Online Safety Primer For Parents (Handouts)

Online Safety Guide for Parents 1 | P a g e

Online Safety Guide for Parents

Artwork by Stairway Kids

Copyright: Stairway Foundation Inc. 2013
Stairway Foundation Inc.
Brgy Aninuan, Puerto Galera
Oriental Mindoro, Philippines 5203
stairway@stairwayfoundation.org
www.stairwayfoundation.org


Foreword and acknowledgements:

Sexual abuse and exploitation of children has always been a problem. However, along with the rise of
technology and advancements in communication new forms of sexual abuse and exploitation have
evolved, and ease of accessibility has increased the risks and dangers to children. Children need to be
protected from harm of sexual abuse and exploitation, which requires information and education on
risks, along with raised awareness on protective behavior, in our physical world as well as online.
As a child protection organization, Stairway has been working on the issue of child sexual abuse for more
than 15 years. Having developed creative and effective tools and methodologies for child sexual abuse
prevention education, the organization has strived to make the issue an agenda of multiple stakeholders.
However, it was only after participating in a regional conference facilitated by the Center for Exploitation
and Online Prevention (CEOP) back in 2007 that our organization recognized that there was a whole new
and extremely fast growing trend in the use of the internet and technology in perpetration of child sexual
abuse.
The scope and the gravity of this technology related threat to childrens safety came to us as a
revelation, and we responded by immediately launching the creation of a localized online safety program
to complement our existing child sexual abuse prevention program.
This online safety guide for parents was made in order to give parents the basic understanding on what
children and young people do online today their online culture, why online life is fun for them, what
risks they face, and how can parents minimize these risks.
We hope that this material would be of help to parents who sometimes, feel helpless because of the lack
of basic knowledge about the internet and how children use them.

Lars C. Jorgensen
Executive Director
Stairway Foundation, Inc.


1. What do children and young
people do online?

2. What are the online risks to
children and young people?

3. What is online grooming?

4. How will I know if my child is
being groomed online?

5. Where should I place the
computer in our home?

6. How do we do software
blocking?

7. If I have an online concern,
whom should I tell?

8. What can I do as a parent?

Content

With todays generation of children and young people, the internet is
considered as an extension of their offline life. The internet is so intertwined
with their everyday life, that when you ask children and young people what
they would prefer if asked to choose between the internet and television,
most children would prefer the internet.
During the last online safety survey done by Stairway, children said the top
things they do today on the internet are the following:
Do research for their assignments
Play online games
Go on Facebook
Chat
Social Media (like Facebook, Twitter, etc.) is usually the biggest draw for
children and young people. Based on the Stairway 2012 survey, 8 out of 10
children between the ages of 10 and 17 maintained a Facebook account.
Children treat their online life as extensions of their real life. They socialize
with friends and find new friends, they play, they find their interests, and
they treat the internet as a venue to express themselves.
As parents, we have to understand, and more importantly, accept, that the
internet will be a permanent fixture of childrens life. Majority of them are
native online residents meaning that they are not familiar with a life
with no internet. If we can grasp this reality, then we are in a better position
to assess the risks children face, and take measures in order to make
childrens online experiences a positive one.

What do children and young people do online?


Although the internet presents a world of opportunity for children and
young people, it also presents certain risks which are inherent to the
medium. Two major aspects of the internet which contributes to the risk
include:
Accessibility: Information is readily available online, and we have to
recognize that not all of this information is appropriate for children.
Anonymity: The perceived impersonal nature of the internet causes
children to take risks they would not
ordinarily take in face to face interpersonal
encounters, not realizing that the risk of
abuse remains

Major online risks children encounter today include the following;
Exposure to indecent online materials
Private digital information not being managed properly
Cyberbullying
Game addiction
Online Grooming

What are the online risks to children and young
people?

In a 2012 survey, we found out that
89% of 10-17 year olds accessed the
internet, with 43% accessing from
Internet Cafes, and 27% at home

Based on the information we got from children during our online safety
sessions, exposure to online pornography has taken the place of traditional
media pornography (print, optical media) for first time exposure of children.
Our 2012 survey shows that 5 out of 10 in 10-12 years old age range have
seen online pornography, while 7 out of 10 in the 13-17 years old age range
have seen online pornography
The Top 3 online pornography mediums seen by children are Pictures (33%),
Videos (26) and animation (19%).
During our Online Safety sessions, we have encountered children as young
as 7 and 8 years old, who are very much familiar with pornographic websites
and volunteer website links when asked. The concerning thing is that online
indecent materials are easily accessible by children because the proper
safety checks are usually not in place.

people?

Exposure to indecent online
materials like pornography

At an age where its important to be popular, children, and mostly teenagers
today see social networking sites and accepting as many online friends as
possible as one sign of popularity. A 14 year-old with 200 Facebook friends
might be more popular than a classmate with only 100 friends. Giving out
their private digital information - photos, putting up journals, profiles
indicating phone numbers, addresses, etc., leads to one scary reality:
children generally dont see the dangers involved in putting up such
information online, and online predators know that and exploit it.

Our 2012 survey showed that 8 out of 10 children aged 10-17 years old had
Facebook accounts.

Traditionally, child sex offenders have to go thru great lengths in order to
secure information from target children, such as full names, birthday,
address, who their friends are, hobbies and interests, etc. But, with todays
Social Media culture of personal information sharing, which includes
children and young people; this is now offered without any great effort to
the child sex offender

Children dont usually realize that information you shouldnt share in real
life to strangers, should also not be shared online with online strangers (e.g.
online friends that they have not met in real life)

Private digital information
not being managed properly
people?


Cyberbullying as a violation of childrens rights is just slowly being noticed in
the Philippines. But ever since the emergence of social media as an
accessible tool for children and young adults (Friendster), some form of
cyberbullying has been in existence. It is only now with the increased
utilization of social media that cyberbullying has emerged as a noticeable
trend.) Various forms of cyber-bullying include, but are not limited to photo-
editing, online heckling, setting up of fake social media profiles to ridicule
and direct social media threats.
The biggest concern with cyberbullying is the fact that bullying doesnt end
in school, but also continues even when the child goes home. It is also far
more reaching as the audience is larger, and is not limited to the immediate
peers of the child. The cyberbully can also remain anonymous as
cyberbullies can create fake profiles in order to ridicule a particular child.

Based on our online safety survey last 2012, 39% of our respondents
experienced some form of cyberbullying. 30% their photos were edited, 22%
received direct threats while 17% didnt specify what form of bullying they
have received online. Majority of cyberbullies were their own classmates
(42%), followed by children they also know, but from other schools. 19% said
that they did not know personally the cyberbullies, but the names were
displayed while 19% said the bully was anonymous.

Cyberbullying

people?


Whenever one goes to Internet cafs in the Philippines, one can observe
that the primary costumers would be groups of young children and
teenagers. Based on informal interviews with Internet Caf owners, the
majority of costumers engage in online and network games, with internet
access for browsing and social media access coming in second. Boys aged
between 8-16 years old are the typical profile of children engaging in these
online and network games.
Online games are usually Role Playing Games where children have to
develop online characters by having these characters level up. Leveling up
would entail playing the character for a certain period of time in the online
world and collecting game experience and items. The more experience, the
faster the leveling up, and a high level character means a stronger character.
Items (depending on the nature of the online game) are collected in order to
assist in the online role playing game. Addiction to online games is being
reported with children going online for extended periods of time.
Network games on the other hand doesnt require an internet connection,
but are rather played through local area networks of the computer shops.
Children would form teams (usually 5 per team) and play against each other.
Popular network games include CS (Counterstrike) a military style 1st person
shooter and DOTA (Defense of the Ancients), a fantasy strategy game. These
team competitions would most of the time involve betting money (around
100 per team member). Addictions are so high that children would tell us
Pag DOTA, puyatan at butasan ng bulsa (If you play DOTA, you lack sleep
and you run out of money).

Game addiction

people?


Online grooming is defined in Philippine law under RA 9775 or the anti-child
pornography law:
Luring" refers to the act of communicating, by means of a computer system,
with a child or someone who the offender believes to be a child for the
purpose of facilitating the commission of a sexual activity or production of
child pornography.
"Grooming" refers to the act of preparing a child or someone who the
offender believes to be a child for a sexual activity or sexual relationship by
communicating child pornography. It includes online enticement, or
enticement through any other means
Traditionally, this is done by the offender interfacing with the community,
and in particular, the parents or adults surrounding the child, and the child
him/herself. However, with the internet and in particular social media, the
process of grooming children has made it easier for offenders to directly link
up with children with lessened safeguards from adults.
Direct and private messaging are used as vehicles by child sex offenders to
contact children, and unfortunately, most parents are left unaware about
this potential risk. Online grooming also bridges the gap between what is
non-physical in nature (online child sex abuse) to the physical thru EB
(eyeballs or personal meet-ups) facilitated thru online grooming.

What is online grooming?


Not unless we talk to children directly or catch the online grooming itself,
will we know if our children are being groomed. But there are certain signs
and indicators that might help us detect early if online grooming is
happening:

Excessive and aggressive use of the Internet
Secretive behavior with regards to internet usage (switching screens
when someone sees them accessing the internet)
Increased use of sexualized language, which is not proper for the age
of the child
Withdrawal from the usual social circles or activities
Sudden influx of cash

If we notice any of these signs, we should talk to children in order to address
the behavior (but not accuse the child of engaging in online grooming).

How will I know if my child is being groomed
online?

As much as possible, computers should be placed in the common living area.
This sends signals to children that surfing the internet should be a family
activity, or at least, things we do on the internet are things that should be
safe for them as children.
As children grow up (e.g. become teenagers), computer placement may
change, but again, it depends on the safeguards the family has placed to
institute online safety at home.

No filtering software will be 100% be able to block indecent content online,
however, if used together with online safety tips, it can be a good way to
minimize the risks children might face online.
There are commercially available filters, but there are good ones which are
available for free non-commercial use. Examples of which are K9 webfilter
http://www1.k9webprotection.com/ or Open DNS
http://www.opendns.com/ . Although these solutions will need a certain
level of computer proficiency in terms of program installation or dns
configuration, what parents can do is to find other adults who can assist
them in setting up these filters.

Where should I place the computer in our home?

How do we do software blocking?


Depending on the online concern, we should report it to the local school
authorities (cyber-bullying) or to law enforcement (online grooming, online
child sexual abuse).
For the law enforcement, we can report our online concerns to the
Philippine National Police thru Project Angelnet: www.cidgangelnet.ph
Or The NBI Cybercrimes division: http://www.nbi.gov.ph/divisions.html
Contact numbers are available in the weblinks, or we can contact our local
police in order to facilitate linking with the said national law enforcement
offices.

If I have an online concern, whom should I tell?


Children should be made aware of the following safety tips when using the
internet with regards to pornography and online social activities:
Remind them to be selective in giving out personal information over
the internet, such as mobile phone numbers, street addresses,
birthdays, etc. It would be alright to post personal information if for
example they know personally all of their contacts in their social
networking sites. Or if they make this information private, so only
trusted contacts can access.
Remind them that not all people over the internet are really who they
claim to be. Explain to children that some people will make them feel
special in order to establish trust for eventual abuse.
Tell them that if they dont feel comfortable with a particular question
or conversation, they dont have the obligation to answer that
question or continue the conversation, and that it is their right to
reject anything that they dont feel comfortable with.
Help them understand that having online friends is ok, but they have
to remember that they should not forget that they still have friends in
the offline world. And having 5000 FB friends is not really cool.
Always assure them that if they feel confused, scared or angry, they
can approach you and talk to you about anything, and that you would
understand and face the concerns with him/her.
Install filtering and blocking software at home.
These are just few of the tips adults can discuss with children. The most
important thing is to maintain an open line of communication between the
parent and the child, and make the child feel that there is not one thing that
is so bad that he/she cant talk to you about it.
What can I do as a parent?


All rights reserved. No part of this document shall be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted by any means electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise without
written permission or consent from Stairway Foundation

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