (which is lacking in me a bit ;->). But Allah helped me in that and all praise and
thanks are due to Him. Anything good that you can find in this, is due to Allah’s grace, and any error or wrong
that you may find in this is due to my ignorance. It is very long, I know, but I couldn't edit any part of it, so
please check this one out fully with patience. Remember having finished "The Da Vinci Code" in just a week
and "Harry Potter" in just 3 days? This is not even one-third of those books. Not as entertaining though, helpful
Insha-Allah.

For the younger brothers & sisters, this is a humble advice from your brother in Islam, and from the elders I
call in for comments and suggestions.

Allah Knows Best.

Jazakallahi Khairun.

Please Note: Islam teaches and commands love to exist amongst all human beings, unparalleled by any
other religion. Therefore, please do not assume this piece to be anti-love or something.. Just like, a
computer can be used in both, right and wrong ways, LOVE, one of the greatest bounties of Allah can also be
enjoyed by us in the right and the wrong way.. Especially the love between a couple. Here, we are looking
critically at the infatuation, lust and the wrong way of love between a couple, especially the teens, and not
love itself.

[I've changed the names of the persons (not of the scholars) to maintain confidentiality. I also have
changed in some places the exact descriptions of events pertaining to me, like places or dialogues or
happenings to not give enough information to clearly identify the people involved (myself included) and
also to suit the context. However, the opinions and views, and references are genuine]

The Quranic verses are in blue font, hadeeth in maroon, & scholars' sayings in green]
I’ve tried to change the shorthand to full words, but you may still find some. I regret that.

You may reproduce part or whole of this small book without prior permission but only for the benefit of fellow
Muslims or for Islam and not otherwise.
You can contact me for anything concerning this project, maybe suggestions or comments, etc on these
emails: sdg@k.st or sklavedesgottes@yahoo.com . Remember it as "Sklave Des Gottes" meaning "Slave of God"
in German. I have a specific reason for choosing this pen-name, so don’t make any presumptions about my
aqeedah 
I plan to make more projects in future targeted at non-muslims as well, InshaAllah. Just send me your email
id if you want an update regarding it.
Jazakallahi Khairun to all those who helped me in this. May Allah reward you suitably and let the pure
objective of this work be attained. Aameen

2
Before we begin I would like to slightly deviate from the topic so as to make a special mention about “Islam
and Terrorism” in the wake of the current on-goings.
There are two things that sell like hot cakes in the media: 1) Sex and 2) Defamation of Islam and the Muslims.
The most commonly used weapon by the media to move people away from Islam is, linking it with terrorism.
We Muslims need to learn how to turn the tables. I strongly recommend you to watch the video- “Is terrorism
a Muslim monopoly?” by Dr Zakir Naik.
The following is a short combat kit to fight the allegations that ‘Islam is a religion advocating terrorism’.

. ".whosoever killeth a human being., it shall be as if he had killed all mankind, and whoso saveth the life
of one, it shall be as if he had saved the life of all mankind." [Quran, 5:32]

There is no compulsion in religion. True guidance has become clearly distinct from error. (Qur'an, 2:256)
So remind them! You are only a reminder. You are not in control of them. (Qur'an, 88:21-22)

If your Lord had willed, all the people on the earth would have believed. Do you think you can force
people to be believers? (Qur'an, 10:99)

Allah commands justice and doing good and giving to relatives. And He forbids indecency and doing wrong
and tyranny. He warns you so that hopefully you will pay heed. (Qur'an, 16:90)

Eat and drink of Allah's provision and do not go about the earth corrupting it. (Qur'an, 2:60)

“.Do not follow your own desires and deviate from the truth. If you twist or turn away, Allah is aware of
what you do.” (Qur'an, 4:135)

O You who believe! Show integrity for the sake of Allah, bearing witness with justice. Do not let hatred
for a people incite you into not being just. Be just. That is closer to faith. Heed Allah (alone). Allah is
aware of what you do. (Qur'an, 5:8)

"A good action and a bad action are not the same. Repel the bad with something better and, if there is
enmity between you and someone else, he will be like a bosom friend." (Qur'an, 41:34)

"those who give in times of both ease and hardship, those who control their rage and pardon other people
– Allah loves the good-doers" (Qur'an, 3:134)

Permission to fight is given to those who are fought against because they have been wronged – truly God
has the power to come to their support – those who were expelled from their homes without any right,
merely for saying, "Our Lord is Allah"… (Qur'an, 22:39-40)

"Go to war in adherence to the religion of Allah. Never touch the elderly, women or children. Always
improve their situation and be kind to them. Allah loves those who are sincere."

"Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him. Be good to your parents and relatives and to
orphans and the very poor, and to neighbors who are related to you and neighbors who are not related to
you, and to companions and travelers and your slaves. Allah does not love anyone vain or boastful."
(Qur'an, 4:36)

Go to Pharaoh; he has overstepped the bounds. But speak to him with gentle words so that hopefully he
will pay heed or show some fear. (Qur'an, 20:43-44)

Ibn Umar (ra) said, "One of the situations from which there is no escape for the one who falls into it is the
shedding of blood for no legitimate reason". (Sahih al-Bukhaari)
Suicide is a sin for which the punishment is nothing lesser than hell. (to refute suicide bombing)
"Do not kill yourselves." (Qur'an, 4:29)

Indeed, whoever (intentionally) kills himself, then certainly he will be punished in the Fire of Hell,
wherein he shall dwell forever [Bukhari (5778) and Muslim (109 and 110)]

3
 NO COPYRIGHTS !
Copies of this book may be freely distributed in electronic or written form.

Second Edition February 2008

Bangalore, India

4
 CONTENTS
Chapter No. Page No.
1. INITIAL COLLEGE DAYS- My side----------------------------------------------------------- 08
TRUE LOVE---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 11
RULING ON FRIENDSHIP------------------------------------------------------------- 13

2. CAUSES OF TEMPTATION-------------------------------------------------------------------- 15
MUSIC----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 15
MOVIES--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 17
NOVELS AND TV---------------------------------------------------------------------- 18
PEERS- CHATTING-------------------------------------------------------------------- 20

3. REASONS FOR MAKING A GF/BF------------------------------------------------------------ 24

IT’S COOL------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 24
COMPETITION------------------------------------------------------------------------- 26
PEER PRESSURE----------------------------------------------------------------------- 27
NEED FOR LOVE---------------------------------------------------------------------- 29
BOREDOM------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 31
WHY GIVE BOREDOM A CHANCE? ---------------------------------------- 32
HALAL ENJOYMENTS------------------------------------------------------- 32
EXTRA IBADAH-------------------------------------------------------------- 32
DA'WAH----------------------------------------------------------------------- 33
ISLAH------------------------------------------------------------------------- 36

4. QUESTIONS------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 39
Changed faces ----------------------------------------------------------------------- 39

5. "ROMANTICISM- A WEAPON OF SATAN"- HARUN YAHYA------------------------------- 48

LEGITMATE AND ILLEGITIMATE LOVE-------------------------------------------- 48
"YO MATE! THIS IS THE 21st CENTURY- RELIGION IS OUTDATED"---------- 50
"NOONE CARES FOR ME, I'M THE MOST DEPRESSED, WHY HAVE I SO -
MANY SORROWS? SOB!" ------------------------------------------------- 52
PHYSICAL ILLS CAUSED BY ROMANTICISM------------------------------------------------ 56

6. "I LOVE HER,” SAID THE PROPHET (S.A.W) --------------------------------------------- 58

"WAS THE PROPHET ROMANTIC?"- MD. WALEED BASOUNI

7. COLLAPSE OF THE WEST-------------------------------------------------------------------- 63

EDUCATIONAL------------------------------------------------------------------------ 64
ECONOMIC----------------------------------------------------------------------------- 65
SPIRITUAL----------------------------------------------------------------------------- 67
MORAL--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 69
THE GOLDEN AGE-------------------------------------------------------------------- 70

8. HELL--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 72

9. PARADISE--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 78

10. WILLPOWER----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 89
PARADIGM SHIFT----------------------------------------------------------------------------- 91
UNDERSTANDING THE CONCEPT OF REPENTANCE------------------------------------ 92
EEMAAN IS OUR TREASURE (LESSONS FROM THE LIFE OF MUSAB (RAA))--------- 95
IN A NUTSHELL (Poem) --------------------------------------------------------------------- 97
DUAS------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 100

5
INTRODUCTION
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Praise be to Allah. We praise Him and seek His help and forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allah from the evil
of our own selves and from our evil deeds. Whomsoever Allah guides cannot be led astray, and whomsoever
Allah leaves astray cannot be guided. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah Alone, with no partner or
associate, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

"So you don’t believe in God?" I asked Thejus, the brightest chap in our class, while in my Eighth Grade in St.
John's School. This was following a challenge he posed to our Physics Sir, "Sir, how can you prove that there is
God?” Our Physics sir was least interested in answering questions pertaining to his own subject leave alone
such questions. He didn’t answer him.
"Well, I'm not sure. I think science has an answer to all,” said Thejus to me. So he was an "agnostic". We
didn’t know that word that time. :-) I asked him, " How do u think everything around us and everything that
we cannot see now but still exists, like the Billions of galaxies, were created?" Now that was an innocent
question, not a sarcastic one. "Maybe by some chemical reaction." "Hmmm. How do you think that chemical
reaction was possible?" "Well, I dunno, when I grow up & become a scientist I’ll answer you." I sort of believed
him then. He made me think. He was one person who really gave exercise to my otherwise idle brain cells :-)

Both he and me forgot about this discussion soon, but this thought crossed my mind once again four years
later. I would wonder as to why Abba would pester me so much to join him to the Masjid (It would save me
the trouble of hiding in the bathroom). I wondered why Allah would want us to stay hungry everyday for a
month if his love towards us was 70 times that of a mother's towards her child. I came across many Christians
who urged me to join them to churches and I did. I visited churches, and "prayed" to Jesus(pbuh). At a time
when I was in deep depression, I confided my sorrows to a Christian man. He sympathized with me and asked
me if I would convert to Christianity. A depressed me, agreed. His face lit up with joy & he asked me if I
would join him to church the next day. I agreed to that too, though I didn’t go. I'm not pulling a fast one here;
Allah is witness to what I’m saying.

I kept wondering, were my dad, mom, sisters, all the relatives and the 1.4 billion people wrong? Was this man
correct? Before I could get an answer to any, I kept away from that man and never saw him again. Then
started my research. Or rather, that was when Allah chose to guide a lost lamb and made his qualities of
mercy and graciousness manifest to me. I went back to the basics & started asking questions and finding
answers myself through my independent research, using Science and Logic, and Practicability for some. The
miracles (the pics & vids) were found by me later on, just strengthening my belief & faith but they didn’t play
a big part in my belief. Some of the important questions were, (In the same order) "Does God Exist?", "Is there
one God or many?", "Why did he create me and everything around me?", "How should I know If I'm following
the right path? Just because I was born a Muslim doesn’t mean Islam is right. Christianity could be right,
Hinduism, Judaism, anything could be right. How should I know which is right? Can more than one faith be
right?”, "What does Allah expect of me?", "What If I refuse to obey His commands?", etc. etc. etc. Now I'm not
gonna baby u here as to how I found the answers to these. I’ll tell ya if you wanna know, InshaAllah.

Francis Beckon - "A little knowledge of Science makes you an atheist but an in depth knowledge of
Science makes u a true believer of God."

"Do they not consider the Quran with care, if it had been from anyone other than God, it would contain
many discrepancies." (Quran 4:82)

My intention of telling you all this was that, I'm not following a blind faith. If you are following Islam, I
congratulate you bcoz you've found the truth, or, you were on the truth. I take full responsibility of this. You
can take my word for it. "I bear witness that there is no God but Allah and Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) is
his messenger". Even if the whole world goes against this belief, I'm gonna stick to this Insha Allah.

Now that we know that our job is to follow the rules of Islam perfectly, lets discuss the topic in concern

"Love is Beautiful, Wonderful and Amazing. You feel it’s the best thing in the world. Until it happens to
your daughter.!! " - Shakespeare.
6
Rabbani, a very pious Muslim tells me, "He's hopeless bro; Irreparable", referring to his younger brother
considering the extreme that he had gone to. Though Rabbani tried hard to change his younger brother, his
younger bro didn’t budge. "He does all sorts of wrong things that a guy of his age can do. Just name it and he
does that. I have no hopes that he’ll change". To prove Rabbani’s thinking wrong, I present my own life's
instances to you. I wont present any extreme ones but just a few instances that are required for you to know.
Read and decide for yourself if Rabbani was right in his hopes about his brother. Well, before that lemme just
tell you, keeping mine and Rabbani’s brother's case aside, there are cases of people known to me who were
ten times the extremes of Rabbani’s bro and me, but who now are ten times more pious than us,
Alhamdulillah!! But lemme stick to the lesser extreme ones like mine, because I feel you can relate it better
to your own present or past lives than the totally extreme ones.

7
Chapter-1

INITIAL COLLEGE DAYS

We young Muslims, during college years take a vacation from religion because we see religion regulating our
lifestyles. We have a new freedom and this freedom includes freedom from God because without God
"everything becomes possible in our desires and behavior".
We are under peer pressure and "beer pressure". Thus we've no time for God whatsoever at least in the first
year of campus life.

When I entered college first after school, I'd everything in ma mind but studies. Did everything that a
bangalorean of my age would do- bunking classes, making cafes our classrooms & vice versa. Rishab & me
formed a group soon with equal no. of guyz & galz (we believe in equality you see :-)). MGs & the Brigades
were where we needed to go to make our future bright!! How would we reach there? In Rishab's car with
music being played at a volume at which even the deaf could hear & Pritz holding SJ's scarf outta the window
& we all scream at the top of our voice, being the center of attraction. Anybody could say this was a group
new to college. I still have some snaps of those crazy dayz. I would use the "F"s & "B"s in every sentence I
spoke. I was the first in ma group to tattoo my ears!! Was the first to talk to girlz outside our group &
introduce 'em to the "shy" guyz of my group. "tu toh hamara guru hai pa"- Rishab to me. I was a guru, in
teaching these guyz how to make new friends in galz, putting my experience of 6 schools to "good" use. I was
far from being a guru in preaching the truth; the truth that I’d been blessed with. The truth, Islam. "Wild!!" I
hear some say that, & I sense some thinking "hmm, that’s quite normal". Normal? Yes maybe, for a bunch of
hooligans, or rather, Western culture slaves, but for a Muslim?

Two years later, I dunno what good I’d done, for Allah chose to guide me. I discovered my religion,
Alhamdulillah. Not fully though (I talked bout my research & all, above? yes, that was now). I just discarded
all the stupid and dirty stuff that I used to do & followed the basic principles of Islam like establishing 5 times

8
prayer & all that. But I still had a long, long way to go (I Still have a long way).

I presumed that, it’s wrong to have Girlfriends just for the heck of it, but if u luv her, then it’s fine. I used to
justify it by adding the notion of "true love" to the relation. U see, it’s the so-called age of "love". Even sex is
called "making love". Whether u do it with a slut or with your wife doesn’t matter, u must call it "making
love". The hormones do the job & we blame it on our poor heart. It never occurred to me that I could b in a
relation, which was haraam. Satan always prevented me from thinking so, saying, "look buddy (you see, he
acts as your friend, your helper, & on the day of judgment- Vanish!) you guyz luv each other ‘truly’, u take it
seriously, it’s all ‘pure’, neither one cheats the other, & moreover you stick to your limits & God himself
teaches all to ‘love’, so why would Islam have a problem with such a relation??"
“hmmm”, I thought. “Makes sense”. little realizing who this guy who’s telling me all this, was. I called it my
conscience, but u all know who he was, or who she was (why cant Satan be female? Lol.)

Once while chatting with my ex, I see that her palms were both red. On asking she says it was by mixing that
kumkum or something. It was their festival the previous day. She starts to explain to me about how it went.
How the pooja & stuff was carried on, etc. she tells me about her dad's hosting the procession in the temple,
her sis's religious dance (or satanic dance) in the temple & how she helped her & stuff. I feel like ma heart's
being wrung. While I listen to all this I wonder, oh god!! What’s this! How can I luv this girl who's takin pride
in doing Shirk! [This is not to mean we can have such a relationship with a Muslim]. I had read in many Islamic
forums about the invalidity of such relationships, but it dawned to me only now. I went back home & wept
internally. Yes, I would perform Salah regularly, but hardly remembered Allah in them. You see, we
remember Him only when we think we need Him, whereas we actually need Him every second of our life. I
called on my lord for help. I asked Him to prevent me from any wrong (as though I didn’t know I was doing a
big wrong), to guide me aright before it’s too late. Whether my weeping was real or artificial, I dunno. But
what I know is, irrespective of it, Allah did grant my request. He guided me here too. Allahu Akbar.

I started understanding the meaning of Islam. It is, submitting yourself to the will of Allah &, neither to the
will of your VAIN desires nor to the temptations of Satan. If we don’t follow the commandments of Allah
correctly, then the whole purpose of creation of mankind becomes void. I realized that now. Well, better late
than never.
Quitting this relation was much harder for me than quitting Music & Movies. Well, that’s sort of obvious. She's
not non-living. She's a human with a heart. How could I end a 2.5 yr relation? How am I gonna convince her?
More than that, how am I gonna convince maself that I needed to stay without her? What with Satan & the
movies, music & your peers fantasizing this so-called true love. Quitting movies & music & all the haraam
stuff on TV wasn't half as difficult as this.

"In Islam, there is no such thing as a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. You are either married or you are
not."
- Amatullah Islam

Listen brothers and sisters, nobody can prevent us from hell and make us enter paradise but Allah. So we
must be loving him more than anyone else. She can’t bring paradise to me. in fact, I’ll just take myself to
hell. I had to end this relationship someway. This thought was playing on my mind for sometime but now I
finally decided to. But again, it would be very mean on ma part to end it in a sudden, ruthless manner. So I
decided to turn this into a friendship, then hi-bye, then and a complete full stop. I dunno if I was right in my
manner. I told her that I seek a break-off, but she never responded to it. I changed my nature towards her
and she would crib about it, but stopped the cribbing over a period of time. She must be thinking that I’ve
reverted to my past & thus sought a change in the girl, bcoz she grew hostile. There was no better way that I
could explain to her. I tried doing Da'wah to her, every possible way but she only thought that it was an
intelligent way of proving other faiths wrong & one's faith true. Well, that helped in a way. That spelled the
END. But I'd made clear to her that she could ask me for any sort of help & I would help her InshaAllah. She
agreed. Well, it was actually a more difficult and painful process than it seems. But, am on my way. Hope
that Allah will forgive me & guide me on the right path. Aameen. Whether Allah has forgiven me or not, the
bottom line is, I need to do what every person on earth needs to be doing- submitting oneself to the will of
Allah, that is how we can have a peaceful & happy life & gain success, both, in this world and in the
hereafter.

Some guys tell me that they wanna quit the sins they are in but the circumstances don’t let them to. What a
lame reason to continue committing sins. We ourselves find it lame, leave alone Allah. So Guys, note: when
9
we try to leave something that is wrong, Satan will attack u from all sides preventing u from leaving that
wrong.

“ Satan asked the Lord to give him respite (keep him alive) until the Day of Resurrection.
The Lord told him, "We will grant you this respite."
Satan declared: "Since You let me deviate, now I will lie in ambush for mankind on Your Right Way.
and come upon them from the front and from the rear, from their right and from their left. Then, You shall
find most of them ungrateful.”
[Allah] said, "Get out of Paradise, reproached and expelled. Whoever follows you among them I will
surely fill Hell with you, all together.” “ [7:14-17]

One of his ways is this: we have these girls supporting girls, like, her friends, who call me up me & say. "How
mean u r, how heartless, blah, blah…." & the girl who's saying this, herself has changed 3 guys in one year &
mind u, "changed" & not left them for the sake of Islam o something. In fact, even Muslim sistas come-up to
me & say I’m unfair. Yea, it’s like I want to leave a sin & these people say, no, it’s not fair to leave a sin
which you’ve been doing for a long time. Lol! Me and Ma gal ourselves came to an understanding and came to
a conclusion somehow, then why let these people poke their noses. Trust me, it’s never cool to do haraam.
You can never gain happiness & be in peace in doing something unislamic. If you’re telling me that u r happy
doing that, then I'm sorry you’re just cheating yourself. While in the relation, u see nothing else but your luv
in everything. Your academic scores drop, u lose concentration in everything, even in your Salah. Insecurity,
restlessness creeps in. trust is a foregone thing. Frequent quarrels, fights that put both in depression. Your
focus on career is lost. You empty your dad's pockets to fill her tummy with junk. You ignore your family &
your dear ones who have more rights on u. Earlier, when I used to call her & talk for bout 30 mins, I wouldn’t
care bout my balance (as though I recharge with my money & not dad's). & when I call dad for just 3 mins I
start realizing that I’ve called from my cell & my bal is reducing & I ask my dad to call me back or keep.
Earlier, I used to get some goodies for ma sisters on way back home, now all that money goes to her & my
sisters don deserve even a small toffee. You don eat well, u don sleep well, u don study well. & Allah- huh!
he's someone that u need to go to only whenever u r in trouble, not otherwise. When your parents question
your state, u start shouting and back-answering. So those girls were quick to notice my being unfair to my gal,
but where were they when I was being unfair to my mom, my dad, my sisters, my career, myself, & most
importantly- Islam. One of those gals say, "that’s your prob, u didn’t know how to strike a balance". " oh yea??
then u yourself might know how to strike balance rite, then y did u change 3 BFs (boy-frens) in just a year?!
And the guy whom you like must be someone who knows to strike a "balance" rite, then why did he leave u in
just 2 months? Moreover, I'm leaving her for Allah's sake but your guy left u for another girl's sake. I think u
should have given him balance-striking lessons." She’s no answer. I didn’t intend to hurt her, but there was no
other way I could stop them from entering my territory.
The prob is not, striking a balance; the prob is, the invalidity of such a relationship. When you must not be in
such a relationship at all, then why break your head learning to “strike a balance”?

Look people, lemme put this straight. Islam is not for you and me to compose. Allah sets the rules & we've
got to carry it out the way our prophet (peace be upon him) carried it out. You think you're smarter than
Allah, the Creator? When he sets rules, that is the best that can be set for mankind. There's no questioning its
practicability. But even when u question, Islam doesn’t lose, it only wins if u apply proper logic. When we are
sick, even sweet things seem bitter. Similarly, when we r spiritually & morally sick, the good of Islam seems
bad. On the Day of Judgment we will understand InshaAllah why Allah made such-and-such rules, even if we
don’t now.

"Verily in the Messenger of Allah ye have a good example." (Quran, 33:21)

Say: "Obey Allah and His Messenger…” (Quran, 3:32)

It is the Prophet (PBUH) that we need to emulate in every walk of our life. We cannot invent our own opinions
against the Prophet’s (PBUH).

Allah (swt) tells us that the keeper of Hell will ask the kuffaar as they are approaching Hell:
"Did there not come to you your messengers with clear signs?" (40:50)
The response will be that they deserved Hell because they disbelieved in the Messengers and their Message:
"They will say, "Yes indeed; a Warner did come to us, but we rejected him." (67:9)

Abu Hurairah (r.a.a) narrated that Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) said that among the seven persons whom
10
Allah will shade in His Shade on the Day (of Judgment) when there is no shade except His Shade, is a man
who is tempted by a beautiful woman and refuses to respond for fear of Allah. [Bukhari and Muslim].

Yet few other Muslim sistas ask me, "Was she a Muslim?” You might have got to know y they ask me this- So
that I marry her. Well, unfortunately she's not a Muslim. I tried my best in doing real hard da'wah but u c,
giving Hidaayah is only In Allah's hands. We only do our job of conveying with hikmah.
Then they ask, "Why cant you marry her first and then convince her to revert?" I did think bout that, but if
that was allowed in Islam, you think I would've done otherwise?

"And do not marry unbelieving (literally, polytheist) women until they believe. A slave woman who
believes is better than a [free] unbelieving woman, even though she allures you. Nor marry [your girls] to
unbelievers until they believer; a male slave who believes is better than a [free] unbeliever, even though
he allures you. Those [unbelievers] do [but] beckon you to the Fire, but Allah invites by His Grace to the
Garden [of Bliss] and forgiveness, and makes His Signs clear to mankind that they may receive
admonition" (2:221)

“… Wed them with the permission of their own folk and give them their mahr (bridal money given by
the husband to the wife at the time of marriage) according to what is reasonable; they should be chaste,
not lustful, nor taking paramours (boyfriends)…” [al-Nisaa’ 4:25]

If your relationship was outta ignorance, then marry each other if both of u r Muslims, but keep away from
each other till marriage- That’s the rulings given by the Scholars of Hadeeth and Quran.

One more point to be noted here is, If you expect your spouse to be pure and someone who’s not had any
illicit relationship before, you’ve got to be one too. Allah is the most Just and ensures fairness in everything.
If you are a fornicator, you only deserve a spouse who’s also a fornicator, unless you sincerely repent and
seek forgiveness with Allah, and mend your ways. The verse goes thus:

‘Let no man guilty of adultery or fornication marry any but a woman similarly guilty, or an Unbeliever;
nor let any but such a man or an Unbeliever marry such a woman; to the Believers such a thing is
forbidden’ [al-Noor 24:3 - Yusuf ‘Ali’s translation]

"TRUE LOVE"

"English is a beautiful language. From Hallmark to Archie’s, they all make millions out of this language by
putting the same words like “I love you” in millions of different ways in their cards in an effort to produce
emotions in their printing factories"- Arindham Chaudhari

This is for all those younger guyz to whom I explain, & they come to me & say, but I love her "truly" bro,
"purely" bro, this "ly" & that "ly"- Why u telling all this to me? Be ready with your answers to Allah on judgment
day. Do u think he’ll accept your justification?

We must realize that self-justifying an action will not make it halal and doesn’t remove the inevitable
reality of standing in front of Allah (swt) on the Day of Judgment, with nothing except our deeds. It is the
Western concept of freedom and individualism that breeds the mentality of pure greed and selfishness where
people even steal and backstab their own families to achieve some material pleasure or benefit. Some of the
most common types of self-justifications that people hold are the following:

‘’At least I’m better than others'’ … ‘’I will change in the future'’ … ‘’I am not ready for it yet, it’s too
difficult to change'’ … ‘’As long as I am pure inside, Allah will forgive me'’
11
"It is not becoming to a believer, whether man or woman, when a matter has been decided by Allah and
by His Apostle, to have any option. If anyone disobeys Allah and His Apostle he is on a clearly wrong
path." (Quran 33:36).

A very good example of true love, patience and responsibility can be seen in the penguins. I learnt it from the
documentary, "The march of the penguins" [English version].

I ask the guyz who claim to have "pure love" towards their girlfriends, what do you mean by “pure”? They say,
it’s independent of lust. They don’t have any bad intentions in their love. Well, by bad intentions I
understand, getting physical. Now, whether you get physical or not, It still is not permitted if you wanna be a
Muslim. But even then, I ask, tell me, if it requires you to love her throughout your life without even touching
her, literally touching, u ready?' Mind you, your whole life you’ve to live that way. Some say in haste- "yes".
While some accept that they would want to touch and feel and do more. But they substantiate saying, they're
just "showing love". I ask, 'Why do you have to? When u both believe that you love each other, then why show
love physically? Your love is "pure" right?'

They also claim that love is blind. So when love is blind, why don't we see popular/influential/handsome/
intelligent guys falling for ugly, nerdy or dumb girls? Similarly, why don't we find influential/pretty/wise girls
falling for "nerds", retarded or "loser" guys?? Be true to yourself. Few say, "hey I do find". How much of a lie is
that, I dunno, but even if it’s true, one of a thousand case. So isn’t this 0.001 % probability enough to prove
love isn’t blind?? Lets cut the crap.

Following is part of an article from Howstuffworks.com:

“If you've ever been in love, you've probably at least considered classifying the feeling as an addiction. And
guess what: You were right. As it turns out, scientists are discovering that the same chemical process that
takes place with addiction takes place when we fall in love.

Love is a chemical state of mind that's part of our genes and influenced by our upbringing. We are wired for
romance in part because we are supposed to be loving parents who care diligently for our helpless babies.”

So, love as we see it here is an addiction. Just like how you fight to quit fagging, you need fight here too.

This true love or whatever you may call it, cannot be, or rater, should not be enjoyed before marriage.
Atleast if you’re a practicing Muslim. The fact is that, we all want to say, "I love you" to someone who’ll
respond similarly. And this someone should be good by the worldly standards. We all want to exchange
romantic messages with this someone; We all want to receive and show "special" care to this someone, We
want do everything that the actors do in the movies, everything that which we are permitted to do only with
our spouse. [More in the 5th chapter]

Why not do the same to your spouse? Why not call your wife your GF or your hubby your BF, as the case
maybe? No, that’s not the way the actors do it, right. The hero-heroine are seldom married. The actors are
our prophets (vanauzbillah) and thus we need to follow them and be influenced by their lifestyles.
Show the same kind of love and care to your wife and I’ll accept that it is "pure" or "true" or whatever you call
it. But no, marriage is something "Ugh!” Why? Because whether you're good to your wife or bad she’ll still be
there. But a girlfriend can anytime call it quits so you're very careful in handling her, showing her the best
love that you can. And moreover, in marriage you can't change your wife that easily right. There are lotza
complications. In other words, there is not much "flexibility". But in a gf-bf relationship, there is full
flexibility- you can change your girlfriend-boyfriend without much hassles.
[More in the 6th Chapter]

And then we’ll have guys and galz who shamelessly say, "Who cares for love, we just wanna have some fun,
man. One life, live to the max". Exactly!!! One life is what we have on this world. But the life of this world is
just a tiny drop from the ocean, while the next, never-ending, eternal life is the water of all the oceans &
seas. Still, not a good enough simile. Which one do you want? Live according to Allah's will in this very, very,
very small life, and you're gonna get the best in the next; something you’ll never have thought about. And live
this life according to your will, again, you're gonna get the best in the next- but in torture; something you’ll
12
never have thought about.

Just one life fellas, live to the max- by earning as many rewards as possible. You give up something for Allah's
sake, Allah will compensate you with something better in both the worlds.

Quran 11-17 -

Say: The angel of death, who hath charge concerning you, will gather you, and afterward unto your Lord
ye will be returned.

Couldst thou but see when the guilty hang their heads before their Lord, (and say): Our Lord! We have
now seen and heard, so send us back; we will do right, now we are sure.

And if We had so willed, We could have given every soul its guidance, but the word from Me concerning
evildoers took effect: that I will fill hell with the jinn and mankind together.

So taste (the evil of your deeds). For as much as ye forgot the meeting of this your day, lo! We forget
you. Taste the doom of immortality because of what ye used to do.

Only those believe in Our revelations who, when they are reminded of them, fall down prostrate and
hymn the praise of their Lord, and they are not scornful, (do sajda)

Who forsake their beds to cry unto their Lord in fear and hope, and spend of what we have bestowed on
them.

No soul knoweth what is kept hid for them of joy, as a reward for what they used to do.

HOW ABOUT MERE FRIENDSHIP?

Check out this explanation from understanding-islam.org :

Question:

Is it allowed for men in an Islamic society to have girl friends? Please make a distinction between co-workers
and co-students who men meet on a daily basis in their workplace and educational institutions and other
girls they meet on chats and other places.

Thanks
Salman Shoaib
Pakistan
Answer:

From your question I ascertained that you are discussing platonic relationships between men and women.
However, if I am mistaken and you are in fact asking about the romantic/dating aspect of
girlfriend/boyfriend then I would have to say that it is absolutely prohibited in Islam for such a relationship
to exist. If, on the other hand, I have understood your query correctly then I can proceed to try to answer
your question effectively.

I will make a clear distinction between co-workers and school peers in that they fall into the category of
acquaintances. An acquaintance is basically someone you know or know of. It’s a "lesser" relationship in that
it’s more like a drive-by relationship. You exchange pleasantries and have a little small talk all within the
confines of the environment that introduced the two (or more) of you to one another. However the
relationships you a referring to are of a completely different level.

Relationships are a bond and a personal, interwoven familiarity with others. They consist of intimate (not

13
excluding but not necessarily sexual) elements not privy to others. In other words, very personal
information may be shared and confided within a circle of friends but not to those outside this "circle". In
these types of relationships, an environment of coziness begins to develop. Friendships create a sense of
comfort permitting persons to let go of themselves. This relaxed state allows persons in the relationship to
drop their guard and certain behaviors become accepted which previously may have not. Another potential
feature is that the original environment, which allowed for the parties to meet may no longer be of great
significance as was before since that boundary is crossed when the parties meet one another at other places.
If the relationship/friendship consists of a man and woman there may be a great potential for affection to
grow. This "affection" comes in various forms, including but not limited to platonic, loving, lustful etc.

Islam prescribes a socio-moral standard in which men and women are responsible for their intentions and
actions. It is clear from Islamic doctrine that men and women must socialize with modest behavior, attitude
and spirit. One of the key points is the avoidance of any licentious conduct. The mere hint of an impure
glance or thought is admonished by a gentle suggestion of expelling the idea or restraining the eyes and
maintaining God's presence within ones heart and mind.

Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for
greater purity for them: And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing
women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty. (Al-Noor 24: 30 - 31)

If the above information is taken into consideration it should be clear that platonic relationships between
men and women should be avoided. A friendship (man/woman) consists of sharing a lot more of ones self
than is recommended by Islam. The potential for something unwise to occur in such relationships is great.
The rule should be understood in the general sense and not the exception. Chatting, in my opinion, is no
different since it may produce similar results as giving a lot more of ones self than is advised. Although it's
slightly more complicated to answer, the fact is that the mere intrigue of getting to know the person behind
the veil of chat rooms can lead down that hazardous road.

Finally, I would say that in any form of relationship a sense of modesty and sincerity should be adhered to. In
terms of mere acquaintances (of any type) at work, school, and chat (entertainment, religious, education,
fishing, etc.) rooms or otherwise it should remain within the confines of the environment in which this
relationship began. In terms of platonic relationships between men and women then it should be clear that
they should be avoided since they tend to become more intimate with time (which is the natural progression
of a friendship). My personal experience has been that men and women have relationships with one another
for a vast number of reasons from emotional to sexual and far beyond what we can delve into here. Suffice
to say that this question falls under the category of "Can men and women be friends," something which is
beyond the scope of this response. If the relationship exceeds the limits prescribed by the Islamic Law and
you feel that it is encroaching upon that "fine line" then it would be best to go with your instinct. Either put
the brakes on or cut the relationship off.

I hope I have clarified the issue

God knows best

Ronnie Hassan

And Fiancé`?

Even a fiancé isn't really a "fiancé" in the Western sense, that you can talk, meet, have fun with etc etc. I’ve
read before that Islam does not technically recognize the relationship of a fiancé, so until they are officially
married, they are still na-mehrams. But one is allowed to speak to them with the intent of marriage (and not
HS/college type "intent", i.e., "oh yeah baby sure we’ll get married--lets sleep first--oh this relationship isn’t
working out).

14
Chapter-2

CAUSES OF TEMPTATION
MOTIVES OF ENTERING INTO A BF/GF RELATIONSHIP:

[And We said:] “……….judge, then, between men with justice, and do not follow vain desire, lest it lead
thee astray from the path of God: verily, for those who go astray from the path of God there is suffering
severe in store for having forgotten the Day of Reckoning!” [38:26]

MUSIC

Plug in the earphones; shake your head, shake your hips, shake everything you can possibly shake & if
someone looks at you and grins, cry out "hey! I'm freakin' cool!" What you don't realize is that you actually are
a "freakin' fool". In the sheer madness bow to your rock star, shed your clothes & say "I'm hot!!" and Allah will
strike your name from the people of paradise and on Islam you’ll remain a "black spot!"

As though these so-called "Muslim" terrorists are not enough, these crazy and foolish teens join the party in
defaming Islam, jumping and dancing like buffoons making everyone think that Islam is nothing different from
other the other man-made religions.

"Music is my religion" cry out many youths. Hence the singers and composers become the prophets. Prophet
Enrique, prophet Elton, prophet Shaggy (one of the most pious :-> ), prophet Himesh, prophet AR Rahman,
prophet Burman, prophet Shaan, etc are few of the many prophets we've got. We also have female prophets-
prophet Shakira, prophet Spears, prophet Knowles, prophet Chauhan, and how can we forget the old but still
existing prophet- prophet Lata Mangeshkar!! Vanauzbillah.

So if you're following the religion "Music" then follow the footsteps of the prophets mentioned above. They'll
lead you to a "Hot! Hot!" place (As we'll see in chapter 8). Exciting right??!
[Please remember, the “Prophet” always accompanies with a prayer, ‘may peace be on him’. The word
cannot be used everywhere.. Here I used them sarcastically only to show the seriousness of the issue]

But if you're a "Nerd" following Islam (We’ll find out on judgment day who's the real nerd and who's the real
cool guy), then you must consider the following Hadeeth:

Narrated Abu 'Amir or Abu Malik Al-Ash'ari:

that he heard the Prophet saying, "From among my followers there will be some people who will consider
15
illegal sexual intercourse, the wearing of silk, the drinking of alcoholic drinks and the use of musical
instruments, as lawful. .Allah will destroy them during the night and will let the mountain fall on them,
and He will transform the rest of them into monkeys and pigs and they will remain so till the Day of
Resurrection." [Bukhari :: Book 7 :: Volume 69 :: Hadith 494 ]
Music comes even to the Masjid in the form of ring tones while doing Salah, destroying everyone's
concentration. Seldom do people realize the seriousness of this issue. Let us say for instance, you're listening
to your favorite track on your CDman at full volume and are hipping and hopping and bouncing like a fool,
totally lost in your world. At this point of time, god forbid, the Angel of Death comes and takes your life. Will
you be prepared to die in such a state? Death never gives any warning before coming. In just one year, four
guys of my age known to me, died. For death, age is no bar. 60 years, is just the average life span. We
mustn't take it for granted that we’ll live for a minimum of 60 years. If we've to cause any change in our lives,
the time is now.

A young boy asks me, "Why exactly do you think music is forbidden in Islam?" lemme stress on the phrase-
"do YOU think". So I'm presenting what “I” think the reason could be for Music to be disallowed in Islam. Allah
knows best. But before that lemme tell you, again, it shouldn't be that, only if we get a convincing answer
should we follow the hadith. We may not understand the exact reason because of our ignorance and lack of
wisdom But He, who is the "All knowing" infused the hadith in our Prophet's mind which cannot be dared
challenged by anyone whatsoever. To this, we find some so-called intelligent Muslims who challenge the
ruling with their silly reasons. I say, if you wanna get roasted, then go ahead.
Anyways, here is the opinion of many scholars with which I've blended mine:

First of all, Music is a kind of intoxication. When we listen to music, our inhibity center in the brain is slightly
disabled which can cause us to do wrong and make us insensitive towards good. Alcohol disables it to a great
extent but music disables it to a slight extent temporarily. I've experienced it myself. For example, my
favorite then was Enrique. When I would listen to his song, "Love to see you cry" with the lyrics set in a
pleasing tune mixed with the rocking background score, my mind would get lost in an imaginary world. I
would visualize my girl crying and I would find that cool!! I would hum its tune while walking to the masjid
even when the azan’s going on!! The song's taken me over so much that I'm not able to stop myself from
humming its tune even during azan! The song would play in ma mind even during Salah! While I listen to this
song, I find no sympathy to the beggars, brushing them aside rudely. When I would put on my headphones to
listen to Metallica or Strings at full volume & my sis would come & ask me for a favor, I would frown & get
angry. After I turn off this madness I realize how rude I was. Now you see the intoxicating effect of Music? It is
a great weapon of Satan to gain entry into our hearts.
Moreover, they have a way into your heart. Suppose you’ve heard a particular track several times. When you
hear the same track or just a part of it somewhere outside, say a mall or other place, you can recall the
remaining lyrics & tune & start singing along. Had you not heard that song before, it wouldn't distract you.

Second, It prevents us from remembering Allah. Instead it reminds us of our beloved all the time, or entices
us to make a "beloved". When we sing "tu hi meri shab hai" we remember our GF/BF and visualize doing
something romantic with her/him. And when those who haven't got a GF/BF, sing it, they obviously start
desiring to have one. Allah is forgotten altogether and Satan wins over us. We waste a hell lotta time listening
to music on our ipods rather than listen to Quranic recitation which is so much more pleasing to the ears, or
to Islamic lectures to enhance our wisdom, which might earn us great rewards.

Third, most of the songs are "love" centric. It makes us to believe that this so-called "love" is life. Our purpose
of creation becomes finding this illicit "love". And some others are "lust" centric. If you've heard the tracks of
K*** and S*******g, you’ll know what I mean. So these songs direct us in finding a "chick" and our purpose in life
here becomes "gettng laid". Some others like E****m teach us where all we can use that "F" and new such
words. We need to ape them as they are our "prophets" leading us to a "hot!!" place, remember? :-)

But again lemme tell you, follow the hadith, not necessarily the opinions above.

16
MOVIES

Many people just cannot imagine a life without movies. I was one of them. But now Alhamdulillah I am living a
life which is much better, without the movies.

When I say "Movies", I mean the cinema- Hollywood, Bollywood, Teakwood, Plywood & all other woods. I don't
mean the educative documentaries or movies which don't have even one percent unislamic element in it. Most
of Harun Yahya's documentaries, or the movies like "The Message" and "Lion of the Desert" are acceptable in
my opinion.

So keeping the "Cinema" meaning of Movies lets discuss further.

All the movies show free intermingling of the sexes, after watching which, we don’t find anything wrong in
the idea. Whereas, Islam strictly prohibits it. It also steals our precious time & channelizes it into such useless
& harmful, brainwashing ideas. We must abstain from all such vain desires which do nothing but harm to us, in
both worlds.

11:16 [yet] it is they who, in the life to come, shall have nothing but the fire -for in vain shall be all that
they wrought in this [world], and worthless all that they ever did !
15:3 Leave them alone; let them eat and enjoy themselves the while the hope [of vain delights] be guiles
them: for in time they will come to know [the truth].

Many people try and justify a particular movie they watch for entertainment. But, tell me brothers, doesn't
the movie project an unashamed and immoral idea (like "pre-marital sex", hooligans being projected as
heroes, etc)? Doesn't it have a single song? That’s enough to make it watching, wrong. Whether a movie has
got explicit content or not, it has to be avoided. Whether the actors are nude, semi-nude or are wearing
salwaar or using a talwaar or whatever, it still is prohibited. Again, I’m talking of the “Cinema” meaning of
the movies.

They say 'But there's very little of it in the movie, just a little here and there.'
So if I give you orange juice adding to it a little urine, will you drink?
No?
Why not? C'mon there's very little of it in the juice, just a few drops here and there!!
So when we wont drink orange juice even with just one drop of urine in it, why should Allah accept our faith
which has even a little bit of dark spot in it??? Well, it is Allah, the most merciful. So He may, provided we
repent sincerely and amend. I'm not inventing a Fatwa here, I'm just using logic based on the following

17
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze. " (Al-Noor 24: 30 - 31)

“And those who do not bear witness to falsehood, and if they pass by some evil play or evil talk, they
pass by it with dignity”[al-Furqaan 25:72]

Whenever they commit an indecent act, they say, "We found our fathers doing it and God commanded us
to do it too." Say: "God does not command indecency. Do you say things about God you do not know?"
(Qur'an, 7:28)

Note: Though the above verses were revealed in the context of referring them to the mushriks (polytheists)
and those who plot evil against Allah, they go well in referring to the munafiqoon (hypocrites) as well.

NOVELS AND TV

Question from a Muslim sister on the website islam-qa.com:

My favorite hobby is reading foreign love stories which sometimes describe love scenes between the hero and
heroine in detail. Please note that I pray and wear hijab and I fear Allah a great deal and I have never had any
relationship with a boy before. But I am a romantic girl and I like to listen to music and watch romantic
movies, but these stories bother me.

Answer:
Praise be to Allah.

Firstly:

Reading love stories results in many evils, especially if the reader is young. These evils include: provocation of
desire, and stirring up of bad thoughts and fantasies, attachment to the hero or heroine of the story, and
wasting time in something that brings no spiritual or worldly benefit, rather in most cases it cases harm. Islam
came to close the door that leads to anything haraam; it enjoins lowering the gaze and forbids being alone
with a member of the opposite sex or speaking in a soft tone, and other things that may provoke desire or
lead to immoral actions. Undoubtedly reading these stories is the exact opposite of that, because they
promote the wish to get to know men and form relationships with them, and fall in love with them, in
addition to showing immoral images of love and meetings etc. Undoubtedly all of that is haraam.

get the full answer here: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=72204&ln=eng&txt=movie

18
Question: (Islam-qa)
Is watching TV permitted in Islam? If so under what conditions ?

Answer:
Praise be to Allah.

The issue of watching films is not free from numerous reservations from a shar’ia point of view, such as
uncovering ‘awraat, listening to music, spreading corrupt beliefs and calling for imitation of the kuffaar. Allah
has commanded us to lower our gaze, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts
(from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All Aware of what they do. And tell the
believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from
illegal sexual acts)” [al-Noor 24:30-31].

Since lowering the gaze is the basis of protecting the private parts, it is mentioned first. Allah has made the
eyes the reflection of the heart: if a person lowers his gaze, the desire in his heart will be reduced, but if a
person looks and stares, the desire in his heart will be provoked.

for full answer copy-paste the link: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=3633&ln=eng

Question: (understanding-islam.org)

May Allah Almighty be with you all.

My question is:

Is watching Television allowed in the religion as you come across so many Na Mehrams and Women as well.
Please let us know in the light of modern day living where it has taken the shape of an important factor in our
daily lives.

Answer:

In the contemporary world, it seems that television has, to a great extent, become unavoidable. Because of
its unchallengeable position as a source of knowledge and up to date information, it has become quite
difficult to do without it. However, with the high degree of nudity that it generally shows and its presentation
of women as 'commodities', it is spreading a lot of evil as well.

Due to this double faceted effect of television (and other communication media), a God-fearing person should
try to pick the programs, which are likely to benefit him and his family and provide them with healthy
entertainment. While all such programs, which are likely to soil his mind and soul should be avoided, as far as
possible.

Watching television, per se, cannot, however, be termed as prohibited.

I hope this helps.

19
CHATTING

9:65 Yet, indeed, if thou wert to question them. they would surely answer, "We were only indulging in
idle talk, and were playing [with words]. Say: "Were you, then. mocking at God and His messages and His
Apostle?
23:67 [and,] impelled by your arrogance, you would talk senselessly far into the night.”
28:55 and, whenever they heard frivolous talk, having turned away from it and said: “Unto us shall be
accounted Our deeds, and unto you, your deeds. Peace be upon you - [but] we do not seek out such as
are ignorant [of the meaning of right and wrong].”
43:83 But leave them to indulge in idle talk and play [with words] until they face that [Judgment] Day of
theirs which they have been promised

[Note: Again, the above verses are in reference to the Mushriks of Makkah, but are very apt in this context, so
I feel]

It is not permissible for any man to correspond with a woman who is not his mahram, because of the fitnah
(temptation) involved in that. A person may think that there is no fitnah, but the Shaytaan will keep trying
until he tempts him.

Question: (islamqa.com)
I hope you can advise me on the ruling on entering chat rooms and discussion boards. I only go there for fun
and to see some of the topics under discussion, and you can well imagine the kind of bad talk that goes on in
those places. Please advise me about this, may Allah preserve you.

Answer:
Praise be to Allah.

One of the things that the Muslim should do is discipline himself and seek to adopt the best of attitudes and
etiquette. This requires a great deal of striving against bad inclinations and it needs a lot of patience. The
most important thing that can help him to do that is avoiding places of evil and places that could lead to his
doom. The scholars of personal development are unanimously agreed that man is inherently weak and inclined
towards evil, and that it is the mind (or reason) that could controls his attitude and inclinations, and guide his
energies. So if reason does not restrain one’s inclinations towards following whims and desires, then he will
soon find no means to turn back to the path of salvation.

The same applies to gatherings of leisure and entertainment. They have always been - and still are, as they
appear on the internet - a waste of energy and talent, where followers of falsehood who have no mission to
work or succeed in their lives gather, and they waste their time and their lives which are the most precious
things they own, and they spend their days exchanging gossip, and they waste a lot of time and do not
achieve anything for their worldly or religious interests.

When the Muslim has the blessing of free time with which Allah has honored him, he can do no more than look
for the best deeds with which to fill his time, not just any good deed. Hence you see that the Sahaabah (may
Allaah be pleased with them) asked the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in many
ahaadeeth about the best actions by means of which they could attain a higher status before Allaah, and the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) answered their questions.

20
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are two blessings which many people do
not make the best of: good health and free time.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (6412).

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, speaking of regret about time:

Regret for wasted time should be deep, for time passes quickly and it is difficult to make up what you have
missed.

Time for the worshipper is a time for worship and reciting awraad, and for the devoted Muslim it is time for
turning to Allaah and focusing on Him with all his heart.

Time is the dearest thing to him and he would feel very sad if time passes without him doing what he is meant
to do. If he misses time, he can never make it up, because a second time has its own duties. So if he misses
time, there is no way he can bring it back.

Madaarij al-Saalikeen (3/49).

The most important things that will help you make the most of your time is to avoid futile gatherings and
refrain from talking too much and keep away from lazy and idle people, and to keep company with those who
are striving hard, clever, smart and aware of time, and those ho immerse themselves in reading for the
purpose of increasing their knowledge.

The wise man is the one who is guided to fill his time with useful, beneficial and good deeds; thus he will
advance and rise in status. So you will find him always seeking knowledge, or writing lessons, or learning a
skill, or visiting relatives or a sick person, or advising one who has gone astray, or earning a living so that he
can spend on his dependents and save them from having to ask of people.

‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:

I would hate to see any one of you idle and not doing anything to help himself in this world or in the
Hereafter.

Quoted by Abu ‘Ubayd al-Qaasim ibn Sallaam in al-Amthaal (48).

The Muslim has no time to listen to or look at sinful things. You know that these conversations include things
that go against sharee’ah such as immoral talk and bad attitudes, so is entering these foul swamps something
that will benefit a Muslim, or is it anything that he should seek in his life?

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “Strive to do that which will benefit you and seek the help of Allaah.” Narrated by Muslim (2664).

When Allaah asks you on the Day of Resurrection about this time that you wasted in idle talk and writing
and conversing about things that are of no benefit, rather they will harm you, what will your answer be?
It was narrated that Abu Barzah al-Aslami said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: “A person’s feet will not move on the Day of Resurrection until he is asked about his life
and how he spent it, his knowledge and what he did with it, and his wealth, how he acquired it and how
he spent it, and his body (health), and how he used it.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (2417), classed as saheeh
by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb (126).

Finally, you should note:

That these chat rooms have corrupted the morals of many people; they have caused rifts between loved ones,
men have divorced their wives because of them, women have lost their honor because of them, and those
who are weak in faith and lacking in knowledge have been deceived by the specious arguments and myths in
them, and have thus been misled. If the Muslim hears of an environment that is filled with fitnah and sin, he
should denounce the people involved and strive to set them straight - if he is one of those who are able for
that - otherwise he should keep away from such environments and not be deceived by thinking that his faith is
strong or that he knows what they really are, and that he is just having fun.
21
Beware of indulging in chat rooms on the internet, and protect yourself from the immorality and evil that is in
them, for they are gatherings that bring little benefit but cause a great deal of harm; they are of no benefit
in this world and do not bring salvation in the Hereafter.

If you find that you are getting drawn into fitnah and sin, such as speaking to women unnecessarily and
speaking too much to this one and that one, then you should realize that you are in grave danger, and we
hope that you will save yourself from it and resist falling into the trap of the shaytaan.

We have discussed the danger of chat rooms in many answers on this site, such as 34841 and 78375.

And Allaah knows best.

Question: (understanding-islam.org)
Is Chatting wrong in Islam with Na Mehram? I have this question. Please give me an honest answer. Do you
really think that this is considered wrong in Islam?
Maria Zaki

Answer:
The important thing with regard to your question is not the relationship, or the lack thereof, between the
male and his female chat partner. On the contrary, the important factor is the nature and content of the
'chat'. Nevertheless, in view of the potential emotional, moral and socio-moral repercussions of romantic
chatting between young men and women, it would be highly recommended to refrain from such exchanges.

Islam does not prohibit men and women from healthy exchanges relating to their profession, education etc.,
yet it wants both men as well as women to adhere to the prescribed etiquette of interaction to save
themselves from any negative social, moral and emotional repercussions of such interaction. Similarly, it
would be highly recommended, in my opinion, for unrelated males and females to avoid engaging in overly
personal exchanges with each other even on chat-channels and, thereby, save themselves from the
potentially hazardous repercussions of such exchanges.

I hope this helps.

Regards,
Moiz Amjad

Question: (islam-qa.com)
My question is about the adab or the manner between a brother and sister?
I need clarification, are we allowed to give salaam to sister who is not your mehram or talk to her as you talk
to a brother, and how much you allowed to talk?
And what about the non-mehram who are cousins, for example the uncles daughter Am I allowed to give
salaam and talk to her, and how is her life? Please provide for me daleel(proof) and what about marriage?
What allowed talk and salaam, (what is allowed and not) all these things!
Because today people mixed between culture and deen, when you tell them about that they say you are
bringing new religion!, even a lot brothers who religious don't know this, you may see salafy brother talking
weetlgy to sister who were nikab and not his mehram,

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

In brief, what the fuqaha’ have said about women’s voices is that they are not ‘awrah in and of themselves,
and there is nothing wrong with listening to them when there is a need to do so, so they do not forbid
listening to them, but certain conditions apply, as follows:

The woman should speak without elongating the words, making her voice soft, or raising her voice. It is
haraam for a man to listen with enjoyment, for fear of fitnah (temptation).
22
The decisive factor for knowing what is haraam in the matter of women’s speaking is what is included in the
aayah (interpretation of the meaning):

“O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women. If you keep your duty (to Allaah), then be not soft
in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery, etc.) should be moved
with desire, but speak in an honorable manner.” [al-Ahzaab 33:32]

What is forbidden is being too soft in speech. It is obligatory for women to speak in an honourable manner,
which means, as the mufassireen explained, that they should not make their voices soft when addressing men.
In conclusion, what is required of the Muslim woman when she speaks to a non-mahram man is that she should
adhere to what is mentioned in this aayah. She should refrain from what is forbidden and should fulfill her
duties. She should speak only when necessary, and only about matters that are permissible and honourable,
not evil. Between a woman and a non-mahram man there should be no intonation, gestures, chat, joking,
flirting or playful talk, so that there will be no room for provocation of desires and doubts. Women are not
prevented from talking to non-mahram men when it is necessary to do so, such as dealing directly with them
when buying things or conducting any other financial transaction, because in such cases it is necessary for
both parties to speak. A woman may also ask a scholar about some legal Islamic matter, or a man may ask a
woman such questions, as is proven in various texts of the Qur’aan and Sunnah. Within the guidelines
described above, there is nothing wrong with a woman speaking to a non-mahram man. It is also permissible
for men to greet women with salaam and vice versa, according to the most correct opinion, but this greeting
must be free of anything that may provoke desire in the person in whose heart is a disease, so as to be safe
from fitnah and pay attention to the regulations outlined above.

If there is fear of fitnah being provoked by this greeting, then the woman should refrain from either initiating
or returning the greeting, because warding off fitnah by neglecting the greeting is warding off mischief, and
warding off mischief takes precedence over doing something useful. (See al-Mufassal fi Ahkaam al-Mar’ah by
‘Abd al-Kareem Zaydaan, vol 3/276). And Allaah knows best.

Look at the following question from a revert. Alhamdulillah, the reverts are fearing Allah & the final day
whereas we born-Muslims have no fear.
Question:
PLEASE HELP, IT’S URGENT! (May Allah make you see this).
I need your advice, I became Muslim 4 years ago, I got married 3 years ago (or there abouts). I do not live with
my husband as our marriage is secret, his parents do not know about me yet. Anyway the point is, I do not get
to see my husband as often as I would like, and as a result I became lonely, and in my stupidity and
selfishness and inpatience, I started to speak to NON MAHRAMS over the internet!!!! (May Allah forgive me). I
spoke you quite a few of them, and told them I was not married, and to some of them I said I was divorced or
getting divorced. Also I gave one of them an old picture of me without hijab, My hair, neck and arms were
uncovered!!!!!!! This was all months ago, and I have repented for my crimes, and I have cried for fear of my
grave and the Day of Judgment. I fear Allah so much and have cut off all ties with these people, I no longer
speak to any men over the internet as I know Shaytaan temps human beings. I am truly ashamed of what I
have done, and feel so guilty for it. I love my husband and he is going to tell his family about me soon
inshaAllah. But I do not want to hurt him or embarrass him by having to call things off because of what I have
done, I do not want to lose him. Do I have to tell him what I have done??? And what about the Photo, I hate
what I did, but what if the boy still has it???? Will I go to hell????? And as for me telling people I was divorced
or getting divorced, is my marriage still valid??????? I know I have ruined my life, but please help me, Allah
knows best my intentions, I do not want to hurt anyone or do wrong in the sight of Allah. I want to do what is
best for everyone concerned, I want to cover myself, can I do this. Please help me as I'm in so much pain.
Answer: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=72198&ln=eng&txt=chatting

Question:
I am a female college student. My problem is that I have gotten to know a young man over the internet. In the
beginning the relationship was one of respect and exchanging information, until it turned into love. My
mother rejects the idea of me marrying him, and she has threatened to tell my father about this relationship.
I cannot do without him and he feels the same way, because he has told me that he will commit suicide if we
cannot get married. I hope that you can advise me. I cannot be apart from him and he does not.
Answer: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=21933&ln=eng&txt=chat
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Chapter-3

REASONS FOR MAKING A GF/BF

For all the cool dudes and dudettes of Islam whom this doesn't suffice, read on.

Most of the young people get into such relations bcoz they say, "It’s cool". Now that’s a vague reply which
could mean anything. Many other reasons quoted by Abu-Mujahid are:

Competition: The more no. of gfs/bfs u have, the more popular u r.

Boredom: Go fall in his/her arms to feel the thrill & excitement of life. Who else can make u feel wanted &
desirable (especially when u r low in self esteem).

Peer pressure: If u don have one, u r a "geek".

Love and Care: You cannot share your problems with the person of the same sex, it’s too itchy!!

For those who say it’s COOL. I ask, who says that? The world! Nopes, not the world, but the Western society-
that is where the rest of the world borrowed this idea of "gf-bf relationships" being Cool or Fashionable. It is
the Western Society (mainly US), which started to fantasize what is immoral & indecent as fashionable &
good. & we r their blind slaves. They ask guyz to pierce their ears, grow longer hair than galz & confide only
in galz & do all sorts of girly stuff. On the other habd, they ask the galz to shorten their clothes, cut their
hair, wear no earring, don jeans & t-shirts & to become all tomboyish. All the guyz & galz follow suit. they
puke, we swallow; they spit, we lick. if they ask us to tear our jeans, we do that. If they ask us to shorten our
clothes, we do that. & if they ask us to strip, we do just that. Next they would make eating shit
fashionable, & we will still do that.
I found this on an Islamic forum:

Copy 'em, Copy 'em blindly.

Wednesday, November 8th, 2006

This is Lahore, Pakistan.

Source: http://www.dawn.com/

And this is Dewsbury, West Yorkshire, England.

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The contrast speaks for itself, doesn’t it?
To be honest, don’t you find the Lahoris above, just simply wannabes? Copying the West like fools. And look
at our sisters in the West- Even after being a minority there, they have the courage to follow Islam in & out.
Even the West belongs to Allah, even the East & everything. I feel they are the "men of understanding" that
the Quran refers to.

The other day I was with my Muslim friend in a mall where he saw a model & said, "Gosh! she's hot!!" , ". and
Hell is hotter", I continued. "Hey now gimme a break for God's sake buddy!" said He. I said, "not for God's sake
pal, it’s for your sake that u need to mend". "Look, I'm not goin & foolin around with her, I'm just looking at
her, man" he said.
We talk bout Hijab for women, but before women, Allah has prescribed the Hijab for men
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for
greater purity for them. " (Al-Noor 24: 30 - 31)

He asks, "So what should I do, take up Monasticism o what?". I said, "that concept doesn’t exist in Islam.
Monasticism or Celibacy isn't permitted". "Then what is permitted?" He asked. I said, "marriage; not just
permitted, but obligatory". "Till the time I marry if I mustn't look at galz or have fun with them, my privy
would get rusted,” he said. I said, "Why? Is it made of Iron? Paint it then".
I know that was a bit provocative, but my blood was boiling to see a fellow Muslim brother who's elder to me
acting like this, that I replied thus. Now u c, I'm not amongst those smarter ones so I hadn't got better replies,
but I urge u all to use your Hikmah (wisdom) to deal with such people.

It’s everywhere, In everyone's heart- the haraam culture. (Note that I’m talking about the haraam part of
their culture and not the culture on the whole. Because there are American Muslims who are very pious even
after following the American culture, after ignoring just the haraam part of it. That’s very fine.)
We make the Westerners our trendsetters, our idols, role models, we would b delighted to have them as our
companions even when they go to any extreme in their propaganda against Islam. These propagandists r very
cunning & sly. I can show u hundreds of websites and forums online where they spread lies about Islam & our
Prophet (pbuh). Yes, it’s their culture that we follow, those which r exactly the opposite of Islamic culture.
They are not our idols or companions brothers, please beware. For Allah says

"And if anyone withdraws himself from the remembrance of [Allah] All-Gracious, We appoint for him an
evil one to be an intimate companion to him. Such evil ones really hinder them from the Path, but they
think that they are being guided aright! At length, when [such a one] comes to Us, he says, [to his evil
companion], "Would that between me and you were the distance of east and west". Ah, evil is the
companion indeed! When you have done wrong, it will avail you nothing, that Day that you shall be
partners in punishment". (43:36-39)

25
And when I say that this culture is unIslamic or haram, I get some silly questions like, "oh! so u mean
everything they do is haram? Should we stop eating bread & butter, & pizzas, & stop talking English also?" :-/
Do I need to comment?

We’ll get back to this West & its culture later on in the chapter "Collapse of the West".

COMPETITION:

For those who make gfs/bfs to COMPETE with their friends:

"If u have it, u must flaunt it" - that’s the Western logo to prompt the good looking people to expose & make
"good" use of their looks.

I've a friend in my college - A Muslim brother, Saif. Praise be to Allah, he’s a very orthodox Muslim & a
staunch practicer of Islam. He's got looks that would put all the Hrithiks & Afflecks to shame. Girls go oodles
over him (do I need to say that?). Such guyz r hot property especially here in Christ. He's got a beard (Which
he's grown for Allah's sake alone.). Whenever he walks in the campus, girls look at him & scream "Oh my God ,
Saif. Saif, Saif. oooohhhhhh. & they swoon ;->". Trust me, they're that crazy. Lol. What would any other guy in
his place do? Date 5 galz a day. But he spares not even his shoes' dust for them. Now I'm not saying he doesn’t
respect women. He does respect modest girls, but not the kind of respect the other guyz do- by touching or
hugging & what not. He's reserved his love for just one in his life & that is obviously his future wife Insha
Allah. Never even looks at galz, leave alone making gfs. You can come over to my coll & I’ll show you him.
Now this person is a human, all flesh & bones. So when he can do it, y not we, being the lesser good-looking
ones? A lesson to both- brothers as well the sisters.
Do you still say, 'If u have it u must flaunt it'? Do we still need to be in the "competition"? What justification
can we give Allah on that day?

And the Girls must learn not to make their voices seductive or sweet in front of non-Mehram. This is done by
lowering the voice and not flirting. As Allah tells the wives of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) ".do not be too
pleasant of speech, lest one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire for you." [33:32]

Fatimah(raa), the daughter of the Prophet(pbuh) was a lady of extreme modesty and shame. She wished that,
when she dies, her body be concealed with date branches so that nobody can see the make of her body. She
dreaded any ghair-mahram viewing her body even after death!! Allahu Akbar. The Prophet(pbuh) had told her
that she would be the mistress of all the ladies of paradise.

These are humans with the same feelings and desires as us, but they have the highest level of taqwa and piety
and are closest to Allah because of that; the best of examples that we need learn to from.

When we say women are the greatest fitnah or attraction for men, it is not blaming women. Women are of a
26
different nature. They have the nature to be more loyal and generally have more sabr (patience) than men.
They can impose a greater amount of self-control on themselves than men. Allah made men and women like
that, probably to test each in a different way. That’s why He commanded a uniform for women- the Hijab.
“O prophet, tell your wives, your daughters, and the women of the believers that they shall lengthen
their garments. Thus, they will be recognized (as righteous women) and avoid being insulted. GOD is
Forgiver, Most Merciful.” [33:59]

That’s the test (in this respect) of the sisters- whether they let themselves loose (by abandoning the Hijab)
for men to pounce, or preserve their dignity and chastity
And the test of the brothers- whether they “lower their gaze” [24:30] and respect the sisters and not the grab
the opportunity to flirt, or exploit them

Right now I know what many of u would b thinking- “Huh! He’s old & I’m cool”. Well, it’s not your prob. That
pride & ego in u is instilled by Satan. He wont let your heart soften; no ways. He’s sworn clear vengeance to
Allah. Unless you want to, & unless you try, He’ll have his control upon you. Even I had the same thinking
when I was on the wrong track. But strive in the way of Allah and Allah will surely give you hidaaya InshaAllah.

Arrogance: This is a quality shared by most of the people of Hell. Allah (swt) says:
"But those who reject Our Signs and treat them with arrogance - they are the Companions (dwellers) of
the Fire, to dwell therein [forever]" (7:36)

PEER PRESSURE:

The circle of responsibility that Allah has drawn around us, is, first our family, then our relatives, then our
neighbors and then our friends. But we think it is the other way round. We don wanna displease our friends at
any cost, even at the cost of our parents' displeasure. I hear many young guyz saying "My friends r everything
to me" as though they're gonna come to our rescue when Allah will be putting us in Hell on the Deciding day.

When in ma First PU, one of the girls in ma group, KJ had a best friend who waz a Muslim sister. She was,
again a staunch Muslim who used to come to college in her burqa & kept away from guyz so she didn’t join our
group. KJ used to go home with her & come to college with her. Even her parents trusted only this Muslim
sister. Once Rishab threw a party at his place. All of us in the group were successful in convincing our parents
to stay out until night (obviously giving a different reason), but KJ wasn't. Her mom said, If her friend (this
Muslim sis) was going with her then she would allow. So all of us tried hard to convince her friend to join us,
so that KJ could join us too. (Without KJ we would b one gal short. u c, equality is what we believed in. lol).
But she never gave in. Her reply was "whether u ask me once or ask me hundred times, my answer is NO". She
never looked at us guyz but would only reply to the galz. Suddenly respect for this sister grew manifold in ma
heart. The next day I announced that even I wouldn’t be coming. Another person backed out & the party was
inevitably cancelled. Thanks to the Muslim sister. LOOK, one fresh tomato can better many rotten
tomatoes, thus reversing the saying. Alhamdulillah.

27
She really thought me a big lesson. Peer pressure is not at all hard to fight. We are most responsible to Allah
& the least to our friends. And if those friends r pressurizing u to do some wrong, then your responsibility
towards them becomes nil as regards this wrong.

I know, there’s a hell lotta Fitna out there, especially in colleges. But hold on tightly to the rope of Islam and
InshaAllah you’ll be able to fight the Fitna. Sport a beard, and wear a cap even in the coll. I rem the first time
I decided to wear a cap(the Islamic one and not the “Chicago Bulls” type ;->) I got confused and surprised
stares. Questions started to pour in from everyone, right from ma frens, classmates to ma lectures. It was sort
of obvious. What with my then extrovert and the “happy-go-lucky“ type personality. A person who was a
common unit in all groups, who used to direct skits and mad-ads with ‘bold’ humor (u know wat I mean by
‘bold’), who would enter to into debate even with the HOD just to ridicule him, who would give ‘tips’ to guyz
to attract a particular gal and vice versa and who had hosted the college day jus a couple of years back wit
the so-called bold talk for the whole coll to listen, He, has come to coll wit a round cap symbolizing god-
consciousness, piety!!! Well, could it be more difficult for anybody than this, to change one’s persona? At
least the thought “what will my frens think” will haunt the mind while taking the decision. But Alhamdulillah,
All glory and praise belongs to Allah, he gave me the courage to go ahead with the decision. I let my beard
grow (add my family to the protestants list) and wore the round cap to coll. Allah gave me enough patience
and perseverance to silence the critics especially in my coll. Now, in this state no one will even think of
talking haraam or suggesting to do something haraam. At least after you’ve explained to them Islam’s stand
on things which are good and bad. This harmless cap (topi) does great wonders from preventing you
comprehensively from haraam. You’ve the consciousness of representing Islam and will avoid it yourself.

I had a heated debate with one of ma old' school friend bout Women's rights in Islam. She was defending her
(haram part of the) Western lifestyle. After a point she got cornered without having any answers. Observing
the change in me, she says, "I don like the current you. I liked u in School. What caused the change?" I laughed
and said, "Thanx a lot! If I'm in a state where u don’t like me, then that state would be one where Allah likes
me, but If I’m in a state where you like me, then that state would be one where Allah dislikes me. Thanks for
giving me a hint that Allah likes me now; Thanks a ton for disliking me :-)". Again, I didn’t wanna insult her,
but I’d no better answer, then.

The question that pops up here is why should we try to impress our collage mates, our friends, and people of
the opposite sex? Isn't it enough that we impress Allah? Just submit yourself to Allah, following all His
commands & remember Him, and He'll take care of all your needs. All. Everything. I've tried it & found it to
be true. You will too. So true that if someone bribes u with a billion dollars to change your path,
Alhamdulillah u won’t. Just discover this path. May Allah give all of us Hidayah.

But no, we go to college only for that fun & masti, how can we stop it huh? These dayz, colleges r multi-
purpose centers. They’re study centers alright, but they are also meeting centers for lovers, marriage fixing
centers (where the students choose their future brides & grooms), casinos (where students gamble with their
careers, life & everything), centers for “socializing” (or rather, for choosing your “c**** ”), centers for cheap
fun (ragging & abuse), centers for trading drugs & for fagging, centers for eve-teasing, centers for body
marketing, U can add on.

We are so much concerned bout our future livelihood, our future partner & everything, that we take it up in
our hands, breaking our heads over impressing this person & that. & Ultimately, whether we get what we
want or not, we wont get happiness. We wont get peace. We wont get a life of bliss. We wont get a life free
from tensions & troubles & problems & depressions & what not. These can be granted only by Allah no
matter how hard we try. I speak outta experience.

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NEED FOR LOVE

"We have not sent the Quran to be for thy distress" (Quran 20:2)

Islam isn't "difficult" it is practical. Allah Himself has created these Testosterone and Oxytocin (I hope I got
'em rite :-0) hormones in us that regulate our desires for a mate. And to fulfill those desires he's created a
beautiful institution called marriage. Your spouse could be your best friend and counselor. A few compromises
and adjustments, if required, and your desire for a partner to share love with, is fulfilled. Still, you’re a very
good Moslem. :-> In fact, you can be a perfect Muslim only if you’re married when It’s due on you.

Even for your physical desires marriage is the answer. In fact, we get rewards even for actions which give
pleasure, provided it’s done the right way. So even in deriving pleasure, we get sawaab if it's done the Halal
Way!! Check this hadeeth out:

In the sexual act of each of you there is a sadaqah (charity or gift)." The Companions replied: "O
Messenger of God! When one of us fulfils his sexual desire, will he be given a reward for that?" And he
said, "Do you not think that were he to act upon it unlawfully, he would be sinning? Likewise, if he acts
upon it lawfully he will be rewarded."

But again, remember, this “love” is not what we’re living for. It is just a part of life and not life itself. Life
has a purpose much above this. So even in marriage, one shouldn’t forget his/her purpose of creation. Life
should be God-centric and not Partner-centric

But what about the bachelors & spinsters? The hormones still exist before marriage too. Agreed. First of all
make Dua and Allah will protect you InshaAllah. Next, keep away from all sources of evil that may tempt us
into falling in one such relationship, like the movies, TV soaps, music, etc. We’ll get back to these sources
later. If your friends also are one such source, then change them. It’s better to have no friends than to have
bad ones. Keep yourself busy with some work or the other all the time giving your mind no chance for vacuum
For those who can impose control on themselves with their will, then Alhamdulillah, go ahead. But for those
who need a practical solution, Islam has one- Fast.

Narrated 'Abdullah:
We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O
young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and
guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is
not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power." Sahih Bukhari: Volume 7, Book 62,
Number 4.

It is Sunnah to fast every Monday & Thursday hence these two days are preferable. My cousin in the US (u c,
there’s a lotta fitna in the West) used this solution till he married recently, I use this solution now and believe
me, it’s not difficult at all. It makes u feel more pious and closer to Allah. Ur family may oppose initially to
your over-fasting, i.e., every Mondays and thursdays, but I'm sure they’ll agree if u convince 'em using good
manners. I don feel the need to even talk to any gal at all. I feel happier and more at peace than ever before.
All praise & thanks are due to Allah.

29
I hear lotza elder brothers & sisters cribbing that their parents don luv them, they don care for them &
other nonsense. The fact is that, they don make any efforts to make their parents show their luv to 'em. It
was the case with me too, but now Alhamdulillah I've learnt how to. For instance, I called up my dad for no
reason. This was the first time that I did that & he was surprised. He stopped his work for sometime & started
talking to me & we're talking like two ol' friends Alhamdulillah, discussing about the kind of food that he
gets there, etc. He asked me what mom had cooked at home & I said, “u really wanna know?” (cause he
would otherwise be tempted but unfortunately couldn’t feast on it  ) He said, “ok don’t tell”. I said, “no,
lemme tell you”, He was like “No, thank you”.. I was like, “no,listen I’ll tell ya”.. & it went on.. 
And mind you There is a very big age-gap b/w me & ma dad.

With ma mom- I was traveling with her once when she pointed out to me a nameplate outside the gate of a
house on which was written “Syed Shariff” (both are surnames).. I said, “the only thing lacking in the name
was ‘Khan’” and we laughed 
On another occasion, I’d to teach ma mom to eat nonveg so I got a chicken roll for her. The Dr had advised
her to eat non. She said she won’t eat & I became a kid, acting silly & forcing her; emotionally blackmailed
her, telling her that I bought it from my own money & was forcing her. She didn’t budge, I was trying to feed
her myself, she closed her mouth with her hand shouting "I won’t eat, I won’t eat", I didn’t budge too. I stood
there holding it for ten mins until she gave in & took a few bites. All of us were laughing aloud.
I was not at all close to, or creating fun with my parents before. I meant only business with ‘em. I wouldn’t
talk anything else to 'em. I realized, change yourself & everything around u will change InshaAllah.

And about having companionship and friendship- if all you need is a friend or companion, then why not
someone of the same gender? :-| Don’t you honestly think that a guy-girl relationship will lead to more if
they spend too much time together and share too much of themselves (emotionally/mentally, not just
physically) together? Well, this was just a small justification from my side. To this I get lotza Muslims saying,
"No that’s not true. There can be a 'pure' friendship b/w a guy & a gal".

Lemme make it clear- whether we understand the ways of Islam o not, we've got to follow it without reserving
a second option. Allah, in his infinite wisdom, has framed the rules for mankind, which are the best. In every
rule of Allah, apart from the rewards of the hereafter, there seems to be an underlying benefit for this world
too. Even the smallest of small Sunnah of our Prophet has a worldly benefit. For e.g. Opening fast with dates-
there is a scientifically proven advantage of opening fast with dates.

Here appears the prophetic guidance: When fasting, a person relies on the sugar stocked in his body and
especially that is stocked in the liver. The sugar obtained from the food taken just before starting the fast
(i.e. ALSUHUR) lasts for six hours and then the body uses the sugar kept in the liver. When a person breaks his
fast with dates, rich in monosaccharides, those arrive quickly to the liver and then to the blood which carries
the nutrients to the other organs, whereas the person who fills up his stomach with food and drinks needs 2 to
3 hours to his intestines to absorb the sugar.
Dates also strengthen and increase the contraction rate of the uterus during the delivery and this is why Allah
said to the pure lady Maryam: (And shake towards thyself the trunk of the palm-tree: It will let fall fresh ripe
dates upon thee. [Quran])
It was reported that the Prophet (PBUH) said: “Feed your women with dates as those who are fed with dates
will have forbearing children”

This is just ONE example

Just a few tens of years back, we didn’t know its scientific benefit, but still Muslims all over the world
followed it. But now we know that, even when in their ignorance they followed the sunnah, they only
benefited. We know it now. So, there might be some things whose benefit we dunno now but we’ll know some
years later or on the day of judgment. Hence, whether we understand the rulings of Islam or not, we’ve to
follow it, i.e., the Quran and Saheeh Hadeeth. That’s the order of Allah.

It is Allah who used to infuse in our Prophet's (PBUH) mind- Both, the Quran & the Hadeeth. Some Sunnah, we
can understand, while some are beyond our comprehension. Whether we understand it, or we understand it
not, we've to follow it point-blank. Though Science has advanced so much, only about 55% of the scientific
facts of the Quran have been discovered by man!! How backward man is, and how advanced Islam is. So,
don't even think that you're smarter than Islam & thus will create your own fatwas. We've got to follow Islam
point-blank. So no friendships b/w a guy & a gal, whether u call it pure or sure.
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"It is better for a man that a steel nail be driven through the center of his head rather than if he touches
the palm of a strange women."- Muhaddith al-Ruyaani

I believe that if you have to speak to a man, be he a professor, employer, coworker, classmate, or someone
asking for directions, then it's acceptable, as long as you do not cross the lines. And strictly speaking, flirting
is NOT allowed. Sharing your experiences or better educate someone on Islam or academics or career is
acceptable to me (not sure Islamically though).

And yes, one more important thing is that we've to put some limits even on the relation that we share with
the friends of the same sex. Like, you may share your problems & all, but be careful not to get too intimate
that u develop unusual feelings. I'm referring to homosexuality. Could u believe that there could be
homosexuals amongst Muslims?! I couldn’t, until I discovered that one of ma close Muslim friends is one!!
Just thinking bout it makes me feel Sick!! :-I

Islam forbids homosexuality and the Quran treats it as a sin

We also (sent) Lut: He said to his people: "Do ye commit lewdness such as no people in creation (ever)
committed before you? For ye practise your lusts on men in preference to women: ye are indeed a
people transgressing beyond bounds." Al A'raf 7:80-81

"Of all the creatures in the world, will ye approach males, And leave those whom Allah has created for
you to be your mates? Nay, ye are a people transgressing (all limits)!" Al Shu'ara' 26:165-166

So for all those self-proclaimed Gays, why don’t u understand that it is “Adam & Eve” and not “Adam and
Steve”! Lahaula walaquwwah!!!

BOREDOM:

This is more of the sisters' (girls) reason of making a bf. Again, I’m not saying this is “only” the sisters reason,
don’t get me wrong.

I had this young sister, 2 years my junior who asks me one day, "Have u kissed your gf?" with a naughty smile.
(When I was committed, I’d shared all such secrets with many of ma ol’ frens- girls & boys. So, they knew).
This sister’s parents are orthodox Muslims! The sisters who're reading this may not believe, but again, Allah is
witness to what I'm saying. A flummoxed me asked her, "Y do u ask?!!". She said, "Well, I just wanna know how
it feels to kiss". I said, "If you r so desperate to know, then marry soon, ask your dad to marry u off soon".
But, as I said earlier, that’s not the way it’s shown in the movies rite. Women are symbolic of gentleness &
shyness & they are the most dependable for preserving modesty in the society. But today, we can only
shake our heads if someone says that.

It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abbaas said: The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah
31
be upon him) said: “I was shown Hell and I have never seen anything more terrifying than it. And I saw
that the majority of its people are women.” They said, “Why, O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “Because
of their ingratitude (kufr).” It was said, “Are they ungrateful to Allah?” He said, “They are ungrateful to
their companions (husbands) and ungrateful for good treatment. If you are kind to one of them for a
lifetime then she sees one (undesirable) thing in you, she will say, ‘I have never had anything good from
you.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1052)

So I said, "if u wanna know how it feels to kiss someone u aren't married to, then light a candle & burn your
lips or wherever u want the kiss to be planted. Still, that is just a shorter version of how it feels. Because
Allah’s gonna burn us in a fire that is 70 times hotter than the fire that we know now

The Prophet (saw) told us: "Fire as we know it is one-seventieth part of the Fire of Hell." Someone said,
"O Messenger of Allah (saw), it is enough as it is!" He said, "It [the fire of Hell] is as if sixty nine equal
portions were added to the fire as we know it." (al-Bukhaari)

We hear quite often bout guyz changing girlz just because they were bored being with the same girl(s) alwayz.
These guyz must call themselves "anonymous" bcoz their identity is gonna bring a bad name to the community
as well as to the society they belong. For other communities, it’s bcoz he changed hs gf; for Islam, it’s bcoz
he made a gf. But for a change, here we have gal who'z having that attitude. Another sister, a relative of
mine, on my asking, says she's made a bf. Before I could ask y she needed one, she tells me that she was
bored talking to the same friends & thus wanted to make new ones & one of the new guys went on to
become her bf. Can I call her a female swinger? Ashtaghfirullah!! The guy is a Muslim too. If the sisters don’t
give space to guyz how will the guys get close? I'm not telling guyz are left scot-free by Allah. They’re equally
to be blamed. But if the guyz' duty is to act modest (modest according to Islamic standards & not the
western), the galz shouldn't give the guyz space; even as mere "friends".

And the Muslim sisters of the hi-tech colleges- u can only find them revolving around guyz, or guyz revolving
around them. If only I could explain that they should have more self-respect than that. Sisters, you're worth
much more than the way you let yourself go ATM. You're created to serve Allah & not to serve your evil
desires and the desires of the wolves around you.

WHY GIVE BOREDOM A CHANCE?

I dunno why, ignoring all the halal options, people need to stick to this one only- make a gf/bf. I, and many of
my brothers and sisters in Islam do not require gfs/bfs to stay happy. In fact, we are better off without them.
We are a very small group of brothers (u may call friends) who strive to establish Islam. Our favorite pastime
is doing Islah & Da'wah on the net. We also delegate certain Islah & da'wah projects b/w us. I took up this
‘gf-bf’ one bcoz I've more related personal experiences. Trust me, we really derive great pleasure in
spreading the Truth. We also attend seminars & workshops on Islam, Personality Development & Da'wah
training & other Camps; watch videos & read books to keep updating our knowledge bout Islam; develop
strategies to give rebuttals to the narrow-minded Islamic critics; share our daily experiences, etc.
Apart from that I listen to the beautiful Halal Nasheeds of Zain Bhikha, Kamaluddin, Dawud Wharnsby Ali,
etc., Play games on the comp sometimes, browse the net to learn the stock market, play soccer at times,
exchange emails with my relatives who are far off.
Yet a few more- Check out new restaurants & cafes sometimes with ma friends, Play pillow fight with my
nieces & nephews (lol), share halal jokes with family & friends, Drench in the rain :-), call up my ol' buddies
& dozens of other things which don’t come to my mind at the moment.

It is most important for one to learn why (s)he was created by Allah. Once a person knows that, then (s)he
will never have space for boredom.

The first & the best thing that I feel, that a person can do in his/her spare time is Nafil Ibadah. Here I'm not
talking about the obligatory ibadah, like the 5 times Salah & fasting in Ramadan. Those, one has to do
whether one has time o not. No escaping that. I'm talking bout the supererogatory ibadah like Nifl salah &
fasting & dhikr which takes one closer to Allah. I was, earlier, a Friday Muslim & a Ramadan Muslim, praying
only at these times. In such a state, the person doesn’t actually have a firm belief in Allah or His powers &
promises. (s)he just thinks, just in case everything about Allah is true, then I at least have some ibadah (the
Friday & the Ramadan ones) to show to Him. This, is simply not accepted. We need to perform all obligatory
prayers by fearing Allah cause he's very severe in punishment. On that day, we’ll have no intercessor.
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"Then will no intercession of [any] intercessors profit them". (74:48)
".No intimate friend, nor intercessor will the wrongdoers have, who could be listened to". (40:18)

Ibadah also includes striving to gain more knowledge in Islam, study of the Qur'an, Hadith, the
history and the facts behind all the deeds we perform out of worship.

So that’s the first thing that is recommended by the scholars.

DA’WAH
The second & another very important thing for a Muslim to do, is Da'wah. The problem with us Muslims is
that, we think we've got the key to Jannah just becoz of the fact that we are Muslims.
al-Bukhaari narrates from Abu Sa'eed that the Prophet (saw) said: Allah will say, "O Aadam!" Aadam will
reply, "I respond to Your call, I am obedient to Your commands, and all good is in Your hands." Then Allah
(swt) will say to Aadam, "Send forth the people of the Fire". Aadam will say, "How many are the people of
the Fire?!" Allah (swt) will say, "Out of every thousand, take nine hundred and ninety-nine". -Al-Bukhari

Jannah is not cheap dear brothers & sisters. We need to work very hard for it. The non-Muslims have an
equal right to learn Islam, accept it & to enter Jannah as us. While their job is to seek, our job is to convey.
And in conveying we need to use the skills that Allah has granted us. One of my young cousins, sings well & so
his mom says she’ll send him to participate in that “Antakshari” competition that they see on TV.
Lahaulawalaquwwah! We use our God-given intelligence everywhere & for everything, but never for Islam.
Allah put us in cities- we have more sources to learn, & instead of teaching those in villages, we belittle 'em?
The other day another aunt was making fun of our village relatives by imitating their accent. We need to
question- Why did Allah put us in cities & bless us with all sorts of amenities? So that v show our superiority
over those who aren't blessed with it? & over the illiterates & lesser-educated ones? Y did he give us wisdom,
reasoning power, creativity, good memory, etc that would help us to become Drs & Engineers & CAs &
Executives, etc.? So that we earn well & serve only ourselves & our families? So that we eat well, sleep well;
enjoy life & die, without doing anything to serve Allah? If that is the case, then we are no better than swines
& all the other animals, bcoz even their purpose of life is the same. Allah created all the plants and animals &
everything good in it, for our (humans') sake & He created us for His sake.
And mind ya, Allah gives us an option b/w the joys of this life & the next. If we choose this life, then we’ll
have no share in the next.

"there are some people who say ,'Our lord give us good in the world. ‘They will have no share in the
hereafter. And there are others who say, ‘Our Lord, give us good in the world and good in the hereafter
and safeguard us from the punishment of the Fire. ‘They will have a good share from what they have
earned. Allah is swift at reckoning. (2:200-202)

And is their any comparison between the joys of earth & the joys of paradise? & is there a comparison b/w
the length of the life of this world & the next? The life of the next world is forever. And what is forever? It
means there wont be any death in the hereafter, be it in hell or in paradise. Our Prophet (PBUH) gives a small
simile by saying that, Dip your finger in the ocean & lift it. The water drop that falls from your finger is the
life of this world, & the water of all the oceans, is the life of the hereafter.

In one of the communities in a website, this topic came up- Is Sania Mirza right in playing tennis which
requires her to wear such an attire? U must c the hues & cries that our Muslim Sisters made over this. "If she
doesn’t wear that dress should she wear a Burqa & play? blah. blah." We ask, "y does she need to play? She
may become fully successful in it but is that a good trade, compromising with the life of the hereafter for the
life of this world?" OK now lets keep religion aside for awhile and analyze..

“Given the looks of the Hyderabad girl (Sania), she could well turn out to be a money-spinner for many a
company.” http://www.tribuneindia.com

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“It all goes hand in hand and there’s not much you can do,” she (Sania) says nonchalantly. “To be where we are
today, and to have these kind of tournaments, we need sponsors, and I think we owe them back in return. This
is how we give them back.” http://www.arabianbusiness.com
“Asia's top tennis player Sania Mirza will retain her strong brand value despite her decision to shun Indian
tournaments” http://economictimes.indiatimes.com
Indian Tennis player Sania Mirza wears T-shirt bearing the words like "Well-behaved women rarely make
history" (Is the moral of the story- Women must be bad-behaved to make history???), "Attitude Unlimited" and
many more. http://www.ezinearticles.com/
According to an article in Times of India, Sania has become the 2nd best pick for the advertisers for
endorsements, and is now positioned with Rahul Dravid, just behind Sachin Tandulkar. The Endorsement Fee
has increased to more than Rs 1.5 crore per endorsement per deal annually.(that was in 2005)
She is attractive and so a higher potential to grab attention – a factor that edges her over Rathore and
Kartikeyan in the Ad circuit.
- According to Mid-day , “when you take Sania as a package — personality, youth, looks, confidence and game
— she would do pretty well by ‘marketing’ standards”.
http://readbetweentheps.blogspot.com/

Similarly, Maria Sharapova earned 18mn USD for just a single ad of Sony Cyber shot while from tennis, her
earnings were just 6mn USD

Please note: There is no rule in tennis which says you should wear shorts or skirts compulsorily.
Moreover, now we have special polymer clothes which send the sweat out and block water from rain, etc to
come in.. But no one uses them.. Why?? They are unattractive you see.

So, is she marketing just her skills or something more than that? Have you an answer??

In order to truly show you how evil those women who expose themselves are, let us ponder over the following
statement of Allaah's Messenger: “There are two categories among the inhabitants of Hell whom I have
not encountered……………….The second are women who would be naked in spite of their being
dressed, drawn to licentiousness and enticing others to it, their heads like the swaying humps of camels –
they will neither enter Paradise nor even smell its fragrance, though its fragrance can be found to a great
distance.” [Sahîh Muslim (2127)]
"Then, for such as had transgressed all bounds, and had preferred the life of this world, the Abode will be
Hellfire" (79:37-39)
Al-Bukhaari and Muslim narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (saw) said, "Hell is veiled in desires and
Paradise is veiled in hardships".
Siddeeq Hasan Khan said, "What is meant by desires is the things that people want and enjoy".

The gals ask, "why do you ‘guys’ need to play?" We say, "We never defended Muslim guys playing tennis. If it
requires them to wear shorts, then it’s haraam because guyz are not supposed to expose their knees & the
area above it." And moreover, the Muslim cricketers who often miss their salat because of the game are at
a greater fault than Sania Mirza bcoz not performing the obligatory salat is a bigger sin than abandoning the
Islamic dress code. Atleast Sania Mirza performs her salat regularly,- “A devout Muslim, Sania never misses
her daily prayer when not playing, and she also observes fasts during the holy months.”
http://www.tribuneindia.com But this is not to mean that donning a haraam attire is a small sin. It also, is a big
sin.
U know the kind of messages & jokes that the guyz circulate bout your "idol" Sania Mirza? And the other filthy
ways people earn money in her name even without her knowledge (the ones who read news regularly in detail
will know what I’m saying). Does she like that? I bet she wont.
Yes, the Muslim guyz need to learn, but who’ll stop the non-Muslim guyz? Islam is trying to preserve her
modesty but she wants to let it go. Well, that was a big debate lets leave that now. We're not gonna speak
for her on judgment day, everybody speak for themselves. Allah has given her free will so let her herself
decide what she has to do, why do we break our heads over her. Again, it’s the media’s trick to create furore
amongst us Muslims, so lets not fight and get divided over it.

And plsssssssss, don’t get me wrong again.. I’m not preaching against playing per se.. In fact I myself play
few sports occasionally.. I’m talking about the competitive playing in front of the world, which comes at a
price of compromising part of, or full deen, like discarding hijab, skipping prayers, etc.. Have I driven my

34
point home?? Thank you very much.

But my point here was that, when u sisters, instead of being the preservers of faith become its disposers, can
you question the fairness of the hadith which says 'the majority of the people in Hell are women'?

Every breath that a carrying woman takes is counted as a sawaab for her- Just multiply the no. of breaths she
may take in that period. Mothers should get 75% of the love of the kids whereas fathers get only 25%
according to Islam, yet u complain; It’s the duty of the Men to win the bread & to protect their womenfolk by
exposing themselves to dangers & keeping the women safe, yet u complain; What you earn is yours
completely, but what we earn is also yours, yet you complain; We guyz need to go the Masjid to get greater
sawaab of Salah whereas the women get that greater Sawaab just by performing it at home, yet u complain;
It gives the women equal rights in education, social status and spiritual matters, yet u complain.

Quran commands men:

O YOU who have attained to faith! It is not lawful for you to [try to] become heirs to your wives [by
holding onto them] against their will; and neither shall you keep them under constraint with a view to
taking away anything of what you may have given them, unless it be that they have become guilty, in an
obvious manner, of immoral conduct. And consort with your wives in a goodly manner; for if you dislike
them, it may well be that you dislike something which God might yet make a source of abundant good.
[4:19]

There are hundreds of other advantages which you have over us guyz about which Allah knows best. Men &
Women are equal, but not identical. That is why women need to have more clothing on them than men &
not the other way round.

Do not question the justice of Allah. By questioning the fairness of any of His rule for men or women, we
would be attributing an error to Him & that is a kind of Shirk. Allah may forgive any sin but Shirk. So we've
got to be very, very careful in our thinking.

What I wanted to convey here is that, when men and women have equal rights, women must be equally
participative in Islah & Da'wah activities. I can name hundreds of Male da'ees of international fame, but
Female Da'ees, just one- Ameenah Assilimi. When questioned, the sisters give lame excuses like, we aren't
given opportunities. Nobody's gonna give u, U've got make one yourself. I’m not telling you need to be orators,
but you can use your pen. That’s equally good. You can research and learn Islam and spread the message
through your writings. Or debate intellectually with non-muslim females. Every day at least one book is
written against Islam. The brothers alone cannot do all the job of educating people bout Islam, the sisters
need to do their bit. When r u gonna put your brains to some "Real" good use? Wake up sisters!! Before it’s too
late. Seek knowledge, bcoz seeking knowledge is obligatory on every Muslim. Imam Bukhari reported that
A'isha (R.A.) said: "The best women are the women of ansar because their shyness did not stop them
from learning the deen.".
But.
Jaabir said, The Messenger of Allah (saw) said, "Do not seek knowledge in order to compete with the
knowledgeable, or to win arguments with the ignorant, or to show off in gatherings. Whoever does any of
that will be in Hell." It was reported by Ibn Maajah (ra), by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh and al-Bayhaqi.

After you've learnt something, it's your duty to educate the other sisters who haven't. We guyz aren't allowed
to catch strange girls & talk to them in the name of teaching them Islam; we can only clarify their doubts. So
who's gonna teach 'em?? Here’s a link to help you:
How Can a Woman Be a Da`iyah?
http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?pagename=IslamOnline-English-
Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503547308

Yvonne Ridley, the female reporter who was captured by the Taliban & who later reverted to Islam, says:
A careful reading of the Koran shows that just about everything that Western feminists fought for in the
1970s was available to Muslim women 1,400 years ago. Women in Islam are considered equal to men in
spirituality, education and worth, and a woman’s gift for childbirth and child-rearing is regarded as a
positive attribute.

You see, reverts are doing our job & we're losing our jobs to 'em. Allah doesn’t need us to do His job. He can
35
make even the devil do His job. If we don’t perform our tasks, He’ll replace us with someone better to do our
tasks & we’ll be kicked out of His troupe.

"The ideal Muslimah is proud of the great position that Islam has given her among humanity. She performs
her duties knowing that her role is clearly defined and that her rights are still, even today, greater than any
other ideology has provided. She is a woman of moral excellence, true to her nature, not confused by alien
and morally bankrupt ideas. She preserves her self-respect and dignity through her piety in obedience to
Allah (SWT) and His Messenger (PBUH). She is the role model that every true believer hopes to emulate. " -
Dr. Al-Hashmi. in his book- "the ideal Muslimah".

Zain Bhikha in his nasheed, "heart of a Muslim": living as a Muslim means that you must play a part. Allah
looks not at how you look, but what is in your heart.

I ask those Muslims who feel they have no duty towards Islam, "Would you follow a religion that has in its
books, pornography, women abuse, Incest, casteism, failing Gods, erring Gods, errors & mistakes,
contradictions, atrocities, Injustice, & many other discrepancies, & most importantly, which is written by a
man or men?" Nopes right. Then thank Allah that He didn’t make you anyone other than a Muslim because just
name any major religion in the world & you’ll find these in their books. I speak with proofs. Had u been born a
non-Muslim, there were more chances that u would die as a non-Muslim than u reverting to Islam & dying. If it
was not for Islam, we would be worshipping a Prophet (Jesus, Moses, etc (pbut)), a philosopher, Satan,
animals, & even fictional characters!! Says Ahmed Deedat : U & your family could be garlanding a "Lingam"
& a "Yoni". U knew a Lingam; that Shiva Lingam? That is a male phallus!!!! Had it not been for Islam, we
could be worshipping That!!!! If Islam did nothing but saved you from worshipping that, HOW ARE YOU
GONNA PAY ISLAM FOR THAT?!!!!! HOW?!!!!!

Do we still feel bored and have nothing to do??????

ISLAH
I found the following chat piece on another Islamic forum:

Absurd
Read this amazingly absurd conversation that this guy had with this lady.

fatima_islamuk: Hi
Wreek: salams
fatima_islamuk: Wasalaam
fatima_islamuk: How r u?
Wreek: Alhamdolilah I’m well. How about you?
fatima_islamuk: fine
Wreek: Fasting?
fatima_islamuk: yes
fatima_islamuk: and u?
Wreek: Done with aftaari, alhamdolilah
Wreek:
Wreek: I’m from pakistan.
fatima_islamuk: I’m from the UK
Wreek: oh naice. I figured.
Wreek: Have we talked before?
fatima_islamuk: Not sure
Wreek: lol, same here
Wreek: By the way, I’m 19.
Wreek: How abt you?
fatima_islamuk: I’m 41

36
Wreek: Ah wow. Huge age difference
fatima_islamuk: yes it is
Wreek: Where in the UK do you live?
fatima_islamuk: Leicester
Wreek: oh…I see
Wreek: Have you heard of Sheikh Mohammed Sindhi, then?
fatima_islamuk: No
Wreek: Am I bugging you?
fatima_islamuk: Not at all
Wreek: lol, oh ok. Great to know.
Wreek: Are you a revert?
fatima_islamuk: yes I am
Wreek: ah, Masha’Allah
Wreek: Your husband’s a …what? African, South Asian, Arab?
Wreek: You’re married, I presume?
fatima_islamuk: I am married but I am male.
fatima_islamuk: My husband’s a male too.
Wreek: Oh a male?
Wreek: and your name is Fatima?
fatima_islamuk: Yes, my adopted name since I reverted and became a niqaabi
Wreek: So you mean…
Wreek: that you’re a male
Wreek: but you’re trying to become a female?
Wreek: because in islaam, men aren’t really supposed to wear the Niqab. They can for fun’s sake but thats it.
fatima_islamuk: I am trying to live as a female
Wreek: Ah, I see. Quite interesting
Wreek: But a question pops up…why?

I’ve heard about Muslims trying to justify their gay/lesbian status but Muslims trying to justify their ‘adopted’
gender is totally alien. In this case, Mr. Fatima believes, for an unknown reason, that he will be better able to
function in this world as a Muslim, being a female. Even when God willed otherwise. But that is not a problem
for him because he has willed to openly deny his god-given gender and become a female. Or ‘trying to live as
one’ as he aptly puts it. Worst of all, he chose to be a Niqabi. The pope slandering the Holy Prophet (p.b.u.h),
the Denmark racist cartoon issue, the Jack Straw-veil issue and now finally this. Things just keep getting
better don’t they?

So who's gonna learn and explain the rules of Islam to these crazy Muslims? "Islah" means "to repair". Who's
gonna repair these Muslims? The non-Muslims?

But that’s not to say that the sisters should not observe Hijab. Niqab is not mandatory (though preferred), but
Hijab is, on every Muslim sister who's crossed adolescence. I was really hurt to see the plight of many of our
Muslim sisters when recently my cousin sis, who's newly entered college, meets me and says with pride and a
grin, "look bro I'm wearing tights (a kind of jeans pants)!!” Lahaulawalaquwwah! Did she expect me to pat her
back for that? She also ridicules my other cousins who are pious. This is again an important issue that requires
separate discussion for it. You can find many good videos on Hijab by great scholars like Dr. Zakir Naik. Do
watch. And also check out this article by Sara Bokker, a former actress- "Why I Shed Bikini for Niqab":
http://www.albalagh.net/women/0097.shtml

But here, my request to my Muslim brothers and sisters is, if you don't follow Hijab (may Allah guide you) at
least don't ridicule those who do.

Fatwaa from Shaikh AbdulAziz Bin Abdullah Bin Bazz (Rahimahullah) From his book 'Islamic Fatwas regarding
Women' Page #259

Whoever ridicules a Muslim woman or man for sticking to and applying the teachings of Islam is a disbeliever.
This is regardless of whether it is concerning woman's hijab or any other matter of the Shariah. This is based
on the following narration from ibn Umar: At a gathering during the Battle of Tabuk, one man said, "I have
not seen anyone like our Quranic readers who is more desirous of food, more lying in speech and more

37
cowardly when meeting the enemy." A man said, "You have lied and you are a liar. I shall definitely tell
the Messenger of Allah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) about that." That news was conveyed to the
Messenger of Allah and the Quran was revealed. Abdullah ibn Umar added, "I saw the man holding on to
the bag of the camel of the Messenger of Allah and the dust was striking him while he was saying, 'O
Messenger of Allah, we were just joking and playing. The Messenger of Allah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam)
was simply saying the verse of the Quran],
"Was it Allah, and His Signs and His Messenger you were mocking? Make no excuse, you have disbelieved
after you had believed. If We pardon some of you, We will punish others among you because they were
sinners" (al-Tauba 65-66). So ridiculing believers has been equated with ridiculing Allah, His Signs and His
Messenger.
“That shall be their recompense, Hell; because they disbelieved and took My Ayaat (proofs, evidences,
verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) and My Messengers by way of jest and mockery” [Quran, 18:106]

When we sweat out for gaining a few extra marks; slog to get into a premier institute; after getting in again
damage our heads with the greed to over perform; there we ridicule or mock at pious people to please the
sinners around us (which in turn boomerangs at us in the form of severe life-screwing problems); and then get
a handsome job which again requires us to work like an ass (all this at the cost of giving up our religious
obligations), where are we heading to? To a (so-called) success which ends with our death. But where are the
pious people whom we ridicule for our enjoyment and to prove ourselves superior, heading to? To an
everlasting success. Success that starts with death and never ends……
Well yes, the duty of a Muslim is to strive to be successful in both the worlds, but if the success of this world
comes at the cost of the success of the next, then it's better not to be “successful” here at all. I put that
successful in quotes in the previous sentence because success, if redefined, has been attained by all the pious
people in this world as well (in addition to the success in the next).

Just a few days back this company called DE Shaw came to our campus to recruit some “extraordinarily
intelligent” (as they put it in their presentation) candidates. Only high first-class candidates need to apply-
first condition. Second- It’s a knock-out recruitment process. More than 500 under-grads from all streams
went for it. Finally they chose only 4. Four out of 500 “high first class” students!!! Even I and my friends tried
but none of us got selected. We tried real hard but were out. So, to get into this company, one has to be
extraordinary and must try as hard as possible. And even then, his probability of selection is lesser than
1/100!! And even if you get selected they don’t guarantee you a life of bliss, leave alone everlasting. They
just pay you well. And moreover you’ve to work harder on the job, than you did for getting selected. I was
wondering, only for a job of 40 grand a month one has to try so damn hard and be extremely outstanding,
then how much hard should we try to get into Paradise, an everlasting life of bliss, and how much
extraordinarily strong in our faith should we be to get there??!

We give up doing Salah quoting the reason of studies, Lahaulawalaquwwah. We don't need to lessen our study
time. All we have to do is substitute our haraam enjoyments with Ibadah. Whose gonna go and teach this to
our fellow Muslims?
Inviting Non-Muslims to Islam is Da'wah. On the other hand, educating a Muslim on Islam or striving to make
him a better Muslim, is Islah. We need to learn more and more about Islamic jurisprudence and teach and
preach that in the light of Quran and Sahih Hadeeth. That is Islah, which is equally important as Da'wah.

You may check the following question & its reply on Islam-qa.com
What is the Islamic answer to the leisure problem?
Find the answer here: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=2267&ln=eng&txt=chatting

38
CHAPTER-4

QUESTIONS BY THE YOUNG MUSLIMS

1) "Bro, at our age, you yourself have been that way; how do you expect us to change?"
Good question!
Firstly, U need to get this straight- that by doing good & leaving bad, you are not doing a favor to me. So how
do "I expect" seems more like, my success depends on you. Sorry guyz, that’s not true. My job is just to
deliver the message. Whether you accept it or not I get the reward InshaAllah! My duty is not to convince you,
but just to convey.
". Say: ‘The signs are only with Allah, and I am only a plain warner.' " (29:50)
"Say: 'The knowledge of it is with AIIah only, I am only a plain warner.' " (67:26)
U r not doing a favor to Allah either. u will only be doing a favor to yourself. Your being good or bad doesn’t
make a difference to His powers. But it makes a big difference to your lives of both the worlds. So do it for
YOURSELF. A small example: suppose there’s a patient suffering from a deadly disease. The doctor asks him
to take a certain pill 5 times a day, else he’ll die. Suppose after a few days he becomes lazy and says, “I don
wanna eat. What will the doc lose if I stop taking these pills?” the doc will not lose anything, it’s you who’l
lose- your life. Similiarly, we praying to Allah & glorifying and spreading His message, is for our own good, not
His- Riaz Ansary.

Secondly, I would tell you, at your age I didn’t have any person coming to me & advising, warning, correcting
& guiding me in this matter or any other Islamic matter whatsoever. But you guyz get many elder brothers to
advise you on their own or at least direct u to specific book or videos of great scholars and orators like my
idol, Dr. Zakir Naik & give u quotations of Quran & Hadeeth. I didn’t know Dr. Zakir Naik till a year back. If I
had someone who would advise me or at least to whom I could ask my doubts, I would've changed or I might
not have changed. But my chances of changing would increase from 0% to 50%. At your age, I had 0%, u guyz
have 50%; that’s the difference. Yes, I should've sought knowledge myself, but at that age a person is so lost
in his worldly joys that he seldom thinks differently. Until someone comes & gives him a kick, he doesn't wake
up. I know that's a lame reason that I'm giving, but I'm trying to help you understand why you must change at
the current age & not wait till you're old & sagging. But wouldn’t it be better that a person would come to me
& help me realize my wrong when I was of your age? That way my sins would be of two years lesser period :-).
So, had I stopped the wrong that I was doing two years back, whatever good I would've done since then would
have, instead of annihilating the sins, added up on my "good deeds" side & hence this side would be heavier
than it is now. I hope I've put my point across. I'm still paying for my bad deeds. I doubt if Allah has forgiven
all the wrong that I've done. He alone knows that.

But again, this justification or any justification won’t be accepted for committing sins, by a person who's
matured, like u guyz & me. We can’t say "I didn't know". That’s because, First, Islam has clearly stated that a
Muslim needs to seek knowledge mandatorily; Second, in this age, knowledge (information) is available at just
the click of a button. Almost everyone of us knows to use the internet. You can find practically any
information you want to know, private as well as general. You can find Quran, Hadeeth, answers by scholars,
lectures, ebooks & what not. Any info u need is available to u in just a few seconds.
Consider this for instance- Suppose you are charged with ‘driving without a license’ by the cop. Can you say,
“sorry sir, I dint know the law? I dint know driving without license is a crime” ?, will the cop accept such an
answer? Nopes, cause it’s your duty to find out the law. Similarly, it’s your duty to find out the jurisprudence
in Islam. So the reason, "I didn't know" is not gonna work.

Changed Faces

Let's have a look at the lives of some reverts before and after their conversion to Islam. This would help us
assess if it's really hard for us to change for the better, no matter whatever our current lifestyles are.

39
Yusuf Islam (previously Cat Stevens)- Ex-rock star was known as The Lone Superstar during the 70’s; reverted
at the height of his fame

Kareem Abdul Jabbar (previously Lew Alcindor)- Considered one of the greatest players of all time

Muhammad Ali (previously Cassius Clay)- considered all time greatest boxer

40
Yusuf Estes (previously Skip Estes), Former Christian preacher and Federal Prison Chaplain

Preacher Moss is an American Muslim convert, comedian, and writer

41
Yvonne Ridley British journalist who was captured by the Taliban and who subsequently reverted to Islam,
says “the Koran is a magna carta for women”

Malcolm X (also known as El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz)- an influential American Black minister

Dr. Ingrid Mattson is a Canadian Muslim convert professor and activist and the current president of the
Islamic Society of North America (ISNA).

42
Junaid Jamshed (Not a revert, but a convert from a namesake Muslim to a practicing Muslim)- One of the
most popular former pop star of Pakistan.

So if these people above having such a great diversion from Islam, can revert to Islam or change into being
good practicing Muslims, why can’t we?

2) Can I have a Muslim girlfriend?

Aaargh!!! I am at my wits end!!! But. "Thou shalt not get angry". So I keep my cool.
The ruling that you read above applies in the case of making a Muslim GF/BF "ALSO". Do I need to say that?
Rasulullah S.A.W. said, "It is better for a man that a steel nail be driven through the center of his head
rather than if he touches the palm of a strange women."- Muhaddith al-Ruyaani, in his Musnad (Vol.2
Pg.323). This narration has been classified as Sahih (authentic) by Allamah ibn Hajr al-Haitami in his az-
Zawajir
"Strange women" here includes Muslims.

3) "I never approached her, she herself came to me."

Silly, I know but I couldn't turn this lad away, who asked me this, without a reply. I ask, Will you dare say the
same to Allah? Just think, will he accept such silly excuses? That way you’ll find hundreds who'l sleep with you
for nothing, so would you be washed off of the sin if you give in to them?
All these lads think like this, thanks to the ways of the kuffar according to whom anything done consensually
is acceptable. Acceptable only to them, not to Islam. We see lots of AIDS campaigners who encourage people
to use rubber to prevent AIDS. Even I was one of them long time back. Lets agree u prevent the disease by
using it, but can u prevent the sin that comes with it? Or is Man gonna invent another device to prevent even
the sin? ;-> We Muslims must campaign for AIDS prevention, yes. But not with the slogans of the kuffars, but
with Islamic slogans- "Avoid fornication and adultery, AIDS will get eliminated automatically". We cut the
problem from its roots, giving no chance for the problem to occur- thats Islam. So people, whether someone
agrees or not, you must enforce control on yourself. Do not give in to the seductions of Satan. If not it would
be like drinking Satan's pee.
Abu Hurayra said, "The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, 'There are
seven whom Allah will shade in His shade on the day on which there is no shade except His shade: . (one
among them is) a man who refuses the approaches of a noble, beautiful woman, saying "I fear Allah,"
[Bukhari]

4) She's wanting to revert, so we can marry now right?

Alhamdulillah, happy for her intention, but sad about you having a girl friend. I dunno where we all are
heading. Can't there be a single Muslim who's never had a GF/BF? Can't there be a single Muslim who's a
devout slave of Allah from the start? Everyone of us needs to have a bad history eh? And this guy, who's asking

43
me this question, is in 9th grade in school!!!! O Allah. Anyways, if she's reverting for your sake, then it’s of no
use whatsoever. She needs to revert after having discovered Islam & the one and only God, Allah. Her
reverting should be for Allah alone and not for you. If it's the former(for Allah) and you guys are serious about
each other, then marry InshaAllah after she reverts. But keep away from each other till marriage. And if she's
not reverting, or reverting for your sake alone, then keep away forever, i.e., cut off. In her reversion process,
seek the help of a learned Muslim Sister. You, as I said, need to keep away from her until she reverts &
ultimately marries you. Just refer her to an elder Muslim sister you know, who's strong in faith. I suggest you
ask a good Muslim Scholar regarding this issue before taking any step. May Allah guide all of us in the straight
path. Aameen.

5) I did da'wah but she didn’t budge. But I love her very much, losing her is like losing life.

Lemme repeat the sentence he said "Losing her is like losing life". 'So we must live not to worship Allah, but
for a person you love; so if that person isn't there in your life, life's no meaning at all'- Isn't that sentence of
that gentleman imply this? thus nullifying the following verse of the Quran:
I created the jinn and humankind only that they might worship me. (Qur'an, 51:56)

Look brother, I was also in exactly the same position (or maybe more difficult situation) as you. Allah knows
best. It wasn’t easy at all for me. It took a long time & continuous efforts. So its not gonna be easy for you
too. But I sought Allah’s help and he helped me strive. I urge u to do the same.

You should also remember that whoever gives up something for the sake of Allah, Allah will compensate him
with something better than it, so hasten to repent sincerely and give up these haraam things, and keep
yourself busy with things that will benefit your spiritual and worldly interests.

The following is an extract from the book "Romanticism: A weapon of Satan" by Harun Yahya.

One of the most common forms of sentimentality in society today is the notion of romantic love. This
sentiment is experienced differently by
different people, and is found from family relations, to relations of friendship and camaraderie; but it is most
usually found in the relationship between a man and a woman.

Some people set up equals to God, loving them as they should love God. But those who believe have
greater love for God. If only you could see those who do wrong at the time when they see the
punishment, and that truly all strength belongs to God, and that God is severe in punishment. (Qur'an,
2:165)

Idolatrous Love Between Men and Women

The kind of romantic love that leads to idolatry has become acceptable in society as completely "innocent," as
"mere romance" and as "true feelings;" it is even praised and encouraged. Usually, it is at a young age that
people fall under the influence of romanticism, which prevents the development of their minds and
conscience, keeping them ignorant of religion, faith and the purpose of creation. They have forgotten God,
and know nothing about loving or fearing Him.

In this romantic understanding of love, the "lovers" show to each other all the duties that should be directed
toward God, and they show to each other those feelings that should be reserved for God, as if they had an
existence apart from Him. These individuals, instead of keeping God in mind, think only of each other. When
they first open their eyes in the morning, instead of thanking their Creator for the new day, they think of
each other, seeking to please only each other, not to please God. They are willing to sacrifice themselves for
each other, but not for God.

In short, each turns the other into god. Likewise, when we consider various examples of this warped
understanding of love, as has become so widespread in the world, we will find that romantic men and women
will openly declare to each other, "I worship you," "Wherever I go, I think about you," and other such
expressions. However, wherever one looks, and wherever one goes, the only Being who deserves to be adored
44
is God, the Lord of the Universe.

As we have been examining, romantic love appears to be an innocent kind of love, though it is a type of
"idolatry," reprehensible in the sight of God. However, Satan blinds people to the truth, and so, in this case,
he has again warped the truth to make it seem pleasant, and to make people follow the way he shows them:

By God, We sent Messengers to communities before your time, but Satan made their actions seem good to
them. Therefore today he is their protector. They will have a painful punishment. (Qur'an, 16:63)
Satan made their actions seem good to them and so debarred them from the Way, even though they had
been granted insight. (Qur'an, 29:38)

For example, two young people in love with each other may be deluded to the point of taking pleasure in the
idea of committing suicide. However, in committing such an act, they are not aware that they are actually
throwing themselves directly into the jaws of hell. This they will realize when they see the Angel of Death, at
their final moment, but it will be too late. These are clear examples of how romanticism can completely shut
up a person's mind and conscience.

However, when the blindfold is removed, and a person sees that the promise of eternal torment is real, he
will finally try to save himself by offering as ransom that partner to whom he had blindly devoted himself, and
turned into a god under the influence of romanticism. What these people will ultimately do is described in a
verse of the Qur'an as follows:

Even though they can see each other. An evildoer will wish he could ransom himself from the punishment
of that Day, by means of his sons, or his wife or his brother or his family who sheltered him or everyone
else on earth, if that only meant that he could save himself. (Qur'an, 70:11-14)

6) "I tried to forget her but her memories haunt me", "I try to keep away from her, but I can't", 'The more
I run away from her, the more i think of her"

Lemme empathize with you in this. I really understand because I can put myself in your shoes. Lemme give
you my own example. Almost everyday, accidentally I meet eyes with my ex bcoz she'z in the same college as
me. In fact, in my neighboring class. Shouldn’t I have more difficulty in forgetting her? Whenever I see her
now, my heart beats faster, Satan tries to act as my pal & tries to convince me to get her back in my life. At
times I even get lost thinking about it until my friend shakes me. Now this is a challenge, a big challenge of
faith. Now c'mon what kind of Allah's noble slave are you if you don't take up challenges ;-) So I immediately
start doing Zikr and bring the purpose of creation to my mind. I start visualizing my aims; the aims that I've
set for myself in this world to secure a good place in the next. This helps me to ward off Satanic thoughts like
getting back to her or making another girlfriend, etc. It’s gonna be difficult I agree, but have a strong will,
make constant Dua, surrender yourself to Allah, He'll take care of everything Insha Allah.

{[(So those who haven't been tested this way by Allah, u r very lucky. Just keep away!!!!!!!!!!! keep away from
these pre-marital affairs. It'l really tear u apart later on. Trust me bothers and sisters, it's really gonna be
difficult if u fall for it. Difficult to come out. So please bid adieu to all those "sweet" & "sexy" & "cute" friends
of the opposite sex u have, lest u might also have a hard time. So to all those "singles"- u r very lucky. Hence,
maintain that status till your marriage or pay the price. & believe me, the price is really really hefty.)]}

When one changes for the better, one faces lots of difficulties; difficulties starting right from the family to
your friends and society. That again is a test. This test is like a GMAT test. You know in GMAT test, every
individual has different set of questions distributed among various levels. If you perform well in your first
level, then your second level's questions will get tougher with more marks. If you perform poorly, then your
questions in the next level become easier with lesser marks. So the better you perform, the tougher your
questions get and the more marks you get and vice versa. Similarly, when you get more religious and start
replacing bad with good, you find it difficult. For instance, you start growing a beard, and everyone around
you have problems. You stop watching movies, people think you're weird. You keep up with all the Salah and
people say you're old. So difficulties will be there initially, but remember, the more difficult problems you
tackle, the more marks you get. You might be getting 99.5 percentile in the competitive exams, but how
45
much is your percentile in the tests of Allah?  Judge for yourself how strong a Muslim you are. Try and
become a cool dude in the eyes of Allah 

The height of self-control is manifested in those people who are in touch with themselves to the extent that
even a fleeting thought of transgression is sufficient enough as a warning for them and they exercise patience
and self-control from seeking to satisfy their lower desires in an impermissible manner. Allaah Most High
reminds us that they are
“Those who show patience, firmness and self-control; who are true (in word and deed); who worship
devoutly; who spend (in the way of Allaah) and who pray for forgiveness in the early hours of the
morning.” (Aali-‘Imraan 3:17)

[Romanticism: A weapon of Satan]

It is true that God may test a person in this world with certain difficulties and worries. However, the believer
does not give in to melancholy and pessimism when he is faced with such anxieties; he does not react
emotionally. He knows that God is trying him to see how he will behave in difficulty, and that the solution is
not to turn to weeping or sorrowful regret. The solution lies in seeking help from God, "Who responds to the
oppressed when they call on Him and removes their distress" (Qur'an, 27:62), relying only on Him, and in
being certain that God will hear his prayers and grant his requests.
This is the promise of God to His servants:
Yes, the friends of God will feel no fear and will know no sorrow: those who believe and have done their
duty, there is good news for them in the life of the world and in the hereafter. There is no changing the
words of God. That is the great victory! (Qur'an, 10:62-64)

Melancholy, excessive sadness and pessimism, are inherent aspects

of the romantic love-affair. To each person in such a relationship,
the other means the whole world. They can spend hours thinking
about what the other said, or the meaning of the expression on his or
her face. This can produce an irrationally melancholic state of mind.

7) This is from a sister. "My guy’s so strong in his faith and so religious. He doesn't even look at girls. I
love him only because of his piety. So that must be a valid love."

Ahem! There's a new problem here, young sisters having a crush on religious guys. So Satan, the deceitful
scoundrel is up with a new trick to misguide pious people. (This is not to mean falling in love is from Satan, as
one brother misunderstood me here)
A similar question of a sister that I found on Islam-qa.com is:

Question:
Praise be to Allaah, I am a religiously-committed young woman and I go on the Internet a great deal to post
lessons and discussions. Recently I became a moderator in a chat room for Islamic teachings. Frankly I am very
impressed by the character of the Webmaster of this site, because he is religiously committed and educated,
and he honours his parents. Is it permissible for me to give charity on his behalf and pray for him even though
46
I know very little about him?
Another question is: It is permissible for a young woman to love a person because he is Muslim, religiously
committed and educated? Is this regarded as love for the sake of Allaah?
Is it permissible for me to take his number and call him to ask after his family and him, or to talk to him about
some issues having to do with the site?.

A part of the reply is:

The shaytaan deceives people and opens the way that leads them to sin. He mixes things that are acceptable
with things that are not acceptable, and mixes truth with falsehood. He comes to each person through
something that is suited to him. So a woman who likes music will be attracted to singers; as for the woman
who loves Islam and is religiously committed, there are men who love that too. There is a trick for everything.

A wise man said: I do not know of any truth that resembles falsehood or any falsehood that resembles truth
more than love. Jokes concerning it are serious, serious talk concerning it is a joke. It starts as a game and
ends in ruin.

For full answer visit this webpage: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=92824&ln=eng&txt=webmaster

8) Another young brother- "I do no wrong but still when I make dua, hardly my duas are accepted. Seldom
do I get what I wished."

If Allah had given everything that we wished in this world, then His role would be limited only to granting our
wishes and not moderating our lives. We would've no test at all. It’s like going to school but not willing to
write the exams at all. How will you pass? Our life is full of tests. One of the major tests is, the test of
patience and gratitude.
Allah knows best (obviously better than us) as to what's good & what's bad for us.
".but it may happen that ye hate a thing which is good for you, and it may happen that ye love a thing
which is bad for you. Allah knoweth, ye know not." [Quran, 2:216]

I copied this from a fellow blogger’s page:

Have faith
A man and woman met for the first time on their wedding night. The man saw his wife for the
first time and turned his face away. She asked him does my appearance displease you. To this
he did not respond and just stayed quiet. She then asked did you not ask your Lord for
guidance in this matter. He said that he made Istikhara. To this she replied then do you not
trust in His decision.
It was from the union of these people that Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal was born.
The above post emphasizes that our dreams and desires are not the final word. Sometimes we want something
that is not best for us. Only Allah alone knows. So ask for His a’afiyat and then make shukr on whatever He
grants. Insha’Allah, you would never regret.

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Chapter-5

"ROMANTICISM- A WEAPON OF SATAN"- HARUN YAHYA

This chapter is mostly parts of the book "Romanticism- A weapon of Satan" by Harun Yahya.

There is a subtle danger that leads people away from religion, prevents them from submitting to God as their
Lord, and ultimately brings numerous other forms of trouble and distress upon them. This danger can be
recognised in many different areas of our lives: the clenched fist of a fascist, the rousing anthem of a
communist, or in the words of a letter written by a young man expressing his love to his loved one. All arise
from the same pernicious source.

The most disturbing aspect of this danger is that an overwhelming number of people do not see it as a danger
at all, nor do they realise either that it is actually a state of mind completely inimical to religion. In fact,
many view it, not as a dangerous error, but rather as a virtue to be encouraged and widely propagated. This
danger of which we are speaking is sentimentality that leads people to live, not according to their reason,
but according to their emotions; that is, according to their desires, hatreds, their susceptibility to
temptation, and their stubbornness.

LEGITIMATE AND ILLEGITIMATE LOVE

Sentimentalism, or in other words, romantic longing, makes itself known most often under the guise of
"love." we may consider a young man in
love with a girl which he turns into the sole focus of his life: what leads him to write her poetry saying "I love
you," and to become obsessed with her to the point of suicide, and, in fact, to "divinise" her, is the notion of
"love." Then, there are homosexuals, those who fall under God's interdiction, and shamelessly and insistently
practise their perversion; they too claim to have found "love."
48
As for the majority of people, they think that every emotion to which the name of "love" is ascribed is
virtuous, pure, and even holy, and that examples of romantic longing, such as what we have mentioned
above, are perfectly acceptable.

Have you seen him who takes his whims and desires to be his
god whom God has misguided knowingly, sealing up his hearing
and his heart and placing a blindfold over his eyes? Who then
will guide him after God? So will you not pay heed? (Quran,
45:23)

49
50
Love is indeed a wonderful emotion, accorded to humanity by God, but it is important to distinguish whether
that love is real or not, and to consider who it is directed to, and what sentiments it is founded on. Such
investigation should make apparent the difference between a sentimentalism that leads to perverse love, and
real love, as revealed to us by God in the Qu'ran.
The only being who deserves absolute love is God, who created us all. God brought us into existence,
proffered us with the countless blessings we enjoy, showed us the way, and promised us everlasting paradise.
He helps us out of every anxiety and graciously hears our every call. It is He who feeds us until we are
satisfied, cures us when we are ill and then restores our spirit. Therefore, he who understands the mysteries
of the universe loves God above all, and loves whom God loves, that is, those devout individuals who conform
to His will.
On the other hand, those transgressors who rebel against God, their Lord, are not worthy of love.

Some people set up equals to God, loving them as they should love God. But those who believe have
greater love for God. If only you could see those who do wrong at the time when they see the
punishment, and that truly all strength belongs to God, and that God is severe in punishment. (Qur'an,
2:165)

In the Qur'an, God, in His great wisdom, teaches us a matter that is very important to understand. Emotions
must not guide a person's behaviour, because they can lead into grave error. A person must act, not according
to his emotions, but according to his reason, his freewill, and the commands of God. Moreover, he must train
his emotions to conform to his reason and will.

We can recognise this need in all who has fallen into the quagmire of sentimentality. Hundreds of millions of
people are enslaved to the desires of their hearts, their ambition, passion, hatred and anger. They do things
irrationally, and justify their acts by claiming helplessness, saying for example, "I can't help it. I just like it."
or "I can't help it. I want it. I feel like it." But, the fact that a person "feels like" something does not mean that
the thing is good or legitimate. Our inner-self is always urging us to do wrong, with Satan instigating us to
commit even greater wrongs. When someone acts contrary to the will of God, and says, "I can't help it. I feel
like it," his inner-self is actually acting as the tool of Satan. In the Qu'ran, God refers to such people in the
following manner:

Whenever they commit an indecent act, they say, "We found our fathers doing it and God commanded us
to do it too." Say: "God does not command indecency. Do you say things about God you do not know?"
(Qur'an, 7:28)

"YO MATE! THIS IS THE 21st CENTURY- RELIGION IS OUTDATED"

I hear a guy saying the above line. We youngsters think that we're too smart. Everyone is a Sheikh these dayz
giving his own ruling on the fixed laws of Islam. Like we've few young Muslims saying, "C'mon yaar, those laws
aren't relevant in this era." I ask, Are you smarter than your creator? Allah has prescribed Quran for the whole
of humanity till the day of judgment; it is time-proof. As i told earlier, the purpose of some laws of Allah we
can understand and some we cannot. If we don’t find any law logical or do not understand why it is so, it’s
51
OUR ignorance. I gave the example of opening fast with dates, earlier. There are tens of hundreds of other
examples. So till now people were following the Quran and Hadeeth without knowing its worldly benefits only
to gain sawaab. Alhamdulillah. But Allah, has kept an underlying benefit in everything He commands us to do,
both, in this world and the hereafter. So we must not try to act smarter than we actually are, and shut our
gobs and follow it.

Watch lecture: Islam And Youth by the Dynamic and funny Sheikh, Yusuf Estes
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8227136883514844087

The following is a part of the chapter "THE TRUE WISDOM THAT COMES FROM FAITH" of the same book of
Harun Yahya.

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN INTELLIGENCE AND WISDOM

The important difference between a wise person and an intelligent person is often missed. This is a critical
error. The word "intelligence" is generally used in our society to refer to the quality of mere mental acuity,
and is very different from wisdom. Wisdom is the quality of a believer who has the ability to recognise the
subtle signs of God in everything that He has created, allowing him to understand the world around him. But,
any attempt to consider these things, that relies only on the brain's ability to calculate cause and effect, is
bound to end in a mechanistic and narrow perception of reality. Intelligence is a quality of a believer who has
a firm faith in God, and who lives his life in accordance with the teaching found in the verses of the Qu'ran.
Intelligence is a physical characteristic possessed by all individuals in varying degrees, but wisdom is a quality
that belongs only to believers. Those who do not have faith also are not possessed of the "virtue" of wisdom.
Wisdom allows a believer to properly employ his mental abilities, judgement, and logic, thus making the best
use of his virtues.

An individual without wisdom, no matter how intelligent he may be, is bound at some point to veer into
faulty thinking or into bad judgement. If we examine unbelieving philosophers throughout the course of
history, we will recognise that they have put forward different and sometimes even diametrically opposed
views on the very same subject. Despite the fact that they were people of high intelligence, they had no
faith; and because they had no faith, they also were not sufficiently wise and were therefore incapable of
arriving at the truth. Some of them, indeed, drew humanity into numberless errors. We can find several such
examples in recent history: Many philosophers, ideologues, and statesmen, such as Marx, Engels, Lenin,
Trotsky, despite the fact that they were very intelligent, caused disaster to fall upon millions of people,
because they were unable to use their minds effectively. Wisdom, however, assures peace, well-being, and
happiness, and shows the way to attain them.

Intelligence makes it possible for us, among other things, to think,

form perceptions, focus our attention, and engage in practical
activities. But, in addition to all these, a wise person also possesses a
deep understanding unattainable by mere intelligence, and by means
of which he is able to distinguish between truth and falsehood.
Therefore, a wise person possesses insight far superior to that of
an intelligent person. The source of wisdom, as we said before, is a
deep-seated faith and fear of God. Those who fear God, heed His
commandments and proscriptions, become naturally possessed of this
superior insight as a blessing from God. But, though this virtue is
easily acquired, very few are endowed of wisdom. This condition, that
God makes known in the Qu'ran, saying, "Most of them do not use
their reason." (Qur'an, 5:103), arises from the fact that most people
do not have the proper faith, having left no room for the Qu'ran in
their lives.

52
In addition, wisdom makes it possible for the believer to adapt himself easily to changing conditions and
situations. The keenness of the believers' insight and understanding, their attentiveness and awareness, their
superior analytical ability, good morals, strong character, and their wisdom in word and action, are all natural
products of their wisdom. (for detailed information see True Wisdom According to the Qur'an by Harun Yahya)

"NO ONE CARES FOR ME, I'M THE MOST DEPRESSED, WHY HAVE I SO MANY
SORROWS? SOB!"

Say: “Nothing will happen to us except what Allah has decreed for us: He is our protector”: and in Allah
must Believers place their trust. [Quran, 9:51]
[Lessons from this Verse] Whatever tests you are going through today, Allah knows it. He is your protector.
Turn to Allah in submission and worship, placing your trust in Him, and watch what happens!

Everybody thinks that they have the most problems in life, which keep recurring & never take a break. This
is the problem mostly with the sisters as per my experience.
There is this Muslim sister who tells that her life sucks, she gets blamed for everything, she gets blasted
everytime, she doesn wanna live, etc. You sympathize & empathize but it happens all the time with her that
u wonder, why is Allah not giving her the patience and strength to go through all the tests of life? But then,
why should He? This is the same girl who seldom performs her salah, seldom reads the Quran, seldom makes
dua though u tell her a hundred times; who is very punctual- in watching movies. I doubt if she does her bit
for Islam when she's not even performing her basic duties. On a Friday we'd to discuss something but she
called a li’l later giving the reason that she reached home late as she was chatting wid her friends & didn’t
realize how the time went. I asked her, "today's Jum'aa; didn’t you perform your Jum'aa Salah?" She says,
"Ahm no"
Does anyone else smell judgment day here?

Allah (swt) tells us that the people of Paradise will ask the people of Hell:

"What led you into Hellfire?" (74:42)

They will reply: ".We were not of those who prayed, Nor were we of those who fed the indigent, But we
used to talk vanities with vain talkers, And we used to deny the Day of Judgement, Until there came to us
[the Hour] that is certain." (74:43-47)

Common Sentimentality
We have defined sentimentality as one's acting upon not in accordance to the truths acquired by wisdom and
reason, but in accordance to one's emotions. Sentimentality is a spiritual disease latent in every member of
atheistic or pagan societies, though it generally tends to affect people differently; some people being more
emotional than others. It is not possible for one who has no interest in the Qu'ran, or who does not live by the
religion, to save himself from the grip of romanticism. Sentimentality can only be eradicated by acting wisely,
that is, by acting according to the moral teachings of the Qu'ran.

53
Sentimentality has been one of the main reasons for the complaints voiced by many people relative to many
issues for which they are at a loss to find a solution. However, because the solution to every problem, and the
way out of every difficulty, is presented in the Qu'ran, those individuals or societies that use it as their guide
have all the advantages that wisdom affords. In other words, they come to live the benefits of wisdom:

A Light has come to you from God and a Clear Book. By it, God guides those who follow what pleases Him
to the ways of peace. He will bring them from the darkness to the light by His permission, and guide them
to a straight path. (Qur'an, 5:15-16)

God guides those who follow what pleases Him to the ways of peace. He will bring them from the
darkness to the light by His permission, and guide them to a straight path. (Qur'an, 5:15-16)

54
Now, it is necessary to point out the difference between being sensitive and empathetic and being
emotional. In the Qu'ran, God makes it clear that to be "sensitive, empathetic and gentle" are qualities best
exhibited in a prophet. Sentimentality is the exact opposite of the moral attitude that is recommended in the
Qu'ran. Believers are not sentimental, but are empathetic and humane. In other words, they are sober
individuals, of superior wisdom, who possess very strong moral qualities. In the Qu'ran, God speaks about the
good moral character of the prophet Ibrahim: "Ibrahim was forbearing, compassionate, penitent." (Qur'an,
11:75)

Sentimentality robs a person of his sense of reality. One of the most telling signs of an emotional personality
is his desire to live in a world divorced from
reality; he is like one who lives in a dream world, with only a tenuous connection to reality. Instead of reason
and logic, he chooses emotion; and instead of reality, he chooses dreams and fantasies. Therefore, it is
impossible to engage in conversation or discourse with him; he can neither offer nor take any guidance or
advice. In actuality, sentimentality is a mild form of the mental disorder that psychiatrists call
"schizophrenia." (People who suffer from schizophrenia are cut off from reality and live in their own world)

55
 For example, news comes that a relative has had an
accident; instead of thinking that there must be a
good in it anyway, and determining how he may be of
some use and offering his assistance, an emotional
person will usually become faint and start to cry. He
will not ask what has been done for the victim, if the
doctor has been called or if there is enough medicine.
He will not try to find out what he can do to help, but
will seek to be consoled himself as if he were the one
in need of support.

If you wished to inform someone of the danger that

sentimentality poses to his spiritual life, he would not
listen to you; from the outset he would refuse to
consider even such a possibility. The mind of an
emotional person is so closed to any contrary
suggestion that he would immediately feel unjustly
treated and, either feel offended and begin to cry, or
get angry and withdraw into himself. So, you cannot
criticise an emotional person, much less offer him
suggestions or advice.

Emotionalism causes people to become easily offended. As a

result, these people fear that there is a hidden meaning in
everything that is said to them;
they easily misinterpret or exaggerate. Then, in protest and
without any explanation, they stop talking, withdraw and pout
like a child. Because they are either incapable of thinking
rationally, or are afraid to face reality, it is impossible for
them to self-criticise themselves, or improve on their
mistakes.
God speaks in the Qu'ran of the kind of person who chooses
unhappiness for himself: He who has fear will be reminded;
but the most miserable will shun it. (Qur'an, 87:10-11)

Another essential reason for the unhappiness felt by those

without faith is the fact that their plans do not turn out as
they expect. The defeat of a favorite football team, getting
a few points less than expected in an examination, being late
for work, a traffic jam, breaking a pair of glasses, losing a
watch, getting a stain on a favorite suit or dress at a party,
not being praised by one's husband- everything can become an
excuse for being unhappy.

A person who assesses a situation superficially and reacts

emotionally to it cannot foresee how, if something were to
happen to him, that it might in a later stage turn out
beneficially for him. For example: not getting the job he
really wanted is an occasion for an ignorant person, to feel
unlucky and dejected. Such a person regards getting the job
as definitely the best thing for him, and not getting it as his
greatest loss, whereas, a person who has faith that God is his
friend and protector will know that God approved the result
for his good, and he will submit to it with pleasure and
satisfaction. Perhaps the work environment would have
56
damaged his health; perhaps it was necessary for him not to take that job because a greater opportunity was
about to come to him.

People call it misfortune when something happens against their wishes, whereas it is best for the event to
happen in this particular way because it was determined by fate. If God were to show them the reason behind
what they call misfortune, and for which they feel frustrated, and the benefit that ultimately comes from the
things that
otherwise upset them and make them anxious or angry, they would understand just how misguided they were
in being sad, and their feelings would turn to joy and delight.

Similarly, those who live in the world neglectfully, wasting their lives without any attention to the
commandments of God, or to His proscriptions, will, in the hereafter, face their unhappiness: They will say,
"Our Lord, our misery has overwhelmed us. We were misguided people." (Qur'an, 23:106)

PHYSICAL ILLS CAUSED BY ROMANTICISM

As romanticism causes mental and spiritual damage, so too does it cause physical deterioration. Most
important are those apparent physical changes that a person is unable to hide. It is natural that if one
experiences mental distress, tension and worry, these are bound to be reflected in his outward appearance.
An emotional person's facial expressions, hand movements and tone of voice, all reveal the fact that his or her
personality is governed by sentimentality.

In emotional people, we may recognize the physical traits that a

"psychosomatic," or mental illness, can give rise to. When their
bodies lose their physical resilience, they become weak, their
immune system collapses and they either fall into one illness after
another or an existing illness lingers without getting better. Along
with this sickness come many other changes: a person may lose his
hair, or it may become prematurely gray and appear lifeless; the
skin loses its moisture and elasticity and becomes dry, thickened,
wrinkled and cracked, with the result that it becomes prone to
infections. Moreover, because the cells are slow to regenerate, the
person appears to have a permanent skin condition; his complexion
is sallow and his eyes are dull. Therefore, it is evident that people
with a tendency towards romantic melancholy, who continually
create problems for themselves, become old early. Their bodies
cannot stand the years of unrelenting tension, emotional flare-ups
and mental unrest. As a consequence, they display signs of early
ageing and other forms of serious physical deterioration. This is not
the last of the physical damage that sentimentality can inflict on a
person. His inner soberness and melancholy are reflected on his
face and in his behavior; all his dynamism, spirit, zest for life and
love are seriously diminished and, consequently, so is his physical
health. Because of the dullness of his eyes, the thinning and
lifelessness of his hair, and the tension in his facial muscles, his
expression is tense, gloomy and unpleasant. These are just a few of
the physical changes that might take place. By the same token,
people who are joyous, calm and composed, live much longer lives compared to those who are tense, stressed
and prone to tears, and it is a scientifically proven fact that they are healthier.

57
 Moreover, confronted with
these physical changes, they
make the nightmare they are
living worse, instead of
thinking about the transience
of the world, their own
helplessness within it, and
submitting in faith to God.
Because they do not consider
the good that may come to
them from growing old and its
effects, they are despairing
and beset by continual
anxiety. Caught in this vicious
circle, they are fixed in a
burden that they are
physically unable to
eradicate. In fact, doctors
have indicated that a number
of illnesses are caused by
sadness, worry and stress, and
that the only cure is in finding
joy and becoming more
optimistic. It has been
determined that a number of
conditions-sleep and eating
disorders, high or low blood-pressure, stomach, kidney and heart problems, asthma, allergies, eczema,
psoriasis, migraines, cancer and many illnesses-have psychological origins connected to stress and depression.

Stress and depression-related

conditions, such as memory loss,
attention deficit, lack of clear
judgment and thinking, nervous
twitches and uncontrollable
behavior, are recognizable in
those people who have no
faith, whereas believers are
spiritually and mentally sound
and well-balanced. This is
because, true peace of mind
and lasting joy come only from submitting to God and putting one's self in His hands.

The feeling of melancholy that romanticism instills in people is a terrible ailment that can only be removed by
the submission and joy that faith brings. Believers, on their way to Paradise, will offer praise to God in these
words:
They will say, "Praise be to God who has removed all sadness from us. Truly our Lord is Ever-Forgiving,
Ever-Thankful." (Qur'an, 35:34)
God does not wrong people in any way; rather it is people who wrong themselves. (Qur'an, 10:44)

However, sentimental people cannot grasp this reality, because they are continually in a melancholic and
despairing state of mind. No matter what happens, they will always find a reason to feel sad and anxious.
Actually, these people wrong themselves. This fact is revealed in the Qur'an as follows:

When We give people a taste of mercy, they rejoice in it, but when something bad happens to them
because of what they themselves have done, they immediately lose all hope. (Quran, 30:36)

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CHAPTER-6

"I LOVE HER. " SAID THE PROPHET (S.A.W) referring to His wife
Aisha (R.A.A)

For those of you who think marriage is the end of all fun and romance, here are some instances from the life
of our Prophet (s.a.w), some of which have been taken from the lecture "Was the Prophet Romantic?" by
Sheikh Waleed Basouni.

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We think about Romeo-Juliet, Laila-Majnu as great idols of love. But these are clearly idols of illicit love. They
make people believe that love is meant to exist only between non-married couples. For each and everything
in our life we need to refer to our Prophet (s.a.w) and his ways as Allah says, "Verily in the Messenger of
Allah ye have a good example." (Quran 33:21). Here we’ll take a look at some of the romantic instances of
his married life and about the importance he attached in giving wives their due rights.

Prophet (s.a.w) called on Yahya who used to fast excessively and said: It suffices for you that you should
observe fast for three days during every mouth. Yahya said: Apostle of Allah, I am capable of doing more
than this. He said: Your wife has a right upon you, your visitor has a right upon you, your body has a right
upon you;. [Muslim]
Before we proceed further let us silence the critics who question the intention of the Prophet (s.a.w) in
having many wives.
When people hear that the prophet had many wives they conclude without much thought that the prophet
was a sensuous man. However, a quick historical review of his marriages, proves otherwise. Ayesha (R.A.A)
was the only virgin amongst His wives. All other wives were either widows or divorcees.
When he was twenty-five years old he married for the first time. His wife, Khadijah, was fifteen years older
than he. She remained the only wife of the prophet for the next twenty-five years, until she died (may Allah
be pleased with her).
Only after her death, did the prophet marry other women. Now, it is obvious that if the prophet was after
physical pleasure he did not have to wait until he was more than fifty years old to start marrying more wives.
He lived in a society in which it was quite acceptable to have many wives. But the prophet remained devoted
to his only wife for twenty-five years. When she died she was sixty-five years old.
Here we have a non-Muslims doing the talking, Alhamdulillah! :
John L. Esposito, Professor of Religion and Director of the Center for International Studies at the College of
the Holy Cross, says that most of these marriages had "political and social motives" (Islam: The Straight Path,
Oxford University Press, 1988, p. 19). This he explained as follows: "As was customary for Arab chiefs, many
were political marriages to cement alliances. Others were marriages to the widows of his companions who had
fallen in combat and were in need of protection" (John L. Esposito, Islam: The Straight Path, pp. 19-20).
Esposito reminds us of the following historical fact: "Though less common, polygyny was also permitted in
biblical and even in post biblical Judaism. From Abraham, David, and Solomon down to the reformation
period, polygyny was practiced" (p. 19).

"But do you mean to tell me that the man who in the full flush of youthful vigour, a young man of four and
twenty (24), married a woman much his senior, and remained faithful to her for six and twenty years (26),
at fifty years of age when the passions are dying married for lust and sexual passion? Not thus are men's
lives to be judged. And you look at the women whom he married, you will find that by every one of them an
alliance was made for his people, or something was gained for his followers, or the woman was in sore need
of protection." (Dr. Annie Besant in 'The Life and Teachings of Mohammad,' Madras, 1932)

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Now lets get back to the topic of the chapter- "Was the Prophet romantic?"
Instead of quoting the whole hadiths which are very lengthy I've summarized them in brief in points so that it
can be read in a lesser time. Most of them are from the lecture mentioned above and some from the mail of a
Muslim Sister. The sources are
Muslim, Bukhari, Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Abu Nu‘aym.

The Prophet (s.a.w) said, "The best possession a man could have in his home amongst all the good things in
this world is a good (righteous & pious) wife". He also said, When a Muslim marries, half his/her faith is
complete, because marriage prevents a person from committing some of the most major sins.

Amongst the three circumstances that a person is allowed to lie, one is- A man can lie to his wife (only) to
make her happy. For ex: he can praise her beauty even if he doesn't find her beautiful. How's that! God,
you're great. :-> But he can lie in any other matters to her. And it's not allowed for any Muslim to say, "I'm not
gonna marry"; marriage is obligatory on everybody.

The prophet (s.a.w) was once asked whom do you love the most amongst the people of this world. He
answered: My wives

Here are some instances of his life.

1. He used to lie down with his head on Aisha's (RAA) thighs, and would recite the Quraan in this position even
when she would be having her period.

2. After Asr prayer he would visit all his wives. They would talk about past events and daily things and he
would listen. Sometimes he would tell them about some past events from his life. Aisha (R.A.A) says that he
would sit among his wives and talk and laugh and it would not seem that he is a mighty messenger of Allah.
but when the time for prayer would come, he would stop everything else.

3. He would invite the girls of the Ansaar to come to his house and play with Aisha (R.A.A). Sometimes he
would join them in their play.

4. When Aisha (R.A.A) would drink water from a cup, he would place his lips at the same place where she had
placed her lips, and drink water.
When she would eat meat off of a bone, he would place his mouth at the same place and eat.

5. Once he challenged Aisha (R.A.A) to a sprint. She beat him as she was young and agile. A few years later he
challenged her again and this time he beat her as she had put on some weight. The prophet said "You beat me
the first time. Today I have taken my revenge " :-)

6. He never shouted at his wives. If he did not like something he just would not talk to them.

7. Aisha (R.A.A) says that he would always enter the house smiling.

Now this, is my favorite:

8. Aisha (r.a.a) didn't know how to cook. But the Prophet(s.a.w) never rebuked her. She says, " I brought
harara to the prophet one day. Sauda (r.a.a) (His other wife) was also there. I asked her to eat it too. (But
you know, when a person who doesn't know to cook, cooks, how the food might taste.:-> lol) She refused. I
said, 'Either you eat it or I will smear it on your face.' She refused to eat. So I dipped my hand in the harara
and smeared it all over her face. When the Prophet (S.A.W) saw this he started to laugh. Then he pinned me
down with his hands, and asked Sauda (r.a.a) to smear my face with harara. She did that, and the Prophet
(S.A.W) started to laugh again."

9. Aisha (R.A.A) says that once she cooked for him. Hafsa(r.a.a) also cooked for him at the same time. She
told her servant to go and drop Hafsa's(r.a.a) food. The servant did that. The pan in which Hafsa(r.a.a)
brought the food also fell down and broke. The Prophet(s.a.w) picked up Hafsa's(r.a.a) food and ate it and
told Hafsa(r.a.a) to take Aisha's(r.a.a) pan as compensation. He didn't get angry when His wives would envy
one another as he understood that women do envy :-)

61
10. Aisha(r.a.a) says that the prophet often talked about Khadija(r.a.a) and that made her jealous. One day
she said to the Prophet(s.a.w) that Khadija(r.a.a) was old and had lost all her looks, even her teeth; why does
he still talk about her when Allah has given him better ones (meaning herself) She said that the
Prophet(s.a.w) was so mad at her and said that Allah has not given him one better than Khadija(r.a.a); she
was his only friend and believer when the whole world was against him.
Lets relate this to the present day situation. A young couple love each other initially but after 2, 3, 5 years,
everything is lost. But the Prophet(s.a.w) loved Khadija(r.a.a) even after her death, year after year after
year. Now this, is what you call "True Love". It did not change with time or looks.
Aisha(r.a.a) said that she used to be careful not to mention the name of Khadija(r.a.a) in front of the
Prophet(s.a.w). If not, once He started talking about Her, He would never stop. lol!

11. Aisha(r.a.a) says that at the time of his death the prophet was lying with his head resting on her chest.

12. Narrated 'Aisha: The Prophet used to lean on my lap and recite Qur'an while I was in menses.
She also said "None of you could control his sexual desires as the Prophet could."

13. Safiya(r.a.a) saw the Prophet(s.a.w) in pain because of something on which she said, "May your pain
become mine". At this the Prophet(s.a.w) looked at her in the eyes, you know with love and affection.?! yeah
:-). He said, "Wallahi, She says the truth".

14. Once while on an expedition where His wives had accompanied Him, Ayesha's(r.a.a) necklace fell down.
She told the Prophet(s.a.w) about it, who then stopped the caravan and asked the whole caravan to look for
her necklace. What would another man do? He would only rebuke his wife for being careless.
15. On a military expedition Anas(r.a.a) saw the Prophet(s.a.w) folding a cloak round the hump of the camel
so as to make a wide space for Safiya (to sit on behind him). He sat beside his camel letting his knees for
Safiya to put her feet on so as to mount the camel.
16. Once Safiya(r.a.a) was riding behind the Prophet(s.a.w). Suddenly the foot of the camel slipped and both
of them fell. Abu Talha immediately rushed to help the Prophet and asked him if he received any injury, to
which the Prophet (s.a.w) said, "No, but take care of the lady (His wife)." Abu Talha then covered his face and
threw his garment over her (to help her).

17. Allah's apostle (s.a.w) was once watching the kids outside, play. He called on Aisha (raa) to watch by
putting a screen on the window (so that people outside couldn't see her). She puts her chin on His shoulder to
watch the kids, touching Her cheek with His. After sometime the Prophet (s.a.w) asked, "Are u finished?" to
which she says, "No, not yet". After sometime He again asked her if she's done; He asked her three times to
which she said "No, not yet". Then she says " I'm not enjoying watching them, but I'm enjoying touching u & I
don't want the other wives to see Me. ;->

18. There is another good incident but the hadeeth is pretty big and difficult to write it briefly. You can check
it by yourself. The reference is, Bukhari :: Book 9 :: Volume 86 :: Hadith 102
(He was as human as us in most aspects of life, the Greatest man ever to walk on the face of the earth! The
most beloved to Allah)

He respected and honored the rights of his wives even under the most severe conditions. This was the
Messenger of God!

Each of his wives, because of his generosity and kindness, thought that she was his most beloved. The idea
that any man could show equality and complete fairness in relationship with nine women seems impossible.
For this reason, the Messenger of God asked God’s pardon for any unintentional leanings. He would make this
prayer:

"I may have unintentionally shown more love to one of them than the others and this would have been
injustice. So, O Lord, I take refuge in Your grace for those things which are beyond my power."

The Prophet’s consultation with his wives

62
Safiyya was of Jewish origin and on one occasion she was dismayed when her origin was mentioned to her
sarcastically. She informed the Messenger, expressing her sadness. Our master comforted her saying: If they
repeat it, give them this response: ‘My father is the Prophet Aaron, my uncle is the Prophet Moses and my
husband is, as you see, the Prophet Muhammad, the Chosen One. What do you have more than me to be proud
of?’10

The choice God’s Messenger gave to his wives

The wives of the Messenger were given the choice of remaining with him or leaving. This incident is referred
to as al-takhyir and is also called al-ila. It was mentioned in the Qur’an as follows:

O Prophet! Say to your consorts: ‘If it be that you desire the life of this world, and its glitter, then
come! I will provide for your enjoyment and set you free in a handsome manner. But if you seek God and His
Messenger and the Home of the Hereafter, verily God has prepared for you, the well doers amongst you, a
great reward’. (al-Ahzab, 33:28-9)

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CHAPTER-7

COLLAPSE OF THE WEST

Minneapolis bridge collapse, August 1, 2007

Do you think the World Wars were actually World Wars?? The list of countries that did not participate is
shorter than the list of countries that did. Countries which actually did not participate but were mainly used
as bases by those who did, were also counted as participants. There were other countries Like India, Srilanka,
Egypt who did not participate but whose men were used by the Japanese & by the British Empire to fight for
them. Hence they were also counted as participants.
Afghanistan didn’t participate, Saudi Arabia didn’t participate, Algeria didn’t, Indonesia & dozens of other
countries didn’t. But still, they were called "the World Wars".

Why???

Because the US & the British wanted to share the blame on the whole world & thus share the sin of this crazy
massacre, with the world. More than 65 million people were killed in both World Wars. Who were the killers
& who were the killed? Christians!!! Christians killing Christians, Jews and Buddhists. Muslims were least
involved. And yet, they bark: Muslims are violent, Muslims are savages, Muslims are intolerant, blah, blah.
You know which is the most violent country rated by the "UN"? check this:

Scotland tops list of world's most violent countries

The Times ^ | 9/19/05 | Katrina Tweedie
Posted on 09/20/2005 7:55:35 AM PDT by Valin
A UNITED Nations report has labeled Scotland the most violent country in the developed world, with people
three times more likely to be assaulted than in America. England and Wales recorded the second highest
number of violent assaults while Northern Ireland recorded the fewest.
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And the least?? Check this web page: http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_percap-crime-murders-
per-capita look for the countries at the bottom, they’re the least violent.

You think Bin Laden masterminded 9/11? watch the documentary "loose change" [approx. 60 mins for both
parts] by Dylan Avery on youtube or google video. Or download it here:
http://www.question911.com/linksall.htm

George Bernard Shaw had written: “Islam is the best religion and Muslims are the worst people, and I foresee
that in the coming 100 years, Islam will be the religion of the West.”
He had predicted at around 1950 that this civilization (the Christian) is soon going to fall because of its
impractical & horrendous beliefs (It’s ok to cheat, lie and even kill a non-Christian). It is going to be replaced
by a Civilization with more practical beliefs and values and which is powerful enough to take over the whole
of this civilization, either in this century or in the next for sure. Buddhism, Judaism, Hinduism and other
major religions haven't got what it takes to take over this powerful civilization, either religiously or
politically.
Hence, it ultimately has to be, Islam. It is due to happen in this century, i.e., the 21st Insha Allah.

Does it go with the prediction of our Prophet (PBUH): "There will not be a single house in this world where
Islam would not have entered" ?

The US is on its way to a major collapse- Economically, Academically, Spiritually and Morally.

EDUCATIONAL COLLAPSE

Did you know, only 20% of the American School Students go to the University for higher studies as against
Indian 25%? Who's more backward in Education?
Most of the Students studying in the universities of the West are not the locals but foreigners- Indians,
Koreans, Japanese, Chinese, Arabs, etc. Even the Scientists and Doctors and Engineers and all the intellectual
posts are mostly occupied by foreigners. The educational growth of the local Westerners is on the lower side.
The country is just not producing enough engineers and thus they need to import many from various
countries, thus compromising with their wealth with the outsiders.

I have a brother who's working as a Tech Support Associate in Dell. He gets calls from the US customers, many
of whom are so ignorant that one customer calls and says: "My keyboard isn't working". My friend tried all sorts
of technical procedures but nothing helped. Then he asked "Sir, did the keyboard fall from the desk o
something?" He said, "No, I just washed it with soap and water; it’s become clean but it doesn’t work". lol

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ECONOMIC COLLAPSE

In no time, 45 Rs a Dollar changed to 40Rs a Dollar.

Lets look at the kind of debt the US is in.

U.S. National Debt Clock

The Outstanding Public Debt as of 01 Aug 2007 at 11:21:35 AM GMT is:

Just below an eye-popping $ 9 trillion!!!!!!!! (Mind you, it's just the public debt)
http://www.brillig.com/debt_clock/

America's Total Debt Report

$ 48 Trillion - - and soaring- and the highest debt ratio in history.

- Household, business, financial and government sectors -
By Michael Hodges - email
Updated March 2007
- A chapter of the Grandfather Economic Reports -
http://mwhodges.home.att.net/nat-debt/debt-nat.htm

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That's $161,287 per man, woman and child - - or $645,148 per family of 4,
$45,514 more debt per family than last year.

2 great questions:
Can the production of debt forever replace the production of goods and savings?
Can Americans forever borrow their way to prosperity?
Easy Answer > NO WAY!!

US President George W. Bush’s “borrow now, pay later” approach to financing the war in Iraq means that
future generations and foreign creditors to the US will bear the cost, which some economists estimate to be
as high as US $2 trillion.
January 16, 2007
http://www.globalpolicy.org/socecon/crisis/tradedeficit/2007/0116warcosts.htm

After a decade of global currency crises, broad economic distress, and wrenching neo-liberal reorganization,
the US crisis -- as well as that of ailing Japan -- may spell deeper international instability in the period
ahead.

"We can no longer view ourselves as king of the hill," said Leo Melamed, chairman emeritus of the Chicago
Mercantile Exchange and founder of the world's first market for financial futures. "There are a lot of other
potential kings now vying to take our place."

As the dollar has steadily weakened over the past year, the value of the dollar-denominated assets held by
central banks has also declined. The trend may motivate foreigners to start holding more euros instead,
exacerbating pressure on the dollar and leading to faster U.S. inflation rates and a declining standard of
living.
"Historically, no country that has gotten itself into this situation has ever come out without a crisis," Rogers
said. "We're in a great amount of trouble."
Reuters April 27, 2007
http://www.globalpolicy.org/socecon/crisis/tradedeficit/2007/0427dollardrop.htm

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The United States Is In Deep Doodoo!
United States Congressional Record - March 17, 1993 - Vol. #33, page H-1303 - Speaker- Rep. James Traficant,
Jr. (Ohio) addressing the House:

"Mr. Speaker, we are here now in chapter 11. Members of Congress are official trustees presiding over the
greatest reorganization of any Bankrupt entity in world history, the U.S. Government. We are setting forth
hopefully, a blueprint for our future. There are some who say it is a coroner's report that will lead to our
demise."
http://www.whatreallyhappened.com/ARTICLE2/doodoo.html

SPIRITUAL COLLAPSE

FOR SALE PRESTIGIOUS FORMER EVANGELICAL CHURCH CONVERTED TO PUBLIC HOUSE CAFE/BAR- Business
town center position on nightlife circuit, well run established cafe/bar character building former evangelical
free church.
£900,000 TO LEASE
Worthing - Commercial
http://www.jordanandcook.com/propertyDetailCom.asp?id=1413

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Church turned into one of the most active mosques in Manchester.
http://flickr.com/photos/29361568@N00/132919938/
Allah hu Akbar!!

Christianity, being the major religion in the West is suffering a mighty blow, what with more & more people
starting to think logically & beginning to question their faith.
Islam is the only religion which caters to both the body & the spiritual needs in a perfect manner. A proper
investigation by even a non-Muslim leads Him to discover that.

According to "The Articles of Plain Truth" a survey was conducted on the growth rate of the Major religions,
during the period 1934-1984. Christianity's growth rate was 47% which puts it in the second position. The
Christian missionaries and their crude methods are working with the economically backward, especially in
places like India. The backward tribes are offered money & other things for converting.
Which is the first? No prizes for guessing: Islam with a staggering 235% percent!!!. Alhamdulillah. We've
grown more than double in just 50 years!!! Allahu Akbar. Even with such less number of Da'ees. Islam is the
fastest growing religion in the world no doubt, but more than the world on the whole, it is In America that it’s
growing faster. Islam is the fastest growing religion in the US.
http://www.cnn.com/WORLD/9704/14/egypt.islam/

Check out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj6sBGD1QXI (22 people accept Islam at the end of

Sheikh Khalid Yasin’s lecture).. Just a small proof of the fastest growing faith
Just put in the keywords “muslim revert” or similar ones in google video or youtube and you’l find hundreds of
reverts, their stories. You can also google search with similar keywords for many stories to read

The Barna web site contains an interesting analysis of the unchurched by age, education, marital status, etc
of the Americans. Some of the more interesting data include:

17% are an Atheist or Agnostic.

22% believe that the Bible is inerrant. (So 78% know that it is errant)
40% of adults aged 18 to 29 are "unchurched" -- those who have not gone to a religious service during the
previous six months.
47% believe that Jesus engaged in sinful behavior while on earth.
49% reject the God of the Bible (perfect, present, omnipotent, omniscient, creator of the universe).
67% say that Satan is not a living being but a symbol of evil.
"The proportion of the [American] population that can be classified as “Christian” has declined from 86% in
1990 to 77% in 2001." ARIS Study.
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MORAL COLLAPSE
This is most relevant to the topic under discussion.

12 year old Gabriel Keys arrested by police officers for trespassing in Pinellas Park, Florida, March 23, 2005. The
young protester attempted to take a glass of water into the Woodside Hospice for the brain-damaged Terri Schiavo.

Do we need to stress on how there is a moral collapse in the US? The US, the cultures of which we're slaves,
have nude bars in every place. Strip shows & sex dates are the common entertainments of the people. Girls
getting pregnant at the age of 13, aborting the child or dumping it in a bin, having no education because of
that, and ultimately, finding no choice, ending up as prostitutes - these are also very common instances.
People have sex at a very early age because of which their sex life gets over pretty fast & thus they need
something unnatural to satisfy themselves- Like child sex, lesbianism, gayism, incest & god knows what all.
Being a swinger is something "cool". Public nudity is on the rise. U have nude beaches, nude parties, & nude
tours!!!
There is no need of marriage at all. You wanna have sex, u can have it with anybody- your neighbors, your
friends, your teachers & even with your family!!!! And if at all a relation develops b/w a couple, this is what
happens- after 4 yrs of relation the lady delivers. She expects her bf to come to the hosp & speak bout their
marriage. He comes, with a bouquet & says, "Love, these 4 yrs with u were really great. You’ve given me all
the happiness that I could get. But u c, as time passes many things in life change & we've to move with the
change. I've got certain problems that I need to deal with. Hence it’s not possible for us to marry. We can't
stay together any longer. I’m very sorry for that. Please take care of yourself & the child." He's gone, never to
be seen again. If u wanna hear similar stories u can find hundreds on many online forums (I won’t mention
them here). & in this case the guy is actually polite. Others leave just abruptly.

This is another problem for the West- “decreasing birth rates”. Hence the government is giving subsidies to
the parents of every newborn child. A bf-gf do everything & sometimes more than a married couple, so where
is the need for marriage?

Let the statistics do the rest of the talking:-

50% of the girls in the US are molested before their maturity- by their stepfathers, uncles, & sometimes their
fathers & brothers.
25% of the Americans do not know who their father is!!

70
Six out of 10 Americans Say Homosexual Relations Should Be Recognized as Legal.
The FBI crime report of 1990 says on an average 1756 rapes take place every day in the US. According to
another report it is more than 1900/day. That means for every 1.3 min, one rape takes place!! Everywhere
else, a rape is considered as a stigma, In the US it is a lifestyle. And out of all the rapes, 16% were reported;
out of those only 10% were arrested; i.e., only 1.6% of the rapists are arrested. Out of this, 50% were let go
before trial. So that means only 0.8% of the rapists undergo trial. That implies, out of 125 rapists only one is
punished!!!

The collapse is inevitable.

The Western leaders are afraid of Islam very much. Bcoz the amount of enjoyment that the leaders are having
is all bcoz of this immorality. If the people discover Islam, then everything will stop- The dance bars, the red
light centers, Alcohol, gambling & everything, hence they don’t want Islam to prevail. For this, they try day in
& day out to bring a bad name to Islam. A Muslim commits a murder- front page; a non-Muslim does that,
somewhere in some corner of the inner pages. A 60-year-old Muslim marries a 16 year-old girl - front page; a
60 year old nonMuslim rapes a 16 year old girl – inner page.

Islam and this barbaric culture can never unite. You've got to choose your side now. Prophet Moses (PBUH)
was once asked by one of his companion that "if Allah makes the sky His bow & the stars His arrows, & He
begins shooting 'em at us, what is the way to escape?" Prophet Moses (PBUH) replied, no way to escape other
than going and sitting on the lap of the one shooting. :-) So just two sides are here; which side do u wanna be?

Satan wants to divide us. The Western leaders fear a lot about we Muslims uniting. Hence they go to any
extremes to try & deviate some of our brothers and sisters from Islam. Satan is clever. He wont ask u to quit
Islam or not to follow Quran, Nah! But he'll try to make what is illegal in Islam, seem legal by giving us an
alternative look at Islam & its rules. Just by using a little logic & common sense, we can figure out his ways.
Some are so stupid that their view about the hadith "It is better for a man that a steel nail be driven through
the center of his head rather than if he touches the palm of a strange women." as, "Ah! It’s just the palm
that we shouldn’t touch, we can touch her elsewhere". :-I

THE GOLDEN AGE

The coming of the "Mahdi" and the return of Prophet Jesus (Pbuh) will bring along with it an age called "The
Golden Age" as indicated in the hadith. At a time when political, social and moral turbulence is at its peak,
the Mahdi will appear and the world will take a complete U-turn. The Mahdi will be from the descendants of
Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w), whom Allah will help to make Islam prevail on the lines of the Prophet (s.a.w).
Later on, Prophet Jesus (pbuh) will appear and will break the Cross, kill the pig and abolish Jizyah according
to the Ahadeeth. All the Christians then will be humbled and revert InshaAllah. The Mahdi & Prophet Jesus
(pbuh) will change the world's condition completely for the good. So, the Golden Age will have features like;
"Every person will become a devout slave of Allah", "Everyone in prosperity", "More people to give but
hardly anybody to take", "No immorality", "Science and Technological development at its peak which will
be used only for good", "Abundance of rain but not even a single drop would be wasted", "Hardly any
sickness or diseases to be found", "Everyone living in complete peace and harmony", "A life quite similar
to the one in paradise", etc.
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So when will the Mahdi emerge? The initial signs as indicated in the Hadith have already occurred. One is "The
stopping of the river Euphrates" which has already happened (A dam was built in river Euphrates thus stopping
its flow). Many other initial signs have also passed.
To know more watch the video "The End Times and the Mahdi" by Harun Yahya part 1 & 2, and "Jesus will
return", by him again.

You can also know more about the order of the events here: http://www.islam-
qa.com/index.php?ref=43840&ln=eng&txt=mahdi
and also: http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=2281&ln=eng&txt=mahdi

Between Good and Evil, Love and Hate

The war is on - choose your side
Choose our enemy - choose your friend
I am not your enemy - I am your friend
Choose your weapon - mine is my pen

-Dr. Shahid Athar, MD.

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Chapter-8

HELL
Lets take a look as to what the Holy Quran and the hadeeth say about Hell. (I've just picked a few out of the
many verses and hadeeth about Hell).

"Soon I will cast him into Hellfire. And what will explain to you what Hellfire is? Naught does it permit to
endure, and naught does it leave alone! Darkening and changing the colour of man! Over it are nineteen
[angels as guardians and keepers of Hell]" (74:26-30)

"O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones, over which
are [appointed] angels stern [and] severe, who flinch not [from executing] the Commands they receive from
Allah, but do [precisely what] they are commanded." (66:6)

at-Tahhaawee reports, in Mishkil al-Aathaar, that Salamah ibn 'Abdur-Rahman said, "Abu Hurayrah told us that
the Prophet (saw) said:
"The sun and moon will be two rolled-up bulls in Hell on the Day of Resurrection"

This Fire never dies down, no matter how much time passes:

"So taste you [the results of your evil actions]; no increase shall We give you, except in torment". (78:30)

".whenever it abates, We shall increase for them the fierceness of the Fire". (17:97)

"Their torment shall not be lightened nor shall they be helped". (2:86)

"Verily those who reject faith and die rejecting - on them is Allah's Curse and the Curse of the Angels and of
all mankind. They will abide therein: their penalty will not be lightened, nor will respite be their lot." (2:161-
162)

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"Their wish will be to get out of the Fire, but never will they get out therefrom: their Penalty will be one that
endures". (5:37)

The Prophet (saw) told us: "Fire as we know it is one-seventieth part of the Fire of Hell." Someone said, "O
Messenger of Allah (saw), it is enough as it is!" He said, "It [the fire of Hell] is as if sixty nine equal portions
were added to the fire as we know it." (al-Bukhaari)

If this fire of the volcano which is present on earth is one-seventieth part of the fire of hell. imagine the
full part!!!!!!

food & drink:

"Verily the tree of Zaqqum will be the food of the sinful, like molten brass, it will boil in their insides,
like the boiling of scalding water." (44:43-46).
"If one drop from az-Zaqqum were to land on this world, the people of earth and all their means of
sustenance would be destroyed. So how must it be for the one who must eat it?" It was reported by at-
Tirmidhi, who said, it is a sahih hasan hadith. [Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 3/105, narrated by Ibn 'Abbaas]

".[they] will be given to drink, boiling water, so that it cuts up their bowels [to pieces]" (47:15)

"Verily with Us are fetters [to bind them] and a raging Fire [to burn them], And a food that chokes and a
Penalty grievous". (73:12-13)

74
If this is a food one can be forced to have here in this world, then just imagine what we could be forced to
have in Hell??!! God gives the severest of punishments. yikes! The pics itself make me lose my appetite, I
dunno how I managed to put ‘em here. imagine guyz, just imagine what we could be made to eat in hell!!!!

"This is so! Then let them taste it, a boiling fluid and dirty wound discharges" (38:57)

Drinks anyone?!!

pus sample

"Yea, such! - Then shall they taste it - a boiling fluid and a fluid dark, murky, intensely cold [ghassaaq]!
And other penalties of a similar kind - to match them!" (38:57-58)

al-Ghassaaq mean the same thing, which is the festering pus that oozes out of the skin of the people of
Hell. It was suggested that it refers to the offensive discharge that flows from the private parts of
adulterous women, and the decaying skin and flesh of the kuffaar. al-Qurtubee said, "It is the juice of the
people of Hell" [Yaqhadhat uli al-I'tibaar, p. 86]

"Verily the hypocrites will be in the lowest depths [grade] of the Fire" (4:145)
It is said that both Paradise and Hell have different levels; the lower the level in Hell, the greater the
75
intensity of the heat. The hypocrites (We namesake Muslims) will suffer the worst punishment, and so they
will be in the lowest level of Hell.

"But he whose balance [of good deeds] will be [found] light, will have his home in a [bottomless] pit. And
what will explain to you what this is? [It is] a Fire blazing fiercely!" (101:8-11)

"Depart you to a shadow [of smoke ascending] in three columns, [which yields] no shade of coolness and
is of no use against the Fierce Blaze". Indeed! It [Hell] throws about sparks [huge] as forts, as if there
were [a string of] yellow camels [marching swiftly]." (77:30-33)

".the sinner's desire will be: would that he could redeem himself from the Penalty of that Day by
[sacrificing] his children, his wife and his brother, his kindred who sheltered him, and all, all that is on
earth, so that it could deliver him. By no means! For it would be the Fire of Hell! Plucking out [his being]
right to the skull". (70:11-16)

"Those who reject Our Signs, We shall soon cast them into the Fire. As often as their skins are roasted
through, We shall change them for fresh skins, that they may taste the penalty. For Allah is Exalted in
Power, All-Wise" (4:56)

Look a these creatures below. If these are enough to terrify people on earth, imagine the monsters that might
terrify us in hell!!!

The (blood-sucking) Chupacabra The Loch Ness Monster

The Jersey devil The Bunyip

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The Shark

Randy Snake A Carnivorous Plant

77
".We shall gather them together prone on their faces, blind, dumb, and deaf; their abode will be Hell;
every time it shows abatement, We shall increase for them the Fierceness of the Fire". (17:97)

". then as for those who disbelieve, garments of fire will be cut out for them, boiling water will be poured
down over their heads. With it will melt or vanish away what is within their bellies, as well as [their]
skins". (22:19-20)

"When yokes [shall be] round their necks, and the chains, they shall be dragged along." (40:71)

So how are we gonna reach this wonderful place called Hell??? Ask me, I’ll teach you innovative ways. :-)

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Chapter-9

PARADISE: There is Nothing Like It

[Note: The images that you see in this chapter are just of this world. No comparison can be made
between them and the real paradise which is infinitely better and beyond our imagination]

"Verily those who believe and do righteous deeds and humble themselves [in repentance and obedience]
before their Rabb - they will be dwellers of Paradise to dwell therein forever" [11:23]

The delights of Paradise surpass the imagination and defy description. They are like nothing known to the
people of this world; no matter how advanced we may become, what we achieve is as nothing in comparison
with the joys of the Hereafter. As is mentioned in several reports, there is nothing like Paradise:

This confirmed by the words of Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, "No person knows what is kept
hidden for them of joy as a reward for what they used to do". [32:17]

"It is sparkling light, aromatic plants, a lofty palace, a flowing river, ripe fruit, a beautiful wife and
abundant clothing, in an eternal abode of radiant joy, in beautiful soundly-constructed high houses". [Ibn
Maajah, as-Sunan, Kitaab az-Zuhd, Baab Sifaat al-Jannah, 2/1448, no. 4332. Ibn Hibbaan narrated it in his
saheeh]

79
80
"Only he who is saved far from the Fire and admitted to the Garden, will have indeed attained the object
of life [or: been successful]" (3:185)

81
There is no doubt that the joy of the believers will be incomparable when they are led, group by honourable
group, to the blessed Gardens of Paradise.
When they reach Paradise its gates will be opened for them, and they will be welcomed by noble angels
congratulating them on their safe arrival after suffering so much hardship and withnessing so much horror:

"And those who feared their Rabb will be led to the garden in crowds, until, behold, they arrive there; its
gates will be opened and its keepers will say "Peace be upon you! Well have you done! Enter here, to
dwell therein". (39:73)

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"There they will have all that they desire - and We have more [for them, i.e. a glance at the All-Mighty,
All-Majestic." [50:35]

This is a joy and honor that will be denied to the Kuffaar and Mushrikeen.

"Nay, surely they [evildoers] will be veiled from seeing their Rabb that day." [83:15]

The Sinners Among the Believers Will Enter Paradise After serving their term in Hell.

l-Bukhaari reports from 'Imraan ibn Husayn (ra) that the Prophet (saw) said, "Some people will be brought
out of Hell through the intercession of Muhammad (saw). They will enter Paradise and will be known as
al-Jahannamiyyoon." [Sahih al-Bukhaari, Kitaab ar-Riqaaq, Baab Sifaat al-Jannah wan-Naar, Fath al-Baari,
11/418.

83
Anas ibn Maalik reported that the Prophet (saw) said: "Whoever says Laa ilaaha illaa Allah and has a
barely grain's weight of goodness in his heart will be brought out of the Fire. Then whoever says, "Laa
ilaaha illaa Allah" and has a wheat grains weight of goodness in his heart will be brought out of the Fire.
Then whoever says, Laa Ilaaha illaa Allah and has an atom's-weight of goodness in his heart will be
brought out of the Fire". [Sahih Muslim, Kitaab al-Imaan, Baab adna Ahl al-Jannah Manzilatan, 1/182]
Now this "atom's weight" looks very easy to acquire right. But research scholars say even that is very difficult
to acquire. Ex: Skipping a salah is equal to not having even an atom's weight of faith.

Shirk will not be forgiven, but any other sin is subject to the Will of Allah

"Allah forgives not that partners should be set up with Him, but He forgives anything else, to whom He
pleases." (4:48)

The people of Paradise and their Mates:

".free from any laghw [dirty, false, evil, vague talk], and free from sin" [52:23

"No laghw will they hear therein, nor any sinful speech [like backbiting, etc], But only the saying of Salaam!
Salaam! [greetings with peace]" [56:25]

"Enter Paradise, you and your wives, in happiness" [43:70]

Al-Bukhaari reports from Abu Hurayrah (ra) that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said:

"The first group to enter Paradise will be as beautiful as the full moon. They will not spit, blow their noses or
excrete. Their vessels will be of gold, their combs of gold and silver, their incense of aloe, and their sweat of
musk. Each of them will have two wives, the marrow of whose leg-bones will be visible through their flesh
because of their extreme beauty. There will be no differences or hatred among them (the people of
Paradise); their hearts will be as one, and they will glorify Allah (swt) morning and evening". (Kitaab Bid' al-
Khalq, Baab Ma Jaa' fi Sifaat al-Jannah, Fath al-Baari, 6/318; Muslim, at-Tirmidhi)

"If a woman from the people of Paradise were to look at this earth, she would light up everything between
it and fill it with her fragrance; the veil on her head is better than this world and all that is in it" [Mishkaat
al-Masaabeeh, 3/85, no. 5614]

".and they shall have therein Azwaajun Muttaharatun [Purified mates having no menses, urine, stools, etc]"
[2:25]

"Verily, for al-Muttaqoon, there will be a success; gardens and grapeyards and voluptuous women of equal
age." [78:31-33]
"Verily, We have created [their companions] of special creation, and made them virgin-pure [and undefiled],
beloved [by nature], equal in age." [56:35-37]

"In them will be fair [companions] good and beautiful; then which of the favors of your Rabb will you deny?
Companions restrained [as to their glances] in [goodly] pavilions" [55:70-72]

"The wives of the people of Paradise will sing to their husband in the most beautiful voices that anyone has
ever heard. What they will sing is: "We are good and beautiful, the wives of a noble people, who look at their
husbands content and happy." And they will sing, "We are eternal, and will never die, we are safe and will
never fear, we are remaining here and will never go away."" [Saheeh al-Jaami as-Sagheer, 2/48, no. 1557;
also Abu Na'eem, ad-Diyaa in Sifaat al-Jannah]

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Food
"Trays of gold and cups will be passed round them, [there will be] therein all that one's soul could desire, all
that the eyes could delight in, and you will abide therein forever" [43:71]

85
"Any fruit [any] that they may choose, And the flesh of fowls that they desire" [56:20-21]

"And fruit in plenty, whose season is not limited, and their supply will not be cut off" [56:32-33]

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The wine of Paradise, as described by its Creator, is:
"Crystal-white, delicious to those who drink [thereof], free from intoxication, nor will they suffer intoxication
therefrom" [37:46-47]

".rivers of water incorruptible; rivers of milk of which the taste never changes." [47:15]

"And round about them will [serve] boys of everlasting youth. If you see them, you would think them scattered
pearls." [76:19]

As reported in the hadith narrated by al-Bukhaari and Muslim, from Abu Hurayrah (ra), the people of Paradise
"will not spit, blow their noses or excrete".

Clothing & Comfort

"'Adn Paradise they will enter, therein will they be adorned with bracelets of gold and pearls, and their
garments there will be of silk." [35:33]

al-Khudri that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said, "Tooba is a tree in Paradise, as big as a hundred year's
journey; the clothes of the people of Paradise comes from its calyces [the outer parts of its flowers]" [Silsilat
al-Hadith as-Saheehah, 4/639, no. 1985, the isnaad is hasan]

".there will be placed upon his head a crown of dignity, one ruby of which is better than this world and all
that is in it." [Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 3/358, no. 3834, Saheeh Muslim, saheeh]

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The Sahabah asked the Prophet (saw) about the Buildings of Paradise and he replied with a wonderful
description:

"Bricks of gold and silver, and mortar of fragrant musk, pebbles of pearl and sapphire, and soil of saffron.
Whoever enters it is filled with joy and will never feel miserable; he will live there forever and never die;
their clothes will never wear out and their youth will never fade." [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi, ad-Daarimee,
Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 3/29, sahih].

"The believer in Paradise will have a tent made out of a single, hollowed-out pearl, sixty miles long, in which
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he will have [a number of] wives, whom he will visit in turn, none of whom will see the others". [see also
Muslim, Kitaab al-Jannah, Baab fi Sifaat Khiyaam al-Jannah, 4/2182, no. 2838]

"Musaa asked his Rabb, "Who will have the lowest position in Paradise?" Allah said, "A man who will come
after the people of Paradise have entered Paradise. He will be told, "Enter Paradise", and he will say, "O my
Rabb, how? The people have already taken their places." He will be asked, "Will you not be content if you
could have the equivalent of a kingdom on earth?" He will say, "Yes, my Rabb". So he will be told, "You will
have that and as much again, and as much again, and as much again, and as much again." On the fifth time,
he will say, "I am content with that, my Rabb". He will be told, "You will have all that and ten times more;
you will have whatever your heart desires and whatever will delight your eyes." The man will say, "I am
content with that".

"Therein will be thrones raised high, And cups set at hand, and cushions set in rows, and rich carpets [all
spread out]" [88:13-16]

“….he will remain there forever and never die; [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi, ad-Daarimee, Mishkaat
al-Masaabeeh, 3/29, sahih].

They are the successful. Their Rabb gives them glad tidings of a Mercy from Him, and
that He is pleased and of Gardens for them wherein are everlasting delights. They will
dwell therein forever. Verily, with Allah is a great reward". [9:19-22]

they will be dwellers of Paradise to dwell therein forever" [11:23]

You still think Paradise is cheap???

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Chapter-10

WILLPOWER
An awe-inspiring article by a wise brother.

Willpower
Article-star
December 03, 2007

It is impossible to achieve any reform without first developing our willpower.

If we want our youth to be able to keep their emotions in check, refrain from overindulgence, exhibit courage in
times of hardship, and uphold justice in the face of oppression, then we must realize that all of our advice will be
of no avail to them if they lack willpower. People need to develop their willpower before they can put their
convictions into practice. It takes willpower for a person to do something arduous, even if he thinks it is for his
own benefit. Likewise, it takes willpower for him to shun temptation, even when he knows that indulging such
temptations will be harmful to him. You can advise him all day long if you like, but it will do no good if the one
receiving your advice is weak-willed.

How, then, can we cultivate our willpower and strengthen it?

Consider a child who wants to learn to ride a bicycle. When he starts off, he cannot even keep the bike standing
straight, let alone go forward on it. When he does get going, he weaves wildly to the left and to the right and
ultimately ends up falling flat on the ground. With a lot of hard work and perseverance, he gets it in the end. He
learns to ride smoothly and easily. He even learns to do a few stunts.

What happened? The bicycle definitely did not change - except for possibly a few dents. It is just as willing to
obey its rider as it ever was. All the changes have taken place with the rider.

The same can be said for all of our goals in life. We have to get control of ourselves before we can tackle our
environment. The first step in this is to develop our willpower.

A weak-willed person is as shaky when it comes to life’s problems as that child was when he first climbed onto
his bicycle. If this person begins trying to strengthen his will, he will slowly but surely learn to move through life
more steadily. And just like when our nascent cyclist first took to the road, the weak-willed person is going to
need a lot of hard work and perseverance to get through his problems. However, as time goes on, facing his
problems will become easier and smoother. This is why the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The time for
patience is when misfortune first strikes.”

Strengthening our willpower is arduous at first, but once it is strengthened, life will become much easier.

A weak-willed person always resolves on something and then gives up. He goes through life like a weaver who
constantly unravels his own yarn. However, once a person actually goes forth with determination until he
reaches his goal, he will find that he can do so again with much less difficulty.

A pious man finds the performance of good deed as easy as a sinner finds indulging in vice. The difference
between the two is that the pious man directed his willpower toward virtue while the other directed his towards
sin.

Many young people get into bad habits without thinking. They just go with the flow, thoughtlessly aping their
peers without thinking about the consequences. Many of our youth succumb simply because they are weak-
willed.

Imagine a boy sitting with a couple of his friends. They start smoking and urge him to join them. He declines and
they start to put pressure on him. They justify what they are doing by saying that it eases stress or by offering

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some other baseless claim. So he takes his first puff, but he finds it irritating and has no desire to smoke again.
However, a few days later he finds himself in the same situation again. This time the irritation is not so bad. Now
he joins in with them wholeheartedly. Another bad habit is born.

If this boy had been strong-willed to begin with, he would never have smoked. It takes willpower to resist peer
pressure, whether the temptation at hand is smoking, drinking, or chasing girls.

Our youth have to learn to follow their reason instead of their desires. They need to have a strong sense of
responsibility.

When a person stays in bed even though it is time for the Fajr prayer or time to go to work, he gives in to sloth
and laziness and this weakens his willpower. However, if he has a strong sense of responsibility and obeys his
intellect, he will be able to get himself out of bed and do what he has to do. The same thing goes for every other
aspect of life. Whether a person gives in to sleep or to peer pressure, he dulls both his mind and his willpower
and he becomes less responsible as a person.

The great people we read about in history were strong willed people who obeyed their minds and not their
fancies. They built up their willpower by working hard and surmounting the obstacles that faced them. Great
people take pleasure in resisting temptation and in the sense of power and self-control that doing so gives them.
Our history testifies to a great number of such people.

Take Abû Bakr (RAA) at the time when many of the Arabs turned their backs on Islam and refused to pay Zakâh.
Many people advised Abû Bakr (RAA) to be lenient on them. However, he rejected their advice and demanded
that the Arabs accept Islam wholeheartedly without subtracting anything from it. We can see in this his
determination, his strength of will, and his ability to stand up in the face of the most trying of circumstances.

Consider Ibn Taymiyah’s stance when the ruler wanted him to abandon the opinions that he had arrived at
through careful study. When Ibn Taymiyah refused to do so, he was imprisoned and tortured but he still refused
to recant. Instead, he spent his time in prison writing books wherein he explained and defended his principles
and teachings. When they took away his pens and paper, he took up pieces of coal and began writing on the
walls. His determination in the face of imprisonment and torture is a great example of the triumph of the human
will over adversity and his writings are an enduring legacy of this triumph.

Willpower is one of the greatest secrets of success. By cultivating our willpower and strengthening it, we can
stand up to the trials that face us. A strong-willed person is someone who can improve himself and someone
who can benefit from the advice and guidance of others. By contrast, a weak-willed person cannot improve
himself and will not be availed of the efforts of others to better him. Before anything else, he needs to strengthen
himself. He needs to treat his weakness as if it were a disease and be patient during the healing process.

| Ahamed Ameen|

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 A PARADIGM SHIFT
Lets now briefly analyze the change in love from an unlawful (towards a non-mehram) to a lawful (towards Allah)
one, in the form of differences in one’s life.
[This is a subjective analysis and differs from person to person]
BEFORE
You wake up at her/his call on a fine Sunday morning
to know that she/he has already reached the place and
is waiting. You jump up, rush to the washroom, brush
your teeth, take a bath, iron & put on clothes hurriedly,
skip your breakfast, mumble a “bye” to your mom &
run.
Your lady-love/prince cant see nor perceive the kind of
efforts that you put in to meet her/him on time.
You are constantly thinking and day-dreaming about
your future, and what kind of gift to give, which place to
hangout, what to say in the next talk, etc.
You sing praises of her/his beauty/intelligence or
anything good that she/he has.
(note: referring to gf/bf, because doing the same to
your spouse is perfectly fine InshaAllah)
You watch the matinee show missing Dhuhr Salah.
Move more and more closer to Hell and more and
more away from Paradise.
Not much time for family. All the extra time is spent on
calls or messages or online chat.
Your future spouse (if it’s a different person) can’t
expect a guilt-free, start-to-end loyal and a completely
committed partner. Someone had eaten up some
portions of your heart already. Neither can you expect
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AFTER
You wake up 15 mins past the time you set the alarm
(@ 4:30 am) to know there’s just 15-20 mins left for the
time for Suhr to end, on a Monday or Thursday or
Sunday (not just of Ramadan, but almost every
month). You jump up, rush to washbasin, brush ur
teeth quickly (postpone bathing, after Suhr), prepare a
few toasts & egg, & heat milk, eat & drink hurriedly.
Then gulp 2-3 glasses of water, just in time, before
Suhr. Your Sehri’s done & u happy :->
Allah can see each and every effort, each and every
breath you take in exhaustion by the efforts you put in
to keep up his command or to do something
supererogatory (nafil), to make Him happy.
You have Allah’s love in your heart and remember Him
through many ways including Dhikr. You are constantly
thinking of ways to please Allah and to gain more
sawaab. Constantly thinking of ideas to serve Islam.
You praise all the unique attributes of Allah Like Ar-
rahman (the most beneficent), and do Dhikr by
contemplating on its meaning (you say Subhanallah
from your lips but you feel the meaning “glory be to
Allah” in your heart).
You are never too busy for Salah & perform all the 5
daily prayers at the right time, no matter what.
Move more and more closer to Paradise and more and
more away from Hell.
Enough time for family as you’ve realized that it is they
who deserve your love just after Allah.
Your future spouse can expect a guilt-free, start-to-end
loyal and a completely committed partner. She/he is
the only one you loved (in the romantic sense of the
word) in your life. InshaAllah, you can expect the
the same.
Not an easy-going relationship with spouse. Your past
haunts you.
Your “love” cant take you to paradise.
Cant be sure if Allah loves you.
Focus on career and aims is shaky.
Cannot be model for the younger muslims.
More chances of falling depressed and picking up bad
habits like fagging, ……
You are more concerned about how He/she might feel
when you fail to ‘care/show love’ sometime
You are irritable whenever you have a brawl with
her/him
same.
Alhamdulillah, a peaceful relationship with spouse with
no haunting thoughts of the past.
Allah can put you in paradise. In fact, He’s the only
one who can.
Can be pretty sure that Allah loves you.
Focus on career and aims is absolute.
Can set a good example for the younger generation.
More inclined towards good habits and a great
distance from the bad ones
You are more concerned about how Allah might feel or
what He could think about you when you fail to
remember Him sometime
You are a more calm and composed person at all
times

Understanding the Concept of Repentance

Question: Dear scholars! Could you please explain to me the
concept of Tawbah in Islam? Jazakum Allahu Khairan

Answer

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All thanks and praise are due to Allah and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear questioner! Thanks a lot for the apparent interest you show in understanding the teachings of
Islam that enlightens the hearts and the minds of people.

Brother! Tawbah is an Arabic words derived from the origin ‘Taaba’ i.e. returned back. Tawbah thus means
turning back in repentance. It means showing regret for the error and the sin one has got himself involved
in.

To have a clear view of the concept of Tawbah and what it does mean, read the following:

“Repentance (Tawbah) means that one feels regret and filled with remorse for his or her sins, turns to
Allah with the intention to obey Him. According to truth-seeking scholars, repentance signifies a sincere
effort to no longer oppose the Divine Essence in one’s feelings, thoughts, intentions, and acts, and to
comply sincerely with His commands and prohibitions. Repentance does not mean being disgusted with what is
bad or prohibited and thus no longer engaging in it; rather, it means remaining aloof from whatever Allah
hates and prohibits, even if it seems agreeable to sense and reason.

Repentance is usually used with Nasuh, literally meaning pure, sincere, reforming, improving, and
repairing. Tawbah Nasuh (genuine repentance) means a pure, sincere repentance that perfectly reforms and
improves the one who feels it. One who feels such a sincere, heartfelt, and true remorse for the sin
93
committed seeks to abandon it, thereby setting a good example for others. The Qur’an points to this when it
mentions true repentance: “O you who believe! Turn to God in true, sincere repentance.” (At-Tahrim: 8).

There are three categories of repentance:

1-The repentance of those who cannot discern Divine truths. Such people are uneasy about their
disobedience to Allah and, conscious of the sinfulness clouding their hearts, turn toward Allah in repentance
saying, for example: “I have fallen or committed a sin. Forgive me, or I ask for Allah’s forgiveness.”

2-Those half-awakened to Divine truths beyond veils of material existence, who feel an inward pang of
sinfulness and remorse right after thinking or doing anything incompatible with the consciousness of always
being in Allah’s presence, or after every instance of heedlessness enveloping their hearts, and who
immediately take refuge in the mercy and favor of Allah. Such people are described in the following
Hadith: “One who sincerely repents of his sin is as if he had never committed it. When Allah loves one of His
servants, his sins do not harm him. Then he recited the verse: ‘Assuredly, Allah loves the oft-repentant
and those who always seek to purify themselves.’”

3-Those who live such a careful life that, their eyes sleep but their hearts do not, their hearts are awake.
Such people immediately discard what-ever intervenes between Allah and their hearts and other innermost
faculties, and regain the consciousness of their relation to the Light of Lights. They always manifest
the meaning of: “How excellent a servant! Truly he was ever turning in contrition (to his Lord)” (Sad:44).

Repentance means regaining one’s essential purity after every spiritual defilement, and engaging in
frequent self-renewal.

The Stages of Repentance:

1-Feeling sincere remorse and regret.

2-Being frightened whenever one remembers past sins.

3-Trying to eradicate injustice and support justice and right.

4-Reviewing one’s responsibilities and performing obligations previously neglected.

5-Reforming oneself by removing spiritual defects caused by deviation and error

6-Regretting and lamenting the times when one did not mention or remember Allah, or thank Him and reflect
on His works. Such people are always apprehensive and alert so that their thoughts and feelings are not
tainted by things that intervene between themselves and Allah. (This last quality is particular to people
distinguished by their nearness to Allah.)

If one does not feel remorse, regret, and disgust for errors committed, whether great or small; if one is
not fearful or apprehensive of falling back into sin at any time; and if one does not take shelter in
sincere servanthood to Allah in order to be freed from deviation and error into which one has fallen by
moving away from God, any resulting repentance will be no more than a lie.

A Muslim should cry:

I’m sorry for the mistakes I make.

And, I know of none that can be retrieved.

They're like the water over a dam.

To flow back, it cannot be achieved.

There are things I wish I had never said.

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Now, I wish that I had bit my tongue instead.

To make another feel that pain,

For those thoughtless words, I am disdain.

Repentance is an oath of virtue, and holding steadfastly to it requires strong willpower. The lord
of the penitents, peace and blessings be upon him, says that one who repents sincerely and holds
steadfastly to it is has achieved the rank of a martyr, while the repentance of those who cannot free
themselves from their sins and deviations, although they repent repeatedly, mocks the door toward which
the truly repentant ones turn in utmost sincerity and resolution.

One who continues to sin after proclaiming a fear of Hell, who does not engage in righteous deeds despite
self-proclaimed desires for Paradise, and who is indifferent to the Prophet’s way and practices despite
assertions of love for the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, cannot be taken seriously. This
is also the case with one who claims to be sincere and pure-hearted, but spends his or her life oscillating
between sin and repentance.

An initiate’s first station is repentance, while the second is Inabah (sincere penitence). While repentance
requires the training of feelings, thoughts, and acts in order to move them from opposition to acceptance
and obedience, sincere penitence demands a critique of the authenticity, sincerity, and sufficiency of that
acceptance and obedience. Repentance is a progressing or journeying toward Allah—that is, seeking to do
what is pleasing to Allah and refraining from what is forbidden by Him. Sincere penitence is striving to
live an upright life so that one may seek Allah’s pleasure in all actions and thoughts.”

Excerpted, with slight modifications, from:

www.thewaytotruth.org

In conclusion, we would like to cite for you the following lines of verse by Imam Ash-Shafi`i, may
Allah be pleased with him:

“To You, the Creator, I raise my longing,

Though I am a sinner and a wrongdoer.

When it becomes black before my eyes,

I seek refuge in You and place my trust and hope.

When the heaps of my sins are compared to Your Grace.

Your Grace is greater and covers all the globe.”

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?cid=1119503545688&pagename=IslamOnline-English-
Ask_Scholar%2FFatwaE%2FFatwaEAskTheScholar

95
Eemaan is our treasure, Never Lose It!
Lessons from the Life of Musab Ibn Umair (ra) …

Here is the life history of a youth, reading which tears would roll down unknowingly from our eyes, our hearts
would become tender, and would make us feel so ashamed on how we have spent our youth.

His life will just remind us of the verse of the Glorious Qur’an, “Verily Allah has purchased of the believers,
their lives and their properties; for a price that their shall be the paradise”. (9:111).

Musab ibn Umair (ra) was the flower of the Quraish, the most handsome and youthful! Historians and narrators
describe him as "The most charming of the Makkans". He was born and brought up in wealth, and he grew up
with its luxuries. Perhaps there was no boy in Makkah who was pampered by his parents like Musab ibn
`Umair. This mirthful youth - caressed and pampered, the talk of the ladies of Makkah, the jewel of its clubs
and assemblies. Every noble family of Makkah wanted to give their daughters to this charming, handsome, rich
& noble youth.

Is it possible for him to be one of the legends of faith?.

Why not???, when EEMAN fills his heart.

He heard about a person who proclaims himself as prophet. He met Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) at
Daar Al Arqam and proclaimed the Shahada.

Mus`ab's mother was Khunaas Bint Maalik, and people feared her almost to the point of terror because she
possessed a strong personality. When Mus`ab became a Muslim, he decided to keep his Islam secret until Allah
willed.

However, Makkah at that time kept no secret, for the eyes and ears of the Quraish were everywhere, very
alert and checking every footprint in its hot sands. Mus`ab's mother came to know about it and became
astonished by it.

Mus`ab stood before his mother and the people & nobles of Makkah who assembled around him, telling them
the irrefutable truth and reciting the Qur'aan with which the Prophet (PBUH) cleansed their hearts and filled
them with honor, wisdom, justice, and piety. His mother aimed a heavy blow at him, but the hand which was
meant as an arrow soon succumbed to the powerful light which increased the radiance of his face with
innocent glory because it demanded respect with its quiet confidence. She took him to a rough corner of her
house and shut him in it. She put shackles on him and imprisoned him there until he escaped to Abyssinia and
came back to Makkah after some time.

He went out one day to some Muslims while they were sitting around the Prophet (PBUH), and no sooner did
they see him than they lowered their heads and shed some tears because they saw him wearing worn out
garments. They were accustomed to his former appearance before he had become a Muslim, when his clothes
had been like garden flowers, elegant and fragrant.

The Prophet (PBUH) saw him with the eyes of wisdom, thankful and loving, and his lips smiled gracefully as he
said, "I saw Mus`ab here, and there was no youth in Makkah more petted by his parents than he. Then he
abandoned all that for the love of Allah and His Prophet!"

Musab became satisfied with a hard life he had never seen before, wearing the roughest clothes, eating one
day and going hungry another. This spirit, which was grounded in the strongest faith, adorned with the light of
Allah, made him another man, one who appeals to the eyes of other great souls.

While he was in this state, the Prophet (PBUH) commissioned him with the greatest mission of his life, which
was to be his envoy to Al-Madiinah. His mission was to instruct the Ansaar who believed in the Prophet (PBUH)
and had pledged their allegiance to him at `Aqabah, to call others to Islam, and to prepare Al-Madiinah for
the day of the great Hijrah. He won the hearts of the Madinites with his piety, uprightness and sincerity. And
96
so they embraced the religion of Allah in flocks.

The days and years passed by. The Prophet (PBUH) and his Companions emigrated to Al-Madiinah, and the
Quraish were raging with envy and their ungodly pursuit after the pious worshippers. Then came the battle of
Uhud. The Prophet (PBUH) stood in their midst to choose one to bear the standard. He then called for Mus`ab
the Good, and he advanced and carried the standard.

In the battle, the polytheists concentrated on the Prophet of Allah to finish him off. Mus`ab saw the
impending threat, so he raised the standard high, shouting, "Allahu Akbar! Allah is the Greatest!", like the roar
of a lion. He turned and jumped left and right, fighting and killing the foe. All he wanted was to draw the
attention of the enemy to himself in order to turn their attention away from the Prophet (PBUH). He thus
became as a whole army in himself. Nay, Mus`ab went alone to fight as if he were an army of giants raising
the standard in sanctity with one hand, striking with his sword with the other. But the enemies were
multiplying on him. They wanted to step on his corpse so that they could find the Prophet (PBUH).

Let us allow a living witness to describe for us the last scene of Mus`ab the Great. Ibn Sa`d said: Ibraahiim lbn
Muhammad lbn Sharhabiil Al-'Abdriy related from his father, who said: Mus`ab lbn `Umair carried the
standard on the Day of Uhud. When the Muslims were scattered, he stood fast until he met lbn Qumaah who
was a knight. He struck him on his right hand and cut it off, but Mus`ab said, "And Muhammad is but a
Messenger. Messengers have passed away before him " (3:144). He carried the standard with his left hand and
leaned on it. He struck his left hand and cut it off, and so he leaned on the standard and held it with his
upper arms to his chest, all the while saying, "And Muhammad is but a Messenger. Messengers have passed
away before him". Then a third one struck him with his spear, and the spear went through him. Mus`ab fell
and then the standard.

Nay, the cream of martyrdom had fallen! He fell after he had struggled for the sake of Allah in the great
battle of sacrifice and faith. He had thought that if he fell, he would be a stepping stone to the death of the
Prophet (PBUH) because he would be without defense and protection. But he put himself in harm's way for
the sake of the Prophet (PBUH), overpowered by his fear for and love of him, he continued to say with every
sword stroke that fell on him from the foe, "And Muhammad is but a Messenger. Messengers have passed away
before him "(3:144). This verse was revealed later, after he had spoken it.

After the bitter battle, they found the corpse of the upright martyr lying with his face in the dust, as if he
feared to look while harm fell on the Prophet (PBUH). So he hid his face so that he would avoid the scene. Or
perhaps, he was shy when he fell as a martyr, before making sure of the safety of the Prophet of Allah, and
before serving to the very end, guarding and protecting him.

The Prophet (PBUH) and his Companions came to inspect the scene of the battle and bid farewell to its
martyrs. Pausing at Mus`ab's body, tears dripped from the Prophet's eyes. Khabbaab lbn Al-Arat narrated: We
emigrated with the Prophet (PBUH) for Allah's cause, so our reward became due with Allah. Some of us passed
away without enjoying anything in this life of his reward, and one of them was Mus`ab Ibn`Umair, who was
martyred on the Day of Uhud. He did not leave behind anything except a sheet of shredded woolen cloth. If
we covered his head with it, his feet were uncovered, and if we covered his feet with it, his head was
uncovered. The Prophet (PBUH) said to us, "Cover his head with it and put lemon grass over his feet."

The Prophet (PBUH) stood at the remains of Mus`ab lbn `Umair saying, while his eyes were flowing with tears,
love and loyalty, "Among the believers are men who have been true to their covenant with Allah" (33:23).

Then he gave a sad look at the garment in which he was shrouded and said, "I saw you at Makkah, and there
was not a more precious jewel, nor more distinguished one than you, and here you are bare-headed in a
garment!"

May Allah be pleased with you O Musab! And May he unite all of us with the prophet (pbuh) and his
companions in Jannah. AMEEN !!!

Dear Brothers/Sisters – Doesn’t Musab’s life teach us the strength of EEMAN ???

EEMAN is our Treasure – NEVER LOSE IT !!!

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 IN A NUTSHELL (A Poem)
An extremely wonderful untitled poem by a really wise, intelligent and creative Muslim brother.

By Mohammed Imran

*************
ALLAHU AKBAR

*************
It was early in the morning at four,
When death knocked upon a bedroom door,

Who is there? The sleeping one cried.

I'm Malkul Mawt, let me inside.

At once, the man began to shiver,

As one sweating in deadly fever,

He shouted to his sleeping wife,

Don't let him take away my life.

Please go away, O Angel of Death!

Leave me alone; I'm not ready yet.

My family on me depends,
Give me a chance, O please prepense!

The angel knocked again and again,

Friend! I'll take your life without a pain,

This your soul Allah requires,

I come not with my own desire.

Bewildered, the man began to cry,

O Angel I'm so afraid to die,

I'll give you gold and be your slave,

Don't send me to the unlit grave.

Let me in, O Friend! The Angel said,

Open the door; get up from your bed,

If you do not allow me in,

I will walk through it, like a Jinn.

The man held a gun in his right hand,

Ready to defy the Angel's stand.

I'll point my gun, towards your head,

You dare come in; I'll shoot you dead.

By now the Angel was in the room,

Saying, O Friend! Prepare for your doom.

Foolish man, Angels never die,

Put down your gun and do not sigh.
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Why are you afraid! Tell me O man,
To die according to Allah's plan?

Come smile at me, do not be grim,

Be Happy to return to Him.

O Angel! I bow my head in shame,

I had no time to take Allah's Name.

From morning till dusk, I made my wealth,

Not even caring for my health.

Allah's command I never obeyed,

Nor five times a day I ever prayed.

A Ramadan came and a Ramadan went,

But no time had I to repent.

The Hajj was already FARD on me,

But I would not part with my money.

All charities I did ignore,

Taking usury more and more.

O Angel! I appeal to you,

Spare my life for a year or two.

The Laws of Quran I will obey,

I'll begin SALAT this very day.

My Fast and Hajj, I will complete,

And keep away from self-conceit.

I will refrain from usury,

And give all my wealth to charity,

Wine and wenches I will detest,

Allah's oneness I will attest.

We Angels do what Allah demands,

We cannot go against His commands.

Death is ordained for everyone,

Father, mother, daughter or son.

I'm afraid this moment is your last,

Now be reminded, of your past,

I do understand your fears,

But it is now too late for tears.

You lived in this world, two score and more,

Never did you, your people adore.

Your parents, you did not obey,

Hungry beggars, you turned away.

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Your two ill-gotten, female offspring,
In nightclubs, for livelihood they sing.

Instead of making more Muslims,

You made your children non-Muslims.

You ignored the Mua'dhin Adhaan,

Nor did you read the Holy Quran.

Breaking promises all your life,

Backbiting friends, and causing strife.

From hoarded goods, great profits you made,

And your poor workers, you underpaid.

Horses and cards were your leisure,

Moneymaking was your pleasure.

You ate vitamins and grew more fat,

With the very sick, you never sat.

A pint of blood you never gave,

Which could a little baby save

O Human, you have done enough wrong,

You bought good properties for a song.

When the farmers appealed to you,

You did not have mercy, it is true.

Paradise for you? I cannot tell,

Undoubtedly you will dwell in hell.

There is no time for you to repent,

I'll take your soul for which I am sent.

The ending however, is very sad,

Eventually the man became mad

With a cry, he jumped out of bed,

And suddenly, he fell down dead.

O Reader! Take moral from here,

You never know, your end may be near
Change your living and make amends
For heaven, on your deeds depends.

If this poem inspires you,

It can help someone too.

**********************************************
What do you have for your END?
Take Care with: The END
The End

*************
ALLAHU AKBAR

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 SOME GOOD DUA’S FROM THE HOLY QUR’AN
Our Lord! Grant us good in this world and good in the life to come and keep us safe from the torment
of the Fire (2:201)

Our Lord! Take us not to task if we forget or fall into error. (2:286)

Our Lord! Let not our hearts deviate from the truth after You have guided us, and bestow upon us
mercy from Your grace. Verily You are the Giver of bounties without measure. (3:8)

Our Lord! Forgive us our sins and the lack of moderation in our doings, and make firm our steps and
succour us against those who deny the truth. (3:147)

Our Lord! And grant us that which you have promised to us by Your messengers and save us from
shame on the Day of Judgement. Verily You never fail to fulfill Your promise. (3:194)

Our Lord! We have sinned against ourselves, and unless You grant us forgiveness and bestow Your
mercy upon us, we shall most certainly be lost! (7:23)

Our Lord! Place us not among the people who have been guilty of evildoing. (7:47)

Our Lord! Grant that our spouses and our offspring be a comfort to our eyes, and give us the grace to
lead those who are conscious of You. (25:74)

Our Lord! You truly know all that we may hide [in our hearts] as well as all that we bring into the
open, for nothing whatever, be it on earth or in heaven, remains hidden from Allah (14:38)

Our Lord! In You we have placed our trust, and to You do we turn in repentance, for unto You is the
end of all journeys. (60:4)

************
Suggested Links:

Downloads(audio/video):
http://www.aswatalislam.net

Questions & Answers:

http://islamqa.com/index.php?ln=eng

Quran search:
http://www.islamicity.com/QuranSearch/

Islamic mag:
http://www.islamicamagazine.com/

Using modern science to analyse Islam:

http://www.harunyahya.com/

Islamic forum:
http://www.turntoislam.com/

Islamic website ratings:

http://www.bilalphilips.com/bilal_pages.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=246

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Strongly recommended book: A Search for Happiness. Author: Riaz Ansary Publication: Darul Huda.

Dear brothers and sisters,

As I close my pen for this book, I hope someone, somewhere, after reading my book will be inspired to look
back into their lives and assess themselves. I thank you for your patient reading. Any mistake you find here,
do not hesitate to tell me; I shall incorporate them in future reprints. Take care!
I’ll remember you in my duas InshaAllah, you remember me in your duas.

Assalaam Alaikum.

-Sklave Des Gottes.

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