The Latest Truths about Parenting in Working Mother Households

There is a study about parenting done in Britain recently that finds that workin
g women who leave their children on a daily basis while going out to work, risk
raising children who come to have poor eating habits and poor exercise tendencie
s. It is called the UK Millennium Cohort Study. The research draws from a study
of nutritional and physical activity habits of more than 10,000 children under
five. And before anyone tries to counter these findings by calling into doubt th
e meaningfulness of the sample used (or wondering if the researchers may have be
en neglected children themselves), the study seems to have taken all kinds of po
ssibilities into account, adjusting for the race, education and the financial po
sitions of the mothers involved.
So what is it that these children do that distresses the researchers so much? Th
e researchers found that mothers who worked even part-time, came home to find th
at their children resist fruits and vegetables more. They have a worse televisio
n or computer habit too, when compared to children of stay-at-home mothers. Thes
e children are often seen to use passive entertainment like computer games and t
elevision more than two hours a day - far more than what stay-at-home moms would
allow. And while homemaker mothers found that their children could keep their s
nacking habits under control, working moms have children who keep reaching for u
nhealthy snacks or colas. So what is it that the researchers wish to say about p
arenting out of all this?
To begin with, they feel that there is nothing to it other than the fact that wo
rking parents have less time to stay around and provide a good example for how c
hildren should eat and live their lives. Even work arrangements where mothers ge
t to work from home a good part of the time do not seem to really help. Apparent
ly, even a short stint at work by a mother affects children. Of course this stud
y is extremely unpopular with women, and we can see why. It seems to suggest tha
t if women care about their children, they should give up all their dreams, or f
eel guilty for the rest of their lives. But the women who sit on the other side
of the fence feel their views have finally been vindicated.
In the end, one does have to wonder about why the studies about parenting choose
to villainize the women, the mothers who choose to work, but end up neglecting
their children. What is wrong with blaming the father for neglectful child-reari
ng, one wonders. Why cant women have their dreams like men do, and yet have a ca
red for set of children that both the parents take turns to rear well. And while
we are on the subject of funny studies, did you hear the one that claims that c
hildren who are spanked, grow up with lower IQs? Apparently, it is a question of
trauma, plain and simple. A child who is subjected to trauma, is less available
, mentally, to learn. This was a study conducted over a five-year period. Most w
ould argue that that was hardly adequate - it is as good as it gets.