A Warning for

Indian Bachelors

Essentialreadingformenplanningtogetmarriedin
India.





Lastupdated:Sept24,2012

Bewareofthelegalhavocthatyourwifecanunleash
onyouandyourinnocentfamilymembers.

Protectyourselfandyourfamilyfromyearsofimprisonment,
harassment,blackmail,extortionandfalselitigation
byanunscrupulousIndianwifeandherfamily.

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TableofContents

TableofContents.................................................................................................................................2
1)Introduction.....................................................................................................................................3
2)Whoarewe?....................................................................................................................................3
3)CurrentIndianLawsregardingMarriage..........................................................................................4
4.WarningSignsofanAbusivePersonalityandFuture498Agirl/family..............................................4
5. Precautions..................................................................................................................................5
5.1)Preliminaryprecautions...............................................................................................................5
5.2)Duringcourtship..........................................................................................................................6
5.3)DuringMarriageCeremonies.......................................................................................................7
5.4)AfterMarriage.............................................................................................................................8
6)Miscellaneous..................................................................................................................................8
7)FrequentlyAskedQuestions............................................................................................................8
8)Helplinesandwebsitesformenindistress.....................................................................................11
9)WhatcanIdo?...............................................................................................................................11
10.Addendum...................................................................................................................................12
10.1) IPC498A................................................................................................................................12
10.2) DowryProhibitionAct...........................................................................................................12
10.3) IPC406...................................................................................................................................12
10.3a)Istreedhan..............................................................................................................................13
10.4) DVAct....................................................................................................................................13
10.5) MaintenanceforwifeunderCrPC125/HMA24/Sec22DV..............................................14
10.6) Alimony.................................................................................................................................14
10.7) Adultery.................................................................................................................................14
10.8) Childcustodyandvisitation..................................................................................................14
10.9)Upcominggenderbiasedlaws.................................................................................................14
10.9a)Salarytowife.........................................................................................................................14
10.9b)IrBM(Irretrievablebreakdownofmarriage).........................................................................15
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1)Introduction
DearEligibleBachelor:

Soyouarethinkingofgettingmarried?Congratulations!Butbeforeyoustartonthiswonderful
newjourney,pleasebeawareofsomeIndianmarriagelawsthatcouldeasilydestroyyourlife,
sanity,reputationandassetsifyoumarrythewrongwoman.

You will be surprised to learn that in the year 2011 alone, as many as 1, 39,403 men
(husbands/husbands father/brothers/male relatives) and 41,298 women (husbands
mother/sisters/femalerelatives)werearrestedundersuchcruellaws.Understandably,in2011
itself over 62,000 Indian husbands committed suicide (i.e. a suicide every 9 minutes) because
of legal pressures and harassment unleashed on them by their wives and inlaws. With 1,
39,403cases(498A)happeningperyear,thisisasocialtimebomb!Pleasenotethattheselaws
are applicable only if you marry a girl from India, because no other country approves of such
ridiculouslyonesidedandgenderbiasedlaws.

Weknow,youareprobablythinkingthatthiswillneverhappentoyou.Well,wesincerelyhope
sotoo.Butpleasedoyourselfafavorandreadon,becausethisknowledgecouldprovetobea
lifesaverincaseyourwifeturnsouttobedifferentfromwhatshecurrentlyseemstobe.We
arenottryingtoscareyouofffrommarryingyourlovedone,butjustinformingyouofthetrue
and bitter experiences of millions of Indian men who ended up being jailed, harassed,
blackmailedandextortedbytheirunscrupulouswivesandinlaws.
2)Whoarewe?
Wearetheoneswhogothit.Nowwearetryingtosaveyou.

We are a group of voluntary activists who have so far saved thousands of innocent husbands
andtheirfamiliesfromgoingtojail(iftheycontactedusbeforeitwastoolate).Weofferhelp
free of cost and our members meet each week in their respective cities across the globe to
provide support to victims. We guide them how to defend themselves legally and make their
oppositionrunfortheirmoney.Wealsotryourbesttowarnpotentialvictims(likeyou)andwe
join our hands to oppose more such upcoming genderbiased laws that are currently being
drafted.

Our average age is 30, and most of us are well qualified engineers, doctors, and MBAs from
prestigiousinstitutionsinIndiaandabroad.Weweredoingverywellinourcareersbeforewe
foundourselvesdraggedintofalsecasesthatwerefabricatedbyourwivesandinlaws.Weall
have either faced/are facing/or are about to face such false accusations based on misuse of
Indianwomenorientedlaws.Manyofusandourfamilymemberswereforcedintojailsforno
faultofours.Whilesufferingduetosuchinhumanlawsourselves,werealizedtheimportance
oftimelyandaccurateinformationwhichwearenowspreadingthroughthisdocument.Even
if you never face the same nightmare as we did, pass this information on to someone who
mightbeharassedandvictimizedbyhiswifeandinlaws.
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3)CurrentIndianLawsregardingMarriage
Thecurrentlegalsysteminregardstomarriagelawsishighlyantimale.Therearemorethan15
antimale, inhuman and unconstitutional genderbiased laws which openly flout principles of
naturaljustice,andmanymoresuchlawsarecomingup(seeaddendumfordetails).Onceyou
are trapped, it is next to impossible to escape the nexus of feministlawyersjudges
government.Youmayneedanywherebetween5to10yearstoproveyourinnocence.Hereare
someofthemostdeadlyweaponsthatyourwifecouldusetoharmyouandyourparents.

Note:Becauseofrisingawarenessaboutmisuseofwomenorientedlaws,moreandmoremen
arerefusingtogetmarriedtoagirl/infamilywherefalse498Acasespreviouslyfiled.Wehave
found that such girls are generally doomed to a terrible life once they start false litigation
againsttheirhusbandsandinlaws.Itisverydifficultforthemtofindtheirnexthusbandwhen
theygettaggedas498awomen.Theyrealizethattheywilllikelylivealonefortherestoftheir
lives,andtherefore,theydragcasesincourtsagainsttheirformerhusbandstoextortasmuch
money as possible. If you are the one being trapped as their next husband, then please watch
out.Itisawellknownfactthat498Awomenarelikeleecheswhowilleventuallysucktheblood
oftheverymanwhofedher,lovedherandtookcareofher!

Therearevariouslawsthatarebeingmisusedbywomenagainsthusbandsyouneedtobe
awareof.ThesearediscussedmoreindetailintheAddendum,attheendofthisdocument.
4.WarningSignsofanAbusivePersonalityandFuture498Agirl/family
If your girlfriend/fianc or her family is displaying a combination of these behaviors, then you
mightbedealingwithapotential498Aabuser.

1. Her family: Is newlyrich. Likes to showoff their house/cars/paintings/relatives/

connections.Theyarerelatedtopoliticians/bureaucrats/lawyers/judges/policeofficers.
Theymaybelivingbeyondtheirmeans.Theymayhaveahistoryoffilingcasesagainst
anybody and everybody (search the website of the courts in their state of residence).
Theymaybeatuptheiremployees.Womenintheirfamilymayhavebeeninmorethan
onepreviousrelationship.
2. Commitment Pusher: She comes on very strong, claiming, "I've/weve never felt loved
likethisbyanyone/orsoclosetoanybody."Anabusivegirl/herfamilywillputpressure
ontheman/hisfamilyforanexclusivecommitmentalmostimmediately.
3. Jealous: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; smells your
jacketforperfumeresidue;checksyourshirtcollarforlipstickmarks;andgoesthrough
yourpocketssecretly.
4. Control freak: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you're late) about whom you
talked to and where you were; wants her name on all your assets and controls all the
money.Checksyourlaptop/mobileforpossiblecluesallthetime.
5. Unrealistic: Expects you to be the perfect man and meet her and her family's every
need,howeverunrealistic.
6. Divider&Ruler:Triestocutyouofffromfamilyandfriends;accusesyourwellwishers
of"causingtrouble.
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7. Attentionseeker:Thesegirlsarealwaysneedyandseekingattention.Theywouldnever
allowyoutomixsocially,especiallywiththeoppositesex,evenifsheisyourcousin.
8. Blamegamer: Boss/employee/exboyfriend/exhusband it's always someone else's
faultifanythinggoeswronginherlife.
9. Holds everyone else responsible for her own feelings: She will say "You make me
angryinsteadof,"Iamangryor,"You'rehurtingmebynotdoingwhatItellyou."You
wouldalmostneverhearhersay"Youmakemehappy".
10. Hypersensitive: Is easily insulted; claims that her feelings are hurt when she is really
mad.She'llrantabouthowunjustpeoplearetohereveniftheyarequitefair.
11. Unbalancedrigidsocietyroles:Expectsyoutoserveandobeyher/herfamilybutwould
neverfollowsocietalexpectationsofawoman.
12. Suddenmoodswings:Switchesfromsweetlylovingtoexplosivelyviolentinamatterof
minutesor,evenworse,seconds.Youllfeelyouarewalkingon"eggshells"allthetime.
13. Threatening: Makes statements like, "My parents will support me even if I murder
someone,"or"Awomanisalways right/thesystemshouldalwaysbelievethewoman,"
or "I will cut you up the way a fisherman slices a fish," and then dismisses her own
threats with, "Oh, everybody talks that way," or "I didn't really mean it." If things have
comethisfar,itishightimeyougethelpandgetoutbeforeitistoolate!
5. Precautions
There is NO sure shot formula to completely avoid being hit by false cases based on gender
biasedlaws.Soinsteadoftellingyoudontmarryatall,wehavecompiledsomepracticaltips
that you can use to protect yourself. If the girl you are planning to marry sounds like the one
described below, please stop before its too late. Save yourself and your family. There are
millionsofgoodgirlsoutthere.Continueyoursearchforanotherpartner,youwillsurelyfind
yoursoulmate.
5.1)Preliminaryprecautions
DONOTmarryinafamilyinwhichthegirl,sisterorevencousinseverfileda498Acase.
Our experience indicates that families in which women previously filed false dowry
cases will most likely file it in future. We strongly recommend to completely boycott
familiesthathavefiledfalse498Acases.

DOconductabackgroundcheckofherfamilyandverifythattheydonthaveacriminal
background/court cases/unlawful businesses, especially if the girl is from another city.
Useadetectiveifyoucanaffordone.Thismaysoundlikeawastagebutisworthit.

If this is her second marriage, then be even more cautious. Often such girls have
harassed her previous husband with such laws and possibly extorted large sums of
money from them. Check her divorce papers; seek information using RTI (Right to
InformationActof2005)fromherlocalpolicestationorcourt.Divorcepapersnotonly
mean Divorce decree. Please dont forget to see MOU (Memorandum of
Understanding)attachedwithit.

Trytoinvestigateifthegirlsfamilyhasapatternofquickdivorces.Ifso,youmightjust
bealinkinalongseriesofmenthatthisfamilyplanstoextortoneafteranother.
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If you believe in astrology, get an expert to do the matchmaking of not only gun
milaanbutalsocompleteKundlimilaan.
5.2)Duringcourtship
Bewaryofthepersonalitysignsdescribedinthesection5WarningSignsofanabusive
personalityandfuture498agirl/family.

Becautious,ifsheandherparentsarelivingbeyondtheirmeansandliketoflaunttheir
designer shoes, clothes, cars etc. Research and see if they have gone under a huge
amountofdebtjusttopretendtoberichandfamous.

Often498Afamilieshavepoliticalconnectionsandwouldusesuchconnectionstoabuse
the laws and threaten men for money. Check if they talk about such connections or
boastaboutthem.

If the girl or her parents casually talk about police, courts, laws, litigation etc, then be
verycautious.

Oftenthemotherofsuchgirlsdominatesthefather;andsistersofsuchgirlsdominate
theirhusbands.Youshouldbeabletospotthis.

Her parents might pretend to be very religious, honest and hardworking before the
marriage and slowly you might start to realize that they actually speak in a very foul
mouthedmanneramongstthemselves.Thisisaclearsignofatwofacedfamilythatyou
aremarryinginto.

If the girl you are about to get married to speaks in a very formal and submissive
mannertoyou,butspeaksinatotallydifferenttonewithherotherfamilymembersor
friends,thentreatthisasawarningsign.

Oftensuchgirlsareinsecureandstartfeelingjealousveryeasily.Youshouldbeableto
spot this. Try complimenting an actress on her beauty/figure or even acting skills, you
mightgettoseeaglimpseofwhatliesaheadofyou.

Oftensuchgirlssufferfromvariousmentalhealthdisorders.Common onesareBipolar
Affective disorder (also known as Manic Depressive disorder), Borderline Personality
Disorder,Depression,AnxietyandObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder.Checkhermedicines
andmedicalrecordsforthediagnosis.

Often such girls are vindictive and revengeful. Ask her the worst that she has done to
someone to teach him/her a lesson. This will give you an indication of how inhuman
theycanbewhenpushcomestoshove.

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The girl might often tell you during the courtship period that she has aterrible temper
wheneversheseesanyinjustice.Thismaysoundreasonableandcuteinitially,buttreat
this as a warning sign because after marriage, anything that does not go according to
herwishesmightbeinterpretedasaterribleinjusticeinhermind.

Oftensuchgirlshavemasteredtheartoflying.Theyhaveplentyofmenwantingthem
andtheyexpertlyexploitotherswiththeirsweettalk.Checkhowmanymaleandfemale
friendstheyhaveandwhatdotheirfriendssayabouther(especiallyothergirls).

During the courtship period, if the girl NEVER talks about her family members and
quicklychangesthesubjectifyouhappentoask,thendonotignorethiswarning.That
familymighthaveapastthattheydonotwishtodivulge.

Duringthecourtshipperiod,shemighttellyouthatsheisnotambitiousandwouldjust
like to stay at home and take care of you and your family. But as your marriage gets
closer to being finalized, she might start voicing her latent desires to study further
abroad,tostartworkingifshegetsboredathomeetc.Noneofthesethingsarewrong
by themselves, but wary of a girl who becomes ambitious in substantial increments as
therelationshipprogresses.

If the girl asks you questions in passing about who owns this house and in whose
name is that car, then be wary if such questions exceed a reasonable limit. Listen to
yourgutfeeling.Dontdisregardyourinstinctstheyaretheretoprotectyou.

If the girls family suddenly shifts to another city or changes their family business
immediatelybeforethewedding,thentreatthatasawarningsign.

If the girls family starts asking you for business favors, loans and investment in their
schemesevenbeforethewedding,treadcautiously.

Oftensuchgirlsortheirfamilywouldaskforyoursalaryslipand/orpropertydocuments
before marriage which should have no bearing on your marriage. Alarm bells should
startringinginyourheadiftheyaskyouforanyofthese.Thesearelaterusedbysuch
familiesincourttoextracthugeamountsofmoneyoffyou.
5.3)DuringMarriageCeremonies
IfherparentsinsistonalavishweddingDESPITEyoupressingforasimplewedding,then
thismightbeatrap.Pleasedonotputyourselforyourparentsatrisk.

DOpreparealistofallgiftsgivenortakenduringmarriage.Getitsignedbythebride
aswellasthebridegroom,alongwithtwowitnesses.

Her parents might behave questionably during the wedding. For example, if they are
videorecordingeverylittledetail,exchangeofgiftsetc.,theymightbepreparingtosue
youlateron.Beextracautiousifthisisthesecondmarriageofthegirl

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Ifyourinlawsaregiftingorpayingforexpensesthroughcheques/drafts,takethisasa
sureshotsign.

Grooms side also spends extensively but sometimes does not keep records of
purchasing expensive clothes, accessories, celebration expenses etc. DO keep all VAT
paidbills.

Alwayskeepthebillsofgoldandotherjewelrythatyoupurchaseforher.
5.4)AfterMarriage
If possible, DO NOT buy any property on your name till the time you are sure that you
havemarriedtherightperson.Itmighttakeafewyearstobecertain,butitisbetterto
besafethantobesorrytherestofyourlife.

DONOTdiscloseyourbankaccount/emailpasswordstoher,notatleastforthefirstfew
yearsintomarriage.
6)Miscellaneous
As you have read so far, she and her family members can misuse a whole array of draconian
laws to push you to the wall. There were cases where even the husbands 92 year old
grandmother and 6 year old nephew were arrested under false cases! You will need to keep
goingtocourtssincethegenderbiasedlawsmaketheStatefightagainstyou,andtheStatehas
no problem dragging the matter for decades. Its a business for everyone Police, Judicial
system,andthegirltheywillmakeloadsofmoneyoffofyou.Ifyourinlawshaveamalicious
bentofmindandGodforbidifyourwifehappenstomeetwithanaccidentorunnaturaldeath
within 7 years from the date of marriage, chances are that this event will be termed as a
dowrydeath and you will surely have a very hard time proving yourself and your family
innocent.Bailisalsonoteasyinsuchlaws(IPC304B)andtheburdentoproveyourselfinnocent
lies on you. They don't have to substantiate their accusations with proof to make your life a
livinghell.
7)FrequentlyAskedQuestions
IfIshoutatmyinselfdefensewife,canshefileacaseagainstme?
She could file a case against you claiming that you have harassed and tortured her with
domesticabuse.Shemaywishtoaddthe498Asectionalong.Dontevershoutather,evenin
selfdefense.
If I am slapped and kicked by my wife, even if it is unprovoked, can I charge her under
DomesticViolenceact?
Kindlyacceptourapologiestobreakthisnewstoyou.Youareaman.Youhavenosuchrights.
Youcantevenshoutback,letalonehit!
CanIhaveaprenuptialagreementthatwillsavemefromfutureproblems?
PrenuptialagreementsarenotvalidinIndia,hencewillbeofnouse.
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HowmuchfinanciallosswillIsufferifthingsdontworkoutbetweenmeandmywife?
Thereisnocertainwayoftelling.Giventhecurrentclimate,youmayenduplosingatleasthalf
ofallyourassets,irrespectiveofthedurationofyourmarriage.
IsthereabsolutelynowayIcanprotectmyself/myparentsifthingsgowronginfuture?
Although there is no 100% way to be completely safe, you can safeguard yourself and your
parentsbylearningfromthisdocument,andattendinglocalmeetingsofthesupportgroupas
soonaspossibleforfurtherdetailedsuggestions.
My sister wants to get married to a guy whose sister has filed a 498A case.
Pleaseprotectyoursisterfromthisfamily.Thisguymaybeabsolutelyfine,butawomanwho
has filed a 498A is likely to be vindictive and nasty. Please do not risk your sisters life by
marrying her in that family. A 498A woman is the most discontented woman you can find, so
keep your sister away from such a woman. Also, it is possible that her brother might have
himself provoked her to lodge the previous false complaints. He might cause trouble for your
sisterinfuturetoo.
Canyouprovidemewithagoodlawyeratlaterstage,ifrequired?
Wedonotadvertiseorsuggestanylawyersorlawagencies.Thesamelawyercouldturnoutto
be good for one and bad for another. But we can suggest that you get advice from a criminal
lawyerandnotcivilorfamilylawyer.
Isthereanypunishmentforawomanifshefilesfalsecases?
NO,thereisabsolutelynopunishmentforherevenifsheisprovedfalse.
My marriage is more than seven years old. I have heard that dowry complaint can only
befiledwithinsevenyears.Canshestillfilethesame?
Yes,verymuch.Sevenyearsrestrictionisnotapplicableto498A.
Isitagoodideatoemployadetectivetogatherbackgroundinformationonthegirl?
Money spent before difficulties arise is always better. We do not advertise any detectives;
howeveryoumaybeinclinedtousesomeonewhohasalreadybeensuccessfullyusedbyoneof
thevolunteersbefore.
Ifmywifetroublesmeinfuture,sheistheonewhowillsufferthemost,isntit?
Itshardtopredictandmeasuresuffering.Butaneasywaytounderstandthisisbyconsidering
suiciderates.Twiceasmanymarriedmencommitsuicidesthanmarriedwomen.Thinkaboutit.
Well, my mother and sister arealso women; they will have the samerights as my wife.
Theycanusetheirrightsandpowersagainstmywifeifrequired?
Yes and No. Unfortunately, the laws and ministries in India are made to support wives rather
thanwomenperse.Yourmotherandsistercansupportyouandhelpyousaveyourfamily,but
your wife will always have more legal and political power than them. The Indian legal
machinery works to protect the interest of one woman (wife) while denying the basic human
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rightstothreeorfourotherwomenofyourfamily(mother,sisters,sisterinlaws).Thisishow
theIndiangenderbasedlawswork,sadly.
Iamnotsureifyouaretellingthetruthhereorjusttryingtospreadmasspsychosis?
We are a social activist group. We give our time and efforts to help people likeyouand those
whoarealreadytrapped.Wesuggestthatyougoontheinternetandsearchfor498A,Legal
terrorism and misuse of gender biased laws. Then you can decide yourself how you wish to
planyourlifeahead.
Whatifoneofmyfriendsismarriedtosomeonewhohasafamilymemberwhofileda
498Ainthepast?
If you are a good friend, you can do two things. Advise him to contact us immediately and
secondlyprayforhim.Anapologyforthecomparisondrawnhere,buta498Awomanislikea
rabid animal if you are bitten, the chances of your survival are almost nil, unless you
immediately seek medical attention. This answer comes from a doctor who has experienced a
498Awoman.
IaminLovewiththisgirlandIwanttomarryherdespiteknowingthathersisterfileda
498Aonherprevioushusband.WhatshouldIdo?
Loveisabeautifulfeelingandwerespectandappreciatethat.Endoftheday,itisyourchoiceif
youwishtotaketheriskornot.Wewouldsuggestafewthingsasmentionedinthisdocument
tosafeguardyourselfandyourelderlyparentswhodeserveapeacefulretirementafterhaving
workedhardalltheirlivestosupportyouandyoursibling(s).Although,westronglyadviseyou
NOTtomarryinsuchafamily.
LetssayIignorethiswarningdocumentandgetmarried.Wouldyoudeclinetohelpme
ifIcametoseekyourhelpinfuture?
Weareasocialactivistgroup,andprovidefreesupportirrespectiveofcaste,creedandreligion.
We would not decline any support to you but would rather feel even sorrier for you. Almost
everyone who comes to us has already committed that mistake in naivety. You may wish to
learnfromyourownmistakesorthemistakesofothers.Thechoiceisyours.
IfIdon'tgetmarriedandstayinaliveinrelationship,howsafewillIbe?
Apartfromthedowrylaw(498A),shecanstillfileDomesticViolence,maintenanceandrape
chargesagainstyouifthingsdontgoherway.Sobecareful.
IamnotaHindu;allthesegenderbiasedlawsareagainstHindus.AmIright?
Justasterrorismdoesntlookatreligion;498Atoodoesnthaveanyrestrictiononthebasisof
religion.Wehaveactivistsandvictimsfromallreligions.
I am a rich guy. I dont need money or dowry from anyone. I am sure if my wife
complains,thePoliceandJudiciarywillbeabletoseethroughhertrap.Isntit?
You are right; they are likely to see through the trap. Most police officers and judges know
aboutthelawsbeingmisused.ButthePoliceofficerswanttoextractmoneyoutofyouandthe
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judgesdontwanttogoagainstthefeminists.Youwillhavetobedraggedintothecourtroom
andmaybeintojailtillyouproveyourinnocence.
Iamapoorguy.ThegirlIammarryingisrich.Cansheaskformaintenanceandalimony
ifweweretogoseparateways?
Yesshecan.Itdoesnotmatterifherfinancialstatusishigherthanyours.Remember,itisaone
waytraffic.MoneyalwaysflowsfromMantowomanintheIndianlegalsystem.
Well I have read the law. It says giving and receiving dowry both are offences. So if my
wife's family claims that I received dowry, then they are also committing an offence. Would
theynotbeequallyguiltyandhencebepunished?
Yes and No. Yes they are guilty as per the law, but they will not be punished. Even if you
complaintothePolicethatyourinlawsaregivingyoudowryagainstyourwishes,theywillnot
be punished. Such is the law unfortunately and hence men suffer. This is exactly the kind of
injusticethatwefightagainst.
P.S:IfindoubtaboutanyoftheseFAQs,youmaywishtovisityourlocalPolicestation
andcheckinformallyabouttheselaws,oryoumayvisitthelocalfamilycourtorevena
simpleGooglesearchmightbesufficient.Betterstill,visitusduringourweeklymeetings
wherewehelpvictimsofsuchmisuse.Preventionisalwaysbetterthancure.
8)Helplinesandwebsitesformenindistress
Pleasedonthesitatetocontactanyonefromyourcityinthelistavailableonthewebsite.The
longeryoudelay,thedeeperyouwillsink,andtheharderitwillbeforyouandyourfamilyto
survivethetrauma.

All help lines are managed by former victims themselves and they do not charge anything for
advice.Incaseanyoneasksyouforanymoney,pleasebringthisintoournotice.
http://savefamily.org/index.php?Itemid=65&option=com_content
9)WhatcanIdo?
Dependingonyourcurrentsituation,thereisalotyoucando:
Youshouldstopjudgingothermennegativelyassoonasawomancomplainsagainstthem.
You should question social constructs which force men to earn manhood or suffer abuse
becauseitisconsideredunmanlytoraisevoiceagainstit.
Youshouldchallengeallformsofantimaleattitudes,lawsandmediacontent.
You should be aware of such incidents in your area and support the family against these
biasedlaws.
YoushouldstopbelievingthatGirls/Womenarealwaysrightandmenarealwayswrong.
You must join a Mens organization locally and fight against misuse of such gender biased
lawsespeciallyifyouhavesufferedbecauseofthese.Ifthereisnosuchlocalorganization,
thenstartoneyourselfandotherswouldjoin.
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10.Addendum

Pleasereadaboutthevariouslawsthatarebeingmisusedbywomentoharasshusbandsandtheir
families.Thisisonlyanoverviewofthelaws.Youmaywishtogatherdetailedinformationfromusor
fromyourfamilylawyer.
10.1) IPC498A
You might be amazed to learn about the amount of legal ammunition that the Indian
government provides to a wife under section IPC 498A. Imagine if you have a small
disagreementwithyourwifeandshe(throughherownwillorinstigatedbysomeonein
her family)decides to teachyou a lesson and writes a short letter to the police station
sayingthatyouarebeingcrueltoherandharassingherfordowry.Shemightchooseto
becreativeandcookupimaginaryincidentsofcrueltytoherself.Suddenly,youwillfind
yourself (and your parents, siblings, their spouses and even distant relatives) in jail!
Yourjailsentencemightbeextendeduptothreeyears.Youmighthavetopaycrores
of Rupees and all your assets to get out of that nightmare. Once you are in that web,
you are at the mercy of your wife and inlaws and might have to bow to their
unreasonabledemands.

498Aisthemostdangerouscriminalprovisionacrosstheglobeinmatrimonialdisputes.
As long as you keep following your wifes orders like a lamb, all will be fine, but if you
dare to disobey her (including her demand to dump your own parents and start
supporting her parents instead) you/your parents/relatives/friends everybody will be
booked under IPC 498A. It is nonbailable and there is no undo for it once your wife
slapsitonyouandyourfamily.Therearehundredsofsuchvictimsandhorrorstoriesin
India. A simple Google search on the matter will reveal the shocking truth. Please read
moreaboutitatwww.498a.org
10.2)DowryProhibitionAct
Youareaneducated,hardworking,modernmanwhodoesnotbelieveinthetraditional
practicesofdowry.Goodforyou!Butletssaythatatyourwedding,yourwifesfamily
(through their own free will), decides to gift you a watch/flat/ car/electronics, clothes,
furniture, and any form of shagun. Fair enough, its a gift that they gave you to show
their love and affection. But then one day, you get a legal notice saying that your wife
has complained that you and your parents are dowryseeking demons who forced her
and her family to give you those very items as dowry! For extra effect, she might also
add a few crores worth of other imaginary items allegedly given to you as dowry. The
law will blindly believe her and ask you to pay back immediately. Though you are
completely innocent, it will take you approximately 7 years in court to prove your
innocence.Everythingthattheygiveyou(evenforcibly)willbefalselytermedasdowry
demandedbyyou.
10.3)IPC406
Onefinedaywhenyoucomebackfromwork,yourealizethatsheisgoneandhastaken
allherjewelryandotherexpensiveitemsfromyourhouse(includingtheoneyou/your
parents gave her). But then, you find out that YOU are slapped with section 406 for
criminal breach of trust on misappropriation of "Istreedhan". (Anything and everything
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giventoawomanatmarriagecanbecountedasIstreedhan.Seeaddendumonthelast
pagefordetails).Thensomedayslater,yourwifecancometoyourhouseaccompanied
by the Police to reclaim her items. Whatever she lays her finger on, the Police will
believe it to be hers and take it away from your house like legalcoolies. You will not
beabletodoanythingtostopthismadness.
Ifyouyourselfhappentobearrestedundersection406,thenyouwillnotbeabletoget
bail as this offence is nonbailable. Most husbands victimized this way spend at least 1
monthinjailonaverageforNOfaultoftheirs.Itisalmosttooeasyforawomantoget
youandyourfamilypronouncedascriminalseventhoughsheistheburglarherself.
10.3a)Istreedhan
Istreedhan is a traditional practice that was primarily meant to provide women with
some level of economic security in adverse situations like divorce, widowhood, etc.
AmongHindus,itisinterpretedinvariousways;ingeneral,Istreedhanisdefinedasthat
portionofawomanswealthoverwhichshealonehasthepowertosell,gift,mortgage,
lease or exchange whole or in parts. Usually, Istreedhan is passed from mother to
daughter, unless the woman decides otherwise. Any dues from her can also be
recoveredfromherIstreedhan.

Besides ornaments and trousseau given at marriage, Istreedhan also includes all the
gifts of money, property, jewelry etc. received by the woman before, during and after
marriage from her family, her husbands family, friends and even strangers. It includes
property inherited by the woman from her family or husbands family; property
received by her under a compromise, adverse possession or in lieu of maintenance;
property obtained in partition; and property bought using proceeds from Istreedhan.
However, gifts to the husband by the woman or her relatives will not be part of her
Istreedhan. In the case of a working woman, the law under Section 14 of the Hindu
Succession Act, 1956 enumerates that the property acquired by means of a womans
earnings,duringhermaidenhoodaswellaswidowhood,isherIstreedhan.
10.4)DVAct
Evenifyou,oranyofyourfamilymembers,makealightheartedremarktoherthatshe
does not like, she can go ahead and slap a DV (Domestic Violence) case on you. Per
Indianlegalsystem,shedoesnotneedanyprooftodothis.ThenshewillmisusetheDV
lawtoobtainaProtectionOrder/ResidenceOrdertothrowyouandyourparentsoutof
yourownhouse.ShewillbeabletocontinuelivinginYOURhouse(possiblywithanew
boyfriend).Inaddition,shecanmakeYOUpayherahandsomemonthlymaintenanceto
liveluxuriouslywhileyouareoutonthestreetsgrindingyourteeth.

Shecanconvenientlyuseanydefinitionofabusetoframeyouasanabuserinfrontof
the Police or the Judge. For instance, even name calling is punishable under DV law!
She will get away with fabricating all kinds of ridiculous stories against you (e.g. you
have been physically hurting, scaring, and harassing her), and YOU will have to prove
your innocence. Furthermore, she can do all of the above to your parents and family
members as well. This DV act is NOT forprotecting males. Even if your wife or mother
inlawslapsyou/beatsyou,youcannotdoanything.Asyoucanimagine,suchawoman
canthreatenyouintolivinglikeadoginyourownhouse. Unfortunately,thisisquickly
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becoming the reality of most modern Indian marriages. Simply search on the internet
fortheDVlawandyouwillbeshocked.
10.5)MaintenanceforwifeunderCrPC125/HMA24/Sec22DV
ShecanaskyouformaintenanceunderALLthesesectionsandasperrecentjudgments;
youwillhavetomaintainheratthesamelivingstandardsthatshewasaccustomedto
before marriage or after marriage, whichever is higher. If your wife is the greedy type,
shemayalsoasktoincreasehermaintenanceamountincaseyougetasalaryhikeeven
after years of separation! People have even been asked to sell their kidneys to pay
maintenanceamountsorelsegotojail.
10.6)Alimony
She will ask for the sky when it comes to Alimony. Since she will project herself as an
"ablanaari"intheeyesofthecourt,shewilllikelygetwhatsheasksfor.Thedemandof
Alimony starts from a few crores these day for those living in metropolitan cities. For
those living in smaller cities, it roughly starts from 1 crore and finally depends on your
ability to negotiate with your wife and inlaws. You can decide for yourself which
category you fall into and what amount would might have to shell out in future. NRIs
areaneasytargetforextortionthroughalimonyandmaintenance.
10.7)Adultery
Adulteryisvoluntarysexualintercoursebetweenamarriedpersonandsomeoneother
than the lawful spouse. If you find out that your wife is adulterous, you cannot file for
divorceJUSTonthatbasis.Forexample,evenifyoufoundoutthatyourwifehadaone
night stand yesterday, the court will say that she WAS living in adultery but she IS
yourwifeNOWwhomyouHAVETOsupportandmaintain.Thisisthecaseevenifyou
catchyourwiferedhanded.ThemostyouwillbeabletodoistofileacaseofAdultery
on her paramour (your wife will be immune to any legal prosecution under the Indian
legalsystem).So,twomenwillfightwhileshewillmoveontosomeoneelse.However,
you, being a man, dont enjoy any such privileges. Heavens forbid, if YOU make the
mistakeofhavinganextramaritalaffair,shewillcauseallhelltobreaklooseonyou.She
canfilefordivorce,seekalimonyandmaintenance.Youwillloseyourkidsifany,your
marriage,socialstanding,moneyandotherassets.
10.8)Childcustodyandvisitation
Ifyouhavebeenblessedwithchildren,thenbereadytobeseparatedfromthem.Indian
familycourtsareverybiasedandifthechildisyoung,inmostofthecases,custodywill
be given to mothers. You will simply be turned into a giver of monthly cheques with
small Chitrahaar types weekly visitation rights. Remember, there is nothing more
exciting in thisworld, than having a child that is yours, and nothing more tragic than
havinghimforcedtobeastrangertoyou.
10.9)Upcominggenderbiasedlaws
10.9a)Salarytowife
The Union Ministry of Women and Child Development is currently drafting a new law
that will make it mandatory for a husband to pay a definite amount from his monthly
income to his wife. This law will not care whether she has a job or not, whether you
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yourself help out with household chores or not, or whether you spend lavishly on her
anyway.You,asthehusbandwillberequiredtopayherasalary,butyouwillnothave
anyrighttojudgeherperformance.
10.9b)IrBM(Irretrievablebreakdownofmarriage)
While taking marriage pheras you are basically signing on a 50% transfer deed of all
your assets (but not your liabilities) with the girl. She can easily file for Divorce under
new IrBM and you will not even have right to oppose her case. This will be a new gift
from the Indian government to all wives. It does not matter how long it took and how
difficultitwasforyoutobuildthoseassets,itdoesnotmatterhowlongyouhavebeen
married, it does not matter if the assets were built before marriage. What matters is
that if she wants what you have, she will get at least half of it. Not only that, she can
similarly continue to fool other men and snatch halves of their assets as well. As with
othergenderbiasedIndianlaws,you,thehusband,cannotdemandasinglepaisafrom
herirrespectiveofherwealth.

Picture this: After years of hard work, you buy a nice and comfortable house for your
family. You are payingmonthly installments to the bank for, say, next15 years totruly
own your house. Now, you get married to your dream girl, and for some reason, the
verynextweekshedecidestowalkoutofthemarriage.Well,indoingso,shewalksout
with a legal right to 50% of the total value of your house. However, she will have 0%
responsibility towards the bank payments that will be coming out of YOUR pocket for
the next 15 years. This ridiculous law has not been passed yet, but it very well might
havebythetimeyoureadthis.Findoutmoreatwww.rollbackirbm.in

Have a happy and safe married life.