The Shameless

Truth Report
Justin was relieved to finally get enough space to pry Sarahs clingy
desperation away from him, just long enough to finally get a night out with the guys.
Most of them were tied up with their own obsessive wives and girlfriends, but Justin
didnt mind, because at least Chris was free to shoot the bull, like they used to do in
old times.
efore Justin could even get his coat on, Sarah had managed to pry herself onto his
phone, demanding to make certain that no !new! contacts better be appearing on his
phone, because she had !memori"ed! e#actly how many contacts he had.
$hinking that she was beyond cra"y, he was happy to finally convince her to in the
very least, let him leave, as long as he promised to leave his phone on. %f course he
promised, but the minute he got in his car, he made damn sure to &uickly turn that
nightmare off.
'inally free, to be himself, in what felt like ages, ideas of his clingy and psycho
girlfriend began to slink away as he partied the night away with Chris. $hat was the
beauty of having guy friends, is that they never over complicated things. Men didnt
bring their feelings into the mi#, every step of the way. Men just simply did things,
and that was it.
Justin felt all of his tension melt away as he finally found an emotional freedom that
he had been longing for, for ages, with just one simple night out. 'inally able to rela#,
and be himself, Justin found himself pressured to wonder if Chris was feeling the same
kind of pressure.
Chris had been in a married relationship, for ( years now, and was a loyal and good
guy, but even though that was true, Justin had to wonder if sometimes it was normal
to feel this M)C* pressure from a woman.
+t didnt take long, naturally, for him to begin asking Chris about how things were with
his wife, and if he ever had ,problems in his marriage.
'inally in a position to shoot the bull, and be brutally honest about his situation for
once, without having to worry about the backlash, Justin finally admitted out loud, for
the first time ever, that he really didnt know what to do with a woman like Sarah.
!+ just feel like we are so different from one another, and like she is on one e#treme,
after another, no matter what + do. + mean she is beyond clingy and obsessive and the
more + try to talk to her about it, the worse she gets.!, Justin had e#plained.
$he words had slipped so easily out of Justins mouth too, with no feelings of shame
or guilt rising up. +t was the truth after all. -hy should he feel bad about the truth.
/aturally, Chris, being the down to earth kind of guy that he was, agreed, telling
Justin, 0*ey man, + know e#actly what you mean. efore + met my wife, + dated this
girl named Justine, it was just cra"y. 1ou know she was good in other ways, but most
of the time, she was just a psycho. She began calling up my friends asking them
where + was, when + was not around her, and then she began te#ting me every
second. Can you believe that.
$hen she got pregnant after only 2 weeks of knowing her, and blamed me for it, even
though + hadnt even been intimate with her yet. + was just like, man. + mean how
desperate can you get. + reali"ed fast that + didnt want this, and + dumped her real
fast.
$urns out she lied about being pregnant anyway. So glad, that + got out as &uick as +
got in, and now + am happily married to the right woman, so + guess everything
worked out. Maybe you need to reassess your situation too. +f shes really making you
feel that miserable, why dont you just leave.!
Justin couldnt help but agree, feeling e&ually as pressured by Sarah in the
relationship, to almost unreasonable levels, he revealed !1eah, you know + just dont
know what to do with Sarah. + care about her, but shes just going too far, you know.
+ mean, + had to turn my phone off just to be able to have a night out to myself. + bet
if + turn it on right now there will be 3 missed calls, and a ton of te#t messages. +ts
just cra"y. 4ike she doesnt own me. 1ou know. + own me.!
Chris &uickly consoled Justin, by reminding him that he was always free to leave, and
that he should never invest something that he felt was ,cra"y, and that chicks like that
were just a dime a do"en anyway.
5greeing with this reality, Justin decided that he was going to ignore Sarah for a few
days after this, to distance himself from her intense level of freakish neediness. Chris
was right. Justin didnt need to get caught up with a woman who couldnt even handle
her mans needs when it came to wanting a little time out, or a little space.
+t was ridiculous, and he felt pressured beyond reason, so he did the only thing that a
guy knew how to do best. *e backed away, and never looked back.
%f course after that Sarah had called him numerous times, and left many te#t
messages, and sent many emails. Justin just decided that it was best to have Chris tell
her that they were no longer an item.
*e couldnt bring himself to face the intense level of ,cra"y that he felt Sarah was
projecting anymore. *e didnt want to constantly feel miserable simply for having
needs as a man.
*e felt as though Sarah was punishing him all the time, and didnt want to always
have to spell it out for her, clear as day either. $alking seemed to do no good, as shed
only twist everything he said into some sick reality where suddenly he was the bad
guy again.
+n fact, shed use whatever he said or did against him, to such an e#tent that ignoring
or avoiding became the only reality that gave him room to e#ist. +t was as if she
wasnt happy, until she made it clear to him that he was not good enough.
6ither way, Justin he was sick and tired of Sarah, and he was through with her. *e had
spent more than enough time trying to reason with her level of ,cra"y, but now he just
wanted to feel normal again.
+t didnt bother him either, to listen to all of her messages crying to him about how
she needed him, after the fact. +t didnt bother him anymore either, to read her
messages calling him all kinds of nasty names, blaming him for everything.
+t didnt matter, because he knew deep down inside that this woman really was out to
lunch, and that was putting it politely.
+n his mind, she was the most unattractive, ugly, and useless woman he had ever
come across, and he was glad to be rid of her.
-hat was even more peculiar was the fact that Justin wasnt even normally this kind
of a guy. /ormally he was a nice guy, but he kept on attracting women who were
completely out of their rockers, time and time again.
*e just simply didnt have the energy anymore to face the level of insanity that most
women were bringing to the table, and he didnt have time for their mind games
anymore. +t was much simpler to avoid, and ignore it now, altogether, even if that
meant breaking a few hearts.
+t was better to break it early, than to get so deep into it, only to struggle to get out
later on if things got more miserable, he reasoned.
5nd so, this is the typical story, of how Justin, like a lot of guys, comes to feel about
women, think about women, talk about women, and approach women.
/ow its important to note that not 544 guys are this way, but a great many men
actually are just like Justin, in that there are certain things which they just wish their
women wouldnt do. -orse yet, is the fact that many men feel like they just cant be
honest with their women, because even when they are, those very same women dont
listen.
+ts also important to note, that guys like Justin are 5C$)5441 the nice guys, deep
down inside, so if you think they are rude, mean, arrogant, cruel, or worse7 then +
want you to imagine how bad it is, inside the mind of men who actually 586 intending
to be jerks.
1ou see, if you could be a fly on the wall, during the moments when your man can
5S%4)$641 be honest, without having to worry about whether or not you would
overhear him, youd be shocked. Conversations like the one between Chris and Justin
are the kinds that happen all of the time, between guys, when they can actually sit
down, and be brutally honest with one another about the women that they love,
admire, or desire.
$he thing is, while not every conversation is as in depth as the one between Justin
and Chris, trust this much9 every single time that a man has to sit down and assess
the woman he is dealing with, trust that internally he will be about as brutally honest,
and even C%4: as the one you just witnessed.
+ts just that men dont actually vocali"e this, and its even ;681 rare for a man to talk
about the woman he is with, with another man as well. +n fact, many men dont do
this at all, and bottle it up inside.
$his bottling it up behavior, means that once a man is finally dealing with this
thoughts and feelings, that they are coming out *58S*41 by that stage.
1ou see, this is why men have /% problems being cold with a woman, once they feel
that they have been pushed past their breaking point. -hats even more profound
about this reality, is that men have a very 4%- breaking point.
+t basically means, that they are like a chunk of glass. +f you drop it on the floor, it
gets shattered into a million pieces. $his is how easily a man can be broken.
/ow + know this goes against all conventional belief systems, because men are
supposed to be strong, independent leaders who are confident in themselves.
ut thats only true when they are working around the parameters of their life
%)$S+:6 of intimacy.
-hen it comes to intimacy however, men are like freakish deer, who &uickly bolt at
even the S4+<*$6S$ hint of an intimidating sound or threat.
/ow this may sound funny, comparing guys to skittish deer, running at the slightest
sound, but this is truly how men are, around women, especially the more intimate
they get with a woman.
<uys basically compare this e#perience, emotionally, to walking into a field of mines,
but not knowing if the ne#t step means that it will be their last.
$hats really how it feels to most men, which is why they are e#tremely skittish, in the
first place.
$his is often why men are cold, distant, and dry around women, even if they have
known that woman for a long time. 5gain, why would a man put up that many walls,
barriers, or throw up that much emotional distance between himself and a woman.
*es beyond fragile, and skittish about the whole reality of being with a woman.
-hy are men like that.
Men are forced to be this way, because of something called the Ultimate Fear.
$he )ltimate 'ear is a nightmarish fear that all men have, of being trapped, caged, or
of losing their life, because of a woman. /ow when + say ,losing their life, + dont
mean that men fear death.
ut rather, + mean that men fear that the &uality of their life, would slowly lower, until
they eventually die on the inside, emotionally, because the woman they chose to be
with, ends up being an energy sucker, and emotion killer.
$his is a mans ultimate fear, and it gets activated around women, especially if those
very same women are doing things to trigger it.
/ow, this report is aptly called the Shameless $ruth report, because of the fact that +
am going to reveal to you, e#actly what it is that a man would /6;68 say to you, but
wishes he could, especially when it comes to everything you are doing that triggers
this e#act fear in a man.
1ou see, the problem is, that any time you trigger this fear in a man, even remotely,
he will run for the hills, and duck for cover, as if you are an atomic bomb itself.
$hats how seriously men take this fear, even when just a *+/$ of a trigger is created,
men react, again, just like deer, and run away skittishly. $hey do this to protect
themselves, and they 6S=6C+5441 do this without thinking twice about it, if they have
no emotional attachment to you yet either.
+n the story + gave at the beginning of this report, about Justin trying to come to
terms about his )4$+M5$6 '658 when it came to his girlfriend Sarah, you will notice
that he didnt really seem to have a whole lot of emotional attachment to her.
$his made it especially easy for him to just completely ignore her, and to turn his
phone off, without even so much as caring about how she felt about it.
-hy wouldnt he care.
*eres the first secret + am going to let you in on9
+f you make a man feel like 1%) dont care about him, or his feelings...he will
reciprocate that emotion >? times more intensely.
/ow it doesnt even matter if you didnt intend on making a man feel that way either,
because so long as a guy $*+/@S that you dont care, and can prove it with your
actions, or words, your intentions no longer matter to him.
+ts important to note, therefore, that men pay attention to your actions, and barely
listen to your words.
1ou could tell a guy, as an e#ample of this, that you love him, but if you are calling
him like cra"y, and cant seem to get away from spending time with him, he will think
that you dont love him, but that you are cra"y for him.
+ dont just mean this in the polite 0+ am e#tremely devoted to you, in a passionate
way!, kind of cra"y. -hen + say ,cra"y, in guyAlingo, this actually means cra"y, as in he
thinks you are nuts, or obsessiveB
-hy does a guy think you are obsessive. 5gain, he is looking at the actions. +f the
actions are showing him that you want to grab a hold of him and make him your
slave, as you take as much time as you possibly can to be around him, and suck the
energy right out from him, he will have no choice but to think you are cra"y and
obsessive.
5gain, even if you meant well, and even if you were only doing that because you
really liked him a lot, it doesnt matter. *e listens to what you are doing, not what you
are saying.
/ow + know that this might not sound fair either, because sometimes the guy doesnt
tell you that this is how he is thinking, and thus you dont learn until after the fact that
it actually bothered him.
So lets say that you called him a lot, and he never really complained, or never really
told you that it seemed weird to him. -ell + have news for you again. *eres another
brutal truth.
Guys hate having to spell everything out for you.
$hey want you to be able to get it on your own. $hey hate having to baby you into
reali"ing simple things all on your own. $hey hate having to feel like a father figure to
you, as they basically teach you the alphabet from 5 to C.
Men want you to be able to pay attention, listen, and get hints before they have to
come along and punch you in the gut, just so you will listen.
-hats even worse, about this reality, is that there is an even more disturbing truth
lying in this mi#. -hat truth is that.
The fact, that men will LI to you, if they feel that !y "oing this, they "on#t
have to face any conflict.
Men are actually forced to lie, just to avoid confrontation or to avoid a negative
reaction from your end, because as a woman, you almost always dont accept reality
as it is. $hats because you think with your emotions, instead of logic.
/ow + know that you dont want to always be stuck in a place where your man is
always feeling like he has to lie to you, because he feels like telling the truth would
cause an argument.
So, what can you do, then in this case. -ell, you learn the truths about men, before
they can use those truths against you, so that you know what to do in the future, to
avoid making your man feel !skittish!, or fearful around you.
+ know that there are things that men hide from women all of the time, and there are
$%/S of things that men would /6;68 6;68 tell a woman, at all costs.
4uckily for you, however, + have compiled those things together into a neat little list of
dirty truths that men almost /6;68 tell the women they love.
+n fact, men would avoid having to do this, like the plague itself. 5gain, theyd rather
lie to you and have things not get complicated, than be $*+S brutally honest.
-hy.
ecause again, men want to avoid conflict. Just like Justin, did, in the story from the
beginning of this report. *e too wanted to avoid conflict, because he felt with each
pressing moment, that it became harder and harder to deal with his girlfriend.
1ou dont want your man, again to feel like its hard to deal with you. 1ou dont want
him to feel like he needs to fear you, and you dont want him to feel like he cant be
open either.
$hus, once again, the real key to getting the truth from a man, is to learn about it all
indirectly. + have revealed juicy pieces of dirty and even disgusting truths about men,
and how they think about you, throughout the rest of this report.
)se these honest truths as a guideline into understanding and handling your man in
the future, because these are the things that your men -+S* very deeply that they
could tell you, but almost every man is $%% afraid to actually do that, due to the
previously e#plained reasons.
5nd now, as a parting gift, +d like to leave you with a laundry list of D? things that
women do, which S6C86$41 makes men sick, as told in the first person perspective,
for the e#tra level of honest and brutal juiciness. Just think of this, like a little secret
diary, that your man has been keeping about you this entire time.
5gain, remember that this is the S*5M646SS truth report, so no holds barred with
anything listed here9
$%& I hate it when I am !usy with wor', !ut you as' me to tal' to you
anyway. My head is in the game. + am busy problem solving, strategi"ing, and + am
wrapped up in my purpose outside of you. 1et here you are, interrupting that
productivity, by asking me to talk to you when + am at work.
+snt it enough that + talk to you, and see you after work. -hy do you have to come
in and distract me.
4et me make it clear for you7if + am busy doing something, and you come in yapping,
+ get annoyed, real fastB
$(& )hen I am "oing something, !ut you want me to instantly "rop
whatever I am "oing, to listen to whatever you have to say that very
minute. *onestly, it doesnt even matter if + wasnt busy eitherB +f + am somewhere
else, doing something else, it means that + am /%$ stopping for you, just because,
especially when you barge in with a slurry of useless information, and take >? years to
get to your point.
$*& )ill you +ust get my si"e of the story alrea"y, Euit trying to attach
your own hidden agendas, strange assumptions, or anything else to what + am saying.
$ake it as it is, because + am sick and tired of always having to defend everything +
say, because you cant just accept it as it is. +f you cant accept my answers, dont ask
for them thenB
$-& )hen I give you a yes or no answer, or a very short answer, an"
you "on#t accept it. -hy did you ask for my opinion then. etter yet, forget trying
to 5SS)M6 that there must be more to my answer, that + am not telling you. +f + gave
a short answer7 that is all there is to it. +t doesnt mean that + am hiding something.
+t means that this is all + cared to think, especially if your &uestion is random and has
no conte#t.
$/& )hen you want me to e0plain how I feel, it ma'es me feel li'e you
are trying to turn me into one of your girlfrien"s. + am not going to spend >?
minutes talking about how + feel, if you need that kind of a thing, go ask your
girlfriends. %therwise, + will get straight to the point. +f + am hungry, + will tell you that
+ am hungry. +f + am tired, + will say that + am tired. + dont need to e#plain away my
feelings for >? minutes to convey that reality, so &uit asking me to do that for you.
$1& Sometimes I really am thin'ing a!out nothing. + know its hard for
you to believe, as >?,??? random thoughts flutter through your brain, even as + say
this, but sometimes + just have a blank mind. +m a guy. + can do that. 4earn to accept
it. + can literally just sit here and /%$ think about anything, and guess what. +t
happens 544 the damn time too. So + hate it when you come in, asking me about
what + am thinking about, and then when + say 0nothing!, you argue, saying that it
cant be nothing, and ask me again and again, until + finally answer. ut guess what.
-hen + answer you, its with some crappy e#cuse, designed to simply get you off my
back.
$2& )ill you +ust get to the "amn point alrea"y, *ere you are, again,
revealing detail after detail, after detail again. + am not a chick. + dont need all the
details. + want the bottom line. + am all about the final outcome. +f you want me to
listen to you, will you please just give me the S*%8$ version. %therwise + am sitting
here for the ne#t hour, wondering only one thing9 what is your point. So dont tell me
a million different things. Make it short and sweet.
$3& Stop trying to change me, alrea"y. 1ou chose me, so accept me
already. %therwise, why are you even here, in this relationship. +t really makes me
&uestion what you really want, and if you really want me, when you punish me, for
just being myself. + can improve, but + cant be a different man for you.
$4& )hen you tell me that I can#t "o something, !ut then I catch you
"oing that very same thing later, you !etter e0pect what#s coming ne0t5 +
hate being told to do, but + 6S=6C+5441 hate being told to do, under the premise that
it is a compromise, only to find out later that you werent even doing it yourself. So,
let me get this straight7 you can do whatever you want, but + must bend over
backwards. 1eah, thats not going to happen.
$%6& )hen you point out the o!vious, !ut then you soun" so "um!
"oing it. *ere you thought you were trying to be clever, but + am just wondering
what your point was. Just because something pops up into your head, this doesnt
mean that you immediately have to blurt it out. +t just makes me wonder if you really
have lost your mind.
$%%& I care a!out how you loo'. +f youve gained weight, dont think that +
dont notice that. /ow to your face, + will try to be fair, and nice, for your feelings
sake, but secretly, + want you to do something about it. + hate even having to have
this discussion too where you ask me if you are fat, or if you are pretty. 1es, initially.
ut if you just let yourself go, and dont try after, + am going to regret being with you.
$%(& 7on#t slo!!er all over me, with affection Fand pet names, as if + am
a babyG. + am a grown man. + want to be treated with respect. + dont need you
mothering me. +t grosses me out.
$%*& )hat were you thin'ing, Sometimes you do something S% stupid,
that + actually do sit and wonder7 what were you thinking. -hats even worse is
when you come to me seeking approval, as if + am going to sit here and tell you that
what you did was smart. =lease, for once, just be smart, about some of this stuff.
$%-& 8re you serious, Sometimes the problem that you have, is so hilariously
pathetic, that + have to ask you, 586 1%) '8+C@+/<, @+::+/< M6. +f youre going to
come to me with a problem, at least make it challenging and respectful to my level of
intelligence. :ont come to me with useless crap, that you should be able to deal with
on your own by now, e#pecting me to baby you. + am not your father. + am your man.
$%/& )hen you try to wear the pants in the relationship, it ma'es me
feel li'e you "on#t even nee" a man. +f you want to be the man, why do you need
me. 6ither you want a man, and you want to let him do his job, or you want to be the
man, in which case, why am + here again. 5ppreciate my role as the man in the
relationship, and dont step all over on my toes as + try to be that man for you.
$%1& )hen you actually as' me to tell you more, or to answer
something, !ut then you cut me off an" "on#t even let me finish. 6#cuse me,
but there are two people in this relationship, and there are two people in this
conversation. :o you want me to talk, or do you just want to be heard. :ont ask me
to talk, if you just want to yap your face off. +ts rude and disrespectful.
$%2& )hen you "on#t ta'e my a"vice, !ut listen to everyone else
instea", even if they sai" the same thing that I sai". So you came to me,
asking for my opinion. + gave it straight to you, but the ne#t thing + know, you are
completely ignoring that advice. 1et if somebody else tells you the same thing,
suddenly its 0gold! to you. $hen when + remind you that + said it first, you get all
mousey, yet you still do this over and over again. -hy even ask me then.
$%3& I am insecure too. 1ou think that you can just say anything to me, do
anything to me, and that + am indestructible. Just because + am a man, doesnt mean
that + am not insecure too. + let you be insecure, but you make fun of me if + am.
-hat do + even do with that reality. 1ou tell me.
$%4& I want to feel li'e a 'ing. Just like you want to feel like a &ueen. + am
tired of always having to work to make you feel like a &ueen, because sometimes +d
just like to stop, and have you make me feel like a king in return. 5nd no, + dont
mean se#ually. Sometimes + just wish that youd respect me, and my authority a bit
more. +s that too much to ask.
$(6& 9es, I loo' at other women, !ut so what: I 'now you loo' at
other men5 %h boy, here we go again. + am the bad guy. So + stared at another
chick. 5nd. 1ou act as if doing this, is the e&uivalent of mentally undressing her. 5nd
so what if + was doing that. 5re you going to tell me that you never do that mentally
with the men that you find attractive. <ive me a break alreadyB Euit trying to play it
all innocent here too, as if + am the only one doing this in this conversation.
$(%& ;h, an" +ust !ecause I loo' at women, it "oesn#t meant that I
want to !e with them5 +m a visual creature. + cant help it. ut punishing me for
this by getting severely jealous each and every time this happens doesnt make me
feel good about being e#clusive to you either. +n fact it makes me &uestion why + even
bothered, because you clearly dont understand the difference between a thought and
an action. $hinking is not the same thing as doing something, my dear.
$((& I can never ma'e enough money5 + know this. ut + dont need you
on my back about it every second either, and + also dont need you on my back about
it, when + am trying to get more money. So if + work longer hours, to accomplish this,
dont hate me. + let you have your dreams, so let me have mine.
$(*& Sometimes I go to wor', or even stay late at wor', +ust to escape
having to "eal with you. +f you are really moody, or if you argue with me too often,
+ will sometimes go to work, just to escape having to deal with you. + even stay late at
work, just to be able to avoid you.
$(-& I wish that sometimes you#" !e more reasona!le. 1ou twist what +
say and turn that back on me. 1ou make a mountain out of a mole hill. 1ou get moody
and e#pect me to read your mind. Cant you just be a little bit more reasonable
sometimes, and get to the actual issue, so that + can know what it is that is actually
going on in your head.
$(/& I hate how it#s always a!out how you feel. Cant it just sometimes
be about how something really is, without dragging your emotions into everything,
every second of the day. + mean + bend over to your reality, but cant you bend over
into mine, at least some of the time.
$(1& )ill you get a life alrea"y, 1ou barely go out with your friends
anymore, and you dont really have any hobbies outside of me. 5fter a while this just
feels too intense for my liking. Cant you just get your own life already. Euit trying to
hog mine.
$(2& 7on#t start an argument you "on#t want to finish. +f youre going to
go out of your way to insult me, or to take a jab at me, then you better be able to
handle the argument that follows. 1ou cant just come in, guns bla"ing, and e#pect me
to sit idly by and be %@ with it.
$(3& If I with"raw, "on#t automatically assume that it#s your fault.
$heres nothing more disappointing, and annoying, than when you dont get that
sometimes + just need my own space. + have my own personal issues, just like you do,
and sometimes + pull away to deal with them. Cant + just take space, to do that,
without you freaking out and taking it personally.
$(4& )hen will you actually listen to me, instea" of always hearing
what you want to hear, *ere + am e#plaining myself, and then suddenly you are
twisting everything + said around into something that + didnt even say, or didnt even
meanB -hat the heck is that.
$*6& )hen you tell your girlfrien"s something that was suppose" to
!e private !etween us, I secretly hate you5 + dont go around revealing your
private business to a bunch of other people, so why do you do that to me. +t really
makes me &uestion whether or not + should trust you, but it really hits me below the
belt too, when you do this with private and intimate informationB + shared it in
confidence, so at least respect me enough to keep it that wayB
$*%& I "on#t care how many times you tell me that you love me, if you
"on#t respect me5 + want you to respect me more than + want you to love meB +
dont care if you love me, if you are disrespecting me every step of the way. 8espect
means more to me, than H stupid words that you cant back up with action.
$*(& )hy "o you as' me to help you, if you "on#t even want to listen
to my a"vice, $here is nothing more annoying, than a woman who listens, but who
doesnt follow my directions. 1ou asked me to help you, but then you go and do the
opposite of what + said. $hats like telling me that my advice was dumb, and that you
chose to do something else insteadB 'orget it thenB + hate helping you when this is
how you repay me, and dont ask for my help again after thisB
$**& If I am "eli!erately ignoring you, it#s for a reason5 $his was by /%
accident. +t means that + tried telling you to stop doing something that was making
me angry, and you ignored me. +d rather not hurt you, so + take space, in hopes that
you will notice this and listen to me finally. ut then you come in, and do something
like this ne#t point7
$*-& I hate it when you as' me what you "i" wrong, when I clearly
tol" you what you "i" wrong. $his is basically like completely disregarding the fact
that you hurt me, or made me angry, by coming in and forgetting the fact that you
did. +f + have to keep telling you what you did wrong, + am going to start wondering
about whether or not you actually just want me to spoon feed you every step of the
way. )se some logic, ne#t time.
$*/& <ow much =;R "o you really nee", More kisses, more shoes, more
cuddling, more talking about your day7. Sometimes, just sometimes, can there please
be an end to your need for ,more, just so that + can take a break from having to
constantly provide for you all of the time. + need to rejuvenate my energy, to be able
to do more for you all the time too. 5 little break from time to time, in your needs
never hurt anybody.
$*1& <ow o!sessive can you !e, /o really. -hen + first asked myself this, +
found myself asking this again, and then again. + mean really. *ow can one woman
be this needy. Can you just tone down the obsession and desperation just a tad bit so
that + dont feel like + am dealing with a stalker, instead of a girlfriend.
$*2& >an you stop +umping to conclusions, + mean really, + was on page
one, and suddenly you jumped to page 23?, without e#planation, and somehow all of
the information between page one and 23?, + am at fault for, and am supposed to be
aware of.
$*3& ;ne ?uestion at time, "ammit5 + hate it when you bombard me with
&uestion after &uestion, without even stopping to first let me answer the first
&uestion. + need some time to answer you, sometimes, but you never seem to reali"e
this, as you blast me with &uestion after &uestion, just because + didnt answer you
right away. :ont assume that just because + didnt answer you, that + am /%$ going
to. <ive me some time to do that, dammitB
$*4& 9ou are the @8G <8G5 Sometimes + wish + could take my hand, and
cram it down your throat, because you just nag, and nag, and nag, and then nag
some more. *onestly woman, S*)$)=B + got your point, H3 nags ago, but youre still
going on.
$-6& >an you +ust "rop some of this stuff alrea"y, + mean this is the
23?
th
time that we are talking about it, and + already damn talked this so many times
with you. + thought we worked through this, and here you are bringing it up againB
:eal with it privately then, if you just cant get over it, because + am done with itB
$-%& 7on#t as' me to !e !rutally honest, if you can#t even han"le it. +ts
like setting me up to be punished. *ow cruel can you be. 6ither you want honesty, or
you want me to lie to you. ut you better make up your mind which thing you want,
because you cant have both realities at once.
$-(& It#s really unattractive when you act li'e such a whiny cry !a!y5
1oure crying all the time, over all kinds of things. + said something, you took it the
wrong way, now you are balling your face off. 1ou are mad, now you are crying.
Sometimes + wonder when the heck, are you /%$ crying though. -oman up just a
little bit here, and stop acting like an overgrown babyB + can handle your emotions,
but if you have to cry and whine, go outside.
$-*& 7on#t act so helpless all the timeA I 'now that you can "o some
of this stuff yourself. + cant be and :% everything for you. Sometimes your
helplessness is pathetic, and it really turns me off, because + feel like + have to carry
my weight, plus your own. =ull your own weight in the relationship, by carrying
yourself first.
$--& Buit trying to ma'e me +ealous, it +ust ma'es you loo' immature.
+ can see through it, and + can see why you are doing it, but its not going to work on
meB +t just makes you look bad, and you demean yourself, by using stupid tricks to try
and get my attention.
$-/& >an you fight a!out something, without ta'ing it personally, for
once, 6very time we try to talk about something serious, you suddenly come in and
take it personally, so now we arent dealing with the actual problem, but are dealing
with your insecurities. Can you just keep it on the actual subject for once.
$-1& Stop using se0 as a weapon to get what you want5 -hen you
withhold it from me, it only makes me feel like ultimately you arent even truly
attracted to me.
$-2& 7on#t +u"ge me !ase" on my past actions. $hats basically like
refusing to move on from them, and secondly, thats like being in a state where you
/6;68 want to forgive me or move on eitherB + am living here in the now. :ont drag
me back to the past all of the time. 8ecogni"e my efforts in the present time.
$-3& Use your own "iscretion aroun" me, instea" of always assuming
that I will tell you what to "o all of the time. So, if something is going to hurt
you, its better not to ask me, if you @/%- this. :ont assume that + know this, and
dont assume that + will just come in and tell you what to do about that either, or dont
think that + will always know the right thing to do. )se some of your own discretion
first, so that you arent always putting me in a place where + will become the bad guy,
its bad of you, to do that to meB
$-4& Buit !eing so insecure. + find you attractive, and want to be with you,
but you keep on pushing doubts onto that reality, by constantly pointing out all of the
things that you hate about yourself, but then you e#pect me /%$ to notice that.
$/6& 7on#t e0pect me to rewar" you for !a" !ehaviour. Misbehaving or
throwing emotional temper tantrums is not something that + usually respond to, or
even reward. +f you want me to change my behaviour or want me to get a point, spit
it out directly, instead of indirectly punishing me with bad behavior, thinking that + will
change just because you got moody. +f anything, + will avoid youB
$/%& Buit !eing such an attention hog. +t cant always be about you.
Sometimes it needs to be about me. Sometimes, it even needs to be about )S. Stop
seeking negative attention too, because + am not going to give in to you, just because
you throw a temper tantrum every time.
$/(& I nee" you to ta'e care of your finances. + cant always be your
personal accountant. + have my own finances to take care of too. +ts time that you
started managing your money properly.
$/*& Stop ma'ing it har" for me to please you. $ell me e#actly what you
need, as you actually need it. :ont tip toe around the actual subject, and make it
absolutely clear. %therwise + might do what you asked, but it wont be what you
wanted, if you arent clear.
$/-& =ean what you say, an" say what you "o for a change5 Euit being
so contradictory for once, and actually have your actions match up to your words, so
that you are finally doing the same thing that you said you would. +n other words9 if
you tell me that you are going to do something, go damn do itB
$//& )hen you try too har" to please me, you come across as
insecure. + dont want an insecure woman. + want a woman who is completely
comfortable in herself and her own skin. + dont need a Eueen of :esperation.
$/1& I can#t heal your past, nor am I your past. +f you have unnecessary
baggage, leave it at the damn doorB + dont mind that you have a past, but dont bring
your old patterns into our relationship, or compare me to your e#es. + am a different
person, therefore give me a chance to actually be that person, instead of trying to
pigeon hole me into your past, in some way or another.
$/2& Buit fighting for no reason. + am tired of always having to argue with
you over absolutely nothing, just because you are bored, or feel like you need
attention. +t will make me stop taking your
$/3& 7on#t e0pect me to fulfill all of your wishes. + am not a magic genie,
and + cannot even attempt to fulfill unreasonable wishes. + cant take you on a magical
carpet ride, but + can try to do things that are within reason, and that are asked in
moderation at least.
$/4& Stop trying to compete with me. -e are in a relationship, and we are
not enemies. +ts time to learn that there is nothing to win from me.
$16& Stop trying to !e my =;T<R. + already have a mother. + dont need
you to tell me what to do, and + especially dont need you to baby me. + know how to
take care of myself. +ts time you started respecting that.
$1%& 7o you un"erstan", the meaning of C@;D, + meant it when + said it
the first time. Stop trying to turn that into a challenge, to change my mind, and get
me to say yes. +f + said no, + said it for a reason. 4earn to accept it. *ow would you
like it, if + forced a similar thing on you.
$1(& Respect my !oun"aries. + have them too. +t means that sometimes +
am not comfortable revealing something to you, or doing certain things. + need that
reality to be respected and accepted too.
$1*& 7on#t +ust !e nice to me for no reason. + hate it and it seems like you
are sucking up to me, because you either want something, or because you have an
ulterior motive. 6ven if you mean well, it doesnt flatter my ego to have you be nice to
me, without even justifying it in the first place.
$1-& 7on#t apologiEe for everything5 Sometimes you meant what you said,
we get itB 1ou dont have to be sorry for every little thing you do. +f you apologi"e
after everything, even the things you meant, how can we be secure in anything that
you say or do, if you cant even make up your mind either.
$1/& Buit !eing so nitpic'y. Sometimes all of the little details just dont
matter, and dont belong in the conversationB Sometimes, the little details even get in
the way, if we are trying to get something done in a hurry, or if we need you to just
get something done too.
$11& Lying a!out how much time something will ta'e, doesnt make it
any better when we reali"e that youre going to take an hour to get ready anyway.
4ying me, just makes me feel like you assume that + cant even handle the truth. + can
deal with the truth. + dont like it, however, when you lie about something, just to try
and make it easier for yourself.
$12& 0pect the "ifferences, instea" of fighting them. :ont e#pect me
to be an e#act replica of you. + have my own personality traits and my own &uirky
habits. 6#pect me to be different, and better yet, 5CC6=$ thatB
$13& )hen I give you a compliment, ta'e it for once. :ont try to argue
in your head, why this cant be true, or deny it. +f + am telling you this, its because +
truly mean it, so dont trash what + am trying to say, by refusing to accept it, or by
trying to break my compliment down so that it cant be true for you anymore.
$14& I actually li'e to help you, !ut only when it#s with something
new. -hen its the same problem over and over again, + grow e#hausted of trying to
help you. + dont mind a challenge, and + even love problem solving, but + hate it
when you give me the same problem over and over again, to solve.
$26& 7on#t try to play stupi" aroun" me, because it just makes me feel like
+ am dealing with an idiot. +f anything it makes me feel stupid for even bothering to
try and waste my time with somebody who + thought could at least deal with things. +
guess you want to play around instead.
$2%& 8ccept responsi!ility for once, for some of the things that you
actually shoul". 1ou cant always try to play coy, and avoid dealing with reality. +t
will come back to bite you in the ass hard if you keep avoiding it, and only makes you
look like you cant handle the serious stuff in the relationship.
$2(& 7on#t play frigging min" games with me5 + am the master of games,
and you will sorely lose if you think that you can come in over my head, and
undermine me every step of the way. 6ither you want to be direct, or you want to
shoot yourself in the foot. 1our choice, but dont e#pect me to stay idle as you play
me for some kind of a fool each time.
$2*& Remem!er that I have feelings too5 Some of the stuff that you say,
stings me too, and some of the things that you do, really dig in deep. + might not
always say it, but you should at least be courteous enough to @/%- that + have
feelings too, before you get really snarky, rude, or insult me.
$2-& Buit assuming that I only thin' a!out, or want se0 all of the
time. Sometimes + like to cuddle too, and sometimes + am not in the mood tooB 1eah,
thats rightB + can feel turned off as well. So dont just assume that + am always
0game! for a little se#y time, every waking moment either. +t has to feel right for me
too.
$2/& =a'e some of the things that I "o, goo" enough for once5 +m
tired of always feeling as if some, or all of the things that + do are not good enough
for you. + can only do so much, so if + am trying my best, learn to appreciate that, and
acknowledge it for once, so that you can actually see the value in what + am doing.
$21& 7on#t ta'e everything so seriously5 SeriouslyB *ave a sense of
humour once in a whileB 'igure out sometimes, that + am being sarcastic, before you
get all offended, and start feeling hurt, over something that was meant to be a jokeB
%h, and dont take yourself so seriously either. +ts no fun feeling like + have to walk on
egg shells around you, because you cant even laugh at yourselfB 4ighten upB
$22& I "on#t want to hear a!out all of the pro!lems, that all of your
frien"s are having. Seriously. Sheesh. +ts bad enough that you had to sit through
hours of them complaining about their life, but its even worse when you make me sit
down and listen to it all too. =lus it seems like youre a huge gossip &ueen, when you
do that. +f + was forced to listen to you talk about a problem in general, +d rather just
listen to you talk about your own problems.
$23& Buit !eing such a chic'en5 e adventurous. :ont be afraid to try new
things. +t gets boring always hearing about how you are too afraid, too insecure, or
too uncertain to try new things, especially if those things are things that + want. +
bend for you, even when + am uncertain, so bend a little for me, in return.
$24& 7on#t over.thin' everything. 4et some of the things in the
relationship, and with me be simple for once. $hey dont always need to be thought
about to infinity and beyond, and they dont need to become comple# either. +ts ok to
take pride in the little things, especially the everyday accomplishments.
$36& Let me !e a man5 $rust my guidance, and leadership for onceB $rust
that + will provide for youB :ont throw me under your doubt train every step of the
way, as you &uestion or undermine my abilities. $ry to let me lead, so that + can
actually start doing my job as a man for you.